The quest for the Dark Tower

In before a long run on sentence.

Kill the monsters; steal the treasure.

'ere we go! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

Phantasy Star IV. Steal from it.

This reminds me of the Dark tower.

Newfags won't get this.

People need help. You provide it through dance.

The President has been kidnapped by Ninjas.

Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President?

Dark elves smoke too much and have crappy gods.
Kill them all.

>>2952449

>R

Wot da zog?

We know your out there, and we're coming for you.

The last man on earth sat alone in a room. There was a knock at the door.

You help the government silence its secrets, but what happens when they want to silence you?

Dreams happen in their own dimension of time-space. Can you find your way home?

>>2952489

I thought I'd just leave this here.

http://www.mediafire.com/?xgjmytnbwmm

It was the best of times and the worst of times.

I didn't expect this thread to give me good campaign ideas. But it is.

A black guy was just elected as president, you have a gun and a full tank of gas. Are you a bad enough dude to save your country?

>>2952552
>>A communist was just elected as president, you have a gun and a full tank of gas. Are you a bad enough dude to save your country?

The little girl who owns you is going slowly insane. Can your group of toys navigate her twisted mindscape and save her?

>>2952525

Hint: It's WAAARGH Da Orks from Rogue Trader times.

Time Nazis are coming to conquer the past. Can your army of dinosaurs stop them in time?

The Bard BBEG has taken Yakity Sax as his theme song. Can you find a theme song awesome enough to defeat his?

>>2952571

Fuck. He's unstoppable!

>>2952552
>>2952555
You're saying the same thing in this instance.

Everything that dies comes back as a zombie. EVERYTHING.

>>2952567
>>Time Ninja Samurai Berserker Vikings are coming to conquer the past. Can your army of overgrown, flesh eating armadillos stop them in time?

>>2952578
But the motive is different.

A strange man gives you a gun with 100 untraceable bullets, and the name of the person who is responsible for all the shit in your life. What do you do?

You are standing near a mailbox. To the west is...

>>2952608
RAPE THE FAIRY

RUN! NO TIME TO EXPLAIN!

You are a team of delivery guys in ye olde fantasy world. Hijinks ensue as various monsters order pizza from you.

>>2952588
Flesh eating pangolins, thank you, and yes, we could.

You've just been given a device that randomly opens a portal to someplace else. Lots of people will kill you to get it, but without it you'll never return home.

Your party is just a bunch of normal guys, but everywhere you go there's a bunch of smarmy heroes and a dickhead villain fighting each other. Can you survive and prosper while the epic battle rages around you?

>>2952636
TIME TO SLIDE!

This thread is so win.

A man was locked in a room for ten years. Then he was released.

A tyrant named Igniz has taken over the country. Join the resistance to try and free the land from his deadly grip.

"Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope."

A western. In space.

>>2952645
Say what?

A flying engine crashes in your room. A man in a bunny suit tells you to burn things

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

>>2952645
GHOST SLIDE

"The man in black fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed."

For the good of mankind, there has to be sacrifices made.

Lightning strikes. Everyone's gender is reversed.

A slow-acting, highly contagious, and seemingly 100% deadly disease has spread throughout the entire world. It seems unable to affect children twelve years old or younger.

"Suddenly, bananas! ...Thousands of them!"

The Spice must flow.

The Emperor challenges you to a danceoff. You have only one year to master the Funk Side of the Force.

Jesus came back on January 1st, 1918, and so did the magic. But this Jesus isn't real, and you have to deal with that.

>>2952662
I see what you did there.

the BBEG have lost his phylectery ring. are you a bad enough dude to destroy it in a vulcano?

You stumble upon a genie, of sorts: for every wish he grants, you must sign a contract. No matter how carefully you read it, it's never close enough.

>>2952645
The hell?

You all play the greatest killers and monsters through out history. You've been brought back to make amends for your sins.

(I might use this one)

You just had your fate tied together with someone else's. If either of you die, so does the other.

The world is broken. Find a way to stop Entropy itself.

Your creations take on lives of their own.

>>2952761

Awesome if it doesn't end in a boss fight against Entropy made manifest.

Related. Exalted, fuck yeah.

>>2952738
Go look up the tv show "sliders".

On the 21st of January, 2009, a gate to a world of caverns inside a giant hunk of living rock opens under times square. The living rock wishes to interact, and can grant great power to those it wants to, but other gates to other places are opening.

Your last breath escapes your body.
But this is only the beginning...

There's more than beef hanging from the local butcher's hooks, and--shit, where'd my daughter run off to?

"We will all kill each other.
If I do not kill I will die."

>>2952774
Huh. Figures that someone had already done it. Thanks. On that note:

Someone is trying to kill you, with no seeming motive and no explanation. As you try to escape, someone else grabs you and shouts, "Come with me if you wanna live!"

You're from a small farm town. You find out most of the world is undead, and you're actually cattle.

WE ARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS TO COLONIZE A NEW PLANET.

>>2952822
WE ARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS TO UNDERGO A RADICAL NEW MEDICAL PROCEDURE.

WE ARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS FOR A TOP-SECRET COVERT OPERATION.

>>2952831
"So glad that'chye 'volunteered' for me little exp'rment, 'ere. Dun' worra, this won' hurt a bit."

>>2952422
It is April 1964 and next week all Europe will be celebrating the Fuhrers birthday. What is the meaning of a fat pale body that has washed up on a Berlin lakeside?

The enemy has thousands of heavily-armed, gigantic

WE ARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS TO VOLUNTEER FOR VOLUNTEERING !

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT !

The enemy has thousands of heavily-armed, gigantic spaceships ready to lay waste to the planet. We have a protractor.

Are you Inquisitors?

No ma'am, we're musicians.

If you pass all the tests, you will be rewarded with delicious cake.

"Son of a bitch just stole my car!"

Lex Luthor stole forty cakes. He stole 40 cakes.

Be the unwitting or witting instigators of the apocalypse of an alien species.
Becomes gods in the interim

>>2952689
So... I could be the little girl, and nobody would mind?

>>2952648
revenge is like wine...

>>2952453

The darkness has already claimed an entire world, and untold millions of lives have been lost. Mankind's last best hope is two hundred million miles away and leaving fast.

A screaming comes across the sky. It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.

We fought.
We won.

So what the oracle said was true; we are mankind's best hope. Shit.

Veni, vidi, vici

The evil king is dead. Without your protection and guidance, his heir will die or become a monster like his father.

I just accidentally a whole bottle of cola. Is this bad?

Fuck bitches.

Make money.

The last thing you feel is a terrible chill overtaking you as you are run through. You awaken on the other side, the last duty you must complete still burning in your mind.

OH SHIT.

MONSTERS.

>>2952964
We fought; we won. If you can call this winning.

You raised a prayer to the gods, and nobody answered. If you can't move Heaven, you'll raise Hell.

Just as you are about to once again become human, to finally lose the curse of damnation and vampirism, the police shoot you. What do you mean why, you killed two police in the middle of an apartment hallway, kidnapped three girls, and murdered a shop clerk.

SUDDENLY LASERS.

HUNDREDS OF THEM.

inherited a house and damned mice inside the walls won't let me sleep

>>2952494
FUCK YES I HAVE THAT STORY SAVED

Too bad he fucked it up on the second try though.

>>2952935

This movie is fucked up. But it's good.

Commie penguins vs fascist polar bears. Even the Unconquered Sun has no idea what to do now.

>>2953052
Did he? Could things have been fowled up because he listened to the legion of anonymous instead of trusting his well crafted writefag skills? Cause I didn't finish reading his second run through of the second part, since I felt he nailed it the first time.

Set off a trap, fall into a mind; symbolism is fun! A two backed beast, tight-packed and moving globs of meat, broken angels, insect-men and literally flaming gays.

>>2953061
Keep ignoring Creation in favor of banging Luna and playing the Games of Divinity.

>>2953075
He redid the second part? Was it the same idea (short scene in a future combat) as when he first posted it, or did he completely redo it?

Damn, the things I somehow miss.

War. War never changes.


Drink up, the world's about to end.


No-one would have believed, in the last years of the nineteenth century, that human affairs were being watched from the timeless worlds of space.


Welcome to the world of tomorrow!

Your side lost. Feel like going out with a bang?

Humanity lost the war. Feel like going out with a bang?

Way to go, you and your dumbass, magic-using friends nearly ended the fucking world. There's still a few stragglers here and there in England though, and you ARE the most powerful beings on the frigg'in planet now...so what now?

Fuck Dandelion-Eaters. Get Nuyen.

>>2952861
glad someone read that book...

Find me an ocean where water stands still. You'll find your answers beneath it.

Also, SHadowrun is the answer to fucking everything.

>>2953150
>>SHadowrun is the answer to fucking everything.
So you're telling me, if I buy this "SHadowrun," I'll get to fuck everything?

All the world will be your enemy, and if they catch you they will kill you.

But first, they must catch you.

>>2953206
Watership Down you were a great book. Now if I de-furry you, you're a great campaign?

FUND IT!

His shotgun reloaded, John gunned the engine of his Kalasaki and flew off the side of the satalite being ripped apart by re-entry behind him. (Six rounds) he mused, (barely enough to kill even one dragon...)

>>2953259
What's the source on this? I know I've seen it before.

>>2953242
Beleive it or not, they actually did make a Watership Down RPG. Look up "Bunnies and Burrows."

The system is fucking _ancient_. It came out in 1976, making it only two years younger than D&D.

Use a potion and kill main antagonist in the first fight with a lucky strike.

Kord has a bone to pick with a particularly nasty dragon, but he's too busy to kill it himself. He promises you some immortal Viking bitches if you do it for him.

>>2953273
GURPS Bunnies and Burrows is superior. And I have a .pdf of the original B&B, but I wasn't really thinking about playing as rabbits.

The Waking World and the Dreaming are colliding.

Find a way to stop it, or you will (literally) be intruduced to your very worst nightmare.

>>2953284

>>2953273
>It came out in 1976, making it only two years older than D&D.

Fixed that for you.

>>2953272
Do also want source. Was there a pic related?

"Gentle readers, we have a problem within "Pride and Prejudice." Lizzie Bennett, it transpires, is actually an elderly man named Elminster, who claims to have been using something called a "Guise of the Thespian" and who has an accomplice within "Wuthering Heights," location unknown, called Drizzt Do'Urden."

>>2953286
Strange spirits promise to make your dreams come true, if you help their agents preform a dangerous ritual to merge two worlds.

But be wary, powerful people are acting against you, fearful of the coming twilight.

>>2953303

He said D&D, not AD&D. And D&D dates back to '74. Get the facts right before "fixing", please.

>>2953303
D&D first came out in 1974, dude.

>>2953307
Bump for source.

>>2953352
>>2953349
>>It came out in 1976, making it only two years older than D&D.

If D&D came out in 1974, and B&B came out in 1976, then B&B is two (2) years older than D&D! The fix is right! And here I thought fa/tg/uys were at least good at math.

>>2953371

This smells like troll, but I'll bite anyway.

I was born in '88. My little brother was born in '90. He sure as hell isn't two years older than me.

lern 2 math.

>>2953349
>>2953352
>>2953371

Mathmind?

>>2953368
Isn't this text from one of the xkcd comics?

"Hey bro, I just enrolled you in the Ultimate Fighting amateur competition! Your first fight is Friday, and check this--it'll be on live national television!"

>>2953424
This is best if the person enrolled is a wizard equivalent. Or a bard.

>>2953459
Tenser's Tranformation

>>2953420
Yes, but modified to look original.

"Napoleon came back with his entire army--in undead form. The Immortals are manning France's entire nuclear armament, and the rest of his zombies were last seen marching into the Atlantic, headed west, bound for the Americas; meanwhile, a familiar red shadow overtakes Moscow as Stalin pays Putin a surprise visit."

Timetravel shenanigans; big secret book of corruption.

>>2953272
>>2953420
The original was from XKCD.

A mercenary team works in the future. Every plan fails dismally, but not enough to kill them off.

Russian vampires hide beneath Nazi occupied Moscow, trying to kill Hitler when he visits the newly renamed Hitlerstadt. The motherland must be avenged!

"He who controls the past commands the future. He who commands the future conquers the past."

>>2953644
I like.

War. War never changes.

>>2953713
"He who controls the present, controls the past. He who controls the past, controls the future."

The ancient magics and technologies you found last week were left by an ancient, star faring race. They know you having them, and they are coming to take back what is theirs.

They have awoken. Run.

>>2953911
You win for the 1984 reference, he loses for some stupid knockoff, that I don't care about.

Then came the message, tightly focused at our star, transmitted simultaneously by hundreds of their ships.

"We know you are out there, and we are coming for you."

>He who controls the Spice, controls the universe!

"Nice to meet you, Rose. Run for your life!"

This is the world. Go kill stuff.

After all, we all make choices.

But in the end, our choices make us!

"All right, you sons of bitches! You want to live forever?"

>>2952593

Fuck Yeah!

Rasputin has sent a Russian spy to London in 1894 to commit murder and tarnish the credibility of Scotland Yard. Team up with Sherlock Holmes and solve the case.

>>2953028

Paladin falls, takes everyone with him.

Moar.

in ad 2020
war was begginning

Ever changing chaos of limbo

Please archive this, /tg/, this makes for some good writefag ideas.

ROLL FOR INITIATIVE
YOU FAIL, GOOD LUCK

A man's true nature is what he does in a dark room. It's time to turn out the lights.

>>2954271
It is done.

Here is a spoon.

Kill God with it.

>>2954271
>Thanks for your request.
>It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
>This thread has been requested 1 times now.

>>2952861
>>2953138

You're as good as dead to your government, your friends, and your family. What now?

You are a bat. Defeat Ozzy or suffer the consequences.

The scientist from the future claimed your world was just imaginary, the result of a bizarre time travel accident that mixed fact with fiction.

You shot him to death - now, how are you going to end the Great War that threatens to destroy the world?

Prove you're more worthy to inherit the throne of the Emperor of All Suns than any of your six siblings.

Here's your zap gun and your spaceship. Time to defend the Earth.

The world is unraveling beneath you. Will you try to stop it... or hasten it?

You get a henshin stick that transforms you into a magical girl... except you're normally a guy!

What do you do?

An alien menace invades the Earth, and you are the only one who can stop it. There are no crowbars.

All of reality as we know it is dependent on the continued existence of a single human being selected once every thousand years.

He has just killed your family and everything you hold dear.

All the Supermen were killed during the first week of the alien invasion. Now it's time for Average Joes to step in.

>>2954244
I lol'd amazingly hard.

>>2954237
I'm game.

>>2954443
"Though it will cast heaven into hell, and shatter the pillars of the world. Justice will be done."

>>2952505

Damn.

>>2952689
Shit, I read that book.

By sheer supernatural willpower in a moment of crisis you become a god. You are now a piece in a much grander game.

You find yourself subconsciously drawn to a temple dedicated to the Wind. You have an affinity with the primal elements, and with practice, you can harness it.

You are dead. Would you like your possessions identified?

You've never believed in monsters.

Turns out the monsters believe in you.

For the seventh time you open the door at the knocking and find nobody there. This time, though, you find a note that reads "We are all inside now."

(Bonus points to anyone who remembers the thread I stole that from.)

some fa/tg/uys did some low-level campaign ideas, I saved my favorites:

A sixth grader has stolen the 2nd grade ball. Seeing as how you follow the playground rules of not blowing the whistle, you must get revenge as only second graders can - murder.

Young, pink-haired and perky Stephanie West has been sent to Creighton to stay with her eccentric and roguish parapsychologist uncle Erasmus Pickman West, who lives on an airship floating just out of range of the towns 'bizarre emanations' which have twisted the townsfolk into grotesque forms - the 'Creighton Look'. With skills learned from her psychiatrist father, Stephanie must help Erasmus guide these unfortunates away from the worship of dark pre-human gods and put them back on the road toward good mental health!

You find a kitten with a mangled foot by the side of the road. You recognize him as Mr. Mittens, belonging to the girl you've got a crush on. You have to get him to a vet, or he'll bleed to death.

But you're recovering from chemotherapy, and you're allergic to cats. And it's starting to rain. But you have to get the cat to safety. You have to. You have to. You have to. God, it's cold. Hold him closer. You're both shivering. You have to make it. One step at a time. Don't fall. Don't fall.

Panzer Commander. Milkmaid.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil. Because evil is my bitch.

Let the Galaxy burn. Seriously, how did no one do this one yet?

>>2954423
I choose masturbate.

>>2954755

from the "ways to fuck with your players in a meta-way" thread. i wish it had been saved tho, i wanted to steal ideas from it.

>>2954773
It was, actually. Delivered.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1791071/

Eloi, eloi, lama sabachthanai?!

The gods are simply inhabitants of another plane, with a few weird abilities they find normal. They are drawn to Earth and imprisoned by their believers' faith, and it is up to you to set them free.

"A handful of people on a leaky boat are going to save the world."

"Exactly."

You awaken from "life" as a human to discover you are a child in the 33rd century, experiencing VR holo-learning as your generation ship travels to your new homes.

And then your ship encounters something ...

>>2953242

Nothin' furry 'bout Watership Down, boy.

They're just bunnies. Not anthropomorphic bunnies. Not bunnies with human wants and needs. Just bunnies. That makes them not furry.

There's been a mixup, and Manny the Fluuznian loaded your ship with 3 tons of toxic waste, 12 tons of paperclips and thumbtacks, 5 tons of defective prophylactics, and 2.62 tons of pink-beige paisley wallpaper.

And your ship has to find buyers in the Outback Nebula for all this stuff, or you can't make your ship payment, and your beloved ship will explode ...

You really WERE a butterfly dreaming of being a man.

Now here's your plasma rifle.

Ninjas have been kidnapped by the President.
Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the ninjas?

"I can give you everything you ever wanted. Do you accept my contract?"

A bitter man wronged by the world strikes back. You agree with him entirely, but can you let everyone burn to give him justice?

The little girl that owns you has become ill, Boss has seen this before, it's a plague cause by diabolic entities inside of her. Can you and your Ham-ham friends shrink down and fight them off in time, or kill her before they start the phase to spread the spore? The fate of the world rests on your tiny shoulders.

Star Wars space zombies. Luke never whinned so hard.

>>2955137

> Star Wars space zombies. Luke never whinned so hard.

Wined? Whined? Winned? Whinnied? Winded? Win Ned?

WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN, DAMN IT

Communist robots are laying waste to europe. Take command of our own robots and save our allies!

save the world with your communist superobot pilot team against the neoceltic union of britain

fuck yeah!

save the universe from the monsterminds.

>>2953424
HUTCHINS. My immortal foe.

>>2954723
>>Shit, I read that book.

IIRC, it was called "The Girl Who Owned a City." Pretty good, too.

>>2956063
Holy shit thank you I was trying to remember its title and that was it.
Only scene that readily springs to mind was when their guard dogs got poisoned.