My name is Mary.I now own a dungeon.Not by choice, mind you. I was forced into this when the previous owner placed a curse on me after I tried to audit him. Now I'm the ruler of this place until my asshole of a boss decides to send someone to free me from the curse.So, anywhere between a month and forever.But I'm trying to make the most of it while I'm here.And honestly?I'm making a killing.
>>712741Awwww yeah its time for Audit!Sad to see that Mad Curi didn't make the cut but everyone looks so sweet!
>>712741[Enhance Kno - Oh, hey, long time, no see, Mary! Sorry about that, had a client on the other line.
>>712741Here's our assets at the moment.=====G:1005Runes: 9Mana: 41Staff: 5Army: 14Known Runes:WaterFancyStoneComfyExplodeSwordMetalWoodContainerFistClothMagicStringFireMindOilMusicMithrilPsionicLevitationWind===Items===Chests: G10Food: Good- G10, Excellent- G20===Basic Units===Builder: Can build rooms. Can also construct hallways for the dungeon and fill any space with basic traps. (Purchased) Cook: Cooks food. Boosts morale for other units. (Purchased)Dungeoneer: Builds magical traps and manages the Army. Can also infuse demons with more runes. (Purchased)===Advance Units===Archiver: Upgrade to Librarian. Can transmute runes. G-600 (Purchased)Carpenter has been unlocked. This will halve the price for all rooms. Costs G300 (Purchased)Chef has been unlocked. Cooks food better. G100. (Purchased)Demonologist II: Can fuse two runes together to create an Opposite Rune. G-3000. Minus 50 for each rune known.===Basic Rooms===Kitchen: G-200 BOUGHTBarracks: G200 BOUGHTEmpty Room: G50Treasure Room: G100===Advance Rooms===Mini-Boss Room: G100Final Boss Room: G1000False Final Boss Room: G500 (Must contain a trap of some kind)Trapped Room: G75 (Requires Builder)Magical Trap: G100 (Requires Dungeoneer)False Wall: G25 (Requires Dungeoneer)Note: Rooms are furnished with the bare minimum. They can be enhanced with runes.=====Our dungeon has evolved quite a bit since it's initial inception.2/3
>>712771However, the state of the dungeon and it's assets aren't my current problem.No, what's really bothering me is this girl, Alex."I'm sorry if I've come at a bad time Ms. King of Demons but we really do need to talk about this loan.""I'm not the king of demons. I'm not even a demon, let alone the ruler of them.""You're in charge of the dungeon, right?""Yes, but-""And it has demons. That sounds pretty ruler-like.""No, I was forced into this by-""I know our repayment plans can be a bit restrictive at times but I'm here to find a solution that works for both of us."
>>712811Oh right. I forgot about her.
>>712811Welp. Time to try and explain our situation. Explain that we were/are employees of the bank and that we were forced into this. The man they are looking for is who knows where right now. It isn't exactly our debt.Also, when she inevitably denies this. We should ask about the debt itself. Because we'll need to know how deep a hole we are in...
>>712811Wow Deja-vuComplete the circle Mary
>>712811Put the debt onto her! Free yourself from this pain!
>>712811let her finish talking. the explain an asshole GAVE you their debt and then ran away.
>>712811What is our current payment plan? Plus when is our tax return, we should have gotten that by now.
>>712811Okay lay down on me. How much is the damage. I forgot how much the old king demon owned.
>>712811SO MUCH DEJA VU. MARY, START BITCHING ABOUT YOUR PREDICAMENT. VENT THAT STRESS!
>>712811Can't we use mana to summon a lawyer
>>712811Alex, is Mary still an employee of Darachma bank?
>>712811Tell it straight. "I'm an Auditor." Then explain the real King of Demons forced you into the leadership position of the dungeon. You are trapped here.If she insists on telling you the loan has transferred to you, ask her to get it in writing, from a lawyer.
>>712811Yeah the previous guy cursed me to take his place, however I am immune to his debt as anyone with half a brain would . Additionally I called my boss (insert jackass name here) and he has obviously forgotten about me and replaced me already. I really should sue.
Wait just a second if we pay the debt as the Demon King. Does that mean the dungeon will be actually ours?
>>712811Hey, Mary, she'd make a good princess character, you know...Just something to consider.
>>712811Invite her to a business dinner.
>>712878Probably. And I can't say I am against that. But we're going to argue our case.
>>712811Make her the ruler of the dungeon, like that one guy did to you!Alternatively tell her to give your boss from your job a call, make him sort it out. Last resort you have all the litigation and lawsuits to file to stop them from collecting until the original guy comes back (Inhibiting your freedom, transferring ownership without consent, etc. He's basically attacked you by putting you in this position, they can't collect while the ownership rights of his/your dungeon are in legal limbo can they?)Alternatively kidnap her, she's the same class as you, worst that happens is you keep stealing eachothers stuff until your both out of mana. Best result you get another friend/minion to help manage this place (the last option comes super recommended)
>>712811Mary use mana to SUMMON LAWYER too help! If nothing else but to reiterate what was said in the last thread.
>>712811Pretty lazy identity check there. I'd hope that Drachma Bank would have higher standards than that. Certainly Mary, you did a much better job when you confronted the previous King of Demons.If she won't listen, then try to remember if there are any Fair Debt Collection laws or regulations that might protect you. No matter what, it's unreasonable for her to collect debt from someone without trying to confirm their identity.
>>712811Complain that you're her coworker!Then be sad when she informs you of your firing for violating the clause of your employment policy that stimulates you not hold other jobs.Also, you're clearly in violation of the conflict of interest policy. Why didn't you disclose that you were the King of Demons the required 5 weeks in advance of the King of Demons signing on for the loan? Legal could have checked everything out and it would likely have been fine. Hiding the facts helps no one, and there's a 20% penalty fee....
>>712878>>712888>>712893See you're going the wrong way.Nobody OWNS the dungeon, and if anyone does, it's us. Why? Because it was GIFTED to us by the Demon King.Thing is, the debt is still for HIM, it's not like you can give that kind of shit to people and just get away scot-free.Otherwise, real-estate would be insane (you could liquidate your debt by just selling any kind of property and say "tag, you're it!".>>712921This anon has the right idea.
If I had access to the spell that trapped me here in the first place I wouldn't even be in this situation right now, would I?My actual spells are pretty limited."Look, Alex, here's the thing... I'm not supposed to be here. I'm an auditor, just like you. We work for the same company. I'm Mary. I'm sure our boss must have-""Aah... You're Mary?""You heard about me?""Yeah. Now, about the payment plans.""No! No payment plans! This isn't my debt! I'm being trapped here against my will! I-""Sometimes people panic, and if I were in your situation I would too. Especially considering your debt is so high.""... What was it again?""159,000 gold."OhRight.1/3
>>712935Oh fuck me...that's high.
>>712935Offer to pay interests only for next 3 millenias.
>>712935Use a lawyer to fuck her up legally
>>712935What's the daki to cold current exchange rate?
>>712935Yeah, let's kidnap her.Welcome to the downward spiral of debt, Alex. should have found a better job.
>>712935"It really is a high amount... Especially since you lost your other job at Drachma Bank... With the whole secondary employment clause in your contract...""WHAT!?""But I believe in you..."2/3
>>712964Welp he's dead.
>>712929Oh god... we're doomed, the only thing left is to offer your body as payment.>>712935Aren't WE technically still the auditor for this operation? (and likely senior auditor), can't we quickly make our own payment plan and approve it so she has to go through the paperwork to get OUR plan revoked so she can make her own? We can use that time to prepare lawyers and stuff to throw the debt into limbo and get the original guy marked.Also WTF did he do to rack up that much debt? This place started with 4 pillars>>712964That fucker fired us?! We can still backdate the payment plan can't we?
Okay, we're mailing That Guy a ticket for an all-expenses-paid trip to the famous Slimecrown Citadel Spa. And then we're throwing him in the basement.
>>712964Oh it's on like donkey Kong now! After we set up the first floor and finalize it we need to send in monsters to that asshole of a boss office.
>>712964Fuck that guy. So much...
>>712964Someone's getting fed testicles first to the Secret Boss.
>>712935>>712964that TEARS IT! I've had it with that Business! I WANT TO BURN DOWN THAT BUSINESS AND MAKE THEM GO BANKRUPT!
>>712985Remember the literal fuck-ton of succubi? Or I Can't Believe The Cute Girl Next Door Is Azathoth, King of The Cosmos?Fiscal responsibility and him weren't exactly on good terms.
>>712964Fuck this go mental Entrench this place so we can kill any debt collectors and also be self sufficient
>>712985The guy bought a shitload of runes and used a lot of them to make a succubus harem and the throne room and the basement monster.
>>712985Spent all his money making LUCY a BEST
>>7129854 pillars, succubus hookers, and Jeffrey in the Basement.
>>712964Well, I guess it's here, guys. The time when Mary finally gives up being pure and decides to go Full Demon.
>>712964Actually we weren't notified our contract had been terminated were we? As long as we dodge all their calls we can still claim that we haven't been fired yet. They should have our call to him on record where he said he'd help us and we explained our situation.
>>712985>Aren't WE technically still the auditor for this operation?Well apparently we got fired for having "two jobs".
>>712964explain drachma bank did not send you a notice of dismissal, write up a payment plan, and approve it. you are now required to pay 1 gold a month with 0 APR.
>>713044We were contacted via phone, but we rune'd the phone in rage. And since they tried calling, they're gonna be assholes and assume we received the message anyways so they can continue racking up the debt like the Jew class they are.
>>712964WHAT THE FUCK!?I'VE BEEN A LOYAL EMPLOYEE THERE FOR -YEARS-!HE CAN'T JUST FIRE ME!THAT'STHAT'SEVIL!"Are you okay Ms. King of Demons?"AND THIS BITCH."SUMMON LAWYER!">Mary casts her most powerful spell and summons a lawyer on the field."Oh wow," Alex says, "That's a powerful lawyer... But, I'm an Auditor too... Summon Lawyer!">She summons her own lawyer. The pair lock eyes and begin arguing with one another."I see you think that perhaps this doesn't apply to you... But, all the Auditing Universe cares about is proper paperwork and filing... And according to the files this debt belongs to you... I don't care how but that's how it is... So, can we discuss payment plans?"3/4
The pure and wholesome RAGE within grows.
new plan for audit: turn the whole world into a dungeon and let Mary's slime army lay waste to it. And also make her former boss into a a slime controlled puppet.
>>712964We have meet the final boss
>>713058Yeah the phone thing was my bad.
>>713059Heh those lawyers...
>>713059>And according to the files this debt belongs to you...Is the debt attributed to the "King of Demons" title or to the individual?Actually, can we see those files?
>>713059CRUSH THIS BITCH
>>712964Throw your old boss under the bus."That's odd. I was ordered to do this as PART of my job at Drachma Bank.All further contact will be through my lawyer.So, for purposes of determining your personal liability for the coming wrongful termination lawsuit, could you please contact my lawyer and let him know how much are you currently being paid?"
>>713059Is this the Dark Age of Auditing?
>>712935That's definitely illegal. We were forced to stay in the dungeon without our consent by the previous owner. There was no mention of transferring the debt; he simply gave the dungeon to us and ran off. That means this place is legally ours, and the debt is still his.>>712964I'm pretty sure this is also illegal. As an employee, we are entitled to protection from magical curses, and he failed to provide assistance in a timely manner despite our specific request. That means he failed to abide by the contract, not us. We have a phone conversaion as evidence.>>713059Now that is just flat-out fraud. There's no law that says you can just declare someone else a debtor in your place.
>>713059Can we discuss this in the spa?
>>713059Force her to join us in some kind of legal loophole
>>713059>And according to the files this debt belongs to youNo, it's got a different name on the files. This is Mary. Not the King of Demons. Being in charge of the dungeon does not change your name.
>>712961>kidnap>>712893>kidnap....................>Mary struggles with dark thoughts.
>>713059OBJECTION!>Mary already said that debt transference isn't a thing that the Demon King could have done. However, it is possible that the property we are presently bound to by his magic would go under something called "fraudulent conveyance".In short, the Demon King gave us this property and then fled to avoid paying his taxes, putting his property out of the hands of his creditors. Depending on the legal statute of the realms, such an intentional way to defraud the system may be considered insufficient to protect the property from foreclosure, liquidation, or anything of that sort to help the initial investor recoup their losses.Basically, the Demon King's debt isn't on us, but it may be on the dungeon. However, two problems arise from this. First is that in effect of his means of conveyance of the property, the demon king deprived us of our personal liberties and put us in a hostile situation with no means of escape, meaning that he can be sued in a court of law for reckless endangerment (a felonious infraction), deprivation of personal liberties (a felonious infraction), and personal damages.In such cases, criminal procedure overtakes civil procedure (such as debt collection), putting a halt to all other liens against his property until the case has been resolved. Reparations can then be easily named in the millions of gold, and should he not arrive to defend himself in a court of law within a certain number of days once we've put up a trial for the appeal, we can easily have him forfeit his former, reclaimable properties for immediate, grievous damages before the banks can foreclose on anything. This would effectively discharge the debt while netting us the property.The second is that the dungeon itself was a derelict structure beforehand possessed of a dangerous, extremely pernicious entity which would have made its original pricing negative. In short, the property without the added value that Mary has added, which she, by all rights could send back to start before leaving to return the property in initial condition, would not be worth reclaiming.In short, the bank lost this one from the second the Demon King stuck us here. They can go chasing his bony ass across the abyss for whatever gold they can wring out of him. The dungeon is ours, the debt is his, and if they try to take our home, they'll have ashes instead.Do. Not. Fuck. With. Mary.
>>713059Agree to nothing Have everything done by lawyer
>>713095You're the demon queen now. Time to act like one.
>>713059Counter her argument that criminal charges take precedence and the collection services are to desist until a verdict has been reached.
>>713095They'll stop sending us aduitors if they keep losing them, and we just claim we never saw them. We couldn't [possibly pay our debt if they never informed us of it
>>713098Hint we may wave this if we enter into negotiations, on site, with our former boss.
>>713095Do it. You know you want to.
>>713095Just kidnap her, Mary. You want her to stop bugging you about this loan that is not yours, and we want a new character to abuse.
>>713059"That's quite literally impossible. I signed no contracts for this debt, and the lien is against another person.That means your paperwork is NOT properly filed.I will be suing over this, and the wrongful termination. I'm sure that Drachma bank is aware that the discovery alone in these cases is several million, long before we even get to the court case itself!"
>>713059>So, can we discuss payment plans?"Don't even consider it until after proof is provided showing proper paperwork is in order. Surely debt cannot be legally transferred without a contract or court order. The fact that she's calling Mary by the "Ms. King of Demons" title despite knowing her real name, just shows how hard she's trying to force this matter.And don't promise to do it after said paperwork is shown, either. She'll try to make that binding.
>>713096Go with this one.
>>713058Wouldn't it be like serving a court attendance notice? Someone has to sign off that they gave you notice in order for it to be binding right? If they don't serve us sign of job termination, then considering their awareness of circumstances, even if we don't accrue hourly wages, they haven't fired us yet? (I'm probably being optimistic)>>713084>>713092>>713096We've also got these going for us... but lets send some slimes to stop her escape just in case (Alternatively seduce her! Or have someone else seduce her!)Also, Mary's boss probably through her under the bus and just signed all the papers that would make the job easier for him. We need to spite sue him.
We need more lawyers !!!Summon as many as possible And dont even dare discuss "payment plans"That can be taken as accepting the debt
>>713095Which is it going to be?>Law route, use our knowledge of the laws to bankrupt our former boss.>Chaos route, start a real dark army and kidnap her.
Wait, wait. King of Demons? Aren't we clearly a QUEEN of Demons?
>>713095Tempting as it is. Be good. Hold it in.
Rip those caterpillar brows off her face and hold them hostage.
>>713095Let's wait on that for now....for now.What payment plans are she talking about? Maybe it won't be soul-crushingly horrible.
Wait hang on... can't we just sell the dungeon to the bank? It's definitely worth 159k by now, since it's bringing in like 1k a day or something ridiculous like that.Selling the dungeon would free Mary since she can't be trapped if the dungeon doesn't exist, right? Of course she'd be unemployed after that, but then she could sue the bank for wrongful termination, probably.
>>713095cast bankrupt on her while claiming her job counts as an itemif you think it hard enough it may work.
>>713148Better yet, use her as a material link so that she can cast it upon the bank itself. What could possibly go wrong?
>>713144Fuck that the dungeons ours.
Declare her an adventurer
>>713148Not enough mana, anon.
>>713129>Neutral route, just make a lot of gold and instead of paying back the debt BUY the company, FIRE our old boss, and terminate our debt.>>713148>>713157Can we Steal her job/the bank?
>>713159Send her to the FUN room.
Watch out: Drachma Bank might be recording this interaction, possibly even without the knowledge of either party.Actually, when this is done, you might want to sweep for any nasty surprises your asshole boss might have left on you, any possessions you brought to the dungeon with you, and any dungeon areas the new auditor was in.
>>713144Who let this guy into the crown?
>>713095I'd like to say be sympathetic, since she's just an employee and she's currently in the same position you were in.On the other hand, she's blatantly trying to defraud you, despite knowing you're not the actual King of Demons.So, here's the plan. Try to get her to relax. You know how stressful the job can be, so discuss the issue over a nice dinner. Then ask to see the documents for the loan. And proof that she's an actual Drachma Bank employee.
>>713096Do this with your lawyer as a stand.
>>713188The benefit of the crown is to hear ALL possibilities and paths and make the best choice among them... what would happen if you runed the crown?[SPOILER]DOIT!DOIT!DOIT![/SPOILER]
>>713059>>713095GOD FUCKING DAMNIT! NO! NO! NO!I am not getting cockblocked on a sound legal argument that I structured last thread. This universe cannot be that fucking retarded. Otherwise, every wizard would just accrue a mountain of debt on some poor schlubs name and run off. It DOESN'T work like that. It CANNOT work like that. So, tell that bitch to shove it because I won't accept in-universe selective retardation as a fucking excuse.
>>713095>>713096Yeah, not only do they not have a claim against us but we can take the dungeon from them long before they have the chance to foreclose on it.Offer to buy they debt from Drachma Bank for 200 gold, it's probably more than they could get from the King of Demons. You might even be willing to drop the unlawful termination lawsuit if they get the curse removed in a timely manner like they're contractually obligated to do anyway.
>>713195Apply Olivia to act as [s]literal[/s] social lubrication
Another Fun Possibility is that the King of Demons was in on it. Maybe this is a scam being run by your boss to force people into huge debt, by luring Auditors like yourself into dungeons so that they can be cursed like you were. Maybe your boss is the King of Demons, even.
>>713214Wow. That'd be evil.
>>713095Woah woah. Mary. Calm down. I want you to think about this calmly and ask yourself one question.What would Dungeoneer do?
>>713203Why wouldn't in universe retardation be an excuse, if everyone is stupid it doesn't matter how dumb the laws are.
If you we use our spell on the CEO/major shareholder of a company, what happens to the shares?
>>713203It's probably wizards that write the laws. It's a conspiracy.
>>713096This. Thanks for reposting anon.
>>713214That sounds so stupid and convoluted that knowing Larro, would be exactly what had happened.
..."Let's discuss this in my chambers.""Excellent." The girl visibly relaxes now that the conversation is going her way.Alright, no kidnapping.YetI don't know why I thought about doing that. I think the demonic air is getting to me. There's no reason we can't be civil here.>Mary has Alex brought to a dining area and orders the Maid and Butler slimes to bring them some refreshments. Mary once again tries to explain her current situation.>You know, how she's basically held here against her will by a curse and the one who originally had the debt has run away.>Which, you remind her, is illegal."I agree with you on that. However," She pushes a piece of paper forward. "The debt is not attached to Atrociatus Maldorium, the previous King of Demons. No, it is in fact attached to the title of King of Demons. That title now belongs to you and with it the debts accrued by that title. Your dungeon is a business Ms. King of Demons and you are the one currently in charge of it... Just because the last boss left it in bad shape doesn't mean we can just forget the large amount of money he has borrowed from-""Okay, got it. Charging the one in charge of the dungeon, not me. Get it. But, here's the thing, and I -really- want you to keep this in mind, okay? So, just pay attention real quick... I AM NOT HERE WILLINGLY. I AM ESSENTIALLY KIDNAPPED. MY BOSS WAS SUPPOSED TO LET ME OUT! THE AMOUNT OF LEGAL FUCKUPERY GOING ON HERE WOULD GIVE ME ENOUGH LEEWAY TO SUE DRACHMA BANK INTO FUCKING OBLIVION."1/2
>>713251I knew some bullshit-ery would happen the moment Larro decided to uses selective retardation on lawyering. >>713260Forcing a class/job change on other people is illegal!
>>713260".......... Ma'am I'm going to have to ask you to keep your voice down. I don't appreciate being yelled out. Now if we can just go over the payment plans I would really appreciate that."
>>713285Fuck it, sue them.
>>713285This is just getting us to talk around in circles. Supposing we did comply with payment plans. What exactly would she propose?
>>713285Welp, time to tie her up and beat her with a sock full of coins. Bureaucrats cannot be reasoned with.
>>713285TOUGH! Deal with it! We should have called the cops about this.
>>713285Alright, fuck her."Sure, we can do that. We'll have plenty of time since you are never leaving this place."
>>713285GET IN THE SACK NOW
>>713285Im sorry but do you even realise where you are miss, you are in a fucking "Evil lair" and you dont even seem to care we could oh i dont knowKIDNAP HER
>>713285KIDNAP HER!DENY ALL KNOWLEDGE OF HER EXISTENCE!TELL ANY INVESTIGATORS OR COPS THEY ARE FREE TO CHECK THE FUCKING BASEMENT IF THEY WANT!
>>713285Y'know what? Let's hear them. Just so we have something to laugh madly at. I think we could all use a good old fashion maniacal laugh, huh?
>>713285LET THE KIDNAPPING BEGINRUTH GET IN HERE
>>713285Sue them.>>713296Out of the question.
>>713285...(Places crown on her head)You are now temporarily in charge of the dungeon, Alex. Try not to fuck up our hard work.
>>713285No. Get my old boss and your current one down here. Now. Otherwise I am calling the cops, AND suing Drachma bank for everything it's worth. This is me being civil, keep pushing, and I will show you what being unpleasant is.
>>713285Resist the urge to do anything evil. Kidnapping is illegal, and they'll just send someone else in her place. We aren't a bad guy and we don't want to give them any legal leverage against us.
>>713285I mean, to be fair you'd be acting the exact same way as her, Mary.But kidnap her anyway. Dungeoneer wastes the most time, so she can be on prison guard duty.
>>713285No. Tell her you're just going to sue the bank for breach of contract and wrongful termination. The legal fees associated with the court case will be our payment plan.
>>713285So what's she's saying is it's perfectly legal for us to forcefully employ her underneath us is what I'm saying. We just have to keep her kidnapped long enough for them to fire her too? Makes sense. Wow, this Alex has some really evil ideas, you should take her advice and kidnap and forcefully employ her.
>>713285FINE. Keep in mind, this is a Business, and the interests that you put upon this RESIST THE URGE OF EVIL MARY. RESIST! YOU KNOW HOW DRACHMA BANK WORKS, YOU WERE THEIR FORMER EMPLOYEE!
>>713285Make her Olivia's rare drop. I'm sure she'll be comfy staying in there for a while.
>>713285Put her in charge of a dungeon! See how she likes it!Or better yet, kidnap her.
>>713285If you're trapped in the dungeon it's not like they can arrest you for not paying. Just tell her to leave.
>>713260>>713285First of all, you cannot, I repeat CANNOT separate a debt onto a title. Otherwise, people could accrue debt and just retire the mantle. It's even easier to defraud the system in that way. Hell, Mary, just call yourself something different and you are effectively no longer the same person. CASE IN POINT: THIS DOES NOT WORK FOR A LEGAL PRECEDENT!So, no, stop. She is wrong if this society possesses even an iota of sanity. Also, counterpoint, even in the case she is right, we can easily have the company sued into the ground for millions due to effectively knowingly orchestrating slavery and kidnapping, as well as extortion at this point. They've already done it. There is no going back. They have definitively broken the fucking law, and we can sue them into the fucking ground with the worst lawyer imaginable.Now then, since they've gone this far, since they wouldn't play fucking reasonable, they are now going to GIVE us the fucking dungeon, or we will END them.
>>713338You have such an elegant way of putting things.
>>713285declare her the king of demons for 5 minutes. whoops she is no longer an auditor, whoops five minutes are up no she has no jobs.
>>713285Engage demon mode Mary! Start an evil crusade against the bank.
>>713285I guess we can hear her out, but we have a legal interest in abstaining from officially agreeing to any payment plan, as doing so would imply consent to this situation.I'm curious, what would happen if the bank doesn't get its payments? Would the bank foreclose and claim the dungeon? Would doing so remove Mary of the title that's been forced upon her?Depending on the answer, the bank would essentially be facilitating an abduction.
>>713357I'm a fan of the "refuse to listen to any payment plans". If this legal system is as stupid as it seems, us hearing the payment plans probably qualifies as de-facto accepting the debt they refer to.
>>713338I like that idea. I second it!
>>713357They are in the process of facilitating slavery and extortion. They are, while knowing full well that Mary is a victim put in these circumstances by them with no means of leaving, telling her that she must work or face cruel and unusual punishment. They are and already have, broken the laws of any civil society.
>>713363>us hearing the payment plans probably qualifies as de-facto accepting the debt they refer to.Now that you've said it, that seems remarkably plausible.
>>713285BEGIN LAWSUIT SUMMON SLIME JUDGE
>>713285She's just trying to get you to admit they have a claim against you, Mary. It's SOP for people with dead relatives. Whatever you do, don't say anything that could be construed as such an admission.>>713320>>713338Declaring her our new employee and temporarily putting her in charge of the dungeon so she can't deny that fact so she'll get fired is a decent idea, too.
>>713285Secretly finalize the dungeon layout. Let in the next wave of adventurers. Alex is now bound by the dungeon as a minion. She must survive the next raid. Since this automatically forces her job to switch to minion of the dungeon instead of Drachma employee.
>>713285>713285Enforce slime hugs every time she tries to say the word 'Payment Plan'
>>713285Mary, kidnap her and make her pose for a Dakimakura! You're evil now, you don't gotta put up with this shit.
>>713382This also means DO NOT TALK ABOUT PAYMENT PLANS.
>>713285>>713338Ah right. We can also just hire her.
>>713372Why do you think she keeps asking "can we talk about payment plans now?" instead of just talking about them? At least that's my thought.
>>713348If the contract was written that way, then that further implies that this is a scam and the King of Demons was in on it.While suing the bank we need to hire a private investigator to track down the former owner of the dungeon so we can prove he conspired with the bank.
>>713385This is dirty, I like.
>>713385>>713285Also, eh, sure.
>>713385Genius. Make it so.
>>713385MAKE IT SO
>>713285FOR THE LOVE OF SLIME DO NOT DISCUSS PAYMENT PLAN
>>713285I don't know guys, I agree that this is really shitty in terms of how laws work but I'm not sure revolting against the premise is really gonna get us anywhere.Mary, you've been auditing for years now. Are the laws actually this stupid?
Mary, you have to understand we're not doing this JUST to be evil. We really think this is bullshit, and we really like you, so we don't want you to get screwed over.>>713432Seconding this question.
>>713285Bring in the massage slime
>>713432The answer is that no, they are not, because that is fucking retarded. Second, at this point, all we have to do is tell her to go to the local authorities and report this kidnapping case. Again, we can throw this whole goddamn thing on its head the second we make this a criminal case (which the company Mary used to work for is now directly implicated in).
>>713432If they are we can literally just kidnap her and enslave her as a dungeon minion. She then becomes repossessable property as part of the dungeon.
Try not to kidnap herTry not to kidnap herTry not to kidnap herTry not to kidnap herTry not to kidnap herKidnap her
>>713464This plan is sensible and boring. I support it but we all know we are going to kidnap her.
>>713464I don't know why your so obsessed with thinking that the law is the same here and in real life, the law can be this fucking retarded because it is that fucking retarded.
>>713464You're assuming that this bizarre magic world even has police or centralized government. While we know that they have bureacracy, they could still be pretty shitty in terms of human rights.
>>713432They're normally not this stupid!And I'm giving her one last chance before I just stick in her jail or a pit of comfy slimes or something."No, I'm not talking about payment plans! Do you realize how stupid this is!? How ripe for abuse this system is!? That means I could literally just toss the mantle onto someone else and force them to take on the debt!""Well, normally you can't... There's this whole process to transfer such things but since he used a spell to transfer it he was able to skip all of the paperwork. If you look here it's detailed in-""No! That's ridiculous! Society does not work that way! It SHOULDN'T work that way! You guys should be helping me track this person down! You should be helping me get free!""I'm sorry but that's not in my job description... Now, if you'd like, we could begin discussing these payment plans. I think you'll find them-""NO! It's dumb, you're dumb, the whole thing is dumb! I'm an Auditor, I know how this is supposed to work, I shouldn't even have to worry about this! If this is how it works I could just make you into my minion! Right now! Cause you're in my dungeon and I'm running the thing!""Well, no that's not quite how it-""Well why shouldn't it!? IF YOU CAN JUST DECLARE PEOPLE HAVING TITLES AND THE LAW ACCEPTS IT WHY CAN'T I JUST DO THAT TO YOU!? You know what, I'm doing it! You work for me now! There, how do you like that!?""I don't consent to this trading of titles.""Don't care! Already did it! Welcome aboard! See how that feels!? That's exactly what happened to me! Now, you get our boss down here right now and-"1/2
>>713495Hey, I listed plenty of reasonable stuff to diffuse this situation. When that inevitably fails, we are locking her in the dungeon with us.>>713510>>713512I'm aware that Larro can just Rule Zero any argument, but that's a boring abuse of power and makes the background of the world dysfunctional.
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>713514YES RUTH YESSMASH
>>713514Ruth, knock the auditor.
>>713514Do it, Ruth.DO IT.
>>713510It becomes so inceredibly abusable tho.Anyway, i have a plan for what she can be used for to draw a new type of adventurer!Spread word that the slimes of the Citadel have captured and imprisoned the fair princess of a distant kingdom! Do they hav ethe courage and skill to rescue this fair maiden from the sticky, goopy clutches of the mother of SLIMES?!
>>713522Ah yes the glorious background of.....
>>713514Oh, fuck, this is going to end with them levying an assault suit on us for Ruth giving her the *clonk* as an automated response to our rage, isn't it?
>>713514>Now, you get our boss down here right now and-"Uh...Mary, why are you telling her to bring you down there?
>>713514Good idea Mary, set up so you can plead insanity in the court case. "spell induced stress caused minor bouts of insanity" seems a fair defense, you can't LEGALLY hold a debt you aren't mentally able to understand right?Also Ruth, might be best to knock them both out.
>>713514>but since he used a spell to transfer it he was able to skip all of the paperwork.Then you "signed" the "paperwork" under duress and it's null and void.
>>713514>Alex's phone rings.>She answers it."... Boss?""Heeeey, Alex, it's me. Your boss. Couldn't help but notice you got a new job at the Slimecrown Citadel! Super happy for you. But you know our policy on working for our customers. Sorry, you're fired.""What?""But I hope you have fun at your new job! Toodles~!">He hangs up."..."".... Ah, shit. I uh... I didn't think that would actually work. You know, someone really should fix that.""........"
>>713603HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'M DYIN' HOLY SHIT
>>713514>>713588This. You CANNOT transfer titles/debt/anything without consent.>>713603What the fuck?
>>713514>>713603BRAVO MARY. BRAVO!
>>713603Hahaha, get wrecked.
>>713603Criminally negligent boss is best boss.
>>713603I'm a bit jealous. He seems a lot more on the ball with Alex.It's blatant favouritism.
>>713603LAUGH AT HERREJOICEGIVE HER THE CROWN TOO, MARYTAKE A BREAK, WE'LL GIVE HER A BEATING
>>713603"SEE?! SEE WHAT THE LAW DOES?!Anyways, here's a free ticket to the spa, go relax while I do the paperwork for your new job. Which is... something. I'll think abut it."
>>713603WAKE ME UP!
>>713603Wait, stop Ruth from hitting her now.
>>713603Ahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha!Do you understand now?Now get suited up. There is a dress code.
>>713603you know we could probably just hire every auditor they send at us until the bank has no employees.
>>713603"...You know, we have health care. Even free visits to our company spa."
>>713603You're in for the long haul now, friend.
>>713603Well shit. Guess we have to find a job for her."Sooooo, Alex. What skills can you bring to the table?"
>>713627WAKE ME UP INSIDE!
>>713603"Gimme that phone for a moment."As soon as you get the phone, make your ex boss your employee.As soon as he's fired from the bank, send him into the basement and fire him from the dungeon.
>>713603No, This is perfect! We'll keep kidnapping Auditors and then eventually, Alex will be the only one left. At which point we appoint him the title "Official door mat of Slimecrown Citadel"!
>>713624A living warning for when they send the next prospective minion to us to try and arrang ea payment plan.
>>713644>>713627CANT WAKE UP.
>>713603OH NOOOOOOh well tell her if she actually wants to work for you, I'm sure we can find something for her to do. Would she object to becoming a demon and working as one of the minions here? Or she could act as your representative to the outside world since we can't actually leave.
Maybe we can leverage this. Can we like, seize ownership of the bank somehow?
>>713603excellent. assign her to work with the archiver sorting the runes.
>>713650Sorry meant "Boss"
>>713603Be smug. Show the smug. You have all the right to be smug.
>>713647So much this.
>>713659no, even better, she can be our accountant! Put her auditing skills to use! Mary is in charge of Dungeon design as the Dungeon Manager/master
>>713666Is there a way to be smug and sympathetic at the same time?Because that's kinda what I'm feeling.
But yeeeeeeeeah, kinda sorry about that actually.Theyll probably send payment requests via carrier pigeon or something now.
>>713657Tell everybody at the bank they're hired until they're all fired?
>>713603Call him back and we can hire him too!>>713627>This whole scene was actually a nightmare
>>713647>>713656>>713667>>713673He hung up, nerds.
>>713603Gotta say though, this is fantastic.
aHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahhaaaa... but yeah, we're gonna have to do something about that debt eventually. Don't want them to just take our dungeon...
>>713647Not sure if that will work, but we should try that.
>>713603Okay, this is just stupid. When we were cursed, he at least acted like he was trying to solve the problem. This is just blatantly stupid.You know what? I'm pretty sure this is part of his plan. He saw how successful you were in your new job and he's trying to squeeze you for money. The only reason he's doing this now is to stick with the whole "non-consensual employment is totally legit" pretense so it'll look like he actually has some legal claim on you.What we need to do is talk to Alex and learn what he was planning. Did he tell her anything? Don't act like she's the enemy here; she's just doing job. It's the legal system and your ex-boss that are the bad guys.
WAITWAITWAITIf we can just kidnap/hire Alex, and possibly other auditors...Can we kidnap/hire our boss?...Alex, hand me your phone. (calls up boss)...HEY ASSHOLE! I SEE YOU LOOK LIKE A PRETTY GOOD TRAP TESTER AND JANITOR! YOU'RE HIRED IMMEDIATELY, YOU MISERABLE DICKHEAD!
"Okay, since you work for me now and I am still quite angry... you get to wear... the skimpy costume and attend the gift shop."
>>713691That and I bet that the guy doesn't have that dual employment clause. It would be too easy.
Let's keep doing this till the bigwigs show up so we can make them into our minions as well and perform a hostile takeover of the company.
>>713705Not unless he enters the dungeon and it not an adventureer.
People, for God's sake, it was said right there by US that it only worked because this auditor was physically in the dungeon.Besides, if we did have those powers, there's a fair chance our... FORMER.... boss knows about them, and has blocked that number ASAP.
>>713691Phone him back then.
>>713691Yes. It's a pity cell phones can only ever be used once.
>>713726Hes not gonna answer. He is in on this shit.
"Sooooo... What kinda skills do you have?">Alex responds by crying."I'm fired!?" She yells, extending the word with a chocking sob."Yeah. Again, kinda sorry about that.""But this isn't r-right! Y-you can't just make me do this! I h-had a j-job and I w-w-was gonna go to the t-t-toooooop!""Yeah, you see how-""This is wrong! I can't believe he just fired me! I didn't want this! I just wanted to get the moneeeeeyyyy!""... Okay, you know I'm trying to feel sorry for you. Really am. But it's getting hard when you're saying THE EXACT STUFF I WAS JUST SAYING TO YOU."1/2
Oh, you should also probably apologise for accidentally getting her fired too. You're not evil yet, you just got caught up in legal bullshit. (rune her phone, we need to make it so that the only way people can contact us is by entering the dungeon).
If they're charging the debt to the King of Demons can't Mary just open a new position like "The God Emperor of Demons" and pawn off the King title to someone else?
>>713738Great, now you made her cry...
>>713738BITCH SLAP HER. YELL AT HER TO "GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!"
>>713738Hey, Mary. As her first job, have her pose for a Daki.
>>713738Im dying. You are killing me Larro. My sides.
It's like talking to a mirror. A dimwitted, oblivious mirror.Hey, do we have any empty cursed mirrors lying around?
...wait a minute how did he find out so fast? Is she wearing a wire? You better check her for hidden microphones and scrying effects and shit!
>>713738So she was just intentionally ignoring our side of the situation the whole time?Fuck sympathy send her work already
>>713738Wow, were you this much of a pussy? Bitch needs to learn some respect. For you. Backhand that ho.
Hold on. The debt is attached to the title "King of Demons", but since Mary is a woman and identifies as one, wouldn't that mean that she is the Queen of Demons?
>>713738Oilivia should come in and lend a hand. And some other comfy attendants to help calm her down.
>>713738Let's get you to the Spa, alright? Might as well show you our amenities and benefits for working for us.
>>713738Don't blame her for this. She's just a messenger who got caught up in this mess.Hand her a body pillow. Hugging it will help her calm down.
>>713750yes, new people = new dakis
>>713738Holy crap, she's flatter than demonologist.With both in the same room, the average cup size will be near 0.
>>713738...Sigh.Okay, yeah, it's out of my system. Now I kinda feel bad. Really, though, it's clearly abuseable. And look, she wants to do things? I kinda like the idea of her being our outside rep as said here. >>713653She can be the one who goes outside and buys stuff for us. Lets her still have a social life and everything.
>>713759It's a title. It cares not who holds it.
>>713759may be declared and gender neutral title given some of the monsters that can control a dungeon im mean do skellis even have a gender after all?
>>713738>I just wanted to get the moneeeeeyyyy!ok, ditch this gold digger, out out out!
>>713738Keep your title but give your debt to her, and have her work off the debt. Do the same with every non-adventure that wanders in here.especially with people that are named Tali.
>>713738She's a fucking moron and a whiny one at that... Still, she's an auditor and has spells. She also isn't a demon... Sigh. Give her an aptitude test. Figure out her qualifications. Offer to pay her accordingly, if the figure isn't too unreasonable. There are worse things than having a dedicated legal rep.
>>713755Wait. You do have a point. FUCK! he might have been scrying on us ALL ALONG!
>>713779>Hug her Mary, we are not bad with our workers and she is our minion now!
>>713779Cant, debt is attached to the title, and its magically bound to us.Drachma bank can fuck itself tho.
Hey, we have an accountant now!
>>713738Wow... how mean Mary, you need to take responsibility! You really are evil. I don't think it's the demonic aura getting to you, you're actually just finally getting a chance to be yourself, a horrible person who likes to make people cry. I should have known since you worked for a debt agency.But you can redeem yourself! Give her a hug and tell her it'll be okay, we'll make a good person out of you yet! We need to get Curi in here to apply motherly hugs stat!
>>713789But she works for us now. And the only way she can be free is if she helps work off our debt.
>>713777Thats not gold digging. It was her job
Since we got an auditor as a minion, how about we start selling the adventurers some quick high interest loans in the event they need money immediately for resurrections or other things?
>>713784This>Mary you are becoming a demon, sorry. Yeah that's gow it works, too much time in the dungeon and that, plus the stupid tittle.
>>713799Yeah, but its still attached to us with the title. Her job can be to help us sort this shit out.
>>713738>I just wanted to get the moneeeeeyyyy!If it's just money that she's after, Drachma Bank is ripe for a pair of wrongful termination suits, and we need someone fairly competent to represent us in court since we can't appear there in person.
>>713802Ah yes, rule of the mask. You wear the mask too long you become what you are pretenting to be. Also demon realm contamination on humans... damn.
>>713806That works too.
>>713811Well, if we become a demon thats another suit against drachma once the debt is taken care of.
>>713809Minions can temporary leave the Dungeon. And we just got one with legal experience.
>>713738>The girl is still in sobbing hysterics.>Mary grabs her phone and tries dialing her old boss. The phone simply says that the number can no longer be reached.Expected that....Man, that is some impressive lung capacity.>Mary waits until the girl calms down a bit."Alright, tell me everything you know. What's going on at Drachma Bank.">The girl sniffles and wipes her sleeve."W-well.... Our B-boss was g-gonna send over a curse breaker but -sniffle- he saw the dungeon was starting to turn a profit... Th-that mean you were r-running the dungeon... And we saw the reviews you were getting s-so... We figured we could try again t-to get the m-m-money from you... I just wanted to talk about the payment plans...""Wait, hold on. You guys were gonna come rescue me?""I think... I don't know... He mentioned something about it but it got put on h-hold... He d-didn't tell me much, I just heard most of this from the office..."That son of a...He just wanted the money.He didn't care where it came from."And these payment plans? You kept trying to get me to talk about them.""If you... If you agreed to discuss payment plans with me that would imply that you were fully willing to take on the debt...""Hold on... So I'm not actually in debt?""Not until we have all the pieces together... We already knew you were working on getting this dungeon up and running be we just needed you to accept the debt as your own... Do I get my own room..?"I can't believe they were going to do this to me...
so, does anyone else feel like trying to orchestrate the down fall of the Darachma bank? if that insane minion thing worked we can probably exploit there stupidity somehow.
>>713829K so bring them to court with this witness
>>713829CAN'T SNICKER-SNACK THE MARY-MACK
>>713829Just say you forcefully employ your old boss, if she's wearing a wire that he's listening in on it's gotta work!
>>713829Motherfuckers. That's it, Darachma bank is going down!
>>713829How precisely did captain incompetance manage to get that much turnover?
>>713829Nay. For your first night at Slimecrown Citadel you must sleep in the slime pit! It will be very comfy, should you survive the experience. DUN DUN DUNNNNNN
>>713829The monster in the basement's got nothing on bankers.
>>713829"Yes. Also minions can leave the dungeon but if you don't return after a few days... or weeks depending on how strong you are... well... you die."
>>713829>>713842It was a conspiracy by that motherfucker!Hes getting fed to jeffery.
>>713829Let the new minion, make sure to tell her to say hello to all minions and co-workers. Also pull out her status window, let's see how strong she is.
>>713829Shit, it's like they're a real bank.
>>713829The key here. Is we don't have debt. So that's awesome.So now we need to ask Alex about her skills and get her a job. And explain the perks she has now.
>>713829She wants her own room? Okay. How do you challenge an auditor? Maybe they have to race to go over someone's last year of receipts?
>>713829the bank must pay.PAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!
>>713829She's on probation, so no.She's got to share with Explodey or Dungeoneer, her choice.
Rolled 1 (1d1)>>713829TIME TO SUEPUT DRACHMA BANK OUT OF BUSINESSSTART YOUR OWN BANK, MARY
>>713847but we spent almost ALL of our mana summoning lawyers to argue with Alex. We're gonna need to build up mana again before we can bring the case to court.>>713842We're all in agreement.
It is a BANK, Mary. Especially an Auditor branch of said bank. It is well known throughout every dimension that banks are mostly out to only get your money.They give no shits about what casualties they run over on the way.
>>713850Didn't several of us note that it only worked on Alex because she was physically present?>>713829Yes. You get your own room, and you can leave as you like, just be careful to return before a few days or you die.In the meantime, we have a goal. THE DOWNFALL OF DRACHMA BANK.
>>713842>>713850>>713853He aint stupidThis girl was sent on a suicide mission to get us to accept the debt He was smart enough to ensure we cant contact him given he just got the phone number cancelled right now
>>713829"The funny thing? If he HAD sent a curse breaker he could have seized the dungeon for non-payment of debt and just assigned me to run it.He could have had all future profits, buuut now he's complicit in or guilty of felony kidnapping, slavery, wrongful termination, etc...He's really bad at his job."
>>713857Ah yeah that."Say, take two days off to get your stuff in order, then come back okay? Minions can leave the Dungeon, just not for long."
>>713829She seems pretty pent up. Send her to the spa while we check her stats. Then join her and bond for a while.
>>713829Tell her that unlike Drachma bank, our dungeon provides it's employees free meals, healthcare and access to our spa when on downtime.
>>713829Well Mary, one positive. If they keep sending auditors and we keep making them minions, eventually you'll own your own bank.
>>713829>Do I get my own room..?Sure, but you do have to work for it. You can be our legal department, but we'll pay you more if you're willing to play a bit part in the dungeon every once in a while.
>>713857We should at least let tell her family and friends that she is in a life time of servitude now, until we get rid of the debt. Also let her bring some of her belongings.
>>713829to the comfy pit with her. it will comfort her and be a punishment at the same time.
>>713862>>713829Status window idea is worth doing.
>>713857Isn't that only the minions that we summon/hire with gold? Wouldn't she technically be an employee that we have to pay and not play by those rules?>>713881I figured if there's even the smallest chance of it working it could.We should probably do >>713885 though, if he's got a wire he's gonna be kicking himself.
>>713829Alex, I'm sorry, but you're an employee of this Dungeon now. Everyone including Mary will need to sleep in the Barracks. But as a new employee, why don't you spend some time in our in-house spa? I'm sure the treatment will help soothe what stress you have over this predicament.
>>713829You are aware that that amounts to a conspiracy of misrepresentation, active accomplice to practices in slave trade and slave trafficking, extortion, purposefully prolonging a stint of kidnapping and deprivation of civil liberties, as well as an attempt to defraud the financial system with misrepresentation of client identity, right? Well, right. You and Boss are criminals, second or third degree felons at that. We can discuss that later though, for right now, how about we talk about this hiring situation...?
>>713885But he is really good at golfing while working.
>>713829So they were basically bluffing. They don't have a legal case against you yet. That means we can still do something about this.I think I have a plan. This transfer of ownership isn't actually legal, is it? Which would mean that our employing her is also illegal. So she could suggest to someone that they could get the money if she sued us for unlawful imprisonment. Then we settle out of court with her, she can stay here willingly (since she doesn't actually work for them anymore), and we can use the legal precedent to establish the debt as illegitimate.Would that work?
>>713910He must have an EX rank in golfing due to how much he loafs around rather than actually working.
>>713899Eh... you know we cursed her, right? So yes... better be safe and don't let her stay away for long, death curses are a thing.Plus hopefully having one or two days off a week away of the Dungeon will be enough fo avoid her becoming a demon.
So who's willing to bet Drachma Bank is a dungeon itself and our Boss is the DM of Drachma Bank?
>>713922do we want to avoid turning her into a demon though? More company around here is always nice.
>>713922Did we curse her or just hire her without consent or contract?
>>713932What if he too is in debt with a higher power and is also trying turn a profit.
>>713945We have no idea to be honestMagic bullshit goes where it wants to goWe just here along for the ride
>>713932Could Gold just be their version of Tokens? A Dungeon so big that it could sustain a fiat currency by it's very presence...
>>713912Legally? If Mary were actually capable of walking away from the dungeon, she could walk away from it.More importantly, the liens on the dungeon fell off in the transfer. She can claim ownership of the dungeon while not accepting the debt.Also, Alex doesn't have to accept our employment. She agreed to nothing, and can walk way. As she never accepted employment, that would make her own firing a wrongful termination - unless she accepted a job with us.We can tell her that, and then extend a job offer to her anyway. We could use somebody on the outside to do marketing and PR.
>>713945Is there a difference that matters at th8s point?
>>713938We could use her to sue, and that would look better if she is human. Actually we want to use her to sue that damn company. So yes, let her stay human.
>>713952I dunno, I'm pretty sure that forcible recruitment is just a Dungeon thing.
>>713912Actually, we're not imprisoning her. We merely told her that she's now a minion in our dungeon. If she wishes to refuse this position and walk out of our dungeon, we could not do anything to stop her. The real crime that happened here was that Drachma bank fired her without due process. Even had she accepted the job in our dungeon, that in itself is none of Drachma bank's business and therefore this makes it an illegal firing.
we need her to work on a paperwork armor so thick that the previous king of the demons can't magic it back from us. a stack of paperwork so thick that not even 10000 mana could do all of it.
>>713957well we can always modify one of the cat-kinis and get some fake demon horns if we want her to play demon minion in the dungeon while she's here.
>>713829HOLY SHIT is that graph the profits of this dungeon? Why was it so high at first? Did the King of Demons lure a bunch of filthy filthy rich top tier heroes in and kill them with Jeffrey?Go look at the review history from before we came here.
>>713961Eh, she can't refuse. At most we could fire her, but why we would so that?
>>713975I'm guessing the huge drop was post Jef. Before that, it was a succubutt dungeon. Go figure why that would be popular.
>>713829wait. ALEX. HOW THE FUCK DID THIS DUNGEON TURN A PROFIT WHILE BONE HEAD WAS AT THE HELM?
So since we have two lawyers can we set up a murder mystery room where the adventurer is placed on trial and has to prove they're innocent in a system clearly designed to convict as many people as possible? We don't need to watch the full trials, just have them go in and wait to see if they come out. If they're guilty they're executed.
>>713973I'm pretty sure that as a non-denizen of the dungeon like Mary is, if she dies in the dungeon, she dies for real.
>>713961We are not sure about that. So you wanna risk killing her? >>713996SuccubusThen the idiot bankrupted the dungeon creating the ultimate boss monster.
>>713999but that's contrary to the theme of slime citadel... wait. SC (Slime Citadel) is a kingdom of slimes right? So that means a kingdom needs a court... I think you're onto something anon.
>>713996>SuccubusAt least the past crown anons did something right
>>713999we'd use this music for it yeah?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZl1KZW4z_U
>>714022Speaking of, when do we start making our own Succubi?
>>714016>>714022>SuccubusWe need to make succubi slime. It's part of our heritage.
>Mary pulls up Alex's stat sheet.>It's... Depressing.1/2
>>713961>Even had she accepted the job in our dungeon, that in itself is none of Drachma bank's business and therefore this makes it an illegal firing.One of the most fundamental principles an auditing firm has to have is complete independence from its clients. If even a SINGLE employee of yours works for / is related to / owns stock in / has other involvements with your client, you're not performing a proper audit, and that can get you and your client sued. Alex getting fired, while horrible and totally Mary's fault, is a completely reasonable action and failure to take it might even result in legal action against Drachma.
>>714016No, he actually reduced the whole dungeon to a single boss room (to fight him) made of gold and other expensive shit, and spent all the money on succubi ass.
>>714054So Alex was literally a new Hire? That is fucking SAD.
>>713999>Pheonix Wright roomWho would play the judge?
>>714057Pardon, not just sued, it can result in criminal charges. Auditing is serious business.
>>714054Bring up our own stats! For that matter, can we check our staff's stats?
>>714036This is a Larro quest. Do you really want to deal with a pack of bleedingly incompetent, endlessly clumsy semen suckers who will never actually commit the deed save by providence?
>>714054Where's she storing that pen? L-lewd.
>>714054Holy crap She really is a fucking new guy The boss was smart to send this one on the suicide op
>>714068The new girl seems pretty easily cowed and fairly ignorant of the world. She'd do fine. Or Ruth in a pinch since she already has a gavel.
>>714054Ooof thats not great. We don't have many jobs for her that would work yet...aside from maybe the shops/cafe or marketing. Maybe finances.
>>714054Do those runes pointing to her boobs mean flat?
>>714068Ms Bloops has the finest legal mind in our dungeon by virtue of being our oldest minion.
>>714054>Wisdom>1No wonder she was sent here so easily
>>714075Only if they're slime succubi....I'm morbidly curious what they'd be made of.
>>714054>look at her stat sheet>give her a pity hug, don't say why.
>>714054Poor, weak, flat, slow.Oh she's got terrible stats!
>>714109They'd be made of succubi, duh.
>>714057Yeah that rightThe Boss was right in firing the newbie for this
>>714086>>714096It's a good thing she can't hear us roasting her.
>>714054Eh how she could summon Lawyer with such low stats?Dammit we did a class change on her!Good news, she can't die permanently.Bad news! She is now useless to sue the bank!
>>714054We need to get some shop seedlings, like we planned on, and then I guess make her the stock girl for the shop.
>>714054Well, good, she is such a low level she can become anything. Lets pick her a class that makes the most out of her int and hp stats...
>>714054what's her new job? Does she still keep her previous job as auditor? what's her current Level?
>>714126Getting hired does NOT change class. Remember, Mary kept her old class even after becoming the DM.
>>714136Well, her Strength, Agility, and Wisdom are all 1, so clearly 2 HP is a lot for her.
>>714129Let's give her a few runes first. And lets try to raise her wisdom... by making the other girls train her.>>714137Eh no.That was gaining a tittle and a job. In this case we literally turned her into a minion.Summon Lawyer is a high level spell, she could not have it at level 2
>>714129Duskblade? We're probably running 3.5, so it might work.
>POOR>FLAT>WEAK>SLOWYou need runes, stat. Mind and Comfy are best for a flat auditor, I think.
>>714185Let's fill her with water runes, we have tons of those.
>>714185Sounds good to me. Lets start having them draw up plans for her semi-lewd outfit as well.
>>714054Yikes. That's bad."Well, kinda. I mean, it's your own room that everyone else shares. It's called the barracks.""Oh...""But look at the bright side! Working for me comes with a lot of benefits. We have a spa here that I insist you check out. You'll love it. Nice and relaxing."".....""Also, not entirely sure about this, but if you step outside you might die. Not immediately, it might take a few days. But, even so, I wouldn't risk it.""...........""So.... I'll just have Curi lead you to the spa... Maybe help you get to know some of the others...""...................."...I feel bad.>The Dungeoneer enters the room."Hey, boss! Oh, who's the cutie?""Ah, Dungeoneer, this is Alex. She's our new employee. Alex, this is Dungeoneer. She helps run the place.">Dungeoneer shakes her hand."Pleasure to meet you."".....""Quiet, that's fine. Hey, boss, listen, came to tell you that a Hero is outside the dungeon. They wanted a meeting with you before they enter. You can accept this if you want. You'll be fully protected while outside the dungeon. Just sometimes the heroes like to make some kinda grand gesture or speech before they enter. Just give me the word and I'll teleport you right out there. Or you can decline. Up to you."
>>714201Keep in mind putting runes in her would make her not human, something she might not want.
>>714204Sure, sounds like it might be fun.
>>714204Accept! We can catch out new minion up to speed while the hero is running through the dungeon.
>>714204so no matter what the hero can't sneak attack us? if so then i don't see any reason not to... indulge them~
>>714204Who's the hero? Anyone we know?
>>714204Poor Alex. And poor Mary.Why not see this speech. It can allow Mary to get into character.Kinda sad its just one hero.
>>714204ITS A TRAPTHE HERO WAS SENT BY THE BANK TO MAKE YOU ACCEPT TERMS
>>714204Screw it, let's hear what this LARP-addict has to say.
>>714204Sure, bring Alex along so she learn the ropes.
>>714204Accept, and remember to wear your new outfit.
>>714204INTIMIDATE THEM!Put on your boss armor on!
>>714204Sure lets do it
>>714204It's fine. Go talk to the person.
>>714204>Agree to meet the Hero:>"Yes before you enter the dungeon would you mind giving us a survey on our dungeon exterior/entrance? We're currently renovating the dungeon from ground up and would like some feedback.
>>714204Sure, lets talk to them.
>>714204Sure, why not?
>>714204"Tell the hero we are closed today due to personal party, he can come back tomorrow. I have to find a way to upgrade my new minion... eh employer since her status are so low I can't believe she could summon a lawyer before I cursed... eh before I hired her... I am becoming a demon right?"
>>714204Sure, go meet up with them.And in the meantime, have Dungeoneer make her a new outfit, and assign the girl a class.
>>714204Right, let's do this. Time to put your new swag outfit to work.And Mary? It sucks, but don't worry. She'll come to realize the same thing you did- being part of a dungeon can be a very rich, fulfilling and honestly just plain cool business.
>>714204Whats the worst that could happen?
>>714204Go meet the Hero. It'll be fine probably.If they want to talk to you like a person it might be wise to ask them for help with your legal case.
Accept. Have Alex watch, so she can get an idea of what we do.
>>714204>I feel bad.She was actively trying to trick you into accepting a debt that wasn't yours. This is just comeuppance. If anyone should feel bad, it's the bank, and they clearly don't, so neither should you.
>>714204>"Oh..."We do have a fair bit of spare cash, and rooms only cost 25G (100G if we have to make them barracks for some reason). We could see about building her a room after everyone else who wants one gets one.>Meet with the hero>>714223This guy has a healthy amount of paranoia. Can we get any info on them before we accept?
>>714256"Eh whatever, let's me change and I will meet the hero in my Demon King costume. Were did I put it?"
>>714204>You'll be fully protected while OUTSIDE the dungeonHas Dungeoneer been informed about the curse?
>>714223Yeah probably best to check.
>>714321Best to check the terms on the spell. Didn't Alex say that the bank had information on it? Or did she just overhear a passing conversation?
Rolled 10 (1d20)>>714204DO NOT ACCEPT.IT IS A TRAPAlso I thought mary couldn't leave because of the curse anyway?
>>714204DONT DO IT MARYITS A TRAP BY THE BANKTHEY'RE ASKING FOR THE KING OF DEMONS, IF YOU ANSWER YOU ACCEPT THE DEBT
>>714347That was before the stats drain. Right now is like she was a five year old.
>>714368They did not ask to see the king of demons. They asked to see the person presently running the dungeon.
>>714368Actually it does not say that.
Hey >>714368,>>714395 is right.>"They wanted a meeting with you before they enter."Doesn't say who they're asking for, just 'you'.
>>714204Make sure they're not specifying that they're meeting the King of Demons but otherwise we can't just hide from debt collectors.
"They're not someone sent by the bank, are they?""As far as I can tell they're not. A fairly strong hero. I think they'll be a good challenge for our dungeon, even solo.""Hmm... Also, I thought I couldn't leave the dungeon?""You can't, really. This is just for an instant. You'll be back once the 'scene' is over. So, enjoy the fresh non-dungeon air while you can.""Ah, alright. Well, Alex, come with me. You can get a taste of how this job goes.">The Dungeoneer teleports them both out of the dungeon.>The outside of Slimecrown Citadel is an almost barren wasteland with the dungeon being the only noticeable landmark."Hero!" Mary shouts, "It is I, Mary, Ruler of the uh... Dungeon of Pain? We need to get that sign fixed ASAP... ... Oh, right! I am the uh leader of Slimecrown Citadel! Who dares challenge me and my dungeon!?"1/2
>>714407Weve already been referred to as the king of demons, iirc, by adventurers, have we not?
>>714407>>714403>>714398>>714395Dungeoneer didn't quote them, and we know the bank is out to get usparanoia is important right now, you want to pay off a 158,000G debt? Never trust the banks
>>714424We really need to fix that exterior.
>>714424Holy crap, we never fixed that sign? Woooooooooooow. I feel embarrassed. Let's change that like, next thing. Get the outside looking spiffy.
>>714424Size difference? Why am I starting to get dark souls vibes right about now?
>>714424Hmm... Are they an elf?
Quickly Alex, grab that sign while we're out here! You can leave the signpost, just take the sign.
>>714437Just referring to us as the king of demons isnt enough. They already have proof we have the title, plus eeve been referred to by it before. They just cant tie the debt to us until we imply we accept it, such as by agreeing to relevant negotiations..
>>714424I dont like the look on mary face Something wrong with this so called "HERO"
>>714456Shes had that look for the last 8 panels
>>714424Mary! Get carpenter to survey the Dungeon entrance! Alex, take that sign and get rid of it! or at the very least re-name it to Slimecrown Citadel!
>>714456...What look? It's deadpan. Kinda her default.
Oh snap! Mary, are you getting taller? That's awesome.
>>714443Pretty sure we need a few more upgrades before we can mess around with the outside. It is a priority though; first impressions are important and that does not match our dungeon at all.
>>714452if we respond to it, it implies that we have accepted the titleif someone ask for an audience with the King of Demons, and we reply to it, congrats, we get the title
>>714476We already have it, its magically tied to us.You are mixing up the title with the debt.
>>714483we'll see, I don't trust this hero. The timing's too good for it to not be a trap
>>714493Heros constantly show up. We're a dungeon after all. Let's just see who we have.
>>714424"From the galactic forest, deep in the Fae Sector of Galaxy 644b-34x, I, Moon Elf, have come to challenge your dungeon! For years my people have suffered from a decline in resources. And so, the Space Scouts were created to challenge all dungeons for their resources.I have requested to speak with you as a courtesy, but note that no matter what, I will not leave this place empty handed! Prepare yourself, Mary, for all your resources will belong to us!"
>>714509You better have constructed some additional pylons...
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>714509ELF PRIDE WORLD WIDESHOUT IT OUT, MARY
>>714509Neat. Add some extra treasures to the harder boss monsters for her.
>>714509All we have are slimes. I hope you enjoy the dungeon.
>>714509Mary Quick! Scan the Hero and get her STATS ASAP!Alex, be a dear and renovate the dungeon sign entrance will you?
>>714509Ok, Melf. we can schedule in for a one-man raid in about 15 minutes. Also, where is the bottom of your wrist?
>>714509...You.Are.Godsdamned.ADORABLE....ahem."By all means, you are free to try! Steel yourself, Space Scout- for the dangers that lie within are just as fierce as any beyond the stars."
>>714509>99c Brand Retro-Future Ray GunBest taste. Mary! Claim her as a Minion, I want to keep her and cuddle on her space pillows.
>>714509if we steal some of her hair, can we get the elf rune?
>>714509knife eared freak
>>714509Shake her hand, and give her a token for the shop
>>714509"so you're fine with like, 20 pounds of slime right?"
>>714509Dont trust herShe has the nerd glasses like you and alexShe been sent by the bank The now want to takeover the dungeon itself
>>714534That or moon runes
>>714509So.... is what you're saying real or are you a chuuni?
>>714538But nobody here speaks japanese.
>>714509Her helmet will proove hilarious for Ruth's new room. I am excited.
>>714542Do you even have to ask?
>>714509Call her colonialist scum.
>>714509SCAN THE MOON ELF. USE YOUR MAGIC GLASSES AND SCAN HER! WE NEED TO TAILOR THE DUNGEON RIDE FOR THE ELF'S MAXIMUM ENJOYMENT!
Actually, a thought. Dungeoneer DID say she was powerful. I don't think she'd lie about that. I'm thinking we go no holds barred. Let's not treat her like a child, okay?
>>714542She's just a chuuni.
>>714538>>714541How would we know if they're moon runes if we can't understand what it says?
>>714509Is moon elf a boy or a girl?Does it matter?
>>714554If we can get Daki Slime out from them after this, of course.
>>714554We mix them with darkness runes and see if an edgy JRPG slime comes out.
>>714554If we know all the other runes, then by process of elimination, they must be moon runes. How hard could it possibly be to learn every rune, right?
Far out! I hope you like precious bodily fluids, as it's about the only thing we have around here.This girl is on a mission, not a pleasure cruise (assuming we can take her at face value). The thing in this dungeon with the most resources tied up in it is the Thing in The Basement, so I say we should just sort of try to avoid mentioning it. If the dungeon appears to be lacking in supplies to plunder, perhaps the moonmen will leave us alone. Surely there are lots of comets in space to mine for Water runes...
>>714561Yes.Girl elves can take on more tentacles.
>>714509> Rumors tell that within the heart of this water, one can find an ever renewing font of water (Decanter of Endless Slime)> Is she brave enough to fight her way into the darkest depths, defeat the mother of slimes, and perhaps even go beyond?
>>714561the chest cutout in her suit suggests girl... but with how flat they are... maybe they just prefer womens clothing.
>>714562what if we get daki's of every single adventurer that has entered the dungeon?
>herThats a dude. Isnt it?
>>714576Believe me, the pressure suit is just hiding her curves.
>>714590She's just fat
>>714590Or is it emphasizing them?All will be revealed when they reach the spa.
>>714509The moon elf wants to roleplay, so we should play the part.
>>714509>>714549Call her FAT colonialist scum, FAT on the bread and honey of honest dungeon-running Demon Kings (who aren't fat like her).
>>714599Anon. We are not a Demon King.
>>714606But we are tho.
>>714606Yet, we are becoming a demon cause we live inside a dungeon.
>>714599Don't we basically live off the shit we take from adventurer's corpses when the basement monster kills them, though.That and the extortionist healing fees from cleric plant?
>>714561>>714576It's a girl. She looks better with her helmet on. Also, 99c Brand Retro-Future Ray Gun.
>>714509Foolish Moon Elf! My dungeon will not be easy quarry for you!
>>714627Just look how fat she is.
>>714619What ls your point? Corpse looting is honest work.
>>714619And sometimes we give phat loot that's worth far more than what they pay in (while still profiting).
>>714509"We shall see about that! Few survive the Slimecrown citadel. None have fully completed it."
>>714635The economy seems to run on creating free copies of precious items using magic. And non-permanent death. I don't claim to understand how this works, but the legal system is looking par for course.
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>714509MaryTurn on MAXIMUM HAM...but don't refer to yourself a king of demon even when you do.
>>714631She's not fat, it's suit insulation. Also giant titties.
>>714509Are fire arms a forbidden weapon to use in dungeons? For that matter what can we bar in our dungeon?
>>714656Well, firearms are a poor weapon to use against slimes to begin with seeing that you quickly run out of ammo with very little result.
>>714656Never been stated. So we'll have to deal with the consequences. Don't want to restrict our heroes too much.
>>714663But is a ray gun!
>>714663What if it's a Retro-Future Firearm, powered by tiny transistors and vacuum tubes that give it UNLIMITED LASER ZAPS!
>>714656I personally think that if the heroes want to bring a ballista into the dungeon, they should be allowed to do so.
>>714663>>714656also, slimes can gunk up the gears and cogs and electronics within those guns rendering them useless. >>714636THIS. we MUST HINT of the fact that the BASEMENT MONSTER EXISTS.
>>714650>wearing nothing under a hoodie
"We shall see about that! Few survive the Slimecrown Citadel. None have fully completed it.""Then I, Moon Elf, shall be the first.""Foolish Moon Elf... You'll soon see that my dungeon will not be an easy quarry for you!"Wow I feel like I'm a villain on those old cartoon shows."I would hope not. If it were easy then that would mean there is nothing worth taking. But, I have not failed before and I will not fail now! Be ready for me, Dungeon Lord! Your creatures shall feel the sting of my ray gun!">Mary and Alex are teleported out. A stock evil laugh is played as Mary can not bring herself to muster up a real one.I tried."Good job, Boss," The dungeoneer says, "So, we have the dungeon just about ready. Any changes you wanna make before Moon Elf enters?"
>>714684There is but one. Fetch me... A theremin!
>>714684Nah, but you should probably get Alex here suited up in her new outfit.
>>714684Here's an idea. Put small groups of slimes in the first few rooms, so she can get a sense of how many slimes there are per encounter and how much she needs to conserve ammo, then put a huge number of weak slimes in one room. Is that doable?
>>714684Add glass space helmets to all the slimes, and put spooky space music in all the rooms.Also make the slimes move around like they're in low gravity.
>>714684Awww, you did fine.Now lesse...I honestly think we need to make sure the Knight/Lily fight isn't as easy to snipe Lily. She's kinda a weakpoint.The Ice Elemental as well. Someone suggested making it two of them? I like that idea.Again, Dungeoneer said she was strong and could plausibly solo this dungeon, and we'd been meaning to make a couple changes anyway. Let's handle that right now and use her as a test case.
>>714684wait to see how she reacts to ms bloops in the fountain, if she's an ass go full hard mode.
>>714684unleash the ALEX
>>714684No changes. Don't give her a home turf advantage.
>>714684Oh! Oh! Also, get Alex to pose for her Daki. We need to get that done ASAP.
>>714706What if she considers our slimes to be resources worth plundering?
>>714684Que high adrenaline background music for the battle sections.
>>714684Give all the slimes saying "Slime lives matter!" and "Down with colonial exploitation!"
>>714684We should probably put appropriate gold in certain spots 25 for fights, 50 for mini boss, 150 for boss. And maybe place some archers at the stepping stones part of the rocks to hinder for a mild challenge. We can judge after the fact what we need.
>>714704Have we already designed her new outfit?
we need to fix that sign first and formost. Showmanship is important people
>>714684The dungeon was just altered after the last group. Just leave it as-is and see how it does.
>>714710>I honestly think we need to make sure the Knight/Lily fight isn't as easy to snipe Lily. She's kinda a weakpoint.Summon Magic Slimes to cast Reflect and Shell.
>>714725Yes its called a birthday suit with a little slime
>>714710>>714684Could we power up the ice elementals, making them 3 water, or 2 water, one wind creatures?
>>714684Double the monsters
>>714684What we have against ray guns?
>>714728Can't do that till dunegoneer 2 sadly.>>714725And that is when we have runes to spend. Can't do that in dunegon raids.
>>714732that was raid mode for multiple adventurers, I don't think we can keep it in raid mode for solo moon elf.
So treat the raygun as a heat weapon? or lightning weapon?
>>714739depends how the raygun worksif its directional energy/a laser, our best bet is oil slimes or magma slimes, as they wont evaporate
>>714742I thought raid mode was an automatic thing for when 5 or more people challenge at once.
>>714684Up the number of slimes and slime types spawned in each room since she's a ranged hero. Place an ammo and range limit on her ray gun. She can use it if she likes, but she'll have to deal with the reload times and the slimes targeting her raygun.Up the difficulty, add some archer slimes to make the choice of using her jetpack a conscious and dangerous choice.>>714739we can up the number of slime mobs within the dungeon and force her into melee, also add some slimes hanging from the ceiling in case she goes to use her jetpack.
>>714742No, we did a whole overhaul after the fact, just looking at the current map should show that. Like we have an extra mini boss among other things (which I don't remember exactly what, but they're probably good enough).I say just see how the current layout works and use her as feedback to see if anything doesn't work quite right.
>>714684make sure to set a difficulty trigger on Ms. Bloops. If M.Elf does kill Ms. Bloops... she will regret it.
>>714757Eh but ray guns don't reload at most they have a cold down time.
>>714684I think we need to tighten up the mechanics on the Lily/RSK fight, we've been abusing the fusion ever since we came up with it and I really think there should be a way to get through the fight without triggering it. Maybe only let Lily revive RSK once for every two party members (rounded up), only trigger the fusion if Lily dies and RSK is still alive, and have them start the fight already fused when in raid mode.
>>714768It's been forever and i forgot what half the things on the dungeon map are it seems...
>>714773Perhaps they function like those rayguns from TF2 or the Doop Rifle from Futurama, where you have a handcrank or pump that charges the weapon?
>>714773wait. if rayguns can overheat, then shit don't make the slimes target the raygun, since their slime temperature would only serve as a heatsink!.>>714777Or if RSK dies, Lily can simply give the adventurer the key while grieving in anguish of her fallen champion/lover.
>>714772That works.Also let's fill our new minion with runes.
>>714733I like this idea. Also,>>714723As well. Put some more gold into this place.
>>714784>wait. if rayguns can overheat, then shit don't make the slimes target the raygun, since their slime temperature would only serve as a heatsink!.I disagree, Explody is just fine targeting it.
Ok, so we got an auditor minion, what are her class skills again? What runes synergy works well with them?Space elf says she is poor, what can we do with that?
>>714684No changes for now-wait did we add more loot drops like the adventurers asked for? This one is SPECIFICALLY ASKING for "resources" so we can't just let her leave empty handed!
Oh yeah, the Ms. Bloops thing is nice, too. Remind me, what's the different modes? I know there's Normal, Raid, Hard, and END OF THE LINE, but what's in each?
>>714800Eh she got level drained. We can basically give her any class we want.Also add more loot.
>>714684Give the Moon Elf the option for the normal, hard, and NIGHTMARE mode runs.
Alright so we'll keep it mostly the same for now...But definitely have the new Archer Slimes on standby.We'll have to see exactly how the raygun works since we can't directly affect her stuff.Let's see how she does with Ms. Bloops. We can also do some minor changes.--------------------------------------->Moon Elf enters the Slimecrown Citadel. The first room is a beautiful room with a magnificent fountain in the center of it.>Despite it's beauty, or perhaps because of it, the Moon Elf remains on guard. Her gun is raised and she takes cautious steps through the room."Bloop!">The Elf jumps with a start as Ms. Bloops pops out of the fountain. She waves at Moon Elf but the elf aims her ray gun at the slime."You must be one of them, huh? Are you friend or foe?""-burbling slime noises-">There's a mechanical sounding voice that says 'universal translator activated'"I see... But why in this room?""-slooshing slime noises-""No, my mission is about harvesting resources.""-blooping slime noises-""Exactly. So, you understand why I must do this."1/2
This situation reminds me of Recettear, what with the evil auditors and lawyers thingNo matter, hmm, is there a difficulty level that gives good loot but also puts up a challenge? Space Elf seems serious but if she can make it, she's definitely not going away empty handed
>>714835MS BLOOPS NOOOOOOOOOO
>>714777I have a protocol sheet somewhere for that fight. I will post it when the time comes. But you are on the right track.>>714835Ms.Bloops! Noooooooooo!
>>714777How about this:For a solo adventure: >Lily/RSK fight will have the standard phase one RSK fight. From there the phases will split into separate stages depending on which one dies first. If Lily dies, this triggers the Lily Slime Knight (four-rune version) plus the slime adds, defeating Lily Slime Knight will drop them the key. If RSK fight dies first and Lily was attacked, then Lily then enters the fray for a duo miniboss fight stage. >>714835OH NOES MS. BLOOPS.Quick! tell her about the impending difficulty spike that occurs on Ms. Bloops's death!
>>714835Don't do it.
>>714777>>714784>Or if RSK dies, Lily can simply give the adventurer the key while grieving in anguish of her fallen champion/lover.That's a good idea. And since Lily was originally supposed to just sit back and watch the battle, we can go back to that for solo and duo heroes and only have her step in for groups of three or four.>>714835>About to kill Ms. BloopsOr we can save these changes for the next adventurer to come through and give her Hard Mode.
>>714835-Pew->She fires a ray bolt at Ms. Bloops, obliterating her in one hit."It's nothing personal, kid...">A rune appears above Ms. Bloops body and is absorbed by the gem on Moon Elf's chest.------"... Should I be worried about that?""Nah. Sometimes Heroes can gather special resources from stuff. Like if a Miner entered the dungeon they might be able to harvest rocks or something. It doesn't affect us.""Oh, okay."------"The Water Rune... It will come in handy for restoring the forest. But, I'll need more.">She goes to the next room.Welp, she killed Ms. Bloops...
>>714835Fun fact, ice can serve as a refractive index. We can have the ice elementals throw her own goddamn rays back at her.>>714862Okay. That tears it. She dies.
>>714851And nightmare mode activates.
>>714862>"It's nothing personal, kid..."she dies, she dies horribly.
>>714835>>714862You want to do it the hard way?To bad You get legendary mode now
HARD MODE IT IS....what were the hard mode changes, again?
>>714862PULL THE LEVER OF DIFFICULTY SPIKES!I wonder what kind of runes is M.Elf is harvesting?
>>714862Archers at the ready, I guess...
>>714835Noo don' harm ms. Bloops, why would you ever harm ms. Bloops.
>>714862>killed Ms. BloopsPut on your warfaces boys
>>714862THE SPACE BITCH DIES
>>714862Well, you're fucked, then.
>>714862[RAID MODE ACTIVATION CONFIRMED!][Prepare to die mode engaged.]
>>714862God of HyperDeath Mode Activate.
>>714862We must make her suffer horribly for this
>>714871Did we ever officially make a hard mode? I'd like to say no.Also stuff like this is why I feel we should place a magic trap in that room. Kill Bloops, get teleported to some hell fight-gauntlet where your reward for victory is being dumped back at the start of the dungeon.
huh, you know if we make a feature that killing the first slime results in a difficulty spike would be an interesting mechanic. also, "nothing personal kid" really? is there a way we can give her shift for that?
Rolled 11 (1d20)>>714862She killed ms bloops....PULL THE LEVER KRONK
>>714862"YOU.....YOU HAVE SLAIN MS. BLOOPS. THAT IS UNFORGIVABLE HERO. TO SLAY AN INNOCENT SLIME LIKE THAT IS A CRIME IN THE LAND OF SLIMECROWN. FOR THY TRANSGRESSIONS, THIS DUNGEON'S DIFFICULTY SHALL BE RAISED... AND THY PUNISHMENT SHALL BE DEATH.
>>714896We ran through Raid Mode last time. That's a bare minimum starting place.
>>714862Best way to defeat her, make hurtful fat jokes.
>>714862NIGHTMARE MODE it is then. No heals for her! Tell the cleric plant to go on offense.
Rolled 61 (1d100)rolling for rage.
>>714901>"Difficulty has spiked 50%">"Just so you know, this is completely personal"
>>714901I agree, but a difficulty spike is expected. Just don't expect raid mode. Seeing as we're not able to do that.Also, Ms.Bloops is beloved.
>>714862>she killed Ms. BloopsTime to up the dungeon's difficulty.
>>714862Just do normal hard mode, see how she does.
>>714908No man. We need that extra gold.
>>714908But her money. Also she might try and fight everything for the runes, including Oilivia.
>>714862Suddenly it make sense why she'd come to a Slime DungeonIt's time to man the warstations! Make it challenging!
>>714908I back this fluff
>>714916Yeah. Add more loot to compensate.
>>714862I'm gonna get a lot of flak for this, but while we should up the difficulty, we shouldn't make it impossible for her to win. We do need to maintain some semblance of fairness after all.
>>714919shes probably poor and she's here for resource collection, she'd likely shoot cleric plant on sight
You know, if you guys want good reviews from her, just set up like a hordemode to activate. Basically, dump a bunch of easily reproducible slimes on her.Her primary motivation in these dungeons is to get materials. If she figures out there's an abundant supply of runes in here, she'll become a regular and give great reviews.
>>714931No one said 'make it impossible'. We're just going from Legend of Zelda to Dark Souls in terms of difficulty.
Wait guys no. The token was the reward for not killing Bloops. The penalty for killing her is not getting the token. We didn't put her in as a trap, just a hidden reward for nice heroes.I guess adding in the archer slimes is a fitting extra "penalty" though, for a hero this strong.
>>714935so she's this in a nutshell:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dkkf5NEIo0
>>714935>>714862This anon DOES have a point, but I still want her to die eventually. She can keep what runes she can grab, so long as she gets her comeuppance.
Speaker comes on, "for slaughtering an innocent you have unlocked the secret hell mode the is no bonus only suffering." "we hope you do not have a nice day."
>>714935Good idea! If we up the difficulty by putting in more trash mobs she'll be happy about all the runes she's getting.
>>714935right... would she lose the runes she collects when she dies though?if not make the basement beast a required part of this dungeon run.
...It's amazing how easy it is to tell when everyone's riled up, and when we've cooled down a bit.
>>714937That is a fair compramise.
Did you guys forgot she personally called us out to talk shit to us? She goes down tonite
>>714931I agree. What happened was cruddy, definitely, but being the first monster of the dungeon has risks, and I'm sure Ms. Bloops understands that. While an increase in difficulty is fine, making things completely unfair will probably have consequences. We have the dungeon's reputation to consider.
>>714919>>714920She shot miss bloop! No heals for her! besides, we'll get her money after she's downed.
To summarise.Add archers, mild difficulty spike, no bonus tokens. Also, we need to make sure our NPCs are NPCs. Maid/Butler, Oilivia, etc.
>>714941No fuck her she should suffer... i know i'm being hostial but to be fair she just shot ms. Bloops
>>714936So lots of ambushes and archers hiding behind doors/entryways to get back shots in?
>>714895BULLSHIT you didn't convince me, show me your REAL war face!
>>714943Irrelevant whether she loses them on dying or not. All that matters is that she KNOWS this place can just afford to throw runes at you till you drop. She'll be tempted to later return with a bigger crew to attempt to clear the place again, which is what we want.
>>714941>>714937>>714935I like the idea of combining these.Add more ranger slimes to 'punish' her actions, but the punishment will be something to her benefit anyway.
>>714966She's far from the first to 'kill' her.. It's okay, Ms. Bloops is as resilient as she is adorable.
>>714966Bloops IS a dungeon enemy. She's semi immortal now like all the others.
Wait...what's going to happen with Curi? She still dancing or no?
>>714943Adventurers keep found drops during the dungeon. We get a copy of their equipment and some gold, but they keep the gold and items they otherwise found.
>>714935Double the slimes!
>>714975Yep, better to be fluid. Better business this way.>>714980Its only a fascimilie of her. The real one is the boss still.
>>714983Make Citadel one big motherfuckin slimeNOM
>>714997anon. That gives me an idea on how to design the Exterior of the dungeon as well as the dungeon layout. for the upper floors.
>>714976But it was shown that she had a conversation with ms. Bloops then made the choice to shoot her in the face that needs to be punished, with others they did not know and could be forgiven, but not this, for this she must suffer.
>>714862We hate space elves now
>>715004That would be what the Magic Slimes are for...
>>714862Guys... She's going to end up in the Slime Play Park where we keep all of our spare slimes... She's going to bully them and die horribly
make sure to completely cover her in explodies.
>>714983One hundred million slimes! If she wants out, she can fight her way out!
>>715012T-they're NPCs...right?May want to make them NPCs.
There was that one Dragon Quest spinoff where you played slimes piloting a tank, what are the odds of us getting some tank-slimes?
...We really need that 'choose your run style' thing some other people were suggesting earlier. I'd be less livid.
>>715022That was me. And after this. we HAVE to force the adventures to do that before coming into our place.
>>715021Rocket slime was the best. I think using a monster tank might be unfair, unless we give the adventurers a tank too, though.
Pausing here for now! Don't be too harsh on the Moon Elf. She's cute.Audit will resume tomorrow. Check the tweeter for the time
>>715031I think we've calmed down a bit. We should be fine.
>>714997SLIME RUSH!Mary you can't have 0.5 of a stat that does not compute.
>>715038Absolutely. We just want her to run a slime gauntlet and get all the runes she needs to rebuild her forest home.
>>715022We can do that in the first room. Bloops can be in charge of it, with cue cards. Though we'd want to figure out what styles we can fit. Combat style is easy, just yank out the noncombat rooms and put other monsters in instead. We don't really have enough extra puzzles to have a puzzle theme, though-- we'd need to design a bunch of new ones. A trap dungeon wouldn't be hard to manage, we can just scatter pits and arrow traps and pressure plates and such all over the place. Maybe combine oil slimes with fire arrows or whatever.
>>715031How is Mary a lot noodlier than AlexandriaOr well, I suppose Mary minmaxed more when it comes to auditing
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>715031>Don't be too harsh.So, we shouldn't kill her huh? Just make her wish for a death that will never be granted?Very well.
>>715031Haha, Mary isn't any stronger than Alex. Just a different stat distribution!
>>715031Oh god, that is dangerously low HP.
>>715031>runes: none (?)DUN DUN DUUUUUN
>>715050She still shouldn't have a stat only be 0.5. That's less than the legal minimum.Plus becoming a demon should be increasing her stats
>>715031Weeeee need to do something about this, seriously. Like, not a joke, we need to up those stats. It's worrying.
>>715031Loodly, Modest, Decent, Chaos. Ahahahahahaha.Thank you for running, Larro!
>>715031First thing tomorrow we start training to up our stats! We're living in a dungeon gosh darnit! We need to be stronger!
>>715082Please, we could build Mary a solid gold, form fitting power suit instead.
>>715031>chaos>modest>decent>does that say noodles?
>>714862Don't go into any rage frenzies over it. This is a part of the dungeon mechanics. She's an official dungeon monster, so she'll be safe. We've already decided on what happens if someone decides to kill her, don't lose it over something like this.
>>715078That should say Noodly! Fixed
>>715078>>715106How are you guys reading those? Top to Bottom or Left to Right, or what?
>>715108it's not that, it's that she was so edgy about it.
>>715110THAT'S A LOT OF STRENGTHRuth is possibly the strongest slime on our team.
>>715122Indisputably the strongest single rune monster we have.
>>715122Easy fix, we put runes on our Demon King clothes so they boost our stats!
>>715114Wonder if aspiring adventurers and dungeon masters in general are taught to roleplay no matter how they actually are
>>715108Its true. We just need to calm down and see what happens as we progress. The dungeon is slightly harder and she gets no bonus token. The archers make it harder. We just need to make sure we npc the ones we have to npc. The kids, Oilivia, etc.
>>715111There is a cipher known as pigpen. Google it and search images.
>>715111I always thought the cipher was read left to right, but I could be wrong, as this version is read right to left(at least for S-Z).Can anyone confirm this? I'm getting conflicting info.
>>715135Our newest minion should be NPC. Also wearing the cat bikini in the gift shop.MARY FOR THE NINE HELLS, UPGRADE YOUR DUNGEON MASTER CLOTHES WITH RUNES!Sorry, got a tad carried away, slushie?
>>715031>>715110>Mary's chest is just "modest."That is as big a tragedy as those stats are. Or rather, as small a tragedy.
So perhaps this topic should be discussed later, but has anyone given any thought over what job we could give Alex? I'm thinking something semi-physical and with a mild level of danger, like the Comfy Slime handler or the Mimic feeder. Something that will allow us to test the waters and see how determined she is to be the best employee she could be.
>>715160Don't worry.When Mary fully becomes a demon it will come with the obligatory chest upgrade.
>>715168Daycare Watcher for the little slimes?
>>715157She's just watching today. But working in the shop may be wise.
Wonder how cartoonishly evil will we find Mary's Audit company be by the end of this questThen again, lawyers
>>715176That works for later. We also upgrade her with runes to test how they work on humans.>>715178She just has to wear the cat bikini and look cute. Remember to set her as a NPC.
Just realised the plan. Maybe we can get space elf to learn to love the slimes. We can win her over. Just a thought.Anyways, we will just wait for tomorrow. Try to win her over while providing a good time.Also we are almost at autosage in one day. Wow...good thing we are /qst/
Every time a new hero arrives the only thing I can think of is "Will they be the one to finally slay Jeffrey?"Anybody else?
>>715265If she really needs resources for her home planet, we could simply hire her as a janitor! All the slimes leave excess runes and what not from the slime trails they leave behind and what not?>>715344But at the same time I dread the day they finally slay it. And what will happen to the dungeon if Jeffrey doesn't respawn after being slain? We need to interfere at a point where we can tag Jeffrey to this dungeon so he can safely respawn by the dungeon's powers. But bottom line is it marks a point where our dungeon is finally beatable and can be speedrun'd and will slowly waste away into non-popularity from overexposure with all the guides being published and common knowledge about Slimecrown being spread to mainstream audiences.
Hey, guys, do you think it's about time we start making actual rooms for our employees? I think that might help boost morale a lot, plus it gives us places to put our awards and gear and shit.
>>715364yeah. like include office space as well for housekeeping and accounting as well.
>>715361I just know we should make a statue for the first person/group to ever beat JeffreyI can only imagine the amount of EXP Jeffrey would give
Meanwhile I wonder if we are going to amass a bunch of disillusioned auditors as employees as time goes on, all wanting to strike out against the company
>>715412or maybe some Dungeon Masters were once Auditors who also got pulled in by the Drachma scam, we should contact them and make a Dungeon Masters Worker Union.
>>715361>And what will happen to the dungeon if Jeffrey doesn't respawn after being slain?What will happen if he does respawn, say... right behind us?
One thing we should try, bring up Moon Elf's stat page. That will bring up some info on her.
Finally found my quote for proposed battle protocol for Lily/RSK>Now to help prevent some of the issues with Lily/RSK, we should maybe have the initial cutscene be unskippable to prevent the ganking of RSK. Maybe Lily casts a barrier spell, and RSK stands at attention at Lily's side. Lily does her monologue, and then drops the barrier and sends out RSK. Then Lily will stay at a comfortable, but not far distance casting some minor spells to buff/debuff or damage. If RSK or Lily gets defeated, they become erratic, as they try to get to the other monster, Lily will cast protection spells on herself to try and revive RSK, once and only once. RSK will try parry and not attack as he gets to Lily to form Queen Lily. The adventurers must keep them apart by any means to take them down. If they don't they suffer a revived RSK or an angry Queen Lily. This gives a definitive protocol and allows for heroes to get by it via plans of attack, but also prevents just rushing the fight.Hope that brings up some ideas for you guys. Meanwhile, I still hold firm that the future protocol for Bloops is.>Spare BloopsToken>Kill BloopsNo token, and archers spawn at the moat to make things a bit more challenging. And a bit of sad dialog from either the Cleric Plant or the Maid/Butler about killing Ms.Bloops. That way they understand in the future.Sets up basic parameters and at least lets them understand what they did wrong. And hey, it adds some flavour for the dungeon in the future.Now we just need a non-raid Curi Boss protocol.>>715361Don't worry so much about that, he's always going to be optional, and by then we'll likely have multiple floors to the citadel with more bosses to fight. Not to mention we could even have another dungeon by then. Space Elf isn't going to beat Jeffrey.
>>715506>we should maybe have the initial cutscene be unskippableWe do use a lot of video game motifs, but I don't think we can actually make Lilly's speech be unskippable.
>>715510The laws of dungeoneering would probably allow us a paralysis spell to lock the party in place during an introduction.
>>715344Nah, I just wonder what sorta tricks they'll have up their sleeve to try beating our dungeonLarro seems to be pulling from a helluva lot of different anime and vidya tropes and references for his heroes. Anyone else wondering just how a Frisk-ripoff Hero would Pacifist their way through Slimecrown? Or how a Megaman-ripoff hero would fare?
>>715539Or the party comp required to beat the dungeon. Technically First Raid did defeat the dungeon on it's first try with various difficulty spikes since they did defeat Curi at the cost of losing 3 out of their 5 party members. with several repeated deaths.
>>715539I'm just waiting for that other duo that he teased for heroes, they're going to be sweet. No I don't have the picture, sorry.>>715510It might yet be doable. I just want to try and prevent anti-cheese.>>715566Still need that Curi protocol. Just don't know what it would be or should be. Curi in raid mode was good, but pretty freaking extreme.
>>715566No technically about it, in my book- a win's a win.
Is it time to pull out the spite traps yet?
>>715621>half damage when wearing metal gauntletsEither those are some sharp barbs or your gauntlets are faulty
>>715621Don't think that fits our M.O really, nor our dungeon's M.O, maybe in a secondary more painful dungeon in the future.That said, I'm still pushing for a slide trap that sends heroes down a garbage chute to fight a monster lurking inside for a mini-boss or 3* monster. Maybe they could find some special loot too!
>>715666Man, realistically a fighting man would know that making gauntlets out of silver means that it's actually faulty since silver is soft. At least I wouldnt fall for it
>>715675anon. Gold is soft. Silver isn't soft.
>>715670Yeah, that's kind of what I had in mind. In a giant storeroom for our citadels' eventual second or third flood. It can be attached to the kitchen.Going to need some earth, water and trash runes to dress it up and give them a soft landing/mobility challenge when fighting the monster inside.
>>715676Silver is harder then gold but ya still wouldn't make shit that needs to hold up to anything out of it
>>715679we could just fill the bottom with wonderful comfy slimes,or with explodey copies
An alternative slide trap
>>715682Eh, it was more about creating something new and creating a really unique fight that the heroes CAN win and get out of and be rewarded for, inadvertently. That and hey, it can make a great incentive for our spa, after all.I also just like Star Wars
>>715692you mean a various different number of chutes that lead to certain doom but only one of them leads to the comfy spa? And that the chute routes are randomized between every run?
>>715699Nah, though that is a pretty neat idea.I mean something similar to when the Raid got sullied by explodeies and mud slimes. Don't know about you, but fighting a monster in a garbage pit does not do wonders for your hygiene. So why not go to the spa afterwords for cleanup and some R&R?And hey, in the garbage pit you found a sword or a shield or some magic item. So it's not a wasted(pardon the pun) trip down to the start again.
>>715506>And a bit of sad dialog from either the Cleric Plant or the Maid/Butler about killing Ms.Bloops.I disagree with this. What's the point of having a token as a reward if we encourage every hero to get it?
>>715168Check with our other staff if she can safely leave then implement>>713912>>713096but go old school, assuming some part of the feuda system remains we probably count as having been abandoned by our liege. In Rome a slave who got sick and wasn't cared for was freed when he recovered so it's not a stretch to argue that we sustained an injury in the line of duty and after reporting it in along with our success in reclaiming the property were abandoned by our lord.This should let both of us get what we want.>>713203I've got your back Anon.
Ink rune from the pen! Make Ink Slimes.Or will we need a cephalopod for that?
>>715685I'd love to know where you got those images.
>>715872a dungeon trap building thread on /tg/ years ago
Water+Music+Fancy= Idol Slimes.
>>715872>>715873most of them come from a book called GrimTooth's traps
>>715876Found a pdf of that.Though I am now curious about a new possible trap building thread on /tg/.Was the old one any good?
>>715880Alot of old school traps, and it kind of just spiraled into unfair and unwinnable shit
>>715875Fuck, we need this
>>715876A lot of GrimTooth traps are just impossible to deal with, though. We don't want that.
>>715892Probably not but I do think we should begin working towards getting a larger dungeon and having themed runs rather than our current hub with a mishmash of encounters. Now that we have Alex we have an operative who can perform tasks outside the dungeon and do legal stuff like buy the surrounding land we should be thinking big. Get some paper and ink runes along with fancy and we can make a Bureausplat to handle the paperwork.
>>715955We might expand the spa into general entertainment stuff as well. Get some more dosh.>>715892Some of that stuff gives me an idea for a trap on a bigger level (not for this dungeon of course).Basically, it's letting the adventurers go through the dungeon unimpeded with no traps, monsters, or locked doors, and all the loot's there for the taking. Once they reach the end, everything activates: traps, monsters, restricted access, ect. Now the challenge isn't going in the dungeon, but getting out with your loot. There are no cleared rooms from which to leave and rest, to try again and get farther the next day.
>>715862I thought that initially the idea was to use it to introduce the token system that way.I mean the dialog was more about adding flavour to the dungeon. But it doesn't have to be am absolute.>>715955I would argue that our dungeon is a themed run. Its a slime castle with a majority of slime minions. Sure we can make some adjustments later to tighten up that theme. But I don't think we need to mess with it.
>>715955Absolutely. Although the encounters are good for standard adventurers, events like 'So You Think You Can Slime' are what make us unique. Same with the spa and the token system. They make sure that the adventurers aren't just challenged, but they have fun as well.There's a lot of possibility for other 'fun' events, we just need to get creative. A quiz show, an eating contest, a rap battle, we just need to throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks.
>>715977Slimes are pretty awesome, there's no need to mess with the formula. Thing is, we've mostly been working on water-elemental themes for this dungeon. One idea I had was the introduction of floors, each with their own terrain theme. A forest floor, a volcano floor, a dark temple floor, a desert floor, each with its own types of slimes, traps and challenges. It would add variety and give us something to work towards.
>>715997A military themed floor with a magma slime forge complex, perhaps?
>>715997I suppose that's one way of doing it. So long as there are certain aspects that are kept to keep it a castle in nature.I.E if the forest floor has the kitchen, then expect magma slimes in said kitchen, and maybe a few other fire monsters. But this is still predominantly a nature domain.That and enemies like our archers/footmen and the occasional special water based minion shows up.The idea of doing some themed slime princesses for each boss is tempting.I.E A Magma Slime Princess is hot blooded and tomboyish, a shy princess is a mud slime.I won't subscribe to the idea in full, but I expect more experimentation is necessary before we go that route.
>>716005A whole bunch of slime princesses with varying personalities? I love it.
We really do need to assign Alex a place in our organization. After all, why hire an employee if you don't have a place for them. She may need a class change though. Along with all the 'benefits' and 'enhancements' that come along with it.
>>716005Maybe we eventually promote Lily/RKS to be the boss of the water floor, and leave MOS to be the big end of dungeon boss. [Jeffrey for people who can beat the boss rush]
>>716014I suggested this last thread but some proposed examples include...>Rosa, The Elegant. The most dignified of the slime princesses, fights with a bow and arrow, extremely polite. Hide behind terrain or suffer from her magic bow.>Mirielle, The Brash. Our tomboy princess, fights with gauntlets, rides a giant frog, combined indoor/outdoor battle on the ramparts>Sophie, The ShyCan be a boss princess, but also a sidequest princess, extremely sad and shy because she's lost something(an item that you can either buy at the store or as a rare drop from some boss or mini-boss monster). Will give the players a great reward and passage into the next level if you can give her her lost item>>716016Definitely an idea. But I kind of prefer that the queen be fought last. Because royalty. But that's just me. We'd probably have to alter it a bit so that Lily is just a queen herself, but the RSK gets to be the mini-boss right before becoming Royal Slime Champion.