DARKNESS

Ask how we can restore Sunbeard.

KICK FATE IN THE FACE FOR LACK OF BEARDLINESS

What was in that chest???

We expected loot. Ask how to restore Sunbeard.

>>4466685
Candy.

Or blood.

BLOOD CANDY.

>>4466685
we expected the glorious resurrection of SUNBEARD.

Also, how is Satan doing? He seemed a bit stressed out with his new job the last time we talked to him.

>>4466685
Something cool.
How can we get Sunbeard back?

>>4466685
Ask why we're in a giant lampshade, how we get out, and make sure to check what was inside the chest.

>>4466685
also, point our your new awesome DRAGON PAULDORONS to Fate so he can admire them.

Shrug and explain that we found Demonsun to be a dick, we are open to any suggestions on how to restore Sunbeard.

>>4466685
Ask him if we're dead again.

>>4466685
Tell Fate we wanted Sunbeard back.
Sundemon was standing in the way of that, so we killed him.
WE WANT SUNBEARD TELL US HOW

Yay! /tg/ is back and with it Dorf Quest. Anyway ask Fate to ask Ra or Satan or whoever to bring back Sunbeard or we'll keep killing all other incarnations of the sun.

/tg/ is up!

>>4466768
But Gnome is down, I betcha.

>>4466695
>>4466710
>Darkness, Loot
"My my, you really are a force of chaos, BB! I'm glad I placed my bets on you."

>How do we restore Sunbeard?
"I came to ask you that very question, actually. What a crazy random happenstance!" He giggles. "Killing the sun is no little thing. We need a replacement sometime soon, before the world dies from the temperature drop."

>>4466745
>Am I dead again?
"Not this time, no. Be thankful, I can only bend a man's fate once."

>>4466770
What, are you joining our party? DO WE GET TO SEE YOUR CHARACTER CARD?!

If not, tell us where to start restoring Sunbeard or fuck off.

>>4466770
OH GOD I DONT WANT TO BE THE SUN NOT ME PLEASE!

>>4466770
Is he trying to seduce us?

>>4466770
Can we resurrect Sunbeard? Surely Ra and Xany and Satan can make some form of alliance and make it so they may bring Sunbeard back to life. Sunbeard was a sentient creature, after all. Xom can help too, if he feels like it. Which he probably won;t.

>>4466790
>Which he probably won't.

You'll never know about him.

>>4466770
Do you know what happened to Sunbeard? If we know the cause of his disappearance maybe we can return him to power. Beardbeard needs to know of Satan's betrayal so he can live up to that Godslayer title again. Maybe ask Musclebeard to help.

>>4466770

Ask about a way to replace the sun.

OUR OWN SUN.

>>4466770
Waaaiiiit a second. Why does Fate have such an active interest in us? Satan, Xom I can understand... but Fate? No good can come of this. He's always been trying to be friendly with us... DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT HE'S UP TO. No bastard is going to manipulate us! For we are Beardbeard Godslayer, and we can slay one more God! Killing a God beats killing the Sun, right?

Tell Fate you're not that kind of dwarf and he should keep his grabby hands to himself.
Also check mountain home.

>>4466801

Dude, he's FATE.

Everything that happens is JUST AS PLANNED for him, we can't kill him unless he wants us to kill him.

Ok, I can see new posts on /tg/ but when I open the thread I only see up to >>4466755 , anyone else have the same problem?

>>4466813
Yes, there might be some server problems left.

>>4466809
You raise a point. But I bet we can make him hurt like hell.

>>4466779
>What, are you joining our party?
"That was the plan, yes."

>>4466783
>OH GOD I DONT WANT TO BE THE SUN
"...I will pretend for your sake you didn't suggest that idea."

>>4466790
>Can we resurrect Sunbeard?
"Why yes, yes we can."

>DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT HE'S UP TO
"Right now, I'm trying to restore the natural order. You just killed the sun. This planet has about 15 minutes before it gets cold enough that things start to die. So, we need to stop talking and start working on getting that sun back, don't you agree?"

>>4466821
15 minutes? I'm guessing that Sunbeard is conveniently close.

>>4466821
What's it going to take?

>>4466821
Dude, you're Fate. Can't you stop time for a bit? Anyway on to this resurrection business, how would we go about doing it? Shouldn't this be more a job for Xany, Satan and Ra?

>>4466821

>What, are you joining our party?
>"That was the plan, yes."

Ok, having a God in our party, that's pretty cool.

Anyway, tell him that resurrecting suns is not our speciality, so better give us a clue.

Also check what's inside the chest.

HOT DAMN I'm glad I woke up early today.

>Shouldn't this be more a job for Xany, Satan and Ra?
"Pelor and Satan, but yes. It should. Sadly, they loathe each other, so I am playing middle man. Lets go do some aggressive negotiations."

>>4466872
Leap into the portal while screaming incoherently with Dorfen Rage!

>>4466872
Intimidate. Act threateningly. Brandish your axe. Mention nonchalantly in the middle of conversation how you killed Glittergold and what kind of a weakling bitch he really was.

>>4466872
Woulda thought Ra and Xany would come into the equation. Xany because resurrection falls under her jurisdiction and Ra because the sun is also part of his territory as seen by the fact that his task involves running away from it. In fact how does Pelor come into it? He's the god of xenophobes and goody goodies, right?

>>4466872
We should probably check the treasure chest before we leave.

>>4466899
I thought we already did.

>>4466906

And what did we find?

>>4466906
If we did, then I want to pause and check our inventory.

>>4466876
>Jump in screaming

>>4466886
Pelor is the god of Light, Satan is the god of Nature. Xany would make sense, except we're not bringing anything back. We have an entirely new sun to make.

>>4466906
You'll have to do that on the way back.

>>4466927
>We have an entirely new sun to make.

Wait, no Sunbeard?

>>4466927
But we want Sunbeard back... Oh well. We'll have to create Sunbeard Mark II.

>>4466927

"Listen fuckheads, I want sunbeard back, and I want him back in 7 minutes!

You'd think fate would have predicted Beardbeard's action and started making a new sun 35 minutes ago.

>>4466927
>an entirely new sun
What faggotry is this? We're bringing back Sunbeard, we owe that ball of glowing hydrogen!

>>4466937
NOW WITH MORE BEARD AND MORE SUN.

Also,

"WHY THE FUCK DO WE EVEN NEED TO NEGOTIATE MOTHERFUCKERS IF EVERYONE DOWN THERE DIES WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO YOU?"

>>4466959
"I did it 35 minu-"

Oh I see what you did there.

>>4466947
>Listen fuckheads, I want sunbeard back, and I want him back in 7 minutes!
Fate: "Well, you heard him. Are you going to argue with the Godslayer?"

Pelor: "Sunbeard already died. He was a failure unworthy of sunhood."
Satan: "He lasted longer than Demonsun."

>>4466988
Whozat in the back?

>>4466988
We could just show Pelor that he is unworthy of his godhood, if you know what I mean.

>>4466988
So we need a new sun, one that is worthy of sunhood.

>>4466988
Look. Sunbeard was awesome. He was like a Dorf. And a sun. Combined. I.. I loved Sunbeard.
If you don't bring him back, I am gonna start cracking heads.

>>4466988
Axe to Pelor's face! Legaxe to balls! CLAIM GOD SHIP OF LIGHT FOR YOURSELF!

Then make a new sunbeard worthy on sunhood.

>>4466988

Oh hai Poseidon, how are you doing?

>>4467003
Not in the safety room.

>>4467006
But it's a goddess?

>>4466988
SLAP Pelor like a bitch and tell him to dare not talk like that about Sunbeard again. Tell him we need a new sun or all his followers will die from cold. And tell him it needs to be Sunbeard as we'll kill any other Sun. And he better fucking understand or another god shall be slain. Shout to emphasize your point, maybe wave your axe menacingly.

>>4467000
>>4467016
>Look. Sunbeard was awesome. He was like a Dorf. And a sun. Combined. I.. I loved Sunbeard. If you don't bring him back, I am gonna start cracking heads.
>It needs to be Sunbeard as we'll kill any other Sun.
They reluctantly concede your point.

>>4467022
Damn right. Inquire as to why Sunbeard disappeared in the first place.

>>4467022
So you ladies want to go get Xany to resurrect Sunbeard? Does Beardbeard know who Xany is? Oh fuck it, screw the fact it could be metagaming.

>>4467041
>Why did Sunbeard go away in the first place?
Satan responds "I had Garrelf kill him" while he works on manifesting the new sun.

>>4467051
Metagaming is Beardbeard's middle name!

>>4467064
In character FKAGAG WHAT THE FUCK?! RAAAAGGGGGEEEEE

>>4467064
WHY

Where did we get all of our mutations from?

>>4467064
So we'll just fix Lamp of Light.

I've got the feeling this will be harder than it sounds. And that Satan won't approve.

>>4467064
Beardbeard develop your "wat" face and demand WHY THE FUCK SATAN DID THAT.

AND THEN VOW TO DESTROY GARRELF.

>>4467064
Hitlist updated

>>4467080
When we drank the Xom ale and worshiped Xom, so from Xom.

March your army to the elven city, THEN RIP AND TEAR!

>>4467101
They will get destroyed. We're better off arming the kobolds with daggers and blowguns so they can assassinate.

>>4467110
Pfft. Just march to the city and demand Garrelf to avoid any bloodshed and war for both sides.

>>4467101
Why would they get destroyed exactly? 200 Dwarves is a pretty powerful force. Also, who says the Kobolds can't be assassigns anyways?

>>4467080
From bad decisions. Go back and read the threads: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Dorf%20Quest

>>4467086
SATAN and GARRELF added to HITLIST

>>4467110
We need Xom modified, land based warcarp

>>4467119
Im not sure that we want to off Satan.
He is a fairly good ally.

>>4467130
We'll put him down as a "maybe".

>>4467119
Boy, I'm glad the gods can't see that.

>>4467133
Yeah, he *is* taking part in the Sunbeard reconstruction. But Garrelf will pay.

>>4467121
Fund it! Maybe we can find a dragon and tame it, riding it into battle. Kobolds are dragonkin, right? Maybe one of them knows one we could talk into/beat into service.

>>4467119
Say hi to Xom then lets go back and check that chest. Then lets find Garrelf and Axe his ass.

Pelor hands you the child Sunbeard. "You'll need to throw him up into the sky."

Fate opens a portal back for you. "You heard him, now get going!"

>>4467130
So along with everyone else?

And while we're on the subject of taking out Garrelf, we need a Waifu to combat his. Perhaps organizing a tournament between the women of our kingdom to find the mightiest and worthiest... so long as they are either not Good aligned and either evil of chaotic neutral.

Plus every King needs a Queen. It's the law.

Ask satan if we are still best buds. And look around for xom...

>>4467101
>>4467118
>>4467115
>>4467110
these ideas all seem to hinge upon us having an army left. We kind of blew up our mountain homes after all.

>>4467177
DAAAWWW.

>>4467177
>Dad?

D'aww.

Get going!

>>4467177
Awesome. We have a Sun Son. Well let's hop to it.

>>4467177
BEARDBEARD, SLAYER OF GODS AND FATHER TO THE SUN

>>4467182
Gnome never said we destroyed the mountainhome, just the peaks of some mountains. The mountainhome might have survived.

>>4467191
The sky looks significantly darker now.

>>4467197
Give Sunson a hug and tell him you're proud of him before launching him into the sky. Tell him you love him. ;_; That's daddy's big boy, lighting up the world. I'll be sure to come and say hi often.

>>4467157
Real kobolds aren't in any way related to dragons. They are dog headed reptile people that rely on stealth and cunning and being able to eat anything. Also, I don't think a dragon would let somebody wearing dragon armor ride them.

>>4467202
Throw Baby Sunbeard into the sky.

Loot chest.

Tally up XP for killing Demonsun.

No one saw his lack of an axefoot.

>>4467202

Take a look at what it's like outside.

>>4467215
Make sure you get a really good windup.

If we had time I'd say toss him from the mountaintop.

>>4467212
>Give Sunson a hug and tell him you're proud of him before launching him into the sky. Tell him you love him. ;_; That's daddy's big boy, lighting up the world. I'll be sure to come and say hi often.
"I'll do my best, daddy! I won't let you down!"

>>4467231
DAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

this is going to end horrible isnt it?

>>4467231
Launch Sunson into the sky
*ADVICEDORF*
become Dorfen Sun God

>>4467231
Definately makes up for the loss of Sunbeard, Gnome. Brb, calling my dad.

>>4467261
IT FUCKING BETTER NOT. THIS IS SACRED TERRITORY GNOME. THE MOST SACRED. YOU DON'T HURT SUNSON EVER!

>>4467275
...
Aldwin really sucks at a Rogue. How did he not find that treasure chest?

>>4467275
OH WOW

>>4467308
Can't have a better legacy than that. Imagine when he's an old Dwarf.
"My son runs the biggest mine in all the nation!"
"Oh yeah? Well my son KEEPS THE FUCKING PLANET ALIVE AND WARM."

>>4467275
Uh, BeardBeard, you need to work on your throwing skill.

And thus did Sunson take his place in the sky, destined to light this world for ages to come.

>>4467332
Sunson: the only sun powered by the most combustible element in existence... love.

>>4467275
Chest chest, and crawl out of hole. Say hi. Wave at Sunson. Throw arm around Aldwin and pronounce loudly that 'THAT'S MAH BOY UP THERE!'

A manly tear falls in pride.

NOW TO LOOT THAT CHEST.

It contains a single large object wrapped in blue silk.

So. Since we're in the Windmill, perhaps we could request Aldwin's help in taking down Garrelf? <meta>As a reward, we could put our entire kingdom at work to help restore Goldmoon.</meta>

>>4467341
That and the souls of virgin women sacrificed to Satan.

>>4467332
>>4467346
THAT'S MAH BOI

Beardbeard, avatar of destruction, senseless violence and utter chaos.

With a baby son.

I...don't know what to say.

>>4467362
Wait! Of course! Now that Beardbeard is here we can use him to get that stick out of Goldmoon's ass! Via the medium of getting laid.

>>4467382
so replace stick with dick. Got it.

>>4467382
Fucking this. I'm sure he won't mind the mutations either.

>>4467382
>>4467384
>>4467389
Beardbeard isn't really that picky about specifics, he'll eagerly hump a calf if you throw a dress on'em.

>>4467361
use silk to create a dashing cape of kinglyness.

Inside the silk wrappings, you find a... um. What.

My new background.

I love you so much Gnome. What is the blue object? Climb out, say hi, give thumbs up to Sunson, ask if they've seen Garrelf.

>>4467361
examine object

>>4467410
What.

>>4467410
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>>4467410
Wat
>>4467403
This! Capes are awesome.

>>4467410
wat

>>4467410
Keep un wrapping!

>>4467410
Who is it? I don't recognize her.

>>4467448
and then use the silk to create cape of kinglyness.

>>4467410
Put it back.

Leave it alone.

When nobody is looking, bury the chest.

THIS. NEVER. HAPPENED.

Wait a sleeping girl in a chest? where have i heard this one before....

>>4467444
THISTHISTHIS

>>4467452
I have a feeling this is what we were going to do to Aldwin that pissed Nemelex off. Maybe we should just leave her alone. Take blue silk for cape though.

Is Fate still in the party? Inquire him about the nature of the object.

>>4467451
>>4467437
>>4467403
You set to work on your cape.

>>4467489
THAT TAIL

IT'S SATAN'S GIRL

>>4467489
SUCCUBUS. You know what that means.
WE HAVE FOUND OUR WAIFU.

>>4467489
Keep ignoring the Deus Ex Love Interest for the Single Character.

>>4467489
oh god ITS SATANS DAUGHTER!

fapfapfapfap.....

>>4467489
Slap demon chick to see if she's awake. If it doesn't work, cop a feel, and then drag her down to Aldwin and the others.

>>4467489
Again, leave it alone. bury it deep in the mountain.

Occasionally come back and leer at its location disturbingly.

You smell something burning.

>>4467489
AW SHIT

I'VE PLAYED THIS SONG AND DANCE BEFORE BOYS

>>4467489
WINGS + TAIL + HOTNESS = SUCCUBUS.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

>>4467516
looks like ol' sunny boy is gonna solve our problems for us! good on ya!

>>4467516
...I think she's melting in the sun light.

DRAG HER INTO THE SHADE.

>>4467516
Wat. Investigate. Feel her forehead.

Oh man does this mean

satan = lord genome?

You have my full attention gnome...

>>4467516
So she likes warmth, being from Hell, but not light. Makes sense. Drag her away from the sun before she gets a sunstroke or something.

>>4467526
OH GOD SAVE HER. SHE'S HOT AND BEARDBEARD NEEDS SOMETHING TO DICK ON A REGULAR BASIS!

Ugh recloak her. dammit...

>>4467516
OH FINE, FORCE US TO ACKNOWLEDGE HER. HELP DON QUIXOTE'S AND SATAN'S LOVE CHILD.

>>4467546
Forget pic?

>>4467526
>>4467545
>>4467551
You drag her into the shade.

>>4467533
Her forehead is warm, but seems fine. I'd be more worried about the lack of skin and bone on the back of her head there.

>>4467581
... vampire?

>>4467581
Cultist can heal her, correct? Preferably without mutations.

>>4467581
Is there still brains?

IF there aint any brains, or if a chunk is missing, she's worthless to us.

>>4467581
Get Cultist. She's right outside, and can heal people!

>>4467581
Curses! It seems our cape based adventures shall have to wait for later. Wrap her up in the silk and bring her to Aldwin for further INVESTIGATIONS.

>>4467581
>>4467592

VAMPIRE SUCCUBUS, marry it or kill it, maybe both.

>>4467581
Wrap her up in your cape and seek medical attention. That bitch owes you a cape and you can't well darn slap someone who is unconscious and enjoy it.

>>4467581
Okay this is going to look really weird, fast. We can't heal and shit so let's go get Cultist from downstairs but only after we finish making and putting on our cape. Priorities.

Recloak her completly and carry her out of there. We get our wicked cape back and buzzard love...

>>4467581

Did we just kill her in her sleep?

At this rate, Beardbeard will be killing something every other minute. Even when he's just standing up.

>>4467614
Sadly, the cape must wait. Let us take her back to Buzzardloved with us. Being underground she should be safe.

>>4467592
>...vampire?
Sure why not.

I assume she can regenerate that. lets not worry about healing at the moment.

Guys, Cultist's healing always involves mutating. And I think we also mutated enough crap for the time being.

Bring her back to the kingdom and see if anyone there knows what to do.

I keep forgetting obvious details today.

>>4467649
Holy shit! Kick her into the sunlight! Kick her! Tell Sunson to shine extra brightly at the mean lady who bit daddy!

>>4467649
Fucking kill it already.

>>4467649
Alright, she's awake, now slap the bitch, TWICE.

>>4467670
AW SHIT

THAT"S OPEN AGRESSION THAT IS

WE NOW HAVE THE LAWFUL RIGHT TO SELF DEFENSE

BRING IT BITCH

WE KILLED THE SUN!

>>4467649
>Vampire Dorf
>Sunson

You asshole. Begin quest to cure vampirism immediately. Nothing else is more important.

>>4467649

...Hm. Dwarven vampires...

>>4467670

Oh no! If we become a Vampire we won't be able to see Sunson! Kick her off quickly!

>>4467691
Oh, and kill it.

But she's just hungry. Beardbeard can handle losing some blood, but our new friend won't survive long without any.

I don't think we need to do anything rash just yet.

>>4467670
enjoi ur mutations, bitch.

>>4467649
You colossal fuck.

>>4467649
FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKK!
PUSH HER OFF! STAB IT IN THE HEART!

>>4467705
Clearly a ploy to make us not see Sunson. Oh why Gnome?! Why do you toy with our emotions? Kill her, search for cure.

>>4467592

I hate you.

>>4467592
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GIVE HIM THE IDEA.

>>4467675
>Kick her!
That seemed to work well.

>>4467735
Take cape and leave casually.

>>4467735

You have two legs, did you know it, Beardbeard? And one of them doesn't involver inmediate death.

>>4467735
Remove heart, throw into sunlight to be sure.
>>4467734
It was obviously a vampire in hindsight. Melting in the sun isn't too common a trait.

>>4467735
Give her some time to think while you run along and fetch Cultist.

>>4467670
Is it time for DORFEN RAGE yet?

Ask her who her master is before we kill her! If we can kill the master we can save ourselves!

>>4467735
Woops. Shake her off your foot into the sunlight. Go downstairs and confront Cultist about your dilemma. She'll know what to do.

>>4467735
"Listen, babe. I'm the king of a mountain full of dorfs and kobolds cowed to the power of my hate and beer. You are exactly the kindof homicidal bitch I am looking for in my life. Come with me and we'll rule the fucking world together."
"Decline and I'll introduce you to my son."

>>4467764
This maybe...

>>4467735
Oops.

Goodbye romantic subplot.

>>4467728
>Clearly a ploy to make us not see Sunson!
I'm not dead, bitches.

>>4467790
Calmly walk out into the sun and figure out where you are.

Wait... a tail?

Can extraplanar creatures become vampires?

>>4467735
Wait. She has boobs. We must un-vampire her.

>>4467783
Sunson is more important than romantic subplot.
>>4467790
Go outside into sunlight then. Take vampire with you to ensure it is dead.

>>4467790
Well, you may not be. But we don't know what contrived requirements were set by Gnome to create a vampire, so we'll just assume the worst.

>>4467790
Thank you, I was afraid you're going to force a anime love story on us.
Make sure it's dead.

Is she still alive?If she is,Tell her that we will spare her life if she becomes our servant. Sexytime servant.

Loot vampire teeth and eyes.

>>4467790
a little voice inside my head is telling me this was goldmoon, post resurrection. i'm really hoping it isn't.

>>4467790
We need a waifu to combat Garrelf. This thing imbedded on our foot is homicidal and has tits. She passes. Get her healed and marry her.
We'll make a billion babies.

>>4467790
Extra wings? Also, autosaging I think

>>4467850
Thats his dragon armor.

>>4467847
yes

Bitch attacked us, kill her dead.

>>4467801
>>4467812
>Figure out where you are, bring vampire
You seem to be inside of a 2 story tower, in a clearing, by a forest. Your new friend is not faring well in the sunlight.

>Autosage
Yeah, I know, but we're going to ride this one for a little longer. I need to eat eventually, yanno.

>>4467834

No, post ressurection Goldmoon is currently a mutated pile of limbs.

>>4467847
>>4467885
Meh.... I think we could find a Dorf Maiden to be our waifu. Then she could drink with us after we slaughter Garrelf.

>>4467918
what? FFFFFF time to go read the archives. i don't even know what i missed.

>>4467909

Let her die, serves her well for attacking the mighty Beardbeard.

>>4467909
Well shit. cover her in the cloak quickly and stuff back in the coffin. She probably knows of a cure if we are infected.

>>4467931
Oh and carry the coffin out back to buzzardloved.

>>4467909
Ok, we're not a vampire. I'm fine then. I think it's been a good session, getting Sunson and all. I look forward to our next session with Beardbeard.

>>4467909
Go to the first story. I thought Beardbeard knew of the windmill? Oh well. Bring melting vampire chick with you. Laugh at her a bit too.

>>4467909
Back in the shade with 'er.

>>4467909

Let her die, laugh while she burns.

Bringing her back to shade would be a bit pointless at this point. Just let her die.

>Just let her die
You equip your brand new blue cape. When you turn back, she is no more.

PAUSE SCREEN
BEARDBEARD GODSLAYER, Dorfen Berserker
Current Quest(s): Conquer Region

ALCOHOLISM: drunk
GOLD: 19,725

STATUS: BBEG

MUTATIONS:
Vestigial Wings
No Left Eye
3rd eye on back
Webbed Hands
Three Breath
Poison Immunity
Scales

INVENTORY:
Iron Axe
+8/+10 Two Handed Axe of the Pit
1 Torch
Overworld Map
Hydra Armor
Stone of Ionus
Wooden Leg
Map to Beardbeard's Kingdom
Golden Sceptre
Antimagic Bird Cage
Dragon Armor
Axfoot
Silk Cape

Party:

Super happy fun doodle time is go!

Ceiling Fate is watching.

Draw the vampire melting like those Gremlins in Gremlins 2.

"Oh, what a world!"

Goddammit you bastards if this really is satans daughter it only means trouble later on.

You'll regret this!

>>4468000
Nice get.

Could you draw the sequence of events leading to a nude vampire in a treasure chest?

I am such a punster.

>>4468009
Or T-1000 melting sequence. Or any other similar movie cliche.

>>4468018
That's creepy. I won't be sleeping well tonight.

>>4468010
>You'll regret this!

Yanno, I see this at the wend of every Beardbeard thread.

Lets see a more detailed look at the cape with a kickass beard emblem.

SUNSON STUFF PLEEEEASSSEE?

Original Sunbeard and Sunson chilling out!

>>4468025
Beardbeard is the BBEG. It wouldn't be right if some do-gooder didn't say he'd regret it.

>>4468063
Cause you tried to eat us, bitch.

>>4468063
Awesome, more nightmares.

>>4468063

That certainly looks painful.

>>4468063
Ah. Hilarious. May I suggest a lot of the gods wailing on Pelor?

Beardbeard: Godslayer, Dragonslayer, Sunslayer. Ruler of the Dorfen Kingdom.

What other epic accomplishments to our name do we have?

>>4468096
Hahaha my new wallpaper.

>>4468110
The most important thing we have done with our life is be Sunson's dad.

>>4468110
Next Quest we should ask more about the gods i.e how they came to be. Pratchett like belief system? And if there is some Creator of the Universe. That we can kill.

>>4468026
You always did do poorly in craftsdorfs class.

>>4468141
Eh, it'll do.

>>4468140
...You mean Gnome? I'm not sure we can kill Gnome. Hey Gnome! Can we kill you?

>>4468141
Looks like what Sunson would have looked like if we droped him.

How are Aldwin and company doing after seeing THE SUN COMING OUT OF THEIR ATTIC?

>>4468015
>Could you draw the sequence of events leading to a nude vampire in a treasure chest?
It was her house. That blue silk was her blanket. She slept in the nude because she was british.

>>4468033
>>4468038
Grandpa just doesn't get it. Clouds have cooties.

>>4468210
Vampires have long naps.

>british.

Didn't you mention there were no countries in this setting? So what kind of a place is this 'Britain'?

So Gnome, are you disappointed you didn't get to do a romantic subplot for Beardbeard? I mean, the girl was cute and had a flower and everything, that was totally what you were trying to get us do.

>>4468248
Wait, so Sunbeard is Beardbeard's father?

MIND BLOWN

Garrelf status update?

or Moradin status update?

>>4468257
That is correct, there are no countries. Britain doesn't exist. There are no indigenous British peoples (or even non-indigenous British peoples).

Except this one vampire. She's British.

>>4468303
So she's British in a way elves are Elvish?

In this setting, vampires are known as Brits!

>>4468311

Let's not get carried away here. He said this girl was British, not that vampires are.

>>4468303

Aw damn it. Would've been cute to see a little romance subplot, if only until Beardbeard kills everything around him. Again.

>>4468303

Except this one vampire. She's British.

SHIT! Beardbeard is going to become... British! The horror!

...

Could you draw it? :3

>>4468210
Well now I feel iffy about killing her.
>Tried to turn us allergic to our son.
Not too much though.

>>4468351
Britbeard!

Draw this!

Also one last thing:
>>4466770
>Am I dead again?
"Not this time, no. Be thankful, I can only bend a man's fate once."

And now I need food, my stomach is imploding. G'day /tg/, and I will strangle moot personally if 4chan doesn't go down again until next Saturday, mid-Quest.

>>4468351
>Could you draw it?
FINE.

Okay, one last thing, because my awesome artist friend is awesome.

And now food.

Lets all cheer for our Legendary class QuestMaster, Gnome.
Hip hip

>>4468466
HUZZAH!

>>4468391

>>Am I dead again?
>"Not this time, no. Be thankful, I can only bend a man's fate once."

Oh shi- So it was FATE who resurrected BeardBeard! That means that BB has been always a pawn in FATE's hands.

...

Well, that's a little obvious, after all.

So what would've happened there with that vampire if she didn't get melted to dust?

>>4468351
It could be her name. She could be CALLED British.

>>4468524
Am I the only one who hopes we get to fight Fate at some point? Just so we can say something along the lines of "You hold no power over me. A dorf makes his own fate, you are not needed. I shall not be played like a pawn. I shall not be thought of as a fool, to be manipulated and toyed with. And you will regret the day you started to play games with the lives of mortals."

>>4468578

Too fancy for Beardbeard.

When a dorf drinks it does not get drunk, the world just gets more sober.

>>4468592
Well something along those lines. But more Dorfy and stuff.

So I'm guessing by the blank party space, we managed to level the mountain homes when the sun exploded then?

Damn.

This is going to be one hell of a resurrection quest.