I quite enjoyed reading your post, good sir.

>>2: Add nutmeg

CURSE YOU TZEENTCH, CURSE YOU.

100 points sir.

Although the slaanesh one probably needs more frosting on people, as well as a large amount of rolling around in the cake while touching themselves.

>>930594
I guessed it was implied to be part of the mixing

Just as planned.

He forgot the 10,000,000 gallons of bodily fluids for the Slaanesh cake. Also, he forgot the people must have sex atop the cake.

>>930612

I assumed that went without saying.

Nurglecaek should serve 7, but otherwise this is win.

good show anon very good

This is why I love Tzeentch. None of his plans involve me eating shit or swallowing more than six gallons of semen at a time.

Also forgot smothering someone to death with the Khorne cake mixture and smashing their neck with the mixing bowl until their head rolls away.

>>930714
for best results mix inside the skull of a recently defeated foe.

Well Done. Ten Points to Gryffindor.

>>930707

I know!

>>930612
That's what he meant by "gallons of milk"

In the grim darkness of the far future, there are no cows.

>>930707
>>930742
yeah, but think of the nutmeg...

>>930707
Unless they do. You never know...

>>930754
no normal cows from before but there are GRIM AND DARK Deamon cows they are fed orphaned children from refugee ships.

>>930765
Nutmeg is delicious.

Nutmeg!

Thread is win, and deserves a win of olde. Pic related.

>>930818
How DARE you taint My Recipe with your "nutmeg!"

>>930929

It's actually not that bad, filthy mon-keigh.

I'll take two of those Nurgle cakes to leave as an offering for the Orks' altars ... after I set them onfire and leave those at the floor.

I read the Slaanesh one out loud to myself, I couldnt hold a straight face

What, no Zuvassin or Malal recipe?
Shame on you.

>>931204
Mall?

1cup Baking soda
1cup vinegar
Serves 1/2

Zuvassin? I've been in /tg/ forever and I've never heard the name o_O?

>>931223

Zuvassin, Malal, and Necoho, the renegade Chaos gods. No longer canon. Haven't been canon for almost 20 years. GW no longer even owns the rights to some of their names.

He's the Chaos god of bad dice rolls.

Zuvassin cake:

Take one of the other cakes. Replace sugar with salt. Leave for another to eat.

>>931241

Zuvassin, Malal, and Necoho:
1: Take one Squat an

WHFB got slightly confused over the rights to the name Malal as a fourth god... so introduced Necoho and Zuvassi to fill the void during a fluff book ...

Necoho is the chaos god of agnosticism. Zuvassin is like the anti-Tzeench, making sure nothing goes as planned... sorta sod's-law incarnate. And Malal is kinda chaos itself incarnate...

I don't much get the point of Malal as he's described - he gets power from the others getting power, and he's representative of the destruction of everything including chaos itself... he kinda gets covered by the others.

>>931272

Sounds like they made a good move dropping those guys.

>>931272

I like Zuvassi. Malal is shit. Neko-ho is confusing, and sounds like it should be weeaboo.

Zuvassi cake as in >>931254

Malal cake:
1. Bake a cake as instructed.
2. Wait for the other gods to make their cakes.
3. Destroy them all.
4. Repeat with a slightly bigger cake.

Necoho
1. Deny own existence.
2.

.... Yeah, the cakes alone prove Zuvassi is the only worthwhile one.

malal does sound kinda redundant, but unless i'm missing something, isn't chaos undivided kinda necoho's gig?

>>931272
Malal represents chaos's destructive tendencies towards everything, even itself. So when Tzeentch has two plans mess each other up, or when Khornate worshippers start slaughtering each other, or when Nurgle and Slaanesh fight, malal gets stronger

1: TAKE ONE O' DEM CHAOS BOYS CAKES
2: MAKE SURE IT AN'T FRUM DAT NURGLE GIT
3: ADD GUBBINS
4: FROST IT RED SO IT GOES FASTA
5: WAAAAAAAAAGH!

Serves DA MOB

Gork and Mork cakes?

>>932461
Actually, that "WAAAAAAGGGHHH!!" Takes place two hours later, screaming on a toilet.

Wait wait wait. Renegade chaos gods?

How does that even work? Are they all neat and button down?

>>932474

GORK AND MORK CAKE:

1. Bake a cake.
2. Put a chainsaw inside it.
3. Put candles on top, but make sure they're explosive.
4. Give the cake to someone.
5. Have Mork stand behind this someone.
6. Wait for him to light up the candles.
7. Watch as the cake explodes and the corpse rolls over Mork's bent body.
8. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
9. Profit!

>>932499
I know nothing of 40K, so I will concede the point to anybody more knowledgeable who corrects me, but I do know D&D, so if I may use that as an analogy.

Elven communities. Usually Chaoic Good, their Chaos outlook is driven towards absolute freedom. Renegade Chaotic people to them, would be old man Tim, the human who everyday at noon comes to their front gates, shits in his hand, wipes it in his hair, and then does the cossack dance.

>>932499
Chaos actually doesn't mean disorder in some senses of the word. In the case of these deities, it refers more to the primal creative force, as well as the force of basic human instincts, as taken from the Greek deity from which all others sprang. Much like the Gnostic's IAO, but with a certain emphasis on our more animal qualities. Since each Chaos god in the Warhammer universe represents a small selection of humanity's more inhuman qualities, we see where this is an apt association.

>>932461

>>4: FROST IT RED SO IT GOES FASTA

>>932618

Forgot my picture. Fucking hell, I'm failing it today.