Now, the last remnant of the Eldah federation are slowly and calmly disappearing in the comfortable and quite pleasant ennui generated by Lanes. Opposing this dull decadence, the Somber Eldahs seeks to explore more envigorating aspects of life and do some pretty crazy and dangerous things all around the Galaxy, like making their starships go over speed limits or drink all kind of alcohol until being inebriated. To this day, the irresponsibility of the Somber Eldahs is a source of insecurity and unease for the Federation of Personhood.

Across the galaxy the troublesome glaucous-skinned Owgs present a constant problem of integration, due to their contrary nature and their love of opposition, dissent and contradiction, making them difficult partners in all kind of discussions, always moving the goalpost and being gratuitously controversial, going sometime as far as menacing of the use of violence.

In the distance the battle cry "Blood and skulls for da False Emprah WAAAAGH!" echos through the lands of the eastern galaxy. The dark and chaotic empire called the Tau have formed a brutal anarchist clusterfuck utilizing blood magic, genocide, cannibalistic troops, spikes, metal, chaos, pauldrons, undead soldiers in giant robots of doom and guns that shoot little shurikens that kill you and then send you to Hell and then inside the body of someone else who explodes with gore everywhere, just as the norm. The Federation doesn't reject the diplomatic approach, but some controversial politicians have gone as far as to say that they seems to come from another universe.

ITT:

What the year 40,000 AD will actually be like.

Hidden beneath the surface of countless worlds, the immortal Negons awaken to spread the eldritch concept of Greyness. Every planet they visit turns slowly away from the quiet comfort of the Federation to some kind of uneasy and depressing mood, by their constant use of cynicism, sarcasms and someone-esle-problem-ism.

The Cilanids are a vagrant race coming from outside the Galaxy and crossing it in a troubled path, as some components of their hive fleets sometime lands on some occupied planets and try to scavenge the junkyards, take all the things no one else is using right now (but could use later, perhaps) or cleans the streets and lands of all junks without previous discussions and accords with the local garbage disposal organs ; some intolerant bigots go as far as to say they outright steal stuff or try to illegally abuse local welfare.

In the Warp, the Anthropomorphic Personification are the incarnations of emotional states ; Noogle, who tends to complain a lot just to be comforted, or comfort other himself ; Seench, characterization of the urge of displacing things to see if they look better or something, Gown, the chief dis-agreer, always playing devil advocate and trolling forums ; finally, the newest Personification, Lanes, characterization of pleasantness, laziness and irresponsibility.

Across the Imperium not all is well, however. It is a vast empire, and planets fall out of the sight of the Director. Corrupt politicians seek to subvert the Democratic order and ways of the Federation. Egoistic individuals seek to rise up and rebel, annoying their people unpleasantly. Though the Central Government tries as hard as it can without being too intrusive to quietly appease all problems by negotiations and compromise, troubleshooters are needed all across the Galaxy, because, in the world of BeigeHammer 40.000, CONFLICT IS A VERY REAL POSSIBILITY !

This writing fills me with no strong emotion of any type.

I guess I'll take some satisfaction-- no, complacency. I mean, if you have any. I can go either way.

I find this to be mildly interesting, and will hit f5 every half hour or so.

>>5978803
I am intrigued by your opinions and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

>>5978816
it feels like one of those multi-translator thread, exclept instead of russian-japanese-italian-chinese-english we have something like nerdese-startrekese-babylon5ese-starwarese-emglish

The elite Adeptus Administratum consists of genetically engineered troops of bureaucrats, minds and bodies altered with geneseed to allow for a flurry of paperwork filing and writing and an immense numbers to be rapidly worked within the realm of their own minds. Their willpower and resistance to tedium is legendary and stalwart tales of their long resistance to boredom while they file and handle logistics for the people, under the leadership of the Director are somewhat entertaining, being told with some energy throughout.

These of course are the elite of the elite, travelling in massive Filing Frigates to any crisis requiring a massive amount of management and organization on demand; The vast amount of the sheer paperwork is performed by the basic Democratic Servants, the rank and file pen pushers of the republic, armed with only a pencil, laser pointer, and suit and tie.

Read in billy connolly's voice

>The Cilanids are a vagrant race coming from outside the Galaxy and crossing it in a troubled path, as some components of their hive fleets sometime lands on some occupied planets and try to scavenge the junkyards, take all the things no one else is using right now (but could use later, perhaps) or cleans the streets and lands of all junks without previous discussions and accords with the local garbage disposal organs ; some intolerant bigots go as far as to say they outright steal stuff or try to illegally abuse local welfare.

You rang?

And I thought my day couldn't have gotten any better. Thanks for that, OP.

Authoritative Figure Noogle is the characterization of hurt/comfort; he requires attention from all creatures, and give some in return. He is a spreader of minor illness and small hurting that made others have some kind of sympathetic reaction and so it was bad but still kind of nice. His followers tends to hang behind you in the office, whining about hurting teeth or difficulties with invoice, but also listen to all your problems and give you a chocolate or something.

Gown sits on his bar chair of frowned brows, spreading discontent and disagreement all across the galaxy ! He inspires all those people who nitpick for definitions, want to change pre-agreed terms because of stuff and just want you to consider another point of view just for the sake of having an alternative. The meanest of the Personifications, but hs followers insist that, at least, they are not as boring as everyone else, as if it was a positive thing.

Seench, the changer of the way, is perhaps one the oldest and most feared of the Personifications. He is a character of impulses, ideas out of nowhere and sudden inspirations. His followers are unpredictable ! They can wear a red shirt one day and a green one the next, they go cut their hair any day of the week, could suddenly rearrange their cubicle or, in the most extreme cases, can spontaneously add articles of discussion during meeting. Really, their unpredictable nature make Seenchites creatures most feared !

Lanes was created by the constant edonism of the fallen Eldahs and all Eldah soul is claimed to go sit on a conforable couch in its realm. Indulgence in unreasonnable pleasures is the domain of Lanes and It is working its way among Humanity. Speed freaks using modified motorcycles, decadent gourmet salting their meal before tasting them, luxurious perverts saying naghty words in the act of reproduction or irresponsible sloth who read webcomics at work... they are everywhere and ho so pernicious !

The many chapters of the Adeptus Administatrum go by many names, but only a few have risen to great fame though all are pretty much honored and overall considered somewhat important. The Iron Litigators, The Dark Scriveners, and the Ultrabureacrats are among the most respected and efficient Space Aldermen (as they are known colloqially) the universe has ever seen, probably.

Tales of their deeds go far; On the planet of Calabore, the Dark Scriveners have a legend of a Brother-Adept who led a squadron of Administratum deep into the heart of a public healthcare system act, and viciously struck down every piece of legislation they could find, vetoing or adding addendums past the point of utility in order to cause it to be turned down.

Despite their heroism, they were buried in the mound of paperwork, and never heard from again; Their sacrifice would not be in vain, however, because the bill was not passed, somehow dying in committee down the line. Calibore natives recall this sometimes, perhaps telling the story every once and a while.

When a hero of the Adeptus Administratum is disabled too much to continue to push pen and paper but still able to be sustained in life, sometimes they are placed within steel sarcophagi, and attached to mighty machines of legislation called Desknaughts. The Desknaughts are permanently affixed to their cubicles, and massive arms connected to different tools of writing and administration allow them to continue their work. Their dress code consists of a massive shirt and tie, and most wear glasses. (drawfags, we could use a picture of that.)

Space Aldermen are awesome, I kind of daydream the possibility to see one, one day, if there is not much else to do.

Where are the Space Jews?

come on write fags write more

A particular corporation amongst the Democratic Servants that require particular attention : the Commissioners.
Sons of Democratic Servants who gave their life to the Federation of Personhood (and retired with a good pension) and whose education is taken care of by the Democratic Bureaucracy to honor the deeds of their parents (like creating a new form or ehancing a procedure), Commissioners are the next best thing after a Space Alderman in term of efficiency and bureaucracy.
They know all the procedures and forms on the tip of their fingers, they are never afraid to do overtime and they will do everything in their bureaucratic panoply to attain this weeks objectives.
It would be waste to use such brilliant bureaucrat as first line Servants or desk assistant. No, the true means of a Commissioner is Discipline ! The Federative Administration can only work so smoothly and without duress or unexpected movement if everyone is responsible and do its part of the job correctly just as they say in the manual ! And it's the job of the Commissioner to walk the alleys of cubicles to search for signs of carelessness, distraction or even, The Director Forbids ! open disregard for the internal rules. If disorderliness is spotted, the Commissioner is in his rights to require the most strict sanctions, such as negative note in the files of the culprit ; 10 negative notes can bring an observations ; 10 observations bring a blame ; 5 blames bring a retinue on the pay. It's pretty harsh, indeed, but the smoothness of the Federation requires nothing less.

Commissioners are easily spotted by a special tie bar ornamented with the Federative Double-headed Pigeon.
When a Democratic Servant (or, The Director Forbids ! a Space Alderman) goes rogue under the influence of agents of the Anthropomorphic Personification, it's almost traditional to steal the tie bar of the Commissioner...

Taking request (if any) for what to do next...

What are the berzerkers of Khorne in this universe?

Still around, Meuble?

inb4 Peeved Marines

rolled 4, 33, 21, 38, 9, 34, 7 = 146

what about the squats? I want to hear about the squa-

>>5980140

Hooligans of Gown.

These troublemakers relentlessly vandalize the worlds of the Federation, knocking over mailboxes, deflating people's tires and in general upsetting people.

Oh, god, this is gonna be archi-

I meant, eh, this will probably be archived, or something. I mean, it might not. But I think it will. 'course, I've been wrong before. Whatever.

>>5980140
Haaa, the Bullies of Gown ! Interesting subject, indeed !
See, Space Aldermen are working on very hard conditions, having sometime to work for, like 12 hours straight without a pause, just sustained in their effort by their hours and hours of formation, a high trust on the Director and coffee.
So, it's not uncommon that, sometime, they kind of *snap* and fall prey to the Personifications.
And so, we have one of the worst disagreement of the Galaxy : an Emotional Space Alderman. And, when, under some particular circumstances, a whole chapter of the Adeptus Administratum goes irresponsible, we have, well, Chapters of Emotional Space Aldermen. They still nominately obey to the Federation because, well, fun is fun for five minutes, but there are still some responsibilities, guys ! but they don't do it as well as the normal Chapters and will sometime try to interfere in the duty of others, one the most fearsome conflict one can view in this world, sometime requiring administrative judgment to define the lines of demarcation of competences between chapters...

>>5980504

The Bullies of Gown are one of those emotional chapters, and one of the most feared. When their frigates with a bit of red painted around the windows and the door arrives on your planet to rule your disputes and lead your meetings, you know you are in for some unpleasant moments !

They will be extremely aggressive, like shouting "NEXT ! " to the next in the line without greeting or saying hello or anything ! They will sigh heavily when listening to your problems ! They will not say "please" when handing you forms to fill ! They will appear to treat your case with disdain ! Hooo, and this, it's only if you *just* cross their path ! Now, if you actively displease them (and you can't imagine how easy it is ! ), they will go to great length to *gasp* play tricks. Like, blood cubes in your coffee ; firecrackers in your files ; pulling the chair when you sit ! And all this laughing, knowing that you are in their odious, bureaucratically powerful hands ! And they will say "Discontent for the Personification of discontent ! " when you fall in their trap and "Frowned brows for the bar-chair of frowned brows ! " when vigorously stamping your forms !

And the tricks they play on OTHER Space Aldermen... is the stuff of unpleasant stories at the end of diner...

LOL EMPEROR SUCKS

GAY SEX FOR THE GAY SEX GOD

>>5980330
Well, they were those guys, perfectly reasonable citizens of the Federation of Personhood, very quiet, very productives, not the kind to let themselves taken over by their irrational feelings...
But, well, on the last census of population, their forms were mishandled and destroyed before being proceeded. And, as they are not of the argumentative type, they decided to not bother loyal Servants with such a minor problem that will probably be resolved by itself or something.

Last time we heard of them, they tried to signal a problem of massive welfare fraud from the Cilanids, but, well, nothing can be done until their files haven't been retrieved and completed...

archive!

and moar... Tell us about the Democratic Servants! Are they regimented or is it a more informal kind of thing? Instead of lord general is it manager general? or lord manager? heh