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So, in case your new to this quest, (I think this quest may be the longest running on /qst/, not sure to be honest.) then good luck. The archives are in the Character Sheet, so there you go.

Character Sheet: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jI0aGxA_2h3SAcPYri-1fdgskbK3IbtfEzSLJ7VY9gU/edit

Twitter: @QuestingQM

My other quest is Nazi Experiment Quest, which is sadly delayed due to me accidently deleting the lore.

You are Renexizious, and you are speaking to Lorriana, a gold dragon who either likes you, or dislikes you. You honestly can't tell.

"So. From what I gather, your talents lie in research?" you crook your head slightly.

"My word, you've understood what I said." She puts her hand over her mouth, feigning wonder.

"...I'm really fucking tired of your sarcasm." You slam your fist into a table, and cause it to break in half.

"Too bad, Ren. Too bad." She takes a sip of her wine, and looks back at you, amused.

"Don't fucking call me that, It's Renexizious to you. No one fucking calls me Ren." You are this close to strangling her. Too bad the voices in your head want you to appoint her as a minister of research or try to give her a rather good tumble.

"Too bad. It's quite popular around here."

"Son of a bit- Never mind. Now, here's what I want you to do."

Choices.

>Appoint her into the Imperial Research Director.
>Tell her to remain a courtier and stay out of trouble.
>Appoint her into the Defense Director.
>Write-In
>>
>>333104
>Appoint her into the Imperial Research Director.
>>
>>333104
>>Appoint her into the Imperial Research Director.
>>
>>333104
>>Appoint her into the Imperial Research Director.
SCIENCE!
>>
"Alright, probably against my better judgement, your in charge of research." You take a deep breath, ready for the inevitable sarcasm coming your way, and for the inevitable voices telling you to give her a tumble.

"Truly? Verily well, I could get used to research... Even if it's for someone else." She drinks the rest of her wine and gets up.

Lorriana has become your Research Director
Bonuses: Aged Scientist (+2 on all Research Rolls, and in addition, one free tech.)

Actions.

>Whelp, ask if she'd be willing to preform "science" with you and Elizabeth. Hell, maybe Amaya can join. (Charisma)
>Ask if she'd be willing to help you and Elizabeth out with science! (Charisma)
>No, ignore the voices in your head, Your pope after all. You have standards. As in, your supposed to not have sex, right?

And no, I am still not writing smut. Someone else can.
>>
>>333123
>No, ignore the voices in your head, Your pope after all. You have standards. As in, your supposed to not have sex, right?
Since he has voices in his head I'm going to assume that ren hears all our suggestions basically making him an insane fascist dragon emperor.
>>
>>333123
>Whelp, ask if she'd be willing to preform "science" with you and Elizabeth. Hell, maybe Amaya can join. (Charisma)
>>
>>333123
>>Ask if she'd be willing to help you and Elizabeth out with science! (Charisma)
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
>>333123
Lewdest choice.
maybe she can improve the pregnancy trials further?
>foursome
>>
>>333123
>>Ask if she'd be willing to help you and Elizabeth out with science! (Charisma)
>>
>>333135
...Who the hell are you going to get in a foursome? Anitta?
>>
>>333123
>Ask if she'd be willing to help you and Elizabeth out with science! (Charisma)
>>
Looks like you, elizabeth, and Loriana wins.

Roll me a 1d20+7 (+2 from Pheremones.)
Also, I'll grant you a +1 modifier for good pick up lines, or keeping in Turkish tradition, really angry pickup lines.
Then again, you guys are probably going to roll a one since it's tradition.
>>
Rolled 9 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>333161
>>
Rolled 20 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>333161
I got no pickup lines worth a damn.
>>
>>333171
Doesn't look like you need them.
>>
>>333171
But apparently I got a 20, go me. Offering a half-baked line for inspiration.

"Don't tell me you aren't curious what it would be like. Two dragons together..."
>>
File: 1458706845733.gif (1.9 MB, 750x396)
1.9 MB
1.9 MB GIF
>>333171
When the fuck have we ever gotten a twenty on tumbling except with Elizabeth?

Writing.
>>
>>333171
20+7=27

Critical Success!

The voices in your head compell you to try and give her a good tumble. You shrug mentally and decide why the fuck not. So you give her the classic pickup line. As in, you just grab her and holster her over your shoulder. She laughs, and is quite entertained by this.

"What are you doing, Ren?"

"Showing you how to do SCIENCE!"

Roll me a fucking 1d20+15 for how manly you are. Also...

Reveal Eye?

>Yes.
>No.
>>
Rolled 18 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>333180
>Yes
>>
>>333180
>No.
Using the eye is pretty wasteful out of combat or intimidate situations.
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
Rolled 13 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>333180
>No
>>
>>333180
No
>>
No more rolls please.
>>
>>333182
18+15=33

Overwhelming Success!

You did well, sufficiently said, and it all fades to black.

Now, for Industry.

Treasury: $5 Million.

>Encourage Industry.
>Construct new Industry.
>Repair current Industry. (Cost: $5 Million)
>>
>>333206
>>Repair current Industry. (Cost: $5 Million)
>>
>>333206
>Construct new Industry.
>>
>>333206
>Repair current Industry. (Cost: $5 Million)
>>
You repair all damaged and destroyed industry.
It is now the beginning of Fall.

You have heard reports that Oslo has... Well, the local Yuan-Ti populace has surpassed that of human population. You could intercede, or simply let it be.

>Order Yuan-Ti in Oslo to resettlement programs in other sections of the Empire.
>Order a purge of the Yuan-Ti in Oslo.
>Leave the Yuan-Ti alone, they aren't causing any problems after all.
>Write-In
>>
>>333221
>Leave the Yuan-Ti alone, they aren't causing any problems after all.
>>
>>333221
>>Leave the Yuan-Ti alone, they aren't causing any problems after all.
>>
>>333221
>>Order Yuan-Ti in Oslo to resettlement programs in other sections of the Empire.
It's not so much that we don't want them in Oslo, it's more that we want them everywhere else as well.
>>
>>333227
Perhaps instead of resettlement programs you could offer loans to different species to move into areas where there are less of them (by ratio). That'd lead to a more even distribution...
>>
Ending voting in twelve minutes.
>>
>>333230
I'm liking this idea, seconding.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d2)

Whelp, rolling.

1=Leave them alone.
2=Loan Relocation.
>>
Loan Relocation.

Now, of course, since your treasury is at 0, you can't really do this actions from your treasury... You do however, have a few other actions.

>See if you can't get banks to hop onto this idea.
>...See if you can't get Viktor to help fund this.
>Order emergency taxes. (-Popularity, and Loyalty.)
>Forced Resettlements. (-Yuan-Ti Loyalty.)
>Write-In
>>
>>333266
>Write-In
This is more so a joke suggestion than anything but why don't we get a job? I mean, we are pretty much a one-dragon mining, logging or smelting operation.

Failing that, why don't we try getting some more funds for our treasury the traditional way; lets go pillage a neighbouring countries villages and shit!
>>
>>333266
>See if you can't get banks to hop onto this idea.
>>
>>333266
>>See if you can't get banks to hop onto this idea.
>>
>>333274
...I'm going to answer this, even if it's a joke answer.

First off, I don't think anons really want to fry burgers or something, or act as a mobile freezer, although I would be willing to write that. However for the second thing, pretty much all the countries next to you are either allied or neutral, or you have a non-aggression pact with. Unless you want to loot your own countryside.
>>
You decide to appeal to the banks.

You call up the bank, and hear a familar voice on the other line.

"Ah, it's my favorite goyim! What can God's chosen people do for you today?"

"I need you to give out loans to the Yuan-Ti in Oslo so they'll spread out."

"...Goyim, I'm not made of shekels, you know."

Actions.

>You better be, or I'll come down there and get the money myself. (Intimidate, HARD)
>Fine. I'll be willing to compensate when the treasury refills, alright? (Diplomacy, HARD)
>...What do you want in exchange? (Charisma)
>Yeah. I'll find someone else.
>Write-In
>>
>>333291
>You better be, or I'll come down there and get the money myself. (Intimidate, HARD)
Threaten him with the gas chambers that we dont have nor can afford to make.
>>
>>333291
>>...What do you want in exchange? (Charisma)
We got a lot of money from him already.
>>
>>333291
>>...What do you want in exchange? (Charisma)
>>
Roll me a 1d20+5 for this.
>>
Rolled 1 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>333310
>>
Rolled 3 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>333310
>>
File: Free_Places.jpg (4 KB, 95x125)
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>>333320
>>333320
...Use barbaric to avoid getting Jewed?
>>
>>333328
Yes
>>
>>333328
>Yes
>>
>>333328
No
>>
>>333333
>First post in thread
>Hex-get
>>
>>333333
Holy shit, check 'em
>>
>>333333
Check 'em.
>>
Waiting three more minutes.
>>
Alright, looks like YES wins.

Roll me a 1d20
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>333361
>>
>>333363
I have no words.
>>
>>333363
We once again have counter jewed the jew.
>>
File: 1456268194128.gif (2 MB, 300x300)
2 MB
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>>333363
...This anon is the luckiest man alive.

You anons have Jewed the Jews again, right as they were about to Jew you.
>>
File: image.jpg (98 KB, 700x504)
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98 KB JPG
>>333363
>Post yfw the Jew fears the Dragon-Pope
>>
>>333371
>Joined this thread to find the X6 poster
>Stayed for the story
I love this board.
Also, think you could help us in the Magic Duel Save the Princess super crossover thread tomorrow? Finale is fast approaching and we need to succeed so we can fail.
>>
>>333381
I have never followed either of those quests, even before the crossover. Furthermore, I won't even be online tomorrow. Sorry anon
>>
>>333363
>>333363
20
Critical Success on a Barbaric Roll!

Khorne Wills It!

"Sorry greatest ally, but we're climbing to our noses in debt! We can't hand any more mone-"

"Did I say it was a request?"

"...No."

"That's right. I didn't. Do you understand?"

"Bu-But, my sheke-"

You crush the tiny phone in your claws. It seems you'll have to do this the hard way.

You fly down to the Goldmeister Bank, and civilians scatter. The bank's owner is outside, and you pick him up.

"Where is my money?"

"T-The... The... The elves don't want me to give you any, goyim! I'm sorry!"

"Elves?"

You put the Jew down, and look inside. You note that there's about twelve knife ears.

You solve this by breathing ice inside the building, freezing the Elven Jews, and then you tear off the front of the building to get at them. You note that they taste quite good, like a frozen Popsicle. after eating them.

You lower your head to the bank's Owner.

"I am sorry about the mess, but when are you getting me my fucking money?"

He rushes inside, along with his employees. They come out with cartloads of Swedish Marks.

"Thank you, greatest ally."

Now, that you have effectively bankrupted the bank, what will you do to the bank owner?

>Whelp, he did help you out twice. Grant him position as the Economic Advisor.
>...Eat him. You don't like people who make deals with elves.
>Leave him and his destroyed bank behind.
>Write-In
>>
>>333391
>Whelp, he did help you out twice. Grant him position as the Economic Advisor
Utilize the resources provided to you
>>
>>333390
That's alright. It's about saving a Princess in one and a magical duel to the death in the other. Look them up, they're pretty great.
Now to play catch up on all the shit ITT I missed.
>>
>>333391
>Whelp, he did help you out twice. Grant him position as the Economic Advisor.
What better way to save money than putting a jew on the job?
>>
>>333391
>Leave him and his destroyed bank behind.
>>
>>333391
>>Whelp, he did help you out twice. Grant him position as the Economic Advisor.
>>
>>333412
Asign him a bodyguard/handyman or two, so that if anyone unsavory(elf) comes, he could have the handymen/bodyguards throw them out.

No jewing our jew.
>>
>>333391
>>Whelp, he did help you out twice. Grant him position as the Economic Advisor.
We need to fill our cabinet.
>>
"I suppose I will take pity upon you. Report to my palace at once."

"...Is this another shoah?"

"...Maybe. Depends on how well you serve me."

You fly off and return to your palace, and begin organizing the loaning to the Yuan-Ti.

Now that's done, it's time for the Nation.

National Actions. (3)

There are reports that the Queen of England's condition is becoming worse.

Choose three.

>Research Something.
>Papal Actions
>Assign new Cabinet members.
>Construct Something.
>Recruit more Soldiers
>Reform Government
>Spread Religion
>Spread Culture
>Encourage Industry
>Diplomacy
>Espionage
>Forge a claim...
>Use your Mutagen...
>Write-In

Personal Actions.

>Talk to your Wife
>Talk to Hans
>Talk to Claw
>Talk to Maria about her boyfriend.
>Talk to Charlemagne
>Call for more Concubines.
>Talk to Inquisitor Amaya.
>Read Something
>Go to the University.
>Talk to Lorriana.
>Oversee your new children.
>Talk to a Vassal
>Write-in
>>
>>333427
>Construct Something.
>Spread Religion
>Spread Culture

>Talk to Inquisitor Amaya.
>>
>>333427
>Research Something
>Spread Religion
>Encourage Industry

>Read something
>>
>>333427
>Research Something.
>Encourage Industry
>Assign new Cabinet members.
>Oversee your new children.
>>
>>333427
>>Research Something.
>>Papal Actions
>>Construct Something.

>>Oversee your new children.
>>
>>333427
>>Research Something.
>Diplomacy
>Use your Mutagen...
>Oversee your new children.
>>
File: Religions-1952.jpg (1.11 MB, 4170x3210)
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Looks like Spread religion, Research, Encourage Industry wins, along with Oversee Children.

Pic related is maps of religion. Big changes around Germany since 1951.
>>
>>333460
Spread Draconic-Catholicism to Constantinople
>>
>>333460
>Draconic Catholicism to Russia
>>
>>333460
Spread Draconic-Catholicism to Russia.
>>
>>333475
Seconding
>>
File: Map 1952.jpg (1.1 MB, 4170x3210)
1.1 MB
1.1 MB JPG
And this is a map of the world.

Where will you spread you religion to, but first select.

>Draconic
>Draconic-Catholic.
>Catholicism.

Also, there is a major sect division in Draconic-Catholicism now...

Select which one you would rather support.

>Diviners, this sect believes you are the Son of God.
>Fanatic Diviners: This sect believes you are God himself.
>Apologist, this sect believes you are simply just a saint.
>Idolists, this sect believes becoming a draconic creature is the height of piety.

Then, finally choose where you want to spread your faith.
>>
>>333483
>Draconic-Catholic.
>Diviners, this sect believes you are the Son of God.
>>
>>333483
>Draconic-Catholic.
>Idolists, this sect believes becoming a draconic creature is the height of piety.
>>
>>333483
>>Draconic-Catholic.
>Fanatic Diviners: This sect believes you are God himself.
>>
>>333490
Changing my vote to fanatic diviners
Also spead it to russia
>>
>>333483
>>Draconic-Catholic.
>Idolists, this sect believes becoming a draconic creature is the height of piety.
>Constantinople.
>>
>>333483
>Russia
>>
>>333483
>>Draconic-Catholic.
>Diviners, this sect believes you are the Son of God.
>Russia
Baby steps.
>>
>>333483
Russia
>>
>>333333
>>333363
What the fuck.
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>333516
All right, fuck it. Changing to fanatic diviners.
>>
Whelp, fanatic diviners wins. Roll me a 1d20+6 (+2 from Amaya.)
>>
Rolled 19 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>333543
>>
Rolled 5 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>333543
>>
Rolled 10 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>333543
>>
>>333550
Nice
>>
File: Races 1952.jpg (1.08 MB, 4170x3210)
1.08 MB
1.08 MB JPG
>>333550
>>333550
19+6=25

Overwhelming Success!

Amaya has gone to Moscow to preach your name, and you have sided with the Fanatical Diviners. You wonder why you haven't had people worship you in the first place, but oh well.

You hear from Elizabeth that the second American Debate is starting soon... What do?

>Watch it with your kids.
>Watch it with Charlemagne.
>Watch it alone.
>Watch it alone and bring snacks.
>No, the last debate was awfully boring. For some reason.
>Write-In
>>
>>333589
>Watch it with all your friends and bring loads of snacks.
>>
>>333589
>>Watch it with your kids.
>>
>>333589
>>Watch it with your kids.
>>
>>333589
>Watch it with your kids.

And maybe Elizabeth as well
>>
>>333611
Obviously Elizabeth will join us, she's the one who told us it's starting.
>>
Rolled 10, 18, 5 = 33 (3d20)

You get your kids around, call Charlemagne, who's arm is still mending from his fight with the damned Turk, and you sit down to watch the Debate. You also call for the two wards, that greek kid and Reuviere.

If you want, you can warn your kids that it might be graphic for younger audiences.

>Nah. Let them see their older brother.
>Sure. You are responsible dragon-dad.

Ignore my rolling.
>>
>>333633
>Nah. Let them see their older brother.
>>
>>333633
>Nah. Let them see their older brother.
>>
>>333633
>>Nah. Let them see their older brother.
>>
>>333633
>Nah. Let them see their older brother.

Have the white death and Finnish snipers on standby ready to take out the tv if it gets violent
>>
Rolled 9, 14, 16 = 39 (3d20)

>>333633
Viktor and Sparkman are on the center stage, both seems rather cool-headed this time, and the first question is asked.

"What do you intend to do as your first presidental action?"

Viktor interrupts Sparkman, and begin speaking.

"Well, I would make sure that the United States is secure from all foreign threats, even that of my father... In fact, especially that of my father. Who knows what he could attempt on the United States? We must prepare in case he turns his armies here."

Sparkman counters him.

"...Aren't you his son? Wouldn't you have loyalty to your own father?"

"I moved to the United States of my free will. I consider myself a citizen of these fifty united States, and my father's son second. Who are you to question my patriotism?"

The crowd agrees with Viktor, and the second debate question is opened up.

Rolling.
>>
Rolled 4, 9, 16 = 29 (3d20)

>>333652
...I accidentally put red text, sorry anons.

The second question is asked.

"Viktor, there are rumors you attempted to assassinate Sparkman... Is this true?"

"Do you think me so stupid to say yes on television? No. Of course not, it's clearly someone trying to get my inevitable election controversial as possible."

Sparkman proceeds to follow up.

"I did save his life, so I doubt that he would try to take mine."

The crowd generally agrees.

Rolling.
>>
Rolled 8, 3, 14 = 25 (3d20)

>>333663
"Now, for both of you... Who do you consider to be your greatest role model?"

"What sort of question is that?" Viktor snarls.

"...Well, my favorite role model would be Superman." Sparkman answers. The crowd cheers at the mention of that.

Viktor however, seems angry.

"Fu- I mean, Superman is nothing more then a paper-cut out, hell, liberal propaganda at it's finest! My role model, is of course, President Andrew Jackson, a-"

A crowd member yells out "Racist!" and Sparkman quickly interrupts.

"You take that back, Superman is a national ico-"

"Captain America is better, faggot!" one of the crowd yells.

"I agree with his statement." Viktor nods.

It seems the crowd is heavily divided on this...

However, what do you consider to be in the right?

>Captain America is indeed, better.
>Superman is for men!

Rolling.
>>
>>333697
>>Captain America is indeed, better.
What kind of a dummy actually LIKES Superman?
>>
>>333697
>>Superman is for men!
He's hard to do right, but he's good.
>>
>>333697
I'd rather put Reginaldo Giuliani who was an Italian military chaplain. He isn't an illegal alien with questionable motives and he didn't use performance enhancing drugs.
>>
>>333729
>>333697
Yes
>>
Rolled 14, 6, 13 = 33 (3d20)

>>333697
>>333697
Viktor seems a little angry, but otherwise calm.

The next question is asked.

"What is your stance towards the Swedish Empire's fast growth in Europe?"

Viktor answers first, naturally.
"I think we should condemn their genocide of the Turks in Constantinople, and demand a trade embargo with them. If they cannot be reasoned with, we should mobilize NATO."

Sparkman counters.
"So hostile towards your father, eh? I suppose you are nothing more then a backstabber. I would extend a helping hand to him, as he is a rising power, after all."

Viktor gets angry and you can see smoke come from his mouth.

"I told you, I am a-"

"Your a fascist, that's true."

"Well, we can agree to disagree then, Sparkman. I am not a fascist."

"Well, I couldn't tell from your talk show."

The crowd is somewhat divided, but is leaning towards Sparkman. Viktor looks somewhat angry, but is trying to keep cool.

Rolling.
>>
Rolled 5, 16, 17 = 38 (3d20)

>>333743
The next question is asked.

"Do either of you have a romantic interest?"

Viktor is suspicious.
"Who needs to know that? Also, that's a pretty bad question for a debate."

Sparkman agrees.

"Yeah, who needs to know that?"

The questioner answers back.

"The American People."

Both of them go silent, and the crowd mumurs to itself.

Rolling for next question.
>>
The next question is asked.

"For our second to last question... What is your position on the Chineese Revolution?"

Viktor answers.

"Well, that's easy. We should extend a helping hand to those touched by the revolution."

Sparkman nods along with that.
It seems both of them are... Kind of getting along stage, to a degree.

Rolling this time in private.
>>
>>333767
The final question is asked.

"What is your stance on the American Communist Party?"

Viktor sighs and answers.

"They're communists, and should be sent to prison, of course, unless they want to change their mind."

Sparkman... Answers badly.

"...Well, I think they should be listened to, I mean, maybe their right about some th-"

Instantly the crowd starts throwing things at Sparkman, calling him a communist. Viktor looks enraged. (Most likely on purpose.)

"You see people! I told you for months... The opposition are nothing more then communist sympathizers!"

The crowd cheers, and it some people get out of their seats. It seems Viktor might of inspired them to assault Sparkman.

Rolling in private.
>>
File: 1461328925947s.jpg (8 KB, 250x166)
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8 KB JPG
>>333789
Post your face when the crowd's anger is a natural twenty.
But Sparkman's defense is a natural twenty.

What should happen, anons? I'm confused to be honest.
>>
>>333802
Nothing
>>
>>333802
Sparkman gets attacked but defends against them all with politician-like reflexes.
>>
>>333802
He intimidates them to back down, appealing to public decency. Like that scene in to kill a mockingbird.
>>
>>333802
The crowd turns out to be composed entirely of elves and get ready to attack but are then thwarted by the sparkman beatdown.
>>
>>333789
Twenty vs Twenty.

Who will win?

The crowd is angry as fuck, first off a communist is in the damn room, and Viktor's anger only fuels them.

Sparkman however, yells something.

"However! What would our founding fathers think of us prosecuting others for their beliefs!"

The crowd goes silent... And slightly disappointed in themselves. Viktor's anger grows a little more, being thwarted yet again by the Dastardly Sparkman.

Rolling in private to see what happens.
>>
The crowd begins to go back to their seats, but Viktor is fucking enraged. He yells out to the crowd.

"The founding fathers would want us to fight for freedom! Not to be slaves to communism! Fight damn you! Fight for the Fathers! FIGHT!

The crowd cheers, but Sparkman readies himself. A chair is thrown at him, but he rolls away directly into a man trying to kick him. Sparkman evades to the side and kicks the man straight in the leg, knocking him over. Another man comes at him with his fist, but Sparkman catches it, and twists it, breaking the mans hand. The crowd slowly surrounds Sparkman, while the questioners begin to leave.

Rolling yet again.
>>
>>333848
How will Sparkman get out of this one?

Viktor begins to take off his coat to join the crowd, and Sparkman's defense. One man, armed with a trophy hits Sparkman straight in the jaw, knocking him into a woman, who hits Sparkman straight in the head with her fist. Sparkman is knocked on the ground, blood dripping from his mouth...

Eisenhower "The Eliminator" is watching the exits to make sure no elven assassins come out of the woodworks.

...Rolling to see if the Sparkinator can get out of this.

Place your bets on who'll win this battle?

>Viktor and the Crowd.
>Sparkinator.
>The Elves.
>>
>>333867
>Sparkinator.
Nothing against Victor, but Sparkman seems pull through when it counts.
>>
>>333867
I can tell you who'll lose, the Elves if they turn up!
>>
>>333867
>>Sparkinator.
Sorry, Viktor. You have kinda thrown us under the bus.
>>
The crowd begins kicking at Sparkman, but parts way for Viktor who... Helps him up?

"Come on man. Communism isn't the way. What would the founding fathers think?"

Sparkman, heavily injuried from the crowd's assault, pauses for a moment.

"...The founding fathers would do anything to fight against fascism... Or communism."

Sparkman proceeds to punch Viktor in the gut, and the crowd cheers, and turns on Viktor.

It seems the tables have turned... Keep placing those bets.
>>
Rolled 12, 1 = 13 (2d20)

Viktor is knocked to the ground, and he roars in anger. The crowd quickly backs away, and Viktor stands up.

"Such a low blow from a man like yourself! Any coward can do that and call themselves a man... But... I'm the bigger man. I'll offer you a chance to walk out of this one, Sparkman."

"Hell no. We will end this here, and now."

"...Very well. Prepare yourself."

The Final Battle has begun between Sparkman and Viktor.
>>
Rolled 20, 17 = 37 (2d20)

>>333943

Sparkman readies himself for battle, and Viktor charges. Sparkman readies himself to block... And a sickening crack is heard, Viktor's punched the man straight in the head, twisting it to the left and sending Sparkman flying at least fifteen feet, and off the stage.

Viktor laughs.

"Is that all you can do? What happened to the Sparkman I fought last time?"

You see Sparkman slowly rise up, but Viktor jumps off the stage, crashing into ground with a mighty thud.

Rolling.
>>
Rolled 19, 19 = 38 (2d20)

>>333954
Sparkman has shifted into... A half-Dragon form, ripping off his shirt in the process and stands up, and grabs Viktor by the head. Viktor roars, and prepares to charge, but Sparkman redirects his charge straight into the wall, causing him to be dazed.

Sparkman proceeds to walk closer to Viktor.

So anons, if Viktor gets elected, what will you look forward to most?
>>
>>333972
I'd honestly prefer Sparkman. He seems like a fucking rad dude.
>>
Rolled 10, 3 = 13 (2d20)

>>333998
to be honest anon, Sparkman pretty much has won judging from the states. Though if Viktor wins this, it'll be pretty much a tie.

Viktor and Sparkman wrestle it out in the center of the stage, neither of them seem to be winning ground. Viktor however, has the strength to beat the deadlock, and grabs Sparkman and lifts him over his head.

Rolling.
>>
>>334017
I'm getting the vibe that you made sparkman trump if he was a liberal.
>>
We should have never given Sparkman the mutagen. He is clearly an abuser when it comes to it. Should've left him to die.
>>
File: Close Election.jpg (906 KB, 4730x2750)
906 KB
906 KB JPG
>>334017
Viktor brings Sparkman down to the ground, and crushes him. Sparkman seems to have lost consciousness, and Viktor stands up, brushes his shirt off, and gets his coat. He turns to his microphone.

"And that, is how we deal with communists in the United States of America."

He however, goes over to help Sparkman up again. You doubt it's because Viktor likes him.

The debate is over, and it seems Viktor has won it, making this election very close.

If any American fags can tell me who's in the lead judging from this map, tell me.

Now research time.


Choose two, and get one free tech from your new advisor.

>Millitary-grade Dragonfuel. (HARD)
>Races
>Enhanced Anti-Air
>Enhanced Anti-Tank
>Mutations
>Propaganda (+2 from Victor)
>Special Forces
>Counterespionage
>Navy
>Education
>Religion.
>Agriculture
>Medicine
>Magic (+2 from having the University of Moscow)
>Infantry Weaponry
>Vehicles
>Industrial Equipment
>Political Theories.
>Write-In

>>334050
Honestly, I kind of started him out as a Bernie Sanders clone. Then it just became the Wall Man's personality.
>>
>>334056
>Millitary-grade Dragonfuel. (HARD)Use the free tech for this
>Industrial Equipment
>Medicine
>>
>>334056
By the way, for anyone wondering why it turned Red so fast, it's because Anti-Communism was a huge thing at the time, so Sparkman kind of fucked up on that question.
Or so I gather from Wikipedia.
>>
>>334056
>>Education
>>Medicine
>>Political Theories.
>>
>>334056
>Races
>Education
>Political theories
>>
Looks like Medicine, Political Theories, Education.

Writing.
>>
Back.

>Limited Vaccination: Attempt to invent vaccinations in Sweden.
>Draconic Medicine: Attempt to create a "wonder" drug using mutagen.
>Doctor Schools: Attempt to modernize Swedish Healthcare, instead of relying on old-fashioned physicians.
>>
>>334134
>Draconic Medicine: Attempt to create a "wonder" drug using mutagen.
>>
>>334134
>>Draconic Medicine: Attempt to create a "wonder" drug using mutagen.
>>
>>334134
>>Draconic Medicine: Attempt to create a "wonder" drug using mutagen.
also victor is probably winning because he has like all the southern states and a lot of northern ones
>>
Draconic Medicine wins... Now what will this drug be?

>It will (slowly) mutate the taker into a plain dragonblood, and grant limited resistance to diseases and injury.
>It will (slowly) mutate the taker into a plainhalf-dragon, and grant resistance to diseases and injury.
>It will mutate the taker's immune system to be more effective, though it will grant very little resistance in the end.
>>
>>334158
>It will (slowly) mutate the taker into a plainhalf-dragon, and grant resistance to diseases and injury.
>>
>>334158
>>It will (slowly) mutate the taker into a plain dragonblood, and grant limited resistance to diseases and injury.
>>
>>334158
>>It will (slowly) mutate the taker into a plainhalf-dragon, and grant resistance to diseases and injury.
>>
Half dragon wins, and now for Education.

>Patriotic Education: Teach the children of the Fatherland about their noble history and background. This will make Patriotism and Nationalism further increase.
>Mixed Education: Teach children of all races together, rather then apart. This could go well or bad, depending on what happens.
>Army Training: Teach children the basics of warfare, whether they like it or not.
>>
>>334193
>Mixed Education: Teach children of all races together, rather then apart. This could go well or bad, depending on what happens.
Except the elves, everyone is better than the elves.
>>
>>334193
>Mixed Education: Teach children of all races together, rather then apart. This could go well or bad, depending on what happens

Except for the elves.
>>
Whelp, roll me a 2d20+4 for your actions.
>>
Rolled 16, 15 + 4 = 35 (2d20 + 4)

>>334211
>>
Rolled 12, 3 + 4 = 19 (2d20 + 4)

>>334211
>>
>>334214
16+4=20
15+4=19

Your education systems is a great success, and other races besides human will adopt better to your culture.

Your medicine is great, and slow-acting, with no draw backs... If you want, you can dispense it out to the human populace.

>Yes, dispense this out to the general populace.
>No, hold back on it.
>Put a warning on it, that'll turn you into a half-dragon.
>Write-In
>>
>>334234
>Yes, dispense this out to the general populace.
>Put a warning on it, that'll turn you into a half-dragon.
>>
>>334234
>>No, hold back on it.
Goddamn it, let's not mutate everybody.
>>
>>334240
It'll only mutate humans, keep in mind.
>>
>>334240
I agree... it should be a last line of defense and a go to for military treatment
>>
Waiting fifteen minutes.
>>
>>334234
>Yes, dispense this out to the general populace.

Particularly in Sweden, Denmark and the Swedish parts of Finland.
>>
So since more anons want to mutate, I'll narrow it down.

>Disperse it ONLY to the military.
>Disperse it to the populace near Stockholm.
>Disperse it empire-wide.

Also...
Disperse with warning labels?
>Yes.
>No.
>Vague, warning labels.
>>
>>334297
>Disperse it to the populace near Stockholm.
>Vague, warning labels.
>>
>>334297
>Disperse it empire-wide.
>Yes.
>>
>>334297
>>Disperse it ONLY to the military.
>Yes.
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>334301
Switching to empire wide
>>
>>334297
>Disperse it ONLY to the military.
>Yes
>>
Empire wide then, along with warning labels.

Going to roll for how effective this is.

Now, anons... For Political Theory.

>Collectivist Thought: You can further centralize the nation.
>National Delegation: You can delegate further.
>Statehood: You can delegate territories to states, which manage themselves.
>>
>>334341
>Collectivist Thought: You can further centralize the nation.
>>
>>334341
>National Delegation: You can delegate further.
>>
Waiting four more minutes.
>>
>>334341
>>Statehood: You can delegate territories to states, which manage themselves.
Makes conquering easier.
>>
Rolled 3 (1d3)

Rolling.

1=Collect
2=National
3=Statehood.

So far, the medicine program has been a great success. Most of the middle-class has become Half-Dragons.

Now, with research done, you turn your glance to your children.
What do with them?

>Observe them, and figure out their personalities from a distance.
>...Fuck it, see if you can take them somewhere... Like that monument you built in the city center.
>Take them to a movie theater, you never did see what a movie is.
>Write-In
>>
>>334388
>Take them to a movie theater, you never did see what a movie is.
>>
>>334388
>>Take them to a movie theater, you never did see what a movie is.
We gotta find our parents soon. We've got enough time for it, it seems.
>>
>>334388
>Observe them, and figure out their personalities from a distance.
>>
You decide to take your kids to a "movie theater". After clearing stuff up with the clerk, (mostly you trying to stop him from reciting the national anthem in front of you... In Draconic. Quite entertaining for a teenager.)

You go inside, and notice that Basil, is rather well... He doesn't like it. He's either bored, or indifferent.

"What's wrong, Basil?"

"We're wasting time, father We could be doing something productive, like help someone rather then waste time at a movie theater."

Actions.

>All work and no play makes one a dull boy. (Basil will not get a personality trait.)
>Good on you for your diligence, Basil.
(Basil gets Industrious.)
>
>Write-In
>>
>>334416
>Good on you for your diligence, Basil
>>
Waiting four more minutes.
>>
>>334416
Good on you
>>
"Good on you, Basil."

He nods.

Your small posse enters the movie theater, and gets front row seats after some college students willingly gave it up for you. It seems propaganda DOES work after all.
You sit down.
Who will you watch over?

>Victoria.
>Basil.
>Joan.
>Sven
>>
>>334468
>Victoria.

Victoria and Basil are Elizabeth's kids and Sven and Joan the Danish princesses right?
>>
>>334479
Yep.
>>
You decide to watch Victoria this time. She, throughout the movie, seems to share something with Julius. As in, a rather proud look on her face, and a dignified tone. She also seems to enjoy using "big words".

>Encourge her. (Victoria gets the personality trait Cultured.
>Tell her to knock it off. (Victoria doesn't get the personality trait.
>Use swear words around her, maybe she'll use the way YOU talk. (Victoria gets Sailor Tongue.)
>Write-In
>>
>>334497
>Encourge her. (Victoria gets the personality trait Cultured.
>>
>>334497
>Encourge her. (Victoria gets the personality trait Cultured.
>>
You encourge her, and she has recieved the Culture Trait to boot. Whatever that means.

Towards the end of the movie, you notice Sven is complaining how the man isn't fighting or whatever. It seems he has gained the Battle-Loving trait, like Viktor.

>Yeah... No. (Sven will not get the Battle-Loving personality trait.)
>Ignore it. (Sven will get the Battle-Loving trait.)
>...Perhaps you can show him a few tricks? Of course, this might damage the movie theater.(Sven will get the Berserker Trait and Mutation.)
>>
>>334526
>>Ignore it. (Sven will get the Battle-Loving trait.)
>>
>>334526
>...Perhaps you can show him a few tricks? Of course, this might damage the movie theater.(Sven will get the Berserker Trait and Mutation.)
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d2)

Tie.

1=Ignore it.
2=Encourage it.
>>
Well... Uh. Roll me a 1d20+15 for... Fuck it, this roll is pretty much a formality. Roll me a 1d20+15 for how much damage you deal to the movie theater.

Press F to pay respects.
>>
Rolled 14 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>334577
F
>>
One more laddies.
>>
>>334591
14+15=29

Overwhelming Success!

"Kid, if you love battle so much... Why don't I show you some tricks?"

Sven looks up at you, confused.

You unleash a roar, which sends most of the audiance running, and you turn back to Sven.

"Now kid, let's hear you roar."

He roars. There is, for some reason. No noise.

"Try again."

He tries, and yet no loud roar or anything like that... Come to think of it, you've never actually heard him talk.

"Come on kid, give me something."

He takes a chair and rips it off it's stand.

"There you go, like a true warrior. Now, see how far you can toss it."

He whirls and and tosses it four feet. You facepalm.

"It doesn't work like that Sven, unless you want to fall over... Let Dad show you how it's done."

You easily rip of a chair, and throw it through the roof. It dissapears into the heavens.

"...That'll ruin someone's day. Now you try, Sven."

He rips off another chair, but misses the roof and sends it hurling through the door, and you hear screams.

"...Better. Now, don't forget to froth at the mouth."

He looks at you confused, yet again.
"How does one do that?"

Holy shit, he actually spoke for once.

"Easy. Just think of something that gets you angry."

He nods. Then starts frothing at the mouth like a true barbarian. He rips off a chair and goes running towards the concession stand. That will show those overcharging pricks.

Basil look at you and says "...Why are you teaching Sven to be a warrior, but not me?"

Learned a new personality trait: Silent.

Actions.

>...Why not both? (Basil will also become a Barbarian, and a beserker.)
>...No. The voices in my head command it.
>Write-In
>>
>>334624
Oh shit, I don't know if we should have two barbarian sons. They might try to kill each other or some shit. I'd say hold off for now. Basil could end up being more useful.
>...No. The voices in my head command it.
>>
>>334624
>>...Why not both? (Basil will also become a Barbarian, and a beserker.)
>>
Waiting fifteen more minutes.
>>
>>334624
>...No. The voices in my head command it.
Maybe say some shit like "You can be a true soldier instead" and give HIM battle loving
>>
>>334659
This
>>
Rolled 2 (1d2)

Rolling.

1=Why not both?
2=Nope.
>>
"No, but you can fight like a soldier instead."

"...That isn't what I asked for. What I asked for, specifically, was to be trained as a barbarian. Not as a soldier."

It seems your son is awfully alert about social encounters.

New Personality Trait discovered: Aware.

"...Well. I suppose when we get home I'll teach you something, alright?"

"...Very well."

You head back home with your family, and it is now time for INDUSTRY!

Actions.

>Set up new national industries!
>Encourage foreign industry!
>Encourage local capitalists!
>Write-In
>>
>>334735
>Encourage foreign industry!
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>334735
Foreign.
>>
>>334735
>>Set up new national industries!
if we make business we wont get fucked by foreign ones when we inevitably invade them
>>
>>334757
Changing to national.
>>
National Industry offers.

Choose one.

>A Yuan-Ti wants to drill for Oil in Norway, and is offering you quite a bit of money. (+1 Million. Get $5,000 per turn.)
>A Lycanthrope wants to set up a lumber mill in Finland. (+$45,000, get $10,000 per turn.)
>A (now) Half-Dragon wants to merchandise you as children toys, so long as you construct the factory. (-$60,00-, get $15,000 per turn.)
>A Human wants to construct a firearms factory in Stockholm. (+15,000, get +$2,000 per turn.)
>A Dwarf wants to build a mine in Moscow. (+5,000, get +15,000 per turn.)
>>
>>334773
>A Dwarf wants to build a mine in Moscow. (+5,000, get +15,000 per turn.)
Dwarves Industry is best industry
>>
You send a letter of notice to the Dwarf, authorizing his business.

The month is over. I'll see you guys tomorrow anons.
>>
So, quick question guys, since I cannot sleep, and I like seeing (You)

If we were using the D&D Alignment Chart, where would you put Renexizious, and where you would put his kids.
>>
>>334872
hmm
Renexizious would be Chaotic Neutral maybe bordering evil...
Viktor .. Lawful Neutral?
>>
>>334872
Renexizious is neutral evil, no doubt about it.
>>
I`m on mobile, so yeah.

After the voices in your head say your evil (or leaning towards it at the very least), you decide to implement that whole statehood thing... Or do you?

A more centralized nation will turn this quest towards focusing more on the nation, rather then Renexizious`s personal life. A more delegated nation will focus more on Renexizious`s daily life.

Choices.
>Remain Centralized... The nation comes first.
>Grant statehood and get more free time... You haven't really spoken to your kids besides the movie theater.
>Centralize more... You are the state, and vassals are redundant anyways.
>>
>>335881
>>Remain Centralized... The nation comes first.
>>
>>335881
>Grant statehood and get more free time... You haven't really spoken to your kids besides the movie theater.
>>
>>335881
>Centralize more... You are the state, and vassals are redundant anyways.
>>
>>335887
This
>>
>>335881
>>Grant statehood and get more free time... You haven't really spoken to your kids besides the movie theater.
>>
>>335881
>Grant statehood and get more free time... You haven't really spoken to your kids besides the movie theater.
>>
You have decentralized, and you have started cutting up parts of the Empire into states. Now of course... Who will govern them?

States to give out.
Lativan Estonia
Italy
France
Iceland

Appoint who?

>Appoint one of your kids to rule a State.
>Appoint a friend to rule a state.
>Appoint Reviere to rule France
>Appoint a general to rule a state.
>Write In
>>
>>335919
>Appoint one of your kids to rule a State.
>>
>>335921
Just saying, choose a kid and choose a state.
>>
>>335919
>>Appoint Reviere to rule France
>>
>>335919
>>Appoint Reviere to rule France
>>335919
>>
>>335919
>Appoint Reviere to rule France
>Have revanaris rule Italy
>Have Charlemagne rule iceland
>Have Julius rule Latvian Estonia
>>
>>335919
reviere to france
charlegmane to italy cause hes the heir and should hold down the center of the catholic world
revenaris to iceland
and julius to
>>
>>335919
>Appoint Reviere to rule France
>Have Charlemagne rule Italy
>Have Revanaris rule Iceland
>Have Julius rule Latvian Estonia
>>
>>335947
>>335953
Seconding this lineup.
>>
Looks like
the appointments are a success!

You send letters of office to your kids, and you feel... Relief. God, well... Actually YOU are God, aren`t you? Maybe you can do something rather then work all the time.

It is currently morning.

>Try to track your parents.
>Talk to one of your kids before they go.
>You heard that Revenaris is bethroded to that Austrian princess... Maybe you can vist?
>You haven't raided a place for a while... You do need some more slavrs after all.
>See if Elizabeth wants to do anything special.
>Hang out with Hans.
>Write In
>>
>>335976
>>Try to track your parents.
Slave raiding later.
>>
>>335976
>Try to track your parents.
>>
>>335976
>>Try to track your parents.
>>
You decide to find your parents. You give Elizabeth a quick kiss on her snout, and fly off.

Where will you go?

>Head to your first lair.
>Head to the human village you lived in for a while.
>Search in the skies!

Also, what form will you be in?
>>
>>336004
>Head to your first lair.
Half-dragon
>>
>>336004
>Head to your first lair.
>Dragon, but in your original dragon size not your 30 story tall form.
>>
>>335976
>Hang out with Hasse before tracking the folks.
gotta get a sense of how our land is laying.
>>
>>336008
Seconding.
>>
>>336008
This.

We are kinda too visible otherwise
>>
Waiting ten more minutes
>>
Nevermind, roll me a 1d20+2
>>
Rolled 14 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>336042
>>
>>336044
Success!

You soar over the skies, and find your old lair, not too far from it, in fact, straight down from the entrance seems to be a small longhouse, with smoke coming from a chimney. Inside your lair however, is flashing lights... Purple, green, and blue.

Where do you investigate first?

>The cabin.
>The lair.
>>
>>336065
>The lair.

Our home is a rave? eh I can live with that.
>>
>>336065
>>The lair.
>>
>>336065
>The lair.
>>
You swoop down outside your old lair... And see a portal. Huh. O. Thw otherside, you see a small human village, in what seems to be Medieval times.
The portal grows as you approach it... Do you go inside it?

>Yes.
>Yes... But change form.
>No.
>>
>>336104
>No.
>>
>>336104
>No
>>
>>336104
>Yes... But change form
>>
>>336104
>>Yes... But change form.
>>
>>336104
>>Yes... But change form.
>>
>>336104
>>No.
>>
You decide against going in, and investigate for further. You find signs of life, a blanket and what seems to be... Plate Armour?

Actions

>Investigate the cabin.
>Investigate outside for whoever the intruder was.
>Enter the portal.
>>
>>336151
>>Investigate the cabin.
>>
Sorry anons, my phone is autistic and refused to update.
>>
>>336151
>Investigate the cabin.

I get the feeling this is a village during the renaissance, if it is then I have an idea as to how this happened...
>>
>>336151
>>Investigate outside for whoever the intruder was.
>>
>>336151
Put on the plate mail
Check out the cabin
Then go into portal and role-play a knight
>>
Wear dat planemail nigguh
>>
>>336168
Mind if I ask what the theory is?
>>
>>336185
probably The dat gold dragon lady who is our scientist
>>
>>336185
My theory is that there are characters in the world, all mystical maybe all dragons, who if we encounter will allow us to travel to either their location and time of birth or just to their time of birth.

>>336189
Correct. I hope I am right because that means there are quite a few more mystic beings to deal with. Or they've died before now. One of the two.
>>
Alright, I'm back.

Looks like investigate the cabin wins.

Your mind has multiable thoughts... First is to put on that armor and call yourself a knight, then bugger off to that village. You admit, it is tempting, although you'd lack a blade and shield. Then again, you could just bitchslap most enemies to death. However, you settle on the sane option for once, and decide to investigate the cabin outside.

You silently stomp down, and go up to what seems to be the front.

Actions.

>Shift down into a different form (specify) and knock.
>Impale the door and open it yourself.
>Demand entrance.
>Write-In
>>
>>336265
>>Shift down into a different form (specify) and knock.
Human.
>>
>>336265
>>Shift down into a different form (specify) and knock.
Dragonblood
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>336265
Can we be a knight after the cabin?
>>
>>336265
>>Just knock.
We can wait outside if needed, but I rather we stay dragon.
>>
>>336289
I'm not holding you back.
>>
Human
Knock on door
>>
>>336296
Can we pull a ragnar and just disappear into the past for while
Let the kids rule for a bit
>>
You shift into human form and knock.

"Who is it, eh?" You hear footsteps towards the door and it opens to an old man, wearing a lumberjack's uniform and with a beard... He reminds you of your father in a sense. You also notice he wears a necklace with a hammer around it, no doubt that of the pagan gods of the north.

Actions.

>...Are you my dad?
>Who the fuck are you?
>So uh, what's a man like you doing this high up in the mountains? Where there is no trees for miles?
>Write-In
>>
>>336331
>>So uh, what's a man like you doing this high up in the mountains? Where there is no trees for miles?
>>
>>336331
>Explain the portal and why I think you're my father
>>
>>336336
>...Are you my dad?
>>
>>336338
DADDY
>>
>>336331
>>So uh, what's a man like you doing this high up in the mountains? Where there is no trees for miles?
>>
>>336331
>>So uh, what's a man like you doing this high up in the mountains? Where there is no trees for miles?
>>
>>336354
>>336346
>>336334
could thor be our dad? OP pls! also seconding
>>
"So.. What's a man like you doing this high up in the mountains. Where there is no trees for miles?"

"...Ain't it obvious? I'm prayin' for me son."

You raise your eyebrow.

"...Son?"

"...I've said too much boy, now tell me... What are you doing on this mountain? You don't look like a honest Asartu."

Actions.

>You were just... Erh. Hiking.
>You were in that cave and found something of interest...
>You're here to worship, clearly.
>...Dad?
>Write-In
>>
>>336374
>...Dad?
>>
>>336374
>>...Dad?
daddy?
also please dont make our dad killus because we're christians... that would suck
>>
>>336374
>dad?
>>
>>336374
>...Dad?
>>336385
If worst comes to worst we could secretly convert, and start plotting the downfall of the catholic faith.
>>
>>336374
>...Dad?
>>
"...Dad?"

A brief silence comes over the two of you.

"...You don't look like my son. He was larger, and didn't have punk-ass white hair like a fucking commie."

"...What hair did he have?"

He goes silent.

"Not yours."

Actions.

>Try to convince him you are in fact, his son. (Charisma)
>...Son of a fucking bitch. Shift in front of him.
>Write-In
>>
>>336400
>>...Son of a fucking bitch. Shift in front of him.
>>
>>336400
>>...Son of a fucking bitch. Shift in front of him.
I knew we should have stuck to being a dragon.
>>
>>336400
>...Son of a fucking bitch. Shift in front of him.
>>
>>336400
>when did your son go missing?
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>336400
>>...Son of a fucking bitch. Shift in front of him.
>>
You shift in front of him... Now I assume Dragon form.

The man bows in front of you, terrified.

"Lo-lord... Have mercy over me! I am but a simple Godi trying to find his only son, not worthy of your attention! Please, spare me from your wrath!"

...Well. That didn't work as you thought it would.

Actions.

>Assure him you won't do that.
>...It seems he doesn't recognize you in dragon form... But he might know something else. Intimidate him with imminent destruction. (Intimidate.)
>See if you can't rekindle some memory of you in him... He must recognize his son, surely. (Charisma).
>Write-In
>>
>>336426
>>See if you can't rekindle some memory of you in him... He must recognize his son, surely. (Charisma).
>>
>>336426
>>See if you can't rekindle some memory of you in him... He must recognize his son, surely. (Charisma).

Also ask when his son went missing
>>
>>336426
>Leave him

He clearly isn't our father since he would've acted differently to a dragon claiming to be his son.
>>
Just keep yelling dad
>>
>>336426
>>See if you can't rekindle some memory of you in him... He must recognise his son, surely. (Charisma).
Ask for details about his son.
>>
Roll me a 1d20+7
>>
Rolled 2 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>336440
>>
Rolled 12 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>336440
>>
Rolled 16 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>336440
>>
>>336444
16+7=23

Great Success.


"Fine then. What did your son look like?"

"...From birth, he was strange. He was marked with white scal... Son?"

He begins to recognize you, and rubs his eyes.

"...By the gods... I thought you were dead."

Actions.

>...So, uh... Who's mom?
>Why the hell are you a pagan?
>Wait... Why did he think you were dead?
>...Take back that comment about my human hair color.
>Shift into human form. (Free)
>Write-In
>>
>>336448
>>...So, uh... Who's mom?
>Wait... Why did he think you were dead?
>>
>>336448
>>Shift into human form. (Free)
>...So, uh Who's Mom?
>>
>>336448
>...So, uh... Who's mom?
>>
"...So... If your my dad, who's mom?"

"...Well, she vanished a day after your birth. I barely got to name ye, and she vanished with that suit of armor she always carried with her."

He seems rather sad, but then looks at you.

"...So Renexizious is what you named yourself?"

"It is, yes."

"Well, I named you Theodir, but I suppose that matters little."

"So... Mind if I come inside then?"

"...Your going to break something. I can barely understand how one would raise you. You could easily devour an entire flock of sheep."

"Oh, right. Well... I suppose I can come inside then."

Actions.

>Shift down to a smaller form. (Specify if Half Dragon, Human, or Dragonblood.)
>No, your good outside.

Also...

>...So why did you think I was dead?
>...Suit of armour? I saw some in my lair up in the cave.
>So what's the family name?
>...Are you pissed off about me being a Christian?
>Do I have any siblings?
>Write-In
>>
>>336448
>..So, uh... Who's mom?
>>336454
Let's Stay as a dragon for now
>>
>>336462
>>No, your good outside.

>...So why did you think I was dead?
>So what's the family name?
>>
>>336462
>Shift down to a smaller form. (Specify if Half Dragon, Human, or Dragonblood.)

>Do I have any siblings?
>>
>>336462
>>No, your good outside.
>>...So why did you think I was dead?
>Do I have any siblings?
>>
>>336462
>Shift down to a smaller form. (Specify if Half Dragon, Human, or Dragonblood.)Half Dragon
>...Are you pissed off about me being a Christian?
>>
>>336462
>>Shift down to a smaller form. (Specify if Half Dragon, Human, or Dragonblood.)
Dragon blood

>...Suit of armour I saw some in my lair up in the cave
>So whats the family name
>Do I have any siblings
>>
>>336470
+1
>>
You shift down to a smaller form. I'm assuming dragonblood because that was the only one specified.

You go inside and your father offers you a tankard of ale. You heartily accept and down it, and you sit at a small table.

"So Dad, just wondering. Why did you think I was dead?" you get up and get another tankard of mead.

"...I haven't seen you in years, and I tracked Kerstiena all over Sweden. I thought you were mauled by bears, or killed by Catholics for... Well. Your scales. Or worse..." He looks down into his drink a little more.

"...Still, just wondering, if I have any siblings?" you sit back down and look at him. He snaps to and looks back up to you, his somewhat sunken expression remaining on him, and he shakes his head.

"No... I was only with Kersteina for a month. It was remarkable... You were born so early, over a comet none the less. The gods blessed your birth, though I know naught why you vanished afterwards."

"So... Uh, what's the family name then?" You drink another tankard of mead... It's damned good to be honest.

"Ah, I was wondering when you'd ask. It's the Thorsonns." His sunken expression turns a little less somber, and a little more proud.

"Thorsonns?"

"Aye. Glorious last name, ain't it?"

Actions.

>...There's a portal up by your old lair... Along with armor.
>...How long have you been looking for me?
>Are you pissed off about me being a Christian?
>So... Are you proud of me?
>I have to go, Dad.
>Write-In
>>
>>336498
>>...There's a portal up by your old lair... Along with armor.
>...How long have you been looking for me?
>>
>>336500
+1
>>
>>336500
Supporting.
>>
>>336500
+1
>>
"Well... How long have you been looking for me?" You give your head a slight tilt, adding prominence to this question.

"Twenty years, until today." He takes a sip of mead and sets it down after answering your question.

"That long?"

"Aye. My search recently led me here, and I was setting up living quarters... So sorry about the poor state of things."

"That's not a problem, don't worry. Now... I think you should know something."

"What is it?"

"Up in the cave, there is a suit of armour, along with what seems to be a portal."

"Armour... Strange. I don't think it would be Karsteina's armor. What was it specifically?"

"Plate armor."

He shakes his head.

"No. She wore a mail suit and haubrek, she also had a strange accent, like a woman from Spain."

"Strange indeed... Should we check this out together?"

He sighs.

"...I just found you, after twenty years of searching, fighting through the damned winter. I would give you anything for you stay here but a minute longer, but since it's together... I suppose. Don't expect me to fight well either, my legs haven't aged well."

Actions.

>No time like the present to investigate strange holes in the fabric of reality.
>...Tell him to get a suit of armor or clothes that look similar to that of a peasant or something.
>No... You'll go in alone.
>No, you'd rather just talk to him for now.
>...You could fix the whole leg part... Some mutagen will help. And a kitchen.
>Write-In
>>
>>336500
along with "so what are you? because you've been alive for quite some time I take it?"
>>
>>336535
>...You could fix the whole leg part... Some mutagen will help. And a kitchen.
>>
>>336535
>>...Tell him to get a suit of armor or clothes that look similar to that of a peasant or something.
>>
>>336535
>>...You could fix the whole leg part... Some mutagen will help. And a kitchen.
>>336535
>>
>>336535
>>...You could fix the whole leg part... Some mutagen will help. And a kitchen.
SCIENCE!
>>
>>336535
>...You could fix the whole leg part... Some mutagen will help. And a kitchen.
>>
"...I could help you with the leg and age part."

"How? Are you some sort of magi or something?"

"...In a sense. I'll need your kitchen."

Will you be specific about what your about to do?

>Not at all!
>Of course, he's your damned father..

Also... What mutagen are you using?

>Dragonblood (Risky)
>Half-Dragon MK2
>Half Dragon Mk3
>Half-Dragon Shapeshift. (HARD)
>>
>>336560
>Of course, he's your damned father..
>Half-Dragon Shapeshift. (HARD)
>>
>>336560
>>Of course, he's your damned father..
>>Half-Dragon Shapeshift. (HARD)
Nothing but the best for our father.
>>
>>336566
>>336571
+1
>>
"So... I'm going to make you a half-dragon in order to fix your legs."

He seems to consider it for a few moments.

"...Fine. I suppose I'd be alright with this. Does it hurt?"

"Like a motherfucker."

"Great, I needed another test to Thor, for my pain will be like thunder, won't it?"

"Most likely."

You decide to create the Shapeshift, which may be a tad bit hard in these conditions.

Roll me a 1d20+6
>>
Rolled 7 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>336596
Inb4 we get a 1 and turn dad into an abomimation
>>
Rolled 17 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>336596
He's a tough man, always has been. He'll turn out okay.
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>336610
17+6=23

Great Success!

The makeshift syringe goes into his arm, and he struggles in pain... Due to it's makeshift quality... I'm going to roll for his mutation.

Place your bets that he's going to get Large, on a mutagen which already makes him quite big.
>>
>>336618
Did we just make our dad a fuckin full blown dragon?
>>
>>336618
100 is a good one right? Right?
>>
File: Jango.jpg (82 KB, 1200x760)
82 KB
82 KB JPG
Rolled 47, 96 = 143 (2d100)

>>336618
Your fucking shitting me, he gets two mutations, both of which are stronger then usual...
Rolling.
>>
>>336624
That would be amazing!
>>
>>336628
...
I'm fucking dying here, anons... Can you guess what two mutations your dad got?

Protip: One is large, one is not large, but is similar to it.

I regret randomizing the sheet today.
>>
>>336653
He's going to need special made pants, isin't he.
>>
>>336653
>one is not large, but is similar to it.
fat?
>>
>>336653
Nice, being /fit/ must be a part of the family blood.
>>
Your father has gotten Large, and Heavy . Since it's stronger then usual, it is now Very Large, and Extremely Heavy (No, not fat. Just heavy).
Since Large was already on the mutation basis... He is now huge.

Fuck my rolling.

Your father begins transforming, and becomes more compact, his arm muscles becoming muscular, growing further muscle on the muscle. He's rather "short" in a sense, but he seems a little squashed. He's large, very large, not to mention very heavy and, extremely muscular. It'd take an army of half-dragons to lift him up. Luckily however, he lifts himself up, and you notice he has red scales. You also note that his clothes won't fit him, and you promptly make a mental note to get him some fitting clothes later.

"I feel great!" he yells out to no one in particular.

"Dad, don't stand up ye-"

Your father stands up, and crushes the floorboards with ease. Jesus Christ, he must weigh MORE then you possibly.

He shifts into human form, which has also become extremely muscular.

Actions.

>...Well, time to get to that portal.
>...How about no, and just talk to your dad about something.
>Write-In
>>
>>336700
>...Well, time to get to that portal.
Did he just surpass our max half dragon size?
>>
>>336700
>>...Well, time to get to that portal.
>>
>>336700
>...Well, time to get to that portal.

Did we ever find out the personality of Joan?
>>
>>336704
...No, that would crush the building. He's 36'4' however, and I would like to point out... Weighs more then a 20,300 ton dragon.

Yeah.
>>
>>336720
You should probably tone it back a bit, he should by all logic have his own gravitational field at this point...
>>
You head towards the portal, and you note that armour is still there. Your father has found a second pair of robes... You could put on the armour.

Actions.

>Yes, you will be Sir Renexizious... You wonder if there's any fine damsels in distress around.
>...No, that's childish.
>Give it to your Dad.
>Write-In
>>
>>336720
That makes me wonder if he'd be able to compete with rens strength. Considering if we bring him home literally all the flooring is going to get ruined with him having a leisurely stroll.
>>
>>336729

>...No, that's childish.
>>
>>336728
...Never.

>>336731
Not really in human form, but one cannot help but think where all that excess mass goes to.
>>
>>336732
Fuck you
>>336729
Put dat fucking armour on...
RiGHT FUCKING NOW
>>
>>336735
>Not really in human form, but one cannot help but think where all that excess mass goes to.
he's dick?
>>
>>336729
>Yes, you will be Sir Renexizious... You wonder if there's any fine damsels in distress around.
Lets teach our dad magic and he can fulfill the wizard portion then we find a rouge and we've got a dnd party.
>>
>>336720
After translating that to human measurments of meters I hava calculated, that if Dad is about five meters wide at the shoulders, then a cubic meter of his body weights about 200 tons, which is 200g/cm^3, or 18 times the density of lead or 11 times the density of uranium.
>>
>>336746
His blood is probably heavier than mercury by about an order of magnitude
>>
>>336729
>>Yes, you will be Sir Renoxizious... You wonder if there's any fine damsels in distress around.
We can always ditch the armor if we feel like it.
>>
You put on the armor, it's a little ill-fitting and rusted... And you go through the portal.

On the other side, is a village in the distance, your dad comes through and of course, the fucking portal closes behind you. Shit.

You decide thy must have a knightly name! What will thy title be, knight?

>...Stop with the fucking accent. Your just Renexizious.
>...Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!
>Sir Stockholm!
>Sir Renexizious!
>They will fear you as... the Dragonknight.
>Write-In for KNIGHTLY Names.

Also, for thine village in the distance... What shall a knight such as yourself do?

>...Fucking scout it out, you aren't a stupid knight.
>You are a man. Go into town, unafraid of what might happen.
>...Shift into dragon form and demand their surrender. Sweden will expand in a SECOND dimension!
>Write-In

>>336746
...It's magic, I ain't gotta explain shit.
>>
>>336755
>>...Stop with the fucking accent. Your just Renexizious.
>...Fucking scout it out, you aren't a stupid knight.
>>
>>336755
>>Write-In for KNIGHTLY Names.
Hans, the Dragonknight
>...Shift into dragon form and demand their surrender. Sweden will expand in a SECOND dimension!
>>
>>336755
>Sir Renexizious!
>...Fucking scout it out, you aren't a stupid knight.
>>
>>336755
>>...Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight
>> scout dat village for white wimminz
>>
>>336755
The white knight, of no relation to the black knight or the grey knight's or the rainbow knights of fabulous-ness.
>>
>>336764
forgot the vote options;

>Write-In for KNIGHTLY Names.

>...Fucking scout it out, you aren't a stupid knight.
>>
>>336763
+1
>>
You have named yourself... Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!

You approach the village cautiously. It seems to be a village of rather short humans... Like halflings.

Actions.

>Approach the halflings.
>...Do those gentlemen have damsels in distress? You shall look for a bounty on some fearsome dragon or something that kidnaps womenfolk!
>...Demand their surrender to the glorious Empire of Sweden!
>...Ask if any of them have seen your mother.
>...You want food. See if they have a tavern or something.
>Write-In

I am going to have too much fun with this.
>>
>>336778
>>Approach the halflings.
>>
>>336778
>Approach the halflings.
>...Ask if any of them have seen your mother.
Let's focus on the task at hand.
>>
You approach one of the halflings, and they try to speak to you in... English?

"Tally-ho gent! Would you be interested in buying some Buttersmooth Butter Merchandise and FUN!? I assure you, my prices are fair and balanced, with only a %150 mark up, and with cheese of the highest quality! That is to say, no quality!"
He laughs.

"You seem troubled, friend, how can a friend help you out this fine evening?"

What? Did you.... Did you stumble on a village of Jewish midgets or British midgets? Or both?

Actions.

>Ask if any of them have seen your mother.
>What in the seven hells is butter merchandise?
>...You suddenly want to leave this village.
>Write-In
>>
>>336795
>Write-In:Go in dragon form and demand they give up their butter!
>>
Oh shit, I forgot you guys had a thing for butter.

Rip halflings
we hardly knew ye
>>
>>336795
>>What in the seven hells is butter merchandise?
>>
>>336795
>>Ask if any of them have seen your mother.
Meanwhile, barely restrain ourselves from doing this. >>336798
>>
You barely restrain yourself against demanding their butter... All of it... The silky, smooth butter... You salivate slightly, and your dad looks at you slightly concerned. You shake yourself from a daydream of you swimming a large pool of butter just in time to answer.

"...Erh, no. What the hell is butter merchandise?"

"You don't know about the Buttersmooth's family pride?"

Hmm... Butter.

"Erh... No."

"Well, in eons past, our great, great, great grandfathers used an enchanted butter churn to produce vast amounts of butter to feed countless civilians during the wars against the Vampire Counts of Sylvana!"

"Oh. Well then, have you seen my mother?"

He looks up at you, confused.

"How am I supposed to know, Knight?"

Actions.

>Well, was she a dragon?
>...It's clear they didn't know anything. Besides, your mother might just be human. Ask if there is any human settlements around.
>...Vampire Counts? It sounds like a worthy quest to go after!
>...Demand ALL the butter. And the butter churn.
>Write-In
>>
>>336814
>>...Vampire Counts? It sounds like a worthy quest to go after!
>>
>>336814
>...Demand ALL the butter. And the butter churn.
If we get the churn we get a neverending supply of butter
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
>>336814
>>Well, was she a dragon?
>>
>>336814
>...Demand ALL the butter. And the butter churn.
>>
>>336818
>>336830
Combine these two, we turn into a dragon, ask if they have seen another dragon and then demand ALL THE BUTTER!
>>
"...Well then. Give me the butter churn, and all the butter your village has."

He smiles.

"I suppose we can come to a dea-"

"I wasn't asking nicely. I am demanding this."

"Bu-"

"...You honestly want to fight a dragon?"

"You don't look like a dragon, you crazy man!"

Actions.

>Shift into one. You want butter. Also sacrifices of personal belongings and loved ones. (Intimidate)
>Shift into a dragon, but just demand butter.
>Bitch slap this guy and demand butter. (Intimidate.)
>...Shift into one and eat this guy. He might taste like butter.
>Write-In
>>
>>336837
>Shift into a dragon, but just demand butter.
>>
>>336837
>>Shift into one. You want butter. Also sacrifices of personal belongings and loved ones. (Intimidate)
>>
>>336837
>>Shift into a dragon, but just demand butter.
>>
Quick question... How big do you want to be in dragon form? Full sized or just as small as possible?
>>
>>336837
Same as my last post. >>336833
>>
>>336849
Full
>>
>>336849
MAX SIZED, NOTHING WILL GET IN OUR WAY FOR THE QUEST FOR BUTTER!!!
>>
>>336849
Start full sized and then scale down as they soothe our anger with buttery goodness.
>>
>>336858
Seconded.
>>
>>336837
>>Shift into a dragon, but just demand butter.
>>
You shift suddenly into full size, terrifying the village. (And villages for miles around.)

"Mortals! Bring me butter, or I w-"

You realize your stepping in squashed halfling. Oh. Right. He was infront of you.

"Mortals! Bring me as much butter as your insignifgent village can produce!"

The village panics, and starts carrying out platters of butter to sate you. You hear a comment from your dad.

"...I can only wonder if you got the butter hunger from my wife."

You sate yourself on buttery goodness... While gradually shrinking down with every platter. And demand more. The villagers panic, realizing they don't have any butter left to give you... Save their own furniture and belongings. And that butter churn.

Actions.

>...Unleash a roar and demand MORE! Your buttery reign of terror will last millennia! (Intimidate.)
>Squash some peasants, and demand the Butter Churn.
>Eh, your good. Shift back into Knight form.
>Write-In
>>
>>336874
>...Unleash a roar and demand MORE! Your buttery reign of terror will last millennia! (Intimidate.)
>Squash some peasants, and demand the Butter Churn.
>>
>>336874
>>...Unleash a roar and demand MORE! Your buttery reign of terror will last millennia! (Intimidate.)
By more this means the churn, right?
>>
>>336877
Yep. It also means the last of the butter in the village.

I can see how some anons would see Renexizious as neutral evil at this point.
>>
>>336874
>Write-In
>While still in dragon form ask if any of them has seen your mother.
>>
>>336874
>...Unleash a roar and demand MORE! Your buttery reign of terror will last millennia! (Intimidate.)
>>
>>336881
I like how the only villages we properly raided up to this point we only took butter and a couple women. Nothing shiny, just butter and women.
>>
>>336887
Now your taking butter churns.

I also think you raided for slaves once. So yeah.

Roll me a 1d20+9 for intimidation.
>>
Rolled 12 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>336894
>>
Rolled 12 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>336894
>>
>>336896
12+9=21

Great Success!

"Bring me MORE! And I may yet spare your pitiful hamlet!"

They squirm off and bring you more butter, along with the churn. They effectively get you down to half size... You could demand some more things.

Feel free to take any of these.

>Keep with tradition. Demand womenfolk, though you doubt you'll actually do anything with them. It's just really PR.
>Eh, demand slaves.
>Demand gold.
>Just leave, your pretty much good at this point.
>...Freeze the village. You didn't like them anyways.
>Write-In
>>
>>336903
>Just leave, your pretty much good at this point.
Also ask if they've seen any other dragons.
>>
>>336903
Women,
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
>>336903
>Demand gold.
>Ask if they have seen your mother
>>
>>336903
>>Keep with tradition. Demand womenfolk, though you doubt you'll actually do anything with them. It's just really PR.
Traditions are important.
>>
>>336903
>>Just leave, your pretty much good at this point.
>>
Traditions it is.

"...I'll have your women folk. And I believe that's it."

The villagers nod, and bring out a few females. You snatch them and put them on your back.

"Oh, would any of you have seen another dragon besides me?"

They all shake their heads. Damn it.

You fly off to a mountain range, careful to not attract suspicion. You note that there is quite a few human settlements by a river, but luckily none seem to have seen you.

What do with women folk?

>...Just let them go back home once you get an appropriate distance away.
>...Slaves? Slaves.
>You lack your wife in this dimension, so you doubt she'll mind if you lay with some women without her.
>Write-In

By the way, your father is riding on your back in human form, so don't worry about your spine shattering.
>>
>>336917
>>...Just let them go back home once you get an appropriate distance away.
>>
>>336917
>...Slaves? Slaves.
>>
>>336917
>...Just let them go back home once you get an appropriate distance away.
In theory if we encounter any behemoths could we just drop our father on their backs and oneshot them if he transforms midfall?
>>
>>336922
Slavs
>>
>>336923
...Problem is, is that your father will go squish as well.
>>
Waiting fifteen more minutes.
>>
>>336917
>>...Just let them go back home once you get an appropriate distance away.
>>
>>336917
>>...Slaves? Slaves.
>>
So just wondering why you guys don't want slaves, or do want slaves. Just kinda want to hear why you want to enslave people, or not.
>inb4 the QM is being a moral fag
>>
>>336948
Dont we still have around 100-150 yuan ti slaves right? We kinda have enough unless we freed them at some point.
>>
>>336948
>shrug
Feels it fits the whole dragon thing.
>>
>>336948
They'll do our work and collect our seed, as we will it. They're very useful.
>>
>>336948
Specifically, I wanna fuck them.
>>
>>336957
Eh, it depends on your perspective of "enough".

Right now, most of the palace staff has been replaced by slaves or direct servants, so yeah. I suppose if you took a few more villages slaves you'll start replacing agarian work with slaves and stuff, which frees up most of the populace to do industrial work.
>>
>>336948
I have few moral problems with slavery, I generally make the assumption that our slaves are kept in good living conditions? Maybe not tv's and computers but good beds, warm rooms and filling food?
>>
>>336973
Yeah, Renexizious from my point of view isn't That Guy, if he was That Guy he would of destroyed the village, or he would be raiding his own villages, or basically being a dick. So I presume yes.

Unless you get elven slaves.[/spoilers]
>>
>>336977
Now there's a thought.
>>
Last call for voting on slaves or not, gonna be back in five minutes. I don't want a fucking tie.
>>
>>336977
I'm just picturing elven slaves working the fields with a half dragon holding a whip keeping them in line
>>
>>336917
>>...Slaves? Slaves.
>>
>>336986
Meanwhile all the other slaves beat the shit out of them for the Empire once they head to bed.

It's hard work, being an elf.Citation Goddamn Needed
>>
Looks like Slaves win.

"Alright, listen up. I'll provide you with bed and protection so long as you serve me."

The peasant girls eagerly accept, most likely either because of your handsome looks, or the fact that your stomach happened to growl at the same time. Your father nods in approval, and starts directing them to set up limited shelter.

It is now midday.

You have 14x Halfling Slaves.

Actions.

>...Raid a few more villages.
>Go down to a human settlement and ask around, maybe you can get a job or something.
>...Try to find the capital of this Kingdom or whatever it is.
>Write-In

Also, what form do you want to be in while searching?

>Human. (The least suspicious, but the most slow.)
>Half-Dragon. (Moderately suspicious, and still slow.)
>Dragon. (Extremely suspicious, but fast.)
>Dragonblood. (Slightly suspicious, but also slow.)
>>
>>336998
>>...Try to find the capital of this Kingdom or whatever it is.
>Human. (The least suspicious, but the most slow.)
Looks like this'll take a while.
>>
>>336998
>...Try to find the capital of this Kingdom or whatever it is.
>Dragon. (Extremely suspicious, but fast.)
>>
>>336998
>...Raid a few more villages.
>Human. (The least suspicious, but the most slow.)
>>
>>336998
>>...Try to find the capital of this Kingdom or whatever it is.
>Dragon. (Extremely suspicious, but fast.)
We're here to find our mother, unless she's hiding from us making noise is the best way to to this.
>>
Waiting five more minutes.
>>
You decide to find the capital. As a dragon of course.

Roll me a 1d20+2 for surveying.
>>
Rolled 16 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>337029
>>
Rolled 4 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>337029
From the sky!
>>
Rolled 8 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>337029
>>
>>337031
16+2=18

Great Success!

You fly above the cloud layer, and spot thousands upon thousands of lights. It seems you've found the human capital, complete with a large castle and walls.

Actions.

>Actually... Make that YOUR city and castle. Rampage time! (Body)
>...Nah, shift into human form outside the city and go in.
>Slam into the castle and demand butter! And surrender! (Intimidate, HARD)
>Write-In
>>
>>337037
>Slam into the castle and demand butter! And surrender! (Intimidate, HARD)
>>
>>337037
>>Slam into the castle and demand butter! And surrender! (Intimidate, HARD)
>>
>>337037
>Actually... Make that YOUR city and castle. Rampage time! (Body)
>>
Whelp, roll me a 1d20+9 for Intimidate.

Intimidate has leveled up!
>>
>>337037
>>Slam into the castle and demand butter! And surrender! (Intimidate, HARD)
>>
Rolled 1 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>337050
>>
Rolled 16 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>337050
>>
>>337054
1+9=10

Critical Failure!


You come soaring down, and begin your epic speech.

"Hear me mortals, and shiver at the name of Re-"

You slam head-first into the castle, and your head sticks into the royal court, where a peasant screams, the king draws his (no doubt ineffective) blade, and the queen screams.

"Well. Hi."

You see a cannonball hit the wall next to you. It's only a matter of time before they hit the biggest target, as in YOU.

Actions.

>Nom the royal court.
>...Try to get your head unstuck from the wall. (Agility, HARD)
>...Ask nicely for their surrender. (Diplomacy, VERY HARD)
>Demand their surrender. (Intimidate, HARD)
>Write-In
>>
Rolled 8 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>337050
Yell harder?
>>
>>337063
>>Demand their surrender. (Intimidate, HARD)
>>
>>337063
>Nom the royal court.
>>
>>337063
>Demand their surrender. (Intimidate, HARD)
>>
>>337063
>>Demand their surrender. (Intimidate, HARD)
We, can, DO THIS!
>>
Roll me a 1d20+10 for INTIMIDATE
>>
Rolled 9 + 10 (1d20 + 10)

>>337076
>>
Rolled 15 + 10 (1d20 + 10)

>>337076
+10 bonus, we should have this.
>>
Rolled 3 + 10 (1d20 + 10)

>>337076
>>
>>337081
15+10=25

Success!

You cough loudly.

"I recommend you surrender before I eat you all."

The queen rushes to the side of the King, who sighs.

"God damn it... Is Kersteina up to her thrice-damned tricks again?"

"Hey, that's my mom. Would you happen to know where she is?"

The king nods.

"Fine, I'll tell you but only if you leave my Kingdom alone for a fucking while. It's hard enough to deal with her and not to mention you."

Actions.

>Agree.
>...Obviously you didn't hear me. I said surrender OR die. I don't care about my mother.
>Eat him, you can always find where your mother lives on your own.
>Write-In
>>
>>337090
>Agree.
>>
>>337090
>Agree.
>>
>>337090
>Agree.
>>
"...Fine."

"Shake on it?"

"Indeed."

You thrust a claw through the wall and tap his hand with it, in a strange shaking manner.

"Alright, now you know the mountains south of here?"

Hey, that's where you came from...

"Yeah?"

"That's approximately where Kersteina is. Now leave my kingdom be, please. Before you deal any more damage to it."

Actions.

>...Eat him. You don't tend to follow deals well.
>You are Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight! You follow your code of honour!
>Write-In
>>
>>337107
>You are Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight! You follow your code of honour!
Give him a halfing slave as thanks
>>
>>337113
>>You are Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight! You follow your code of honour!
Seconded.
>>
>>337113
Supporting
>>
>>337107
>You are Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight! You follow your code of honour!
>>
"On my honour as a knight, I thank you."

You fly off, and an hour later you return with a halfling slave.

"What are you doing back here, Dragon?"

"I wanted to show you a token of apperication."

You hand him (carefully) a halfling slave, and fly off.

"We don't allow slavery!!!" the King's cries fade as you fly towards where your mother is presumed to be.

Roll me a 1d20-4 for something.
>>
Rolled 8 - 4 (1d20 - 4)

>>337143
Rolling
>>
Rolled 13 - 4 (1d20 - 4)

>>337143
Heh, allow it.
>>
Rolled 14 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337143
>>
>>337152
14-4=10

Failure!

As you go towards the mountains, you get attacked from above, clipping your wings and sending you flying down. You then hear a "Fuck you, asshole! This is my turf!" from a rather feminine voice.

Actions.

>...Well, you guess you know where you got the sailor's tongue from. Yell out "Mom?" and try to land. (Charisma)
>Fuck, uh... Try to hit back. (Agility)
>Write-In
>>
>>337173
>>...Well, you guess you know where you got the sailor's tongue from. Yell out "Mom?" and try to land. (Charisma)
>>
>>337173
>...Well, you guess you know where you got the sailor's tongue from. Yell out " Dmnit Mom! Flying is hard enough without you fucking up my wings!" and try to land. (Charisma)
>>
>>337177
This
>>
>>337173
>>...Well, you guess you know where you got the sailor's tongue from. Yell out "Mom?" and try to land. (Charisma)
>>
Roll me a 1d20+5 for this.
>>
Rolled 6 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>337189
>>
Rolled 16 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>337189
>>
>>337195
16+5=21

"Damn it mom! Flying is already hard enough without you fucking up my wings!"

You hit the ground, and barely manage to land.

"...Renexizious?"

You hear a thud next to you, and a rather small white dragon is next to you, apparently your mother.

"...Mother?"

"It is you! I wondered where you went for the past four years! Now look at you, big and strong!"

"Mom, ple-"

"My little Rennie, all grown up!'

"Mo-"

"By the gods, I missed you... Where's your father?"

Actions.

>Overlooking some slaves. Which I got you as a gift, of course.
>Overlooking some slaves, mom.
>...He's back home.
>Erh. Where's your lair? You clipped my wings and it'll be a while before I'll be able to fly again.
>Write-In
>>
>>337209
>Overlooking some slaves. Which I got you as a gift, of course.
>>
>>337209
>>Overlooking some slaves, mom.
>>Erh. Where's your lair? You clipped my wings and it'll be a while before I'll be able to fly again.
>>
>>337209
>Overlooking some slaves, mom.
>Erh. Where's your lair? You clipped my wings and it'll be a while before I'll be able to fly again.
>>
>>337209
>>Overlooking some slaves, mom.
>>Erh. Where's your lair? You clipped my wings and it'll be a while before I'll be able to fly again.
Silently realise that this is how Victor felt when you congratulated him on running the mob
>>
"Just overlooking some slaves, mo-"

"Aww! You're in the family business as well! Oh, I'm so proud of you!"

"Anyways... You clipped my wings, and it's rather hard to fucking fly with clipped wings, mom."

"Oh, well I suppose I can carry you up... You have a human form, yes?"

"I do..."

"Alright, get on my back, and hold on. It'll be a bonding experience I never had with you when you were a little child!"

She soars up through the heavens, and lands in her lair... You note that smoke is coming out of it, black smoke similar to that of a factory. She lands outside and shifts into human form, which is surprisingly tall and armored in mail haubrek.

Actions.

>What exactly is the family business?
>So uh... How did you meet my father?
>Just go inside.
>Write-In
>>
>>337241
>What exactly is the family business?
>So uh... How did you meet my father?
We have so many questions!
>>
>>337241
>What exactly is the family business?
>You wont believe what I've done while I was on my own
>>
>>337241
>What exactly is the family business?
>So uh... How did you meet my father?
Are we still wearing our armor?
>>
>>337241
>What exactly is the family business?
>Just go inside.
>>
>>337259
Yep.

"So... Uh, what exactly is the family business?"

"Huh? Oh, warmongering, slavery, and looting."

She knocks on the stone-iron door, and a dwarf opens it, you note the dwarf looks malnourished and terrified of your mother.

"So, how exactly did you meet my father?"

"Oh, that. Well, I was raiding for some concubines not too far away from here when I found a rather particular cave. I entered, and found your father on the other side. Luckily I was in human form, and he interested me quite a bit. He even married me.

"Wait... Concubines?" You must looked confused, as your mother laughs for a few seconds.

"Of course, you didn't think I was one of those overly pious types, did you?"

"...No." Your slightly saddened by this... Knowing that your father was a "passing notice."

"I can introduce you to them, if you want."

"No! No, it's fine."

"Oh well, I have an arrangement with them later this day."

"Mom!"

You pass by plenty of slaves, quite a few seem malnourished or beaten.

>Mention this.
>No, best not to bring it up.
>>
>>337273
>Mention this.
We can bring her into the light
>>
>>337273
>No, best not to bring it up.

I don't think there's anything holding us back morally now. Besides, it's not like a mother wants to be told by a son she just found.
>>
>>337273
>>Mention this.
Healthy slaves can work harder, and are less likely to rebel. This isn't about good or evil, this is about competence!
>>
>>337273
>>No, best not to bring it up.
>>
>>337284
Who's going to rebel against not one but two dragons. It also appears that things have been running fine in this condition since before we got here.
>>
>>337273
>>Mention this.
But first point out that we DO have concubines of our own. We don't want our mother to get the wrong idea
>>
>>337294
We should ask her how many have died in the past year compared to our very low slave death count.
>>
>>337294
Even a failed rebellion is a terrible distraction. And even if things work, whings can work better.
>>
>>337300
She might just not care. They're possessions, and very cheap to get.
>>
>>337273
>Mention this.
>>
You decide to mention this.

"...Just wondering mother, why do your slaves look... Well, beaten and malnourished?"

"Hm? I barely notice. I only of course, beat them if they do something I, in particular do not like. They are rather easy to get, though sadly are easy to break. The rest of the beatings, the kobolds do that on occasion, if your wondering. I try to get them to lay off of them, but honestly I could care less so long as they work and serve loyally."

"The kobolds handle the distribution of food?"

"I suppose, they found some sort of book called the "Communist Manifesto" and decided to take it to heart. I don't really care what they do, so long as they worship me."

You notice a few of the workers scowling at her, apparently disliking her. Unlike your slaves, who actually are pretty neutral about you. Or, for the few you saved from the shitty conditions (like the underground, for the drow) actually somewhat like you.

Actions.

>Well, you should probably READ that then.
>No, you've advised your mother enough.
>Well, maybe you should tell Mother about YOUR slaves, and how they seem to work a little more... Faithfully then these worms.
>>
>>337316
>Well, maybe you should tell Mother about YOUR slaves, and how they seem to work a little more... Faithfully then these worms.
Mention how good workers they are and how a couple even love us.
>>
>>337316
>Well, maybe you should tell Mother about YOUR slaves, and how they seem to work a little more... Faithfully then these worms.
No way this can end poorly.
>>
>>337316
>>No, you've advised your mother enough.
Some folks don't rotate their tires or put off filing taxes.
>>
>>337316
>No, you've advised your mother enough.
>>
"Well, my slaves love me. Well, most do."

"Well, that's your thing. If your slaves love you, so be it. I prefer cutting costs wherever I can, including some... Downsizing, for some of the more disloyal slaves."

You continue walking throughout her rather massive lair, and come to what you assume is her sleeping quarters.

"Alright, Ren, there should be a sleeping quarter to my left... Your older brother is sleeping there after an adventuring party nearly killed him.

She lays down, but you can't help but feel a slight ping of anger... And jealousy at the fact that you have a brother... Or half-brother.

Actions.

>Boast about what you've done on Earth.
>Put aside the anger, that's just the barbarian talking. You can tolerate having an "older" brother. Your still better then him.
>...Your slightly curious about what your brother is like.
>Write-In
>>
>>337338
>Boast about what you've done on Earth.
>>
>>337338
>>...Your slightly curious about what your brother is like.
>>
>>337338
>Boast about what you've done on Earth.
>...Your slightly curious about what your brother is like.
>>
>>337338
>...Your slightly curious about what your brother is like.
>>
"...Fine I suppose. But know this, I am the conqueror of Sweden, destroyer of all who oppose me, and loyal husband!"

"Alright, Ren... Wait, what was that last part?"

"Erh, nothing."

"Oh, alright. Now be careful with your brother... He's not as strong as you."

You go into the sleeping quarter, and... See your brother? In plate armor. He's apparently a half-dragon, also with white scales.

"Hold! Who goes there? Friend or foe!"

Actions...

>...Knight time. You are Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight, and a friend.
>...Foe.
>What's your name?
>...You don't look like a dragon.
>Write-In
>>
>>337360
>I challenge thee to a duel brother! So we may bond with fisticuffs!
>>
>>337360
>Write-In
>"Family, I'm your brother."
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
>>337370
Seconded
>>
"Family, I am your brother."

"Truly? Verily well. I presume you are my younger brother, Renexizious?"

"That I am."

"Ah, rightly so!"

His horse neighs, and he holds on. He takes off his plate visor, and looks down at you.

"So, I assume you finally found Mother? What do you think of her?"

Actions.
>You dislike the way she treats slaves.
>Your fairly neutral on her.
>You rather like her style, to be honest
>Write-In
>>
>>337400
>You dislike the way she treats slaves.
>>
>>337400
>>You rather like her style, to be honest
She's a dragon's dragon.
>>
>>337400
>Your fairly neutral on her.

I mean I have no quarrels with her treatment of salves but just how she clipped our wings.
>>
>>337400
>Your fairly neutral on her.
6/10 could've been better.
>>
"I'm fairly neutral on her."

"Ah, verily well. I will have you know, if it were not for the fact I am forced to stay here and stay mine hand, I would venture out with a posse to bring her to justice."

"How would you do that?"

"With a lot of luck, hope, and honest steel."

"Hm."

"Anyhow, that matters little. I assume you must be exhausted from the trip?"

"I am, I guess."

Actions.

>Is that knight act justified, or are you just faking to be one?
>...Why would you want to bring mother to justice? What happened to family ties?
>Want to duel to see who is the better brother?
>Just go sleep.
>Write-In
>>
>>337418
>>Just go sleep.
Too much to take in for now.
>>
>>337418
>...Why would you want to bring mother to justice? What happened to family ties?
>>
>>337418
>...Why would you want to bring mother to justice? What happened to family ties?

Perhaps he knows of something regarding our mothers past. Something that she would rather not tell us herself.
>>
"But, first... Why would you want to bring mother to justice? What happened to family ties?"

"It is nothing personal, I assure you. It is just my code of personal honour. Mother takes slaves, and I do not believe in slavery. Not to mention her cruel treatment of them, and her personal cult of kobolds. Bahamut would not smile upon us as a family if we continue the direction she is headed... Not to mention her constant debauchery with the concubines... And you, her favored son... By the gods, my envy is getting the better of me.."
He gets off his horse and kneels in prayer. Hm... Great.

Actions.

>...Great. Your brother is a moralfag. Don't mention the fact you have slaves or anything like that.
>Bring up that you do in fact, own slaves, but don't torture them or anything like that. It's best to be honest.
>Write-In
>>
>>337434
>Bring up that you do in fact, own slaves, but don't torture them or anything like that. It's best to be honest.
>>
>>337434
>>Bring up that you do in fact, own slaves, but don't torture them or anything like that. It's best to be honest.
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
>>337434 #
>Bring up that you do in fact, own slaves, but don't torture them or anything like that. It's best to be honest.
We already told our mother so it'a hardly a secret
>>
"Well, I do own slaves and concubines, but I don't torture them or anything like that."

"Ah, good. I can barely tolerate needless cruelty. Thank you for telling me, brother. I know it is in your instincts."

Actions.

>Whelp, your headed to bed.
>Why exactly does he worship Bahamut, why not Tiamat or just God?
>No problem with me owning slaves? Then why do you dislike mother so much?
>Write-In
>>
>>337451
>No problem with me owning slaves? Then why do you dislike mother so much?
>>
>>337451
>>Why exactly does he worship Bahamut, why not Tiamat or just God?
>>No problem with me owning slaves? Then why do you dislike mother so much?
>>
Waiting ten more minutes.
>>
"...Why don't you have a problem with ME owning slaves? Why do you dislike mother so much?"

"I never said I hated her, or disliked her. She is our mother, I simply do what I think is just. And I do have a problem with you owning slaves, it's just that our family tradition is so rooted in slavery, I believe only I can break the mold."

"Hm. Why do you worship Bahamut, why not Tiamat or just God?"

"God? You mean gods, right?"

"No, on Earth there is a religion about one God."

"Ah. You see, I worship both. Tiamat, to grant me strength, and Bahamut, to grant me the convection to do right."

"Aren't they both mortal enemies?"

He sighs.

"Yes. Though they a kin, they cannot help but fight. It is sad, in a sense. Tell me brother, that we will never meet on the field of battle."

Actions.

>We may, if you continue down the path of Good.
>No, I swear it.
>Does dueling count?
>Write-In
>>
>>337508
>>Does dueling count?
>>
>>337508
>I don't fucking know man
>>
>>337508
>No, I swear it.
>>
Waiting fifteen more minutes, pls no tie.
>>
>>337510
I'll switch.
>I don't know.
>>
>>337510
This sounds good.
>>
>>337516
+1
>>
"I'm not sure, to be honest brother."

"Very well, I suppose I will see you in the morning."

The two of you sleep in a different room, and you awake in the morning to see your brother on his horse, practicing swordplay, he notices you and turns his horse towards you.

"Ren, mother wants us to ride to get your father and your slaves... I was wondering if your willing to ride with me?"

"Won't there be a notable lack of room?"

"No, we're taking the carriage to get them. Should take a few hours."

"Alright, say... You never did tell me your name."

He nods.
"It's Richard."

"Sounds awfully... English."

"English? What does that mean?"

"Nothing."

Actions.

>Sure, you'll ride down with Richard.
>No, you'll stay and talk to your mother some more.
>...Wait and let me get breakfast first, holy shit.
>Write-In
>>
>>337523
>>Sure, you'll ride down with Richard.
>>
>>337523
>Sure, you'll ride down with Richard.
>>
"Sure, Richard."

"Hey Renexizious, you never know... We might find a damsel on the way."

"Sure we will, if we're lucky"

He laughs a little.

"Aye, luck is all that matters. Come on, let's get the carriage."

After preparing the carriage, you begin the ride down the mountain...
Roll me a 1d20.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>337550
>>
2

As you descend down the mountain, the two of you get into small talk about what you've been doing for the past year. However, you notice that a man is slumped down in the center of the road.. It doesn't seem your brother has noticed... Or if he did, he's not slowly down.

Actions.

>Tell him to slow down!
>...He can see the man, right?
>Speed it up!
>>
>>337575
Let's go full Paul walker
>>
>>337605
...What does that mean?
>>
>>337610
Fast as fuck
>>
Whelp, ending rolling in five minutes.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d20)

"Go faster!"

"I know."

You run the man over, causing a sickening crack on his head. Due to your necromancy training, you can tell that was an undead creature. There was no blood or anything like that once the horses crushed it's head.

Ignore my rolling...
>>
You feel a jolt from underneath the vehicle.

"Son of a... He latched on, try to deal with it while I try to drive this carriage."

"It'll be helpful to know what this thing is!"

"A zombie raised from a nearby necromancer, that's as much as I know!"

Actions.

>Shit, well... See if you can't take control of this zombie with your necromancy... (Necromancy.)
>Try to climb below and beat the shit out of it! (Agility)
>Summon Smaug and order him to screw with the zombie attached to your carriage. (Summoning)
>Write-In
>>
>>337641
>Try to climb below and beat the shit out of it! (Agility)
>>
>>337641
>Shit, well... See if you can't take control of this zombie with your necromancy... (Necromancy.)

>>337703
Anon, we have as much agility as a brick shithouse
>>
>>337703
>>337707
Oh yeah, huh. Changing my vote to necromancy.
>>
>>337641
>Shit, well... See if you can't take control of this zombie with your necromancy... (Necromancy.)
>>
Alright, back after getting into a 1v1 with a German in fucking battlefield.

And somehow winning. I think that was the best match I ever fought, kinda played out like Predator... But the German was the predator.

Alright, roll me a 1d20+4
>>
Rolled 14 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337732
I'm that guy who rolled a nat 1 in Part 14, by the way.
>>
Rolled 10 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337732
>>
>>337737
14+4=18

Success!

You wrestle away control of whoever created this zombie with the utmost ease... You can now command this zombie.

Actions.

>Tell it to jump off the cliff or something... You'd rather your bro Richard not realize your a pretty powerful necromancer.
>...Tell it to hold on.
>Try to see if it's powerful enough to tell you who's it's owner is. (Necromancy)
>Write-In
>>
>>337741
>Try to see if it's powerful enough to tell you who's it's owner is. (Necromancy)
>>
Whelp, roll me another 1d20+4
>>
>>337741
>Try to see if it's powerful enough to tell you who's it's owner is. (Necromancy)
>>
Rolled 3 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337743
I rolled a 14 before. Maybe my luck has changed?
>>
Rolled 7 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337743
>>
Damn, well I'm off to sleep. It's almost 2am.
>>
>>337746
>>337746
7+4=11

Great Failure!

You sense that it is not powerful, and you think Richard is beginning to catch on.

"What's the matter? Afraid of a zombie?"

Actions.

>...Order the zombie to let go. What's a single minion to you?
>Tell the zombie to hold on, but make it look like you got rid of it. (Charisma, HARD)
>Write-In
>>
Rolled 16 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>337744

save pls
>>
>>337749
Damnit, I was late. What a time to go get some tea.

>...Order the zombie to let go. What's a single minion to you?
>>
You mentally order it to let go, and it tumbles off, out of your reach and destroyed.

"Huh, well I guess that was easier then expected... Say, Ren... What exactly is Sweden like?"

"Well, it's rather cold, but the alcohol's good and so are the women!"

The two of you talk on the way down, and he eventually asks you a question.

"Say, Ren... What exactly did you expect of mom?"

Actions.

>A little more... Caring? Towards other people, of course.
>...A little less parental, to be honest.
>...Less swearing, for some reason.
>Write-In
>>
>>337755
>...Less swearing, for some reason.
>>
>>337755
I think this particular choice has confused anons QM
>>
>>337755
>>A little more... Caring? Towards other people, of course.
>>
>>337755
>a bit more caring i guess..
>>
>>337755
>A little more... Caring? Towards other people, of course.
>>
>>337755
>...Less swearing, for some reason.
>>
>>337755
More caring.
>>
>>337755
>>A little more... Caring? Towards other people, of course.
>>
The general consesus could be summed up as "Less of a pirate"
>>
Rolled 14 (1d20)

"Erh... A little more caring. Also less swearing. She reminds me of a pirate at this point."

"...You know, that wouldn't surprise me if that's her hobby in her spare time."

"What, piracy?"

"Yeah."

The two of you nod, you could see your mother being a pirate. But she'll never have the eyepatch you have. Never!

The carriage eventually gets to the bottom of the mountain and continues on.

Ignore my rolling.
>>
Once you reach the bottom of the mountain, you see a wounded horse, and... What seems to be skeletons. Great. More undead. You note a human female in rather regal clothes lying not too far from the wounded horse, unharmed, yelling for help. Richard begins slowing down the carriage, but you can't help but think this isn't a distraction or a speedbump, at the very least.

Actions.

>...Tell him to speed up. You don't have time to waste. (Charisma, HARD)
>You are Sir Renexizious, and there is a damsel in distress! Leap from the carriage and punch one of the skeletons with your knightly fisticuffs! (Brawling)
>Try to extend your will over these undead. (Necromancy, HARD)
>Cast a spell! (Specify for which spell.)
>Write-In
>>
>>338697
>Cast Firebolt (which you completely forgot to add to our character sheet.)
>>
>>338697
>You are Sir Renexizious, and there is a damsel in distress! Leap from the carriage and punch one of the skeletons with your knightly fisticuffs! (Brawling)
>>
>>338697
Damsel in distress.
>>
>>338713
Seconded.
>>
So I did some more calculations, and if the speed of our dad's punch is above average but not extremely fast (Basicaly, if he punches as fast as average boxer), his punch is equivalent to shaped charge of 29.5KG TNT

Really, there are no more enemies for him left that are worth fighting.
>>
>>338741
You are already dead.

Ending voting in five more minutes.
>>
Rolled 1 (1d2)

Looks like a tie.

1=Firebolt.
2=Jump off and punch someone!

>>338741
Also, for this, I'm going to rule he punches extremely slow, and that unless it's a direct, full on hit, it doesn't hit with maximum damage.
>>
So, roll me a 1d20+1 for Firebolt!
>>
Rolled 15 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>338781
>>
>>338781
Is the damsel going to be safe?
>>
>>338778
Also, Dad is eleven meters tall stout dragon. Only time when his max punch vs graze power would make a diference is if he's fighting a steel colosus.
>>
Rolled 12 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>338781
>>
>>338783
>>338783
15+1=16

Success!

You carefully aim a firebolt straight into one of the skeleton's skulls, causing it to explode most violently. Shards of bone go everywhere, and the damsel puts her head down.

There is however, five more skeletons left, and one has grabbed onto the carriage.

Actions.

>Cast a spell! (Specify)
>See if you can't raise that skeleton to fight for you! (Necromancy)
>Try to climb over and kick off the skeleton holding onto the carriage! (Agility)
>Jump off the carriage and fight these fools with fisticuffs! (Body)
>Write-In
>>
>>338810
>Try to climb over and kick off the skeleton holding onto the carriage! (Agility)
>>
>>338810
>Jump off the carriage and fight these fools with fisticuffs! (Body)

I wonder if we can punch a skeleton in such a way that it's scattered bones hit other skeletons, causing them to get rekt as well.
>>
>>338810
>>Jump off the carriage and fight these fools with fisticuffs! (Body)
Its just some skelies, we got this
>>
>>338810
>>Jump off the carriage and fight these fools with fisticuffs! (Body)
>>
>>338815
Our agility is bonus is -4.
Our body bonus is +15.

Our strength and agility could be compared to a tectonic plate.
>>
>>338810
>>Jump off the carriage and fight these fools with fisticuffs! (Body)
>>
Roll me a 1d20+15, anons.
>>
Rolled 16 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>338837
Hoo boy.
>>
Rolled 12 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>338837
>>
Rolled 9 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>338837
>>
>>338845
>31
Guess we One Punch Man them.
>>
>>338845
16+15=31

Extremely Overwhelming Success!

You jump off the carriage, and plant your fist straight into a skeleton, causing it to explode into a shower of bone shards into other skeletons. However, sadly it seems that the shower of bone seems to do very little, besides mildly comfort them. You solve this by grabbing another skeleton and crushing it's skull effortlessly to vent your frustration.

There are three skeletons left, one is climbing up Richard's cart, and the other two are charging at you.

Actions.

>Throw something at the skeleton on the carriage! (Body)
>Finish the rest of these bastards with your fists! (Body)
>Try to cast a spell! (Specify)
>Burrow underground and try to pull them beneath for an easy kill. (Body)
>Write-In
>>
>>338865
Throw. We're Hulking this shit.
>>
>>338865
>Pick up one skeleton and throw it at the skeleton on the carriage.
Let's do this wrestling-style, follow up with an elbow drop
>>
>>338865
>Throw the skeleton closest to us at the skeleton on the carriage! (Body, HARD?)
>>
Throwing time, this time with skeleton on skeleton action.

Roll me a 1d20+15.
>>
Rolled 9 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>338878
>>
Rolled 20 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>338878
>>
>>338880
I'm convinced I only got this 20 by holding myself back from including a punny line with my roll.
>>
>>338880
It would seem that our sick throwing skills have destroyed the thrown skeleton, the skeleton we aimed at, and an entire invading necromantic army that just happened to be in that general direction.
>>
>>338880
OH SHIT
HULK HOGAN IS SMILING.
>>
>>338884
>>338880
Those skellies are in trouble, brrrother!
>>
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>>338880
20+15=35

Amazing Critical Success!

You pick up one of the skeletons and toss it straight at the other skeleton. This causes both of them to explode, sending skeleton fragments flying all over the damned place, and cause bone fragments on a nearby tree to spell an R. The last skeleton throws down his blade and starts fleeing. Damn, you must be terrifying if an undead creature, controlled by someone else, is fleeing. You yell something out.
"Your in trouble now, brrrother!" and pick up a rock, and throw it at the skeleton's head, causing said head to shatter into pieces. The stone keeps going, and decimates four trees before coming to a stop.
"Renexiziomania, brrother!" You look around for other opponents, but none can be seen to fight against your ability to beat the shit out of things.

The damsel is fucking terrified, since you just did Renexiziomania on those skeleton cunts, and her horse is fucking panicking.

Actions.

>Pick her up and put her in the carriage, she is to be your trophy from the first annual Renexiziomania.
>Ask if she's alright and help her up.
>Leave her and go back on your carriage.
>Use Necrotic Healing on the wounded horse. (Necromancy, Free)
>Write-In
>>
>>338906
Pick her up.
>>
>>338906
>Pick her up and put her in the carriage, she is to be your trophy from the first annual Renexiziomania.
>Use Necrotic Healing on the wounded horse. (Necromancy, Free)
We can ask how she's doing when the cart is rolling again.
>>
>>338917
I second this.
>>
>>338906
>Pick her up and put her in the carriage, she is to be your trophy from the first annual Renexiziomania.
>Use Necrotic Healing on the wounded horse. (Necromancy, Free)
>>
Roll me a 1d20+4

Necromancy has leveled up!

Next time you study at the University, you can learn some new Necromancy spells!
>>
Rolled 20 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>338931
>>
>>338933
Another 20?

I'm scared now...
>>
>>338933
We can make it better. We have the magic.
>>
>>338933
>>338934
The horse has healed so well it can talk and, inspired by our greatness, declares its name to be Horse Hogan and will join us in celebrating Renexiziomania
>>
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>>338933
Remember kids, the Necrodice wills it. And you don't argue with Necrodice.

So... Uh. You heal the horse, and it apparently likes you enough for you attempt to ride it. Every good Emperor has a horse, after all... But you start noticing that it's turning a pale shade, and for some reason has grown slightly. It licks you out of gratitude and follows behind your carriage.
Congrats anons, you have tamed a horse and made it more manly. If you want, feel free to name it.

You go inside the carriage to make sure the damsel is alright... Roll me a 1d20+5 for first impressions.
>>
Rolled 19 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>338952
Time to make her panties drop.
>>
Rolled 12 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>338952
>>
>>338959
I believe the panties have just melted.
>>
Rolled 5 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>338952
I know QM, I'm the one who defied it and got all the 1s way back during the White Death incident. It seems the Necrodice has truly forgiven me.
>>
>>338952
Also, name the horse Binky. Like Death's horse in Diskworld.
>>
>>338959
19+5=24

Great Success!

She says something you can't understand, and gives you a kiss on your check, and she goes into a speech in her strange language, which sounds similar to that of Spanish.

Actions.

>Ask if Richard can understand what she's saying.
>Try to figure out this language. (Lingustics.)
>Write-In
>>
>>338969
>>Try to figure out this language. (Lingustics.)
There is no language we cannot master! Except Turkish for some reason.
>>
>>338969
>>Try to figure out this language. (Lingustics.)
>>
>>338971
Dragons can't communicate with roaches
>>
>>338969
Attempt to learn the language, but consult broseidon in case that doesn't work out.
>>
Roll me a 1d20+2

Linguistics has leveled up!
>>
Rolled 1 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>338979
>>
Rolled 19 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>338979
>>
Rolled 18 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>
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>>338980
>>
>>338980
...Use Barbaric anons?

>Yes.
>No.
>>
>>338983
Why are we so good all of a sudden?
>>
>>338990
>Yes
Part of me think we should save it, but another part of me really feel like getting another chance at this. Especially with those other two rolls being god tier.
>>
>>338990
N-no need, QM! Check my 19!
>>
>>338990
>Yes.
We are the language master, we should get this.
>>
Roll me a 1d20.

>>338995
Critical Failures are prioritized anon.
>>
Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>338999
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>338999
>>
Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>338999
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>338999
Oh, didn't know that.
>>
Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>338999
>>
>>339014
It's at the bottom of the character sheet. It's best of the first three rolls, or a critical, with the critical taking priority.
>>
>>339012
18

Success!

After some thinking, you eventually understand her language which she calls "Amevonian". It's basically Spanish, but more complex to to the vowels forced to always sound like an S, and the longer words being quite similar to french.

"Alright, so who are you?"

"Ah, I am Duchess Rosa de Castela, and I have you to thank for saving me from those skeletons." She's rather good-looking, with slightly tanned skin and dark black hair, along with brown eyes and a few scars by her hands.

"Any idea why they wanted you?"

She shakes her head.

"I know I might of made some enemies in the Silver Church, but that's truly it. Oh, and the Mage's Guild doesn't really like me."

"Why, if I may ask?"

"Ah... A little bit of business with taxes, and them refusing to pay. Sufficiently said, I was forced to use more... Brutal methods."

"Ah."

"So, who might you be?"

Actions.

>You are but a simple knight, in need of a reward.
>You are Renexizious, son of Karesteina the white Dragon!
>You are Renexizious, Emperor of Sweden!
>You are just Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!
>Write-In
>>
>>339043
>You are just Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!
>>
>>339043
>>You are but a simple knight, in need of a reward.
>>
>>339043
>>You are Renexizious, son of Karesteina the white Dragon!
Let's use a relation she'll recognize.
>>
>>339043
>You are Renexizious, Emperor of Sweden!
>>
>>339043
They have no clue what the fuck a Sweden is, so I'd say Dragonknight. Ask about the scars on her hands.
>>
>>339055
changed my vote to You are just Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!
>>
>>339043
>>You are just Sir Renexizious the Dragonknight!
Play it cool boys
>>
"I am sir Renexizious, the Dragonknight!"

"Ah, I see... Who's driving this carriage, perchance?"

"My brother, Richard."

"Oh, interesting. I was hoping we weren't going to fly off the cliff because you forgot to drive."

"That only happens to genre-unaware people, don't worry."

"Ah."

"So... Just a question, how did you get those scars on your hands?"

She curiously looks at you.

"You've never seen a Runemark, have you?"

"Runemark?"

"It's a rune engraved into one's skin, of course it hurts like the three hells, but it works."

"What does it do?"

"Ah, interested are you?"

She opens the door to the carriage, and extends her hand. A massive fireball, bigger then your firebolt goes into the forest and explodes.

"Holy shi-"

"Of course, it can also cast other spells. It's extremely expensive, and requires an active talent in both Necromancy, and Enchantment."

Actions.

>So... What about my reward?
>You are in fact, quite skilled with the art of spell-casting yourself...
>...So, how old are you?
>Write-In
>>
>>339081
>>So... What about my reward?
>>
>>339081
Ask about age and spellcasting.
>>
>>339081
>So... What about my reward?
Lets try to get a rune mark to cast dragon sized fireballs
>>
>>339081
>You are in fact, quite skilled with the art of spell-casting yourself...

Immagine, if we get Runemarks. How terrifying it would be to find out, that the dragon is not only able to literaly devour your whole army, but is also better wizard than all of those you have combined.
>>
>>339081
>You are in fact, quite skilled with the art of spell-casting yourself...
I bet we can figure out how to make runemarks ourselves.
>>
"Intriging, I too can cast spells."

"Truly? I would like to see your spells."

Actions.

>Cast your most impressive spell! (Specify)
>...Most of your spells are necromancy, she might think your connected to those undead from earlier... Probably best not to cast anything.
>Write-In
>>
>>339100
Damn, I forgot which spells we had.
>>
>>339100
>Complain that there are no targets around for our most impressive spells and then Cast Summon Familiar
>>339104
Check the character sheet https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jI0aGxA_2h3SAcPYri-1fdgskbK3IbtfEzSLJ7VY9gU/edit
>>
>>339100
There is only one spell that we have which is impressive enough.

>Summon familiar.
>>
Just saying, I also count your breath as a magic spell.

Also, list of spells.

Raise Dead, 24 Hours. (Necromancy, Touch)
Cause Fear. (Enchantment, Ranged)
Raise Skeleton, 3 weeks (Necromancy, Touch)
Necrotic Healing (Necromancy, Ranged)
Runes (Enchantment, Touch)
Cast Firebolt (Pyromancy)
Summon Familiar: Smaug
>>
>>339100
>Cast your most impressive spell! (Specify)
Is smaug with us? If not resummon him if we can do that here.
>>
>>339100
>Summon Familiar.
>>
>>339113
>I also count your breath as a magic spell.

Well that solves it. Let's freeze this forest.
>>
>>339108
I second this. If Smaug isn't interdimensional, use ice breath.
>>
Guys. Armor runes in our scales can be a thing now.
>>
Ignore my rolling, also roll me a 1d20+1 for how well Smaug behaves.
>>
Rolled 1 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>339128
>>
Rolled 10 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>339128
forgot to roll
>>
Rolled 18 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>339128
>>
>>339131
God damn it Smaug!
>>
>>339131
Did the bastard wake up hungry and just devoured our new horse whole?

It did, didin't it.
>>
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>>339131
I think Smaug just reduced your chance of getting laid. Or survival.

You summon Smaug, and he flies towards you, but he suddenly descends, and eats the carriage wheel, this sends the carriage tumbling towards the cliff, meanwhile, Rosa is utterly, Richard is yelling, and the carriage goes right by the cliff, and tilts off the cliff precariously, Both you and Rosa freeze up. Rosa looks at you and looks down.
"I'm going to try to slide to safety, it may be our only hope."
Goddamn it Smaug.

Actions.

>...Try to get out by climbing upward. (Body, Opposite Roll.)
>...Shit, if you shapeshifted into a dragon or anything else, no doubt you would squish Rosa... Try to open the door beneath you and try to slide to safety with Rosa! (Agility)
>You can always try to get laid by a different woman, shapeshift and destroy the carriage.
>...Try to calm Rosa down, maybe Richard can pull the carriage up. (Charisma)
>Write-In
>>
>>339157
>You can always try to get laid by a different woman, shapeshift and destroy the carriage.
Make sure to slap smaug after this
>>
>>339157
>>...Try to get out by climbing upward. (Body, Opposite Roll.)
>>
>>339157
>>...Try to get out by climbing upward. (Body, Opposite Roll.)
>>
>>339157
Calm Rosa down.
>>
Ending voting in five minutes.

Just saying mang, that transforming in the carriage would kill Rosa. Also, with your strength climbing up the carriage... Well, it's very likely that the fucking carriage will fall due to the weight readjustment.
>>
>>339157
>...Try to calm Rosa down, maybe Richard can pull the carriage up. (Charisma)

Agility, our eternal foe.I'd rather we try to save our newfound magical knowledge source, but that leaves only one option.
>>
Rolled 1 (1d2)

Rolling.

1=Climb.
2=Calm Rosa down.
>>
Rolled 15, 13 + 15 = 43 (2d20 + 15)

Roll me a 1d20+15.


Ignore my rolling.
>>
>>339209
I think we killed Rosa.
>>
Rolled 3 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>339216
>>339216
>>
Rolled 20 + 15 (1d20 + 15)

>>339216
Dice, don't fail us now.
>>