Consciousness pecks at you like a bird. You gradually become fully aware of your own body, lying in sore and tender repose in some pool of tepid liquid. Opening your eyes, you find yourself in a dimly lit cave, the yawning mouth nearby opening outwards onto a miserable expanse of rain-soaked jungle.

You are Bertram Gillivers, and everything starts to come back to you now. You were prestigioiusly and fortuitously shipped away on an imperial voyage of exploration and expansion after your tenure as apprentice ended and your career as a Court Alchemist began. More than likely, this was done by the careful hands of the other alchemists, to remove a promising figure such as yourself from daily court intrigue. At any rate, the island you've dropped anchor upon was less friendly and more inhabited then originally anticipated, and after some close calls with the vicious wildlife and tantalizing glimpses of what you believe to be an indigenous people, you were carried off into the jungle, tangled in the pained thrashings of some centipedal nightmare beast. You trace a hand along your skin, feeling the tender patches where your flasks of acid burst upon you.

You see that several of your possessions have been thoughtfully piled near the cave mouth, which is reassuring and off-putting all at once.

CURRENT STATUS:
Alchemical Formulae Known:
-Sunsphere, defensive weapon
-Dragon's Blood, offensive weapon
-Smokebomb, defensive/utility
-Arms and Ammunition, Apprentice-level
-Medicine, Novitiate-level
OTHER EQUIPMENT:
-Pepperpot Blunderbuss
-Eagle Eyes, binocular/magnifying lenses
-Phosphorescent Glove/Firestarter
-Armor-plated Robe, Light

With a sigh, you realize that the many delicate glass vials and assemblages housing your alchemical components and solutions have been removed or in some cases smashed to shards. Your firearm appears to have a decent amount of shot, however.

>What do?

>>11929396
Gather up all of our stuff and then carefully examine the cave for clues as to who brought us here.

Ah, there you are, thought you wouldn't show.

>Take detailed look at surroundings, check self for injury

>>11929396
Reload our weapon with shot, then examine the cave that we are in.

>>11929451
>>11929446
>>11929432
>Ah, my peoples. Excellent.

You slip your reloaded pepperpot into its modified holster, flexing your hands in your gloves. You are still wounded and burned from the conflict, but either you have been unconscious for some time, or you received some kind of medical attention in the interim.

The cave itself is laced throughout with flecks of faintly glowing ore. The pool where you awoke is on a natural shelf worn out of the stone by the dripping action of the water through some unforeseen cracks above. The veins of glowing stone in the shallow pool give it an otherworldly look. Turning to look towards the mouth of the gave, you see the entryway framed by a lithe humanoid figure, and emit a slight, but gentlemanly gasp.

The figure appears humanoid, in that it has a pair of legs and a pair of arms. Beyond that the comparisons become more disparate. In the low light the face seems to be negligably featured, sporting only two black, wet-looking doey eyes and a small, childlike nose. Wet black seaweed clumps of hair cling to the being's sun-browned skin. It wears no clothing, but appears fairly androgynous, regarding you silently.

>What do?

OH SHIT YEAH

"Hail, stranger! Might you be the individual who rescued me from my predicament with the many-legged beast?"

Y'know, something like that, but with good-at-words-
talking

>>11929543
make sure he flashes his glasses up for extra cool factor.

>>11929510
Pull out our dick and perform some sexy experiments.

>>11929510
Be friendly and greet it. Try to attempt communicating appreciation for the help. This is our first contact with what appears to be the natives, we need to make a good impression.

>>11929510
"Greetings! I am Bertram Gillivers, Court Alchemist in service to to His Emminence Emperor Lassivar IV. Are you the one who rescued me? If so, you have my thanks....er...you *do* understand what I'm saying, I hope?"

Oh and don't forget a nice bow for manners.

Also, use lots of gestures NOT TOO wild now.

>>11929543
"Hail stranger!" you call, raising a hand. "Might you be....the...?"
You trail off as the creature approaches you leisurely, coming within a foot. She, or he, stands about a head shorter than you, and seems relaxed and comfortable in your presence. Its eyes, without a hint of color, are fairly disconcerting, as you can't tell exactly where it's looking at any given moment.

From the mouth of the cave, you can see two more of the beings approaching, faded-vellum skin glistening with rain in the shafts of sunlight bursting through the canopy outdoors. They begin to approach as well, feet padding without noise on the cave floor.

>What do?

>>11929628
"Hello..?"
Might as well take a look at them with the Eagle Eyes.

Continue awkward-formal greetings.

stand with arms clasped behind your back, you look bigger and in charge that way. Still with the manners and greeting though.

>>11929628
Greet the two new natives. Try to mime out asking about the creature that attacked us.

>>11929691
>>11929653
>>11929670
You clasp your hands behind your back, gazing into their youthful, mouthless faces. How do they communicate? you wonder. Perhaps some sort of sign language? Advanced empathy? Wait, how do they eat? Fascinating...

"I am called Bertram Gillivers, an emissary of sorts in service to his Emminence Emperor Lassivar IV. I am honored to make your acquantance," you finish, with a polite incline of your head.

The trio seems content to merely watch you talk, standing like slender statues in the dim cave light. They seem perfectly immobile, without even a palpitation of the chest to indicate breath. You swallow nervously.

>>11929741
. . . pull out our dick?"

Tripfags
Tripfags everywhere

>>11929741
Try to take a step forward and examine them more closely. Perhaps if we get a better look at them we can attempt to guess their primary method of communication.

Hold out a hand?

>>11929741
Use our Eagle Eyes assemblage to examine them in closer detail.

If your wearing gloves take one off and use that as your main gesturing hand, keep the talking to a minimum as you eye the creatures carefully.

>>11929741
"Can you understand me?"

>>11929810
I think ZALGO is suggesting that they communicate via a hivemind

tell them you are Locutus of Borg, ask for their designation.

but seriously, eye them a bit.

>>11929806
>>11929801
>>11929789
You remove one of your heavy gloves, holding out a hand nonthreateningly. The beings do not move. You take a step forward, bringing you almost chest-to-chest with the frontrunner of the triad. This time their heads incline, ever so slightly and almost in unison, to continue looking, presumably, into your face, six sorrowful-looking black orbs reflecting the pale flecks of glowing stone in the cave.

From outside the cave, you hear muffled raspy voices and the crashing on underbrush. One of the three silent figures turns without concern to observe the outside of the cave while the others continue watching you impassively. The voices outside reach a warbling fever pitch, chattering in a language you are unfamiliar with.

>>11929863
Investigate, I guess.

>>11929863
Well lets see whats happening outside.

>>11929863
I recommend caution when attempting to see outside.

whoa don't walk outside just like that, there's probably a good reason your new acquaintances are staying in the cave.

Use a gesture to describe hitting or doing harm, maybe with a fist and motion in the general direction of the strange sound.

>>11929928
>>11929922
>>11929906
>>11929883
You pantomime violence to your new companions, with a predictably negligible response. Drawing your pistol, you move to the mouth of the cave, peering out into the jungle, now muggy and humid from the rain which has all but petered out.

In a shallow path through the underbrush, a quintet of knobbly, leather-skinned little humanoids is bickering and fighting amongst themselves. Their bulbous, too-large heads sit atop thick muscular necks, wiry arms and legs lashing out at one another as they shriek violently through wide toothy mouths. One notices you at the cave mouth, and quickly garners the attention of the others. Stubby four-fingered hands reach for awkwardly carved stone daggers, dog-like growling emanating from the humanoid's throats, darting eyes gazing from one another and to you.

>What do?

Fire streaks the heavens, battle has begun.

Return fire only

>>11929982
Sideways glance at your lanky friends, warning shot at the entrance of the cave. Prepare for battle.

>>11929982
Draw your rifle and prepare to fire. I don't like the sound of these guys.

>>11929982
Retreat back into the cave, aim our blunderbuss at the mouth of the cave and prepare to throw a Sunsphere to disorient the attackers.

>>11930036
>nigga you fresh out of chemicals
>>11930031
>>11930018
>>11930005
>warning shot
The jungle echoes with the pepperpot's rapid-fire report, a shot tearing through the canopy over the creature's heads. They fall back swiftly amid much squawking and whining, hiding themselves poorly behind the leaves of a large fern.
Undeterred by the noise or explosion, the three watchers stand to either side of you, empty gazes taking in the scene. You begin reloading the pepperpot.

>What do?

>>11930086
Motion for them to drop the daggers down.

give the cave dwellers one last look and leave swiftly, you don't seem to have any business there.

Creatures that don't react to fire-arms are hiding something.

>>11930086
Finish reloading, and the carefully start moving out of the cave. Make sure to keep something solid against our back so that we're not out-flanked.
We need to get down to the beach so that we can get back to the ship.

>>11930114
>>11930131
"Throw down those weapons, if you would, gentlemen," you call out, moving into the humid underbrush, eyeing the watchers behind you somewhat cautiously and miming a tossing motion to the little gremlins in the bushes, who jeer and hiss at you. You keep your back to the rock face, pushing through the think underbrush cautiously. You can see a few more of the tanned nymph-like humanoids, reclining on tree branches or standing immobile among the trunks, perhaps watching you with their colorless eyes or watching nothing at all. Further into the jungle you can hear the birdlike squawks of the little goblinoids; the commotion seems to have attracted others. Peering up through the canopy, you can see that it's nearly midday, meaning it will be several hours before the sun will tell you which way is south to the beach.

>What do?

I kind of want to acquire a specimen of both of these creatures and do a bit of dissection when we get back to the ship, but we probably couldn't lift two bodies back anyway. Still we should come back later and nab a couple.

>>11930262
Look at the goblin creatures and motion questioning to the natives that brought you here. I want to get a feel for the relationship between this two.

>>11930262
Have we made any physical contact with the nymphs? Perhaps sidle back to the mouth of the cave, keeping our gun trained on the goblins, and try laying our ungloved hand on one of the nymphs there?

>>11930264
>They're pretty light-looking; the problem would be running into another group of them while carrying one of their dead.
>>11930294
The trio of nymphs has moved out of the cave mouth, causing a bit of a commotion in the ferns. Amid the rustling leaves you see the five goblinoids spill out into the underbrush, scrambling over one another to stay away from the silent watchers. They bustle towards you, chattering and jibbering at you and one another and pointing frantically at the three statuesque figures, only stopping when you level the blunderbuss at them. They never seem to be fully quiet, always making small throaty gurgles or chirps, and always fidgeting with their hands, feet, or darting beady eyes.

Continue watching, exploring.

Assess thirst, hunger.

>>11930379
Okay, so the goblins are terrified of the nymphs. Nymphs lack any visible weapons, so their form of attack is probably arcane based.
The only question is, who should we go with?

oh boy, looks like we're gonna end up playing cave explorer.

OH boy

>>11930379
>>11930420
I vote Nymphs, they could've killed us very easily while we were unconscious. They have given us no reason to attack.

>Some people want to explore, some people want to go chill with nymphs, nobody seems to know what to do with the goblins. I've been trying to post every ten minutes or so, but I'll allow some extra time for a consensus.
>Sidenote: I missed questing it up for you guys a bunch. Hopefully I will also be able to do this tomorrow evening.

I kind of want to see what's up with the goblins. It seems to me like we could use them and their knowledge of the land more easily than we could the silent nymphs.

Count me out then, I'll let their choice surprise me.

God damn it, why did we need to get sent off to the land of creepy natives? Couldn't they assign us to the island of hot amazons or something?

Try to physically interact with the nymphs if we haven't already. Learn more about them.

Observe for now.

>Sidenote: I'm going to end up doing an archive for this, aren't I?
>Call it Bertram's Log maybe?
>Damn you, stonerbro.

>Consensus Status: Not Reached
>DM Status: Winging It
>Going to go with AA's suggestion to keep exploring the jungle, and justify myself by saying that the goblin/nymph suggestions cancel each other out.

You keep your gun trained on the goblins for a few more moments before backing slowly away from them. They twitch and chatter at you, gradually falling back to a distance of a few dozen feet. As you move away, however, you can tell that they are slowly following you, no doubt curious, or perhaps simply hungry for your flesh.

The inland jungle is stiflingly hot without the sea breeze. You seem to be at the foot of the large central mountain, as much of the area around you is obscured by rock formations. You could probably follow one of the rough tracks up the slope a bit to try and scout out which way the ship is (or if it's even on this side of the island), or you could wander away from the mountain and hope that you'll hit beach close to the ship. You wonder what became of Sebastian and the other soldiers who came exploring with you. Again, you feel a nagging sense of time lost; how long have you been away from the main group?

>>11930673
Try scouting for the ship and while you do so feel your face for beard growth. That should give us a rough estimate of the time we've lost.

>>11930673
They probably got eaten, which is shame considering we were just starting to get along. Oh well,let's go wander aimless towards a beach.

Definitely feel our face. But hey, maybe there's some time magic afoot, who knows.

Reach higher ground and survey our surroundings. First rule of survival.

>>11930695
You scratch the stubble on your chin, pointedly ignoring your childlike goblin trackers. Your beard grows slowly and fitfully, so this is not the best indicator of time, but you could definitely use a shave, suggesting a recovery period of at least a few days.

Brushing aside a few great fronds of underbrush, you find a clearing in which a half dozen goblins have surrounded one of the nymph-like humanoids, which regards them passively as they circle and jeer, some armed with the stone daggers you've already seen, and some with short obsidian-tipped spears. Like the others they never, ever, ever shut the hell up or sit still, prancing around the unmoving being, clad in filthy bits of hide and fur. The goblins that were tracking you scamper around you, momentarily heedless of you or your blunderbuss, to observe their emboldened brethren.

>What do?

>>11930797
Observe the interaction, this should prove interesting.

>>11930813
This, plus intervene if they do anything more violent than act like children.

Try to shoo them away.

Let's try to get our sense of direction a bit, as well. Me must know roughly in which cardinal direction we arrived at the island on.

>>11930838
>>11930813
You step slightly into the clearing, watching the interaction between the two native species.
The goblins dance around the nymph, occasionally shoving one another closer to it, as though daring themselves and their fellows to touch it. The five who entered with you seem a bit more wary; perhaps two different tribal ideologies are at play here.

The nymph, which was slouched motionless, stands up slowly, causing a momentary panic among the surrounding goblins, who scrabble away from it, their bravado vanished like smoke. The nymph then begins moving towards you, tough-skinned blowhards scattering like leaves. It approaches to within a few feet of you, then stops, watching you with its black eyes. There is a tense moment of silence broken only by the hornet-like humming of the goblins now surrounding both of you. Eventually you feel a slight tugging on the bottom of your robes; a quick glance reveals that one of the goblins is yanking on them, while a few others whisper to one another, unwilling to let you hear their unintelligible secrets.

>What do?

1. Sit down and observe
2. Continue moving through the forest

>>11931014
>meant to put an "or" there.

>>11930993
Don't let them touch us, they need to regard us as a possible threat just like the Nymphs. We need to have a violent response to them touching our clothes, even coming close to us.

>>11930993
So something happens when you touch the nymphs. We need to find out what, perhaps we can push a goblin into this one.

"Hey, none of that!" you say sternly, shaking the goblin off your robes and gesturing threateningly with your firearm. The creature pulls back meekly, wimpering. The situation is interrupted, however, as the nymph stumbles into you.
You are shocked as the creature makes actual physical contact with you, and it quickly recovers to a standing position, the obsidian tip of a spear protruding from its lithe torso. The goblins are, for a blessed moment, as miserably silent as the nymph itself. It does not bleed, but rather arcane wisps begin flitting out of both sides of the wound. The now-spearless goblin responsible for the assault makes a throaty bark of uncertain triumph. The nymph watches you impassively, wisps continuing to flee its soft torn flesh as it loses its precise balance again, toppling silently to its knees. It remains emotionless, displaying no apparent pain, as it calmly touches the spear once, falls to the side, and remains still.

The goblins erupt into hysteria. The five that accompanied you seem visibly distraught, pointing and shouting at the other six, five of whom are very suddenly deferring to the murderous sixth as their leader, who seems uncomfortable with all this attention. Daggers are drawn on both sides, with you in the middle.

>What do?

rolled 47 = 47

>>11931172
Back out of the way, if one comes near us with a weapon we shouldn't hesitate to fire. Try to let the goblins settle it between themselves. Watch how the nymphs handle it, be ready to run rather then help.

>>11931172
Shoot the one that stabbed the Nymph, if they don't settle down afterwards, fire at will.

>>11931218
Seconding.

>>11931244
>>11931218
You back slowly away from the escalating conflict. The goblins seem less interested in you then they are in tearing each other's throats out, and what seemed originally to be childish maliciousness is confirmed as murderous sociopathy as the two sides clash violently, surrounded by the pastoral flittings of the arcane wisps. The nymph lies forgotten and still to one side as the goblins stab and hack fiercely at one another. You could theoretically take the body with you while they fought, for later examination.

>Y/N?

>>11931313
Bring it back to the cave nymphs.

>>11931313
Y
>captcha: Investigation prenry

>>11931313
Why not? Take it and leave.

If everything goes smoothly commences epic dancing, you were born for this.

>>11931330
>>11931336
>>11931338
>Yes
Stooping slightly, you scoop up the unmoving humanoid in your arms. Its eyes are still open, seemingly watching you as you cradle its unsurprisingly light frame. You become aware, however, that any noise in the clearing has stopped.
Three of the goblins are dead, and almost all the others are bleeding from multiple wounds. They have stopped fighting, however, to observe you with total awe, weapons slowly dropping to the ground. Several of them fall to their knees, slack-jawed fang-filled mouths hanging agape as they stare stupidly. They cluster closer, humming and droning to one another.

>What do?

>>11931463
You, cave, NOW.

>>11931463
Take the body to the others and motion back to the goblins. Head back home after you're done.

>>11931531
>>11931485
You back away from the goblins.
"Steady now, little ones. We don't want to be doing anything too rash, at least not to me..."
You retrace your steps through the jungle, coming soon to the small cave inlet. The three nymphs from earlier are nowhere in sight, though you can see a few out in the jungle, watching the trees or seemingly sleepwalking slowly about. You set the nymph down in the shallow pool where you awoke, hoping that it itself holds some sort of regenerative properties, and then exit the cave.

The goblins veer away from you outside, now as fearful to approach or touch you as they usually are the nymphs. The small cluster has grown somewhat, maybe eight or ten unwounded goblins having joined the remains of the conflict in the clearing. The sun has moved towards the horizon somewhat, and you can calculate a general southern direction towards the ship. Your stomach is rumbling, and you are unsure of the last time you ate a real meal.

>More exploran? or timeskip back to the ship?

>>11931583
Back to the ship, we a shave and good meal in us.

>>11931620
The longhouse just off the beach is finally done, and a few rudimentary huts have gone up, with plans to have some real cabins up in the next few weeks. Captain Speer scratches his beard pensively, chewing on some poorly-cooked fish fried over the beach's roaring campfire. Several other soldiers are also seated around the fire, passing a bottle of spirits amongst themselves. One rises, pointing down the sand.
"Emperor's Bones, captain...look!"
Tattered and weary, you shamble into the fire's light, eyes drooping sleepily. You were many miles inland, and the going through jungle underbrush is not swift or easy. One of the men hands you a bit of fish that you devour eagerly.
"Glad to see the habitations are coming along nicely," you remark around a mouthful of fish. "We need to do something about these though," you add, turning to look back into the night.

Beyond the fire's light glint the eyes of the three dozen goblins that have followed you here like some sort of pilgrimage.

>That's it for tonight; hopefully you'll all see me again tomorrow. I hope people are enjoying themselves, and I hope you'll tell me if I'm running things in a way you don't particularly like.

>>11931701
Ah good, I was just passing out anyway.

Slow night, but things should eventually pick up.

My internet just returned after days of hiatus, and sup/tg/ showed me that ALCHEMYQUEST is on.

FUCK YES. Now to the reading. Stonerbro, you rock and I hope you haven't finished the thread before I catch up.

>>11933127
Far too short for my taste, but I hope this is the wind-up for something awesome. Awesome being the usual fruit of StonerDM's threads.