Fling the skull probe across the room in the manner most respectful and befitting it's machine spirit.

Get scans of the planet. Check for technology needing repairing.

>>5983250
And then masturbate. And by that I mean recharge my augmatics by plugging directly into the ship. And by that I mean masturbate.

Fap to sisters of battle with my fuckin robot arm

"Skully, the fuck you want?"

Also we are called Moulder, as we work alot with moulds

Turn on Ye X-box and play Ye ODST

Wow. I swear to god if we're a fucking weeaboo animu shit priest...

Get scans of planet.

Jump out the god damned window for startinng a Quest.

Also, I like your art, I'm keeping that.

>>5983250
Feeling vengeful, you pick up the annoying bit of flying bone and decide that it would benefit from a closer relationship with the walls of the battle barge.
With a little help from your mechanical arm you manage to grapple the probe and fling it sprawling (as best a skull probe can sprawl) into the other side of the ships hull.
The crunch as the flying bugger meets the cold metal of the wall has you feeling pretty damn good about yourself. What next?

>>5983327
Feel badly that we might have broken it and immediately see if we can fix any damage to it.

>>5983269
looking over at the giant blue planet out the window, you decide you probably should know something about the damn thing you've been circling above for the last few months
>>5983270
As you plug yourself into the database you take a moment to access some of the porn you had stashed away in the data base. The machine spirit inside of you is pleased.
After cleaning up some of the mess you made on the floor, you find that the planet you're currently orbiting is one of the planets colonized during the dark age of technology.
the population was largely human until a very large band of Orcs came, the planet took a turn for the worst.

>>5983355
A few more scans tell you that Orcs are now the only population on the planet but relics of some powerful technology (which hasn't been looted) remains. Looking back at the skull probe you start to feel a slight pang of regret, maybe you overreacted a bit. You go over and start to see if the damn thing is salvageable. To you surprise the damn thing is still functional, if lodged firmly into the walls of the ship, you attempt to remove it.
The probe floats free and eyes you angrily.
"Feeling a bit more friendly priest?"

>>5983312
Science be damned, you're tired of sitting around and dealing with this flying skulls shit, You take a flying leap towards the windows of the battle barge attempting to break them down and launch yourself into a one man campaign against whatever the fucks down there.
you're body solidly contacts the glass (which is meant to withstand warp travel) and you feel several of your more human parts break.
You might want to look into getting those fixed or replaced.

if we accurate data where the relics are inform the comander of the imperial forces of said relics and that they must be recoverd

>>5983584
>if we HAVE

>>5983547
wait why the hell do we still have human parts? get rid of those usless fleshy things

>>5983584
Picking your aching body off the ground you decide that telling the commander of this Imperial ship where the artifacts of untold power are/might be would be a good turn from your otherwise annoying painful day.
As you march through the winding corridors, faithfully followed by the skull probe you've affectionately named Skully, you begin to wonder... where the fuck is the captain of this ship? a few turns down some corridors and you encounter a very large commissar escorting a troop of grizzled Imperial Guard to some other section of the ship.
what do you do?

You keep trying to throw yourself against the glass, flying through the infinite void of time when the skull probe delivers a message.

"There is a problem, short range scanners have picked up an inco-"

*CLANG*
"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"

Pray to Omissah

>>5983727
ask the commisar in the most polite way, where you can find the meatsack in charge

>>5983732

>>5983693
Feeling disgusted with the pasty bits of flesh that you have left while reminding yourself that you'll need some tools for long term machine replacement later.
This gets you some very sickened looks from the guard that are passing you.
>>5983771
As you're merrily chipping away at the remains of your humanity, you start to utter some prayers to the machine god and for some reason start to add in some good bits about the Omissah. Why the hell not?
The very large commisar catches some of the more choice bits about the heretical dragon god and turns around pulls out his chainsword and starts to close in on you.
Oh. Thats why not.

>>5983774
As the very angry, very large commissar starts to close in on you, you decide to lighten the mood by asking where you can find the meat sack in charge. He doesn't catch the reference and his face turns a lovely rust colored red. As he raises the sword to cut you down he practically spits at you "Any last words HERETIC?"

>>5983857
he dares stike at a tech priest? using the tech YOU FUCKING MADE? pick that fucker up with your bionic arm and tell him to cut that shit out and go on about his day.

>>5983914
'I'm sure this will go over well with the Astartes when they need someone to wake the Dreadnought up in twelve hours.'

>>5983857
>Feeling disgusted with the pasty bits of flesh that you have left you start to peel away some of the skin

Sorry, about that.

>>5983914
would the machine he is going to use to strike you down even fucking work? i mean its not like you spent you whole life praying to the god of machines..... oh wait

>>5983857
But... the Omnissiah is another facet of the Emperor. That's the OPPOSITE of Heresy!

>>5984022
the commissar dosent know that. perhaps you should enlighten him on the glory that is machine give him a new eye

>>5983938
Having seconds to spare you pull the insolent fucker up into the air using the claw on your back designed to lift tanks. You tell the bastard that you're a busy guy and that he should be a little bit more respectful when addressing the man who made his fucking weapons. You've never seen a grown man wet himself. Good times.

>>5984067
ok with that problem cleared away continue to look for the comanding officer to tell him about the relics found on the planet below

>>5984053
You decide to be generous today and go into a well versed lecture about the many facets of the machine god and how what you were praying about might be misconstrued as heretical and how you hope you both learned something today. Then after your done you decide to help him remember this occasion by giving him a new mechanical eye. Your sure he'll thank you eventually. Now... What were you trying to do again?

>>5984126
this>>5984090

>>5984090
Marching along feeling real proud of yourself you stop and realize... Fuck! you forgot to ask for directions.
At which point Skully decides to float on by and ask smugly "You have no idea where you're going do you?"

Information on the ship [we]'re currently on?

POSE WITH A KITTEN CAUSE SHITS BOUT TO GET CUTE.

>>5984168
write a note to instal a mute button on skully
AND OF COURSE I KNOW WHERE IM GOING IM A TECH PRIEST DAMIT

SKULLFUCK!!!!

>>5984172
Deciding to ignore that last comment made by the floating head you mentally connect to the ships archive to learn a little something about the barge you've lived on for the last couple of months. Turns out this particular ship is brand new, freshly created to be used by some Imperial Guard chapter, what interests you most is the incorporation of some very heavy weaponry. Looks like this thing was designed to be used to take on enemy fleets by itself. Some digging and you find the location of the captain and some of his officers. You unplug and smirk at Skully. What now skull?

>>5984296
lol i can just see a priest standing in a empty hall laughing at a deactivated skull probe saying "what now? huh oh yah thats right you cant talk BECAUSE I TURNED YOUR ASS OFF"

>>5984183
You look around... Sadly no kitten to pose with.

>>5984213
you create a mental note file, install mute button on Skully and tell him that a priest always knows where he's going.
>>5984246
You start to feel the mechanical urge to grind up agianst the skull, teach him a thing or to about respect. But right now you've got shit to do.
"Later" you whisper to yourself "Later."

After a few minutes of walking you find yourself in the ships bridge, some very flustered meat-bags are typing way at the ships controls. You immediately register the captain of this vessel as the stout gentleman wearing a very large hat as well as by the array of medals pin to his chest, as you approach the man turns and greets you with a half smile.
"Ah tech priest, what brings you to my humble command center."

>>5984427
remebering how mad the commisar got you keep things civil and you tell him about the locations of sevral relics on the planets surface

>>5984427
tell him that u are sick of waiting and want some actions, also relics

>>5984536
action means machines get damaged and no one wants to see that

[requesting information on the ground forces complement this ship carries; also curious as to whether we can upgrade stuff.]

>>5984470
The captain seems to light up at the mention of the locations of the artifacts, he listens attentively and asks you to input the coordinates into the ships computer. Being the bad ass that you are, you comply with ease, as a holographic map pops up in the control room you see the location of the artifacts pop in yellow, the captain then explains that the red indicates the Orc population. A lot of red shows up on that map. The captain then explains how there are only three plausible landing sites.
The first is to the north, closest to an artifact that looks like the ruins of a ship manufacturing facility.
The second is in the middle of an island next to which is an artifact which scans indicate was a large titan.
The third isn't close to any artifacts but is closer to an enemy Boss Orc's base giving a good chance for driving out the leadership behind the current population.

second one!

We allready got a ship.
If we kill the warlord and a new one will just pop up to replace him eventually.
Having a Titan under our command would be awesome, and a isolated could be easier to hold.

but first, inquere if the ship/fleet have the capability to repair and/or transport a Titan.

>>5984646
well the titan would be awsome but do we have a crew? enoguh time to get it up and running again before the orks overwhelm the position?

that manufacturing facility sounds awsome, could we repurpose it to manufature vehicals for the guard to use against to ork? if so we should set up a base there.

if neither of the two previous options work out go right for the ork warboss and kill him that should give you enough time to get the other two sites working

>>5984536
You quickly shout that you're ready to start killing some of those Emperor damned Greenskins and that it was time to take back some of the artifacts.
>>5984551
Upon some questionable looks from the flight crew, you cough and mention that of course you shouldn't rush into anything, no one wants to do anything stupid that could hurt this very large, very new ship.
>>5984638
after an awkward moment, you ask the captain for the ship manifest to see if exactly what this ship was carrying. Turns out this ships was carrying a very large armor company, including two prototype Baneblades fresh from Mars.
A little more digging finds that the ship has a varied assortment of weapons and gear to attune yourself with all of which is located in an armory not to far away.

>>5984749
pick your self up a weapon just incase, and go inspect the two baneblades

>>5984749
WEPONS, and replace rest of human parts

>>5984646
how large of a titan are we talking here?

>>5983230
I fuck the skull in the eyesocket.

>>5984694
You point to the island next to the titan. Hell yeah, titan.
>>5984716
You explain that it would be easier to hold an island as a invasion point and that killing the Orc boss would only be a temporary solution. You then inquire about the probability of fixing the titan in time for it to prove to be any value during the war.
The captain replies that the ship has a very large crew of some of the Emperors finest Tech Priests and the ship would be able to carry it however, he thinks deeply, The ship wouldn't have the power to fend of an Orc attack and repair it at the same time. But he mentions that the facility at the first point might be able to be redesigned to fix the titan while the ship remained on the defensive.

>>5984732
You ask if the orc horde might be postponed long enough by killing their leader to secure these other bases, The captain shrugs and suggests it's a possibility... but there are already a lot of bosses down there.
You decide to go to the second point.
The captain informs you that it'll be about an hour before the ship lands and tells you to gear up and if you want to attach to an armor company.

orCs?
Tech priest not wearing red?
Battle barge (space marine) orbiting a planet for months?

>>5984872
whats the ground like on the titan island? will it even make sense to bring in armor. also inspect them baneblades damit i want to know whats new with this baneblade designe

Look for the most ridiculously over-sized weaponry we can find and have some lowly private carry it for us. Also if possible grab a chain-sword from the armoury for our mechanical limb. You can never be too careful.

>>5984805
You head to the armory, there are a lot of weapons here, The two most noticeable to you are a Large Lascannon and a Missile launcher. you'll probably only be able to carry one and still be able to move.
>>5984833
You replace all of your squishy bits with cold hard metal. You are a fucking war machine!
>>5984843
Warmonger Class Titan.
>>5984869
You look for that damn skull to give it the fuckin of it's lifetime... Only to find you replaced the organ needed to do that with more metal. Fuck.

>>5984872

Also, land and take out the warboss as quickly as possible. If we're lucky the infighting will last long enough to establish and fortify a defensive position around either or both the manufacturing facility and the titan. Or priority should be the titan however. If it is at all feasible to get it up and running, even getting the onboard defensive weaponry operational may win us the battle.

>>5984919
thats mean, at least replace the privates arms with bionic ones so he can better carry the oversized weapon

>>5984942
Large lascannon and have the aforementioned private carry the battery pack for it.

>>5984942

Rather than skull fuck it, insert the mechanical pseduopenis into any orifice large enough. Perhaps we were to hasty, or perhaps its time to build us some metal bitches. Thats to be decided after the battle.

rolled 69 = 69

>>5984942
strap that lascannon on the opposite side of your bionic arm. also with this new ship that has so many guns on "it could take out enemy fleets by its self" cant we just bomb the shit out of heavily ork infested areas?

>>5984953
Just orbital-barrage the warboss off the map. Land, secure production facility/titan, kick orkish ass.

Are the two baneblade prototypes heretech? I mean, prototype, and all.

Either way, attatch self to landing armor elements, protect the nifty machine spirits.

Getting sleep, keep this up.

>>5984942
Damn.

I turn the skull into a quirky side-kick and go on adventures with it.

>>5985002
makes sound sense. why waste equipment and their precios machine spirits when we can launch orbital bombardments from spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace.

>>5984994 this please

>>5984909
The Island is large enough to to hold the majority of your company and still create a defensible position.
You head down to the holding area for the Baneblades, while there you examine them to see that the biggest improvement would have to be to their size, they're still armored death just... bigger. Decide to have a word with the tech priests of mars about having a little originality later, but for now...
>>5984919
You reach out with your mechanical arm and grapple a near by grunt walking by, you yell at him to go grab your weapons or you'll have his hide to wear over your new mechanical body, you give him a list of all the things you need including a new attachable chainsword. The disgruntled private stutters a "yessir" and zips off to the armory. Alright, still got a few minutes to spare... what now?

alright im out fellows, someone save the results for us weakfags who have to sleep. Also strap a flamer to your other bionic arm to match the large lascannon.

>>5985056
well i guess the comanding officer will be handeling troop deployment so, do we have all of tools and equipment we need for this? get some servitors and what about the other tech priests are they ready?

>>5985039

is it like a mimir?

>>5984955
>>5984960
You run after the private and start to replace him with better mechanical parts, isn't it nice how we're improving the crew already.
>>5984986
Very much noted, mechanical bitches.
>>5984994
After strapping yourself with some newly acquired Lascannon and chainsword and pawning the ammo and extra weaponry off on the private, who seems to have lost some of the flesh on his face during the attachment process leaving some bone uncovered, you inform the captain to bomb the heavily infested Orc areas as you make your decent.
>>5985002
Deciding it would be pretty cool to be a part of some of the toughest fire power around you inform the baneblade company that you'll be leading them into battle.
>>5985039
You reconcile with skully, introduce him to your pack mule.

>>5985110
You decide to take find out how the other Tech Priests are doing... Hopefully they got their shit together on their own. You're beginning to wonder how this company functioned at all without you. Turns out they're doing fine, they're preparing to get the titan fixed as soon as you land, a glance out the window lets you see the battle barge raining fiery death as you descend. Everybody is ready, time to land.

>>5985262
get onboard a drop ship you want to be the first priest to the titan

damit i want to see where this goes but i need sleep can some one archive this once its done?
my favorite part the "discussion" with the commissar, fucking badass

>>5985288
You somehow figure out a way to get one of the baneblades into a drop pod, and aim it strait for the area next to the titan. As the ship descends you're launched from the heavens down into the middle of very large group of very surprised Orcs. They die within the few seconds it takes to fire your guns.
As your impossibly large bane blade rolls from the drop pod you notice that there appears to be a very large Orc artillery piece shooting holes in your new ship.
However the titan is in the opposite direction.

>>5985288
Sorry, drop SHIP, not drop pod. My bad.
Also, sorry for the many spelling errors and plot holes.

>>5985418
breaking...
my
new
shiny
SHIP!?!?!?
FUCKING LIGHT THAT FUCKER UP WITH EVERYTHING WE HAVE

Looks like things have rolled to a close, I'll right this thing off as "To be continued." Hopefully someone will archive it... Not being too presumptuous I hope.

>>5985498
tech priest raeg

bump