Inquiring minds also want to know.

I love smoked crab meat.

is that crab smoking? that is the coolest fucking crab ever.

>>3880881

Smoking crabs are fucking awesome.

>>3880890
I was going to troll, saying something about how those poor, defenseless animals are being victimized by our polluting and second-hand smoking ways, but I decided against it, because smoking crabs are awesome.

Ehh, player/gm ratio is fucked up and people prefer the veteran suptg players, that's why you hear so much about the IRCfags, they keep other people from playing.

>>3880882
>>3880881
Is there a story between those two crustaceans or something?

OP here. Love crabs as much as the next guy, but my query remains unanswered.

In return, CRAB PALADIN.

>>3880906

Spoke too soon, then. Any other good hookups exist?

Why are there so many smoking crabs nowadays?

needs moar smoking crustaceans

A majority of the GMs on #suptg usually announce their games in the main channel. The gamelistings are for those who don't have the patience or the bad taste to put up with all the junk that goes on in there. The best way to see if a game is running is to ask in the main channel.

Also, you probably missed this.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/gameview.html?id=172

This offer is open to anyone who's willing to go into the channel and talk to me, but I figured I wouldn't post it because "HURR DURR SUPTG IS A TRIPFAG HANG OUT AND I AM TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL. ANON IS LEGION"

>>3880927

Peer pressure in schools. They get pushed into the habit and then they are hooked for life. Sad story.

ITT: Crabs smoking

>>3880940
become an hero

>>3880927
It's another symptom of the declining moral standards of today's zooplankton. I blame rap music, personally. It teaches larvae to think smoking and knocking down trash cans is "cool."

>>3880940 I AM TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL. ANON IS LEGION

>Mitchell Henderson

Uh huh.

>>3880953

Never mind the issues in today's society where crustacean on crustacean violence is ever increasing due to gang and racial causes. Why can't crabs, prawns, lobsters, and all the other races live in peace?

So sad. I blame drugs for sparking off crime, tensions, and violence.

>>3880957

it's hard to find a good trip in hell

what you wanna fight about it?

>>3880942
Also, with recent school funding cut-backs most schools can't afford basic health education classes to teach these crabs about the long-term dangers of smoking.

>>3880973
The drugs are a symptom, not the cause. They wouldn't HAVE those drugs if it weren't for all the invasive species, like the zebra mus- look, we'd all be better off if we kept to ourselves, wouldn't we?

I think we're forgetting something. While harsh, I belive the minorities, such as shrimp, play a major role in this. Shrimp come from an entirely different society, where bad habits run rife. They move to "our" part of the ocean, and then bring these bad habits here. A harsh, but most likely effective measure would be to curb the immigration.

>>3880940

While your offer is widely appreciated, I must decline, as I have plans for Spring Break.

Also, pic related to >>3880881 and >>3880882

>>3881001
There's always been shrimp, but you're right in that we see more of 'em these days.

Hey, chaps, anybody got a light?

>>3880980
bring it on, faget

>crustacean on crustacean violence

No knowledge of alternate hubs, then...

Anyone got a picture of a crab with a pipe or cigar?

>>3881082

Tragic sign of the times. ;___;

>>3881160

Anon delivers.

>>3881181

Amazing. It's even better than I imagined. Thank you, Anon.

>>3881168

Sneering and whispering and stealing your cars, Reading pornography, smoking cigars!

Crabs! Crabs! ....., ......
Crabs! Crabs! ....., ......

>>3881160
>>3881181

About 3 minutes and a photo of a crab smoking a cigar is delivered. I love the internet.

Y'know, all this talk gets me thinking... what if you had a gangster crab game.

Take a pinch of Redwall, a sprinkling of Mouse Guard, boil it in saltwater and pour in a few cups of Casablanca. Maybe sew some tiny fedoras.

>>3881260 Maybe sew some tiny fedoras.

At this point I fell in love with the idea.

>>3881260
>>3881279
I think this deserves generous amounts of funding

Excuse me, are those crabs just holding the cigarrettes, or are they actually *smoking* them? For some reason that sends shivers down my spine.

>>3881318
I think at least a couple of them are dead and posed like that.

>>3881318

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbfFrVoc-gY

>>3881318

I'm pretty sure crab lungs don't work that way.

It's the thought that counts, though.

>>3881260

Would we also need tiny claw-operated tommy guns, or would they just tear each others' arms and legs off? Also, could see them drinking out of shot glasses.

>>3881318
Crabs instinctively pinch the everloving fuck out of anything their claw meets until they kill it or find something better to pinch. Posing them with cigarettes is easy.

Holy shit. I'm envisioning crabs driving around in black 50's style cars down some street in Little Italy or something, with fedoras and cigarettes. One of the cars stop outside a shop, and the crabs get out their tiny tommy guns, and just shoot until they're out of ammo. Then they drop the guns and speed off into the sunrise, leaving behind spent cartridges and cigarette butts. IT IS GLORIOUS.

>>3881397

Remote-control cars, or is everything just rescaled for crabs?

Ya know what, I think some of them are eating the cigarettes.

>>3881426
Everything rescaled for crabs. That's part of the glory. I would give one of my left ribs to play a campaign like this.

>>3881426
This just became that much more awesome, Imagine one of them steering the car

>>3881363

Crabs and lobsters have gills, but *shhhhh*.

>>3881397
>>3881426
>>3881434

It'd be like that Bugsy Malone movie with the child actors (including a young Jodie Foster) except this time it's crabs!

I think we need to make this a reality

>>3881443

*A car chase is occurring near the edge of a pier.*

"MICKEY! GET THESE COPPERS OFF OUR TAIL!"

"I'm tryin', boss, but these Bandai models have shitty steering! Fuckin' Japs."

"C'mon, Mickey, I ain't hirin' you to - JOE WHAT ARE YOU DOING."

*Joe reaches out the window and snatches a discarded take-out box*

"EAT THIS, YA FUCKIN' FEDS."

*Joe throws the take-out box. The cop car rolls over it with its left wheel and veers to the right, careening over the edge of the dock.*

"Nice job, Joey!"

"Joe, when we get back, we're crackin' open a bottle and throwin' a fuckin' party. That was genius."

"Eh, it was no trouble, boss."

"They say you're the hardest-boiled crab in town."
"Toots, ain't no one going to boil me until I go claws-up. Now quit trying to butter up and tell me what's pinching your panties."

Crawdaddy owns this town, don't try hustling in on his business, else you might find yourself in some real hot water...know what I'm saying?

I fuckin' love you guys sometimes.

I'm hearing all of these; and all of the crabs have sleazy italian american accents. It's fucking gold.

Hired Assassin.

I hope someone is archiving this, because this is fantastic.

>>3881537

>>3881486

Even if we rescale the cars for crabs, there's something that'd be cool about using random pieces of trash as environment/weapons, or stuff like drinking out of shot glasses as in >>3881363

Club Bouncer

>>3881486
>>3881397
>>3881426
>>3881443

How does crab drive facing forward?

>>3881606

Mirrors, or crabs face forward now.

>>3881546
You know the slashers from nWoD? Mantis Shrimps fill the same role.

>>3881546
That's one of those guys who are just fucking insane.

If you hire them to kill a guy, they'll get it done no matter what kind of crustacean it is, but you'll have to deal with the mess afterwards.

>>3881664
"Jesus Christ Mickey, you shoulda seen it.
It was a regular slaughterhouse.
There was shell and caviar everywhere.

That shrimp...He tore them to pieces!
It was a nightmare Mickey...

..Mickey?"

*click*

Since we've mentioned birds here, are there any other urban species who're in on the gangstery?

Maybe mexican crows, or Irish seagulls.

>>3881759
Now the problem is that these guys are obviously the equivalent of rabid dogs. But you can't just kill them off. First of all, trying to fight them face-to-face will end with you being torn apart.

The real problem is that the octopi that run the show find them way too useful to just toss away. If you kill one, you're going to end up with your claspers crunched in a vice, you get me?

OP, have you tried the OpenRPG forums? I found a good game of Mosters and Other Childish Things on the Mayhem server forum-

http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mayhem_Gaming/index.php

>>3881775
No, we've settled on Crustae-Sin City

>>3881786

>>3881775
How about...terns?

:V

>>3881783
No no, Octopi should be ancient evils, ala Cthulhu. They're vastly more intelligent than crabs (magnify this by the same factor you magnify the crab's intelligence for humanoid intellect) and vastly more powerful.

>>3881841
DAMMIT NO

>>3881858
Why the hell do we need ancient evils in a fucking organized crime game?

>>3881895
Because there always needs to be something bigger.

>>3881895

Octopi could be trader/accountants, sitting on fat stacks of cash with a gambler's visor and multiple cash registers.

>>3881933

Wearing those visors and shirts with those garter type things to stop the cuffs moving down.

>>3881933
Much better!

>>3880993
Hi, am immigrant from sea bottom, would like to make statement. Is not fault of crab to smoke; having seen many, are reasonable species. Not easy is life in old home. Have much sharks, bottom feeders, great stress on to live. They only are wanting calm of surface life.

>>3881829
Funny. I wonder if those using this gif actually know what it's from?

>>3882050

A fresh query, if we want to have trash lying around; are humans involved? Is it like Great Mouse Detective, where the two coexist/mirror each other but neither gives a shit about the other?

Also, crabs of different sizes. Problem?

>>3882031
Aren't there a lot LESS predators on the bottom of the ocean? I mean, it's mostly just scavengers down there.

I approve of the crab mafia idea.

Bugsy Malone was the best musical but it needs more crabs.

don't forget hitman monkey

>>3882179

>Also, crabs of different sizes. Problem?

This looks like a good reference.

i'm now trying to stat mafia crabs in a 1920s setting using Unisystem.

there goes my spring break, thanks a lot you guys

>>3882306
We do what we must, because we can.

>>3882306

It's worth it. Crab mafia is awesome. Just imagine those motherfuckers in their sharp suits and smoking cigars.

Like this one but better drawn if anyone has the talent and time: >>3882120

>>3882318

I'm trying to figure out exactly how to go about this. Are we trying to keep things realistic (Crabs can't have Veterinary Medicine!) or are we suspending belief and allowing crabs to shoot guns, be addicted to heroin, and repair getaway vehicles?

Also, I have some ideas for new Skills, Qualities, and Drawbacks. I may have some ideas for "classes" per say, but I don't think that's really going to work.

Give me some ideas here folks.

>>3882347

semi-realistic or at least enough lack of realism so we can have crabs with suits and fedoras and little black cars

>>3882347

First off, I'd use >>3882179 as a size reference for Large, Medium and Small class crabs; shrimp are Small.

Second, guns have horizontal triggers, like a clothespin.

Third, who needs heroin when you have shotglasses of ALCOHOL!

Hired muscle? LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HIM

>>3882374

Awesome.

Alright, I gotta get going, but I'm going to get to work on this as soon as the weekend comes by.

>>3882403

At that size, he'd probably be a bus.

>>3882437
Pardon me while I pick up my masonry excrement.

>>3882403

Fuck it. At that size the crab can keep it if it loves the thing so much. I'm not going to try and grab it back.

>>3882374

Genius. I like how you think.

>>3881537

No

"You're a loose cannon Shrimpy but you make a darn good cop"

>>3882704

>loose cannon
>pistol shrimp

>>3881664
sooo, Mantis Shrimp is Ichi the killer?

This seems appropriate.

Crabs are the most dangerous enemy of mankind on Earth.

Just figured I'd throw some class ideas out for the hell of it

Ripper - Melee based, uses claw enhancements ala Brass Knuckles, but for RIP AND TEAR.

Soldier - (Based on Soldier Crabs) - Offensive, uses hit and run tactics, often travel in squads (Several weak PCs controlled by one player?)

Fiddler - (Based on Fiddler Crabs, herp derp) - Support, buffs, healing, debuffs, etc.

Assassin - (Based on Japanese Spider Crab) - Agile, aims for a 1-hit KO then GTFO.

Don - Intelligent, charismatic, slow, defensive, manipulative.

Thumbnail - (Thumbnail Crab) - Intelligent and stealthy, recon and spying.

Eh, that's all for now. If people care I'll pull some more out of my ass later.

You could make most things that wouldn't have good Dex have Dex penalities. I can just imagine a bunch of crabs with tiny guns blasting the hell out of each other and their surroundings with terrible aim.

Just an idea.

Part of me wants to see this concept get its own game system. I'm already thinking about dropping crustacean versions of Vandemar and Croup from Neverwhere into a crab mafia game.

>>3885502
Sounds good. Fewer hits = More damage per hit = More realistic combat.

Realistic crab fights would be beautiful.

>>3885849
Special attention would need to be paid to grappling rules.

I love all of you so very much. What would lobsters be? Cops?

>>3885139

Not sure about a healing class; if we're going for gangster crabs, we ought to be correlating different gangster roles (Bruiser, Gunman, Talker, Rat) to different species (Lobster, Pistol Shrimp, Fiddler, Ghost Crab?)

And if we made this its own system, it should be almost EXCLUSIVELY grappling, with minor exceptions.