In WarHams, Dryads eat babies and people alike.

It's a marriage bound for failure

Dude, I don't know how to break this to you but;

Your friend needs help... there are no such things as dryads.

I can't imagine what common interest the two share.

"I like sticks"
"I LOVE STICKS"

are dryads even really people? aren't they like soulless automatons?

No, they cannot reproduce, though they can have relations iykwim. Dryads are nature spirits and, even with a physical body, aren't fully equipped as animals.

>>3399721
You know, I had a Warforged Druid a few years back who rode off into the sunset of the Reaches with his Dryad cohort after their final adventure. We just faded to black like an old John Wayne western.

Dryads are manifestations of the natural beauty of a forest, not biological creatures. You may notice that they're "Fey"... this doesn't mean flighty, it means they're not humanoid. So your player's character may love this tree, may get it to return his advances... but in the end, it endures largely unchanged while his character ages and matures and, eventually, dies. The dryad will never really love him, any more than the trees or the rainbows or the wind will.

But maybe that's OK. A battle worn mercenary, tired of war, settles down to grow old surrounded by some of the most beautiful scenery in the world... is it really so bad if the view doesn't love him back? There are worse ways to spend your dotage, and it's better than dying in some filth fever riddled hole with a pig iron orc blade in your gut.

Age gracefully in seclusion, brave warrior. If anyone's earned a peaceful life, you have.

They can have "relations"
Maple syrup.
"'extract', Bok?"
FUCK YOU I'M A HALF-TREE-CHICK
hehehe, I have wood
fuck you I AM wood
etc.

I would make a "got wood?" joke, but it's too easy

>>3399764
Well, THAT was an informative set of quotes. I especially love how even those unfamiliar with the source material can enjoy that material... it certainly isn't a masturbatory regurgitation of inside jokes that contributes nothing!

If she has a nice bottom.

And by "nice" I mean "big."

>>3399760
I don't see where you're getting this "they can't love" thing from. They're spirits, not elementals. They have minds and souls--hell, they're more soul than flesh.

This just reminds me of that one with the Dryad and the Nymph. That was fun.

TREE RAPE

dryad love

>>3399785
Because they're embodiments of the forest, the forest's will. Any love they feel is going to be dramatically different from what a human experiences. They worry about things that bother forests, not things that bother mortals. Asking one to love you is like asking a forest to love you.

Take that away from them, and you've made them into elves with a +2 natural armor bonus and treewalk at will. I know /tg/ loves turning absolutely everything into the same goddamn tsundere girl, (where's Khorne-chan? I'd have thought someone would have made her by now) but can't the very strangest elements of a fantasy world remain somewhat alien?

Besides, it's better for a PC's character to retire surrounded by natural beauty then move into the woods and live with his fuckbudy. Or at least more epic.

>>3399822
"Oh God your face"

>>3399760
That's pretty much what he's going for, yeah. His game age is 70. He's tired of fighting.

>>3399760
>There are worse ways to spend your dotage, and it's better than dying in some filth fever riddled hole with a pig iron orc blade in your gut.

that sounds like an AWESOME way to die actually

>>age is 70.
If he wants kids, tell him he'll need magical assistance and leave it at that

>>3399822
>you're
:(

>>3399822
>You're sap
>You are sap

Who wrote this?

>>3399836

Not if your in an outhouse it's not.

Godamn DM.

>>3399836
IT'S THE WARHAMMER WAY TO DIE.

NONE OF THIS "SUCKING FACE WITH A FIR" NONSENSE. I'LL DIE FROM A DISEASE CONTRACTED IN THE SEWER THANK YOU

dem leaves

>>3399823
I don't know about 'love', but I'm pretty damn sure that there were children between Greek heroes and dryads.

>One of my players has decided its time to stop adventuring and settle down with the Dryad he loves.
>Do you think it could work out?

No, There's the minor problem of the Dryad not being real.

>>3399842

>>3399834
So, what, you're looking for help crafting a suitable retirement for a beloved PC?

Then he retires out in the woods, near a lake. In the mornings he catches fish, in the evenings he checks his traps. He doesn't take more than he needs, and once a month or so he wanderes into town to trade a few pelts for whatever odds and ends he needs about the house. The rest of his time he spends walking the woods, enjoying the fresh air across his skin, or the scent of the earth. Sometimes, he goes weeks without seeing another living person. Sometimes, he catches glimpses of his love darting through the trees Sometimes, the dryad walks by his side. He shares a bed of leaves with her in the spring, and wishes her fond farewells in the autumn, before she sleeps through the winter. They rarely speak, because they understand one another. She'll outlive him, and live on unchanging without him, but that doesn't bother either of them much. They're happy now, something few people can claim in the largely violent world of the average D&D world.

Bam, happier ending than any ten dozen sap puns. And more interesting than any, "And then my character became king of the entire kingdom and make an adamantium tower in the middle of town because he had a small penis and feels like he has to compensate." Sure, it's a little unusual, but someone who wants a conventional romance probably wouldn't date outside of their creature type.

>>3399849
>your
ITT: grammatically failure

Though mortals and gods chased dryads, they never had children; the dryads, nereids, oreads, and other such spirits spontaneously develop from their sources, and thus neither have nor can be children.

On the other hand, obviously they're teh sex, as almost everyone chased them (and Artemis was said to be their matron deity).

>>3399873
This.

>>3399858
Greek fantasy was all about things sticking their dicks into each other. Or killing each other.

Remember at the beginning of the Illiad, when they come across a small noble house? And then they decide that this time, they won't simply invade a house they've never seen before and murder everyone inside, they'll greet them and try to make friends with them? Maybe you didn't read it yourself, but just read about it? Greek Fantasy may have been the basis for a lot of modern fantasy, but it still reads like the very worst of adolescent wish fulfillment, and copying it verbatim tends to make very drab fantasy worlds where the difference between the different races boils down to, basically, the name.

>>3399863
THAT JUST GETS FUCKIN FUNNIER EVERY TIME SOMEONE TELLS IT! ONCE PER THREAD ISN'T ENOUGH! NOR IS TWICE! IT'S NEVER ENOUGH!!

PLEASE! EVERYONE! KEEP THAT TELLING THAT HILARIOUS FUCKING GAG! I AM IN STITCHES!!!!

>>3399889
Zeus. God of gods. Biggest dude of all. Spent all his time trying to bang any pretty girl he saw.

Yeah. Thanks, Greece.

>>3399823
And how does "dramatically different" mean "incapable of love"? You seem to just be saying "they're very strange, so they can't love."

Well, actually, you seem to be saying "I don't want it to be this way because I think it's boring."

Though all the mythology I can think of tends toward the opposite of the conclusion you prefer.

3rd edition D&D, no, though it is possible to be charmed by one. In that regard, it may send false signals or trick you into thinking you're going to have sex with it. The illusion may be powerful enough to convince you that you did have sex with it, even though it was all in your mind.

4th edition is also a no-go. They aren't even intelligent. They're the equivalent of underage roadies, inseperable from whatever group of eladrin, forest animals, or plants they happen to be hanging out with.

That said, I do not oppose elves with natural armor and treestriding. I may have to encorporate that into my latest campaign...

>>3399901
Alright, I see what you're getting at. Pitch a counter thesis, would you?

may you die in bed at the age of 103 shot to death at the hands of a jealous lover

Perhaps I'm just froma different school of gaming, but why do you people always want to fuck, oh I'm sorry "fall in love", with things in RPGs?

>>3399873
This sounds good. I will suggest this to him. This way, when he dies, he can become food for the forest.

>>3399823

Several myths involved dryads falling in love with humans - on of them involved the birth of Hermaphrodite (the deity, not the gender description) when a dryad asked the gods to make her one with her beloved mortal. The nymphs of the pools where Hyacinth was sleeping fell in love with his beauty and he drowned in the pool, where flowers bearing his name sprang up. (Incidentally, this is when Heracles slpit from serving on Odyssus' ship, because Hyacinth was his boytoy.)

So, while they couldn't have children, they sure as hell could have sex and fall in love.

related

Fey are like dragons. They can breed with pretty much anything.

>>3399857

>>3399891
You have no clue how fucking terrifying that scene was at 6.

>>3399909
because /tg/ is perverted and furry, and likes to imagine its not a virgin...there I said it.

Two PCs retired in this way in a modern day setting. Mine was the he, hers was the she. Mine proposed to hers with a 9mm glock for a ring, she accepted.

>>3399931
>dryads are furry

If anything, dryads are walking talking trees.

>>3399920
so's this

>>3399909
Because the other school of role playing is stabbing them.

I mean, sure, maybe some people develop deep, personal connections with the PC's world and their PC winds up involved in the social life of a small town. But I've never seen it happen in any game I've been in... or even a convincing description. It is, and shall remain, our El Dorado.

>>3399907
They're small deities of the land--or land spirits, if you prefer a spirit/god distinction. As such, their concern is all for that which gave them form/brought them into being--their forest. But as soon as they come into contact with outside influences, like all deities, they are able to spare some attention toward matters of the self, and (again, like all deities) they tend toward what we think of as human behaviour, even if taken from an alien view.

Still waiting on someone to cobble together an interesting ending for a more mundane Dryad. You want to humanize her? Fine, sell it! Don't just quote the Greeks, they couldn't write worth shit.

>>3399920
>pamcakes

Actly people in the fantasy world shouldn't be sure whether any species other than their own experience love the same way, due to differences in brain structure and mating habits, even if it's said to the players that they do. Why would a dryad have an emotion of love? Furthermore, she shouldn't be able to know that what she describes as love is in any way similar to the experience of the species of her mate, so if she did say she loves them back, she would in a way be lying.

Loving a tree would be fuckawesome though. I fucking love leaves. Could do with some sappy /34/ now.

>>3399971

Yes, isn't the Dryad named Pam?

>>3399971
You don't call 'em pamcakes sometimes out your way? Huh.

They sure do in Philly.

>>3399984

>>3399979
Ah, but that's what makes the retirement in the forest thing work. Lord knows if they share the same emotions, but they enjoy each other's presence from time to time.

Maybe it's only him who loves her... but for him, it's enough.

And if she really got tired of his presence, she could always sic the bears on him.

>>3399760

Awesome. I just shed a fucking tear.

>>3399979
The same could be said about any two different humans, in the real world. Lets make the simplifying assumption that "if it behaves similarly, it probably thinks and feels similarly", and leave that kind of musing to characters with points in Knowledge: Philosophy.

Dryads are Slaaneshi daemons form the part of Dark Princes kingdom known as the Circle of Vainglory.

>>3399988
Hahahahaha what.

>>3399988
fuck yeah hellboy

>>3400003
Hellboy is a great comic, that's what.

gee it sure is /d/ around here

>>3399997
Can we reverse that, and say, "if it doesn't behave similarly, it probably doesn't think and feel similarly"? Because the dude's a member of a rapidly propagating, biologically produced species that constantly adapts its surroundings to be more comfortable, while the chick's a spontaneously generated living spirit created by nature in areas of natural beauty deep within the wilderness as a protector. You can see the overlap in the... number of limbs, for one. Oh, wait, dryads probably have a few extra of those, what with being trees and all.

>>3400016
what
the
fuck

>>3399988
I can see where the movies got their bizarre sense of humour now.

>>3400017
Why are dryads always humanoid, anyways? Seriously, they're ALWAYS two legged, two footed, one headed, and have two eyes, one nose, and one mouth. Not very tree-like.

>>3400026
Because if they weren't, they'd be ents.

>>3400024
Yeah, Rebis Dungeon is like that.

>>3399997
"If it behaves similarly, it probably thinks and feels similarly" is an outright lie though. There's an infinite number of reasons why a creature might do a thing. A kiss can be love, a ritual, a greeting, lust, deceit, an exchange, a favor, somatosensory exploration, etc.

>>3400026
I like Warcraft Dryads. But that's because I'm a xenophile.

>>3400024
Humanoid Tree Monster-- Dryad.

Non-Humanoid Tree Monster--Treant or Ent.

>>3400030
Not necessarily; they could be centaur-like, or root-worms, or vine-snakes, or humanoid but with flower blossoms where their facial features would have been. So many options.

>>3400046
>centaur-like

See >>3400041

>>3399988
... okay. I'm going to start reading hellboy now.

>>3400065
MOSTLY it's demon hunting and Irish legends. I was expecting more Pamcakes too.

Not to say that it isn't good! Just mind what's on the tin.

>>3400068
>Irish legends

Yeah, why IS Hellboy full of Ireland?

>>3399909

Because we all know heroes and adventurers can be the most detailed in their backstories. Incredibly accurate in their portrayal of emotions, and realistically fallible. But god dammit are you a retard if they realistically want to fall in love and have a family.

Why is the "falls in love, has a family" ending hated when the "dominates the planet, commits genocide" is more indicative of serious psychological problems?

>>3400078
Because everyone wants to be a fucking god.

Falls in love, dominates the planet, commits genocide, has a family.

Not necessarily in that order.

>>3400083
Most people also want to fall in love and have a family, only difference is that's possible in reality.

You are the DM, have Dryads do whatever you want. In the mythology that inspired them though, they did age and die (longer then people kinda like an elf), could have sex with mortals, and some could live without their tree.

Well im pretty sure in 3.5 they can (book of erotic fantasy)

>>3400073
Well, a lot of it is set in Ireland.

Also, Irish legend hasn't been picked over quite as clean as Greek or Christian, so there's more to work with that'll surprise people. Although Akira Toriyama has said he used descriptions of Cuchulain as part of the basis of his Super Sayins. I guess he didn't use the seven fingers on each hand, seven toes on each foot, and seven pupils in each eye?

Yeah, he was doing eye techniques years before those goddamn ninja. Suck on it, Uchiha!

>>3400107
and kids with mortals

>>3400107
Personally, if my GM threw a WC-shaped Dryad at me, I would officially retire on the spot and have lots of sex all day in the middle of a forest.

>>3400118

Don't forget, Cuchulain's Salmon Leap is possibly the world's first recorded special move! (performed F DF B P+K no less)

>>3399941

>>Warcraft Troll
>>Bipedal Dryad (warhammerish?)
>> Well spoken Goblin with hair and a moancle

Which fucking universe is this chucklefuck trying to write in?!

>>3400107
Yeah, yeah, you don't like the embodiment of nature version. But no one's come up with a compelling retirement for this dude with your more mundane Dryad varieties.

Have an ending with a Dryad that requires similar emotions and full biological compatibility with humans, and what do you get by having a dryad instead of a human or elf? Sap and wood jokes, mostly.

OP, be sure to tell us how it goes with the player when you get the chance.

>>3400141
Webcomics

SRSBSNS

>>3400141
>chucklefuck

Who coined this term and why?

>>3400139
He also had the world's first limit break, and the world's first super move: The Warp Spasm. He'd grow super strong, one eye would get huge, one would shrink, and his hair would stand on end. Also, fangs. Then he'd have super speed and strength.

When he WASN'T in this form, he could jump over fortress walls and throw a javelin hard enough to kill three men, so, you know. Shit was so imba.

>>3400159
Cuchulainn is now my new rocks.

"Cuchulainn walks up to you.

5 seconds later, there is a crater."

>>3400159

Throw a javelin hard enough to kill three men, WITH HIS FEET no less.

>>3400159

In his final battle he was mortally wounded so his friends tied him to a pole so he could keep fightan. His enemies were so shit scared of him they only dared approach him after a raven had sat on his shoulder and he hadn't shooed it away. GAR.

>>3400159

Can someone say iron age mary sue?

The Monster Manual for 3rd edition states that Dryads can easily fall in love with mortals such as Elves and Humans, but that their love is so focused and overwhelming that mortals can't ever really return it in the same intensity and that the relationships are often doomed because of that.
It also says that Dryads are a bit stalkerish and will often fall in love with somebody from afar, but I'm not sure how that works if they can't go more than 30 feet from their trees.
In any case, it does - or did in the previous edition - happen.

>>3400165
In his final battle, he was so grievously injured, he had to be tied to a tree, with his guts tied in with rope.

He continued killing people. Fifty corpses later, the enemy gave up trying to sword fight a dying man missing half his guts tied to a tree, and shot him with arrows a few hundred times.

He also killed a dog with a slingstone.

I guess that will lead to... SAPPIC EROTICA?

>>3400156
Dunno. Saw someone call him that and thought it suited him to pathetic t.

>>3400189

Get your coat.

>>3400174
Unapologetically so. The only times he was even remotely troubled were when he had to run a friend through with a spear. He was, and will remain, the best cattle rustler of all time.

>>3400174

probably more a case of "historical reports of cuchulains exploits may have been slightly aggrandized over the generations by the old men telling the tales"

*cough*

>>3399900
You know to be fair if you're already the apex of pretty much everything, you can more or less do whatever the hell you feel like. Zeus knew he was the biggest badass in the universe and so he spent all his time trying to bone people because it's more fun than sitting on top of a big golden throne going HMM YES I AM A GOD I WILL RULE WISELY AND JUSTLY FOR THE NEXT FEW FOREVERS. He's essentially like the drunken college kid who wakes up one day to find out he's the president. Zeus = George W. Bush.

>>3400177
>>3400171

Laststandmind

>>3400189
i lol'd

No banal discussion about fucking trees can stand up to the world's toughest Mick, apparently.

>>3400240

He probably raped some dryads in his day, but this was not awesome enough for people to bother to mention it.

How exactly do wooden creatures work? Do they have soft tissues, or just mechanical wood ball and hinge joints? If they have a mouth, what are the lips made out of? What about saliva? Is it sap, or fruit juice, or nectar? Won't that coagulate or attract flies respectively?

>>3399721
Why exactly would a dryad have such an earthshatteringly huge ass?

>>3400240
yeah, way to kill a thread dudes

........just because you asked.

Imagine, if you will, a dryad. She is standing in a field, near her tree. She turns towards you, but it is a fluid, strange movement. You watche her lift her hand, but her joints do not move. Rather, it is as though you are watching her shift position, watching her body grow into the spaces she wishes to be in. It's like watching claymation, or observing the a slowly moving amoeba or slime mold move in high speed camera. She doesn't move, so much as flow from place to place like a swiftly growing and dissolving plant.....

>>3400306
Because her legs are actually tree-trunks rooted to the ground, so she's bottom heavy in all ways.

>>3400306
Maybe she's an oak.

>>3400306
The technical term is 'trunk'.

>>3400306

To make rich and accomplished adventurers fancy her of course.

>>3400306
Don't know but it makes a nice chair

>>3400141
The FUCK, that's meant to be a fucking goblin? I thought it was a fucking elf or some shit. Why the fuck is a goblin as tall as a dryad and, more importantly, a human?

>>3400348
he's a half-orc/half-elf

an orlf, if you will.

>>3400306
We really need more of this big-bottomed Dryad, drawanon. If you're listening.

>>3400361
This makes FAR more sense.
It's still STUPID, but so is all fantasy and at least it still makes more sense.

I think I remember one, where dryads did "make love" to men, but without concept of sex for pleasure or anything like this. (loyalty - yes. love - wtf is love? sex - technique to extract semen from males to produce youth.)

I'm also afraid the child may really resemble a sapling at first and then a tree for another 300 years or so, before it begins to resemble the parents.

Because no one else posted it!

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/2174098/

>>3400398
So when you impregnate a dryad, she plants a seed?

Guys I bet she likes it hard. First time a tree has given me wood.

>>3399721
Read Book of Erotic Fantasy/Bastards & Bloodlines.
Shut up.

>>3400407
...according to some.

The problem is very few researchers ever returned to tell the tale, not always because they died. But the theory is very plausible - it is said a dryad is born out of a very old tree, but somehow not every old tree will create a dryad.

>>3400407
Yo dawg
Plant my seed in your seed
Etc etc

>>3400414
Yeah I would totally 'stick' it in her.

>>3400414
I'd certainly give her stout trunk a good hammering, if you know what I mean.

>>3400434
Now I'm getting this image of a dryad squatting in the forest somewhere looking very embarrassed as she squeezes out a tree seed the size of an ostrich egg.

>>3399721
Never seen a dryad with branches before. I like it.

>>3400451
I'd help her squeeze it out

>>3400414
Whatever floats your boat, but when it comes to dryads I prefer shaved.

>>3400464
That would be the equivalent of glazed, skinless meat.

>>3400470
That's disturbing.

And somewhat arousing.

>>3400470
SHUSH YOU ARE RUINING THE JOKE

>>3400428
So rude.

>>3400016
Ah Rebis...

What would the world be without you? A lot fucking worse!

>>3400348

You are of course correct to be outraged, because there is only one true continuity anywhere ever.

>>3400451
I'd nail her 'til she's leaking sap if you know what I mean.

My deep sense of wanderlust would stop me from making a dryad anything more then a friend.

Even if her tree was portable, that's no excuse to bring her to places like Dis or outer subnatural planes.

Not even Cukkulan can distract us from our perversions for long.

Why has nobody mentioned this yet?

>>3400517

Have OP's dryad be this variety. Fuck yeah, spending every waking moment having hot sex inside a giant tree!

>>3400517
unless you find a dryad who is an outcast of the dryad society, hates being stuck in one place and longs for far travels.

With some good magic she could get a pair of magic items, assuring a permanent portal (even if the size of a ring gem) between her and the tree.

>>3400524
because she's a slut

>>3400517
A Dryad is the beautiful girl you leave behind.

>>3400544
......but then I'd have to cheat on her

>>3400539
but then I would be stuck with one girl.

>>3400530
Looking at the OP pic, I get a rather different idea of a dryad.

Instead of a nature spirit attached to a particular tree, why not make the tree part of the dryad herself? You end up with something vaguely human, but made of wood and covered in branches and stuff much like the OP. She can wander if she wants to, but must occasionally plant her roots and seek sustenance from the earth. Exposure to sunlight helps greatly.

A dryad kept locked in a dungeon somewhere will grow pale, weak and hungry and eventually starve to death.

What is a dryad?!

>>3400580
A miserable little pile of wood.

Sounds like a sappy end OP

Bump for more dryad junk.

>>3400678
Yeah, I was hoping the story would keep branching out but would you believe it? He wanted to stay rooted.

I even told mah hog n' he didn't believe me.

>>3400678
That joke was funny as shit. I've seriously never heard a joke quite as awesome as that.

Knock on wood

GOD DAMN IT.

Concept: a dryad who won't stop making fucking tree jokes.

Like Rood, but with boobs and leaves.

>>3400755
Or even better, Rood serves as the home tree of a dryad.

o hai

>>3400765
I dunno, I kinda like this "mobile dryad" concept.

>>3400773

Mobile Dryad... Gundam?

Fir fucks sake yew guys, enough with the puns.

>>3400765

I can see them as an NPC team that the players get to meet somewhere (preferably completely unrelated to forests, like in a desert), and who provide the starting lead for a quest or two. If the players can stomach the constant tree-related puns

>>3400790
>>Fir fucks sake yew guys, enough with the puns.
>>fucks sake
lrn2grammar.

That's all I notice that was wrong with this sentence, so I guess that you aren't barking up the wrong tree when it comes to at least trying to post coherently.

>>3400781
This is what Dryads should look like.

She sure has a beautiful lumber arch. I'd plant my seed in her grove if you know what I mean.

Ctrl+F

Splinter

Text not Found.

NOBODY'S MENTIONED HE WILL GET SPLINTERS IN HIS DICK IF HE FUCKS A GODDAMN TREE?

>>3400826
I don't know what you mean.

>>3400844
Rub your hand on some properly polished wood. Do you get a splinter? No.

>>3400844
I think that got lost in the splinter discussion about puns.

>>3399721
Spring Child (pg 49-50 of Bastards and Bloodlines)

>>3400854
I'd like to polish her wood, if you know what I mean.


Wait, what?

>>3400875
FUTA DRYAD

WHAT THE FUCK

>>3400879
Umm... Fund it?

>>3400844
Willy hears ya. Willy don't care.

>>3400889
Just sit on a bedpost. Same result.

>>3400860
I'd like to axe you something. Wood you believe that these puns cut me to the heart? Maybe we should branch out into other puns ash well.

>>3400879
>>3400875
you know it doesn't have to be cock shaped to be polished, you could easily polish something vagina shaped.

>>3400893
I don't own any bed posts as a bed frame would cost extra money. :(

>>3400901
I've never had to polish something wooden shaped like a vagina before.

Do wooden vagina shaped objects exist?

>>3400901
Or boobs or butt shaped. Wood also needs to be oiled occasionally.

>>3400909
Sure, why wouldn't they?

>>3400912
I'd lacquer her.

>>3400913
I've just never seen such a site.

My character went from a Lawful Stupid fighter summoned from a Deck of Many Things to a ridiculously tough and charismatic superfighter with a side of mage, who by the endgame had become CE, helped defeat a minor god and spent the rest of his days in a different plane hanging with his harem of over a dozen eyrines. Good end?

>>3400935
Sounds fucking...

>his

...oh. Damn.

ITT some of the worst puns in the history of mankind.
OP started it though.

I'd pollinate her like a honey bee, if you get what I mean.

>>3400844
Dude. Some like it rough.

>>3400953
You know you love it.

>>3400961
Get covered in powder and then have it fall all over her?

>>3400967
While drinking her nectar. And then later on vomiting it up again and storing it for future food use.

>>3400972
People always forget that honey is bee vomit.

Do fruit tree dryads exist? Would be delicious to eat them out. If you know what I mean.

>>3400317
>>Imagine, if you will, a dryad. She is standing in a field, near her tree. She turns towards you, but it is a fluid, strange movement. You watch her lift her hand, but her joints do not move. Rather, it is as though you are watching her shift position, watching her body grow into the spaces she wishes to be in. It's like watching claymation, or observing the a slowly moving amoeba or slime mold move in high speed camera. She doesn't move, so much as flow from place to place like a swiftly growing and dissolving plant.....

And now imagine her gently caressing your chest, straddling you and engulfing your maleness, then this flow, fluid movement and smooth friction caressing your cock, flowing around it, sticky sap pulling and holding, fresh juices lubricating, smooth touch of leaves, firm grip of hard wood...

ITT: Dendrophilia.

>>3401000
>>3401006
Swap the whole "engulfing my maleness" bit for a bunch of hot dryads eating each other's fruit, if you know what I mean, and you've got a deal.

Bitch didn't tell me she had termites...

>>3401000

If you eat a fruit tree dryad's fruit, would that be like eating aborted fetuses?

>>3401019
She's a vore fetishist?

>>3401013
Holy shit, I just wikipedia'd fruit:
>A fruit tree is a tree bearing fruit — the structures formed by the ripened ovary of a flower containing one or more seeds.

>>3401006

.....that's actually quite hot.

>>3401024
welcome to 6th grade science class, children!

be sure to pay attention, now

>>3401021
They don't reproduce that way, obviously. The fruit is simply for nourishment purposes.

And actually, it'd be more like eating an egg whole.

wouldn't a dryad be a hermaphroditic like a lot of other plants?

>>3401022
No, I imagine it to be a kind of STD for them, and a very easy way to put a guy off of dryads forever.

Better be careful when considering a dryad girlfriend. Some of them never stop vining.

>>3401034
Way to ruin it fuckface.

>>3401035
I dunno, I'm sure there's one or two kinky dryads out there who are both terrified and aroused by the thought of being eaten alive by hundreds of relentless termites.

>>3401034
Dryads impregnating each other. Lunacy.

>>3401037
And she's only really wanting sex in Spring, when the sap starts flowing.

>>3401042
Ruin it? I SAY THEE NAY.

>>3401037
You made me do it, you bastard. You made me use a reaction face.

>>3401034

Depends on what tree she is the spirit of. Like a gingko or a cannabis dryad would not be hermaphroditic. But a pine or oak dryad would be.

>>cannabis dryad

/r/ pic

>>3401055
Okay, a Mary-Jane dryad would be awesome. Always laid back, easily fascinated, likes to lie around in her grove for hours on end, sometimes gets the munchies...

The thread is autosaging now.

Luckily, it's been Archived! Now I'm going to go eat me some pamcaeks.

>>3401068
>Okay, a Mary-Sue dryad would be awesome. Always being better at stuff, learning faster than everybody, likes to lie around with her sparkly satyr boyfriend, sometimes gets the munchkins...

>>3401055
I can picture a Ginkgo Dryad constantly fighting off swarms of chinese herbalists.

>>3401034

I haven't met a mythology where one would.
Dryads are female and in quite a few mythologies they need 'sentient races' males for breeding (in others they are female just by appearance, but factually they are spirits (meaning no breeding), or created from/by trees (worker ants, never breed), or it's an entirely untouched aspect. Dryads definitely have no cocks.

Still, expecting one to behave in a feminine way would be likely too much. They may know all the theory behind human emotions, behaviors and habits and imitate them to achieve their goal (say, all the human mating rituals to obtain the semen), but at times their mistakes at imitating them may seem very creepy.

That is not to say a dryad spending enough time with humans can't pick human-like habits, feelings and values and gain a very human personality. It's just that not many dryads would spend enough time with humans.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plant_sexuality

Relevant to this thread.

>>3401050
Mission successful. Also stay away from the poplar girls.

>>3401076

Sounds like someone's been reading Tales of MU.

>>3401070
No it hasn't been archived you git, it's only been requested.

>>3401103
I did read it for a while, but then it started to creep me out.

A whole lot more than I generally like.

>>3401121
Short synopsis plz?

>>3401055
If there are cannabis and other non-tree plant dryads there are also RAPE DRYADS

Dryads all look female; but in fact most Dryads are actually Hermaphrodite. However, they have no obvious penis... instead, a Dryad will seduce a male of another race. When he orgasms into the female genitalia, the Dryad's sexual reflex will be to push out their male genitalia and attach a packet of semen to the penis currently inside it. This 'packet' will harden on the male penis, and remain on the male when he withdraws.

The human will hopefully have enjoyed his experiance enough to seek out another dryad; and if penetration occurs then the semen 'packet' from the other dryad will dissolve in the vaginal nectar and likely cause impregnation/fruiting.

>>3401136
Girls (mary-sues) going to a school of magic.

In the Demi-human dorm.

LESBIANS

DOMINEERING LESBIANS

EXHIBITIONIST DOMINEERING LESBIANS

"but it's not fappan material ok? ;P"

Delightful theory, I LOLd. Personally, I wouldn't mind.

Excuse my ignorance, what is "Demi-human"?

>>3401169
monster-girls

>>3401169
Something punk-ass humans call anyone who isn't human so that they can feel better 'bout themselves.

*shrug* doesn't sound half-bad...

>>3401146

Humans are the new bees.

>>3401137
venus fly trap dryad.
*shudder*

>>3401177
I always liked the way Banks wrote the Culture series, in that the aliens are always referred to and refer to themselves as humans despite how they're not Earth humans or related in any way. Human is to us a word loaded with emotion. So when playing and writing dwarf-centric settings, you'd probably want to refer to humans as men, homo or hominids, apemen etc, probably not Terrans but anyway a different word and reserve the words human and people to describing dwarfs if you wanted to capture more of the nuances of language and make it more immersive.

>>3401185

More of OP dryad please
PLEASE.

>>3401232
Fourthed for fuck's sake we need more of that junk.

Whenever I see fagots comics I always find myself wishing they'd been drawn by draw anon

>>3401118
Don't really need to say this, but have you ever heard of sup/tg/? As in the archive system that /tg/ uses since it archives stuff immediately?

>>3401464
Yeah, it's been stored now.
Jeez I've never seen a post count like this.

I would also like to sign the petition for Drawanon to draw more badunkadonk dryads.