WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!

Different tripcode. Not Weaver, just a troll.

Yeah weaver would be smart enough to archive his shit.

Weaver'll show up and kick your ass, you know.

>>4160770
No, it's legit.

>>4160788
Oh I wish he would

Would the real Weaver please stand up? And hijack this shit like he did with JohnQuest?

>>4160770
Check suptg, that's the real tripcode.

>THROW BARREL AT IT

whaaattt...

>>4160794
So someone has his tripcode? I don't believe it. Where's it continued from? Why has no-one seen anything lately?

And it's only Thursday in Australia. You're forward by a day, DOPPELGANGER!

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/3431265/

Sweet bleeding shit, it IS him. Though judging by the black post link, he's probably trolling us.

>>4160794
What do you know, it is.

Still, if Tom isn't there alongside Ruby, mostly non-mutated and still in love with her, it's not legit. Stop trolling, Weaver!

D: why u do this to us weaver? we have prayed diligantly for your return and now you troll us? Weaver works in mysterious ways

wait

wait

wait

uh

uh

>>4160828
Weaver was always a dick.

>>4160755

READ THE NOTE!

>>4160828
april fools joke

>>4160803
>THROW BARREL AT IT
No problem for Ace's MONSTROUS PHYSIQUE!

It's April 2.

>>4160845
ZAT IS JOKE!

Looks like trolling. Post number 4158330 was made six hours ago.

Also, I still don't have your Paypal account name. And you need to update your blog.

>>4160844
WHERE'S TOM?

WHAT HAPPENED TO TOM?

SHOW US TOM!

>>4160844
>CONTINUE BARREL THROWING MANEUVER

>>4160853
AND IF HE'S BECOME A MONSTER OR SOMETHING SAD I WILL KILL YOU

Is that an unlit torch on the back wall there?
If that's an unlit torch, grab it.

>>4160844

Turn the torch!

Well, whatever. As long as it's content of some kind.

THROW RUBY

Mario: Save the Princess.

Ace throws the barrel with incredible accuracy. SUCCESS!

Ruby is less than pleased at the result.

>>4160879
You know what must be done.

Explore the dark emptiness!

Well that's a nice huge mess there.

Is it blood or ink?

>>4160879
Tw­o words: SQUID HAT.

>>4160879

TURN THE TORCH

>>4160879
Look, if you don't show us Tom - the one Ruby shared all those earlier adventures with, not Nook - I won't take part in this late April Fools joke.

>>4160889
Assuming he's using his normal color rules, it's ink. Or just xenos guts.

>>4160896
He must be all right, too.

Not this shit again....Weaver, you said it was over.

>>4160879

Take Corpse
Make Calamari
????
Delicious Profit!

>>4160879
What is that behind Ace? It looks like a shield of some kind. If it is, take it.

>>4160755
what the fuck Weaver?

WHAT THE FUCK.

Ruby, get Ace to help you reach that roof hatch.

Also, check inventory.

INV CHECK!

Find maids, rape them.

Also investigate that stuff on the floor, acid burns maybe?

Ruby: scold Ace. Violently.

Ruby expresses her displeasure at Ace's actions.
Ace sheepishly looks around, then, perhaps knowing of no other recourse, flexes.

>>4160927
To me, Ruby Quest was always a love story. It just happened to be set in a creepy laboratory with everyone forgetting everything about themselves.

Show me that Tom is all right.

Ruby: Take a few moments to reflect on the events that have lead up to this situation. Refresh your memory, as it were.

Ace: Continue to flex. Strut around a bit, if necessary.

>>4160927
Ruby: Pull Ace's mask so that it snaps back hard onto his face.

Ruby just can't stay mad at that impressive physique!

Continue through the door to the east.

>>4160914
>>4160916
> INV CHECK!
Ruby checks her satchel and makes sure she is still carrying...
A flask with red liquid.
One bombaberry left.
A small handful of phallic mushrooms.
An oddly-shaped die.
Part of a bone from the bridge guard.
A cluster of blue pebbles.
The Lovecraftian Blunderbuss.

Shoot Ace with the blunderbuss.

Or fail at trying, I don't know.

OPEN DOOR

>>4160942
>GET YE FLASK

>>4160853
>>4160896
>>4160934
>Where's Tom?
Who?

Grind up the bombaberry into gunpowder to use with the pebbles to load the blunderbuss!

Ruby, fill the Lovecraftian Blunderbuss with the rest of your inventory for safe keeping and delicious ballistic hilarity.

>>4160962
YEAH. THAT FUCKING DOES IT. I'M NOT TAKING PART IN THIS FAGGOTRY.

GO FUCK YOURSELF WEAVER. I HATE YOU. YOU CREATED AN AWESOME STORY AND NOW YOU'RE JUST RUBBING IT IN.

Y'know I bet this is just set during that year Ruby and Tom were stuck in here. Ruby doesn't remember because she still has amnesia and hasn't even met Tom since coming out from that coffin.

Why Ace is helping her is beyond me.

I got it.

This is the fabled THURSDAY QUEST!

>>4160962
FINE. Have Ace break down the door on the right.

>>4160960
>GET YE FLASK
You're already carrying ye flask!

>>4160936
>Ruby: Pull Ace's mask so that it snaps back hard onto his face.
It's hard for Ruby to stay mad at the only person she's got on her side, but that was careless! Time for some tough love.

OH GOD, WHAT'S HAPPENING, I AM NOT GOOD WITH COMPUTERS

CHECK MAP

>>4161007
So this IS during the lost year. Ace still hasn't mutated.

If you see a cat, Ruby, his name is Tom, and he's the most important person in your life. Even counting Ace. Remember that.

Everyone in this quest is retarded.

SAME CHARACTERS, NEW CONTINUITY - THIS IS THE SAME CONTINUITY AS MUSHROOM FOREST, RUBY QUEST IS SEPARATE.

>>4160962
wat.

>>4161007
see if standing on Ace's shoulders you can reach that top hatch.

Ace: snap Ruby's panties. :-|

you've spent too long in this room, you must continue.

>THROW BARREL AT TORCH

Find and take any surviving tentacles from the weird monster, maybe we can use it as a rope.

check ahead of you 1st

>>4161007
Examine all objects in the room, namely the Shield/Plaque, Torch, Barrel, and whatever that thing on the floor is.

Inspect the weird-looking spot on the floor.

Get Ace to move the barelly thing below the trapdoor thingy.

>>4161017
>If you see a cat, Ruby, his name is Tom, and he's the most important person in your life.
Are you talking about Ruby's boyfriend Rover?
Of course Ruby knows who that is! She wouldn't be out here in this godforsaken cave in the first place if she weren't trying to rescue him!

Wait. What?

He's back?

>>4161075

THEN LET'S GET TO IT AND SMASH THE DOOR OPEN!

>>4161075
This is awesome.

>>4161075
OH GOD WUT

Manipulate torch on the wall. Why else would it be there if not to be manipulated?! This room appears to be lit by something else!

>>4161075
Well he LOOKS like Tom... Maybe they're the same person. Yeah...

Tom's full name is now Tom Rover! This is canon!

Also, BREAK DOOR.

>>4161017
NOT AT ALL.

This is just some random spin off thing that Weaver started at some point. I don't think it has anything to do with the Metal Glen. They don't even know what that is in this version..

>>4161075
Ruby ignore the voices questioning your own personal life and listen to the ones telling your to do things.

It's not Weaver until he tells us to stop spamming him.

...

*Hopes*

OH MY GOD MY BRAIN.

>>4161075
...

>>4161007

Get Ace to give you a boost up to the hatch in the ceiling.

>>4161089
The door is too sturdy, Ace already tried smashing it open!

>>4161034
>Ace: snap Ruby's panties. :-|
Ruby's used her panties in the slingshot back in the jungle! Ace messing around under her skirt at this point would have DIRE CONSEQUENCES.

>>4161068
> Inspect the weird-looking spot on the floor.
It looks pock-marked, as if from some corrosive substance or burn.

>>4161132
>Ruby's used her panties in the slingshot back in the jungle! Ace messing around under her skirt at this point would have DIRE CONSEQUENCES.

This is AWESOME!

>>4161132
Okay then. Ace: move barrel underneath the trap door thingy in the ceiling.

>>4161132
Ask why Ace wears that mask. Our memory is a little fuzzy.

Ruby: Suckle one of the phallic mushrooms in thought.

>THROW BARREL AT RUBY'S MEMORY!

>>4161132
>DIRE CONSEQUENCES

>>4161140
>move barrel underneath the trap door thingy in the ceiling.
Done.

>>4161165
Lift Ruby up there. DON'T PEEK.

Have Ace get Ruby up into that hole in the ceiling by standing on the barrel.

Unless he breaks the barrel or something.

Do a barrel roll.

>>4161165
Thanks! Um, let's see. It looks too high for Ruby to reach by herself. Get Ace to stand on top of the barrel and hoist Ruby up through the trap door.

I am guessing this is some kind of April's fools joke.

Examine the shield thingo on the wall first, though!

>>4161170
>Lift Ruby up there.
>DON'T PEEK.
Ruby gets as far as the barrel before she decides there is no way she is going to risk it.

>>4161187
I SAW YOU GNOME!

>>4161192
THROW RUBY THREW THE HOLE. STARE UP SKIRT AS SHE FLIES.
DO NOT TAKE YOUR EYES AWAY.

Can they get the shield thing off the wall?

If they can, have Ruby cover herself with it.

...Actually, that sounds like a dumb idea. Whatever.

>>4161192
Well can Ace reach the trapdoor standing on the barrel by himself then?

>>4161192
Lift up the barrel, Ruby and all!

>>4161207
>Well can Ace reach the trapdoor standing on the barrel by himself then?
Probably, but there's no way he could fit through.

>>4161200
>THROW RUBY THREW THE HOLE. STARE UP SKIRT AS SHE FLIES.
Ace can't be controlled directly! Ruby sure isn't going to ask him to do THAT!
She already regrets asking him to throw the barrel, but this is something she knows to be a bad idea ahead of time.

>>4161226
HAVE RUBY THROW ACE UP HOLE. STARE UP SCRUBS AS HE FLIES.
DO NOT TAKE YOUR EYES AWAY.

>>4161226
Have Ace break down the door, then.

Well, if we can't get through the door or the ceiling, perhaps we should check the other exit, considering we've appear to have completely forgotten what was out there.

>>4161226
Stand on Ace's shoulders to get to the hatch that way if he attempts to look up you can stomp on his face.

Eat phallic mushrooms.

>>4161226
Arms above head, knees close to chest!
Brace for impact!

>>4161226
So we need to solve the problem of the free breeze down there. Argh, nothing in inventory to help... Ask Ace to take off his shirt so Ruby can fashion a makeshift nappy.

Is the barrel related to the water cooler?

>>4161226
Use a bombberry on the door.

>THROW BARREL AT DOOR

Open barrel, consume contents.

>>4161241
Ruby hops off the barrel, and she and Ace return to the cave entrance.

>>4161275
What's with her skirt?

>>4161275
Hey look! A creepy dark guy on a spiderweb in the upper corner there!

>>4161275
Retrieve whatever it is that is lodged into the dead thing

>>4161275
Couldn't you open the other door? Open it, go through.

>>4161281
Looks like the back got tucked in accidentally when she hopped down.

>>4161275
Greet spider man.

Sacrifice corpse to web-creature.

>>4161275
Examine room. Try talking to the spider-thing in the corner up there. Be friendly - wave and say 'Hi'.

>>4161302
>>4161236
...Finlay what the hell are you doing here? Go back to being dead!

>>4161302
Rover: Break free of your cage! Beat Finlay up and go find Ruby!

>>4161275
>yellow eyes
>scissors
Hmm.

Take TORCH, apply liberally to SPIDER.

GODDAMN IT WEAVER, YOU... YOU... DOUBLE TROLL!

>>4161239
>>4161286
>The door is too sturdy, Ace already tried smashing it open!

>>4161275
Examine corpse, and see if we can retrieve the arrow in it's head. Also check footprints and see if torch is attached to the wall.

>>4161275
Straighten out your skirt, shameless woman!

So what happened to Rover's eye?

>>4161275
>SCISSORS
>YELLOW EYES
OHHHSHI

>>4161284
The arrow would probably break if it were to be pulled from the creature's skull. It's served its purpose.

>>4161300
> Sacrifice corpse to web-creature.
Ruby drags the body to the corner where the shadowy creature waits, watching intently.

>>4161344
Stab the bastard when he gets careless.

>>4161347
>Straighten out your skirt, shameless woman!

Seriously, you're showing too much leg. Poor Ace will get confused!

>>4161348

No, actually give him a better plan! Always better to play both sides, just in case.

>>4161347
Get out of the way, woman! Don't you know a spider cannot eat while it's being watched?!

>>4161347
Wait, hold on. How the fuck is Ace blushing? It's a fucking mask.

>>4161361
DO NOT QUESTION ME

>>4161358
Rover: Whatever the plan is, it better involve your underwear. Then both you and Ruby are without underpants, and it will be easier to get straight to hot sex when you finally meet!

>>4161361
He's just blushing THAT HARD. You should see under the mask.

>>4161347
Pick up the torch (light and protection) and back away, leaving the corpse for the spider-thing. Tell him it's a peace offering.

>>4161367
Weaver? Stop doing that, it's confusing!

Get torch.

Not this furry bullshit again. Fuck off Weaver.

>>4161382
Gnome, this will be beyond Cultist's Baby. Don't tease us about Rover! He's a good awesome guy, on Ruby's side, who will only use this to get away!

The horrible creature springs from the shadows and lunges towards the corpse offering!

>>4161388
Grab your tits in fear!

>>4161388
Back away. Quickly.

Ask him to open the door for you once he's done eating.

>>4161388
Hi five it.

>>4161388

FFFFFFFFF-

Sit back and watch it devour the corpse.

>>4161390
FUCK YES! TEAR HIM APART LIKE YOUR ALTERNATE UNIVERSE COUNTERPART TOM DID TO FILBERT!

>>4161388
Back away fast! Back, back, back! And make sure you're near an exit!

>>4161388

Brofist the creature.

>>4161388
Watch intently and take notes.

>>4161309
Longest cutscene ever.

Sacrifice spider to Ace.

>>4161409
Pretty faggoty run you got there, Rover.

>>4161401
>Brofist the creature.
Peace agreements are established.

>>4161427
He can climb places, right? Ask him to investigate the hatch!

>>4161427
Does the skirt keep going higher?
Is weaver going to show us dat ass?

>>4161427
... oh. I see how it is.

As the creature his name, where you are, and how to get out.

how did that act at all require you to hike your skirt up MORE?

>>4161427
>Straighten out your skirt, shameless woman!

>Seriously, you're showing too much leg. Poor Ace will get confused!

Rover will be so jealous of you! This might create some nastiness between you two!

>>4161427
AcereactionfacetoDATASS.jpg

Ask your home dawg monster about the door.

>>4161427
Seeing as he can climb on ceilings and shit, ask him to give you a lift up the hatch in the previous room.

>>4161427
Introduce self, and ask for its help in getting past that sealed door.

The creature drags the corpse off into a tunnel in the ceiling, vanishing from sight.
Ruby turns to see Ace making some sort of hand gesture, the kind of movement you'd expect a kid to make to encourage a breeze-carried soap bubble to avoid hitting the ground.

>>4161466
Dat Ace.

>>4161466
Dance along with Ace to hone your DANCING SKILL

Damn it, Ace! Now is not the time for telekinetic tomfoolery!

>>4161466
He's trying to get you to show more leg! That pervert!

...

Use his perversion to encourage him into breaking down that door!

Get Torch, light other torch, see if the door mysteriously opens.

>>4161466
Have Ace reach for what was left behind on the web. If our buddy monster comes back and attack, Ace can surely tank it.

>>4161466
What's that in the web? Investigate!

>>4161466
Inspect item left in webbing!

Looks like the creature left something on its web. Ask Ace to recover it.

Ask Ace to get shit out of that web.

>>4161480
This!

>>4161466
If this is anything like the Legend of Zelda, we need to grab this torch, and use it to light the torch in the other room.

Then, the magic sound plays, and the door opens.

This shit isn't gone?

>>4161481
>>4161483
>>4161487
>>4161489
Ace seems preoccupied, so Ruby grabs the remaining item.

>>4161530
Ruby. You dropped something.
Or your shoe lace is untied.
Which ever one you want to believe, I don't care, just bend over.

>>4161530
Have a deep and meaningful talk with Ace about the birds and the bees.

>>4161530
This is so going to end in rape.

Let's hope Ruby continues not to notice

Roll oddly-shaped die.
Bend over to pick up oddly-shaped die.

Go back to the other room and get the item on wall.

Investigate new item(s).

wait waht

>>4161530
Poor Ace. He knows he has no chance with Ruby, unless...

Unless he got rid of Rover! Then he can have her all for himself!

Ruby, talk with Ace about this, or it will all end in a tradegy!

Ruby recovers the BOMBABERRY DETONATOR CASE.

>>4161567
ACE WAS KIDNAPPER!

>>4161573
Great. Now straighten your skirt.

Then go and solve the classic Zelda puzzle.

Ruby: Whoops! Its odd shape causes you to drop it! bend over and pick it up again.

>>4161573
Them spider people have the darnest things lying about.

Right, now try to open the door.

>>4161573
It looks like Ruby's skirt doesn't have a hole for her tail. I always thought it was just a lazy artist when he never drew tails for his characters, but...

Tom's pants must have been fairly uncomfortable.

Sure is yiff yiff furry yiff up in here.

>>4161593
A tail is like a dick, only on the other side. You don't have a dick hole on your pants now, do you?

>>4161605
I would if my dick was like three feet tall.

>>4161605
Yeah. What, you don't?

>>4161593
I was also beginning to wonder why there was suddenly a tail.

>>4161599
yiff yaff yaff.
And we love it.

>>4161573
Set a bomberry on the door and use the detonator!

>>4161581
Ace watches smugly as Ruby struggles with the wall torch. Perhaps he is acting this way because he tried it earlier, when they discovered it was built into the wall.

>>4161618
Why? We already have a proper way to open it in our knowledge! We can save the bomberry for later.

>>4161599
Really? Because I've yet to see any yiffing in this thread.

>>4161625
Do you have anything flammable? Light it up and use it to light up the other torch.

>>4161629
Ignore the troll.

>>4161605
The hole is there so I can pee out of it.

>>4161625

Follow spider-creature into tunnel!

>>4161616
161616 GET. Good job, me.

>>4161625

Have you tried to, just open it?

>>4161593
You worry about TOM'S pants being uncomfortable? Try FILBERT.

Can we use our blue stones as flint to light the other torch then?

>>4161625

Stand on those footprints to activate SECRET MECHANISM.

>>4161605
>>4161611
>>4161614
>>4161636
This thread is now about dickholes.

>>4161625
Light your DEKU STICK then.

Is that a shelf to the left side of the door? Was there anything on it?

Wait... have we checked for ZOMBY GOASTS yet? This could be a terrible trap!

>>4161647
>Have you tried to, just open it?
Of course! The wooden door is unlocked, and leads into the corridor they just came from!

>>4161668

USE BOMBABERRY ON DOOR
USE DETONATOR

>>4161668
Does Ruby have anything flammable on her person? If so, light it on fire using the torch, then use it to light the torch in the other room.

>>4161668
Do one of these:

a) Ruby stands on a barrel. Ace lifts both barrel AND Ruby to the hatch. This way he can't possibly peek upon her.

b) Light up something using the torch, and then use that something to light up the other torch, to open the door.

>>4161680
Armed and ready.
Time to make like a tree and run.

>>4161668
Oh dear... Ace must be enjoying the view right now...

>>4161668
Again - get Ace to give Ruby his shirt so she can fashion a nappy from it, and then get him to stand on the barrel and boost Ruby through the trap door.

>>4161693
Take cover in the cave!

>>4161693
So I'm a bit confused: What exactly has happened before this thread? I get it that this is some weird alternate reality thing, but I also understand that there's been weird shit like this before as well.

Someone fill up the blanks for me.

>>4161693
Be careful not to trip over your skirt and risk exposing your tail region

>>4161712
A pair of quest writers got high and are having fun drawing whilst giggling madly.

Ruby braces herself on the other side of the door as the bomb goes off.
Ace stands in a manly, confident stock pose.

>>4161720
I got that part. But apparently Weaver did something like this before.

>>4161720
Isn't that how all these start out?

>>4161712
After they have escaped the Metal Glen, Tom got possessed by an evil force from beyond the stars. (thus, he's now 'Rover')
Ace have also escaped, and now he's free from any evil influence. Also, he knew that Tom would get possessed, so he ran ahead to warn Ruby.
Long story short, they were imprisoned together and are now trying to escape.

>>4161721
Ace is to cool to brace himself. Or maybe he's deaf.

Either way, investigate your destruction.

>>4161712
mushrooms, nuff said

>>4161721
Go back in and see what's new!

>>4161729

Here:

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/3753207/

Weaver hijacked a Joan's Quest thread with his Alternate Reality RubyQuest.

This thread is a follow up of that one, apparently.

>>4161740
Holy crap, that was quick.

>>4161738
Also Ruby is pregnant for Tom's kid. He doesn't know of this yet.

>>4161731
Yes.

Door demolished!

>>4161750
That's oooold.

So take a peek. What is there to loot in the next room?

>>4161761
Explore the other side.

>>4161761
Congratulate yourself on a demolishing well done. Much better than that last time something blew up.

>>4161761

What are you waiting for? Go in there and take Ace with you.

>>4161761
Investigate. Carefully.

Have Ace go first, in case someone's going to shoot at us or something.

Ask Ace to come with, go in the next room.

>>4161769

Well, this one is new!

>>4161805
Why would you do that goddamn

>>4161814
For the lulz, of course.

>>4161805
Here, have another of your own pics.

Ace examines the shield locked on the wall. The lock has some sort of prism-shaped recess carved in it.

>>4161832
USE THE DICE ON IT!

>>4161832
Put weird shaped die into the PC-ignored yet plot-important shield.

>>4161841
Actually, I asked that we inspect the shield ages ago...

>>4161838
Ruby returns to the room and wisely sets the prism-shaped die into the lock with the same symbol showing as the one on the shield.
The shield comes free. Something that heavy only Ace could wield, with his MONSTROUS PHYSIQUE!

>>4161859
Let Ace equip the shield and see if there was anything behind it.

>>4161859

Victory pose!

And cross the door already.

>>4161859
Equip shield, hold it ahead both you and Ruby as you investigate through the door.

Ruby and Ace enter the next room, which proves to be rather small. Another sealed door, this one in solid granite, bars their way.
A strange totemic idol stands to their left. Ruby gets the strange feeling she should inspect it.

>>4161882
Inspect totem sensationally.

>>4161882
Have Ace inspect it. He can handle the traps with his MONSTROUS PHYSIQUE.

>>4161859
BOOOGA BOOGA BOOGA!

>>4161882

Kneel down and pray to the totem.

>>4161882
A strange feeling? That doesn't sound dangerous at all! Inspect away.

The totem appears to be of none other than the local Goddess of Pleasure. Some sort of smooth-carved socket has been cut into the face of the idol.
An inscription at the base warns that those who wish to pass must please the Goddess.

>>4161902
OOOOOOOOH

>>4161918

Ohyou.jpg

>>4161918

Ask Ace to kindly please the Goddess.

>>4161918
I think Ace knows how to solve this. Don't peek at him as he inserts his MONSTROUS DONG to the idol's mouth.

>>4161918
Insert phallic looking mushrooms into socket. Slowly. Use tongue.

>>4161918
INSERT PHALLIC MUSHROOM
DO IT NOW

>>4161918

Insert one of the phalic mushrooms in the Goddess mouth.

>>4161934
>>4161935
>>4161939
THIS IS BORING

I'M SURE ACE CAN PLEASE THE GODDESS BETTER THAN SOME STINKING MUSHROOMS

We're autosaging!

>>4161931
>>4161933
>>4161947
You're right! The phallic mushrooms!
What a great idea!

>>4161918
Insert the phallic mushrooms.

>>4161947
Ace doesn't have a dick anymore, remember? It was lost during a painful blumberbus related accident.

>>4161952

Who cares!

>>4161955
*Sigh*

Fine. If you want to be boring.

>>4161963
The thread might suddenly vanish! We'll need a new one soon.

Ruby inserts the mushroom into the warm, strangely moist carved socket in the wooden totem and the door ahead slides open.
Ace doesn't seem as excited about this new development as Ruby.

>>4161955
>>4161918
Haha, oh wow.

Weaver, you card.

>>4161974
AN EMPTY ROOM? IT'S A TRAP!

>>4161974
Tell Ace that he can please the next goddess idol they find.

Get jiggy with it.

>>4161974
Well, obviously. He wanted to use his own mushroom. Maybe after we've saved Rover...

>>4161974
Send Ace ahead into the room, and tell him to CONSTANT VIGILANCE.

>>4161974
Let's move on! We still need to find To...Rover!

A deafening sound booms through the chamber and debris flies as the HORROR suddenly bursts through the wall over the doorway.

>>4162044
...And this is where it ends, right? You bastard.

Anyway, shoot the thing with your blunderbuss.

>>4162044
I FUCKING KNEW IT!
Let Ace handle the heat while you get the fuck out of there

>>4162044

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

SHOOT THE BLUDERBUSS

>>4162044
Ruby: You have a gun. Aggress!

Ace: Do Truffle Shuffle!

>>4162044
Give brofist.

The HORROR blocks the way forward, and its grotesque tendrils seal the doorway shut behind Ruby and Ace! It looks like there's no escape from this menacing Thing That Should Not Be!
It gurgles, preparing to spit acid once more!

>>4162044
ACE TANKS

RUBY SHOOTS WITH BLUNDERBUSS

>>4162066

Shoot the motherfucker!

Shoot it.

>>4162066
Face the Thing That Should Not Be.
*guitar solo*

>>4162066

Run forward through the door! RUN!

>>4162066
Ace, block the acid with your new shield! Oh, and don't get burned in the process.

>shoot acid once more!
>once more
Shit, what did we do last time? Is there anything we know doesn't work?

>>4162066
Sup, ouroboros? How's Wesker doin?

>>4162083
It just spat at the door.

Preparing to breath acid, you say?
Shields up.

>>4162066
Wait, does it have acid blood too?

YOU CAN'T SHOOT IT! IT WILL KILL YOU!

>>4162066

ACE uses shield to cover himself and Ruby.

Ruby shoots the Blunderbuss.

Walk casually through the open door ahead

>>4162082
Ace valiantly throws himself in front of Ruby, brandishing the SHIELD THAT DIDN'T LOOK NEARLY THAT LARGE WHEN HE PICKED IT UP.
Caustic gray acid splashes all around, deflected by Ace's maneuver!

>>4162118
Shoot from behind the shield!

>>4162118
Use this moment of weakness to give Ace a wedgie!

>>4162118
...
Is Ace's mask metal? How.. how does he see through it?

Use Psy-beam.

USE RUBY'S PSYCHIC POWERS!

Honestly, I don't know why no one's suggested this yet.

>>4162118

Now shoot the Blunderbuss! Aim to the bigger eye!

>>4162066
Great. Thanks a lot. Now I have to listen to that song off of S&M, right now.

>>4162162
162162 get? After I got >4161616 ? That's improbable.

>>4162144
>fire Lovecraftian Blunderbuss!

This one's for Stitches.

>>4162177
>Stitches.

Refresh our memory: What happened to him again?

>>4162177
Wait what

>>4162177
Nice sexy bunny teeth you got there Ruby.

>>4162190
He died. More than one time.

>>4162200
What about this adventure?

>>4162204
He died again.

The LOVECRAFTIAN BLUNDERBUSS roars with a power this dimension has never seen before. A righteous fury arcs out of the flared barrel.

>>4162249
Mind the dimensional radiation.

>>4162249
More like righteous Photoshop effects!

>>4162249
FUCK YEAH

The Barbed Wheel has been banished.

>>4162266
PEROGRA!

>>4162266
Move further. Mind the mutations. Be EXTRA CAREFUL.

>>4162266
You know what to do.
Victory dance.

>>4162266
Roll dice to see what you gain from Eye of the Gods table.

(is Ace going to have to duck? This door looks pretty short)

>>4162266
Loot it.

Pose as a team.

Because shit just got real.

Fly to next room.

Suddenly, and with perfect timing, Rover comes bolting into the room, having evidently evaded his captors and been engineering an escape from the other end!

>>4162266
Thank Ace for his brave and bold move and proceed to the next room with him with caution.

If you're feeling extra generous, give him a light kiss on the cheek. Or mask.

>>4162298
....
....
....

FINE. HUG TO^H^H ROVER.

>>4162298

HUGS TIME!

>>4162298
Shoot Rover.

>>4162298
>>4162301
Bah... Rover has to come and ruin everything...

>>4162298
HUG ROVER! KISS HIM!

>>4162298

NOW! POSE AS A TEAM!

You know why.

Ruby hands over the RED ANTIDOTE FLASK and Tom downs it! Made it in time!

Have Ace hug... I think we're calling him Rover.

>>4162322
YES!

SHIT GOT REAL!

WELCOME BACK TOM!

KISS HIM!

>>4162322
As we all remember, Tom is a gentleman. Ask him to borrow his underwear for Ruby to cover herself with.

>>4162322
>Ruby hands over the RED ANTIDOTE FLASK and Tom downs it
>and Tom downs it
>Tom
wat

>>4162337
What would he cover his eye with, then?

Have Tom and Ace fight for Ruby.

>>4162343
So NEITHER of them is wearing their underwear?

...You can't imagine how hot I think this is.

>>4162322
>Tom

I suppose it would be too much to ask for you to actually clear up everything that's happened here, Weaver?

We all knew the blunderbuss would have.. side effects.

>>4162356

Shapeshifters and porno.

>>4162322
HUG ROVER/TOM!

>>4162322
Please let that be a good thing.

>>4162356
>Weaver
>clear up

Damnit people, I need sleep. *sigh* And so I must end my joy early. Alas.

>>4162319
>NOW! POSE AS A TEAM!
Rover is safe, evil has been vanquished, the Barbed Wheel has been broken, the natives have been appeased, and everyone is unharmed.

Fuck
Yes.

>>4162395
I need to finish my stupid essay. Thanks to Weaver, I may never become a lawyer.

>>4162397
Have Rover/Tom grope Ruby, oblivious of her lack of panties. Hilarity ensues.

Also kissing.

>>4162397
DO NOT CROSS!

>>4162405
Butt grab that goes a *little* too far?

>>4162397

Oh, shit, wait wait wait.

EXAMINE SURROUNDINGS WITH THIRD EYE

>>4162397

>>4162412
He was only intending to grab under her skirt, but not under her panties, for maximum embarrasment without going too serious or bad.

>>4162415

Inb4 "What third eye"?

This thread is operating with dangerously low levels of Red.

So uh... nice weather today, don't you think?

>>4162397

Aren't you going to put the closing picture, you know, the ears?

>>4162483
NOT BEFORE KISSING AND GROPING HE WON'T

>>4162405
Who the heck is Rover?

The triumphant team heads home. Time for some much-needed rest and relaxation.
Ruby tells Ace that she and Tom will have to talk to Jay about upgrading their Queen to a California King.

~The End~

>>4162483
That simply means we aren't done yet! Besides, isn't our way out blocked off? Clearly we must continue exploring into the next room!

How many points did we get out of the total?

>>4162504
Ruby, keep going even though your creator is done for the night.

>>4162499
So here we just had Ruby, Tom, and Jay on their new adventure? IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW

BUT THERE WAS NO KISSING. WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING WEAVER?!

>>4162499
Oh, there won't be much rest. Not if Tom has anything to say on the matter.

There will be hot loving throughout the whole night!

>>4162499
>upgrading their Queen to a California King.

Is this some popular culture reference I don't get? It sounds like one.

>>4162525
THEY'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER BED

>>4162504

Here's hoping we don't have to wait until next year 1st April to see more of you.

>>4162543
If you know what I mean.

>>4162543
Preferably on the main continuity, a serious adventure this time. What happened to Ruby and Tom after they got away from the Glen? I want to see!

>>4162554

>>4162511
>Ruby, keep going
♥ Happy April Fanservice's ♥

>>4162575
YES!

That's Tom under her, right?

>>4162575

>>4162575
Wow... I... wasn't expecting...

My night just took a turn for the surreal. I mean, even more so than usual in a Weaver thread.

>>4162575

Odd. The suptg archive thread hasn't seemed to have caught up with this yet.

>>4162627
Oh it will.

>>4162177
RUBY ON RAILS RUBY ON RAILS RUBY ON RAILS

postan in a ruby thread :3

From IRC, more ending poetry for RQ:


<@TG-Weaver> Incense sweet, and cradled warm
<@TG-Weaver> Like lovers coddled, arm in arm
<@TG-Weaver> Two souls, nomadic, fleeing harm:
<@TG-Weaver> That wicked, metal glen.
<@TG-Weaver> Now coming morn drives off the curse
<@TG-Weaver> Too startled still to dare converse
<@TG-Weaver> Both praying they have seen the worst
<@TG-Weaver> So ends their tale --
<@TG-Weaver> Amen.