Drew a picture of a mustachio'd man being knifed by a kid with a cleaver. My teacher had a mustache.

Got caught masturbating

Does that count?

When I was a kid, in my sixth grade, I wrote an alternative ending to a myth of my choice.

I choose Snow White. Snow White dies and her corpse is taken by Spanish pirates and the prince goes on about to save her and then fights the pirates but is about to die when Snow White awakes as a bloodrinking Banshee from HELL and starts ripping and eating the Spanish pirates and finally kills the prince and lives forever after, alone...


... In my sixth grade, my teacher was afraid of me.

>>3271015
I also gave my teacher a home-drawn christmas card with a bunch of stick-figures running through a burning forest of christmas trees with lancaster bombers dropping firebombs on them.

Come to think of it, I'm not surprised they thought I was messed up. And all I had was a legitimate dislike of christmas combined with a legitimate interest in WW2 aviation.

>>3271015

I lol'd a little in my mouth

I drew a comic in class in like 10th grade and the teacher caught me and confiscated it.
I'd drawn lots of comics throughout my school career. It was just my luck that the time I got caught the comic was about a guy trying to commit suicide. I was brought into the counselor's office later, very seriously, and they explained that suicide is never the answer and gave me a hotline to call and told me people were there for me.

I guess they missed the joke of the comic, where the guy attempting suicide is an idiot.
At the end he tries to shoot himself, but misses and kills someone else, and ends up in jail for it.

>>3271033

I also forgot to mention that I did also note, at the end of the composition, that the pirates raped her dead body.
Boo-oo, sue me.

I was in elementary school, and was just starting my obsession with all things world war 2. I was drawing B-17's bombing a city on the ground with chalk when my teacher walked by and made me turn my planes into fish ;_;

Well, I made a cartoon of my physics teacher driving a truck into a bunch of kids. We were learning about momentum.

American Schools sound fucked up.

Do they all have these "counsellor" people?

saging for inferior Cata-chan

Actually, now I think about it, I did lots of fucked up shit in drawing as a kid - talk about agression outlet. I used to plan, in detail, the murder of my english teacher + family. I did this in cartoons, floor plans, etc.

In 5th or 6th grade we had these little daily arithmetic tests. They came on these small strips of paper about the size of a shopping receipt. I always finished them with lots of time to spare, so I drew on the other side. The teacher got really angry about this for some reason. I didn't even draw anything that crazy, just swords and romans and stuff like that.

>>3271112
Yes, god yes. This thread is dredging up decade old memories of rage and tearful masturbation.

I wrote a story based around a battle report of one of my own 40k games.

I got praised for it.

>>3271112
It's not a bad idea, but the implementation is shit. There are some schools that don't grade in red pen anymore because the color makes the kids feel bad. NO SHIT, YOU GOT IT WRONG! I fear for the future in which these pussies run the government.

A teacher once made me change a caption in a picture from "Search and Destroy" to "Search and Capture"

I literally stole a short story out of the Nid Codex and got a 100% for having good amounts of Detail.

Half-Assing shit rocks

>>3271156
>There are some schools that don't grade in red pen anymore because the color makes the kids feel bad

Oh god lol. MAYBE YOU FEEL BAD BECAUSE YOU FAILED

I used to plan world domination on the back of worksheets and promote terrorism as spectator sport in essays. They sent me to the school counsellor and I made up something about sexual frustration. She gave me a pamphlet of safe sex with a condom and that was it.

>>3271168
God practically every piece of "creative writing" I did in high school was a short story I stoled from White Dwarf

People kept finding my fucking porn stash when I was 13 or so and didn't know about things like treucrypt or image-embedded .rars.

My parents thought Magic: the Gathering was some form of occultish magic (oddly, they had nothing against D&D or V:tM).

My sixth grade math teacher got her panties in a bind because she overheard me discussing how modern firearms function in the hall. Heaven forbid a child know how a weapon works.

When I wanted to take home a pair of rubber gloves from the doctor's office when I was 12, my mother assumed that I intended to use them as latex condoms and rape my sister or some other nonsense.

When my dad saw me messing with a needle and some sewing crap at home (I'd been put into a home economics class at that time) he assumed I was "loading them with AIDS" and "putting them on the back of gasoline pumps" like in that fake email. I wasn't allowed to have dinner that night.

I once wrote a delicious fapfic for 40K, but my mother, who had been monitoring my usage of outlook express with her nazi parental controls, got all pissed because I was expressing my creativity in a sexual manner and took the door to my room off of its hinges for six months.

There are more, but I'm kinda lazy.

My parents wouldn't let me play pokemon with people who were over 15 :(

I once had a 40K rulebook or codex, cant remember which, confiscated from me because of the "inappropriate art"

>>3271188

I don't wish to insult you, dear /tg/, but..

... Your family is fucking retarded.

>>3271188
Admit it, you did want to rape your sister.

>>3271216
Aren't they? I grew up in the bible belt. I moved to Chicago when I was 19. Now I come back with a SWAT rifle for Christmas and snipe rednecks from 200 meters.

Come on! Where are the stories about uber-christian teachers confiscating D&D books?

>>3271188
Wow. You're a bit weird, but your parents are pretty well fucked in the head.

>took the door to my room off of its hinges

Oh now it is fucked up when parents wont let kids have doors. Especially if they're in their mid-teens.

That shit ever happened to me I'd just fap in the open till they put it back.

I drew a picture of a particularly bitchy substitute teacher being burned at the stake with jet fuel, thermite, etc.

>>3271204
were you a delicious shota back then?

I think everyone with noko in the email field here is samefag

sage for abundant and transparent samefaggotry

>>3271229

Not from this /tg/, you won't...
Most of my teachers kind of just had the patience or simply just joined in the strange conversations about demonic forces overthrowing the world.
I guess we Eurofags aren't quite what we used to be, back in 1500...

I am sure everyone here had that moment in Childhood where they wanted to murder everything in sight. We are the creative introverted type, and probably were targeted by bullies. We dealt with it in different ways. Some of us ignored it and retreated into our arts. Some of us bulked up and defended ourselves. Some of us, and these are the ones I pity, let it taint them till they became malicious black things with broken hearts. Irregardless of how we coped, we all had our moment of rage, and a few of us here where punished for expressing it in a healthy and cathartic manner.

I fear for the generation to come that is so cowed by the system that they are told releasing their agression through creativity and imagination is evil. They will become like the japanese. The quiet ones who lack the courage to stand up for themselves and eventually snap.

>>3271279
>They will become like the japanese

Sociologically the japanese are pretty screwed.

>>3271188
>When my dad saw me messing with a needle and some sewing crap at home (I'd been put into a home economics class at that time) he assumed I was "loading them with AIDS"
What? First, he thought you had AIDS, and second he can't tell a fucking sewing needle from a hollow needle? What the fuck does he think the syringe's for, looking fancy? Seriously I'm confussled.

>>3271313
Sewing needles as in he is gay.

Gay=AIDS to too many here in America

>>3271313
>he can't tell a fucking sewing needle from a hollow needle
>I'm confussled
Welcome to my childhood, anon.

>>3271277
You sir are a idiot who has never read the faq.
noko is a function just like sage so kindly go and faq yourself.

>>3271277

What'cho talkin' 'boot, Willis?

>>3271313
>he can't tell a fucking sewing needle from a hollow needle?

HOUSEKEEPIN'S FOR THEM WOMEN TYPES, Y'HEAR!

NOW, I HEAR THERE'S A NASCAR RACE ON.....

>>3271277
I say we send a strongly worded email to this "noko@noko.no.ko" fellow. That will sort him!

>>3271279
Ha... My whole life is like this.
In 3rd, I got into a fight with someone and after a few hits, I pushed him down and kicked him in the stomach. I alone got blamed for the fight.
In 4th, I got pushed around on the ice by 3 guys who knew how to skate and I chased them with a 2x6 I found near the rink. I alone got blamed for it.
In 6th, someone had torn up a report I wrote and when I found him, I held him down and chocked him till I got pulled off. I alone was blamed.
In 7th, some large gorilla wouldn't let up on me, so in the middle of class, I went into a tantrum and attacked him with my chair. I alone was blamed.
In 8th, I tackled this bully into girl next to a pile of chairs, after he broke my nose two days before. I alone got blamed for it.

>>3271377
Should'a used a little finesse...

I can get lost for days when reading a good. The worst punishment my parents ever used was taking away the book I was reading at the time, It made some really mundane scenes into cliffhangers of epic proportions.

As for when my hobby got me into trouble, it hasn't happened, when I wrote about an inquisitorial interrogation in creative writting I got an A. Then again there was a 90% main character fatality rate in the stories that people wrote in that class

>>3271377
The next logical step is to shoot up your college/workplace.
You alone will be blamed for it.

a good friend of mine got called into the office in 6th grade, (around 12 years old), the day before he said he was gonna kill someone with a bazooka, (just joking like kids do), they had a police officer pat him down for it.

>>3271377
In 3 years, you are sent to prison on assault charges. One night, as you sleep, a riot breaks out in which 10 prisoners and 3 guards are killed, and dozens are wounded. You alone are blamed.

>>3271418
"Now son, we just need to check you don't have a bazooka on your person. Now I know you think this is funny, but with epic level hide skills these days this is no laughing matter."

>>3271188
Get a vasectomy. Your genes are not meant to be passed on. Goddamn.

I beat the shit out of the school bully and put him in Figure-Four-Panty-Lock in 8th grade after he called me a nerd for having glasses.

>>3271377
You clearly have issues with misdirecting your anger.

>>3271447
No need to worry, I became gay just to spite them.

I wrote a short story about a trooper's last hour of life and I got an A+.

I guess ded soldiers is okay but soldiers killing aliens is thought crime.

>>3271417
No, that is the exit for weaklings, who only prey on innocent bystanders. I have my plans and murder isn't one of them. Besides, why destroy when you can wear it down and wait for it's fall?

>>3271461

Wuss, I called the bully's mother a whore and he began punching my head.
I got a migraine and he got a broken hand.

Seriously, guys, RAGE more and your skulls will grow stronger then METAL.

>>3271495
Metal skulls for the metal skull throne?

Meh, just doesn't sound as good.

>>3271277
Wow.

Just... wow.

>>3271495
I assume you don't know wha ta Figure Four Panty Lock even is.

>>3271495
Punching your head? Like, the top of your skull? What a dumbass.

Told my Grandma about Warp, she later told my parents that I shouldn't learn about witchcraft ........

>>3271527

If you say it in that tone, I guess I'm too scared to know.

>>3271533

Actually, the temples.

teachers loved me in elementary school and hated me in high school. i was a smart ass.
"if you dont do this homework youll never be good at english"
"so teacher did you ever read beowulf, hagakure, or the art of war?"
"no i havent"
"i read those books in six grade, why exactly are you teaching me how to read with shit like lord of the flies again?"
"thats an office referal and a saturday school"

>>3271587
Odd, I thought knowing how to read would also teach you how to write.

>>3271587
Yes, but in the greater scheme of things, outside of diminituve school universe and authority non-arguments, you were right.

>>3271551
YOUR GRANDMA FAILED TO HAND HER OVER YOU TO THE HOLY INQUISITION FOR PROPER ATONEMENT FOR HERETICAL CRIME OF WITCHCRAFT AND CONSORTING WITH WARP BEASTS

>>3271204
If I had kids, I wouldn't let them near anyone who was over 15 and still playing pokemon either.

>>3271593
well yeah. but i did a lot of stupid shit to make that point in school i shouldnt have. i was late like 22 times sophomore year, never did my homework, and routinely slept in class. now that ive grown up i get along great with my college teachers.

When have my passtimes got me in trouble?

The main one was when I DM'd MaidRPG over the Internets. Unbeknownst to me, one of my players was a thirteen year old girl who surfed the RPG site I was hosting on and thought it sounded funny.

Got scared when a player graphically tried to convince her to blow him, told her parents. I got put on some Internet Evangelist site and recieved some death threats through my email (which I posted if the players needed to talk to me).

That was crap. I still play Maid though.

I frequent /d/.
'Nuff said...

I wrote a story in english class about some Blood Angels preparing for battle, before I knew what the excersize was. We had to pass it on for three other people to write the rest of. Luckly, out of some random chance, the guy next to me happened to like warhammer and wrote it but changed it to Blood Ravens. Then the other two people had to write and well.

Uh, it was interresting at least.

>>3271646
Sauce?

>>3271655
Do you go on /co/? There was a huge thread just yesterday about how we've got to arm ourselves for when the man decides we're pedophiles because the japanese draw everyone underage looking.

I went to a bullshit hippie art school.
One time we had to come up with a "plan to stop the war", so I drew an imperial titan cannon with US ARMY stenciled on the side.

>>3271675
If by 'yesterday' you mean, a few hours ago, then yes.

>>3271615
I sucked up, kissed ass, and basically acquired the skills I need to succeed in the workplace by showing up for work 15 hours a week and collecting paychecks for 40 while everyone raves about what an awesome job I'm doing.

(The sad thing is, I do more actually work in those 15 hours than many people in that office do with an entire work week)

>>3271646
wait so your play did this but you got blamed?

I had a friend who, when asked to write an essay on allieviating world hunger advocated the systematic genocide of all African people. Noting that as a side effect that he'd have drastically cut down the world's AIDs per head ratio. It was meticulously written and researched. Got him suspended for a week.

Best I ever did was rip the entire endgame to First & Only for GCSE coursework, got an A+

>>3271689

Yep. Awesome, huh.

And someone asked for the source? One of the group members (Jesus, probably) had them remove the game, so I can't give a link. Just comes up with 404s

my life went like this.
kindergarten- got yelled at for having star trek toys in my back pack.
1st grade-brought a model B-52 id built to show and tell, left my bookbag on the floor and someone stepped on it. discovered the joy that is computers, and more specifically marathon for mac.

2nd grade-decided the nazis were right, obsessively read encyclopedias on world war 2 history. was first person picked for my schools bullshit gifted program.

3rd grade-second third grader to ever win the school spelling bee, couldnt go anywhere for the next month without being asked how to spell supercalafragileisticexbealadoscious. accidently left a cap gun in my back pack after me and a friend had been playing downed pilots in his back yard. this was a week after columbine.

4th grade-drew pictures of banshees, obelisks of light, and cyborg commandos for art class.

5th grade-homeschooled, became weeaboo. ironically only interested in old school japan, nothing before 1800.

6th grade-continue weeabooness, get into 40k. win xbox after spending 7 dollars on raffel tickets. by the time i was 12 i had been both a nazi and a weeaboo.

10th grade-did horrible in school. got laid for the first time while my mom was in the other room. talk about a quickie. no condom first time.

>So when has your hobby of choice got you into trouble, especially with over concerned adults.

Drawing. My rendition of the Marines shooting Jappos on my second grade folders was too much for my teacher (I had just seen sands of iwo jima at the time).

had to write stoies in english, around age 12, wrote a prologue to the hero from doom approaching his fate, having found one of the portals the daemons used to come to mars and taking it back to hell
they didn't like that much

When i first got into DND back in like 8th grade. I got pulled into the office for having "Gang Related Paraphernalia."

All i had was the three core books, some dice, and my DM note book.

>>3271772

Basic Fighta 4 lyfe, yo.

When I was bored, I used to make little metal people out of paper clips, pins, and other snips of wire. Sometimes i'd drop them on my floor, and they'd get trapped in the carpet. My parents thought I was trying to maliciously booby trap my room so your feet got hurt. I was 12, by the way, and very confused when they asked me if I liked to see people get hurt.

>>3271862

This reminds me of the time I used to get some colored cloth clips and one brand was the Power Puff Girls and the other brand was the Rowdy (wazzat it?) Rough Boys and then I'd imagine them as adults, making sex.

Writing. I've always wanted to be a writer and I was very morbid and EDGY in 11th grade (not to mention lonely as fuck although that hasn't changed HA HA HA oh god i hate my life) and I got into trouble for writing about people being torn apart and jokingly making "revenge lists" for imagined slights. I had to go to a therapist for three sessions (although I later came back to her on my own, fat lot of good that did) but I've been too embarassed to write ever since.

It doesn't help that I go back and look at how embarassingly bad my fiction was back then. Now I can't get more than a half page down before I delete it because I somehow know that it will suck. I get no practice because I've no confidence in myself.

(I did once write about a group of adventurers as a dialogue exercise, that came out okay.)

>>3271929
dude just practice. its like everything else you have to start somewhere and know where you stand. the worse that happens is you waste some time, and your doing that cruising 4chan right now.

>>3271707
Hey, at least you got laid. I'm 22 and I'm so fucked up I can hardly talk to people outside of small talk with a cashier.

2nd grade I had a really, well, "liberal" teacher. She called my parents because I used the phrase "da bomb" in a paper describing my class experience that year. She also called my parents when I made the gun shape with my finger. From sixth grade up, I had gotten in a fight every year, all of them started by bullies who thought they could push me around. Also, I got a detention for "hacking with a school computer" in sixth grade, when all I did was log in as my friend and leave messages in his student accound folder in the form of document titles. And there was this one time where my friends and I were pushing eachother around in the halls, and a teacher stopped us and told us to go to the office because someone could have gotten hurt. So without thinking I started being a smartass, arguing that we shouldnt get punished for something that COULD have happened, and by the end of it I was the only one that got in trouble. And then theres the classic "know more than the teacher" scenario. Like we were talking about vietnam in class, and the only things the teacher new about the whole damn thing is what she read to us from a 2 page packet another teacher had just xeroxed for her. She claimed to be a "protester of the vietnam war," but couldnt even pronounce McNamara or get half her dates right. And then she tried to put bias into it too. I was correcting her left and right, and by the end of it she had lost control of the class, and she blamed me for it. And ive always been drawing "disturbing" pictures in class. I would like to draw large battle scenes, and to make it more interesting I would put my friends in the drawings. A teacher intercepted one when I was showing it to my friends, and I got sent to the office.

Thats enough venting for now... back to lurking

oh, and my friend got forced to go to therapy for jokingly writing in an essay that the essay made him fell like he wanted to kill himself

i never really had much of a problem with dealing with my hobbies at school since my grandfather would back me up (as I picked up all my hobbies from him) and kept the school system from ever following through with any of their shit.

6th grade: For a science project, I made what could only be described as a handheld (authentic dwarven) flamethrower using some plumbing, cooking oil, and water to elucidate on the lovely principles of heat and pressure and whatnot. My teacher was not amused but every other kid though it was the coolest thing ever.

8th grade: teacher discovers a pouch of dice pouch I carried around with me. Tries to pin me on gambling and later when she hears about the anvil tattoo I have she then decides I'm part of a gang. Spends the entire 1st semester causing trouble for me and eventually we got her fired when she started making up baseless shit.

9th-12th grade: wore full plate mail to school for halloween. In 11th I provided some chainmail for my friends and then in 12th upgrade them to fullplate.

12th grade: wore chainmail the last two weeks of school. I wore a chainmail bikini my last day for $100, much to the school authorties ire.

>>3271934
>waste some time
That's impossible. My time is worthless.

I could make the excuse that finding a job is more important right now since my unemployment has dried up but in all honesty filling out my resume makes me depressed (fired from three of five jobs, have to lie on those stupid ass corporate psych screenings so they don't know I'm a bitter misanthrope, etc.) so I've been dodging that, too. My friend gave me the number of somebody who worked at an employment agency who he was in with somehow but he won't specify any sort of relationship with. I think she's a customer of his. (He sells weed.)

>>3271947
im becoming that way more and more so. sex is nice but way overrated. i miss having someone to share everything with way more then the sex.

>>3271979
please redeem the following coupon for one free blowjob from any female/male of your preference that may show up at ragecon sir.

>>3272005
i am a woman

>>3271979
Where do you live that gambling is considered such a horrible thing (or was she just old and out of touch)?

I wrote a short story about a man finding christianity (Liberal type god), got sent to the office for hate speech.

Wrote a story about a man being killed by his wife for being a christian and got an A

>>3272021
Then jailbait in chainmail bikini is just about the hawtest thing I have ever read.

I was a fucked up kid. I watched both Digimon and Pokemon and didn't get it when people got all freaked because I drew Pikachu with heavy cyborging and massive metal claws for hands and such.

They sent me to therapy, and eventually realized I was just strange.

I was fairly popular in my "special" elementary school. When I moved to Cali, they had a party for me (by popular vote of the kids, and the teachers reluctantly going along with it), plus I got Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons from a friend.

It happens now and then that I am wildly popular at school. And it also happens now and then that people think I'm going to snap and reenact Columbine with live ammunition.

>>3272021
>I am a woman
>chainmail bikini

I am suddenly very interested in the things you have to say.

>>3272021
holy shit i was imagining myself sitting in the cafeteria when some big fat neckbeard walks in with 3 powerades, some pieces of pizza, and chainmail barely covering his tits.

>>3272021
I demand pictures to prove the truth of your statement, clothing optional.

>>3272003
so build yourself something then man. if you have nowhere to go but up all you need to overcome is yourself

>>3272064
since I'm not handing out pictures, I look like a much taller, +4 str version of Ellen Muth

>>3272021
...Not going to say it, not going to say it...

...Oh, damn hormones, please don't make me say it...

...AARRRRRRRRRGHHHHHPICSORITDIDNTHAPPEN!

Oh god! I'm so sorry!

>>3272107
silly anon, I'm breaking a cardinal rule of the internet, there is no need to be sorry

>>3272097
/r/ing pic of some of your fine dorfen crafts.

>>3271979
how the fuck did that flamethrower work?

>>3272175
I had the oil enclosed in a small space and got it to about 200 degrees C, injected some water. The water turns to vapor violently and the pressure build up sends both spraying out of valve on the other end, at that point the oil is in tiny droplets so it has a large surface area and has plenty of oxygen to combust with leading to an angry flame.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wax_fire

>>3271672

How did it end up? I'm curious as to what those other two ended up doing to the SPESS MUHRENS...

I've always been big into the whole Zombie Preparedness deal, and I've never been too close-mouthed about it.

You wouldn't fucking believe the rumours that people started about me. A few even got me damn near expelled - particularly, one persistent rumour that I'd brought a gun to school, and a "hit list," but chickened out at the last minute and run off, dropping the list as I went.

The faculty - I shit you not - believed this story, despite the fact that I was on my hour-long bus ride when this allegedly occurred.

Other students were freaking the fuck out, thinking they were number X on "The List," and I received more than a few threats against me from folk who believed the whole bullshit. Plus a few who came up to me and asked me what number they were - the question of "What number am I?" was actually the first I heard of the whole sh'bang.

I got pulled out of class by no fewer than six administrators and teachers, searched twice, and my father was called down FROM FUCKING CANADA (mind you, Southernfag here) to come in and talk to the faculty. Considering the glaring lack of evidence (as no list or witnesses ever surfaced to the alleged event), he raged pretty damn hard.

Took me months (and beating the living fuck out of the shitsmear that started the rumour, though that asshole managed to break my nose again in the scuffle) to actually convince the administration (to say nothing of the student body) that I wasn't going to murder them all.

Despite knowing the most efficient way to rack up a new highscore - a tragic, but accurate example of which is the Virginia Tech incident. (Based on the layout, it would take a team of eight to systematically wipe the H-shaped school out, and have any chance at all of surviving to get blown away by SWAT.)

>>3271979
Tell your grandfather that he's a badass.

>>3271678
I love you.

this thread wins

In year eight we had an english assignment where we were to write a thing about someone we consider a hero:

I did Hermann Goering.

I got an A.

Fuck yeah!

well, i mean, i used to jack off in school, and the janitor found out and then i was suspened for a few days

>>3272275
I'm pretty sure he knows he is

>>3272349
seriously why at school?

>>3271979
Why did you get an anvil tattoo in 8th grade?

Back in Junior High/High School I was our circle of nerdly folks' connection for all things gaming and anime. I was that mythical guy who could find pdfs of rulebooks and fansubs of series from Japan. As such, I was basically running a distribution ring of my own making copies and CDs of stuff for whoever could pony up the price of a tape or blank disk. I was eventually called up by the dean and asked if I was running some sort of pirate ring, which I of course denied. They didn't really care or have any reason to, but appearantly someone had tipped them off that I had some kind of fantastic empire of wealth born of third-gen copies of Ranma 1/2 videos. It made me feel pretty pimp.

>>3272335
Please tell me you're joking.

Please, please, please.

>>3272362
you know... I don't really remember why

I wanted to, I had the money, and I despite my parents freaking the fuck out my Grandfather approved (though I think had it been any other design he'd have said no)

>>3272382

Why?

Is it going to ruin your little world that someone you don't consider a hero is someone else's hero?

>>3272388
How large is it? One of my friend's cousins got the goddamn bacardi bat on her foot, and the second she turned 18 got a goddamn grim reaper down the side of her torso.

god, American schools suck, no wonder you're all fucked up as adults, you never got the chance of doing fucked up shit as kids. I bet no one of you got into a knife fight in gradeschool or learned to make bombs, or stole a random girl's panties either.

>>3272407
it's on my back on the base of my neck and its only about 2.5 inches across

typically can't see it unless I pin my hair up, which I don't do unless I'm working

>>3272382
Noosa District State High School, 2002 or so.

The Teacher's name was Mr Kronk.

I think he must have agreed with some of the views I espoused in it.

>>3272395
If you genuinely consider him a hero then... no, you can't possibly, you must be trolling.

I was really hoping you were kidding because that speaks very, very poorly of your teachers.

>>3272465
Now wait a sec. He served in WWI very honorably, we don't demonize Mannfred Von Richtoffen for killing well. In WWII, despite his tactics of terror bombing, which we eventually adopted, he was considered one of the brighter personalities of the Nazi hierarchy.

Not previous anon.

>>3272258
Hah, that sucks. I made zombie plan, and my school got into it. We had a small, close knit school, and everybody thought it was pretty interesting. I even got my weights teacher to pledge to instruct the survivors on combat if zombies ever attacked.

>>3272461
Maybe he just gave you extra points for having the balls to write a paper about a man who had a hand in genocide.

Hobby wize, some kid stole my bag filled with my hobby gear. I tied him up to a radiator for a day, I got suspended for that but he gave my gear back after I threatened him... No one ever fucked with me again.

>>3272258
Similar thing happened here in 5th grade. Long story short, a guy I knew stole some pens from another student back when gel pens were the HOT SHIT and all the cool kids wrote with them. He gave me one. I had no idea it was stolen. Entire theft blamed on me. I told the administrators the story, and since I was the straight-A "good kid" they believed me. The fatass got suspended, but I still got detention from it (wat). So he returns 3 days later and starts a rumor that I had a hit list to get me back. Mind you, this was not too long after the Columbine attack. Missed about a week of class from constantly being in the principal's, notebook got confiscated and searched, authorities even wanted to search my bedroom but my parents did not let them. Being obsessed with maps didn't help, as I had drawn out a pretty accurate floorplan of the school. They had no evidence, and eventually let me return to being the normal bullied nerd. Lost over half my friends from this and some of them were even scared of me in high school.

>>3272494
I think people should only lose points for considering people involved in a genocide if said genocide wasn't for a damn good reason.

I would hang out with a good majority of you. But if we do it at my house, I get to make a move on chainmail bikini girl.

>>3272485
He was also the one to issue the orders to begin planning practical details of the Final Solution.

I always did well in school; my teachers loved me and none of the students messed with me. I didn't have many friends, but it was because I was was more assburgers then than I am now (and I still keep to myself mostly).

My dad never liked (and still doesn't like) how I love computers. He would just randomly tell me to go do chores or play outside (there's nothing to do outside!) when he saw me playing computer games. He wanted me to be the type of guy who is smart, fit, good-looking, surrounded by friends, and adored by beautiful women, while I just wanted to be the kind of guy who is smart and spends all his time in front of a computer.

Well, now I'm a graduate student, which means that I get paid to learn about science and write computer simulations. Then, at home, I program my own computer game. The best part is that I heard I like computers, so my work computer has a virtual desktop open to my home computer and vice versa, so I can program while I program.

I doubt I can beat RAWK's chainmail bikini, but i did get into a fight....

I was outside of school, so no teachers, but since I had a uniform, everyone knew that I went to the local Private School...Henyways, the place was behind this shopping center, at a bus stop. I had been taking the bus for the past year of high School, and it was my Junior year. I was waiting for the bus, when these two, preppy looking kids came up to wait for the bus too....Now keep in mind the bus is usually ALWAYS late. So i was there, listening to my MP3 player i had gotten for my birthday. I had it at a volume that I couldn't hear anyone. The two kids looked like they were talking about something, so i put my volume lower, so as to see if I could hear them. They both acted as if they were scared of asking me something. I thought to myself, they probably are wondering when the bus is coming, well if they ask I'll tell them, everyone usually asks that anyways. I didn't say anything, as if I hadn't been paying attention. I kept my eyes in the direction the bus came, although, I kept the two preppy kids within my line of sight. Eventually one kid came up to me and said, "Hey!" I took out one of my head phones and responded. The kid started by trying to act smooth. He asked me if I was single, and started to interrogate me abotu my relationship status, saying cheesy things like, "Girls as pretty as you should have tons of guys after you." He started to go into how he was very manly, and found me very attractive. He was so blunt about it too. the worst part was he got all up into my face about it.

>>3272535

Instinctively I pushed him away, and he was like, "Wow, getting physical already." So he grabs me by my right arm. Since I carried 2 passenger bags to school (one was my sort of everything bag, the closest thing to a purse I ever had, the other was my school bag, with my text books and stuff) I felt very weighted down. He then approached me and tried to grope me...He managed to pop a feel, and i then reacted by forcing my left arm staright for his crotch....He didn't like that at all. He let go of me, and fell to the ground. I began to run down the street to another bus stop, and when i reached it, I looked up the hill and saw the two kids were gone. I guess the first kid was dragged off by the second kid, scared I was gonna tell someone I was being groped by some young preppy, public school kids. I wonder what grade they were in...They looked to me 14 - 15 years old, but idk...

And that is the first and LAST time a guy has ever felt my boobs...i didn't like it at all...D:

>>3272461
or maybe he was doing what he was supposed to do and just judge the quality of the composition, not how political correct it is or how close to his personal beliefs your choice was.

in sixth the dickiest professor in the school was my home room teacher, and one morning he had the fantastical idea of asking us to draw us on how we wanted to be when older, then picked up those of us who drew it in weeaboo style, made us step to the front of the class and started a 25 minute long speach he had made the day before accusing us of pedophilia, that we'd grow up to me murderers and rapists, that we were worshippers of satan, the works. i was a very moppy squirt them, whit a record of mental fuckedupness and, having just watched the(at the moment spanking new) final episodes of evangelion in a badly pirated VHS I threw myself to the floor and bawwled till I puked, to which he laughed and scorned. fucker got fired, teaching licence removed and all, but since i already was seeing the schools shrink i just got an extra half an hour of mediating to mating whales that afternoon and an letter from the school board asking for me not to go to court.

I've been pretty fortunate, despite having some rather conservative parents, they have the double edge of both working at a liberal college, and so don't condemn anything they don't approve of out of necessity. They are aware of all of my hobbies and are fine with all of them, concerning DnD in particular the most I got was a "Just as long as you know what you're doing is not real and stops when you're done playing for the day", which made sense to me.

The closest I can think of was when I first got involved in 40k, I started playing Tyranids with their 3rd edition releases.

I narrowly dodged their concerns about my fascination with the little gribblies by explaining that they were as animalistic and natural as killing machines could be, and not actually demons (I not-so-unintentionally failed to mention just how saturated with demonic undertones the setting as a whole was).

>>3272443
Ah, Okay. Those can be neat as long as it's not a fricken barcode tattoo.

>>3272545
You sir, are a genius, and he is an asshole.

Well done. You have my applause.

>>3272531
>The best part is that I heard I like computers

wat

>>3272555

It's a meme, d00d.

YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE X SO I PUT X IN YOUR X SO YOU CAN Y WHILE YOU Y.

>>3272545

Good post.

But my school sucked huge dicks, you were not judged on how good your submission was, but weather the teacher agreed with you.

Of course jewish and leftist teachers gave me healthy amounts of C's and D's.

>>3272249
Impressive. Most impressive.

>>3272541
that's because you didn't want the guy to touch you, if you want it it can be pretty amazing

most guys never tried any of that on me because by the time I had anything it was already a known fact that I could kick most guy's asses... I almost feel jealous

>>3272572
well, that's because you have a build that could put Vasquez to shame.

>>3272572
My favourite thing to do in respects to fondling, is to hold back and make them lust for it... They seem to enjoy it. Even my current Ms. Frigid Mc Christian, enjoys it.

>>3272521
No shit.

>>3272596
it's a great tactic

jesus, i really feel awkward simply because i never had these problems in school, i was pretty well liked even though it was known i was into ridiculously nerdy things. I never really had problems with bullies, in fact the first time i had to fight and properly fuck up someone i went to school with was in high school (10th grade). I will say though that Lulz, you should have kicked the shit out of that slimy fuck while he was on the ground.

>>3272587
lol, rawk, anyone ever mistake you for a man?

>>3272621
It's "Have you ever been mistaken for a man?"

because the comeback is "No, have you?"

you've ruined everything

>>3272611

Nah, running was the smart thing. Sure it would have been satisfying to kick the shit out of him, but it ran the risk of the other kid miraculously finding his balls and seriously doing something about the chick who just punched his friend in the crotch and was now viciously kicking him on the ground.

I don't understand people who like Nazis; even if you are evil, why would you be impressed by a group that was really good at killing defenseless civilians but totally lost the war?

>>3272621
No. Have you?

>>3272605
Well I did adopt it from how I was treated by females back when I first dated them...

>>3272626
er, rawk, everyone mistakes you for a man here on the nets, that's why you have to routinely remind us you aren't, remember?

>>3272587
Who is Vasquez, and how do you know she looks like said person?

>>3272638

Not a huge Nazi enthusiast, but you should probably do a little research about WHY they lost.

Hint: It didn't have much to do with the quality of their military men.

>>3272572

Well, for one thing, these kids didn't go to my school, so they didn't know how strong I was...I mean, I was able to beat lots of guys in arm wrestling during high school, and it didn't help that I would always carry LOTS of boxes of LEGO product to and from the back room of the LEGO Store that I worked at, (that was the best exercise I could ask for, although I work so far away, it's so hard to get to it)...blah, blah, blah, I'll stop before I begin to rant...

Henyways, dealing with my hobbies getting me in trouble, the only thing that really has happened to me is my parents getting mad at my brothers and sister that we have too much stuff related to 40K, and they we had to many Pokémon cards, back in the day (although the PKMN cards we sold, ain't selling any of my 40K armies)...I mean we really only want 2 armies each, so we can have our own personal armies, as well as variety amoungst each other whenever we play against each other, and anyone else...

I mean, they don't care that we've been wanting to get into DnD, or that we have been starting up Dark Heresy...They just bitch about our grades all the time...Their Hispanic-Catholics after all, and that's how we've been raised all our lives, yet M:tG, 40K, DnD, DH, none of that really flinched them...I guess they know that we know the bounderies between fantasy and reality...that or they just ignore us THAT much...I think a mix of the two is what's going on...

>>3272621
>>3272626
Game over man!

>>3272647
i know

but given that someone brought up vasquez I had to since Aliens is fucking awesome

>>3272611
All the schools I went to had a zero-tolerance policy for violence so I never got my ass kicked.

I was just isolated and tormented psychologically.

>>3272657
I was the one white kid in a school with 1500 Mexican kids.

>>3272652

That's cause your fat as hell, fattymcfatfat.

>>3272652
Just wondering, how old are you?

>>3272634

Pretty much this....If he was alone, I would have probably taught him a lesson, but since he had backup, I didn't want to risk being RAPED...

Remember, this is a private school uniform we're talking about, I may not have worn my skirt short like the other skanks at my school, but it does leave me pretty open to being raped...

Ew, I've never had anything quite like the stuff in this thread happen to me. It took me years to get into nerdier hobbies because I was more outgoing when I was younger, lots of friends, etc, and none of them were into things like D&D.

I read a lot when I was younger though, more than I do now, and it was all fantasy type stuff, or myths from various cultures. My mom decided that she was worried I'd stop being able to distinguish fantasy from reality and made me read some stupid book about an unpopular fourth grader who tries to fit in with the cool girls and worries about the size of her breasts not being big enough. She lets me alone most of the time, now, but still asks me why I'm always reading "that crazy, evil, magic stuff." When everything she reads is mystery/thriller - serial killers, detectives/attorney teams, etc.

I also had my Spanish teacher, and one of my favorite teachers in the school at the time, go through my notebook when I left it in class one on accident. In hindsight I understood that she was probably just looking for a name on the inside, and was just concerned, but at the time I really hated that bitch for reading what I'd written and leaving a "help hotline" card on the inside. It was all just some badly written poetry about Goddesses getting laid, and gay immortals, and shit like that.

>>3272648
I am nerd raging SO HARD right now.

>>3272674

I'm 18, why? I'll be 19 in March...

>>3272680
Well I remember who it is now. I haven't seen Aliens in about a decade.

>>3272648
I do not look like Vasquez, I look like Ellen Muth, and I beat hot metal into submission as a profession.

>>3272648
you remember Aliens, right? as in the the sequel of Alien?

>>3272676
He went down after being hit in the crotch... I'm fairly sure that he wouldn't've been tough enough to rape you.

>>3272638
yeah they lost the war

but did a damn god job for awhile there, better than most would

>>3272691
Just wondering. For you say you've never wanted to be touched in a sexual manner(or would I be extrapolating). Just seems a tad odd.

>>3272711

The backup is what I was worried about...If I had stayed, I might have had to fight him, and if his friend got up, then I'd have been fucked...literally...but whatever, I ran away, they disappeared, the deed is done...

>>3272710
leave it to the japanese to make alien into a dickhead

>>3272535
>>3272541
Oh, that explains it. You're a Private School kid... School for the Emotionally Distressed? Or one of them Reform Schools?

>>3272670
My grandmother enrolled me in a prep school so everyone around me was richer than me and although I was smarter than the typical student there (banged out a long-ass honors English project about Macbeth out in a single night when we had two weeks to finish it, got an A+) but I was profoundly lazy in addition to being an uncultured dork. Not much changed there, incidentally. Extreme loneliness, sexual frustration/confusion as a result of Catholic guilt, poor hygeine, and an all-around unlikeable personality led me to become suicidally depressed for most of sophomore and junior years. Even in senior year when I found a friend, oddly enough, in a partying womanizing working-out type of guy, I never really felt like I fit in at any part of the school. The aforementioned writing class/therapy bullshit hasn't helped much either. Four years out of high school, I still have yet to successfully complete a single semester of junior college because thus far I've become too depressed at times to bother going to class and at one point to even leave the fucking house except to go to my horrible fucking job that I hated and started slicing my arm up whenever I got near the point of weeping uncontrollably out of despair.

Fun times.

>>3272700
So essentially you're a dwarf crammed into the body of a 5'10" elf.

>>3272700
Are you under five feet tall, and do you have a beard?

>>3272733
Drew is that you?

>>3272700
tell me you know how to make a steak and I'll be your fucking bitch.

>>3272736
i could see it

what does that make you?

>>3272638

A group who lost a war against America, Britain, France, Russia. Please tell me another nation that would have a chance at taking on those four nations and surviving for six years whilst doing so.

>>3272730
H.R. Giger is not Japanese.

>>3272730
someone hasn't seen giger's originals.

>>3272736
except I'm 6'3"

>>3272739
not a real one

>>3272740
unfortunately for you I want to be the sub in the relationship

>>3272744

Maybe a group without an insane ideology that caused them to pick a fight with most of the rest of the world all at the same time?

>>3271002
In 6th grade I wrote a story about a man who resisted the Nazis in Germany and was defiant until his execution. I got called to the principal's office because the 'Nazis won' in my 'alternative history.'

To hell with the fact that I'm not even white.

>>3272756
Hot damn. I'm only 6'4". If we teamed up we could kill every goddamn last spider on top of the book shelf.

>>3272756
Wow... Your boyfriends must be all 6'6. Damn if I could only be three inches taller.

>>3272756
Hey, what did you wear under the chainmail bikini? It seems like it would be very pinchy.

>>3272756
it's gonna be hard for you to find a dom whit that size and those strong, ironworker arms of you. unless you're willing to put up whit a short, beer-gutted, rank smelling, balding, sailor swearing All Mexican macho man. it which case you can pick me.

>>3272756
wow, your almost as tall as me

i dont know if i should hit you or be turned on....

>>3272763
PREPARE FOR BOSS BATTLE:

MOTHERFUCKING SPIDERMAN.

>>3272756
goddamn
Who summoned you? Who wished you into existence? Men such as ourselves are unworthy of a woman of your caliber. All you have to do is shit diamonds and you're perfect.

>>3272780
Gentlemen, THERE is your dorf

This thread is now about /tg/'s dream girl incarnate.

>>3272758
what kind of people do you expect to start a what then? the Anglican Inquisition?

>>3272733
DUDE! Come to /K/ALIFORNIA! Join the California Conservation Corps! It's hard work, for low pay, in miserable conditions! Check us out! http://ccc.ca.gov/

But recruitment aside...

You know, I've never had any problems with my likes in school. I was a ghost. No one knew I existed unless I wanted them to. Was never bothered by anyone. Got in one fist fight in the locker room, beat the guy until he fell down, then hopped on him and started pounding his face until the P.E. teacher pulled me off him. I don't even remember what the fight was about or even the guy's name.
One guy once made a nervous joke about me being "the quiet type," but I never really got what he meant until a couple years later. Me and him were cool though. I think his name was Paul. I think he joined the Army right out of High School. Probably got sent to Iraq, to Operation Lasting Freedom or whatever the fuck they called it when they were marching on Baghdad. God, I hope that fucker didn't die. He was cool.

Umh... OH! Lulzy-chan, what state you live in? If it's /k/alifornia... Have you heard about the California Conservation Corps?

>>3272739
My name is Greg. Who the fuck are you?

>>3272731

Generic, Catholic, Private School, that's how I would put it...Remember, my parents are Hispanic-Catholics, and although being quite wealthy, act as if they are poor...But given the type of kids that went/go to my old high school, I'd say the atmosphere is more of a mix between know it all jocky popualar kids, nerdy anime loving theatre kids, or preppy too cool for school kids...

They never try to mingle, but once one of the popular, jocky kids asked me if I had ever played Halo...I began to talk about the Halo universe's idea of the flood, and he responded "Wait, wait wait. The zombies were aliens too? I thought it was just shoot the aliens and zombies because you're a human and they're aliens and zombies." I face palmed and tried to ignore him...

>>3272724

It's more of I just don't want to get into anything serious right now, especially since I already have a bad rep with my parents, and don't like having them breathing down my neck, thinking I'm humping a guy and getting pregnant during college...They are already pissed about me getting an Incomplete in a class, which I have the option of changing to a passing grade, but they just won't listen to logic...That and frankly I'm not pusuing any sexual feelings I may have...yeah sure, I find some guys to be hot, but then my sister starts putting things in my head about how he might be abusive, or a stuck up asshole, or I just start to think, I'll get married later, right now I'm in school still...

>>3272792
According to this thread: Sakaki-chaaan~ with a beard

>>3272771
most of them have been around my height, though one (and the best because he's a scheming-just-as-planned-/d/om bastard) was 5'4"

>>3272774
it was affixed to leather, just wearing chainmail is rather pinchy unless the rings are crazy tiny and I did not feel like spending that much time making it

>>3272730
He started as a dickhead. Literally. Look for H.R. Giger.

>>3272792
for that she'd have to know how to cook, and the one who does know how to is Jean, and she's fucking tiny.

>>3272799
steve?

>>3272806
I am going to kick your teeth in if we ever meet

>>3272798
I weigh 315 pounds (down from 335 back in July) so I'm sure I'm over your weight limits.

But saving sequoias and making sure that people don't fuck up condor habitats or build anything on completely useless desert ground in the middle of nowhere and such sounds good I guess :\

>>3272824
a militia whit weight limits is a militia that doesn't get members.

>>3272756
Damn! I'm between 6'2" and 6'5", depending on which particular liquor store I'm leaving.

>>3272792
Miko+Jean+Macha+Vance M. Stubbs+Rawk+Luz-chan

>>3272811
I know how to cook, I'm quite good at it.

also some giger

>>3272816
<_< I'm Stephen, dammit.

This thread is making me feel short...even though I'm 5' 9"...

>>3272802
Why do all females want to get married? I can't think of anything more harrowing. Enjoy waisting the best years of your life in celibacy.

>>3272802
Yeah, halo was kinda the one thing that brought everyone together... Except others played it for the sheer 'durr hurr let's go ashootin' shit!' aspect.

>>3272849
Fun fact: fa/tg/uys are short and too fat, ca/tg/irls are tall and too skinny.

>>3272856
Halo. Better than Myspace?

>>3272864
Yes. No. Maybe. Ask tomorrow.

>>3272853
why? for the social security benefit's, legal leverage and reality credits are cheaper. besides is a great way to reduce Medicare costs and in most jobs people who are married but have no children get more promotions.

>>3272806
You sound better every second. We should screw.

>>3272531
Yo dawg I heard you like to program so I put a computer in your computer so you can program while you program.

>>3272802
listen to your sister less. she is trying to keep all the men to herself, obviously.

As far as myself getting into trouble, my parents freaked out on me when i started playing DnD (I was away at fucking college ATT, FFS) and Warhamer, which my mother keeps describing as "little Boy Toys" apparently unaware of the gay implications of that phrase. its fucking hilarious.

>>3272811

I know how to cook...I love cooking...sometimes I like to experiment, once I mixed instant rice with eggs and ham, I put some salt and a bit too much pepper into the eggs and ham, and I don't know if the butter I added to the instant rice was goodm but it made the rice and eggs go together great...Ham didn't taste bad in there either...I hate ham otherwise...I also like to cook curry, not because I'm all weeaboo and shit, but because my brother's girlfriend once made curry for him and his sisters (me, and our other sister) and brother, and we all loved it so much I asked her to teach me how to make it....I like making curry :D!

>>3272853
I don't quite think I fall in with that at all as well... celibacy sucks

>>3272878
also, I fail for using an apostrophe were it shouldn't belong.

>>3272853
I don't mind the married part, it's the kids thing I want no part of.

Many women, once they hit their late 20s/early 30s, drop the "oh I don't want any kids" and enter the BABIESBABIESBABIES mode.

>>3272883

Well, my sister is a stick-in-the-mud, typical nerdy girl...and i doubt she could attract anyone except perverts who have a fetish for the nerdy girl look...seriously, she's so boring and monotone, I doubt a guy would last 30 seconds in a conversation with her...

V
   D
V

>>3272902
kids are only cool during the period when they know how to use the toilet but they still don't think puking your guts out and groping each other is the epithome of fun. and god help you if they pick up footie, liking that crap equals stopping your mental development.

>>3272902
avoid babies, adopt an 8 year old.

>>3272935
Pretty much, when I was substitute teaching my favorite group was the 9-11 year olds. They're not retards and can follow instructions but the hormones haven't made them retarded yet.

>>3272935
Footie?

>>3272798

Actually, I live in Virginia...sorry...and no, never heard of them....

>>3272935
Pretty much, when I was substitute teaching my favorite group was the 9-11 year olds. They're not retards and can follow instructions but the hormones haven't made them retarded yet.

Also new thread here: >>3272977

>>3272798

>Former CCC Director B.T. Collins liked to boast that the Corps was all about "hard work, low pay, miserable conditions." Over the years, the CCC added "...and more!" to that motto, reflecting both the unlimited challenges and the opportunities in the program.

God Bless you for your work.

>>3272862
I'm 6'1" and over 300 pounds

I can beat you all.

Last week of school (a few years back now), the school was one of those old, single-building schools with the central heating vents connecting every room.

We undid a few of the grates and I had my cousin sneak in three piglets he didn't want from his farm, and we painted 1, 2 and 4 on them before releasing them into the vents.Drove past two nights later, the janitors are still looking around with flashlights for that one they couldn't quite find.

Not to mention they shat everywhere.

>>3272957
sorry, I forgot you football is played whit the hands.

>>3272888
I think I've fallen in love with you...

Wait. you're an ausfag too?