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  • File : 1270875241.jpg-(233 KB, 560x800, Recovered_JPEG_660.jpg)
    233 KB Maid QUEST PART XIII Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)00:54 No.9097972  

    Part 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9047710/
    Part 2: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9050315/
    Part 3: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9052773/
    Part 4: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9054492/
    Part 5: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9055966/
    Part 6: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9070998/
    Part 7: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9073610/
    Part 8: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9075194/
    Part 9: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9077019/
    Part 10: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9078487/
    Part 11: >>9093599
    Part 12: >>9096268

    You are a young man who has suddenly come into an unexpected inheritance: a rather large mansion

    and a sizeable amount of money. However, your rather eccentric uncle has put a secret rider in

    his will: in order to inherit the money, you must:

    1. Repair the rather old and decaying house.
    2. Hire a full staff of maids to upkeep it.
    3. Have sex with at least three of them. (1/3)
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)00:54 No.9097981
    Alien Repair Bots
    Mysterious Alien Sphere (0% analysed)
    Demonic Ace of Spades - Alicia's Phylactery

    Mansion Status:
    Facilities: Beachfront property
    Kitchen: Average (3 of 5)
    Decor: Poor (1 of 5)
    Gardens: Fair (2 of 5)
    Repair: PERFECT (6 of 5)
    Beach: Average (3 of 5)

    Reginald, Your Butler (Devoted)
    Samantha, Your Head Maid (Devoted) - LOVE
    Katherine, the redheaded trap-kun (Warm 8/10)
    Felicia, the cute catgirl (Warm) - SEXED
    Jehanne, the paladin (Trust)
    Alicia, the former Demon Queen of Lust (Hostile)
    Koyomi, your Japanese gamer science nerd. (Neutral)

    50 XP

    It is evening of day 6 of 30. You are currently working out Alicia's contract with your lawyers.

    WHAT DO?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:55 No.9097988
    1.5 of 3
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)00:55 No.9098009
    1.5, sorry :P
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:56 No.9098017
    Get the contract buisiness finished up
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:56 No.9098021
    Let's do this thing. Sign the contract, specifying that the phylactery will be held by a neutral party.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:56 No.9098024
    Math errors, XP, etc.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)00:56 No.9098032
    Any specific neutral party?
    >> Jabberwock 04/10/10(Sat)00:57 No.9098040

    Give to Reginald.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:57 No.9098043
    These two. Maybe suggest hanging out with Alicia tomorrow and doing something with her. The sooner she's not hostile to us, the better.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:57 No.9098054
    I'm gonna repeat my proposition again:

    Call the Paladin and CARMINE!

    Bring a hammer.

    Put phylactery and hammer on table.

    Have Alicia sit across you. Explain VERY calmly that SHE DOES NOT GET TO DEMAND ANYTHING!
    Threaten to break it if she refuses.

    remove her out of our inheritance
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:58 No.9098057
    Also, see if Literal Genie bullshit is prevented by the contract.

    If it isn't, that's our first order.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:58 No.9098061
    Reginald sounds good.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:58 No.9098062


    He will know what to do if the contract is broken.

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)00:58 No.9098063

    Then banquet to celebrate its completion and the hiring of our nerd scientist; formal wear mandatory, clothing optional.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)00:58 No.9098070
    No Literal Genie Bullshit is literally the very first clause in the contract.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:00 No.9098096
    Someone needs to archive XII, I archived XI and can't do it
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:00 No.9098111
    We should also keep the contract itself somewhere where no one will find it. I'm thinking Reginald here especially, as there will probably be... sticky questions regarding the presence of the clause about his daughter.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:01 No.9098126

    You agree to have Reginald hold onto the Ace of Spaces, and then you sign the papers. The lawyers nod and fold up their briefcases, then walk out of the room.

    You find Reginald sitting in his bedroom. The walls are covered with guns and knives.

    He is sitting in a large, rather ratty easy chair, wearing a smoking jacket and smoking a pipe. He is reading a book. It appears to be Charles Dickens.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:01 No.9098137

    Experienced lawyers will keep even this vague enough for nobody except us and Alicia to understand.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:02 No.9098157
    "So, hey, you know that whole 'aliens probing your daughter' thing? My idea!"

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:02 No.9098160
    Approach him cautiously
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:03 No.9098168
    I want you to teach me to be a man that you can approve of.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:03 No.9098170



    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:03 No.9098174

    Ooooh, ask him what he thought about David Copperfield, but tell him not to spoil anything as we're only 100 pages in.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:03 No.9098181
    Ask Reginald if he knows anybody that could run a background check on Koyomi.

    I'm suddenly suspicious. No reason not to play it safe.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098191

    Also, our first order to Alicia is to magically conceal the existence of that gag order about the alien probulator thing from anyone who isn't her, us or the lawyers.

    Then we order her to not accept any sleazy orders from us (like to have sex with us, to kill herself in our service, etc.) unless she willingly chooses to.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098194

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098195

    "Please keep this in the safest confidence. It is a matter of life and death"

    And then place the Ace Of Spades into the novel as an improvised bookmark.

    Memorize the book's title.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098198
    Spend some of that XP. We could use some better stats.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098201
    if Alicia breaks the contract and tells him, we won't be able to destroy the phylactery.
    Give the phylactery to Jehanne instead.
    keep Reginald removed from these goings on
    >> sukhoi !KJHro3/ISM 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098206
    psst, you missed the thread... The airplane thread is the other one.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:04 No.9098207

    "Sir, I have a question. Between the fact that your daughter is.... well, yeah, and the fact that she can shoot a squirrel in the left nut at twenty paces, she has the potential to hurt me like I've never been hurt before. It scares me.

    She... she doesn't play games, does she?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:05 No.9098216

    "Hello, my good man."

    Hand him the card.

    "Guard this with your fucking life. Thank you."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:05 No.9098218
    What for?

    Thus far Alicia was the only one that warranted caution and we exercised it a bit too late for it to matter.

    Just let him know what happened and that we're trusting him not only as a butler, but as a friend to make sure nothing happens to the Ace of Spades.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:05 No.9098224
    Honestly if we want to rules lawyer, give it to Sam as she can never not be devoted to us...
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:05 No.9098228


    "Young master."

    "How are you doing?"

    "Just reading. . . it's not a bad book. It's no Great Expectations, but then, little that Dickens wrote is. What can I do for you?"

    "I've signed a contract with Alicia. Part of it holds that we have to keep her phylactery in safe keeping. . . as long as she cooperates, we don't destroy it. But you can hold onto it as insurance in case she goes insane."

    Reginald takes the playing card from you and tucks it into his jacket pocket. He taps out his pipe on his ashtray. "I feel, young master, you did not come here just to give me this," he says, patting his pocket.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:06 No.9098231

    Oh, no, that was just a tortured analogy for how we should go about things. BVR == careful planning, ACM == seat-of-the-pants wildness.

    And I find it interesting that you're not the only planefag keeping track of this thread as well as the plane one... :)
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:06 No.9098237
    ooh, thats interesting, but he may be offended...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:06 No.9098247
    I like it. We should make plans to play a short game of a tabletop game on day seven where it's mandatory for everyone to play. We could make it customary to do so every seventh day of the week.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:07 No.9098258
    I want you to teach me to be a real man. I want you to teach me to be someone you can be proud of.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:07 No.9098260
    oh god
    what's in the pocket?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:07 No.9098268
    Let's make a simple contract that is nothing but a contract that forces her into an eternal quest of redemption for all the wrongs she has done that results in her eternal death if she were to stray from it. That is enough and will fuck up any an all of her plans.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:07 No.9098273

    "Indeed, we didn't."

    "How do you feel about David Copperfield?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:08 No.9098284

    I'll re-iterate this one.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:08 No.9098285

    Background check on our newest maid?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:08 No.9098287
    "...What do you mean?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:08 No.9098289
    Say hello to Reggie. Give him the card, tell him the score regarding it.

    Then tell him we think Jehanne might be attracted to him. Tactfully, though.

    And we tell him the following: "I have two very important things to say to you. First, your daughter is one of the most physically, mentally and emotionally attractive women I've ever met, and the reason I say 'one of' is because when I sit down and think about her it's hard to remember other women well enough for comparison. Second, I am utterly terrified at the prospect of you experiencing justified paternal rage. What should I do to acknowledge the former while preventing the latter, especially given the details of the will?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:09 No.9098301

    (to be clear, I'm samefag.)
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:10 No.9098317

    Do you guys know any good eroges? I need, ah, to do some research. While I'm in the mood, y'know.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:10 No.9098318
    Someone needs to archive Thread 12.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:10 No.9098333
    Seconding this, to be done as our very first order the next time we see Alicia.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:10 No.9098334

    blatant asskissing is not the way to go. Present it from our perspective- Samantha is more dangerous then Reginald. All he can do is kill us, and we're (WINK WINK) terminal anyhow. Samantha can shatter our soul. :<
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:11 No.9098340
    Just FYI: Reginald is reading A Tale of Two Cities.


    "I need you to do a check on our newest Maid. . . Koyomi. Something about her feels off."

    Reginald nods. "Of course. I will unfailingly protect my young master."

    There is an awkward pause.

    Reginald sighs and rubs his mustache. "Young master, we are both men of action. Let us get to the point. You want to sleep with my daughter. I want to cut your balls off if you do so. We are at an impasse here. Perhaps we should settle this properly. Like men."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:11 No.9098346
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:12 No.9098366
    >You want to sleep with my daughter.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:12 No.9098375

    There is no way to do that without one of us dying, however. There must be a way to settle this with only minor burns, sprains, and tissue damage...

    Isn't there?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:12 No.9098379
    This isn't blatant asskissing, this is simple truth. We do find Samantha incredibly attractive in every way, and Reginald does completely fucking terrify us. We may as well be honest with him on both counts. Especially since he also knows the conditions of the will, and thus knows that we're going to have connections with at least two (in his mind, three) other maids.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:12 No.9098380
    I don't want to necessarily sleep with her this early on in the relationship...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098382
    >In return, you need to pay her and she gets a cut of the inheritance money.
    >implying we would sleep with a slutty evil bitch that has slept with probably everyone in our family
    Even we have standards.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098386
    "I beg to differ, good sir. I don't want to sleep with your daughter. I want to marry her, love her, live her, and protect her."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098387
    "Yeah. Okay. uh. I guess I'll meet you on the field of honor. Pistols at dawn, etcetera."

    Talk to Alicia about arranging a tragic accident for Reginald.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098388
    How do you propose we do that my good sir?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098397
    Respectfully acknowledge him. No backing out or backing down. We will die honorably.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:13 No.9098406
    "What do you suggest?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:14 No.9098408

    ". . . so you're saying you don't want to sleep with my daughter? You're saying you don't find her attractive?"

    Reginald fixes you with a hard, stern look. The barest hint of a smile quirks his lips.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:14 No.9098412
    >>9098375 here.

    There is only one manly solution I can think of.

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:14 No.9098413
    We will never betray Reginald.
    Even if he were to attack us.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098426
    "If I wanted to sleep with her I would have done so already, whether you liked it or not. The fact that I haven't should tell you something."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098429
    She is much like her father.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098432
    ...Have to second this.

    I do NOT want to die.

    Not to mention, we get to comfort Sam then!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098434
    "She is very attractive if that's what you want to her. But we don't know her well enough and her feelings for us seem to be sincere. It would be a shame to abuse that."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098439

    >you want to sleep with my daughter

    This statement deserves to be met with a dark and terrible scowl most fearsome to behold. We've got a mansion of delectable pussy at our fingertips, and Samantha is the only one we've bothered to FLIRT with coyly, talk to, and generally act like smitten dipshits around.

    OH REGINALD MIGHT KILL US. BEEN THERE DONE THAT, talk to Alica about that one.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098440
    "By which you mean get blind-sided when she takes charge and shuts both of us down before we can say anything?"


    "What? I am genre-savvy, you know. We both know who's going to wear the pants in our respective relationships with your daughter, and it isn't either of us."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098441

    Oh hell no, we're not doing this sitcom-y BULLSHIT.

    Yes, we find your daughter attractive. Yes, we do want to make love to her. No, we do not intend to leave her after doing so. We think. Polygamy may or may not be needed.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098449
    I would do it, but to be fair I have no idea how to go about doing that.

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:15 No.9098455
    I meant to write "hear".
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098457
    No it's not that, I just like to ensure my continued existence.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098459
    I'm saying I would not have a fling with your daughter.
    Were I to enter into a relationship with her, it would be fulfilling and meaningful.
    I think far to highly of her to do anything less.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098460
    I don't want to force something sir. I mean, I do like her, you have a wonderful daughter.

    (Oh god, it's the father/boyfriend conversation all over! Except with an even more real chance of death!)
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098461
    Yes. Yes I do. But it's not that I JUST want to sleep with your daughter. I care about her. And I care about you. Out of respect for you, I have held back. I want your approval first.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098467
    "I think she's the most beautiful woman in the world, someone I don't deserve. I love her, I respect her, and I want what she wants. If she asked for you to cut my balls off, I'd let you.

    Although I really hope she didn't ask for that."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098469

    Reginald shakes his head and smiles. "Young master, it is not like that. I am your butler, I would not wish to harm you. But I am not a young man. One day I will be gone, and my daughter's husband must be strong enough to protect her. If you can defeat me in single combat. . . hand to hand. . . without killing me. . . by the time the month is over, you will have my blessing to ask my daughter to marry you."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:16 No.9098473
         File1270876604.jpg-(333 KB, 864x1080, 1269059598719.jpg)
    333 KB
    You're right.

    We broke out of hell.

    We are officially a man and a half.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:17 No.9098486

    Then I hope you do not sabotage my CQC training.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:17 No.9098488
    "You do realize that pulling the male equivalent of the 'Does this dress make me look fat?' line of questioning is a low blow, right?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:17 No.9098492
    "What, you haven't figured it out yet?" *wink at him seductively*
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:17 No.9098494

    "It's not the attractiveness that terrifies us, it's the way we freeze like a deer in the fucking headlights when she tilts her head one way and laughs."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:17 No.9098497

    ALL OF IT!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:18 No.9098511


    "You're rushing to conclusions."

    "You know as well as I do that I need to sleep with three maids before the month expires. And I'm not nearly stupid enough to make Samantha one of those three."

    "Once this madness of my inheritance is over with...I'll be able to commit. For the short time that God allows me, anyway."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:18 No.9098513
    XP TIME!!! Raise skill or athletics to three! Challenge Reg to another knife fight!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:18 No.9098522
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:18 No.9098528
    Accept. Raise stats
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:18 No.9098532

    IT'S ON.

    Get scientist chick on the task of re-sizing Carmine's power armor. FUCKING STAT.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:19 No.9098535

    Goddamn it, show some patience. We're only on day 6.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:19 No.9098536
    Oh, sweet. So we just need to grind some xp. Awesome!

    Okay... Wacky quest hijinks. well, we should just bang everyone else before the final boss (Reginald) then.

    Although, it is COMPLETE bullshit that he's being a total dick here. His daughter wants it, he knows it, he knows we're going to have her, and he can go fuck a sock for all I care.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:19 No.9098549
    Oh, and let me remind you of Reginald's stats.

    Athletics: 6
    Affection: 1
    Skill: 4
    Cunning: 6
    Luck: 3
    Will: 7

    Super Evasion (Can negate an attack by taking 1d6 Stress).
    TACTICAL GENIUS HURR HURR (Always has reinforcements/equipment prepared ahead of time).
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:19 No.9098555

    We're not going to get anywhere doing nothing. Let's train, BITCH!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:19 No.9098556
    This sounds like a good idea.

    But I'm beginning to think we're going to be having a much harder time achieving our harem end now...

    Ah well, we'll burn that bridge when we cross it. We're only a fifth of the way through.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:20 No.9098560
    Fathers get to be total dicks about their daughters. It's a classic plotline, dude, don't knock it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:20 No.9098563

    A maid a day keeps the fleshlight away!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:20 No.9098564
    we'll need a lot more than 3.
    Reginald is the bonus boss after final.
    Once we have slept with three girls and the will is fulfilled, we must defeat him to get the extra good ending.
    He's the Ballos of this game.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:20 No.9098573
    Screw that, we have a good ol' fashion fistfight. He is manly as hell. We WILL be just as manly when that time comes around. We shouldn't rush to battle right now, we rolled horribly last time and our CQC lesson was mostly "How NOT to do CQC."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098577

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098579
    "In that case, one other important question.

    I can agree to not make a move on her for a month. I care enough about her feelings and your opinion to fight off my physical desires there.

    But can we both agree that you won't murder me if she's the one who makes the first move? Because as much as I respect you, I'm not going to crush Samantha's feelings by rejecting her. Your opinion matters to me, but hers matters more."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098581
    Super Evasion
    Will: 7

    Oh fuck.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098585
    The best way to gain experience is by fighting someone who is stronger than you.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098589

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098591
    Does magic count as hand to hand if you use it buff yourself?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:21 No.9098595
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:22 No.9098602
    Get science chick to work on some massive geneboosts STAT
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:22 No.9098606
    We should be able to take out Reginald by the end of the week.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:22 No.9098607

    You aren't even trying anymore.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:22 No.9098610
    I'd modify those terms. "I defeat you, PERIOD. Not on your terms, or your ground. No warrior worth a damn lets his opponent dictate the terms of battle."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:23 No.9098616
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:23 No.9098617
    Or we do this the anime style and train under him and ultimately go up against him to prove that we have become his equal.

    We're not trying to best Reginald here, it's not life or death. Not anymore, anyways. We just want to prove that we're more than strong enough for Samantha.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:23 No.9098623
    Well put.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:23 No.9098632
    For those who don't understand, Reginald can negate an attack every turn by taking 1d6 Stress, and he can absorb 70 Stress before it has any negative side effects.

    Basically, we're looking at around 20 rounds of combat before we can actually start hitting him.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098641
    Ehhhh... I dunno guys. What if something better comes along? It's not even been a week. we might be able to get something better than Samantha here.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098648
         File1270877063.png-(164 KB, 225x350, 34730.png)
    164 KB

    I am suddenly reminded of a certain baseball game.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098651
    Reginald is our master, and the final boss.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098652
    we should get Jehanne to train us. She'll be impressed over our muscle growth being a size queen and whatnot.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098656
    If that happens, that happens.

    But the reward is so much sweeter if you have to fight for it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098659
    Again, magic/poison will be necessary in this fight.

    He is a man. He would not expect us to go halfway for love.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:24 No.9098661
    Don't bother with Athletics, it's where he's strong.

    Boost our Affection and our Luck. Maybe Cunning too, maybe Will. But Affection and Luck are paramount.

    Boost our Affection high enough and we can channel The Power Of Love to a degree beyond anything Reggie's Tactical Genius can withstand. And Luck gives us a better chance of pulling it off.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:25 No.9098665
    And we've be a better man by honoring his terms and still managing to best him. He fought with our father and served him before he served us. The least we can do is respect him that much.

    We might be a fa/tg/uy but we're not a /b/tard, goddamnit.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:25 No.9098666

    That's why this "best me in hand-to-hand combat" shit can go straight to hell. Point out that no warrior fights on his enemies terms if he's worth a tin shit.

    And if we can't do that, we cheat and cheat hard any goddamn way.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:25 No.9098670

    In that case?

    We lose to Reginald and don't get to marry Samantha. He keeps being our butler, she keeps being our head maid.

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:25 No.9098671

    So, to beat Reginald, we nede:

    A) Uberdefenses
    B) A way to make his stress spike

    We have /one/ bit of information that will achieve B, but then we never get Samantha, and he will fucking kill us.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:25 No.9098678
    Lets go learn that transformation magics now. We can turn Kat into a girl and be able to become godzilla!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:26 No.9098684
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    >implying our uncle was honorable
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:26 No.9098688
    True. It's not like we'll be permanently stuck with Samantha. Also, she's easy enough to distract. She won't be able to get in the way of our loinal conquistadoring.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:26 No.9098689
    We are no warrior, we are a gentleman.
    Or at least we're trying to be.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:26 No.9098693
    So. . . accept on his terms, or would you rather do the "on my terms" thing?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:26 No.9098701
    On his terms
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:27 No.9098705

    To be as badass as Reginald, we need a suit. Do we have a suit?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:27 No.9098715
    Accept his.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:27 No.9098718
    You know what, fuck the rest of /tg/.

    I'm sticking with his terms.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:28 No.9098728

    make plans with both paladin chick and angry marine chick to train.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:28 No.9098730


    As a warrior, he'll understand this perfectly.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:28 No.9098735
    Bring up >>9098579 before accepting.

    >>9098661 is our strategy to beat him. Trying to beat him Athletics against Athletics is just asking for a Bad End Flag.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:28 No.9098739

    Yeaaahhh, we're boned. Quick, call upon our super nerdity to quickly browse TV Tropes and some manga sites to find anything that'll give us an edge!

    Oh, and stick with his terms, it'll probably make him approve of you more.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:28 No.9098743
    We are a low down munchkinizing demon fucking terminal illness faking nerd raping fa/tg/uy.

    I don't know what you're talking about, but me? I say we think laterally, and not play at being some honorable prissypants. Would we be the kind of guy to charge the gunline with a lance? No. We'd be the guy in the fucking tank.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:29 No.9098755

    He's a badass ex-SAS fucker. He'd think we were a pussy otherwise.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:29 No.9098766
    We still have a harem to assemble... but in any case, we need to keep his respect and unlock Samantha. This still achieves both.

    Agree to his terms.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098773
    On a warrior's terms; no honor.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098774
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098781

    fucking seriously. This is REGINALD. Without consulting his stats, fucking consider the mad shit we have seen him do. CONSIDER IT. CONSIDER IT GENTLEMEN.

    WE ARE BONED. Even with power armor to match his athletics, his cunning is SHIT HOT. and the will + evasion thing is fucking insane.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098789
    His terms.
    He's been nothing if not a bro and I still feel bad about the alien thing.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098790
    Agree to his terms.

    Loophole the fuck out of them.

    Offer an extra share of our inheritence to Alicia if she helps us think of loopholes in the terms of his challenge.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:30 No.9098791

    We need to train with just about everyone so we know enough to pull it off.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098797
    do not forget what has taken us this far- sick, twisted deviance.
    >> sukhoi !KJHro3/ISM 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098802
    Challenge him to a game of Ro-Sham-Bo
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098805
    Sam should know her father's techniques better than anyone...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098806
    His terms. Why bother fighting him to prove we are worthy of his daughter and then do so in a dishonorable manner.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098809
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    >Faked a terminal illness for sympathy.
    >Tricked the guy's daughter into getting raped by aliens to steal their technology.
    >Forced a demon girl into slavery so that you could fuck her.
    >Thinking about forcing a paladin to break her vows to fuck her.
    >Just raped a nerd girl.

    Oh /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:31 No.9098810
    Lets spend the 30 xp to buff our skill skill and start studying magic to give a an extra edge against the fights to pursue.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:32 No.9098817

    We have plenty of time to work on becoming an uber badass that can compete, and potentially defeat, Reginald. We will work on this while going about our other duties.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:32 No.9098823
    Hey, no one ever said a gentleman had to be a moralfag.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:32 No.9098832
    Nah, she helps us kick his ass, she gets her precious card back.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:32 No.9098833

    You have a very strange definition of rape.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:33 No.9098838
    Seems the conversation is still going. I'll let it continue for a bit.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:33 No.9098843
    We can use alien technology to augment ourselves once sci-bitch produces some serious results.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:33 No.9098848
    >Forced a demon girl into slavery so that you could fuck her.
    No, we forced her into slavery for trying to kill us and because some of us are too pussy to kill the evil(literally) bitch.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:33 No.9098853
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    >Not a moralfag
    >Not using the demon loli to solve our problems
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:34 No.9098856
    If push comes to shove I'm sure we could randomly blurt out, "I WANT YOU INSIDE ME, REGGIE!"

    I mean, we've jerked off to Sonic boning Tails and masturbate first damn thing we get up. We're going to be a manly man but we're still going to be a disgusting one.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:34 No.9098861
    Yeah! fucking her will come later!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:34 No.9098863

    And then tells him about the alienrape.

    No, we're keeping that card. But we can offer her other things to improve her lot in life in exchange for her help.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:34 No.9098876
    Well GM, what would agreeing to his terms rule out I mean? That has a lot to do with it. What exactly do you mean by one-on-one hand to hand combat?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098878
         File1270877702.png-(436 KB, 565x800, 1206605517493.png)
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    Where's the orky waifu?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098885
         File1270877712.jpg-(38 KB, 365x450, what_is_this_faggot_tree.jpg)
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    What is with the sudden influx of faggotry?

    Oh, euro/tg/ is waking up. Maybe we should end the quest for today?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098886
    you might as well call it, I don't think we're gonna get anywhere.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098889
    Then we can learn magic to further boost ourself.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098894
    Well, just that. One on one. Hand to hand. No weapons.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:35 No.9098895

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:36 No.9098900
    We didn't force her or the paladin and we didn't rape anyone.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:36 No.9098905
         File1270877786.jpg-(171 KB, 485x553, ConstableColin.jpg)
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    ...What the fuck did I just read?

    Isn't this shit more up /jp/'s alley?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:36 No.9098907
    As we play we must be observant! We must kill the old man before he becomes a problem! Or clone him and watch the fireworks.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:36 No.9098909
    I never agreed to that part. I think we should exploit the bitch.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:36 No.9098916
    >Forced a demon girl into slavery so that you could fuck her

    Actually once Alicia went loli on us a whole bunch of us said we shouldn't fuck her. Maybe pick on her and act like she really is a little girl, but she's apparently out of the question. Then again, I assume that group is the same one that doesn't want to fuck Kat before turning her true female.

    >Just raped a nerd girl.
    She was begging for it, sir. Literally. I suggest you go read the last thread again. She was the one who wanted to sex us up first, we just obliged because really, who wouldn't?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:37 No.9098922
    With no shirts?
    And Samantha tied up to a bomb?
    On top of a METAL GEAR?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:37 No.9098925
    You know this is only about marriage. Didn't say jack about her jumping in the sack with us.

    Just saying.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:37 No.9098928

    Aight. We agree.

    And our demon loli finds ways to abuse those terms.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:37 No.9098933
    With Carmine's Power Armor on hand for reverse-engineering, and other related advantages, we might match Reginald for Athletics, and match him via Cunning, but how the FUCK do we beat his SICK willpower and special ability?

    His "deal" is bullshit. Fight like we have always fought- recklessly pursuing devious lateral thinking. Fight like Reggie himself will fight- unfairly as fucking possible.

    He's a bro, yes. But he also beat us fucking senseless and we haven't yet laid a hand on his darling girl.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:37 No.9098940
    The nerd girl was fine with it, she initiated it even.
    She only made us stop when she realized the device would activate.
    But yeah, that's /tg/
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:38 No.9098942
    Reginald nods. "I'll agree to this as long as you'll allow me to try and make sure, within reason, that I am almost always there to. . . chaperone you two."

    He closes up his book and nods to you. "And now it is late, young master. Time for you to go to bed. You have an early day tomorrow."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:38 No.9098943
    also someone needs to archive
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:38 No.9098945
    I think we can beat him, but we'll have to fight dirty. Get our stats up a good bit, and forcibly max out his stress.

    Unless his stress explosion just makes him more violent...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:38 No.9098955
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    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:39 No.9098961
    >Then again, I assume that group is the same one that doesn't want to fuck Kat before turning her true female.

    Sorry to disappoint you, I'm in the pædophile camp but disgusted by the idea of fucking the trap. I don't have a problem with playing along if other people enjoy it, though.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:39 No.9098974
    >Faked a terminal illness for sympathy.

    Hang on, when did this happen?
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:39 No.9098975
    That's a good question. You might want to research his Stress Explosion.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:39 No.9098977
    This is acceptable for now. I don't think we're quite ready to make a decision regarding Samantha for endgame.

    As for now, we've gotta talk to our other maids. They've been neglected all day!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:40 No.9098990
    Lock the door when we go to bed. It won't keep Felicia out of course, but hopefully anyone else won't interrupt.

    And on that note, we should look into soundproofing the house.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:40 No.9098992

    >OP allows us to postpone the details of the deathmatch

    This man knows how to manage game flow. Observe. Fucking observe, gentlemen.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:40 No.9098993
         File1270878046.gif-(566 KB, 360x359, FUUUCCCKKK.gif)
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    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:40 No.9098995
    No idea, one anon suggested it and Goshu went with it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:41 No.9099001
    he can block one attack per turn.
    Learn to punch twice per turn.
    Problem sort of solved.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:41 No.9099005

    I'd love to let ours explode into a blood-crazed frenzy the moment his does.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:41 No.9099006
    What are our current stats anyway?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:41 No.9099010

    Yes, this. Check on other maids before bed.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:42 No.9099019
    clearly we'll have to fake a miraculous recovery when (and if) we win the fight. On the bright side, we seem pretty good at bullshitting our way through things so far.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:42 No.9099021
    I'm currently re-reading last thread's details of the date. It is so. amazingly. D'AAAAWWWWW

    also, are all threads archived?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:42 No.9099023
    can we just reticon this?
    It had no affect on the plot and just came from some random troll post.
    Nobody really wanted it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:42 No.9099025
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:42 No.9099026
    Fuck that, go research magic before bed.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099029
    The trap wants to be a real girl. I'm in the camp of simply helping her out for the sake of being nice about it. If it's possible to do so safely, that is.

    Quite frankly, this anon is likely in the minority in that respect.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099030
    why don't we just let felicia in to begin with and then log the door
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099033
    We haven't talked to our paladin maid or carmine pretty much since we first came back out of hell! We should fix this.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099037

    Funny you should ask: it's getting a bit late, so I'm going to wrap up this thread soon. Quest will continue at some point, probably not tomorrow: most likely either Sunday or Tuesday of next week.

    Your current stats are:

    60 XP
    Athletics: 2 -> 3 30 XP
    Affection: 2 -> 3 30 XP
    Skill: 2 -> 3 30 XP
    Cunning: 2 -> 3 30 XP
    Luck: 1 -> 2 20 XP
    Will: 2 -> 3 30 XP

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099038
    You know what would raise his stress? Making out with his daughter once on the field of battle. Or otherwise making sure she WANTS us to best her father and gaining her assistance. And he won't always negate attacks anymore than we would try and weasel magic into not being a weapon.
    But he's cunning 6 and knows our uncle. He damn well knows we're going to try and trick him somehow. If we do it well, then it will be acceptable. Especially if Sam is the one that helps us tilt things in our favor.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099040

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099044
    Not sure. Somebody earlier was requesting an archive.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:43 No.9099047
    I agree. A quick maid visit is in order.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:44 No.9099050
    I'm sure we could just say we've become so man (and SCIENCE!) through beating him that disease just can't affect us anymore.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:44 No.9099054
    I think that's two threads ago.
    Last thread was not D'AWWW.
    More bow-chick-a-wow-wow.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:44 No.9099055
    She is a CAT NINJA. It doesn't matter where we put her, she'll go where she wants.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:44 No.9099060

    Could you be so kind and make a twitter account or something to keep us up to date when you plan to continue?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:45 No.9099067
    random event, random loot, and cunning.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:45 No.9099070
    You can visit two of your maids before you go to bed. Which ones?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:45 No.9099072
    level up luck and skill maybe?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:45 No.9099075
    I would say up Luck and Will.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:45 No.9099079
    CARMINE and then felicia to bring her to bed with us
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099085
    yeah, that may be better
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099086
    We've already died once, point is moot now.(I'm not even sure if we actually revived yet. We may just be a demon from hell now, especially considering that we woke up in physical form in hell.)
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099088
    Luck and skill
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099090
    We should upgrade our athletics and luck.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099093

    Kat and Sam
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099102
    Jehanne and Alicia

    Need to inform them of the contract being in effect at the least and they are our least interacted with.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:46 No.9099103
    Where did you get that from? Here type is Lolita / Lolita.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099112
    Alicia to try and get her to neutral.

    Kat to get more dirt on Samantha. If we're going >>9099038's route we need to know her intricately.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099115
    Jehanne, then bring Koyomi to bed.
    get to 2.5/3 schmexes.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099118

    Kat and Jehane.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099119
    Jehanne and Sister Carmine.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099121

    Carmine and Kyona (the scientist chick!)
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:47 No.9099129
    luck and skill
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:48 No.9099140
    Carmine and Jehanne
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:48 No.9099147
    Also, you know we've technically already died once. We were perfectly correct about us dying soon when we said it then.
    While we've suggested continuing it, we haven't outright said we're still about to die I don't think since returning from Hell. On a helicopter. Hmmm, we're not still all ghosty or anything, right? We can't go between walls if we concentrate or such?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:48 No.9099148

    Kyo went back to the university to get her SCIENCE equipment. She'll be back tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:49 No.9099158
    This. Do 'er proper.

    And introduce her to our own anal probe...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:49 No.9099172
    Kat first for intel, then Koyomi to see if she's interested in cuddling / maybe more sex for the night
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:50 No.9099180
    she's not back yet?
    where is she staying?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:50 No.9099182
    jehanne and FUCKING CARMINE
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:50 No.9099183
    I bet we are the demons. The other mortal souls in hell were bodiless, we had a body there.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:50 No.9099193
    If our Scientist is Out Of Town, then Kat for intel and then Jehanne for... whatever.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:51 No.9099197

    This is true. We should ask Alicia how cosmological metaphysics work within the context of the physical soul.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:51 No.9099202
    the conditions protected us from demonic magic, remember?
    We would have died once the will was up and we hadn't fucked 3 maids, but that doesn't matter now since we killed the demon.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:52 No.9099221
    It protected us from demons doing stuff to us, not from becoming one...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:53 No.9099231
    Also we already died.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:53 No.9099233
    Jehanne, to mention that dating between maid and butler isn't forbidden among our employees. Also, some training may be in order (we're going to need to draw from all our maids to eventually face Reginald, even if Sam makes the move on us and we just need to survive the fight in an acceptable way).
    Then off to Kat, to mention you're making efforts to help out, but that you still haven't found anything near certain. Still, you're keeping her in mind. Make sure things are going well.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:53 No.9099237
    God, I fucking hate Twitter, but I guess you have a point.


    If you follow this twitter thing or whatever, all you'll get is, like, maybe me calling you a fucking pervert and telling you I'm gonna continue the fucking quest.

    I'm getting Carmine and Jehanne. Confirm?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:53 No.9099240
    Op, you shouldn't end on thread 13. tis bad luck.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:53 No.9099246

    When you leave hell you get your body back at the gate. Like how prisons check your possessions at the door.

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:54 No.9099251

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:54 No.9099259
    Science won't work, we need to turn to magic for Kat. Let's start researching.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:55 No.9099271
    Jehanne - plant seeds of interest in Reginald, talk about training
    Kat - tell her to keep an eye on other maids (especially Alicia and Koyomi), let her know we are trying to find a way to make her and true her
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:55 No.9099272
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:55 No.9099273
    >For a fucking porn quest

    This is the saddest god damn thing that /tg/ has done so far.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:55 No.9099281
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099283
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099285
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099288
    Nope, else uncle would be running around raping our maids.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099295
    Don't worry about it, you superstitious fuck. It'll cancel out the fucking black cat I walked across yesterday.

    You're fucking telling me.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099298
    what about Kyo
    Isn't she back already?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:56 No.9099299
    No, the couple hundred write and roll monster girl fap threads are far, far, worse.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:57 No.9099306

    >>9099060 here
    Thank you very much.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:57 No.9099322
    We didn't even get sex until what, like, Part 5? 6? 7?

    If anything we've been on a lucky streak every since we got out of Hell. Felicia wanted our dick and then Koyomi wanted our dick.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)01:57 No.9099324
    You find Sister Carmine. She's pretty much incoherent.

    "FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCCK FUCKERS GOATFUCK!" she screams as she punches the sand with her power fists. You see that portions of the beach have been vitrified by the power fist strikes, leaving glassy knuckle prints in the sand.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:58 No.9099327
    these threads are both funny and well written
    I'd say their low point is when we actually have sex...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:58 No.9099328
    Come on, every single touhou thread is a hundred times more pathetic than this.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:58 No.9099334
    Affection and Luck.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:59 No.9099345
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:59 No.9099346
    Can you tell us what the fuck we are, whether undead or demon? We NEVER actually revived.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:59 No.9099347
    who suggested Carmine?
    worst maid ever.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)01:59 No.9099348

    ask if she ever calms down and give her a small smack on the ass.

    or a huge, wind-up smack. whatever.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099361
    as if she would even notice with all that power armor and rage
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099362
    We need this bitch to settle down somehow.

    How do you cool off an Angry Marine?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099365
    "Hey. How's it going."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099367
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099368
    Offer her a brew. Or whatever we can offer her, I guess.

    Always Angry, All The Time! doesn't necessarily mean rage. A quiet, melancholy anger while sipping a cold one can also work on occasion.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:00 No.9099374
    I know of a good psychologist you should see. He can help you with anger management. Anyway, I need you to help me train in the future.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:01 No.9099384

    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:01 No.9099385
    Don't get too angry. Slaanesh will get you.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:01 No.9099388
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:01 No.9099392
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:02 No.9099399
    Don't you mean Khorne...?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:02 No.9099404
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:02 No.9099406

    Ask her what the hell is wrong now.

    If she's wearing powered armor, tell her she needs a new uniform.

    If she isn't, >>9099348
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:03 No.9099412
    tell her that her anger issues have no business existing now that she has proven half-eldar can punch demons in the face most righteously.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:03 No.9099414
    It's more of a righteous fury.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:03 No.9099420
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    I was planning to have her left in hell punching demons, but /tg/ wanted to go after her. :P


    Carmine sits down on a rock, glaring at the ocean. "I spent six fucking hours cleaning this damn beach then the tide brought in some more fucking goddamn seaweed," she snarls. "Fucking nigger cockbite ocean."

    Looking up and down the beach, you realize that she hasn't just been cleaning the trash, she's been cleaning everything. The entire beach has been scoured of almost anything messy. Including every single living thing.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:03 No.9099421
    Ask her to pop the power armor and step out. Leave the angry behind in it.

    Then we talk to her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:03 No.9099422
    Slaanesh is basically the god of excess, and excessive anger, well...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:04 No.9099432

    Carmine? Please don't purge the tourists.

    Wait, hang on, aren't we supposed to be running a business at some point?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:05 No.9099445
    So, our beach is at 5/5 now, right?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:05 No.9099451

    It's a private beach. Damn straight she purges the tourists.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:05 No.9099453
    There's no need to be angry. You did a great job. Relax and enjoy the view. See how nice the beach looks now? A little seaweed is no big deal.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:06 No.9099458
    A beach is made of things besides sand. Seaweed and plants and animals are supposed to be here. Just garbage and stuff needs to be kept out.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:06 No.9099460
    Tell her that living things are fine, and should be left alone. Except for jellyfish, which should be carefully returned to the ocean to reduce the risk of anybody stepping on one and getting stung.

    Consider introducing sea turtles to eat the jellyfish.

    Also, have her stand down on the angry. She's Lofn, so angry probably isn't really where her true talents lie.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:06 No.9099466

    Here's an odd thing to do.

    Pat her on her shoulder and say "Good job. Go ahead and head in for the night."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:07 No.9099484
    It's actually around the same. It's very clean, but also eerily quiet, like something out of Silent Hill.


    "Look, just quit trying to fucking get in my fucking pants and tell me what you fucking fuckknocking want already, you cockbite," Carmine growls. She pops open a compartment in her glove and lights it up with her hand flamer's pilot light.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:07 No.9099487
    You know what:

    Have her pop the armor. We'll go for a swim together. Let her splash around a bit, relax, start getting over her abandonment and inferiority issues...
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:08 No.9099503
    lights up a cigar with her flamer :P sorry.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:09 No.9099519

    "Well, I really do want to get in your pants. But aside from that, just felt like we hadn't gotten to know each other much since we got out of hell. And...I wanted to see how the beach was doing."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:09 No.9099522
    Geez, just trying to help you relax. Anyway, I need you to help me train in the future. I have to beat Reginald and I have a long way to go.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:10 No.9099529
    right, like she's agree to that.
    We should move onto visiting Koyomi.
    Can we just ignore Carmine until we need her in a fight?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:10 No.9099533
    "Just checking in. You've done good. Head on in."
    >> Jabberwock 04/10/10(Sat)02:11 No.9099542
    Have her instruct us in the ways of purging xenos and heretics.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:12 No.9099563
    "You to chill out, relax, enjoy things a bit more...

    After all, you're a maid now. Not a Space Marine. Not a half-eldar. Not the Demon of Wrath. Just a girl, that happens to be a maid. So enjoy that. I'm not going to leave you behind, regardless of what you do. But I would like to see you a bit happier. A face like your deserves to have something that it can smile about."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:12 No.9099574
    We want you to settle the fuck down, you keep fucking breaking shit and causing problems.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:13 No.9099576

    "I want to learn how to unleash a tidal wave of homocidal face-fucking fury, and obliterize every niggerhumper in my path."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:13 No.9099585
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    Last thread of the night.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:14 No.9099595
    Carmine is awesome simply for the comedic value of... well, herself.

    Also, having a power-armor equipped personification of ultimate fury on one's side is useful.

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