Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1260030130.jpg-(44 KB, 300x364, Dwarf_by_KaRzA_76.jpg)
    44 KB Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:22 No.7013523  
    So, I've finally caved in and made a setting where the dwarves are all drunken Scottish vikings. Manly motherfuckers who hate magic, spit and snarl in an outrageous accent when they aren't singing, and use axes bigger than they are.

    The important thing to know here is that this is already a setting where elves are satanic glam-rock spellsingers (wit humans for their groupies), orc life revolves around a Dethklok-esque notion of "brutality", and halfelves use magic to make their own crack. I have no excuse not to go all fucking out.

    Fatguys, tell me how to make dwarfs as ridiculously awesome as possible.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:28 No.7013567
    Vikings you say?

    Have them build longboats of pure adamantium, rowed by the strongest of the dwarves with oars made of the finest steel. On the prow of these boats is a sculpture in which there lies a portal to the elemental plane of fire, when activated, it will spew out flame to incinerate all in it's path, inculding the very earth.

    These are the Dwarven tanks, their fire sculptures melting the land, paving slick roads upon which these hellish longboats can ride, spewing iron and flame and bolts at all in range, and slashing at any who get too near, as the oars double as axes, of course.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:36 No.7013616
    That is amazing.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:36 No.7013619
    This. Plus if elves are glam rock, and orcs are dethklok brutal death metal, make dorfs hard rock. AC/DC style party dorfs living the rock and roll lifestyle, at the expence of who they raid (everyone else). They sing anti-magic and their rock is focused with giant technical clockwork arrays to weaponise them.

    Oh, and axe guitars.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:38 No.7013634
    dwarves dont actually mine with tools they simply beat the shit out of the earth until it gives up the ore and gems they want

    their beards are immune to literally all harm you could make armour out of them if it were possible to do anything with them

    dwarven beer is actually poisonous to all other forms of life due to it being 150% alcohol ( insert random handwavery about dwarves being so hardcore they do it )
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:39 No.7013640
         File1260031187.gif-(32 KB, 600x600, 1252909021419.gif)
    32 KB

    A giant metal fire-breathing boat which can sail anywhere because it turns everything into lava?

    Are you fucking serious.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:40 No.7013641
    Have them also be or have been at war with the most vicious, cunning, and dangerous beast of all time...carp.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:40 No.7013645

    Surely you mean heavy metal? Because glam rock is poncy, and death metal is a fucking abomination.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:42 No.7013655
    So. Fucking. Stolen.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:42 No.7013656
    I meant HARD ROCK.

    But heavy metal could also work really well, particularly if we're keeping it to metal.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:43 No.7013664
         File1260031382.jpg-(136 KB, 600x540, Leman Russ (101).jpg)
    136 KB
    Oh, I am quite serious.

    Do we need some more?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:43 No.7013666
         File1260031391.jpg-(66 KB, 314x236, thor-reaction2.jpg)
    66 KB
    It's.... it's beautiful.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:43 No.7013668

    That's way more Dethklok than anything.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:44 No.7013675
    Brb drawfaggan
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:44 No.7013678
    Dwarves have no metal. Instead they roar out with songs ala Dropkick Murphy's. IN a battle these chants reach a fevered a pitch and their bards focus this energy into a single dwarf at once. This dwarf proceeds to lead the charge into the fight swinging an axe so huge that blocks the sun.

    This dwarf also projects an aura of Anti magic so long as the chanting keeps up.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:45 No.7013685
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:46 No.7013692
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:48 No.7013703
    >Instead they roar out with songs ala Dropkick Murphy's.


    this is so right it can`t be wrong
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:51 No.7013721
         File1260031898.jpg-(81 KB, 600x495, kramer-axe-guitar1.jpg)
    81 KB
    favored weapon
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:51 No.7013722
    > ... these chants reach a fevered a pitch and their beards focus this energy into a ...

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:53 No.7013737
    The dwarves don't actually mine much, they just scream and rock so loudly that the performers actually turn themselves into solid metal or stone by pure dwarfy force of will. Their weapons, boats, fortresses, everything is built out of thousands upon thousands of dwarven corpses thus transformed. The power of the dwarf is relative to the rarity and strength of the material, so adamantium is made from the oldest and most powerful dwarves.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:54 No.7013739
         File1260032069.jpg-(160 KB, 500x400, 3303208436_38f2ae8e5b.jpg)
    160 KB
    dorfen flamethrowers
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:55 No.7013743

    Fuck no, punk is shit and so are you faggot.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:55 No.7013744

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:55 No.7013750
    dwarves don't need to eat, they chew their own tongues like bubblegum.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:56 No.7013756
    punk may be shit as a genre but dropkick murphy's are good despite it
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:58 No.7013768
    Seconded. Besides, they RAWR POWER. Better than most metal.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)11:59 No.7013775
    and find some way to incorporate this music video
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:00 No.7013779
    Kinda Richard in here.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:00 No.7013785

    Flogging Molly > Dropkick Murphys.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:04 No.7013818
    I just picture Dwarves doing shit like this before battles

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:10 No.7013874
    They play epic celtic folk-punk. Happy?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:11 No.7013880
    OP here. AC/DC dwarfs had actually crossed my mind, but the epiphany I had earlier was to lean more towards British metal (Manowar, Iron Maiden, prettymuch anyone who has featured a warrior guy and a British flag on one of their albums). Righteous, with lots of medieval overtones.

    But for the record, music motif is used for inspiration but isn't a committed theme. Not everyone needs a genre, for instance, and the "Dethklok orcs" thing won't be as obvious to the players.

    The reason for this is because of delicate little fellows like >>7013743 , whose egos cannot endure a positive reference to a genre they've rejected. Sure, no one I game with NOW is like that, but this setting is the kind of project that may end up simmering for awhile.

    I didn't want this to be a /mu/-shitfest, but I just discovered a cool and very-dwarfy band, so what the hell. Just try to keep the condemnations down to a dull roar.

    You guys kick ass. Everything so far is great, keep it coming.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:14 No.7013899
         File1260033283.jpg-(214 KB, 1680x1024, Metalship.jpg)
    214 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:16 No.7013914
    Looks like a throbbing black cock that's cumming blood and puss.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:17 No.7013919
    How appropriate, it's going to fuck the world.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:18 No.7013932

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:24 No.7014008
    My dwarves all wear monocles and smoke pipes. They run an underground version of the East India Company.
    In my next campaign, they're also going to use their own technology combined with stolen elven magic to devise a war doctrine that basically consists of sending the enemy's capital into a sinkhole and raising a prefabricated dwarven city in it's place.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:26 No.7014026

    This is one of the many epic song that they will sing as the ride into battle.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:28 No.7014046
    dwarf fact #345: there are no female dwarves, to procreate they fuck Mother Earth herself.

    dwarf fact #346: she gives birth to bearded babies.

    dwarf fact #347: these babies drink ale instead of milk.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)12:39 No.7014150
    neither real punk
    >> sage 12/05/09(Sat)12:41 No.7014166
    "Tantrum" racial ability.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:08 No.7014416
         File1260036529.jpg-(228 KB, 670x970, WiddleBison.jpg)
    228 KB
    Psycho Tanty.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:17 No.7014490
    "I am Vulgaris Magistralis
    I'm riding around on my Mammoth
    I'm boiling my pot on an active volcano"

    >> sage 12/05/09(Sat)13:22 No.7014531
    I assume that the dwarf-arc would need some sort of heat resistance, or else it would grow red-hot and cook the dwarves onboard?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:24 No.7014544
    Hey, it's me again, sage. I did not mean to be sage there.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:28 No.7014577
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:29 No.7014594
         File1260037757.jpg-(54 KB, 600x750, 1207359394449.jpg)
    54 KB

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:33 No.7014642

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:36 No.7014681

    >>7014026 linked to a song with lyrics in some other language, and it had the lyrics in the video, and>>7014490 was me posting the english translation of the first three lines.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:36 No.7014686
    i always thought adamantium was heat resistant and had to be forged not by heating it up normally but by pretty much dropping it into a volcano for a few weeks before it was able to be worked
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:39 No.7014709
    You guys realize you're creating a Brutal Legend setting, right?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:40 No.7014718
    pretty much
    when he mentioned the elves being faggy glam rockers first thing i thought was Lionwhyte as their leader
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:42 No.7014742

    I think Finntroll-esque orks would kick ass but this pretty damn awesome either way.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:45 No.7014779

    By the rules it has a much higher melting temperature than steel by virtue of having more hardness and hitpoints (hence it takes more damage of any kind, including fire, to destroy it).

    This doesn't mean it doesn't get hot, just that it takes longer to melt. It'll still get red-hot and fry the dwarfs on board.

    Unless they get persistent fire resistance somehow and just walk around on a red-hot ship, sweating their hairy balls off.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:50 No.7014853
    I picture halfings rocking out to the White Stripes, or the Vines, Cage the Elephant, stuff like that.
    Gnomes I think would use industrial technometal.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:50 No.7014855
    i think we need a drawfag to get onto that idea because it sounds like it could be amusing
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:51 No.7014871
    Everyone gains fire resistance when you ROCK!

    It's all about the pyrotechnics, man.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:52 No.7014894
    Well said.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:54 No.7014929
    giant mechs made out of granite with adamantium boots. They are equipped with massive pneumatic rockhammers, superheated axes and flame throwers.
    They are piloted by the most insane dwarves with the bigges death wishes.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:56 No.7014946
    I'm not getting the vibe of the elves as 'faggy', more like scary-as-s.hit, despite being beautiful.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:57 No.7014955
    Crippled dorfs go in the giant steam-mechs so they can keep fighting.

    Which is why every dorf boy hopes to get maimed in battle when he grows up.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:57 No.7014962

    You mean from OP's post or from Brutal Legends?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:58 No.7014970

    with "Your ass here" written on the boots
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)13:59 No.7014980
    i think he means from OP's post given the
    > elves are satanic glam-rock spellsingers ( with humans for groupies )
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:01 No.7015005

    I'm picturing this decrepit, miserable dwarf stuck in the cockpit surrounded shifts and levers, with half his hair burned off, one eye, eight fingers, no feat, and the biggest cackling madcap-shit-eating bearded grin you've ever seen.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:05 No.7015056
    The dwarven subterraine is heavily insulated via a heat-sink(portable hole with a pulley in the middle)
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)14:06 No.7015061
    OP here, here's some of my half-baked flavortext for the world.

    Demons are a pervasive force in the world. Diabolists, likewise, are very powerful; I picture them as these sort of death-cult rockstars, a charisma-based magician with a sacrificial knife and glittering red robes, surrounded by fawning servants who practically trip over eachother to be killed in his glory. In return for these blood offerings he can shoot bolts of corruptive fire, wrench demonic minions from the ‘nether, cause enemies to suddenly combust and burn to death, etc. This is important because elves are diabolists as often as they are bards/songmages.

    Elves were the first race, the most beloved of the world’s creator. And, as Its chosen, they had some great duty here: to protect a given place, to remember a sacred song, prepare for a foretold event, or perhaps even just to abstain from a particular apple-of-knoweldge sin. I’m not sure about the details yet.

    What I do know is that elven history is a bloody web of passion, vice, grudges, glory, hubris and betrayal (again, somewhat influenced by The Silmarillion). They’ve had one hell of a run on this earth, but ultimately, they failed. They have betrayed, forgotten, or fallen short of whatever their duty here was. The elves have accepted this and have turned their back on the world. They can no longer reproduce. They take no action in the world at large. They merely drown themselves in decadence and committing their souls to song.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:06 No.7015067
    Guys, we have to consider something here. If Elves are Glam-Rock, wouldn't that mean that they get David Bowie?

    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)14:06 No.7015072
    Humans hear about the songs of the elves from continents away. The elders decry the elves as worse than demons- and there is some wisdom in this view- but the young listen to travelers tails with rapt attention, and amongst themselves, they wonder in whispers of what sublime beauty The Endless Revel must hold. Outcasts and artists slip away alone, moonstruck lovers in pairs, and the young in small groups of ecstatic dreamchasers, all setting off in search of paradise. They may even meet others like them on the road, and thus may find succor or safe-haven in unexpected places, all united in their determination not to die without hearing the songs of the elves.

    Elves have grown accustomed to this. They feel no remorse snaring these naïve humans in the nets of their mind-warping magic: every elf is attended by at least one or two humans who would gladly die for his or her smile. In addition to their magical charms, elves bind humans with elven luxuries which are highly addictive to lesser creatures. And, of course, The Endless Revel itself is addictive in its own way: a phantasmagorical blur of beautiful sounds, sights and sensations which humans can barely comprehend even as they experience it. Humans and elves alike may “go into” the revel for weeks on end, magic taking the place of food or rest.

    Most humans are literally consumed before they’re finished, grinning as they’re sacrificed on a silk altar with a silver knife, or perhaps their lifeblood is drained as a component for a heady elven elixir. Only the most lovely or cherished humans live long enough to show signs of aging and thus be cast aside.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:07 No.7015077
    Every dwarf warrior son wishes for the day when they become an exalt. When fallen in battle the greatest of dwarven warriors are hauled away upon litters of Silver and Adamantine. Their comrades crying out songs of righteous fury and bravery as they weep manly tears and give him the most powerful drought ever devised.

    Over the period of weeks. the mighty warrior is taken from this litter and placed within a steel tomb. From here with yet more raucous battle songs they place his withered form within a steel golem of his likeness. From within he becomes the animating force giving the stell golem his strength and power.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)14:07 No.7015081
    One minute you’re lounging on a bed of cloud-stuff after stumbling out of the most fantastic party on earth; the next you wake up in a ditch in some distant human land, perhaps with a few bruises from transit. And that’s that. Those who don’t die of various magical withdrawals or simple dispair become jaded wanderers, searching for meaning in what has come to be known as the Quiet: the silence after the Revelry. Perhaps they become minstrils, finding that the few tatters and snatchets of elfsong that they remember are more than enough to bedazzle the young and the naïve. And thus the cycle begins anew.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)14:09 No.7015114
    This influx of humans into the Endless Revel means that there are no shortage of half-elves in this world, but elves inevitably cast them away (the sight of an elven face that changes with time is unspeakably gruesome to them) and humans view them as little better than cambions. Nevertheless they tend to have bright dispositions, wedding an elven spirit with a young and unsoiled heart. Their youth lingers for decades, and they are creatures of boundless passion and empathy. They are prone to hedonism yet also revel in earthly experience, and cannot stand to stay in one place for too long. Half-elves are almost never diabolists (as elves often are, if you hadn’t inferred), but are much likely to be chemists, and are thus usually high-out-of-their-fucking-skulls on various magical drugs and addictive potions (which accounts for much of their attitude).

    The greatest difference between elves and half-elves is that the latter do not believe themselves lost. Ever optomistic, there is a growing belief among half-elves that they may be able to redeem the elven race; that they might be able to fulfill whatever duty it was that the elves have failed at (obviously, then, there seems to be some ambiguity here concerning whether or not elves have ‘failed’. Again, I don't have many details yet, just a fuzzy image of how I want things to shape up).
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:19 No.7015209
    I give this, so far, eight dwarven hairy balls out of ten sweaty dwarven hairy balls.

    I'd play it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:21 No.7015231

    Delicious. Perhaps it's an Elven delicacy.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:29 No.7015313
    You mean nobody on /tg/ likes sweaty hairy elven/dwarven balls?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:35 No.7015378
    Elves don't have balls.

    Dwarven balls are fist-sized chunks of various ores.

    So no.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:37 No.7015403
    Dwarfs smelt their greatest weapons from the testicles of their ancestors.

    >> stripedog !99w4lZplhU 12/05/09(Sat)14:50 No.7015524
    what, no alcodorf? this seems to fit into this world mighty fine.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:55 No.7015569


    I just tried suptg and it's turning up nothing.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)14:56 No.7015579
    So you've got a good relationship worked out between humans and elves. But Dwarves. How to fit them in...

    The place to start is creation myth. How about some kind of not from the original creator but spat straight out of the earth as a response to all of this magic and Revelry and assorted faggotry.

    As for dwarven culture, I'd imagine that Dwarves would be the type to emphasize versatility, where one dwarf is taught to forge, to fight, and to rock the fuck out, and indeed anything else that they think might be useful.
    >> stripedog !99w4lZplhU 12/05/09(Sat)15:02 No.7015626
    I forget the name, but the idea that all dwarven folk have very potent alcohol for blood, and that the blood of all the heroes is collected upon their deaths. Hardier the dorf, the stronger the spirit, so to speak.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)15:06 No.7015663

    There's a lot of dynamic history and politics and drama and grandiosity with the humans and the elves, and I planned to counterbalance that by making the dwarves relatively straightforward, uncompromising, and gar as fuck. I figured /tg/ was a great place to turn for that.

    Basically, I'm thinking that dwarves are Lawful Angry while orcs are Chaotic Angry.

    "Spat directly out of the earth".. I don't know if I'll use that exactly, but it has a nice conceptual ring to it in the way it contrasts the elves' story.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)15:07 No.7015675

    That's ridiculous and I love it.
    >> stripedog !99w4lZplhU 12/05/09(Sat)15:12 No.7015716
    I imagine that dwarven kings would have to stay clear of open flames though, you know... highly explosive.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:14 No.7015741
    More like open flames would stay away from dwarven kings!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:15 No.7015749
         File1260044122.jpg-(158 KB, 500x591, 1258326871206.jpg)
    158 KB
    that puts a whole new meaning to balls or steel.

    also picture of badass dorf.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:22 No.7015816

    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:26 No.7015854

    Also, I feel that this is how 40k should have done space-dorfs. Hairy, burrowing race of mineral-people that plants their seed in the ground then digs their young up nine years later.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:46 No.7016027
         File1260045971.jpg-(73 KB, 738x936, 1234083587403.jpg)
    73 KB
    40K dwarves?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)15:51 No.7016079

    I know about squats, but I think that planet-fucking steampunk mole people would have been cooler.
    >> Mootimus 12/05/09(Sat)15:53 No.7016116
         File1260046416.jpg-(164 KB, 900x648, Undead Googlies.jpg)
    164 KB
    Your picture is everything that is wrong with this board, and the stereotypical people who play these types of things.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)16:01 No.7016196

    I think it's supposed to be funny.

    I found it hilarious.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)16:24 No.7016406
         File1260048282.jpg-(261 KB, 791x1051, 1257936685295.jpg)
    261 KB
    that is how I intended it.
    this is a better represntation of a badass character IMO, even if it is an elf.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)16:31 No.7016455
    Soo.. So far we have-

    -Massive fire-breathing lava galleys which can row anywhere by melting the earth
    -Wish to be crippled in battle so that their maimed form may be shoved into a gigantic and dangerous gear-mech.
    -Sing like motherfuckers, and the drunken chants of large groups produce quasi-magical effects.
    -Metabolism that uses alcohol like testosterone or adrenaline. They drink super-booze to become more badass, and the more awesome a dwarf the higher his natural blood alcohol level.
    -Testicle of pure ore
    -Mine with their bare hands.
    -Fuck the earth with their metalic genitalia, producing bearded babies who are chiseled from the earth and booze.

    Is that about the size of it?
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)16:34 No.7016481
    who are chiseled from the earth and given booze, rather.
    >> stripedog !99w4lZplhU 12/05/09(Sat)16:44 No.7016568
    while this is just throwing something else onto the pile, maybe make their hair precious/semi precious metals, just so thin as to seem as though it had been spun. Perhaps all the mithril in the world actually comes from very old dorf beards, which would probably create an animosity between them and Elves considering how much elves seem to like making clothing and armor out of the stuff.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)16:50 No.7016617
    Why do the dwarves have to be Scottish? Couldn't they be Slavic or something?
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)16:58 No.7016681

    Because their modern image is based on a mix of Norse warriors and Scottish coal miners.

    They CAN be slavic or something, they can be whatever you want them to be, but this time I want to just go campy and make them scottish vikings.

    >Perhaps all the mithril in the world actually comes from very old dorf beards

    Suddenly, elves are titanic dicks and their puny silver armor becomes incredibly badass.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:00 No.7016705
    No, they're blood is beer.

    That's why they drink it.
    >> OP 12/05/09(Sat)17:07 No.7016757
    Thread archived for my own personal convenience, though I'll check it tomorrow to see if it's still here. And with that I'm out for the night.

    You guys rocks.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:25 No.7016897
    Have the dwarven invasion force be a massive set of giant cannons that fire dwarves in beer kegs, the dwarves break out of the kegs and start killing shit with their battleaxe-crossbows. They can easily survive the fall because they were carved from the earth, their near stone skin is also what grants a resistance to magic. Also, seekers that use runic pick-axes, they tear out an eye and replace it with a precious gem, their stoneish bodies accept the gem and through full integration the dwarf gains the ability to track and see the auras of magic users. Battle-mounts are great elk with armored tipped horns turning them into galloping spear racks. The mighty elk are bread specifically for battle and as such can carry heavy armor, making them practically siege weapons.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:26 No.7016904
    Fuck my life, one post to late.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:31 No.7016936
    the elves... they stole... OUR BEARDS!

    >> Space Thor 12/05/09(Sat)17:39 No.7016984
    make the head elf David Bowie.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:41 No.7016998
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:48 No.7017049
    Dwarves ought to be a viking steampunk nation. They are revered as legendary by outsiders because the few dwarves who spend their lives outside the Fortresses have been akin to CGI characters.

    They do things like climb mountains using two picks, punch bare-handed through the chests of their enemies, and forge weapons/armor from household materials.

    They consider all surface-dwellers to be weak-willed little pansies, and are convinced that it's got something to do with all the open space. Dwarves press against the stone for their very breath. You can't push against open air. Living on the surface causes weakness.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:52 No.7017085

    Archive this for the love of god...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)17:52 No.7017090
    and his girlfriend lady gaga.

    search your heart /tg/ you know this to be true.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:24 No.7017335
    ok this has nothing really to do with dwarves but...
    halflings- why dont you make them a completely hedonistic/ decadent race based on hellenistic and 17th-18th century european culture. so like they are living in villas and palaces in remote towns where they just drink, do drugs, bone each other and generally be merry.the music theme would be, well think like wagner but will harps and stuff. theyd wear stuff like togas, big wigs, tights, waistcoats , pantaloons etc.
    now heres the kicker- they arent very good at fighting, as what is expected of a race that spends most of its time pursuing all kinds of pleasures. instead they have evolved a unique ability- when they die they exude a rainbow coloured dust that gives a high to people breathing it in, thus any army that attacks them just ends up sitting on their asses sky high. as a result the halflings never get attacked anymore. however, this trait does attract halfling hunters who pick off the odd one in order to sell on their dust for other races to snort and get high off.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:26 No.7017349
    Why not have them use magic? Certain dwarfs can reshape the world through pure dorfenly stubbornness. Any other mage would recognize the spells when they see them, but dorfs refuse to acknowledge that they're doing anything other than making things like they ought to be,
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:30 No.7017383
         File1260055823.jpg-(29 KB, 375x300, rtbh99sbeercavalryiw5.jpg)
    29 KB
    NO!! Dwarven BEAR CAVALRY!!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:30 No.7017384

    Year 144: Halflings develop this rainbow-dust-death effect
    Year 144.1: Halflings go massively extinct, caused by species-wide genocidal lust-fueled "scratch 'n sniff" murders.
    >> stripedog !99w4lZplhU 12/05/09(Sat)18:32 No.7017391
    well sure, I mean they could be like "earthbenders" to borrow a weeaboo term. I mean since they have this relationship with dirt. Seems like you'd be able to summon magma, and large stones from beneath the soil. Probably would be strong against most metals and earth borne implements. However water and uh... plant based things might be especially effective against them.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:42 No.7017479
         File1260056535.jpg-(2.54 MB, 4277x3024, DRAGOOOOONNNNNNNN2.jpg)
    2.54 MB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:50 No.7017545
    Korpiklaani dwarves. 'Nuff said.

    For those who are unaware, it is Finnish folk metal, which sounds somewhere between Drop Kick Murphy's and Rammstein
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:55 No.7017587
    Nah. The elves are demonish, Lady Gaga is some kind of tentacled penile abomination from outside time.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:55 No.7017590
    Is this drawfaggotry of this?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)18:57 No.7017609
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:01 No.7017648
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:10 No.7017750
    OP: don't make dwarf alcohol be based on the blood of fallen enemies. Make them produice alcohol by *fermenting* the blood. Instead of fermenting yeast, or honey, they can also ferment the blood of fallen enemies.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:35 No.7018044
    fermenting blood because FUCK YOU SCIENCE

    although to be fair this is a fantasy setting
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:36 No.7018064
    Mountain goat biscuits and syrup roasts
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:37 No.7018073

    Aged in hollowed-out bones for that smooth, mellow taste.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/09(Sat)19:38 No.7018088
    See >>7013899
    It's not very good though.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]