Rite 546: Fuck a hive queen

Rite 400: Endure being locked in a cell with 1 of every major xenos - Ork, Eldar, Tau, etc. You are not allowed any xenos to be killed.

Rite 310: Rickroll a fellow commisar

rite 247: psykic arm-wrestling with a greater daemon of tzeentch

Rite 004: Volunteer to be converted to a 4chan server for 1 month

Rite 376: Meet a rabid SPEES MAHREEN fanboy and answer all of his questions without killing him.

001: DICK PUSHUPS.

Rite 664: Punch out an Angry Marine.

Rite 142: travel to Holy Terra to sacrifice a psyker to the emprah

Rite 298: Disimpact the Emperor's bowels

Rite 274: Find out what makes cinnamon toast crunch so popular.

Rite 072: Sweatin' to the Oldies.

>>2754661

how many dick pushups?

>>2754678
Many.

>>2754678

over 9000

Rite 665: name every rite completed beforehand, the method for doing so, and every minute detail involed

Rite 566: Try to enrage Bob Ross to the point of violence and profanity.

SUPER SECRET RITE 667: Sex with Macha. In the Missionary position.

#409: Date with a Daemonette and resist her brea... charms..

Rite 123: Convince a Sister of Battle to not be a pedo

Rite 666: Confront Chaos and return.

>>2754695
Imperial missionaries have to have sex with Macha in the Grey Knight position.

Rule 132: Steal Doomriders bike.

>>2754705

Ooh, that's going to be tough.

>>2754705
FECK! DRINK! GIRLS! ARSE! EMPRAH!

>>2754678
>how many dick pushups?

One is all you need.

Rite 4: Eat an entire peck of pickled peppers whilst punching a carnifex in the face. Naked.

Rite 367: Assemble a bolter. Without your hands.

Rite 248: Count the licks to the center of a tootsie pop. In the middle of a battle.

Rite 666- Rinse, Repeat

Rite 256: Fellate a plaguebearer.

Rite 141: Trick Tzeentch cultists into making you a professional-quality 5 course breakfast.

Rite 101 - Cooperate with a fellow Grey Knight in any other rite he performs.
+
Rite 505 - Succeed in forcing a fellow Grey Knight to fail in a rite he is performing.
=
Lulz

>>2754816
I can just the reciprocal dickery this would cause.

Rite 444: Eat 100 White Cathedral burgers with everything.

Rite 445: Suit up completely, including placing the helmet firmly onto your head and turn off your armor's ventilation except for air recycling systems. Do not remove your helmet under any circumstances until told to do so.

Rite 001: Walk up a flight of stairs in full armor without breaking them

Rite 307: Visibly flex your muscles while inside your armor.

Rite 007: Kill Bond.

Rite 427: Out-dick Eldrad

Rite 33: Come off as less of a dick than another Astartes in front of a common citizen.

Rite 225: Save a fallen Adeptus Astartes to be put in a Dreadnaught.

Don't be seen while doing this.

HARD MODE: You're not allowed to be the one who cripples the Adeptus Astartes.

Rite 324: Beat a Tzeentchian Greater Daemon in a game of chess. Then destroy it with a logical paradox.

Rite 19: Watch Gigli

Rite 517: Kick High Ecclesiarch Brennan up the arse

>>2755447
I'm fucking in!

Rite 666: Repeat.

>>2755462
This Rite subject to review after 194 potential candidates killed themselves in the process.

Rite 523: Prove your mental acuity by stopping an Orkish WAAAAGH using conversation and no less than six graphs.

Rite 534: Prove your mental acuity by re-inciting said WAAAGH against Chaos.

Rite 535: Prove you have a will to live by escaping the plant before exterminatus.

>>2755495
Nonsense. 194 dead only proves that there are 194 fewer corruptible aspirants.

Rite 397: Sex up a Daemonette without contracting any Chaos taint. Then you must have her hand in marriage after the proper Rituals of Courtship. This step is to be done BEFORE said sexing up.

>>2755511
How exactly would you keep the daemonette from dissipating into the Warp?

>>2755531
-Exactly-

>>2755531

obviously that's part of the challenge

it's not like this is a pre-school scavenger hunt

Rite 415: Organize a Schola-Progenium scavenger hunt.

>>2754642
> Rite 310: Rickroll a fellow commisar

I'd pay good money to see this, and the results, actually. Or just wait for the writefaggotry.

>>2755557
initiate brother sven looked at initiate brother alfredus,
"were no strangers to love" he said
alfredus looked up from his book on damonic influence,
"what?"
"You know the rules, and so do i."
"listen, if this is about you spilling your holy oils of cleaning for your bolter, i said i wouldnt tell"
"A full commitment is what im thinking of" sven continued
Alfredus closed his book, "did rite 309 get to you or something?"
"You wouldnt get this from any other guy"
"That sounds like heresy, fag."
sven just smiled and continued
"I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand"
"Go tell the chaplian or something, i really dont want to hear your little whinge at the moment," Alfredus opened his book again
sven belted the book from his hands and started singing at the top of his lungs
"never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you"

>>2755620
fucking awesome

>>2755557
Fuck rickrolling a comissar. Now I want to run a DH game where the acolytes have to sortie down to an abandoned research station on an ice planet or something and exterminate the mutants and other scum that have taken up residence therein in an arduous trial of skill and bravery, all for the goal of retrieving a lost dataslate known to contain extremely important research information about some recovered Eldar technology, and after half the party are dead and they have finally retrieved the dataslate and activated it it seems normal for ten seconds and then plays a video of Eldrad performing "Never Gonna Give You Up" before exploding

>>2755639
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

WHY IS THIS HILARIOUS

Rite 602: Road trip!

111: Eat an entire Carnifex. The Grey Knight is allowed to have the Carnifex restrained beforehand, but if he wants it dead, he must kill it himself.

Rite 396: Get away with it, despite those meddling kids.

Rite 616: Convince a Sister Of Battle to play a game of battleshits with you

We need to put these on 1d4chan

rite 420: smoke his weight in slaneeshi psycho herbs. then smoke his weight in slaneeshi cultists.

>>2756296
Seconded

#372: Drink a gallon of milk
#373: Eat a spoonfull of cinnamen
#374: Do the Dew
#375: Fight Chuck Norris and live

Rite 017: Get GW to lower their prices

>>2756360

Looks like the Grey Knights have failed one of their 666 Rites. FOR SHAME!

rite 101: simply walk into mordor
backwards

>>2756367
fool, they are the only reason we aren't paying $1000 per guard model.

rite 333: one on one with a zerg rusher, you must win.

>>2754620
>>2754705
>>2754717
Oh wow. I want one of those models for my =][= army.

Right 256: Make the Emprah blink

Rite 611: Bring Sexy Back

Rite 69: Sisters of Battle

>>2756296
>>2756324

http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Rites_of_Detestation

Still needs a lot of work

Rite 002: Correctly thin one's paints.

>>2755554
Anyone else think this should be drawfagged? Little shota commissars and loli stormtroopers playing?

Rite #18: Re-read Decent of Angels.

>>2756535

When you write it that way, then yes it should

>>2756486
Added all the Rites up to this point. You're welcome.

>>2756535
BIG YES

Rite 341: Find out what Zengar Zombolt's Zanpakutou and Youmu's swords cannot cut.

666: Just relaaaaax.

>>2756617
I'm trying to hate you to death. Seriously, fuck Japan and everyone who likes it.

>>2756567
SQUAD BROKEN!

>>2756664

>>2756617
The bonds of love.

>>2756664
Be a psyker. Then you can hate people to death over the internet.

>>2756715
Right up until you roll a 9, then shit really starts to go down.

>>2756676

Rite 012: Beat all 12 levels of Battletoads in a single run. Aspirant must resist the temptations to curse or swear, as these would interrupt veneration to our glorious Emperor. Absolutely no self depreciation shall be permitted, for the Emperor guides thee in all things.

When all rites are done, including the SUPER SECRET 667 one, and the candidate thinks he is ready, he suddenly discovers a new rite, one that he could have swear was not there before:

Rite 000: Conquer an entire daemon world. And do it FABULOUSLY.

>>2756746
You also enter the Grey Knights at one rank higher if you can do it all alone.

>>111: Eat an entire Carnifex. The Grey Knight is allowed to have the Carnifex restrained beforehand, but if he wants it dead, he must kill it himself.

HARD MODE: Go and fetch your own Carnifex!

>>2756567
god i couldnt even do that once. guess thats why im not a GK

>>2756763
IMPOSSIBURU MODO: Personally breed an entire planet's worth of them, and eat them, one by one.

>>2756771
AWESOME MODE: Get the Carnifex to eat you, then Chestburster it.
Yes, I know most Nids don't have a digestive tract. This is supposed to be beyond a normal Spess Muhreen.

>>2755639
get a writefag to type that up and put it on the eldrad page for 1d4chan ? :3

>>2756617
This was later amended to include an alternate mode

Stand in the way of Zengar and Ratsel's "real men ride each other" combo zankantou slash, and survive WITHOUT laughing uncontrollably.

Rite 003: Read the entire internet. Then prove you aren't a heretic.

>>2756789
Does that mean that Fuklaw is on his way to being a Grey Knight?

>>2756834

Maybe, and thats because somehow he does not make a good Custode.

Knit socks for kittens. D'awww

Rite 002: Quote the Koran. Backwords.

Rite 642: Checkers with Khârn.

>>2757242
Really? I think he'd make a good Custode, actually. It's not like the Emperor is going to interrupt him.

180: Beat every serving Chapter Master at darts

rite 17: prove that micheal jackson never touched a kid

>>2757396
RITE007: Shaken, not stirred

rite 24

make a porno. play it for the emperor

>>2755639
FUCKIN' ELDRAD

>>2757318
FUKLAW CANCELS CUSTODES ; INTERRUPTED BY EMPEROR

>>2757454

Why thank you.

Rite 404: ERROR. RITE NOT FOUND.

Rite 251: Out-sex Cain.

Rite 315: Grow a Power Beard.

Rite 557: Play and beat Battletoads

Rite 112: Shake hands with Faptau.

Rite 099: Find an 99Flake ice cream that actually costs 99p.
During battle.

RITE NO. XXX: KILL EVERYTHING

Rite 316: You must beat Macgyver in a race through all these Trials henceforth.

HARD MODE: You are not allowed to restrain him in a stasis field.

Rite 082: Win a dance-off against the Disco Marines.

>>2757828

Refer to >>2756728

Rite 053: Partake in a Pretty Marines Pre-Battle Floral Arrangement Ceremony without becoming an Angry Marine.

Rite 114: Prove how it's Lupus, and make House laugh in the process.

Rite 034: Travel the galaxy teaching xeno women to luurve.
HARD MODE: Don't get called a heretic once.
EXTRA HARD MODE: Get a thumbs up from a passing Inquisitor whilst doing so.

Rite 589: Infect Madagascar

Rite 610: Mindfuck a psyker. Manually.

Rite 230: Read through the CAD Archives.

Rite 100: Lead a squad to victory whilst singing a Capella version of Boom Boom Dollar.

Rite 003: ???
Rite 004: Profit

>>2757910
IMPOSSIBURU MODO: Make the whole series interesting.

073: Skullfuck a servo skull

Rite 086: Fight for your rite (to paaaartaaaay.)

Rite 150: Form a Dreadnought barber shop quartet.

>>2757940
You just use the CAD rule

Rite 042: Discover the meaning of life the universe and everything

Rite 093: A coke bottle on purpose.

Yes, the whole bottle.

>>2757986
That's just EASY MODE. I forgot to put in an addendum: Rewrite the whole series from the ground up, using the same theme of each strip, but each one is to be made far more interesting than the original.

Rite 445: Complete this fucking crossword puzzle I got in the paper today.

>>2758009
>Rite 093
>093
>93
Then why nor .rar files?

rite 2: beat all 4 iron chef in kitchen stadium at the same time.......

Rite 660: Survive HUGS TIEM with Unyuu

Rite 619: Watch any movie with Christopher Walken in it and not even THINK that any scene involving him is awesome.

>>2758072
Rite 421: Eat a bell pepper even more dramatically than Chairman Kaga does.

>>2758107
620: Add more cowbell.

Rite 126: Manage to compleat Battletoads in 2 player mode...... alone!

Rite 621: Hear the name "Chaos Lord Metallica von Freebird" without even cracking a grin.

>>2757896


FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

Rite 658: Resist the urge to buy insurance from this guy, despite the fact that you would only pay $19 a month and have full coverage at no extra cost.

Rite 133: Rhyme with orange

>>2757896
I've infected Madagascar on Realistic Mode. Thrice.

Rite 612: Be aware of the current location and activities of C S Goto, and take no action.

>>2758176
flange?

Rite 446: Watch Zoolander, and drink a shot of tequila whenever something stupid happens. Survive the alcohol poisoning.

>>2758176

Lozenge.

I AM NOW 1/666th OF THE WAY TO GREY KNIGHT-DOM.

>>2758225

Lozenge doesn't rhyme with orange any more than Door Hinge does.

>>2758176
Blorenge. It's a mountain in Wales.

>>2758217
That's it I couldn't do it... I guess I washed out

>>2758181
Did you start in Madagascar?

>>2758181
Fuck me, dude. How the hell did you manage that?

>>2758181
liar liar liar liar pants on fire

>>2758254
1st time: India
2nd time: Middle-East
3rd time: Japan
>>2758587
One word: Canada.

>>2758239

It may just be my particular way of speaking, but door hinge rhymes extremely well with orange, but you're totally right about lozenge

Rite 412: Steal a Trainee Sister of Battle's panties

>>2758587
Parasite. Buy off starting symptoms. Buy all modes of transmission. Wait.

You're welcome.

Rite 39: Fap to an army of tyranids

number 5:

perform mambo number 5

number 6: TROMBE INTERRUPT an important figure in the middle of a grandiose speech

hard mode: do it to an inquisitor
extra hard mode: of the ordo mallues
HELL MODE: who you will work with as a grey knight
heaven and or hell mode: don't let him find out.

>>2758725

Oh, come on, that one's easy.

Rite 400: Make love bloom on the battlefield.
Rite 401: Move and Shoot.

>>2758697
Do they even WEAR panties? I always thought they'd frown on them as frivolous.

Nothing like cold, rusty, ancient power armor on your cooch to reaffirm the faith in the God Emperor and all that...

Rite 034: come on guys, has nobody suggested this yet?!

Rite 613: Reread all the works of C S Goto and resist the urge of equipping yourself with a MULTILASER.

>>2758716
I had a different approach to that. Yes, I sold all the symptoms. But after that, I maxed out cold resistance and spread it to Canada. A ship got infected there and got Madagascar. Shortly afterwards, I started building the other resistances until they were maxed out too. At this point, all was infected. It was a simple matter to buy symptoms to kill everybody.

>>2758762
Of course. They are white with pink aquilas on them.

Rite 601: cure the cancer that is killing /b/

>>2758812
Impossibleeh!

Rite ⑨: lose all lives with the Icicle Fall -Easy- spellcard

Rule 244: read a porn Loli D comic and have no heretical thoughts about it.

Rule 487: be balanced in Dawn of War - Soulstorm, even if a Chaplain is attached to your squad.

>>2758734
How does IoM know about Trombe though...

>>2758856
That's easy. Keep trying to graze while you've got a virulent cold and keep sneezing.

612: Watch every season of Who's Line is it Anyway without laughing once

423: Find out which brother captain Ravenor is the sentient testicle of.

>>2758944
That could explain why so many fail...

>>2758944
HARD: be balder than Colin Mochrie
NIGHTMARE: as above, but without being Angelos

>>2758944
Rite 613: Watch every episode of Seinfeld and enjoy it.

>>2758972
That's it, I'll never be a Grey Knight.

Rite 001: Fill in the Grey Knight application. Spell your name correctly.

>>2758972
What's so hard about that?

>>2759326
OH SHI- WHATS MY REAL NAME AGAIN?

>>2759326
Ha HA! Already I'm 1/666th of my way to being a Grey Knight!

>>2759326
Aww fuck.

>>2759326

MY NAME IS STERN BLACKHAMMER OSWALD RAVENSMAW GERALD HAMSHAW JERICHO ULYSSES GERALD THE CONQUEROR OF DEMONS AND WOMEN OF A NEGOTIABLE NATURE, THE THIRD SPAWN OF DUKE HAWTHORNE.

My friends call me bob.

>>2759374
Hi Bob

>>2759326

WHAT!? OH SHI-

What was it again?..

Rite 004: Find a huge creature who should have huge guts. Rip and tear its guts.

Rite 568: Climb a wall of dicks. Without ropes or hooks.

>>2759548
Rite 569: Catch the double nigger before he jumps over the candle-sniffing fuckfence.

>>2759601

Rite 570: Out-swear an Angry Marine.

Rite 226: Defeat a Necron playing the Necrons in Dawn of War. Using IG.

Rite 034: Make porn of it. No exceptions.

OCDfag here; anyone mind if I reorganize the wiki entry and renumber the duplicates?

>>2758856
Rite 67: beat Subterrean Animism on lunatic mode.

HARD MODE: DO NOT DROP YOUR SAKE

>>2759844

Go for it

>>2758224
This is gonna be my new drinking game

288 - Win a breakdance competition with a Harliquin
347 - Read the entire "Twilight" series and not an hero
591 - Cause at least every second Grey Knight member you have been aquainted with to lose the game

The wiki has been rearranged and correctly numbered. As far as I can tell, it's all rite. [rimshot]

>>2760305

hey, dude, make it link to http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/2754620/
for the thread

>>2760305
Good going so far.