when will you sci-fi nerds realize that dyson spheres cannot actually function

GRIMDARKMART?

>>1538770
>fiction

>>1538770
Does it matter? It's called science FICTION for a reason.

>>1538770
Please, enlighten us as to how they wouldn't work.

>>1538770

An actual solid sphere, probably not. But any of a dozen variations can come arbitrarily close to accomplishing the same goal.

>>1538773
More or less. I don't yet know exactly what kind of structures I want, what corporations still exist, etc., but I'm toying with the idea of various fast food chains that control most of the food supply and are led by AI personifications of their old mascots.

>>1538874
I like this.

IS YOUR CLEARANCE LEVEL HIGH ENOUGH TO HAVE FRIES WITH THAT, CITIZEN?

>>1538940
Bump for Friend Grimace!

>>1538940
Oh god I lol'd

OP here, back from a train ride to university. I did some thinking.

I think I'll stick with the fast food/restaurant franchises, for the most part - not only do they control food supply, they control other resources as well, even energy.

Also, nearly every decision I have made so far is based on the assumption that any campaign setting which is dominated by fast food companies is already too silly to care too much about what else I do.

So first, scale. Fuck scale. I'm not going to give a flat number for the size of the place, but it will be huge. Entire solar systems will have been consumed in its construction. I idly sketched a planetoid the size of the Moon assimilated into its structure, suspended in the middle of an even bigger chamber via gigantic cables and girders. That's going to be one location. Fuck megastructures, I can have a yottastructure if I damn well want to.

>>1539771

CALL THEM TOYOTTASTRUCTURES

IT WAS COPYRIGHTED IN 2290.

Second, technology and science. Obviously the technology level of any civilisation that can produce something on that scale that doesn't cave in on itself AND power it is fucking amazing. (or eating up a good portion of the local supercluster, but what the fuck ever.) I think I'll avoid details and have a lot of this technology lost to 99.999999% of the world, but a place of this size will need teleporters or even portals so it's going to have them.

Science? Fuck science! As much as I like science fiction, I don't want to dick myself over by spending hours poring over science books to make sure every little thing that appears is theoretically sound and then wank myself raw in the player's faces about how realistic Fast Food Sphere is. I'll try and be realistic where possible, but meh.

On that note, magic? I don't know. I was toying with the idea of the sheer amount of energy, generated anti-gravity etc. devoted to keeping the place stable warping reality until it starts to pierce the veil between realities and energy (maybe this is where some of the energy powering the place comes from?) called Fluxx starts to seep in that can be used very much like magic by certain people. Silly, I know, but keep in mind I'm totally using Friend Grimace now.

Next, corporations! This is going to be the fun part.

Since this is a side-campaign idea I don't mind where I get my ideas from and how I use them. Maybe Domino's rules a chunk of the place and it's oppressing its people and Pizza Hut is the resistance. Whatever. Style-wise, though, I think I'd make it kind of like Oddworld - silly on the surface, concealing a brutal conflict of ideas and philosophies. (Decision on whether or not to incorporate a sci-fi Sigil in the dead centre pending idea on what the Lady would be.)

The corporations will have different origins and leaders for variety, and a vastly different culture. Maybe even different races.

>>1539790
Heh heh. I actually like this because toyotta- isn't a real word so it's even more unclear how big it can be.

Anyway, one AI that came to mind was Wendy's, which started as an AI which then became a humanoid female altered to be nigh-immortal and possess amazing psychic potential. My current idea of Wendy is a female AI-human hybrid entity, an altered human hooked up to an enormous machine which has since almost completely assimilated her organic form. She is no longer completely human and cannot feel what they feel, but this has not driven her hateful and insane - instead, Wendy is one of the most motherly and compassionate entities in the Sphere.

To cope, though, she's also become a sensovore - those devoted to Wendy have cybernetic brain implants which allow the psychic being to feel what they feel. These people are driven to experience as many different things as they can (lol, sensates) so their patron may as well.

Since this can be GRIMDARK as well, this can range from sending their lady as much pleasure as possible to those who believe that there can be no pleasure without pain, and force brain implants into captives so Wendy may feel the pain - or, worse, pleasure - forced on them.

>>1539915

Any other ideas would be appreciated! I'm going to start with major fast food chains that have mascots, and put them in control of large swathes of territory and unique technology - I was toying with the idea of the Colonel's secret being some kind of lost technology, or a nigh-infinite energy source - but they mostly control resources. I could have something like Microsoft (or Apple Inc., Microsoft is a little obvious) controlling technology (while relying on others for most of their energy, food, etc), even, if it fits.

>Microsoft is a little obvious

>>1538874
I don't recognise the left and middle ones in the bottom row for some reason.

>>1540072
The bottom left is Little Caesar.

The bottom middle is the oven mitt from Hamburger Helper.

>>1540095
No, it's the short-lived oven-mitt mascot for Arbys, a couple years back. He never took, so to speak.

>>1540139
Oh, you're right. I got my glove based mascots confused.

>>1538940
While I wait to see if my trolling for ideas goes anywhere, I looked up McDonaldland and found this on Wikipedia:

>As the ongoing obesity epidemic in western nations has been increasingly noted by the mainstream media, McDonald's and other fast food chains have been under increasing pressure to revamp their products and advertising with healthier alternatives. As part of this campaign, McDonald's has agreed to discontinue marketing to children under the age of twelve and the McDonaldland characters will be completely eliminated; Ronald has been recast as a role model for healthier lifestyles.

As Grimace is fucking awesome, I refuse to allow that to happen; on the other hand, it did give me A idea.

McDonaldland could be under the control of Grimace, an AI (or an actual alien lifeform, who knows) who oppresses the people with his Tripod-like Fry Guy robot minions in a paranoid attempt to weed out supporters of Ronald McDonald, the old ruler of McDonaldland who wanted to make things healthier and eliminate the other characters of McDonaldland.

McDonaldland is one of the biggest territories in the setting but large parts of it (particularly those under the watchful eye of Grimace) are basically Paranoia with every product (including, say, portable plasma cannons) named "Mc_____".

I don't know what would become of Ronald McDonald in that case though. Maybe McDonaldland is two regions, one ruled by Grimace, or Ronald is a rogue AI roaming the system.

>>1540393
In before Ronald McDonald as the Emperor of Mankind.

Cool story, bro.

This... has potential.

Also, I want to titty-fuck that Wendy in the fight game.

Bumping this thread before I forget because I go to sleep in 3 hours and it needs to last 8-10 hours past that if I want to do shit when I wake up.

Anyway, the biggest stumbling block(s) for me right now is what races I should use, and what to call them. The toyottastructure is big (and possibly old) enough for entire races to evolve and build civilizations, but do I want them?

I could go the easy route and make everything human, robot, cyborg or some other kind of transhuman, only I can't say "transhuman" without feeling wanky.

I could also have elves, dwarves, etc., but... yeah, that is a cheap way out. Although I can see the land of Starbucks forming an economy based entirely around pretentious college students who have pointy ears and little goatees and complain about having to save what's left of the environment.

It's certainly potentially big enough that alien races could have been absorbed into it as their worlds were harvested, and if nothing else I can pull a Red Dwarf and have races evolve from cats or something.

>>1541767
And yes, I'd totally put kittenducks in.

Anyway, a couple of random scribbles I need to expand on:

- The toyottasphere is too big to be inhabited everywhere, and most of the... countries? Worlds? are self-contained arcologies on a massive scale. If portal/teleportation transport was cut off, years-long expeditions would need to be mounted to get to the nearest other civilisation, but you wouldn't HAVE to to survive.

- Also, there can be skies and clouds and weather. It's big enough and if a place can't have it it can be generated!

- Speaking of, names. For a start, it struck me as kind of fitting for things to have silly names (we already have "toyottastructure"), so I might attach brand names to things (see previous), add "Mc" if appropriate, or just start spelling things with unnecessary consonants (botz, fluxx, etc.). Every time an "x" is inserted it must be inserted twice because one x isn't EXTREME enough to sell.

Anyway, probably talking to myself, so I'm going to do something more /v/ related.

>>1541767
>>1541835
words words words

>>1541846
I'm in training to write gaming webcomics.

>>1541881 webcomics
Don't.

>>1541885
I kid.

Have something you can't unsee I uncovered while searching for mascots.

A lot of this is courtesy of some friends who thought it up.

- Since things are being given silly names, I'm going to at least rename the corporations so it's not COMPLETELY obvious. McDonald's becomes Maxx, I'll do the rest as it comes to me.

Ideas I may or may not use:
- The McNugget Buddies count as a playable race of worker drones created by Friend Grimace to maintain Maxx territory.
- KFC serves dinosaurs. The Colonel's secret (well, one of them) recipe is the genetic technology he possesses, far beyond anyone else's capabilities; his territory is also populated by the Chimerikanz, basically the toyottasphere's Beastmen.
- Microsoft still exists as Tetrasoft, an AI entity whose attempts to control the technology of the McSphere failed horribly. Now, its mind and hardware is incompatible with most of the McSphere; in its desperation it has begun a campaign of corrupting the McSphere to enable its own existence.

>>1542188
More ideas I may or may not use:

- There can be oceans. Therefore, there can be Captain Crunch.
- Some of those bodies of water (particularly in Maxx) can be shakes, soft drink, etc., all with their own ecosystems.
- Starbucks still exists (they're all over the damn place already), and may or may not be populated by a human subrace of pretentious pointy-eared goatee-wearing eternal college students.
- Dominos' is a totalitarian regime which has successfully invaded much of Pizza Hut's lands; Pizza Hut has resettled in smaller places and are quite nice aside from the occasional RAGE and a fanatical devotion to opposing the Domino's menace.

>>1542188
/tg/ is weird but it gets shit done.

mcsphere engineer

>>1542580

This is terrifying and awesome. Is this original drawfaggotry for this thread or is it fanart from before? Either way I wuv it.

>>1542588

original. I read the thread and that immediately popped into my brain. Blame fan here =D

>>1542593

Nice. I'd pester you for more but I've vowed to respect the drawfags.

>>1542580

I'd gladly crap out another one

>>1542663

136 years? That had better be a tasty burger.

>>1543072
It will. The guy who orders it will never get to taste it, though. He ordered it for his descendants. There is whole dynasties of families that wait in line for the most delicious fast food. Some have stood in line for thousands of years, just so someone in their family may one day sink their teeth in the kind of hamburger that only gods may eat. You can get the plain old food anywhere, but the real good stuff? The line starts here.

Plot hook: The last living member of an old family that has been waiting in line for two thousand years is suffering from a debilitating disease and may not survive the week. Luckily, her family's wait is soon over, since her meal will arrive before this. The family that is behind her in line however, will do anything to take her place, effectively giving them two meals! They are many and wealthy where she is lonely and poor.

>>1543072
What do you know, it is a tasy burger!

>>1543168
You meanie ;_;

>>1543140

This is win. Bumping for more.

>>1538763
I must say, sir, that after reading this thread, this is an awesome idea.

Counts as Betty Crocker/Aunt Jemima?

>>1544315
USER WAS FLAYED FOR THIS POST

OP is back!

>>1542663
>>1543140

Fuck yes. I'm using this, although I MIGHT seperate people into a lower class (the kind of idiots retail workers blog about) and an upper class (people who are at least halfway intelligent), with the latter getting benefits like the good meals when they want it.

As for races...

>>1544951
The primary race of the McSphere are the Customers, descended directly from... fuck it, they're humans.

Anyway, they come in sub-races, but most have only cosmetic and cultural differences.

Makkas - the Makkas hail from Maxx, and are typically blonde, white- or red-haired Customers wearing jumpsuits color-coded for their clearance level. All but the upper clearance levels are heavily oppressed by Friend Grimace. Makka refugees can be found in other lands, waiting for St. Ronald to come out of hiding and lead them to the Promised McDonaldland.

Chimerickens - Part man, part animal. Most appear as normal Customers with some bestial accessories - sharp teeth, cow ears and a tail, feathers for hair - but some appear more animal than human. Most are created by the Colonel.

Huttons - These Customers wear Victorian-era clothing and enjoyed a fairly benign civilisation with novel steam-powered and clockwork technology. That was before Dominance appeared. Now, most Huttons are either blank-faced brainwashed minions of Dominance, exhiles defending their remaining lands or guerilla fighters, trying to turn their knowledge of alchemy and the creation of the metallivore Klokwerkz against Dominance.

Friend Grimace mspaintfaggotry slightly related.

>>1544315

USER WAS MAZED FOR THIS POST

>>1544315
USER WAS MADE INTO TOAST

Noid - The Noids are "post-human" cyborgs, created from Customers by Dominance to enforce its will. Their short appearance belies their superhuman combat abilities, which they employ with impunity when Dominance's laws are broken. Or someone looks at them funny. Or they're bored. Noids seem psychologically incapable of chasing a target for more than thirty minutes, and will let them go free at that point.

McNuggets - Friend Grimace merely assumed control of Maxx's noncustomer races rather than stamp them out. The McNuggets are an adorable little race of rounded blobs with faces and stubby little limbs that serve as the repairmen of Maxx. McNuggets are weak, but are created in batches of 4, 6, and 9 clones, providing them with backup bodies when they suffer "accidents". Free McNuggets fancy themselves tinkers.

Windans - Windans are self-reliant, disciplined Customers from colder (coolant) regions of the McSphere, and born with latent psionic abilities. Many Windans become Psyonz (who focus on honing their psionic talents), Sensates (who focus on experiencing as much as possible to please Wendy) or just join the People's Army and shoot people up with Baconators.

Now I'm hungry. Back later.

Needs a literal White Castle.

>Chimerickens - Part man, part animal. Most appear as normal Customers with some bestial accessories - sharp teeth, cow ears and a tail, feathers for hair - but some appear more animal than human. Most are created by the Colonel.

The problem I am having here is, are Chimerickans food? Being originally created to serve in that capacity is pretty likely, but "someone wants to eat me!" is a shitty backstory for a PC when you use it on every-fucking-body.

I might make it so that chimerickans are safe in most places, provided they stay out of trouble and don't leave a corpse, but some places refuse to give them rights and treat them as meat that fattens itself up.

And I guess some chimerickens don't need to be killed to harvest their delicious foods. If I even want to go THAT route, anyway...

You know what we need? Malicious, mutant space rats that are pseudo-intelligent. Entire divisions of the corporate super structure are dedicated just to destroying these creatures.

But the real threat? The spacefaring megaroach.

>>1546840
Related?

Bump for Epic Win

Ok, I need to figure out a few more places (so far I've got Wendy's, KFC, Starbucks, Burger King (though I've yet to do anything with it), McDonald's, Domino's and Pizza Hut) and then I can move on.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krispy_Kreme
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunkin%27_Donuts
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Castle_%28restaurant%29
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subway_%28restaurant%29
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snap%2C_Crackle_and_Pop (I already mentioned Captain Crunch and this is one of those out-of-context things)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panda_Express
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_John_Silver%27s
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taco_Bell

Don't need all of them, just thinking.

>>1547280
The only one of those I've never heard of is Panda Express.

As for The Captain and The Triplets, an ocean of milk that is perpetually cold and unable to spoil would be the perfect setting for them. Perhaps islands made of pastries (bread, donuts, cookies, croissants, etc) could dot the landscape. Populate it all with pirates who revere The Captain as if he were Davy Jones, and put The Triplets in the place of the navies of the real world, and this would make a great little world.

Of course, since all the land is made of pastries, the entire planet will, in fact, be owned by Krispy Kreme or Dunkin Donuts (perhaps with the opposite supporting the piracy of The Captain?)

Just some suggestions.

>>1547321
its a chain of Chinese restaurants.

>>1547280

The realm of Taco Bell needs to resemble Mexican hell with The Taco Bell dog as a quite real Cerberus.

>>1547280

Subway needs to be in charge of public (mass) transit. They ferry people around using interstellar trains.

In addition the entire staff should be so cheery and irritating about health related issues that they should be the singular reason people avoid the public transit system.

>As for The Captain and The Triplets, an ocean of milk that is perpetually cold and unable to spoil would be the perfect setting for them.

This can happen. Most of McSphere is metal, but I mentioned thickshake volcanoes etc. earlier and it makes sense that it would always be edible. If anyone asks, it's because of Alkemy and Nanobotz(TM) or something.

And most of the corporations won't be contained in single areas of the toyottasphere, so there can be multiple donut worlds covered in shake oceans with cookie islands or whatever.

New post so I can post the first thing that leaped into my head when I read the word "cookies". OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

>The realm of Taco Bell needs to resemble Mexican hell with The Taco Bell dog as a quite real Cerberus.

I lol'd hard at this. Would illegal immigrants and captured slaves working in sweatshops be a little too racist?

>Subway needs to be in charge of public (mass) transit. They ferry people around using interstellar trains.

Fuck yes. It'd be hard to hand transport to an existing corporation since there are ten fucking million of them, but this I can imagine. Also, trains hanging from ceiling rails and shooting through the toyottasphere at crazy speeds = yes. Portals are also an idea, but perhaps they (like the best food) are only easily accessible by the wealthy and influential.

>In addition the entire staff should be so cheery and irritating about health related issues that they should be the singular reason people avoid the public transit system.

So, I imagined something like a security gate at an airport, only much much larger; passengers can spend days there as they are searched, stripped, given full medical scans, and forced to hand over their possessions for searching and then packing on a completely seperate train for pickup on arrival. Sometimes, Psyonz randomly search the minds of passengers.

Then on the train, they make you read pamphlets about healthy eating and the benefits of regular exercise.

THOSE PUSHY BASTARDS.

>>1547389

I wonder how many saves you need to make for a day at the Subway...

Here's one for the Ausfags.

CHIPPIES!

>>1547469
Oh god, creepist mascot ever? I had nightmares WHEN I WAS.

>>1547389

>>1547484
Counts as Chimericken.

>>1547389

Quest idea
Hired to defend a baggage train from bandits
Or players could attack one

No one bothers to attack the trains with worthless people on it

>>1547575
The players just did.

OH!

Also, counts as KFC

>>1547787
THAT LOOKS NOTHING LIKE A NEGRESS, CITIZEN.

o shi--