You are Alice, the brutish but ultimately caring princess of a fallen kingdom overthrown by the Ignian Empire. After fleeing across the sea and arriving in a new land with all sorts of terrible people, and after being tricked out of nearly all your possessions by a man who swore he knew a guy, you decided to become an adventurer to rebuild you kingdom. You met Donovan, a swordsman who's only pathetic most of the time, and defeated a band of orcs. You then traveled to a distant village terrorized by a blighted curse, and also met a tiny Wood Elf boy named Gilbert. After Gilbert destroyed his own home to avoid leaving a paper trail, he joined you and helped you defeat the ancient Forest Spirit that had blessed the entire forest, but neglected the town because they refused to offer it any tribute. Once the blessing was lifted and most of the forest was ravaged by pestilence and angry chipmunks, the town celebrated you. That is, until a goblin warband came to deliver a knockout blow to the town. With your companions and the townsfolk, you drove off the goblins by introducing them to Representative Democracy. You then fought and killed their leader (although to be fair he mostly killed himself) and took his head.After passing out from exhaustion, you had a vision of God who told you to go get a crown from a ruined castle, and barring anything better to do you agreed. You then set off to find this castle with Donovan, Gilbert, and Gilbert's goat. After arriving at the castle, you were rudely assaulted by undead soldiers who don't understand what personal space is, and fled into the castle. inside, you met a nice man made out of stone.>cont
>>4314203The stone man tells you his name is Andromeda, but you get bored halfway in and you really need to pee so you settle for Andy so that anyone who might have to write a lot about this stone man can spare themselves a little wrist strain.Andy asks why you've come, and you tell him that your ultimate goal is the Diadem of the Dragon Knights. You admit you're not sure where it is, what it looks like, what it does, or why anyone would need it, but you didn't get this far in life by knowing what was going on. Andy respects this dim-witted commitment to follow through on life threatening promises, and joins you in your search."If I remember correctly, and mind you it has been a few hundred years, the Diadem should still be in the treasure vault. I can take you there but be warned! There's a lot of stairs."You, Donovan, Gilbert, and the goat follow Andy out of the troops' quarters, back up to the ground floor, and then through a series of twisting corridors. Andy informs you that the halls here were built to confuse invaders, but mostly they just confused the residents. After some time, he brings you to a great iron door with hundreds of tiny but elegantly carved runes cut into every inch of the metal."Here it is. Unfortunately we'll need the password. They changed it every three months, but it's been so long we'll need administrator privileges to reset it," says Andy. "We can try the Lord's Chambers, assuming he died there and we can do a little grave robbing. I'm not sure where else he might have fallen."A) Search the Lord's Chambers for a LordB) Search the battlements, as he likely fell in defense of the castleC) Search where the women and children were kept, in case the Lord was a huge bitchD) Other
>>4314229>C) Search where the women and children were kept, in case the Lord was a huge bitch
>>4314229>A) Search the Lord's Chambers for a Lord
>>4314259You ask Andy to lead you to wherever the feeble or meek would be kept, on the likely chance the Lord of this castle was a big wuss who didn't want to get killed in battle like a cool person would do. Andy nods as best as a man made of stone can, and takes you back through the castle.Near the kitchens, and behind a secret door that Andy forgot how to open and so just punched a hole in the all instead, you find a large chamber packed full of dead. The bodies, much like the ones outside, have long since been broken down by carrion eaters and other grotesque things, leaving only bones. You see women, children, the crooked backs of the elderly, and others. Even a cursory glance can tell you they died suddenly, and you suspect powerful magic at play. There are no signs of starvation or even attempts to leave the room, and there are no signs of conflict within either. Whatever killed these people didn't mean for them to suffer. You look over and see that while Donovan seems to have found his grit, Gilbert is quite horrified by this scene. He looks paler than normal, and holds his stomach as if it pains him.A) "Straighten up. You'll see worse than this."B) "You can wait in the hall if it's too hard for you, Gil."C) "Get it together! I didn't bring you on a field trip!"D) Other
>>4314323>A) "Straighten up. You'll see worse than this."
>>4314327>>4314371You tell Gilbert to steel himself, as you have no doubt things will get worse from here. It's obvious he never expected things to be even this ugly, but after a few deep breaths he seems to harden up.The four of you explore the room, turning over corpses and trying to find any that might have been the lord of this castle. Sure enough, one of them is wearing fine clothing and jewelry. You and Donovan pat it down, and find several valuables, but more importantly you find a bit of rolled parchment with notes scrawled into it. One of them is a seemingly random chain of numbers, letters, and punctuation marks. Andy says this must be the admin password, used to reset other passwords in case of emergency. You pocket it.Looking over the remaining corpses, you realize many of them have finery. And it's not as though they'll need it...A) Take whatever valuables you can findB) Leave the room, let the dead have their dignityC) Say a prayer for the deadD) Other
>>4314402>A) Take whatever valuables you can find
>>4314406>>4314430You tell the others to go over the crowd once and pocket anything shiny or just cool looking. Donovan shrugs, but Gilbert seems reluctant. Your honor decreases by -10! But you have some cool stuff now!After your bags are filled with trinkets, Andy takes you back to the iron door. When you arrive, you approach it and begin reading from the parchment. Runes upon the door start to glow a bright blue, and a voice rings out, echoing off of the walls."Entering administrator mode. Please choose a password. Remember to avoid using birthdays, street names, or other easily obtainable personal information. As a safety measure by my creators, your password cannot be a Word of Power that causes a chain death spell to go off. Not again."Roll 1d100 to decide the admin password for the vault. This will have consequences later!
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4314452Marmelo
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4314452>"password"
>>4314471what a waste of roll my dude
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4314452Donovan_is_a_good_lover
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4314493Support
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4314452Ignia rulez forever
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4314493Backing up with a roll
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>4314452Ignia will rise again
>>4314471The door seems to accept this new password, and after a series of sounds like grinding metal and stone, the door begins to swing open slowly. Dust is kicked up as the door slides along the ground, and after a few moments there is a gap large enough to walk through. The four of you proceed to the vault.Beyond the door is a great chamber with a high ceiling. The walls are drab stone, but all around you are piles of riches. Gold, silver, electrum, and even cut gems set in ornate pieces crafted by skilled smiths are strewn around you. Donovan spares no time decking each of his fingers in rings set with various stones and pearls. Gilbert kicks over a solid gold chaffing dish and finds a solid gold roast duck inside. Andy seems disinterested in the treasure, but watches you curiously.A) Stuff your bagsB) Ignore the small stuff, find the DiademC) Other
>>4314547>stuff your bags while looking for the Diadem
>>4314547>B) Ignore the small stuff, find the Diadem
>>4314562>>4314554>>4314552You flip your hair over your shoulder. When you were still in power, such baubles were as impressive as a dog licking its own balls. The greed of commoners is amusing, but you have bigger fish to fuck.You and Andy turn over most of the room looking for the Diadem. You're certain it will be round, but other than that all bets are off. Eventually, you do come across a few examples of circular objects that might go on one's head, but the issue then becomes which it could be?The first is heavy and has intricate, wreathing coils of gold that each end in a blooming rose.The second is simple, and has runes cut into it that form something of a mural. It's somewhat warm to the touch.The third is little more than a gold ring with a blue gem at its front and center. It is light, and when you listen closely it almost seems to hum.Any of these is valuable, and any might be magical, but which is the true Diadem?A) The heavy crownB) The runic crownC) The humble crown
>>4314581>C) The humble crownClassic trick
>>4314581>C) The humble crown
>>4314581>the runic crown
>>4314581>C) The humble crowneven if this isn't the diadem we can still try out the other ones and we might as well take them all
>>4314581>B) The runic crown
are the previous threads not archived?
>>4314584>>4314585>>4314590>>4314599You select the humble looking crown and carefully place it on your head. You aren't sure exactly what will happen when you do, but seeing as God told you to find this thing you suppose it will probably be super cool.As the crown rests on your brow, you do feel something. You feel a tightening as it constricts and begins to squeeze like a vice upon your head. The pain starts negligible but by the time you can no longer tolerate it the crown has fastened too tight to remove it. You call for help, and Donovan and Gilbert come running. When they see you, they rush over and attempt to remove the crown. Even their combined strength has no effect. You hear Andy begin to laugh."Mortals always seem to think they're so clever. They think they know the twists and turns of every plot. You don't know how many people I've seen pick that crown! But to be fair, I've also seen a few call the bluff and put the other two on. But it doesn't matter. All three were cursed, you simply choose the slow and excruciating fate."It becomes clear even through the pain of your skull being squeezed that this was Andy's scheme all along. Why he plotted against you is unclear, but there is no way he plans to stop this short of killing you.A) Tell the others to bring Andy down, it might break the curseB) Fight Andy together, despite the intense painC) Beg Andy to release the curseD) Threaten Andy that you will kill him if he does not lift the curseE) Other
>>4314606I have tried finding the first thread on suptg but I was unable to find it
>>4314606I don't know how to archive a thread, so if nobody else did I wouldn't know. The second one is still on the board, I think
>>4314611>B) Fight Andy together, despite the intense painNever trust a rock
>>4314611>B) Fight Andy together, despite the intense pain
>>4314615oh fuck can anybody PLEASE archive the old thread, I don't want one of the best quests on /qst/ to be forgotten to time
>>4314611>E) Other>Ask him why he let us be cursed There must be a reason
>>4314616>>4314619>>4314630You stop tugging at the crown and reach for your sword. Adrenaline starts to pump through your body, dulling the pain of the cursed crown just slightly. Donovan does the same, and Gilbert takes a few steps back before producing his wand. Andy shrugs, and bangs one massive stone fist into the palm of the other."Typical. All you meat creatures can do is thrash when cornered. I will grant you a nobler death than my people were allowed, then."Andy brings a great stone fist in an arcing swing down upon you. You and Donovan both roll in opposite directions, tucking and landing gracefully on your knees ready to spring up. Andy's movements are slow, but even one blow from a swing like that could end you before the crown gets a chance.A) Flank him with DonovanB) Tell Gilbert to use a spellC) Have Donovan distract him while you look for a weak pointD) Other
ok I have kinda figured out how to archive it, but what is a good description for thread 2?
>>4314651>try and stab him in the glowing red gem
>>4314661+1Place your bets he lied about his weak point
I have archived thread 2 It was really easy
>>4314661>>4314663>>4314670>>4314676You lock your eyes onto the red gem embedded deep in Andy's chest. He follows your gaze, and seems to grow less amused. Suddenly, he begins to charge at you, roaring as if to frighten you into being stunned. Unfortunately for him, after seeing the irredeemable penis of a Hobgoblin Chief, there's nothing short of the Daemon Prince of Disease that could shock you anymore. You level your sword and counter charge.The two of you meet and Andy tries to wrap you in his massive fist. You leap, landing on his arm, and drive the tip of your sword into the gem. It collides, the gem cracks, and your blade pushes deeper. Soon half of the blade is plunged into Andy's torso, and you look up at his face. His expression is contorted in pain and fear in equal measure. You realize he truly never considered this course of events. You think it's a little funny.Suddenly there is a burst of magical energy and you are thrown back several meters into a pile of soft, comfy gold coins that only slightly destroy your spine. When you come to, you see Andy has slumped down onto his knees, immobile. You also see that your Heirloom sword has been utterly destroyed.You have lost your family's ancient sword, passed down for centuries! Good going!Gilbert helps you to your feet, and as he does you realize the crown on your head has ceased constricting. You easily remove it and toss it aside. The three of you approach Andy, and confirm he no longer dwells on this plane of reality. Wherever a golem goes when they die, he's there now.A) Say a prayerB) Curse his soulC) Dig out the gemD) Other
>>4314714>C) Dig out the gemcash cash money
>>4314714>B) Curse his soul>C) Dig out the gem
>>4314714>C) Dig out the gem
>>4314717>>4314719>>4314720>>4314729You reach your hand into Andy's chest, spitting a curse as you scrape every bit of shattered gem out of his chest. The pieces will no longer be able to channel or hold magical energy, but they are still fine and might be recut by a jeweler. As you finish, you notice something deeper inside Andy's body. Your sword went quite deep, so there must be some sort of cavity within him, but why? You hand is too big to fit properly, but Gilbert might try. Alternatively, you can call well enough alone and just continue searching. You feel like messing with this too much might bring awful luck.A) Tell Gilbert to stick his arm into the mysterious body cavityB) Leave it aloneC) Use Donovan's sword to feel around, risking damage to anything insideD) Other
>>4314742>A) Tell Gilbert to stick his arm into the mysterious body cavity
>>4314612https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4262875 Is this the first thread?
>>4314742>B) Leave it alone
>>4314748oh shit it is, I didn't know there were other archive places, although I still like suptg more
>>4314751>>4314761>>4314765You decide not to bother with this stone man's corpse any more. Gilbert seems relieved by this. The three of you continue looking for the Diadem in silence.Some time later, your back begins to grow sore from bending and digging, and Gilbert proposes you all break for lunch. He sets out a blanket and begins to unpack a basket of food including a six foot sandwich, a thermos of soup, some fresh water, and a cheesecake. Where he kept any of this and how it stayed good during the trip you have no clue. Frankly it disturbs you. But Donovan seems eager to dig into that sandwich.A) RestB) Keep lookingC) Other
>>4314828>A) RestAak how old it its
>>4314834>>4314840>>4314843>>4314853You decide to sit with the others and have a rest. The sandwich is dry but the soup is refreshing. As Gilbert begins slicing the cheesecake your mind wanders. The three crowns you found here were cursed, or so said Andy. It's unclear whether the curses will still activate if you try to don the crowns now, and without Andy there's no way to release them, so it's probably best to leave them here for now. But if the Diadem you're looking for isn't one of those three, then where is it? You begin gazing around the room for any sign of it, and eventually your eyes wander up the walls to the ceiling. High above you there is a mural painted in depiction of many scenes from myth. There are battles, meetings of heroes and gods, and all manner of divine interventions. Near the center of them all is depicted Sol, a greater god of Humanity. The Ignian people worship Sol chiefly among gods, but in your experience Saphirrans seem less devout. That said, it's a bit odd to see Sol depicted on such an old mural, so far from Igni. Then something else catches your eyes. Above Sol's head is a halo of gold that represents the sun. But as you look more closely, you can see it isn't paint, but gold embedded into the ceiling. Could the Diadem perhaps be hidden so well?You consult Gilbert and Donovan. If you plan to reach that high without learning to fly, you'll need a ladder. Donovan suggests piling gold and whatever you can find in here until it's high enough. A crude plan that will take hours. Gilbert offer another solution."I've practiced wind magic before, I might be able to boost you up there! Of course I never got the hand of controlling wind, just summoning huge gusts of it. But how hard can it be, right?" A) Gold pilingB) Dangerous magicC) Throw things at itD) Other
>>4314889>B) Dangerous magic
>>4314889>A) Gold piling
>>4314889>C) Throw things at it
>>4314920>>4314923>>4314969The three of you, and the goat, begin hauling mounds and mounds of gold a treasure to form a precarious pile that will certainly break the neck of whoever falls off first. It takes so long you have to sleep just to avoid passing out in the middle of it all. Finally, you finish and look up at the horrible mess you've made in the center of the room. There's so much visible floor now you can see just how stained and gross the carpet really is.You decide the pile is high enough and its time to ascend. However when you look at your comrades, they seem less than eager."I don't know... It's pretty steep," says Gilbert."You'd definitely crack your skull open," says Donovan."Baaaah," says the goat.A) Climb upB) Send GilbertC) Send DonovanD) Send the goat
>>4314990>D) Send the goat
>>4314990>send the goatactually kind of brilliant
Sorry ya'll gonna have to pause for the night, but things will start up again tomorrow!Thanks to the people who joined in and tanks to the lurkers! I appreciate you even if you didn't vote!
>>4315001>>4315006>>4315020>>4315027>>4315235You look again at the others and see they are well and truly too cowardly to climb a death trap, and it makes you too embarrassed to bare. You of course are above climbing such mundane obstacles as this, and therefore cannot go. Instead, you point a gloves finger at Gilbert's goat and order it to climb. Gilbert gives you a puzzled look."Listen I know she's a smart enough goat but she's just a goat. It's not as if she understands what's going on, or what we're saying. Maybe let's just take a step back and rethink this," Gilbert says, holding his hands up as if to calm you down. "Goat's got it," says Donovan, pointing up at the beast which has not only expertly climbed to the top of the gold pile but has also apparently pried the gold ring free of the ceiling with a horn and now absentmindedly bleats as it attempts to chew on it. You order the goat to come back down with the crown.A moment later the goat is back on solid ground and you snatch the gold ring from its mouth. It does indeed appear to be a circlet, or something like it. There are faint runes etched into the gold band, but they are so delicate that from afar they look to be nothing more than a lovely pattern. There is also radiant diamond set at the front. And it's absolutely covered in goat saliva.You wipe the crown off and take a long look at it. If this is the crown you came for, then your quest is nearly complete. But what to do now?A) Wear the crownB) Bring the crown to a church as an offeringC) Sell the crownD) Use the crown to play ultimate frisbeeE) Other
>>4315936>A) Wear the crown
>>4315936>A) Wear the crownwe are a princess therefore we deserve a crown to show that we ain't no peasant
>>4315936>C) Sell the crown
>>4315964>>4315944>>4315939You decide that even though the first crown you put on today was very cursed, the odds of it happening twice are probably really slim. Like getting hit by lightning. And therefore not putting on the crown would be foolish.You raise the circlet above your head nervously. Donovan and Gilbert are visibly tense, but the goat seems rather calm. As you lower the circlet, you close your eyes and feel your heartbeat rising. Slowly the circlet comes to rest on your head. When at last you release your hold on it, you are pleased to feel no vice like squeezing. You don't catch on fire or turn into a blueberry or anything like that!Your mind becomes filled with a thunderous beating of great wings. Your memories are augmented with the hazy image of knights in resplendent armor, and mounted on no less than true dragons. No drakes as the men of the Great Swamp ride, nor Wyverns such as Orcs have tamed in the calderas far west of here. True and noble dragons. Your mind comes to a wheel of four segments, each made from glass imbued with mystical properties. As the wheel turns, you feel your body fill with immense power. Put that power has no channel, and no form. The wheel must cease turning, but where will it rest?A) Red, volcanic glassB) Blue, lapiz lazuliC) White, frosted glassD) Black, obsidian
>>4316001>C) White, frosted glass
>>4316002>>4316003You watch as the wheel slows, and finally ceases its rotation, coming to rest on the pane of white glass. When your vision clears, you see your companions again, and an icy cold sensation runs down your body like drops of rain. The drops roll down from your head, along your back, down your legs and finally to your feet where the sensation dies. You feel empowered now, but the true extent of this power is yet to be seen.You have obtained the Diadem of the Dragon Knights: Aspect of Fimbulvetr!You have acquired the ability Breath of Winter!You have acquired the ability Call Storm: Ice!The Diadem rest comfortably on your head now. You might test out its power, but perhaps it would be more prudent to wait for a more pressing time.A) Try the crown now! Magic is real! Fuck the code!B) Practice temperanceC) Other
>>4316059>B) Practice temperance
>>4316068>>4316074You resist the urge to do something like freezing Donovan's dick or making a sentient snowman with an ear rending vibrato. Instead you tell the others it's time to make your way out. The four of you leave the treasure room, and the great iron door seals itself as you exit. You would most likely be able to reenter if you so wished, but for now you grow weary of this cursed castle. You pass back through the halls and corridors, only get lost a handful of times before you reach the entryway once more. Beyond the great gates, beyond the rubble of the parapets which blocks entry into the castle now, you still hear the scraping and rattling of the dead soldiers, risen to defend their home. There is little to prevent you from climbing the rubble on this side, and the four of you make your way up to survey your only exit.Thousands of undead swarm the gates, each in armor weathered by the ages and wielding rusted but still deadly weapons. They are slow and brittle but the sheer quantity would overwhelm you quickly.A) Use the crownB) Make a break for it before they notice youC) Stay in the castle and have a sleepoverD) Other
>>4316089>C) Stay in the castle and have a sleepover
>>4316089C) Stay in the castle and have a sleepover
>>4316089>A) Use the crownStop right there
>>4316093>>4316100You decide that rather than brave the massive mob of undead, you should take a night to rest and think things over. What follows is a night of relaxation, smores, hair braiding, and nail painting that is underscored by the rattling and scraping of an unliving horde. By morning, the ruckus has not ceased, and your comrades are getting tired of sleeping on stone floors. You need to do something before they revolt- or worse, ask to be paid.A) Use the crownB) Charge the hordeC) Throw Gilbert to them and run for itD) Try to find a back way out, like a brave guy would toE) Other
>>4316128>D) Try to find a back way out, like a brave guy would toIf this
>>4316134Fail, it’s time to snow
>>4316128>A) Use the crownI am guessing that after we use it needs to recharge
>>4316128>A) Use the crown
>>4316140>>4316145You shrug, and decide that if you're going to wear an enchanted crown, you might as well put it to work. You climb to the top of the rubble again, and survey the scene. You're almost sure even more of the damned fallen soldiers have gathered here now. You take a deep breath and concentrate, focusing your mind and channeling magical energy into the Diadem. Then, as you feel your power spike, you release the air from your lungs and over the crowd. A frigid breeze overtakes the massed undead troops and ice begins to form on their bodies. By the time your lungs are empty, a great swath of the troops are frozen stiff, unable to move even an inch. This could be your best chance. You signal to the others and the four of you make a break for it, rrunning through the field of frozen soldiers that now serve as a sturdy buffer between you and those that are still able to move freely.You reach the other side with short breath and stiff limbs, but you are free. The four of you keep running, cresting hill after hill until you are well and truly outside of the range of those terrible creatures.You stop and lean on a tree to catch your breath. The magic of the crown is draining, and you doubt you could do more than two of three of those in a day without blacking out from the strain. Still, the power you wield now is impressive. If you weren't such a kind and pure person you might be very dangerous.Gilbert hands you a waterskin to slake your thirst, and asks what you plan to do now.A) Make plans to retake the castle. Priness needs a castle.B) Head back. This land is cursed and stinkyC) Try to end the blight of this land, but leave the castle for the ratsD) Find a way to get rich with the crownE) Other
>>4316177>C) Try to end the blight of this land, but leave the castle for the rats
>>4316177>B) Head back. This land is cursed and stinky
>>4316183>>4316203You don't much care to try and rebuild a castle that is falling apart and full of rats. Not to mention the traitorous rock situation. But cleansing this place of its curse would at the very least look good on your resume. That being the case, you don't think you can do it all on your own. You consult with Donovan and Gilbert, to see what they think."Personally I say fuck this place," says Donovan. "It's dreary and damp and it deserves every fucking skeleton. That being said, if you mean to clear it out then a mercenary company would be more than happy to do it for a share of the hoard.""Just like a human to put money before duty!" responds Gilbert with disdain. "Don't let some greedy sellswords defile this place. Despite how it looks now it was a proud bastion once, built by a king to defend his people. If you want to run these undead off, you'd do better trying to deal with the land spirits. They'd do it for the honor of cleansing the earth of rot, I think.""Spirits are fickle and usually pretty big douche-bags," mumbles Donovan dismissively. Gilbert pretends to have not heard it."Baaah," bleats the goat. It seems his vote is to go out in a blaze of glory. There is wisdom in this.Ultimately however the choice is yours. How will you clear this land?A) Hire mercenariesB) Deal with the spiritsC) Run in, no plan, no thoughts, head empty, get killed, ride to valhallaD) Other
>>4316234>B) Deal with the spirits
>>4316234>A) Hire mercenariesI trust Donovan and also didn't we kill a spirit prince so the spirits may hate us
Gonna give it some more time for a tie breaker
>>4316234>A) Hire mercenaries
Rolled 1 (1d2)>>4316236>>4316277or>>4316283>>4316252
>>4316301>>4316283>>4316252You decide that as much as you'd love to have to complete a bunch of random tasks for ethereal embodiments of the wind or something, you'd rather take your chances with flesh and blood humans. You ask Donovan where you might meet with a mercenary company, and he tells you that you can send a missive from any respectable town, but the heart of commerce in the Sapphire League has always been the capitol: The Clockwork City. You've heard of this place on your travels. It's said to be a thriving if not unseemly metropolis of brass and iron, filled with industrious folk who toil overseen by several large business conglomerates. Many say their mastery of metal is awe inducing, but their spirit is one of cold calculation, with little room for human empathy. So a great place to hire killers, really.The four of you head off back to the town you rested at some nights ago to regroup and recuperate. After two nights of good rest and a little practice with the crown, you feel prepared to set off.The journey to The Clockwork City is surprisingly peaceful. The roads to and from this place are well maintained and patrolled often enough that bandits would rather not take the chance of looting caravans or travelers coming through. However things change quickly when you actually arrive at the iron gates of the city.The city walls are towering, wrought from black iron and protected by great artillery and sentinels who keep watch for monsters or solicitors. The gates are just as huge, and heavy looking to the point you think it would take a team of giants to breach them. The guards at the foot of the gates are normal sized.As you and your companions approach, they ask your business.A) "I'm here to hire a band of killers to join me on a suicide mission to lift the curse on some forgotten land far from here."B) "We're just passing through. No big deal."C) "How about my Elf friend here entertains you boys for a while and the rest of us just slip inside and nobody says anything, eh?"D) "Fuck you."E) Other
>>4316312>A) "I'm here to hire a band of killers to join me on a suicide mission to lift the curse on some forgotten land far from here."
>>4316312>C) "How about my Elf friend here entertains you boys for a while and the rest of us just slip inside and nobody says anything, eh?"Why did we got with the mercenary option if the spirits won the roll OP ?
>>4316343Last vote technically slipped in at the last second
>>4316316>>4316325>>4316326You tell the guards that you're here to hire trained killers for a suicide mission. One of them jots something down on a clipboard. The other nods, and motions to the gatekeeper to open the gate."Ah, yeah. We get that a lot here. Just be careful you don't cause any trouble. Enjoy the city!" The gates creak open just slightly, and the four of you are let in.Beyond the gate is a massive city, built from ironwood and metal, with building crammed together so tight in places that the overhangs leave almost no room for sunlight to shine through. The people are shoulder to shoulder as well, constantly bumping into one another. More than a few times as you walk through the streets do you feel a curious hand grab for your hind quarters, only to be repelled by your armored ass. Often do you think you have lost Gilbert, until you command him to hold hands with Donovan for safety. Neither of them are happy about it.Following Donovan's guidance, you arrive at a town square. It is much less crowded here, as the only businesses are ones of paper and pen, rather than the rickety stalls of thrifty merchants. The people here dress more finely too, so much that Donovan and Gilbert start to look a bit out of place. It even lacks the commoners scent of piss and shit that you're so accustomed to these days. Truly you are home.A) Get straight to the guild officeB) Take some time to wash the smell of sweat and ass from your bodyC) Other
Stopping a little early tonight. I'll keep the thread going all this week, but I might only post a few times a day. Thanks to everyone returning from the previous threads! I really appreciate you guys coming back, and I want to thank any newcomers! I know there's a lot of threads here so I'm flattered you would take part in mine!Also thanks to the lurkers, even if you don't play I'm happy just to entertain you for a while.
>>4316385>B) Take some time to wash the smell of sweat and ass from your body
>>4316385>B) Take some time to wash the smell of sweat and ass from your bodywhy do we smell like ass?
>>4316385>B) Take some time to wash the smell of sweat and ass from your body>>4316396because it sweats dude
>>4316396It's the burden of having a good one.
this is an enjoyable quest
>>4316392>>4316396>>4316412>>4316416You decide to check into a nice inn, with hot water and real soap and towels that aren't four different colors from overuse. Gilbert and Donovan seem nervous, as you have very little money left, but you didn't get this far doing the smart thing!You enter a rather glamorous establishment called the Cock of the Walk. The sign above the door displays a resplendent rooster in silk clothes, complete with cane and top hat. If a rooster that fancy would stay here, you should feel right at home.Donovan and Gilbert's jaws drop as you enter the lobby of the inn. There is a high ceiling with a crystal chandelier, light by hundreds of candles that burn so brightly you can make out everyone's faces very clearly. Normally inns are dim lit so nobody has to realize just how ugly they truly are. There is also a small koi pond in the center of the lobby, with fat golden fish swimming in lazy loops. Gilbert gazes at them in awe. From upstairs come two young women, most likely rich daughters of horrible fathers, each wearing beautiful gowns. Donovan wipes a bit of saliva from the corner of his mouth. The goat is unimpressed.You approach the counter, startling the concierge with your muddy, sweaty, stinky appearance. That's right, he can see the stink. There's green wavy lines coming right off you all. The concierge is at least polite enough to hold his breath rather than pinch his nose."Would the lady perhaps like directions to a stable where she can board for the night?"A) "Actually we'll take a suite with full amenities. Bath, breakfast, and large muscular men drenched in oil to fan us as we lazily eat grapes from the vine."B) "Would sir like to have his asshole resized with a broken sword?"C) "We just need a room and some hot water, if you please."D) Rob the innE) Other
>>4317597>B) "Would sir like to have his asshole resized with a broken sword?"
>>4317597>C) "We just need a room and some hot water, if you please."
>>4317602>>4317617You pull the shattered sword from its scabbard on your belt and slap it on the counter. The concierge examines it nervously, and then looks into your eyes to see if you're serious. When he realizes that a steely prostate exam is likely not the most brutish thing you've ever done, begins to quiver. Slowly he reaches beneath the counter and produces a set of keys connected each to a wooden tablet marked with the number "21". You thank him and take the keys.The four of you ascend the stairs, frightening a pair of foppish men in wigs as you stumble by. You follow signposts in the hallways until you reach room 21. Beyond the heavy oaken door is a lavish room the size of some homes you've seen, with a great bed and fireplace, and a carpet made of the skin of a great brown bear. Gilbert lets his excitement get the better of him and begins running around the room and inspecting every inch of it with bright curiosity. The goat follows, eager to chew on every object he can get his mouth around. Donovan sets down the bags and slips out of his boots, letting his bare feet sink into the plush rug. You tell them you'll have the first bath, and move to the next room which features a deep stone tub with a lever that causes hot spring water to gurgle forth from the mouth of a statue near by in the shape of a large fish.The water is hot and refreshing, and you can feel the mud and grime sloughing off of you as you scrub yourself with the provided cloth. By the time you finish, the rags are stained permanently brown, but your skin is revitalized to a soft, glowing pink. Your hair hasn't been straight since you set foot on this cursed continent, and you're finally able to get a brush through it again. As you slip into a bathrobe, Gilbert comes rushing in completely nude and leaps into the bath. You're reminded very briefly of the ogre you fought not long ago. Donovan enters as well, but with the sense to wear a towel.You exit the bath and throw yourself on the bed, spreading your arms and legs out wide and stretching out your back. You haven't been this comfortable in ages. Just as you're about to doze off however, there is a knock at the door.A) AnswerB) Ignore itC) Tell whoever is there that they had better have dinner or you'll hurl them out a windowD) Other
>>4317699>>4317708>>4317729You roll out of bed and get to your feet. You didn't realize how sore your legs were until you had a chance to get off of them for more than a few minutes. As you walk over to the door, you scoop up your shattered sword from the table beside the doorway, hiding it behind your back just in case.You undo the bolt and open the door just slightly. On the other side, standing in the hallway are five men in matching clothes. They have chain shirts, pot helms, short spears and bucklers strapped to their off-hands. Each is also wearing an orange cloak fastened about their shoulders with brass brooches shaped to look like cogs. The one at the front of the group speaks first, in a deep and authoritative voice."Ma'am, we've received reports of criminal activity within the area. Would you mind stepping out into the hall and having a word with us?"A) "You'll have to speak up, I'm naked."B) "Sorry we don't want any goodbye!" C) "I didn't need five strippers. Oh well, fine but I'm not tipping."D) "What seems to be the problem officer?"E) "Ride my nuts pig."D) Other
>>4317738>C) "I didn't need five strippers. Oh well, fine but I'm not tipping."
>>4317738>D) "What seems to be the problem officer?"
>>4317738>B) "Sorry we don't want any goodbye!"
>>4317828>>4317749How about being a little serious since it’s 5 guards
>>4317738>"What seems to be the problem officer?"
Does anyone have a link to the first thread? I’m having trouble finding it in the archives.
>>4317761>>4317766>>4318468You ask the nice man what the problem could possibly be. Surely it couldn't be you threatening the concierge. He wouldn't risk your friendship over something like murder would he?"I'm sure it's nothing at all, miss. We just need to speak to you in the hall for a moment."You look over the guards quickly. Besides their weapons and armor one of them seems to be hiding manacles just out of sight, but just not out of sight enough. You suspect that whatever these men think is going to happen will involve you being dragged out of this building kicking and/or screaming. You look back over your shoulder. Donovan's sword is across the room. It would be handier than yours for certain but going for it would raise their suspicion. You could of course lock the door, but that would be as good as challenging them to bring you in. Calling for the others might be good too, but then it would be three naked people against five armed guardsmen. No matter how this plays out it will be a pickle.A) Call for the others (Medium suspicion)B) Go for Donovan's sword (High Suspicion)C) Enter the hallways alone, naked (Low suspicion)D) Try to flirt your way out (High success chance)E) Try to intimidate your way out (Low success chance)F) Other
>>4319190>C) Enter the hallways alone, naked (Low suspicion)>D) Try to flirt your way out (High success chance)
>>4319206Support. Act innocent and all that.
>>4319206support although I hope nothing bad happens
Weren’t we in pijamas ?>>4319206+1
>>4319206>>4319213>>4319219>>4319221>>4319229You think you have a chance as you are now, bathed and perfumed, to get out of this encounter without needing to slice someone across the middle for once. You gather yourself and step out into the hall, gently closing the door behind you. The guardsmen seem a bit embarrassed to see you in just your bathrobe, but all the more evidence that this very bad idea might work. You look over the guards and size them up. Most of them are younger, save the one doing all the talking. You suspect they are his juniors, just following along as he commands. He himself is rather stern looking, but it's not as if a stubborn man never let his dick do the thinking for him. You go over some characters in your head. You could try coquettish, but that risks alienating anyone who might be into slut shaming. You could also try the innocent little sister type, but if any of these men have children that's a dangerous move. And then there's the trump card of just letting your robe fall from the shoulder slightly, which is going all-in and will almost definitely land you in jail if they see through it. Decisions...A) CoquettishB) InnocentC) Flash some shoulderD) Other
>>4319273>A) Coquettish>C) Flash some shoulder
>>4319275>>4319287>>4319298>>4319300>>4319310You think you can handle this. You've been around classy whores before- they're excellent gossips and more than a few are deft hands at darts. You try to collate all of their personas into one and throw up the mask. You puff out your chest and cock your hips, looking up and down the guards pretending to be interested. Already the two in the back seem off balance. When the leader of the band asks you your name, you ignore him and ask what it is a gang of such rugged men want with you. You see two more of the guards nervously look away. The leader is the tougher nut to crack, though."Miss, you're going to have to come with me to the jailhouse. We're going to ask you a few questions and then you'll be free to go."You've seen enough drunks get hauled out of pubs with that same line. Usually they end up locked in a cell for a week, but that's in dirty towns near the borders. This is a classy place, and if these guards know which hand feeds them they'll toss you in a dungeon without a second thought. You slip the robe off your shoulder with a sly grin."Er, then again maybe we have the wrong person," says the head guard, rubbing his nose with his index finger. You tell him to come back if there's ever anything he needs. He clears his throat and orders his men to keep searching the building.As you retreat back to the room you close the door and turn to see Donovan and Gilbert, wrapped in towels. Donovan has his long hair wrapped up like a turban to dry. They both clap softly, in appreciation of your performance.A) Punch Donovan in the chestB) Give them both the fingerC) Bow gracefullyD) Tell them it'll be their turns to flirt with the guards next timeE) Other
>>4319362>B) Give them both the finger>E) OtherTell Donny to get in bed and please you or he'll flirt naked with the guards next time.
>>4319362>D) Tell them it'll be their turns to flirt with the guards next time>E) Pinch both of their asses while giving a smug face
>>4319367>>4319374>>4319385>>4319412You gesture rudely at both of them, but their cheer pervades. You then point at the great bed, large enough for all four of you to lay in without touching shoulders, and tell Donovan it's time for his sworn duty. The humor drains from the room instantly, and Gilbert swallows nervously. He begins to lead his goat from the room, murmuring something about going to look at flowers. Donovan seems a bit shocked as well."Er, listen I'm flattered but last time there was so much dry heaving and the smell... I mean no offense but I just can't get that out of my head. Maybe we could just have a few drinks and turn in early? We can get the goat drunk, you'd love that!" Donovan speaks with his hands up near his chest in a mock surrendering pose. You can tell his spirit is unwilling.A) Tell him it's fine, and you can just relax in the room tonightB) Tell Gilbert to lock the door on his way out, and not to come back until for an hourC) Throw Donovan at the wall above the bed, and tell Gilbert to pray to whatever fruity gods Elves have that there's still enough of him left by tomorrow that you won't need to look into new applicantsD) Kick them both out and drink yourself to sleepE) Other
>>4319461>B) Tell Gilbert to lock the door on his way out, and not to come back until for three hoursTell Donovan this is 1000% more hygienic than the last time and that we can wash and perfume afterwards.
>>4319461>A) Tell him it's fine, and you can just relax in the room tonightWay to kill the mood. Kick his ass for ruining the fun
>>4319461>B) Tell Gilbert to lock the door on his way out, and not to come back until for an hourthis time we won't fuck it up
>>4319461>B) Tell Gilbert to lock the door on his way out, and not to come back until for an hourIt literally can't be worse than before.
>>4319466>>4319470>>4319483You give Donovan a stern look. He seems not to want to admit that he's cornered, but you command Gilbert to shut and lock the door on his way out. Gilbert hurries out into the hall, looking back only to silently apologize to Donovan.By the time Gilbert returns with his goat at the rear, the room has been turned over. The shrouds draped around the four side of the bed are torn, and the wall behind the headboard is slightly cracked. The rug is crumbled into a ball in the corner. The fireplace crackles as something heavy looking burns up, causing black smoke to rise up the chimney. Donovan is curled into a ball at the edge of the bed like a disobedient dog, and you lay relaxed against the headboard in your robe, just barely fastened, sipping from a glass of red wine. Gilbert says nothing, only ushers Donovan back to the bathroom to wash away his sin. As Donovan goes you take a passing glance at his ass. The hand print is still there.Some time later, as Donovan is scrubbing the groups equipment clean and Gilbert is brushing the bugs out of his goat's fur, there is another visitor at the door. You go to answer it again, but this time there are no guards. Only a short man in a hooded cloak and boots much too large for his feet. He passes up a rolled parchment without looking at you or showing his face."For the miss," he says in a quavering voice. As you reach out for the parchment and grasp it gently, he turns to run. You try to reach out and grab him, but he evades you by an inch and scurries down the hall, knocking a vase off of a small table in his haste. Someone will clean that up.You look at the rolled parchment. It isn't fine paper by any stretch, and smells moldy. There is no seal, but a bit of fraying twine that holds it closed. A) Open itB) Have Donovan open itC) Have Gilbert open itD) Toss it into the fireE) Other
>>4319547>C) Have Gilbert open it
>>4319547>E) Have the Goat open it
>>4319551>>4319569>>4319578>>4319627You head back into the room and spot Gilbert still cleaning up his coat. You tell him a message came for him, and toss it across the room. It spins and lands just as his feet, and he scoops it up gleefully. You watch as he gracefully undoes the twine and unfurls the parchment."Agh!" he cries, "It's awful!" Gilbert throws the parchment down on the floor and cringes in fear of it. Donovan moves over to help him, grabbing a scrub brush to wield as a weapon."What is it, Gil?! What's the matter?!" shouts Donovan."I can't bare to look!" responds Gilbert. You approach as well, you heart beating loudly. When you look down at the unfurled parchment, you see nothing but some poorly scrawled letters. You ask Gilbert what's so bad about it."That penmanship! It's horrible! And the grammar is absolutely grotesque! I think I'm blind! I'm blind!" cries Gilbert, pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes. You snatch the parchment before the goat can get it into her mouth. You read silently from it."Deeyur laydee!We ar gobblinz! We hav mayd repersentativ duhmocruhsee! Cum see! We thank yoo! Bring tall mann and delishus elf! We luv yoo!"The bottom is simply signed "Gobblinz".It would seem the goblins you freed have established themselves nearby. It might be nice to check in on them. Of course, you have other business in town, so perhaps this side trip should wait.A) Go see the goblins first thing tomorrowB) Stay on your path of clearing the old castleC) Other
>>4319712Lol i was thinking the same thing>>4319711>go see the goblins tomorrow>debate on a name for the goatI opt for "Ser Billy the Reliable".
>>4319711>B) Stay on your path of clearing the old castle
>>4319711>B) Stay on your path of clearing the old castleDemocracy? Absolutely heretical
>>4319735>>4319748>>4319794>>4319810As much as you'd love to find out what passes for a supreme court amongst a bunch of goblins who until a few weeks ago were prepare to pillage a whole town on the promise of the scraps, you have a much more pressing goal. You have Gilbert file away the message; which of course means he shoves it deep in a bag to forget about until a narratively convenient time. You tell the others to get a good night's sleep, because you're heading out first thing tomorrow to see about hiring sellswords and ruffians, in that order.Morning comes to the Clockwork City and is accompanied by the clear tones of great bells set in strategic places all around the city. Strategic in that they are designed to insure that nobody has the excuse of sleeping in, as the tolls ring out loud and annoying promptly at an hour past dawn. You fall out of bed and bump your noggin on the way down, causing a throbbing pain as you get back on your feet. Gilbert and Donovan rise as well. Gilbert ties up his clothes and straps on his sandals. Donovan pulls his armor over himself before helping you don yours. It used to take you an hour to put all the plate on properly, but now it takes Donovan an hour while you lazily raise each limb for him. Sometimes you purposely wait to use the bathroom until he's done just to make him do it again. Servants need to be kept on their toes.After a quick breakfast of bread, eggs, bacon and milk stolen from the VIP dinning room, the four of you dash out the door of the inn and into the street. As an ex mercenary Donovan knows all the hot spots in town for hiring. The hirelings guild has a special contract with most sanctioned mercenary companies, but there are some less reputable groups that Donovan knows who work cheap, dirty, and aren't above getting into a scuffle with guards or officials. Finally, as a Paladin (and Princess) there is a chance the clergy will be willing to provide some of their own men-at-arms to the cause, especially when lifting a curse from sacred land. That is, if they're willing to listen to you.A) Find high-end sellswords (Very expensive)B) Find downtrodden sellswords (Modestly priced)C) Speak with the clergy (Depends on reputation)D) Other
>>4320867>B) Find downtrodden sellswords (Modestly priced)they are the most expendable ones
>>4320867B) Find downtrodden sellswords (Modestly priced)The downtrodden are our specialty, ask Donny.
>>4320867>A) Find high-end sellswords (Very expensive)
>>4320867>B) Find downtrodden sellswords (Modestly priced)
>>4320892>>4320902>>4320934Seeing as your budget is a whopping nothing at the moment, you think it prudent to go with a more frugal selection. Donovan agrees, and leads you all down a few streets and alleys, until eventually you come to a small hole-in-the-wall pub called "The Beggar's Banquet". Inside is a large, multi storied operation where the central bar is situated down a small flight of stairs, and serves from all angles. Upon closer inspection you realize the central beam which holds up the ceiling of this place is actually the trunk of a great tree. You suspect this was once a Halfling's home, but when the city expanded over it the creature likely sold it or refurbished it to serve patrons. You do see a fair amount of Halflings going about here, mostly patrons but a few are servers. The low ceiling is amicable for their kind, not to mention the gaggle of Dwarves seated at a long table far on the other side of the establishment.Donovan leads you down to the bar. The four of you take up stools, and order free water. The goat tips his glass and begins lapping at the bar."You'll have your pick here. I don't know many people here personally, but I know most of them by reputation," says Donovan. He then points to the group of Dwarves. "Those are Bear Sarks- Dwarven outcasts. Most of them were thrown out for crimes against their society, but a few are just mad for battle. They're hard to control, but they love a fight. The biggest danger with them is they might tear the fucking castle down before we're done with it."Gilbert takes a swig of his water and grimaces, before dumping it on the bar for the goat. Donovan directs your attention to some odd looking fellows with shaved heads. There looks to be Orcs among them."Those are the Bastard Sons. Run of the mill, but they take in a lot of strays. I hear they do good work, but they have sticky fingers. If they learn about the treasure hoard, I'd bet my left ass cheek they'll turn on us and try to haul it away." Finally Donovan points to a pair of women in light armor. They have painted faces, and are more or less identical. "And those are The Twins. I met them once, briefly. They have a company of women warriors called Circe's Sisterhood, and they don't take very kindly to men for their own reasons. I hear they mostly take bodyguard jobs for highborn ladies slumming it at night. But don't let that fool you, they've made some bloody messes. My old captain says he saw one of them kill three robbers with the bit of metal on the end of her shoelace."All of these trained murderers seem promising, but convincing even one will be a challenge unless you spill the secret of the treasure. Still, perhaps it is better to empty out the vault. It's not as you can carry it yourself.A) Approach the Bear SarksB) Approach the Bastard SonsC) Approach The TwinsD) Other
>>4320978>A) Approach the Bear Sarks
>>4320978A) Approach the Bear Sarks
>>4320978>A) Approach the Bear Sarksits dwarf time
>>4320978>B) Approach the Bastard Sons
>>4320989>>4320997>>4320999You get up from your stool and begin moving over to the table which hosts the group of Dwarves. Each of them is clad in little clothing save for trousers, steel-toed boots, and the occasional jerkin made from padded cloth. For each Dwarf you see a minimum of two tall mugs, one for each open hand as they drink and laugh. When you draw close, one of them notices you over the rim of his mug. He scowls, sets his drink down, and utters something in the Dwarves' deep, gravelly, guttural language. The other all stop laughing and joking and twist their thick necks to face you.You reach the table and glare at them. Each has tattoos plastered across their skin in deep blue colors, with the elders of the group denoted by the fading pigment. None of them speak as you look them up and down, but one does wipe the foam from his bushy mustache and grin at you through a mouth of half missing teeth. Finally, one of them does speak."Can we help you, child? Or perhaps you've come to ask us to keep down the noise?" he says. You can see his hand move down toward his belt, where he thumbs the pommel of a broad dagger tucked away there.A) "Quite the opposite, actually. I've come to join you. They say there isn't a people in the world who can drink like the Dwarves." (Slightly racist)B) "I have. And if any of you want to talk about it we can have a spirited debate outside in the alley." (Appeal to their brutish disposition)C) "Not at all good sirs! I am here to invite you to join me in an epic battle with wicked foes upon a cursed field for only the reward of victory snatched from the jaws of death itself!" (Appeal to their arrogance)D) "I'll let you eat my Elf if you join me on a quest."E) Other
>>4321049>C) "Not at all good sirs! I am here to invite you to join me in an epic battle with wicked foes upon a cursed field for only the reward of victory snatched from the jaws of death itself!" (Appeal to their arrogance)
>>4321049>B) "I have. And if any of you want to talk about it we can have a spirited debate outside in the alley." (Appeal to their brutish disposition)
>>4321075>>4321077You regale the Dwarves with your tale of adventure and fantastic battle, emphasizing the threat of death by hordes of walking dead surrounding an ancient castle. They seem to hand onto your every word, following you from the battle against the goblin army to your divine audience to the daring escape from the crumbling keep. When at last you reach an open hand to invite them all to join you on your noble quest, and honor themselves in the process, you can feel your heart racing and your breath is heavy in your bosom. The Dwarves look at one another and nod."That's all well and good but we ARE mercenaries. I suppose you have some way to pay us?"Damn. You forgot people like to be paid for their labor. A plague upon these people and their obsession with compensation!A) "Payment?! What about being paid in honor! Dignity! Pride!"B) "I can't pay you as much now, but you'll be paid in exposure!"C) "Whoever lives can have a turn with the Elf. He's a screamer."D) Reveal the truth of the treasureE) Other
>>4321130C) "Whoever lives can have a turn with the Elf. He's a screamer."
>>4321130>C) "Whoever lives can have a turn with the Elf. He's a screamer."
>>4321130>D) Reveal the truth of the treasure
>>4321141>>4321149>>4321166You promise the Dwarves Gilbert in exchange for their help. One of them gets up from the bench, and moves over to your companions. Gilbert seems extremely uncomfortable as the Dwarf grabs him by the scruff, lifts him from the stool on which he was sat, and examines him closely. He eyes him like a jeweler eyes a stone. The Dwarf picks through his hair, turns him upside down and shakes him, thumps him on the head and listens closely as if testing a melon, and finally sticks his stubby fingers into Gilbert's mouth to see his teeth. Once the Dwarf seems to finish his work, he looks over to the others and gives a stern thumbs up. They all nod in satisfaction."The young ones are much more malleable, or so they say," whispers one of the Dwarves to another.After a little more negotiation the Dwarves agree to help you retake the keep! However as you are you're nearly unarmed. You have your crossbow, but that won't do much good if you get surrounded. You should procure a weapon before you set out again.A) Buy something cheap and reliable in townB) Ask one of the Dwarves for a loanerC) Steal something, a good deed and a bad deed cancel each other out anywayD) Go as you areE) Other
>>4321241>B) Ask one of the Dwarves for a loaner
>>4321241>A) Buy something cheap and reliable in town
>>4321248>>4321254>>4321343You ask the Dwarves if one of them might lend you a weapon, at least until this is settled. They eyeball you suspiciously."And what kind of warrior goes around without so much as a spare chopper to her name?" says one. The others snicker. You think you hear Donovan snickering, but you'll deal with that later. You shrug and tell the Dwarves that if you'd known stabbing a stone golem would explode your sword you'd have use a broomstick or something. They have another good laugh, but when it subsides one of them wipes a tear from his eye and approaches you. He holds out a hand and asks to see your broken sword, and you show him."I see. Good craftsmanship, but the poor thing hasn't been properly cared for in an age. Tell you what, kiddo: let me show this to a friend of mine in town. If you're lucky he might take a liking to it." You're not too sure what that means but if it means you get paid for a broken half of a sword then why not. You follow the Dwarf out of the pub, telling Donovan and Gilbert to hold things down while you're out. The Dwarf leads you up to the main street and toward the craftsmens' district. You hear the ringing of hammers and grinding of stone wheels. You smell charcoal and sweat and peanut oil. As quickly as you deduce you are in a neighborhood of smithies, the Dwarf rounds a corner and delivers you to a large shop with a proud sign and a sculpture of a bull's head hanging over the doorway, made from hammered sheets of thin steel. The horns of the bull glimmer in morning light.Inside you see rows and rows of young men, and a few women, all hunched over anvils or work tables or troughs of oil. They sweat profusely in the heat, as do you. The Dwarf who brought you here whistles loudly, enough to hurt your ears and startle the smiths out of their work. Then comes a low rumbling voice from the next room."Oy! You lot can stop working when I fucking say so! Swing those hammers or you'll be out on your asses faster than a shot!" The voice belongs to another Dwarf, quite elderly looking but clearly full of vigor. He sees you, then the Dwarf who brought you, and sneers. "Just like an outcast to bring trash into my shop on his boot-heel!"A) "Call me trash again and I'll turn you out like a sack, old man."B) "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you."C) Bow respectfullyD) "I'm here for a weapon. Give me the best one."E) Other
>>4322527>B) "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you."old people are always the most powerful ones so we should not anger him
>>4322527>B) "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you.">C) Bow respectfully>D) "I'm here for a weapon. Give me the best one."
>>4322527>B) "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you."
>>4322540>>4322560>>4322565The old Dwarf looks at you through a dry, swollen eye. He has an expression like one eyeing a piece of moldy cheese. He approaches you and sniffs around you for a moment like a hound. Then his eye is drawn to the grip of your broken sword."That there ain't plain steel, now is it?" he grumbles. The other dwarf, the one who escorted you here, smiles and nods."Nay, cousin. That's a core of [/green]Star Metal[/green], from the Astora. Or it was, when it was forged." The old Dwarf looks up at you and scowls."You've done quite a job taking care of something so rare, haven't you? But no, not just you. For it to have faded this much, it has been neglected for many centuries, I think."A) "Are you gonna give me a weapon or not?"B) "It's a family heirloom, I didn't know it was special other than it looked pretty bitchin."C) "You really need to back up, you smell like a nutsack's ass."D) Other
>>4322631>B) "It's a family heirloom, I didn't know it was special other than it looked pretty bitchin."
>>4322640>>4322651>>4322678The old dwarf is taken aback. He seems surprised you didn't know the nature of this weapon which is totally fair. Someone probably tried to tell you once but you were rich back then, and didn't think you'd ever have to do poor people shit like learn facts about things. You shrug again and tell the dwarf you got nothin to say about it. He reaches out for the sword and you hand it to him."Aye, this could be fun. Never tried to patch up a work this beaten up before. But I've got a lot to do around here, what with these whippersnappers trying my fucking patience!" The old dwarf explodes in anger and kicks over an anvil in front of which one of his apprentices was seated. The backscratcher he was working on goes tumbling to the ground, still red hot. The apprentice gasps and honest to fucking god the dumb fuck tries to pick it up with his fucking hands! Like he literally puts his bare fucking hand on this thing! He screams bloody murder and runs to dunk his hand in cool water.The old dwarf continues to examine the broken blade for a while, but you start to grow impatient. You ask how long this repair might take, which snaps him out of his trance."Eh? Not too long. Few days, I think. I have good materials here. Sometimes rich, piggly little merchants come by with old pieces to have them repaired, and I charge them double the rate in labour and materials. The only ever use the damn things are show pieces anyway. But I don't work free."You tell the old dwarf you don't have much coin now, but you will after this expedition. He clicks his tongue."You must think I was born yesterday! Well I wasn't. I'll take my pay up front. And if you don't have the clinkers now... that armor will do," he says, pointing a stubby finger at your heirloom armor. It has seen better days but it still serves well and you don't doubt anyone who could fix a sword like yours could fix your armor too. But it's the only set you've got, and it's been in the family for generations.A) Agree, and trade the armor for a repaired swordB) Decline, and go swordless but well armoredC) Tell him you have a stretchy young Elf to trade instead (This won't work)D) Other
>>4322707A) Agree, and trade the armor for a repaired swordGlass cannon mode GO
>>4322707>A) Agree, and trade the armor for a repaired sword
>>4322707>B) Decline, and go swordless but well armored
>>4322707>A) Agree, and trade the armor for a repaired swordSteal it back later
>>4322736>>4322720>>4322718>>4322714You agree, and the old dwarf seems pleased. You stand there for a minute or so before realizing when he said up front he meant up front. You ner4vously begin doffing your armor.A few minutes and couple dozen pounds later, your platemail lies in a heap on the old dwarf's workbench. He admires the fluting with a smile. He then turns to look at you over his shoulder and grumbles, "Give me four days. Five at the most, and I'll have your sword done." Not seeing much choice, you nod and allow the dwarf outcast who brought you here to lead you back to the pub. When you arrive, Donovan and Gilbert seem worried. They ask if you've been mugged, and you tell them it will all be clear soon enough. This does nothing to assuage their concerns, but you need a drink right now and you need someone else to pay for it. To that end, you convince a local to buy you a tall mug of ale and then call him a dork as you quaff it. He seems into it, and asks you if you'd be willing to berate him more if he keeps buying you drinks. Whether or not you do isn't important though.Some days later you report back to the old dwarf in his shop. You find him sleeping with his back bent backwards over one of his anvils, and wake up with a good slap. He snorts and farts and stumbles to his feet angrily, but when he uncrosses his eyes long enough to make out that it's you he seems to cheer up. He takes you over to his workbench and produces a sword in a fine, hard-leather sheath. You take it, and draw the blade out just enough to examine the work."It were hard, but I did even better than I would have thought. Reforged the blade with Star Metal and a bit of silver and steel. It won't be much more durable than it was, but it won't shatter at the first clash against something powerfully magical this time. It'll hold an edge longer too, provided you keep it oiled. I also reworked the tang, made it a bit better balanced for your size. And one more thing," he says, stumbling over to show you something. He points to a square area carved delicately into the steel. "Here's a place for a rune. I've only got so many, but I always sign my work. I'll let you take your pick."A) Rune of Flight (The Sword will come to you when called)B) Rune of Fire (The Sword will burn with magical fire)C) Rune of Mountains (The Sword will increase your strength)D) Rune of Moon (The Sword will cut down your foes but not because it likes you or anything)
>>4322769>B) Rune of Fire (The Sword will burn with magical fire)It’s cleansing time
>>4322769>D) Rune of Moon (The Sword will cut down your foes but not because it likes you or anything)TSUNDERE SWORD
>>4322769>D) Rune of Moon (The Sword will cut down your foes but not because it likes you or anything)
Really hoping I don't have to commit to this bit. I will but I hope I don't have to.
>>4322769>B) Rune of Fire (The Sword will burn with magical fire
>>4322791Pardon ? If you meant the tsundere blade, you should know by now if you give a dumb option you should be prepare for it to be chosen
>>4322791does the rune of moon make the sword any stronger or does it just make the sword tsundere?
>>4322819It does what I said it does
>>4322769ah fuck it changing vote to >B) Rune of Fire (The Sword will burn with magical fire)
>>4322769>B) Rune of Fire (The Sword will burn with magical fire)
>>4322835>>4322829>>4322793>>4322781You select the Rune of Fire. The old dwarf nods, and takes the sword back into his possession. He moves over toward the anvil that was until just recently correcting his spine, and sets the blade onto it. He then goes to take up his hammer, which is bright silver and covered in runic symbols, and a chisel. Delicately, carefully, and very very precisely, he beats the fucking shit out of the chisel to carve into the open square a rune of power. As he does, you hear him sing a low, melodic song on the Dwarven language. If you spoke it, you might understand, but you don't so tough tits.Once he is done, he brings the sword back to you, and hands it over. You examine the rune as it shines in the light. You then draw forth the sword and hold it aloft. It ignites with bright, Silver Flames, that do not burn you when you touch them. But the old dwarf assures you that when you strike an enemy, they will feel the merciless bite of a true Star Metal sword."You ought to name it," says the old dwarf. "All the great weapons have names. Isn't that right, Helga?" he asks, gazing at the hammer in his hand. You watch as he open tongue kisses the hammer, without shame. He could at least get a room.Roll 1d100 to name your sword! You can submit two names but they must have separate rolls! You can donate one of you rolls to support another person's name! Shitpost names will be disregarded!
Gonna pause here and let people have time to come up with names, and continue the thread tomorrow. Thanks to everyone who posted! And thanks to the lurkers, who I appreciate even if you only choose to read along!
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>4322897Final Solution
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4322897Blunt Approach
>>4322900>>4322901Sigh. I wish I was rolling for Sworn To Valour.
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4322897fire sword
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4322897Agrippina >>4322898Ok, thanks for running
>>4322931what? it is a sword and it has fire on it therefore it is a fire sword
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4322897Dawn's Light
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4322948Support
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4322897>Sir.Kumscision
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4323215Forgot the roll
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4322897Silver Star. Or Edelweiss.
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4322897Ignia's Revenge
Rolled 61 (1d100)Treblinka
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4322898Argeltaim
>>4324254We have a winner. Writing now.
>>4324438You speak the name of your sword and as you do a warmth seems to travel through your palm and fingers, seeping into your arm up to the shoulder. It's as if the sword is humming with power, and you slide it home into the leather sheath. The old dwarf tells you to get the hell out of his shop.When you return to Donovan and Gilbert, the two of them are all packed up and have assembled the small army of Dwarven Outcasts; The Bear Sarks. Each of them has a light pack slung over their shoulders, as well as weapons which they prefer to carry in their own hands. Outcasts tend to have few worldly possessions, or so you have learned. This is due to their lifestyle of traveling all over the land in search of employment and battle. When you show your companions your shiny new toy, they are both awestruck. "This almost makes me forget you're selling me to Dwarves if this whole advanture pans out!" says Gilbert.You, your companions, and your Dwarven Platoon march at modest speed toward the fallen castle. Dwarves aren't very quick, but they can walk for hours longer than most people without so much as sore feet, so you make decent time. When you finally arrive at the hills before the fortress, you set up a small war tent with the leaders of the Dwarven formations. You discuss possible plans.You might simply charge headlong into the horde of fallen soldiers and start swinging with abandon, but you know that mundane weapons only temporarily halt their advance. Your new sword should be able to eliminate them easily, but Donovan can only slow them down. Gilbert has a limited supply of magical energy, as well as healing mixtures. The Dwarves, luckily enough, can enchant their weapons with the Battle Song, but this effect diminishes with fewer of them as well as with exhaustion, meaning the longer you fight the less they will be able to maintain strength. If too many Dwarves fall, the song will fail entirely.Donovan proposes trying to gain entry into the keep, and one of the Dwarves agrees, if only because it will give you a fortified place to make attacks from. You have little supplies to last you through a siege, however. This means that if the horde trap you, you will have to finish them or starve in the castle.A) Charge headfirst and start swingingB) Make a run for the castle, cutting your way toward the gate and hope most of you get throughC) Try to find another way in while a small force distracts the fallen soldiersD) Other
>>4324462>C) Try to find another way in while a small force distracts the fallen soldiers
>>4324462>A) Charge headfirst and start swinging
>>4324462>D) use the crown to call an ice storm
>>4324518Going with this actually
>>4324518>>4324644>>4324931You stand atop a high hill with the Dwarves and your companions at you back. You close your eyes and concentrate, letting power leave your body and collect within the Diadem. You breath in, and then slowly exhale. Clouds begin to form in all direction, pulled as if by a vortex toward you. The fallen soldiers below begin to stir. They slowly stumble toward you. The Dwarves ready their weapons, but do not charge. The storm cloud darken, and thicken, until you can hear a faint rumble of thunder. The Dwarves look up in curious awe.Soon the clouds gather into a great thunderhead, and light snow begins to fall. A chill wind sweeps over the hills, reddening your nose and cheeks, but you concentrate harder and bend your will toward the clouds. Hail begins to fall, first pea-sized but then quickly as each chunk is as big as an even bigger pea. These hailstones begin clattering off of the helmets, shields and armor of the fallen soldiers. This does not deter them however.The Dwarves begin riling themselves into a frenzy. Donovan and Gilbert prepare for battle to be met. The cold wind and hail is slowing the fallen soldiers, but it does not hinder their focus. You think you could push it just a bit farther, but the strain on you is compounding now.A) Focus harderB) ChargeC) Other
>>4324981>B) ChargeLet's get to the castle and clean them since they're slow now
>>4324981>A) Focus harder
>>4325010>>4325000>>4324990You relax your focus just enough to open your eyes and survey the battlefield. The fallen soldiers move at a crawl, giving you and your allies plenty of time to advance. You draw your sword, and it comes to life with silver flames. On your command, the Dwarves and your companions begin descending the hill.You fan out and meet the fallen soldiers in melee. Each stroke of your brilliant sword cuts down one of their number, and they do not reform again, but begin to burn with the same silver flame that engulfs your weapon until all that remains is white ash. The Dwarves swing heavy axes and hammers as they cry their battle chant, crumbling even more of the unliving enemies. Donovan and Gilbert provide water to keep everyone hydrated because they're not magic. For nearly a full hour you all hack and slash single soldiers, until you start to tire. You have made an impressive cull of them, yet more still seem to rise or appear from unseen corners. Suddenly though, Donovan gives a shout of warning and points up toward the sky. You look, and are shocked to see a great green mass of some substance that is almost translucent. It gathers and churns high up near the clouds."It's a Soul Storm!" shouts one of the Dwarves. "This shit is about to get weird!"Then as you watch the green mass, something begins to coalesce within it. It is a mass of bones and metal, but you can't quite make out the shape.A) Bone GiantB) Bone MinotaurC) Bone LionD) Bone DaddyE) Just like a big pile of living bones
>>4325376>D) Bone Daddy
>>4325376>D) Bone DaddyUwU Bone Daddy
>>4325378>>4325390>>4325407>>4325417The great swirling mass finally takes a solid shape, and descends upon the battlefield. It is nearly ten feet in height, clad in armor of obsidian, and has an apron around its neck and waist that reads "The Grillfather" in runic script. The fiend has four arms, each sheathed in twisted metal. In one it holds a scimitar, in another a great spatula. The last two work together to carry a small barbecue grill, in which burn fiery coals.The terrible fiend screams with bloodthirst, and begins moving toward you, unabated by the cold.A) Charge aloneB) Charge with your companionsC) Charge all togetherD) Other
>>4325439>B) Charge with your companions
>>4325442>>4325445>>4325556You raise your sword and call for Gilbert and Donovan (and the goat) to follow you and attack the great new enemy. They rush to your side, and all four of you rush into battle.The great fiend lobs the contents of it's grill at you, sending the hot coals arcing through the air. Donovan evades a shower of them just barely, but Gilbert is singed several times. You are hit by a few, but press on. Gilbert begins casting a spell, while his goat circles him as if to defend him from attack. Donovan meanwhile engages the Bone Daddy, clashing his sword against the scimitar in one of its hands. You move to the opposite side to flank it, and bring your sword to meet the spatula.The two of you ring swords against the monster, unable to rest and barely able to breathe from the sheer speed at which the gargantuan grillmeister move. Donovan slash at his arm, but the black metal armor deflect his blade. You try piercing his side, but even the edge of your enchanted sword does little but scratch the thick plate. You need to create an opening, or you'll tire yourself out before you have a chance of damaging it at all.A) Tell Donovan to do somethingB) Try to take out a legC) Try to take out an armD) Cast a spell (Write-in)E) Other
>>4325572>D) Cast a spell (Write-in)Let's freeze one of his legs and destroy it
>>4325590>>4326221>>4326334You focus on the Diadem again, and with a deep inhale, you breath icy wind onto the creature's massive leg. Ice begins to build there, and creeps both up and down until it begins to stiffen the monster's knee, as well as root the whole leg to the ground. The monster looks down at you and raises its weapon to strike, but before it can you bring your sword around and it collides with the ice, sending out a burst of silver flame and force that shatters the ice along with the monster's leg. It crumbles and falls, landing on its side before you. Donovan leaps onto it, and clumsily clambers across its body until he is within distance to plunge his sword into the monster's eye. It lets out a bloody scream, then reaches a hand up and grabs hold of Donovan, squeezing him tight and preparing to hurl him across the battlefield.A) Attack the arm holding DonovanB) Try for a killing blowC) Other
>>4326747>A) Attack the arm holding Donovan
>>4326769>>4326779>>4326820You raise your sword and bring it down and across to cut the arm of the monster. It bites into the metal armor, but does not cut all the way through. This is enough to stop is tossing Donovan, and in fact the big bony hand drops him so that he lands back on its chest.Donovan slides down from on top of the monster and assists you in freeing your weapon by clashing his into it. The two of you get a bit of distance from the monster and watch as it rises to its feet again, with three good arms remaining, and begins to stoke the fire of its grill to send another volley of coals at you. Just then a great boulder comes flying and crashes into the head of the big bone guy, and sends him teetering. You look over briefly and see Gilbert, short of breath with his wand still raised. It seems his Stone Toss spell has come along nicely. As the great monster teeters, you channel the power of your Diadem once more to create a cold wind that captures on of its knees, forcing it to the ground again. As this breath leaves you, your legs begin to buckle. Donovan reaches out to catch you. You try to gather yourself but as you watch the bone daddy struggle to stand you see several of the Dwarves rush forward to meet it in melee. They cut and smash with weapons blessed by their Battle Song, sending chunks of black metal and bone flying all around. Just as you catch your breath, the monster grabs hold of one Dwarf and tosses him into its gaping mouth, chewing him into a goop and spitting him onto the ground as a mass of flesh. The other Dwarves, seeing their comrade die so brutally, run to join the fight. But as they come, the fallen soldiers begin to gather around you again.A) Let the Dwarves comeB) Tell them to go backC) Other
>>4326914C)Tell them to split so a group remain stalling the undead while you finish the monster
>>4326914>A) Let the Dwarves come
>>4326928>>4327227You yell to the Dwarves, telling some of them to go back and others to keep going. This very obviously confuses them, as some turn around, then aren't sure if they're the ones who are supposed to go back or not. Other keep going but then get called back by others. Basically they just sort of start walking back and forth with vague uncertainty.Meanwhile the big bone guy tosses the other Dwarf that was already wailing on him, sending him sailing through the air into a small crowd of swarming skeleton soldiers. They begin stomping on him gangland style. Eventually he does start wildly flailing his weapon to disperse them, but the collective enchantment of the Dwarven weapons is beginning to fade. Fewer and fewer of their swings seem to permanently end the fallen soldiers, and there are still a great many hundred of them stumbling across the battlefield.You turn to see Gilbert beginning to channel magical energy once again. The goat rams enemies, turning them into heaps for a few moments before they can rise once more. Gilbert looks absolutely exhausted from exertion, and this may be his last great contribution to the battle.A) Tell him to deal another blow to the Bone DaddyB) Tell him to hinder the fallen soldiers so you can finish the Bone DaddyC) Tell him to create an escape route for you allD) Tell him to use the skullE) Other
>>4327467>B) Tell him to hinder the fallen soldiers so you can finish the Bone Daddy
>>4314203>not putting link to the previous threadsWhy do people do this?
>>4327471>>4327522>>4327552You tell Gilbert to hold back the horde of enemies so that you can deliver a final, killing stroke to the great monster. He doesn't answer, but as his power coalesces you sense that he has bent his will toward the soldiers.You and Donovan rush in to meet the Bone Daddy in melee. He brings his scimitar around but you both evade it. As you draw near, Donovan dashes just ahead and kneels, allowing you to leap onto his back and use him as a springboard. He stands with all the force in his lower body, boosting you up and far enough to land on the shoulder of the Bone Daddy, clinging on for dear life as it rises to its feet. Meanwhile a ways back, Gilbert finishes weaving his spell. The stormclouds you summoned using the power of the Diadem -still amassed and delivering hail down onto the battlefield- begin to concentrate into one enormous, roiling mass. They cease producing hail, and suddenly a rain of crystalline spikes begins to fall. Each one is the size of a fence post, and they drive themselves into the earth with such force as to stand straight up after landing. They arrange themselves in a loose pattern that creates a rough blockade, keeping the fallen soldiers from amassing into a great blob. This in turn allows the Dwarves to more easily divide them into manageable chunks of bone.You look back to the Bone Daddy and see it glaring up at you. With your sword in hand, you thrust into a space between two metal plates, and watch as a burst of silver flame gushes from within. The monster screams again, and you feel its strength begin to fail. You look back to check on Gilbert, and are horrified. He has collapsed to his hands and knees, drained of his strength by the powerful magic. His goat fends off fallen soldiers alone, but is not nimble enough to stop them all as they near him.You don't know what killing the Bone Daddy will do, but you don't think you have time to reach Gilbert either way. If you do nothing, he may die here. A) Finish the monster offB) Try to save Gilbert (write-in)C) Cast a spell (Danger!)D) Other
>>4327898>A) Finish the monster off
>>4327911>>4327929>>4328395>>4328485You turn away from Gilbert and focus on the great Bone Daddy. It seems to glare up at you, daring you to strike. You grant this request, and raise your silver flame sword up, turning it in your grip and then plunging it with all of your weight down into the head of the monster. The blade pierces bone and is driven deep, sending a gout of flame up and around. The flames lick you, but do not burn. The monster screams. In the following moment all of the chaotic and volatile magical energy that came together to form the Bone Daddy are released, and explode outward in every direction. You are tossed, flipping head over tail until you come down onto the stony earth with a crunch. You lose consciousness for a moment.As you regain your wits, you try to look around and examine the situation. For some reason, you can only see out of your right eye. What you do see with it is distressing though. A great field of metal shards and bones now exists all around you. The Bone Daddy is no longer a threat, but the magical explosion that you unleashed with the killing blow has scorched the field and sent Donovan crashing to earth as well. The Dwarves, or the ones that are left, are dazed and wounded. The fallen soldiers crumble without being touched now though. Perhaps the lingering magic that bound them was destabilized by the blast.Finally, you see Gilbert. He is slumped against a rock, with his goat nudging him. There is a rusted, broken sword jutting from his side, and blood runs down his side like a river. There is still a skeletal hand clinging to the broken sword.And then, your eye closes and you fall into sleep.
Stopping this thread here for now. Sorry this one was more scattered than previous threads, I'll try to be better about updates going forward, assuming you all still want more of this. Let me know! I like writing this story and I have some fun ideas about ways it could go. There won't be a new thread for the next few days. I'll post here Friday or Saturday to update whoever sticks around! Depending how things go it might be a couple weeks before I can commit the time though.As always, I'm open to advice and suggestions to improve things! And as always I want to truly thank players for taking the time to be part of this game, and of course thanks to the lurkers. I'm happy that a cool handful of people like this enough to hang out every thread!Let me know if you guys want more, and how you hope things go!
>>4328541The story is progressing well. Waiting warmly for you OP
>>4328541since this is the end of the thread then I am going to archive it
>>4328670Thank you, much appreciated
>>4328541I want more.
>>4328541Fun time as always man.
>>4314748Thank you kindly, I was coming up blank.>>4314203I suggest posting links to the suptg archive and this first thread as part of your opening posts, so potential new anons know where to start.
New thread will go up next weekend! Probably Friday
>>4339829Looking forward to it!
>>4339829Nice, I couldn't keep up from last thread. Maybe this time I could join on time.