So, being home over the summer, I took this time to catch up with old friends and enemies. One of my friends turned out to play 40k (and rolled orks). We spoke, discussed, and generally bragged about what we did over the year.Today, I get a package. Inside is a single ork boy, and a note. To paraphrase the note, the Ork was Uzgob, the only boy in my good friend's army to be undefeated. Uzgob has always gotten stukk in, or hastily run back for anuver go. An impressive kill count, too, ranging from space marine commanders to greater daemons of chaos. Truly the orkiest ork in the army. I was deeply touched, and I felt a funny stir in what's left of my heart.I remembered I'm launching my rocket, Da Shootiest, this September / October. I am going to superglue and firmly attach Uzgob to the main assembly of the rocket, and launch him three miles in the air.Uzgob RokkitRanga will pierce the heavens with his WAAAGH!
>>2294270I asked here how to paint the rocket, remember?
>>2294275Oh shit, I remember that rokkitgood stuff that
>>2294275oh right.my memory is crap.ill just fix my mistake then.
HOLY SHIT YOU'RE LAUNCHING AN ORK INTO SPACE
go uzgob go
This is the story of how Greenskins managed to become Space Orks.
If he comes back damned you're banned.
BY GORK AND MORK
>>2294312I meant to say damaged.
video or it didnt happen
>>2294323I have full confidence in the construction of my rocket. Nothing SHOULD happen.>>2294326I definitely won't forget a video of the launch.Plus, with the successful launch of Da Shootiest, a Level 1 certification, it allows me to launch bigga rokkits.
Nice
Uzgob iz da greatest boy uv our generation...WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
>>2294259>launch him three miles in the air.Holy shit, really? AWESOME ORK IS AWESOME
so basically you're taking his precious gift and destroying it. wtg, faggot.
>>22943771/10
>>2294372That's what I was told.The type of engine I will be given should launch the rokkit two to three miles high, with most test-firings reaching more on the three mile side of things.
First we had that ork who got run over by a car and only lost a hand. Now we have an ork who will ride a gigantic rocket to his destiny.I love orks.
>>2294377Leave this thread and don't come back until you understand orks.
>>2294417Actually, that's a point in itself. With that ork strapped to it it may just destroy the international space station.
>>2294377You obviously don't know anything about the philosophy surrounding orks and their players.This is possibly the single greatest tribute to his friend anyone could pull off.
I'm getting this image of the rocket accelerating, faster, faster into the sky. On top stands Uzgob, standing tall, choppa an' slugga raised high, triumphantly staring down the fast-approaching cosmos, letting out the greatest WAAAAAAAAGH an ork has ever produced. I...words fail me. May Gork and Mork watch over Uzgob.
Also,ORKY TEARS ;_____;
Step 1: Put miniature camera near the back of the rocket, facing forward, but make sure not to throw off aerodynamics.Step 2: Place Ork model straddling rocket facing camera.Step 3: ???Step 4: MOTHERFUCKING SLIM PICKINS DA ORK
>>2294454This rokkit isn't big enough to mount a camera on the outside. The Cert-II, however, may be. The Cert-III, definitely, but those are incredibly expensive.
>>2294470Fuck. Oh well, now I'm torn on facing him forward to WAAAAGH to his destiny or face down to pull a Slim Pickins on the way down/see the ground below him plummet away.
>>2294470MONEY IS NO OBJECT WHEN IT COMES TO ORKINESS.Geez, any 40k player has tons of cash to throw around. At least this would be something epic and unique instead of MOAR MINIS.
>>2294479WAAAAAAGH to his destiny definitely. The only thing that could possibly make this tribute any better is if this Ork was a Stormboy.
>>2294444
>>2294479Definitely facing up. No ork would look down at where he came from, he'd be looking TOWARDS THE STARS AND HIS ORKY DESTINY ;_______;
>>2294498Glue his back onto the rocket. HE IS ONE NOW.
Fukk dat shoot it at a kittin or on da roof and katch it on fire.
>>2294444I'm crying manly, yet orky tears for Uzgob.
>>2294444DRAWFAAAAGS!
>>2294510Uzgob Rokkitranga, the Stormboy who pierced the heavens.
>>2294540FUND IT
>>2294548That's like...some sort of Ork Jesus right there.
>Uzgob RokkitRanga will pierce the heavens with his WAAAGH!
play thunderchild while the rocket launches
>>2294565When the rokkit comes crashing back into the earth, Uzgob will return, to lead all Orks into the greatest WAAAGH! the universe has ever seen, having grown to use the rokkit as a normal jetpack from his sheer orkyness. This will be the WAAAGH! that unites all of the Orks in the galaxy, and they will crush everything in their way with the legendary Rokkitranger at the front.
>>2294595Uzgob RokkitRanga is the greatest ork I have ever seen.
>>2294595I'd waagh with RokkitRanga.
>>2294595Apocalypse DatasheetUzgob's Return - 200 pointsPlace a marker where you want, scatter it 2d6 feet. All models within 12" of the landing point take a S8AP3 hit that causes pinning on -2 Ld. Place Uzgob at the center of the marker after the hit has been resolved. All stormboyz (enemy or friendly) on the board must move as fast as they can towards Uzgob, and upon reaching him or the unit he is joined to, all form one unit controlled by the player who purchased Uzgob. While moving towards Uzgob all stormboyz are forced to run in the shooting phase and are immune to pinning.A stormboyz unit commanded by Uzgob may use a WAAAAAGH! move every turn, and gains the furious charge, feel no pain, and fearless special rules.
My manly tears for Uzgob are boundless. I...I hope your friend knows what you're doing, and can watch the video and cry manly tears too. A WAAAGH! to pierce the heavens... T_T
>>2294664awesome
>>2294666>I...I hope your friend knows what you're doingI'd actually suggest sending him back a Stormboy model, carefully made, of Uzgob as a warboss.
>>2294696seconded... all in favor?
>>2294664Make it so you can also purchase stormboys squads that deepstrike in after him and join him.
>>2294709AYE.
>>2294709WAAAAAGH
>>2294709WAAAGH!
>>2294696So pick up a stormboy, and convert it to Uzgob, and send it to my friend? I'll definitely give this a go.
>>2294738Send it? Only acceptable via rocket.
>>2294744or airmail
>>2294738Make sure his pack is larger than normal and/or colored like Da Shootiest.
itt is why we love orks.
Gorkspeed, Uzgob, Morkspeed.
Uzgob knows. Uzgob feels the great waaagh coming. All of us, believing in the greatest waaagh ever known, will fuel Uzgob, and push him to do the impossible, touch the untouchable, break the unbreakable, to realize his destiny to unite all orks as the greatest Ork Stormboy Warboss to ever exist.
Man. I don't even play and I can comprehend the glory and genuine orkiness of this./tg/ at its best.
When are you launching it? I want to look to the heavens in tribute when you do.
>>2294792I was supposed to launch last May, but I was delayed. I should be guaranteed a spot sometime this september or october. I'll definitely keep everyone here posted.
>>2294783I CAME
>>2294783that pic would be the best crossover/adaptation ever.
>>2294754If he could get his hands on the spare vindicator cannon round that comes with that set, it'd be perfect for a huge rokkit pack with some fins added to it. The thing is as big as an ork model by itself.
>>2294814Vindicator Cannon round? I'll see what I can do.
>>2294814at an RTT this weekend, an ork player had his stormboss with a pulsa rokkit strapped to his back
>>2294828It was only a matter of time.
>>2294828Oh hey RMD. How's trolling suiting you?
>>2294828age for uzgob
>>2294824Pulsa Rokkits are Forge World only, right? There is no plastic pulsa?
So, any idea where this thing will land?
>>2294852In our hearts, anon. In our hearts.
Uzgob, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHing where no ork has WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHed before.
This is beautiful,
>>2294852Well, intelligence says I am launching it in a large field outside Daytona Beach for now, so depending on wind it should scatter d3 kilometers, within the field.
an incredible faggot.
>>2294866On the off chance that Uzgob survives his trip(in any form, even just melty lump), you must use that as the basis of an upgraded Uzgob(if a melty lump, put Uzlump in the centre of a scratchbuilt Stompa, Gargant, or something else huge and Orky.
>>2294872
>>2294892Oh he'll survive, I guarantee it.
This thread should be archived.
>>2294845You make your own. It's a piece of piss.
>>2294907No, the results should be archived, this thread is shitty, for the most part.
>>2294907its archived on suptg
>>2294932Vote it out then.
>>2294845if you want a great pulsa rokkit, buy a disposable enema bottle and paint it red... im not kidding
>>2294664I swear to god I will field uzgob in my next big game. That said, godspeed, Uzgob.
>>2294866build an space rocket, place uzgob on nose, Claim the international space station fer gork and mork.
So then I imagine it's safe to say we've pretty much unintentionally added to Uzgob's fluff?
People will one day tell stories of Uzgob. About how on the back of the mightiest rokkit there ever was, he roared into the heavens and conquered the cosmos in one moment of pure Orkiness. God speed Uzgob, god speed.
...I love /tg/.
>Uzgob*stares in shock*R'myr, have either you or your friend read Deff Skwadron? It's a graphic novel, about a skwadron of Ork flyboys led by none other than Kommando Uzgob.
>>2295086there's also an ork nmed Uzgob in Love Can Bloom. It's a common ork name.
>>2295086I've read parts of it. The thought has just occurred to me.
>>2295121even if two orks named that, one of them in fanfiction no less, qualifies as a "common name", it's still a great coinciedence.
>>2295143i just googled "Uzgob Ork"there are a great many orks named Uzgob, but dis one iz speshull.
I just finished building my 2nd warboss today. His name is now Uzgob
Uzgob, yooz da orkiest ork I see to do dis. Liek dat one time we blew up dos 'umies and den dis big 'umie wanted to take ma shoota den you shot him. Liek dat time. The WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHG! will be gud 'nd shitz. We gibbin you dat giant ting dere. It's red.
can orks even breath in space?
>>2296982Orks are masters of force field and teleportation technology.When da boyz want to waaagh in space they get a mek to put up a 'breathy bubble' so they can.
>>2296982as long as he is fightin or rokkin
We need a Drawfag to draw the epic image of Uzgob and Da Shootiest. I'm tempted to suggest its at what amounts to an orky version of the launch complex at Cape Kennedy. The elevator crooked and the tower made from various scraps and such leading to the top of Da Shootiest.Either that or Uzgob's Return and landing Da Shootiest in proper the Ork Fashion
>>2296998This must be done.
Well there better be at least one guy chanting ORKZ! ORKZ! ORKZ!
>>Well there better be at least one thousand guys chanting ORKZ! ORKZ! ORKZ!
>>2297025That'd be better!
>>2297006I second this
>>2294338You said that about the flame thrower too.
This is the orkiest thread there has ever been.
Is this in the archives yet?
>>2294577oh god, this thread just got EVEN MORE MANLY TEARS ;___;
bump for WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!
If I where a mod, I'd sticky this.
uzgob deserves frontpage, bump
this has inspired my next orky army to be based on the great Uzgob Rokkitranga.thank you for so much Uzgob ;___;
Da Shootiest is a rocket that will pierce the heavens with Uzgob at the helm. With a mighty WAAAAAAAGH he will go where no Boyz have gone before. Uzgob has me crying manly tears. I can only imagine him flying through the sky with ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH or possilby "Libera Me From Hell" playing.Fight the Power Uzgob RokkitRanga!
I am truly inspired to pick up my Ork army again. This is beautifal
UZGOB ROKKIT RANGA!!!!!!!!!!!WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!!1
this is the best thread I've ever seen on 4chan. For Uzgob Rokkitranga!
I wanna be an airborne rangerI wanna live a life of dangerI wanna do just what I oughtaI wanna rape the colonel's daughterWAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!
God dammit, Shas. Now I HAVE to start playing Orks as my next army.
>>2297801Likewise. FUCK YOU SHAS, I DIDN'T WANT TO SPEND MY TAX RETURN ON 40k.
>>2297810Haha owned!
i feel like getting the Green Tide now
Yeah, what the fuck is this motherfucking thread. Never seen anything ORKIER.I gotta get my Rogue Nigga Boyz, goddamn.
>>2298042So where exactly is Uzgob riding Da Shootiest fit on there? I think it fits under ROKKIN!
>>2298208
ZUNE!
Use some weak glue and attach one of those GI Joe parachutes to him so that he can come back down safely
>>2294664Uzgob himself should count as a Warboss with a rokkit pack. Optional Stormboy Nobz retinue.Each time Uzgob is alone and rolls a 1 on his move for a Rokkit Pack, he scatters 2d6 inches (a hit means Ork player chooses were) instead of taking a casualty. Running into enemies this way counts as having charged.Da Shootiest should work like the drop pod from hell, as he has likely coated it with unspeakable volumes of Dakka by the time of landing.
WAAAGH
bump fer uzgob, our orky lord and savior
>>2297801Not to take anything away from the epicness of this thread, but part of me is beginning to wonder if /tg/ is funded by GW. :P
>>2299748if anything OP is a viral marketer for forgeworld
Everyone in attendence must WAAAAGH! as the rokkit launches.
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!!!
Uzgob has reached out to us, and touched us all in ways we never could have imagined. We all see a bit of ourselves in Uzgob, our hopes, our dreams, our ambitions. Uzgob lives the dream, and we live through Uzgob.
I am Uzgob
That's it. Tomorrow I shall buy a box Boyz.Thank you.
I figure Uzgob's return would be a little like this, only orkier:http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=wcW_Ygs6hm0
His WAAAAAAGH shall be louder than the sound of a hundred killkannons, the flame of his rokkit brighter than the fire of a thousand burnaz.Godspeed mighjty ork, godspeed.
This...this is perfect.>>2294664This makes it DOUBLEPLUSPERFECT.
R'myr.If you live in England...Remember, remember, the 5th of November.
KABOOOOOM
>>2300121He said he was launching from daytona beach. I'm guessing he's in america.
When Uzgob Left Earth A six part HD event only on the Discovery Channel™
>>2300209Uzgob: Da sky wuz blu, but I dun fink I saw no gork or mork.
>>2300170Still, it's awesome imagining an ork having a contest of who can make the biggest explosions with Guy Fawkes.
Bonus points if the descending lump of plastic hits a living creature.
>>2300257Uzgob is going to blow up the sky in a blaze of WAAAGH!Guy Fawks tried to blow parliament up.I think Uzgob's gonna win.
>>2296998>>2297006We are /tg/.Our will be done!...anyways, in the grim dark future of millenium 40ka brave bold ork named Uzgob was launched on his wayhe had been fighting the Tau racebut Shas'O Rymr didn't like him so he launched him into spaceWe'll send him n'meThe most insipid we can makeAnd force him to watch it endlesslyIn hopes that we'll find a way to make Orky morale breakNow keep in mind he can't control when the n'mes begin or endBecause he smashed those gubbins and now he's stuck with his gretchin friendsGrot Rollcall:CamgrotStabboGobboGroucho!If you're wondering how Uzgob eats and breathesAnd other heretical factsJust repeat to yourself "it's just Waaagh!,I should really just attackIn the name of the Emperor"
>>2300263double plus points if it wounds it.
Try and put the plastic lump in an Orkified SPESS MAROON dreadnought.
>>2300271The premise is Uzgob and his grots got stuck on a space hulk without any mekboy to get them off it, and are forced to watch n'me (40k parodies of anime under the premise that they're popular Tau entertainment) in a Tau experiment to try to find a way to dampen the power of Waaagh and crush Ork morale. It's not working. I'm imaging blatant 40k parodies of popular/infamous shows getting ripped on unintentionally from the orky context of Uzgob and the grotz.
>>2300290fuck you. No.Convert the remains of Da Shootiest into a Killa Kan and put his smoking lump inside it, piloting it through sheer WAAAAGH!
>>2300297FUCK. YOU.Now I can't get the image of a blonde-haired shit with the "^_^" expression going "Someday, I'm going to be the Emperor! Believe it!"
>>2300297I too enjoyed Mystery Science Theatre 3000, but why did it have to be constnt anime?
>>2300325/tg/ still thinks tau are weeaboo.
>>2294548>>Uzgob Rokkitranga, the Stormboy who leapt through time.
>>2300340which saddens me.
>>2300358I know, right?They're clearly space communists with weak, brittle bones and udders.
UZGOB ROKKITRANGA STORMZ THE HEAVENS!!!!
>>2300325oh, also, Orkz would love some anime.Nothing quite as Orky as impossible physics and explosions.
>>2300340What, not enough mecha for you?
>>2300373
>>2300392Orks would hate anime. Watching anime requires one to spend time not focused on shooting and chopping things. Anime is not Orky and it never will be.
Uzgob is proof there is still awesome in /tg/
>>2300677Lies. They'd like Berzerk.
>>2300703never the less, watching anime would be muckin about, time much better spent choping, shooting, or stomping
>>2294259God speed Uzgob... God speed
>>2300982sweet
>>2300982WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
>>2300982We shall WAAAGH with Uzgob as he ascends into the skies.WAAAGH FROM ENGLAND!
>>2300982why'z he look scared?
>>2301071the force in just pushing back his face, you're crazy if you think he's scared!
>>2301021Read >>2294866>Daytona Beach Since when is Daytona beach in England?
>>2301071Dat's not fear, ya runt, dats Uzgob's WAAAGH! face.
>>2301071He's not scared, just WAAAAGH'n real fast!
>>2300982It's... Beautiful...
>>2301085It ain't.But wherever you are, WAAAGH with Uzgob. And I am WAAAGHing with that fucker from all the way over here.
>>2300982wait till he reaches space. He'll raise 'is choppa an' dakka high, and let out a great WAAAAGH at the infinite expanse!
>>2301117bump. we gotz uzgob launching, now we need him realizin' his destiny, and him comin' back down
Pierce the Heavens, Uzgob.Pierce the Heavens with your mighty rokkit.
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!
>>2301134seconding
>>2300677not watching it, but their daily life shares a lot whit shout-based mech animes. >>2300725if a mek is watching animoo than it's looting sice he's bound to make a few kans and dredds and shit right after waching it in order to make the the rocketfests, midfligth dime turns, gigantic bean cannons ,colony drops, etc. he just saw.
>>2301134WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>2301134AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!
>>2301441>>2301444
>>2301441>>2301444It's...beautiful...
>>2301472i thought the boner pic was funnier
>>2301444He's going to land on his feet and smack those other orks with the rocket, isn't he?
>>2301441>>2301444>>2301477I couldn't decide. I'll put both up.
>>2301483i hope it explodes. that would be awesome
Uzgob RokkitRanga is my new god
>>2300982I require a wallpaper version of this.
>>2301489No, it drills down into a pocket of molten iron, which erupts into a solid metal volcano. It is carved out into the strongest fortress in that quarter of the galaxy.
>>2301488I require a sauce.
>>2301509seconded
>>2301545Source unknown. I got it from here actually.
This thread may autosage, but Uzgob will live forever.
WWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
this thread will not die
best thread ever
