Oh shit nigger(s) it's the aftermath of Civ Thing and all the tribes who inhabitited the nondescript generic fantasy land has all been enslaved by The Kingdom ruling the aforementioned nondescript generic fantasy land.Now they must either accept their fate or break out and free their own tribe. Other tribes optional.Your current protagonist is a member of the goblin tribe, which was absorbed into The Kingdom and now live as workers in various workshops and factories.You are also secretly the heir of a former goblin king - King Gob I, as indicated by your tuff of hair that suspiciously resembles a shittily drawn crown.Currently you're in the middle of a regular work day, what do you do?Roll 1d100, who gets the highest number is the picked action.Previous threads:http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2Ahttps://www.mediafire.com/folder/ici3zlnn9ytyy/ADVENTURES
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600481Ask the manlet beside you if the lockpicks are finished. Whispering
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>600481build a giant self face punching mechanism
>>600484"what lockipicks?" he whispered back
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>600495self punching ones
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>600500do you want to be free again or not, wuss?
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>600500Just make the lockpick for our cell
>>600502"I'm not sure how self punching lockipicks fit into that"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>600506Don't worry about ithow are we doing on stealing tech?
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>600506it's to fool guards up so they won't think it's a lockpick
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>600506>>600505
>>600510"Were we supposed to do that?"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>600517Yea. Kinda. Also. I said mystery box, not dice cube
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>600517oh hey, is that the two I rolled?niceyes, but do it discretelydisguise it as putting extra work in so it looks like we're working hard
>>600521"Greetings, tiny workers. Is everything well?""Uh...yes?"
>>600481oh shit nigger Orcs represent!
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>600524Yes. Sir. Just doing what we love.
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>600524fart to distract the guard.
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>600524Yes sir. Working hard as usual.
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>600524Your armor looks shiny today, Sir. We're just doing manlet things like working.
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600524where my manlet skeletons brothers?
>>600531The paladins probably purged them
>>600531more importantly, where are the manlet impo brothers? Other than hooded bones I feel there's a good chance that they were already cleansed and back to being just regular lifeless skeletons.
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>600538>>600526
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>600538Get back to work so the guard continues walking and covering his nose to avoid the smell.
>>600536I'm sure the Kobolds and Imps exist, Paladin is just too lazy to draw them
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>600538that fart is posionus for humans
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>600538go back to work as if nothing happened.
>>600539"Riggght, I'll leave you to your work then"
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>600553[WORKING INTENSIFIES]
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>600553Continue disguised lockpicks.
>>600553work on lock pics
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>600553>>600558fug
I like how calm and relaxed this is compared to wanpan's thread
>>600561Because there's barely anobody in it, ayyyy
>>600561I was thinking the same thing.
>>600555Secretly working on lockipicks in secret
>>600561not enough salt / 10
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>600567Meanwhile the skelegobbos...
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>600567Where's the other heir, Prince Kobs the II?surely he's your best friend?
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>600567hide them into fake tools which are empty inside
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>600567Work on stealing their tech whole making the lockpicks
>>600561the secret is that there are no elves yet to post about Sad One
>>600577*while>>600561We're manlets. We have to be just as methodical as we were in the civ threads.
>>600570Are currently in hiding, being watched over by Skelebro and Skelebro Jr. With the news that paladins are going to hunt down and purge the tribal skeles, they are now on the run/
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>600584>>600572
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>600584oh shiiietthat's pure genocide in worksgotta help fellow skellebrosplan escape intensively
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>600586shit, rolling for this.>>600587they're skeletons, you can literally just reanimate them afterwards.
>>600587we're gonna have to get the other races out toothe gobbos are the only ones capable of making tools right now I think
>>600584Yay skelebro and skelebro jr!True heroes
>>600587Now what should the plan be
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>600593We've gotta break out the other races, we can't do it alone with our strength. We need numbers, we should distribute the hidden tech we make to the other tribes so they can escape with us. Lockpicks are just the first step to freedom.Also >>600572 asking for this
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>600593releasing every prisoner from their cells at the same time during either night or some sort of event when nobody cares for savages
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>600593Hide the lockpicks in the fattest gobbos fat folds.Thats step 2
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>600593Build fake skeletons that is powering by steam engine.
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>600593hide under boxes and sneak.
>>600598Of course!....But you don't know how to.
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>600601We'll learn by watching the humans. We just need time to steal their tech.Also, where's Prince Kobs the II?
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>600601aren't we making toys right now? can't you make some skellelooking toys?and you call yourself a manlet?
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>600601meanwhile, Prince Kobs
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>600601Work on stealing their tech while making the lockpicks. Use the time to look for any potential weaknesses in the kingdom's tech as well.
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>600601Or rather>>600595
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>600601Try to remember the time he failed to build his first "steam engine". He accidently use oil instead for water, ending up his "stam engine" to blow up.
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>600609throw rock at him
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>600609oh goodlet's keep working on those lockpicks we'll recruit prince kobs after work
>>600611Rock thrown, roll 2d100 for results.
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>600609>brief flash of memory of an older guy who looks like Kob usurping an older guy who looks like you from what looks like a throne
Rolled 13, 65 = 78 (2d100)>>600615HEY, COME JOIN OUR PLOT you say while whispering
Rolled 67, 36 = 103 (2d100)>>600615great success
Rolled 83, 88 = 171 (2d100)>>600615Catch it son!!!
>>600616actually, King Gobbo the I died while travelling towards the MawKing Kobbo the I was elected afterwards
Rolled 92 (1d100)oh.>>600615Rolling
>>600619A very nice throw. So nice it killed him
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>600622Ignite a Gobbo v Kobbo Race War
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>600622Walk away while whistlingSmile as you've just killed the other heir to the throne
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>600622Shed a tear for the loss of your fellow manlet. Go back to this >>600605
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>600622Naaahh... it don't killed him at all, it only make him stronger and it slowly awoke his dragon powers.
Rolled 98 (1d100)whoops>>600622'tis is but a scratch
>>600631Nice. Keep the gobbos pure. I like it
>>600623"ALRIGHT, STOP WHAT YOUR'E DOING RIGHT NOW!""WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?"Yelled the guards
>>600633I was too late,sorry>>60063>"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?"elves
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>600634Guards break up the fightgod damn kobbos throw the the bird at the kobbos with your middle finger and waggle it
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>600634Prince Kobs the II is still alive and awoke his spirit Stand.
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>600634>>600636fug the reckoning
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>600634Hide in wherever they store the crap we build amidst the confusion along with Gobbo we talked with earlier. We escaping tonite
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>600634It was an accident sir. The rock was enchanted I swear. There's no fucking way a manlet would have that much strength!
>>600641woah holy shit, I really though Solid was getting this roll but apparently I drank some lucky juice today.
>>600644my action was shit anyway
>>600639"The fuck he is! This Kobold is dead! Now who can tell me what happened? Come on, don't be shy, this is now a murder investigation."
>>600641>>600644might be too slowalways think of your reply quickbecause the time limit is one minute after the first reply
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>600646>>600642
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>600646No one snitchescause we all equal down heregobbos and kobbos start working together again cause we're manlets
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>600647yeah damn lol>>600646He called you a faggot I swear! HE AND THE OTHER KOBBOS WERE PLANNING AN UPRISING
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>600646throw a rock at a guard"like this"
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>600646The reason we toss the rock at our son is because our son will fake his own dead and he is DAMN GOOD faking his own dead because of his manling ancestry.
>>600647>because the time limit is one minute after the first replycan we enlarge that to 2 minutes? OP? cause sometimes update shows up way later.
>>600648"AH! So you admit to being the culprit!"
>>600647>>6006543 of the posts were chosen 3 minutes later
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>600656There's no way we could've killed one of our own, Sir. The Elves must have broken in to sabotage our work!
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>600656I demand a lawyer!
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600656I didn't say that, it was that filthy Kobbo behind me. *Roll for Speech*
>>600657fuck chrome, making my rolls useless
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>600656Look at my arms. They're as flimsy as cooked spaghetti. How could i have murdered anything with these?Someone or something must have clearly enchanted the rock. Only a fool would be unable to see this, and the knights of the kingdom are no fools.
>>600658"HE'S LYING!""WE SAW HIM DID IT!""EXECUTE THE TRAITOR!"Yelled the kobolds
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>600663Gobbos back me up! Are you gonna take that from these Kobbos?
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>600663The Kobolds would do anything to save their hide, Sir! They're just salty because their heir to the throne is dead! Besides, they're born from dragons, they're butthurt naturally!
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>600663>>600659
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>600663Look at my arms. They're as flimsy as cooked spaghetti. How could i have murdered anything with these?Someone or something must have clearly enchanted the rock. Only a fool would be unable to see this, and neither the manlets or the kingdom's knights are fools.
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>600663Do the manly tears.
>>600664"THAT'S BULLSHIT AND YOU KNOW IT!""WE SAW NO SUCH THING!""OBVIOUSLY THAT KOBOLD WAS WEAKSHIT TO DIE FROM A STUPID ROCK"Racial tensions rising
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>600671The guards separate our workspaces for the time being so the racial tensions calm down.
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>600671I blame dragons
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>600671The imps pop up and stopped the racial tension by talking about peace and love <spoiler>and also raping human women</spoiler>
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>600671throw another rock amidst the confusion. Towards the very important factory thing that's strangely left in a vulnerable spot
>>600672"Come on, move it"The manlets now work in separate areas
>>600676hide elsewhere during confusionand hide your crownfor disguise purposes
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>600676note to self, rock throwing is a great way to kill your fellow manletslet's work out to celebrate our victory over our rival and improve our rock throwing skills>>600678the crown is just a piece of hair that looks like a crown
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>600676fug return of fug >>600678
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>600676alas another 99 get of mine disregarded >>600675we are now stationed slightly farther from the guards.>>600678It's your hair.
>>600681That was like 4 monutes late
>>600681>It's your hair.>>600679>the crown is just a piece of hair that looks like a crowntime to shave then
>>600679Right, working out. Time to lift this piece of metal, shouldn't be too hard
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>600684do it 100 times
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600684[LIFTING INTENSIFIES]
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>600684You just fucking killed someone with a fucking pebble. Lift it to realize that factory work has largely improved your physical capabilities.
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600683lol no never>>600684stretch out first, do some warm ups. Don't wanna pull a muscle
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>600692>>600690
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>600692get tired
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>600692ALRIGHTLET'S LIFT THIS FUCKING PIPE>>600690>>600687
>>600692start punching self in the face, we want to get pumped up real good.>>600695critical fail
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>600697SHIT
>>600693Yeah! You gotta be super strong now! Time to lift this sucka
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>600700WE LIFT IT WITHOUT BREAKING A SWEAT
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>600700it actually a trap door to the basement
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>600700Get back to making lockpicks faggot
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>600700We lift so hard the bar blasts off and bursts through the ceiling
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>600700fucking damnit this time my roll will count. It's actually very light, not light enough to be a piece of cake but light enough to not break your manlet bones
This quest got so shit so fast
>>600702And you can't even lift it
>>600702Goddammit rockman. And here I thought you'd be proud after we literally murdered someone via rock throwing.
>>600707I just threw a rock
>>600708>>600704While screaming "MAXIMUM EFFORT"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>600708THIS TIME TRY AGAINWE'LL ROLL DICE FOR IT SO WE CAN BOOST OUR STRENGTH
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>600711fuck
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>600708it's actually because you're supposed to push it, push it instead.
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>600708look for a keyhole
>>600709that's part of everyday life, what so special about it?
>>600713Charging up manlet powerRoll 2d100, second number is the result1-99: no100: yes
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>600719WHERE'S MY MANLETS AT?LET'S FUCKING DO THIS
Rolled 79, 64 = 143 (2d100)>>600719HULK OUT!!!!!!!
Rolled 33, 42 = 75 (2d100)>>600719Rolling.
Rolled 62, 86 = 148 (2d100)>>600719oh shit, I forgot the 2d100woopsAGAIN
Rolled 58, 22 = 80 (2d100)>>600717Not for us manlets it aint. Everyday life with us means research, actual acid and explosions.>>600719Ah yes lovely...>>600720This clearly aint happening. We should examine the rock if possible later to see if it was enchanted and if not we should just go back to breaking out.
Rolled 37, 71 = 108 (2d100)>>600719find a keyhole instead damn it
>>600721Shit, you hurt your back
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>600727Blame the Kobbos.
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>600727Take a breather for nowlet's use the lockpick we made earlier on the keyhole if there is one
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>600727you can hear barbarian "wuss" from afar
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>600727This clearly aint happening. We should examine the rock if possible later to see if it was enchanted.
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>600727Naahhh.... just our imagination... try multitasking by lockpicking and lifting at same time.
OP might be ded
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>600736Relax for a bit, try to open the trap door by using the lockpick through the keyhole to unlock it.
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>600736look for trap door keyhole instead
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>600736Back to lockpicks . What were we thinking?
>>600746"What are you you doing?" asked one of the other goblins as you crawl around the floor
hey, let's stick with tech actions instead of physical actionsif you get what I'm sayinglet's use our brains instead of brawn
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>600736Notice a hole in the ground, it's a keyhole to the trapdoor
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>600752Doesn't look like there's any keyholesLet's keep producing lockpicksWhisper this to that Gobbo and share the design so we can mass produce it.This will be our first tech that we come up with in here.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>600752Kobbos broke my back>>600754nice
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>600752keyhole for the trap door to hidden basement which contains giant robot factory which we'll use to break free
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>600752Say you have an idea of looking for hidden trapdoors
>>600759"And why are you looking for hidden trap doors?"
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>600762So we can escapelet's get back to work and keep producing lockpicks in secret as our tech action>>600755
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>600762to find our giant robot
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>600762"Because... Why not?!"
>>600765You WANT to be here?
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>600765The Kingdom, little Gobbo.It's not right that we have to work like slaves under the tall ones, they're assholes, remember? Now help me make more lockpicks.
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>600765>>600767
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>600765Look gob, do you really want these humans as your overlords? Look at the things they make us... make! Not up to Goblin standards!
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>600765slave to the dragons one day - slave forever
>>600769"Well, we are under official employ. Got a daily salary, individual housing and free healthcare."
>>600765He's actually an Imp Spy sent by the Kobbos, THROW A ROCK AT HIM
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>600772Wait. You are getting paid?
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>600771hey, we were free when we escaped the dragonsnow the dragons are nothing but a husk of their former selves>>600772That's just being a slave. We've got to be independent and free from the humans just like we escaped from the dragons back in the citadel.
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>600772that manlet hears "WUSS" from afar
>>600774"Well yeah, we're citizens, not slaves like the other tribes cuz we had that Kingdom Seal"
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>600777OH SHIT we exclaim quietlyNo need to escape right now then. Let's plot and create our own tech and gain independence when the time is right. Back to work, gobbos.
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>600777GASP
>>600779Welp. I fucked us. We ate the seal. I thought they were gonna frame us for murder.
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>600777>Orc Player hereWait what. Shit. You mean we could be citizens? Then why is everyone bald?
>>600780we had the seal?fuck kingdom anywaywhat you wanna do, be wageslave?
>>600783we're not gonna be wageslaveswe're gonna create tech to escape somehow
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>600783>He wants to be a NEETFuck this shit, we be on a quest to restore Gob back to kinghood instead.
>>600783We would have had an easier time LEAVING than the arena. And the skellies might not be hunted .And yes. The caravan with swords and shit had a seal. I ate it cuz i thought it would pin us to the pillaging and didnt wanna get rekt by the king.
>>600778Exclaiming oh shit quietly>>600782THis actually had nothing to do with the Kingdom. Manlet hair and snazzy borders were taken away in Civ Thing due to this fag >>600784 samefagging. It was divine punishment
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>600785I'm not orc, fuck you, my roll is betterI wanna raid shit and play heavy metal while piloting giant robots
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600787I take full responsibility for itactuallyLord Imp Inventor shaved the manlet's hair when he was in chargeget your facts right, OP>>600787Is there a way for us to get a position in the King's government as part of his council?
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>600787Create a labor unionDemand to speak with the king
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>600786They're still being hunted for account of being pure evil. What the heck did you mean you ate it? You guys never had the seal. Us orcs found it and gave it to the manlets as a token of appreciation.>>600787Feel goblin guilt for what's happening to the orcs.>>600788hey fuck you rock chucker
>>600787SIEG ZEON INDEPENDENCE FOR MANLETS
>>600791>>600788HUMAN VS ORCS RACE WAR NOWactually cool it nerdsif you both want your tribes to escape since you're located in the arena, you have to put your faith into us gobbos
>>600791The Barbarians came across a ruined caravan. When we found weapons laying around, OP stated we found a paper with a seal on it. I immediately replied with "a barbarian eats it" and proceeded to be taunted by dragons for fucking ourselves over.
>>600795ah oh yeah I think I remember that now.
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>600798resolve to help out fellow greenskins however we can.
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>600798Are we off work hours? We should visit the Arena and give the orcs a visit.
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>600798>>600799and mini skellebros
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>600798check with the other gobbos if they are satisfied with their lives
>>600801but not the Elves since they don't owe manlets jackshit.
>>600804obviously. including dragons
>>600801Resolving to save fellow greenskins and skellies
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600804>>600805no elves and dragonsanybody that has had stuff up their butt we won't save>>600806Alright, let's skip to after work and visit the Arena and scope the place out to see if there's and weakpoints and so we can talk with the Orcs.
>>600806go back home and check our digs.
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>600806Go visit the city once the workday is over
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>600806You gotta to what you gotta doform a work union called Zieg Seon
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600808Rolling for this
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>600806Ask a knowledgeable guard about what the manlets are permitted to do.Also apologize sincerely about the bullshit that happened with the kobold heir. Accepting to give them your dessert for an entire month as a sign of apology.
>>600814Gotta be faster, archivistthis ain't civ thing 1, it's an adventure
>>600816IRL shit happened. Was only able to drop in right now.
>>600810Speaking of workday being over, a guard rings the bell, signalling the work day being over, yeah."Alright, it's closing time! As usual head towards the exit and recieve your daily pay in an orderly fashion! No pushing"
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>600817Still, try to reply as quickly as you can once OP gets the post up.>>600819Let's get our dosh and visit the arena so we can bet on someone and see if wanpan and the other orcs are there.
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>600819don't forget to get some lockpicks out with you
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>600821
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>600819Proceed, and apologize to the kobbos
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>600819>>600814Give your dessert to the kobolds and man the fuck up, like a true king.>>600821On it
>>600825"Ayyy, sorry for killing your heir to the thrne. No hard feelings eh?"
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>600829>>600826
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>600829We hug it out, cause we all equal down here. We humbly apologize and bow down to them and offer them some of our spare cash.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>600829This causes the Kobbos to riot.
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>600829Look a little more convincing, and propose some cash, since their ancestors are dragons
>>600831Ah yes, sharing your cash could work, speaking of which"Gob the II, here's your daily salary, 150 gold coins, as usual. Do try to save it"
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>600834We might have to use some of this in betting and rent, let's give about 10% of it, so 15 gold coins to the Kobbo. Also, look more convincing and sorry about it like >>600833 said
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>600834Wonder what you can do with 150 gold coins
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>600834go straight to the arena
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>600834give kobold one coin
>>600835Saying sorry and offering 15 gold coins to the Kobolds. Wonder if this'll work. Roll 2d100, second number is the results1-19: extremely terrible20-39: bad40-79: okay80-100: good
Rolled 75, 62 = 137 (2d100)>>600841PLEASE ACCEPT OUR OFFER FELLOW MANLETS
Rolled 23, 24 = 47 (2d100)>>600841threw coins as a rock
Rolled 13, 60 = 73 (2d100)>>600841
>>600842YOur grovelling and snivelling has induced some pity in the kobolds and they accept your apology, for now
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>600847ALRIGHTLET'S HEAD TO THE ARENA SO WE CAN FREE OURSELVES OF GUILTWE'LL SCOPE THE PLACE OUT AND TALK WITH THE ORCS
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600847NiceWhat can you buy with 135 gold coins ?How much is a loaf of bread
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>600847>>600849you go there just for gambling on fights tho
>>600851eh, we'll sneak in.
>>600849And so you went to the arena with some other gobs. There's a guy advertising betting on fights
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>600855ayo"Whose fighting now and what are the odds?" we ask to the dude behind the counter advertising bets
>>600855bet everything on barbarian
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>600855Check who is fighting
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>600855fug, revenge of fug>>600857
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>600855Look and see if Wan Pan has any matches.
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>600855We should invest that shit in a small scale lab so we can invent ways to make more money and start buying land outside the kingdom walls.
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>600863Let's bet 15 coins on WanPan so we can get our investment from saying sorry to the Kobbos back.
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>600863stampede ground, bet everything on barbs
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600863Bet half of your money on Clubber, and hope wanpan punches himself out like he always does
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>600863Bet half of it on Orcs! (Obviously includes Wan Pan, and yes even Gorc somehow) GREEN SKINS STICK TOGETHER.So>50 G on Wanpan in Wanpan vs Clubber>10 G each on Wanpan and Gorc>40 G on Orcs in Barbs vs Orcs
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>600863>>600862Leggo>>600866This'll end well...
>>600868That ended surprisingly well
>inb4 this is actually from the same day we played as Wan Panit even makes sense, Wan Pan's first fight is against a Barb with a club and his 2nd fight is with an Orc.
>>600868meant for >>600865 instead of >>600866
>>600868Hmmm yes, maybe you shouldn't test your luck in the bets. Perhaps starting a small lab would be better
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>600873"BET EVERYTHING YOU WUSS"you hear from arena
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>600873Let's go with the safe investment and start a small lab and expand from there. Betting is just gambling and we're smarter than that.
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>600873First things first, before starting a lab, check where you and your fellow manlets live
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>600873A safe investment would be best. Through it we can start working on freedom for all races, and end up with some sweet ass tech.
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>600873At least stay and watch Wan Pan's fight
>>600874Who keeps yelling that, seriously
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>600879>>600875>>600877Someone whose rock solid yet can't get it upLet's buy some cheap land to get our business started.
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>600879Buy a jerky from a vendor and savor it knowing those filthy barbarians can't have a taste of this meaty goodness.
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>600879"MANLETS GOT NO BALLS"you decide to follow the voice, it brings you to the window of barbarian jail
>>600880>>600879Why buy land ? We may already have a housing with the other manlets
>>600886you don't shit where you eat. When the crackdown comes, you want it far away from your homebase.
>>600886Protecting our tech secrets is our highest priority.We won't be doing anything illegal, the guards will sniff it from a mile away, but selling new tech as a service would allow us to accumulate a small fortune without us having to give our secrets away.
>>600880And to do that, you'll ahve to visit the castle.A guard asks what's your busines there
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>600889We've come to buy some land with our coin. Straight and to the point.
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>600889We want to buy land. In your most smooth voice.
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>600889wanna talk with king.while you are at it you still hear "WUSS" from afar
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>600890This
>>600891"Proceed down the hall, then turn left"
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>600895We do that, while looking around to see what's changed since the last time we've been here
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>600895turn right instead after going down
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>600895>>600896
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>600895Thanks. >>600896This
>>600896Statues litter the hall. All of them have a tiny plaque underneath that reads "Made from melted down tribal treasures"
>>600906That was an interesting mis-click
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>600906the statues are fedora neckbeards?
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>600906More draggos commit suicide. And one elf.
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>600907consider neckbeard statue canon from now
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>600907Closely examine the armor design so we can use it later.
>>600907So the statues are solid gold ?How much is gold worse in this kingdomThis may be the reason dragons commit suicide
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>600913*worthand roll
>>600908"oh yes, it's meant to capture the spirit of the common man....who lives in his parents' basement"
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>600907Ignore the statues, there is land to be bought
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>600907Elves represent!Study dem statues. They look like good decorations
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>600915Compliment their craftsmanship and continue moving
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>600915We compliment the art design and examine the statue armor in >>600907 so we can >>600912 use it later.
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>600915are there a lot of those?
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>600915Wow. You are really cultured, Mr. Castle Guard. Tell me more!
>>600921"Only a handful. Like this one depecting a barbarian neckbeard. We're gonna ship it to their cells in the arena later. It's even carved out from a rock"
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>600925>>600919Also thank the kind guard for his time
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>600925I dont get it. That one looks like an elf, but it has no beard. It just has a bad smell and long hair.
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>600925>>600920Very nice. Let's study their craftsmanship like the armor statue and go on our way to buy land.
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>600925But that's statue is a myth, I've know barbarians, they are all physically muscular thanks to awesome rock throwing culture.
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>600925>"Made from melted down tribal treasures"So barbarians were hoarding rocks ?Anyway, thanks the guard and continueTip him a few coins
>>600929But the statue has a beard. And dosen't have any hair. And stone dosen't smell.Did the barbarians somehow steal our weed?
>>600934Im speaking as prince gobbo
>>600935Damn gobbos stealing our drugs for experiments.
>>600929"Ah, the elf statue. Well you see, we have discovered that elves are incapable of growing facial hair, so we had to make do. The smell comes from the wood we used to make this, we're gonna put this thing in the fields the elves work on, ya know, for motivation. But mostly as a scarecrow."
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>600938I start to think that your sculptor has some fetish for THICK guys
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>600938>>600927
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>600938Do you have any Orc Sculpts?
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>600938Where's the gobbo's statue
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>600938What about the Orc statue?
>>600942"Oh yeah. It's literally jsut a ball of cements with some things stuck onto it to kinda sorta resemble an orc face. It's to properly emulate the Orc style"
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>600947>>600940
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>600947Are those... dragon teeth?
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>600947Alright, enough messing about. Thank the Guard for showing us the sculptures while we go down the hall and turn left.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>600947>See Orc>Remember Kingdom Seal Deal>It Ain't Me Plays
>>600947Fascinating. We must go however.>>600941
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>600955Forgot the friggin roll.
>>600953You collapse onto the floor due the weight of your guilt as music plays inside your head
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>600958Back to business. Nothing we can do this second. Thank the guard as well.
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>600958We have to buy that land and make enough money to buy out the other races out of their slavery.>>600960 This.
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>600958find trap door
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>600958>>600960
>>600962If only you roll this good when we hunted back in the day
>>600962No trap door found
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>600968Stand up, pack up our shit and proceed to whatever we was gonna do before we got distracted
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>600968your skills suck, wuss
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>600968>>600960Let's buy that land!
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>600968Get up, thank the guard and go buy that land so we can start working on some Tech.
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>600968>>600960
>>600970"Ah yes, greetings little goblin. What brings you here?" asked the Land Wizard, overseer of Real Estate
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>600979I've come to buy land so we may start our own business and contribute to the realm, Mr. Land Wizard.
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>600982
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>600979how much for square meter
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>600979Greetings sir, I wish to buy a small plot of land so that I may start a small business.
>>600982"Hmmm, yes, yes. A noble mission. Now let's see here...according to the records, the cheapest plots of land available is 1000 gold. Do you want to start there?"
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>600989Oh, we'll have to save up for that, Mr. Wizard. Is there a way we could rent it instead?Fucking hell, I'm getting too tired for thisArchivist, I give you the title of Duke Archivist until I wake. Peace.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>600989are there any special offers for startups?
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>600989We check our savings to see if we have enough. If we do we buy one of the cheapest ones. Otherwise we check if we can pay in installments and how much each installment costs.
>>600992AW SHIT NIGGAAAAAAAAAAA
>>600992I am become manlet, buyer of worlds
>>600992YOUR ENTIRE SAVINGS IS....135 gold coins.You haven't been frugal the past months
>>600993Does this mean I get to keep the fancy title?
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>601000Check if we can pay in installments and how much each installment costs.
>>601000Contact the other manlets with your magic phone to ask them if they can contribute
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>601000>>600991
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>601001YeeeFor that Nat 100, yes. Now I sleep.>>601000>>601002supporting
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>601000ask how much in installments, punch self in face
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>601000>>601003fug
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>601000Ask if installments are possible.Also dragon suicide cutscene.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>601000Wait wait wait. Are there any adventurer-like jobs around? A kingdom like this should have one.
>>601010Manlets are weak. Wouldnt suggest that
>>601006"A hundred coins per installment"
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>601013Great offer! Lets do it.
>>601010>gobbos and kobbos go adventuring>encounter a real adventurer party>get mistaken for low level monsters>get slaughtered>>601013Accept the offer
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601013So be it. We'll purchase one of the cheaper plots and we'll pay the installments with our daily wage.Does the plot include any sort of small building or something?
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>601013fuck loanslet's go win all money via arena and buy land on spot
>>601022I... holy shit...
>>601018Well I forgot to roll ag->>601022HOLY SHIT we better have a small workshop with that roll
>>601015"Great! Just sign here"
>>601025THIS THING IS RIGGEDlet's go betting while you are at it
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>601027Check the back of the contract
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>601027eat paper
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>601027Read back of it
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>601027Sign it. Ask if it includes a small workshop/building where we can work.
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>601027Realize you do not have a pen
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>601042Agree and sign
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>601042Excellent. Sign it. And ask if there's a small workshop included.
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>601042Wait wait wait, we don't even know what we're buyingAsk the wizzard how the plot is
>>601046Holy shit man, you're on the hunt.
>>601022>>600992>>601046>>601045>>601048Pause!!!!Dice God. The fuck, man?
>>601046Dice god? Are you there?
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>601042realize that you can't read
>>601046"Eh, depends on which polt of land you choose after you done your payments. They're like 5 to choose from"
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>601054Ok. We spend the next 10 days working and using the money from our daily wage to pay the installments.
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>601054mystery box time?
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>601050>>601053The fuuuuck!?>>601054Sweet. Can I see some images?
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>601054Fast forward to the time you have enough money
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>601054Sign, pay and check the plots
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>601056meanwhile our fellow miniskellebros will all be dead.JUST GAMBLE THE NEEDED SUM
>>601059"Very well, the first one is just an empty plot of land out in the outskirts of the city, next is an empty lot in the civilian quarters, then another empty lot in the factory district, next is a lot with an abandoned house left there so long it comes with the land too, finally theres a patch of land that used to belong to a merchant, even built a workshop there....but since his business went down, he left the city and abandoned it....Not a good choice though, as that place is in the ghetto"
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>601078>merchant, even built a workshop there....but since his business went down, he left the city and abandoned it....Not a good choice though, as that place is in the ghetto"this one
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601078Take the last one, and see if you can move in with all the others manletsStrenght lies in numbers
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>601078Empty one in the outskirts. We'll build something there later. Isolation is best if we don't want people to steal our tech.
>>601084"Well it's your choice. Anyway, do you want to start paying today or tomorrow?"
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>601096We start today.
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>601096tomorrow
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>601099Tomorrow, today we check if we can buy a dragon to guard our workshop
>>601108they are all will be dead soon
>>601108Not a bad idea. They're hoardless so they'll probably work for cheap.
>>601108>>601096>>601113fug I linked the wrong post
>>601099YOu now have 35 coins
>>601124Welp. Deposit the remainder at the nearest bank. Pay the installments over the next few days.
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>601131Forgot to fucking roll...
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>601124BET IT ALL ON BARBARIANS ON ARENA
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>601124Put the rest at the bank
>>601133Just in time for the Stampede round, where a group of barbs and orcs fight against a stampede of Kingdom-grown beasts
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>601139CHEER FOR BARBARIANS. YEEEAAH
>>601139Check the odds
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>601139Cheer the barbs
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>601145
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>601145
>>601146Sadly both teams were brutally murdered by the beasts
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>601153THIS IS RIGGEDBARBS USED TO KILL BEASTS FOR BREAKFAST
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>601153>Sell crown and clothes>Use money to continue gambling
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>601153Work hard for the next few days paying the installments for the plots of land.>>601157The fuck were you expecting? A friendly rock throwing competition?
>>601157Those were wild, untrained beasts.
>>601165and what we were killing in civ thread? cows?I'm telling ya somthing dirty going on down there in arenathose were not real barbs
>>601161It's not a crown, it's a tuff of hair shaped like a crown
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>601169Don't sell your clothes. Go home. Work for the next few days so we can start doing science in our ghetto workshop.
>>601168>barb hasn't realize how low barbarian powerlevel actually is compared to Kingdom stuff
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>601169since we lost everything, lets look at the land we're buying
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>601169>Shave head>Attempt to sell hair to bald person
>>601169sell it anyway to shady people in coats which totally not practicing forbidden magic
>>601169Find out who is in charge of the dragon labourers, and see how much it is to rent one
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>601169 >>601178sell it anyway to shady people in coats which totally not practicing forbidden magic>>601175we were not against kingdom forces, but beasts
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>601180>>601169
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>601169check out your land
>>601174And so you went back to your cozy home in the civilian quarters
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>601202check kitchen for food
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>601202sneak at night to the arenasomething fishy is going on there
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601202Start working on design plans for traps with which to rig your workshop. You don't want your shit to get stolen.
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>601202Go to sleep, it's late alreadySteal some food from the kobbos
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601202>House: Become fractionally less cozy
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>601202investigate home. anyone else around?
>>601209And so you started drawing up plans for traps to put in your soon-to-be workshop. Illuminated by your Limited Edition Snek Lamp.
>be guy who made xeno-civ>see this guy be a dick to everyone>find it sad and amusing>sure sucks to be slaves now, huh?
Rolled 50 (1d100)since, a bunch of others are keeping their names from Civ thing, I might as well keep mine as well even though I wasn't going to>>601224design traps to be snek themed
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>601224you are inspired to develop many traps involving actual snakes
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>601224> Transition to the next morning
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>601224Inspiration from the past match hits you. You design a trap in which you open a door and a bunch of beasts trample you.
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>601230Go to sleep once you're done.
>>601230Yes, perfect, you drew out plans for traps involving snakes using your Collector's Edition Phoenix Quill, made from the actual ass feathers of an actual phoenix
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>601241>>601235I'm leaving for a while. Work hard and pay those bills.
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>601241Now go to sleep and dream of traps
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>601241I'm starting to see why we're poor as fuck. Stop buying limited shit you gobbo
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601241>Snake based traps: Constrictors or the venomous types?
>>601244And so you went to sleep. In your Limited Edition Ent Bed. Made from ents captured from the elven forest.
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>601259Hey, an actual wise purchase. Dream a prophetic dream
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>601259god damn the manlets really betrayed the other races didn't they, all other ones got shit on after they lost while manlets are living the high lifealso punch ent in face
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>601285>Scene: Transition
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>601259wake up in a middle of the night to scout arena
>>601271no they didn't. Plus they're already getting Nam Flashbacks everytime they see Orcs because of the overwhelming guilt (Well, Gob II is).
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>601282WAKEUPYOUR PEOPLE NEED YOU
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>601282>No DragonsJews BTFO.Well at least this establishes all races will eventually get back together sans Dragons.Wake up in cold sweat
>>601282Watch the fight, the king isn't minding us for the moment
>>601284"Aight bye. P.S: barbarians sux"
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>601289>>601282fuck I give up I really need sleep
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>601294you are just biased fuckKing is barbarian in disguise
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>601294>That dream person's mustache is glorious>Take it, claim it as your own
>>601299Oh no, the stache is gone
>>601294Wake up in cold sweat.
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>601302>W-Woah, is that what our hands look like?>Hands are crazy man
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601302THIS WAS ALL A DREAMYOU ACTUALLY WORK IN CAVESWITHOUT ANY HOME WITHOUT ANY LE STUFF
>>601309WAKE UP NEO
>>601309>LE STUFF barbarians confirmed for reddit
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>601311that's Limited Edition acronym you savage
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601311>This is getting out of hand>Goblin guy: Wake up
>>601312>i-it was an acronymyeah sure m8
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>601317your dreams suck balls, manlet
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601317barbs plan to escape slavery in their upboats
>>601319Not as much as barbarians, lmao
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>601317> Meta: Meta: Meta: Commence
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>601323I bet you can't even throw imaginary rocks, not talking about real ones
>>601323Barbs confirmed for being gayer than us
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>601323news comes that the skeleton dance troupe was murdered by paladins
>>601327>m-muh rockslmao classic barbarian deflection tacticalways falling back to rockskeep being delusional lol
>>600481Woo looks like I'm earlyTime to readOP post twitter updates ya dingus
>>601337wake up to >>601329
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>601337>can't even throw imaginary rockWUSS
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>601341>>601337forgot roll
>>601340But I did post the update ya mong
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>601337Wake up in cold sweat. Then get confused about the last part of your dream
>>601345why you are killing fellow skellies
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>601343I can throw rocks better than you, nigga
>>601337So...Is this thing we're doing here an intermission or some kind of awful fever dream?
>>601345"HEAR YE! HEAR YE! ANOTHER BAND OF BARBARIAN SKELETONS WERE FOUND AND PURGED LAST NIGHT BY THE PALADINS. THEY SEEMED TO BE SOME SORT OF NECRO DANCE TROUPE. REJOICE CITIZENS! THE STREETS ARE GETTING SAFER!" cried the town crier
>>601352because the chances of any race other than maybe manlet ending without dieing is next to none, so I might as well end their suffering as quickly as possibleI already made the dragons massively suicidal last thread
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>601368remember the times when necrodance touched your soulplan on revenge
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>601368You go for a walk outside to clear your head of thoughts of Barbarian and Faggots
>>601368> Oh my go0dness, that man's teeth are impeccable>Make him reveal the secret of perfect dentistry to us
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>601381
>>601379Ah yes, a morning walk before work
>>601384>Work: Premature commencement
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>601384"WAKE UP, LEO"you start hearing voices again"THIS WORLD IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK"
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>601384Punch self out of overwhelming guiltMake this a routine
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>601388Fuck me and the horse I rode in on...
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>601384drop by the local mansion and smugly smirk at the house slave elves through the window
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>601384Go investigate the strange disappearances in chinatown
What are the Elves doing now? Do they have weed to smoke? Are they farmers?
>>601377I am just being logical, no use trying when most the races are just going to end poorly anyway, so I might as well take away their good shit so that people don't get their hopes up and think they stand a chance when we inevitably fail
>>601391Squish>>601400Some work in the fields, some work in houses.
>>601400They probably grow it secretly somewhere, like hidden inside of trees and stuff.
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601408okay now do this >>601394
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>601408This place is so happy - it's creepy
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>601408go to scene of skelly carnage and search for survivors
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>601408WAKE UP GOBBOTHIS WORLD IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMSITS A DREAM WITHIN A DREAMTHERES NOT ENOUGH SALT FROM MANLET PLAYERS
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>601408Masterbate furiously and jizz over the place for no raisin
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>601425you meet a mysterious man in sunglasses
>>601425Let's stop by some rich houses and wave smugly at the elves inside.
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>601425Find the glitch in the matrix>inb4 its under the trap door
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>601430
>>601429Crashing this happy tale with no survivors huh
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>601425Go to work
>>601429"Hello I am mysterious man in sunglasses. But also incredibly trustworthy, do not be alarmed"
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>601444He's tall, don't trust him. Punch his nards
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>601444Take off your hood first
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>601444See what kind of coloured pills he's offering
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>601444he offers you to learn the truth behind Kingdom and king literal invincibility.cause you are chosen one.
>>601444Buy recreational drugs from the mysterious man
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601444he reveals the horrifying truth
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>601453I want some of that 420
>>601454SHIT. It's another u r faget note
>>601454"You see...racecar is racecar backwards"
>>601454rip kobs took the red pill
>>601436you don't want manlets to be happy either, do you?
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>601465What drugs you got senpai?
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>601465report him to the nearest guard
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>601465pull his cloak.He's actually 3 gobbos standing on each other
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>601465that's a magic password which breaks illusions around youYOU ACTUALLY NEVER HAD ANY LIMITED EDITION GOODS, THEY WERE REGULAR
>>601473Key words: NO SURVIVORS
>>601476"Take the green pill, and I show you where the rabbit hole goes, take the purple pill and you return to your normal everyday life, none the wiser"
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>601465Rip off his mask
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601492GREEN LOCK IN CONFIRM
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>601492>>601477
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>601492Green pill and get our hair back
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>601492>>601478
>>601496SHIT WE DEEP IN THE RABBIT HOLE NOW
>>601501>>601498Resistance is futile its too lateThere is no going back
>>601496"Very well....the rabbit hole goes there"Ba dum tish
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>601509It was all a very realistic dream
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>601509That actually was DickAss thief and he robbed all our stuff
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>601509>>601477he is obviously a crazy person and should be detained
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>601509okay, well, can we have the purple pill, too, then?
>>601513"YOu know what else is realistic?...The graphics in this new adventuring book, available now for pre-order at the cheap cheap price of 60 gold coins"
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>601526go down rabbit hole instead
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>601526GUARDS! THIS MAN IS INSANE AND A CONSMAN
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>601526>>601477report crazy, possibly jewish merchant
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>601526Check the back of the book for any secret messages to know the dark truth like actually going down the rabbit hole
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>601526Report shifty dude of draconic descent
>>601531Todd of the Howard Clan strikes again
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>601538Go down the rabbit hole and see if we learn any dark hidden secrets about our reality
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>601538meanwhile green drug starts workingyou see numbers everywhere
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>601538Shit you're late for work
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>601538Damn Thaddeus of the Howard clan, always trying to sell those adventure books. We all know they will poison your mind and make you pray Dice god.
>>601541The numbers! What do they mean?!
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>601548Realise were late to work and may get fired
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>601548QUICKGO DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601548turns out the 'drug' was literally poisonusually not enough to kill a human but you are small
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>601548DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>601548No time to wonder what the numbers mean, we got to get to work!
>>601552Oh no! If someone don't help you soon you'll die to death!
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601564Turns out everyone is racist against gobbos
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>601564like usual tall people are assholes
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>601564nah, you are still alivejustDIFFERENT type of aliveMini skellebro is what you are
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>601564Turns out hair is the only antidote for the poison. You eat your crown-shaped hair.
>>601564>xenomorph comes from the sky to save gobo
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>601573wow fucked up that dice roll
>>601570It is a comforting though to think that you'll just revive into a skeleton when you die.But it is merely a thought, Kingdom Court Wizards already took away all tribal magic.
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>601580FIGHT WITH POISON WITH YOUR GUTS
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>601580>>601572
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>601580people gather to laugh at you
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601580The poison was never real, we're just having a really bad trip.
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>601580The poison dosen't affect you! YOU'RE SMALL, THAT MEANS YOU HAVE SMALL GUTS! THERE IS NOTHING TO POISON!
>>601582>POISON>GUTSMan this pill is making you see weird shit
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>601603a kobold comes to kick you while you die
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>601603AWAKEN YOUR FORGOTTEN WEABOO POWERSREMEMBER WHO YOU AREWAKE UP
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>601603Our poisoned body is kidnapped by street hobos
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>601603Rediscover weebhood
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>601603>>601586
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>601609>>601624
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>601624>>601606YOU CAN DO ITREBORN
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>601624Recover just perfectly due to the kickAlthough the hallucinations stay
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>601624Crawl down the rabbit hole
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601624curse his entire species with asses more abused than the dragons with your last breath
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>601624>>601631YOU ALREADY HAVE THE HAIR, NOW YOU ONLY NEED THE HEART
>>601632Amazingly, the kick caused you to puke out the poison before it could kill you.But not before it caused you to hallucinate for the rest of the day.
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>601637the poison still has left you permamantally weaker than a manlet baby
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>601637call in sick for a daybut this traumatic experience make you remember who you truly areyou are no engineer, or mechanicyou are proud weaboo, huge fan of WanPan
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>601637Our jobs fires us since we didn't show up and now were broke
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>601637Future-you and Chef Arthas driving an open roof car, come through a portal, leaving burning scorch marks behind them."Glad we could make it. There's no time to explain, get the fuck in".
>rng wants to kill manletswhat doesn't kill you - make you stronger >>601640
>>601647Crawl down the rabbit hole like a baby
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>601647nah, you actually grow strongerand tallergo down that rabbit hole already
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>601647cry in a corner
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>601647>>601648
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>601647It also made us retarded
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>601661"MAN THE FUCK UP YA WUSS" you hear all way from arena
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>601661Retreat to the nearest gutter to wallow in our sadness
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>601661Curse the world in a far eastern oriental language of weird squiggly moon runes like in those animu you used to watch
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>601661random passing paladin thinks you are possessed by a demon, and decides to purge it
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>601661Get a grip
that rabbit hole is probably fake and the REAL one is under the trap door
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>601678REMEMBER HOTBLOODED SHONEN ANIME AND MAN THE FUCK UP
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>601678You meet a certain depresed elf that walks funny because his anus got permanently disfigured with the ancient dildo
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>601678Get a grip already
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>601678Realise were turning into a pile of goo
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601678start slicing your wrists open due to how sad you are getting
>>601684"Oh hey, you like to wallow in the gutter too huh"
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>601693remember happy times together
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>601693He spouts some random shit about telling you to wake up and hands you a red pill but your too high to listen and resist it being forcefully shoved down your throatAll this happens while hearing the barbarian's chanting from the arena calling you a wuss
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>601693Cry together as one and contemplate life with him
>>601697Ah yes, back when you still lived in caves
What the blueberry fuckmuffins is this
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>601706>>601699
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>601706Punch yourself in the face in order to regain your strength and go fucking work
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>601706Well I mean it's not all bad.We're being paid now instead of having to pay the dragons.
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>601706realize that you still live in cave and everything was a lieEVERYTHINGWhy do you think you can hear barbarians always? BECAUSE YOU LOCATED UNDER THEIR CELLSIN MINESWORKING DIRTY JOB FOR NO WAGE AND JUST FOODPROVIDING SERVICES TO TALL FAGGOTS
>>601712Systematic sabotaging of manlets by other tribes
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>601706now combine your sorrow and become more powerful than you could ever imagine
>>601722Why am I not surprised. Why am I even less surprised by the dragons only showing up now to fuck with us.
>>601718Well that was weird, let's get to work
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>601732Ask the guards if you can net some extra cash by working overtime.
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>601732Drop by the arena
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>601732yeah. to workIN THE CAVESYOU ARE PLUNGER, PUSHING SHIT OF TALL FAGGOTS THRU THE TUBESTHAT'S THE REALITY
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>601732Clock in
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>601732Realise the work day is already over since you fucked around too much
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>601732oh look, the cutest guard is working today, too
>>601738"Alright, Gob II....Running a bit late today, aren't we"
Rolled 30 (1d100)Should we even consider breaking the manlets out now?I mean they're pretty well set.They're actual citizens instead of slaves.They have well paying jobs and can buy land.And they aren't tortured every other hour>>601747I blame Todd of the Howard clan
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>601747Be a tree to avoid punishment
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>601747you start seeing things which should be thereweaboo things
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>601747>>601745
>>601750I'm convinced it's all is a lie, it's all way too good to be true
>>601750>implying this is not a dream. were jumping down the rabbit hole under that trap door
>>601752YOu did your best tree impression. The guard just tells you to stop goofing around and get to work>>601757What, can't manlets have something nice and not be in some sort of a dream?
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601762reroll on this >>601753>What, can't manlets have something nice and not be in some sort of a dream?Yes
>>601762You can't work for you are a tree. Trees don't work
>>601762>What, can't manlets have something nice and not be in some sort of a dream?I know who I'm questin with
>>601764Who put this here
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>601768grow mohawk
>>601768Invest in this masterpiece
>>601774Rng dictates that its time to leave the dream
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>601774Two nat 100s in a row, goddamn.>>601779Work.We gotta get the money for watching fights.
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>601779start seeing more weaboo thingsand orcs which look very real
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>601779Wake up from the dream and get back to real life.The mines with horrible working conditions under the barb cells being fed by how much you work
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>601779work
>>601786"That thing you really like will never be localized. And if it is, it'll be a shitty censored dub"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>601796WorkWe must not be compromised by orc hallucinations
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>601796work and chat up your workmate
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>601796MORE ORC WEABOO VISIONS MOOOOOOOOOOREREMEMBER
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>601796Dragonzilla attacks the city
>>601796Regrow Crown Hair. Eat bagel that one Gobbo always has for you. what happened to the imps? They get axed?
>>601803"also your waifu a shit"
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>601796Gee I hope our work isn't influenced by these weeaboo hallucinations
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>601815Forgot roll
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>601816HENSHIN INTO MASKED MANLET
>>601816Wake the fuck up and work overtime
>>601815They work desk jobs and in libraries.Their wings help carrying paperwork to high places easier
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>601816>>601798
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>601816work then something happens
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>601816Transform into a mahou shoujo
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>601820
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>601821Regrow Crown Hair. Eat one of those cooked cheese bagels that one Imp brings for everyone.
anime y prehistoria
shit wrong thread
>>601819MEANWHILE, "Sir, I think there's something wrong with him"
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>601842Mahou shoujo orc tells you to wake up
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>601842Henshin actually worksYou was a Space Sheriff Manlet all along
>>601842Faint from shock of everything. Also realize that you can fly! Just like the dragons daddy told you about!
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>601842The guards notice you've been poisoned and take you to the infirmary. Thankfully your healthcare services cover this so you still get paid.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>601842Work damn itYou can save your transformation for when you're home
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>601842"he is becoming too awesome"
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>601225Oh hey, guy. Sup?>>601368Awe... what?>>601345Oh... YOU!The guy who wanted us all to be skellies is now killing skellies? Fuck you.>>601842There is something wrong with all of us. Like why we let you savages in here?
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>601842piss test
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>601849I am shit at remembering to roll
>>601848He's a space cowboy
>>601853"STOP INTERFERING WITH HOT BLOOD HEART OF THIS FELLOW YA WUSS"random anon hears from afar
>>601859no no, he needs a ride and team for being Space CowboySpace Sheriffs work alone
>>601853"You're in no condition to work. I'm bringing you to a healer"
>>601866"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU UGLY SHIT" he hears right after.
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>601873Run away yelling about space sheriffs and anime
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>601873Guard notices that the other workers entertained by your shenanigans. Productivity soars. Get promotion: full time factory entertainer.
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>601873OTOKO NA N' DAROUUUU?GUZUGUZU SURU NA YOOOOOO
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>601873The spirit of the dance troupe overtakes prince gobbo!
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>601873faint in guards arms. Dream of cheese and imps.
>>601876"Hmmm"You were then promoted to Factory Jester
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>601892>>601882
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>601892>>601851You get paid according to your new, superior, work position
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>601892but actually you are THE Defender of JusticeFighting crimes and helping your fellow savages and especially orcs
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>601892KAN-PAI
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>601892>>601896
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>601892I will roll again then ;-;this is my choice>>601889
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>601892Due to our new position we let out some phat beats that get the other manlets pumped up
You know. I am not even salty. I am just sad by how futile everything in this adventure is.Sneks, ents, dance troupe, Wanpanch being weak as shit...sigh
OP is having connection errors.
>>601899"I AM THE DEFENDER OF JUSTICE! FIGHTING CRIMES IS MY MISSION, HELPING MY FELLOW SAVAGES ESPECIALLY ORCS IS MY DUTY! EVIL! BEWARE!" you yelledThe other manlets are amused
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>601908>>601896
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>601916God is amused too and actually gives you super powers and ability to transform into Manlet Rider
>>601923meant for >>601916
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>601916Factory manager notices the genius in your brand of comedy and thinks he can use you to invite the King to the factory for a show and impress him.
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>601916>>601924I gotta reroll for that
>>601927MEANWHILE, UP ON THE MANAGER OFFICE"Hey, guard, what's happening down there?""That's our new Factory Jester sir. He suddenly kept yelling about being a defender of justice and whatnot while jumping around doing weird poses. The others workers apprently loves it so it increased morale and productivity""Hmmmmm....yes, yes, that's perfect!""wut""We'll invite the King down to our humble factory! When he sees the genius in this type of comedic morale boost, he'll surely give us more funding!"
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>601933The manager's plan fails. Miserably.
>>601933MEANWHILE IN THE SECRET BASE OF MANLET RIDERYou actually discover super abilities.THAT GREEN PILL DID SOMETHING TO YOUR BODYYOU ARE STRONG AS 100 ORCS, but it only works when you wear mask