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    244 KB Maid Quest Part V: A MAID IN HELL Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:33 No.9055966  
    You are a young man who has suddenly come into an unexpected inheritance: a rather large mansion and a sizeable amount of money. However, your rather eccentric uncle has put a secret rider in his will: in order to inherit the money, you must:

    1. Repair the rather old and decaying house.
    2. Hire a full staff of maids to upkeep it.
    3. Have sex with at least three of them.

    Mansion Status:
    Facilities: Beachfront property
    Kitchen: Decent (2 of 5)
    Decor: Poor (1 of 5)
    Gardens: Poor (1 of 5)
    Repair: PERFECT (6 of 5)
    Beach: Average (3 of 5)

    Reginald, Your Butler (Devoted)
    Samantha, Your Head Maid (Devoted) - LOVE
    Katherine, the redheaded trap-kun (Warm)
    Alicia, the tall, buxom glasses brunette (Hostile)
    Felicia, the cute catgirl (Hostile)

    19 XP

    This is now day ?? of 30.

    You are in Hell.

    WHAT DO?
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:33 No.9055973
    >>9054492 prior thread is here.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:33 No.9055977
    Say, "A match...MAID in Hell?"

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:34 No.9056000
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:35 No.9056017

    I'd like to take stock- do we have any inventory? Are we naked? Do we have bitching abs? Am I Patrick Swayze ghost style, or Frighteners ghost style?
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:35 No.9056022
    Masturbate using your mind only.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056029
    Shout out to the paladin that you'd appreciate a bit of help, if they can spare the time from demonslaying.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056030

    We're a spirit. I don't see how we can hurt ourselves by trying to rip the shackles out of the wall.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056034


    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056035
    Call that Paladin over so you can get out of these chains. Bondage may turn you on, but now isn't the time for that.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056036

    If we can reach our dick, do this.

    At the same time, call out for the knight to help us. Maybe s/he'll let us out of these chains so we can fap more easily.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056038
    now would be an excellent time to see if we are limber enough for autofellatio
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056039

    After making a snarky comment, you think about it for a moment. . . I guess it is traditional.

    Since you have no pants on, it's not hard to get them off. You quickly start to masturbate to the sight of this knight cleaving through demon after demon.

    It's a bit hard to get aroused with all these hellfires burning around you, but what the hell. You've masturbated in worse conditions. You think.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056040
    Shout to the swordwielder.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056046
    Masturbate of course
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056047
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    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:36 No.9056053
    I fucking love you.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:37 No.9056058
    Call the swordsman over. He works for us now.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:37 No.9056060
    >19 year old nerd
    >bitching abs

    not likely. i think we have like 1 athleticism.

    call out to the paladin, something witty. tell him (her?) we could use a hand when she gets a minute.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:37 No.9056062

    Now that that's out of the way, lets get to KILLING THE FUCK OUT OF HELL.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:37 No.9056066
    what ARE our stats anyway?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:37 No.9056075
    Finish wanking, then call to the paladin for assistance.

    Hope it's a female paladin.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:38 No.9056080
    Do Alicia and Felicia really count as being in our employ any more? I think killing us and sending us to hell should count as reasonable grounds for termination
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:38 No.9056081

    You scream out for help to the figure in armor. They look across at you, in shock. You hear them mutter something about, "What the hell. . ." before suddenly turning around and diving through the masses of demons.

    The demons manage to dive on top of the armored figure, dogpiling it, before they suddenly explode away in a burst of holy light as the Paladin raises its sword and flings them away. Radiant Damage FTW.
    >> Shota Primarch 04/08/10(Thu)03:38 No.9056084
    Hire three 'maids' aka, prostitutes, sleep with them while wearing 14 condoms, fire them immediately, apologize to the rest of the staff for your actions and explain how your uncle was a sick fuck. Request they continue doing the excellent work they have been doing.

    Done and done.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:38 No.9056090
    Is the paladin a hammerdin, or one of those dumbasses that boosts thorns and thinks it's awesome?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:38 No.9056098
    Saying we could use a hand while we are furiously masturbating could have some bad consequences.
    >> Dungeon Master 04/08/10(Thu)03:39 No.9056109
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    Evil energy is like evil force. Change its direction, and it changes to good!
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:39 No.9056110
    I will be disappoint if the paladin doesn't try to RIP AND TEAR Alicia upon the sight of her HUGE...um...guts.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:39 No.9056113
    Like that would stop us from considering them as potential cock docks!
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:39 No.9056118

    Feels good man.

    Finish what we're doing and put our pants back on (its easy, since we don't have any).

    Then start shouting helpful tips for the paladin. Such as "OH FUCK LOOK OUT THERE'S ONE BEHIND YOU" and "LOOK OUT HE HAS A PITCHFORK" and the like.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:40 No.9056121
    I say it
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:40 No.9056125
    Paladin will be new maid. New, awesome maid. Possibly 63'd Doomgal.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:40 No.9056130
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:40 No.9056139

    You should have been here way in the first thread; we already have a staff and are currently unable to hire more maids.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:41 No.9056142
    Whistle "Always Look On The Bright Side of Life" while we wait.

    What the hell else CAN we do? Apart from masturbate?

    For that... we need to tell Alicia that to her face. Preferably in a Schwarzenegger-style pre-kill one-liner.

    "You're fired."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:41 No.9056144

    Request freedom and arms, we must escape this place.

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:42 No.9056158
    Whaaaaaaaaaaat? Kill her? But she's totally hot!

    We just need to work out a better policy vis-a-vis the whole damnation business.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:42 No.9056161
    wait for the DM to give us something meaningful to react to
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:43 No.9056177
    Sounds more like a zealadin by previous description, but damn that last move sounds like a hammerdin...
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:43 No.9056180
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    You call out advice. It's not all that helpful, but it makes you feel good anyway.

    Once the Paladin finishes slaying the last demon in the area, it takes its huge sword and flicks the sword off the blade. By the way, the blade is about as long as she is. Huge fucking sword.

    And yes, it is a she. You can tell because she's not wearing armor on her midriff and her breast plate is shaped to her chest, like all women's armor.

    She takes off her helmet and tucks it under an arm. "What in Bahamut's name are you doing here?" she wonders. "I was not aware that Lady Asmoday had any prisoners."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:43 No.9056182
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    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)03:43 No.9056187
    While we wait, I'm gonna put it out there:

    The chances of Alicia and Felicia coming home are... well, not high.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:43 No.9056188
    Hmm. I suppose you're right.

    But she does have a LOT of apologizing to do.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:44 No.9056205
    "She does. Now can you please cut me loose? These chains are starting to chafe."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:44 No.9056207

    Ask for assistance in escaping hell, once we are back in our home, we can explain fully.

    Request a firearm or blade, and armor, if possible. Then GTFO.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056213
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    flicks the BLOOD off the blade. SLOW down me.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056215
    "Oh yeah, naw, I'm really important to, uh, the whole, y'know...Heaven thing. Do you happen to have some pants?"
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056218

    "It's a long story, but we can talk once you free me and I'm armed!"

    When she approaches ask her name.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056220
    Forcing an apology might not be the best idea. She does have dirt on us. Dirt that will make our butler very, very cross.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056222
    FFFFF Asmoday. Female Asmodious. we're fucking boned.

    "Long story short. my ancestors made a deal with the devil, and now they're trying to collect from me for the sins of the father. I honestly believe the sins of the father do not pass down. But i would, if possible, request your aid in our escape as well as offer you (a place to rest/be hired at) once We leave
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056225

    "That bitch killed us! Granted, we shot her catgirl dead, but she attacked first!"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056227
    There was this demon chick, and she killed me after I refused to condemn the souls of all my ancestors back to the 10th century to hell.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:45 No.9056231
    You know, if Alicia's one of those painfully contractual demons, we can keep her working for us based on the terms of our original employment contract. And then troll the fuck out of her. "Oh, how did holy water get into all the incoming pipes here? I'm just as shocked as you are."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:46 No.9056235
    "Nah, killed by a succubus of some sort. And a panther.

    So, what's your party doing down here any
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:46 No.9056239
    "Ah, you see, I've managed to frustrate a demoness. You know, doing the right thing and all that. I've got a trump card over her, and she really wants me dead...er.

    Mind if you give me a hand?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:46 No.9056243
    "Heeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyy good lookin', come out here often?"

    oonts oonts oonts
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:46 No.9056246

    "oh i'm not a prisoner, i'm just here for some tea."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:46 No.9056248
    Tell her we're here due to a family curse and we're trying to save our ancestor's souls from hell. Good, holy stuff. And completely truthful as well!
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:47 No.9056256
    nahhhh. Killed by a succubi who's read too many R.A. Salvatore Forgotten realms books.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:47 No.9056260
    Don't worry, we've read My Balls, we know how to handle demons.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:47 No.9056267
    "Yes. I'm her prisoner because anyone I fuck, is immune to demons."

    roll bluff
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:48 No.9056285

    >>female paladin
    >>lady asmoday
    >>holy shit its the Great Wheel with maids!

    "Is that whose prisoner I am? Fuck. Anyway, some demon with a pet catgirl killed me and I need to get home. Help?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:49 No.9056312
    We're some pervert controlled by /tg/. No maid left behind is our creed. We don't even know if they attacked us of their own free volition.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:50 No.9056321

    "I see." The woman looks skeptical. "I know not of these fire-arms you speak of, but I do have an arming blade you could carry. . . one moment." She takes a deep breath and, with two deft swings of her huge sword, cuts through the chains that bind you. "Better," she says, as you drop to the ground. "And here." She pulls off her cloak and hands it to you. "Cover thy modesty. It seems thou were most foully used by a demon of lust."

    She gestures to the cum all over your thighs.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:50 No.9056331
    She mentioned Bahamut, shes likely a paladin of him, ask for release, if she refuses, play off how Bahamut is extremely compassionate for good things.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:50 No.9056336
    "Whaaaaaaaaa oh yeah, shit, right. Whoops."

    Inspect her closely for blushing.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056353
    Yeah, let's just say that.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056355
    So, you wouldn't happen to have any idea what the best way to get out of here is would you... miss...
    >> Anonymous. 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056359
    Yeah, that five-horned palm demon is a pretty tough customer.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056360
    Thank her. Be very polite.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056367
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    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:51 No.9056368
    if thats Alicia we fucked instead of our masturbation. Thats one Maid down, we havent fired her yet

    Take the cloak, and wear it but don't cover our jizzed thighs. "I prefer to not hide my scars (or whatever). its dishonorable"

    Take the Blade but warn her that you probably suck with it
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:52 No.9056376
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:52 No.9056378

    "Ah. Yes. Used by a lust demon. It was...horrible. Please don't speak of it again or ask us for any details."

    Put on the cloak.

    "Thanks. What's your name?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:52 No.9056380

    We are now armed with a sword. We can now take on the EYE OF TERROR ITSELF! FOR NOTHING IS MORE DEADLY THAN A NERD WITH A BLADE!

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:52 No.9056382
    Wear cloak as a loincloth/kilt, take her spare blade.

    We shall find Alicia, and when we do... she'll beg us to be our slave.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:52 No.9056387

    She looks upon you with disinterest, although she does bite her lower lip and rub the back of her neck, fiddling with her short, blond hair.

    Speaking of which. . .

    Type: Sexy / Pure
    Level: Neutral

    Special: Armor

    Weapons: Giant Sword

    Colors: Blond Hair, Blue eyes, silver armor.

    Athletics: 4
    Affection: 2
    Skill: 3
    Cunning: 2
    Luck: 2
    Will: 1

    Spirit: 10
    Stress: 0

    All other stats unknown.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)03:53 No.9056404

    Ask for a name, ask what her plans are and in return tell her that we must return home. If she would accompany us we would be most grateful. A paladin cannot refuse.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:54 No.9056416

    We learn gunplay from a grizzled British warhero. We learn swordplay from a paladin of Bahamut. We learn playplay from a house full of maids.

    By the end of this month we're going to be fist of the motherfucking north star.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:54 No.9056432
    "Right. What's our plan?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:55 No.9056435
    So, Jehanne, do you have any idea how to get out of here?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:55 No.9056438
    We've gotten burned before.

    "You're...A girl, right? All girl equipment in there, right?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:55 No.9056444

    You take up her sword and put on her cloak. You feel a lot like Conan. It would probably work better if you weren't a fat nerd. But you still feel pretty badass anyway.

    Jehanne, as it turns out her name is, turns towards the hell-tower in the distance, cleaving through the forests of the damned with her sword. "I am knight-errant," she explains, "on a quest to purge my sins and make myself right again in the eyes of my god. In order to do this, I must defeat and slay the Demon Goddess of Lust, Lady Asmoday, in mortal combat, or die trying."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:55 No.9056455
    Express hatred for Tiamat. That should earn a point or two.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)03:56 No.9056468

    Check her for fatigue or injuries. If either are present, tell her to fall back to our house for the time being.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:56 No.9056478
    > playplay

    Youknow, maybe we should try to get them into pnp games in the evenings some nights, when we're trying to interact with all the girls at once. And then show them this thing we found called MAid RPG and see if they want to give it a go.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:56 No.9056479

    "That's some serious shit. What'd you do that requires a jaunt to HELL to make up for?"

    try to guess her level. Paragon tier?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:57 No.9056484
    Knight-errant? Purge her sins? This girl is the jackpot.

    Offer her assistance. Possibly by running distraction for Lady Asmoday.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:57 No.9056488
    "I'm afraid you can't kill her... she's my maid. She's run a bit amuck at the moment, so I will help you to bring her under control."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:57 No.9056490
    "Ah, a Demoness of Lust. Don't worry, my family has... experience in these matters. I'll have your back and trust that you'll have mine. I have some secret "techniques" that I can use; trust me that I know what I'm doing."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:57 No.9056495
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:58 No.9056507

    If we escape, it would be prudent to assume the demon-bitch would come back for us, ergo, if we head back to the mansion, we will have home field advantage for the coming battle, in addition to prep time. Communicate this to Jehanne, ask for her input.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)03:58 No.9056518

    You express hatred for Tiamat. She seems confused, but seems to not and agree with you. She doesn't seem to recognize the name at all. Maybe she's from a setting where Tiamat doesn't exist, or something.

    When you ask her about her sin, she gets very quiet, and rubs the back of her neck, biting her lower lip again. "I do not wish to say," she admits, "for it is most unworthy of a Knight of the Order. Suffice to say. . . there is a reason why I was told to slay a demon of LUST."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056526
    She's not a frakking wizard.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056534

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056538
    Oh hohohohohohooooo.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056540
    It is mortal to make mistakes. no one is infallible
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056543
    Guys, when we killed our self, was the ray-gun disintegrated too? If not... would Alicia have the ray-gun when we get back?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)03:59 No.9056545
    We're demon immune right? We'll be her sheath.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056549
    good thing im not a fat nerd
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056553
    I've already killed her familiar. The fight should be easy now.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056554
    offer assistance on her quest.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056563
    You know, even in the context of that game, that phrase always made me think of strap-ons.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056564
    ... Okay, now we definitely want her around.

    Ask what exactly happened. If she doesn't want to talk about it, don't press the matter, and get to the demon-slaying.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056566
    "Yessss, yes, I sense we share a certain kinship," put on pained expression, look mysteriously.

    Hope for fell wind to blow our cape/kilt around a bit while we nobly stare off in the distance.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:00 No.9056568
    She's still fine as long as she LOVES us before we do it.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:01 No.9056582

    "You saved my life. I am indebted to you, so let me repay you. Because of my ancestor's contract, I cannot be killed by demons. Please, let us go forth and finish your quest together."
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:01 No.9056585

    "Heheh. Tell me how you got here, and I'll do the same. Trust me, there are lots of lust demons running around."

    Think to myself if I know of any settings that was Bahamut but not Tiamat. My nerd-fu is strong, so if not its probably someone's homebrew.

    "Anyway, any plans yet?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:03 No.9056616
    Tahkisis? From dragonlance?

    No, then Bahamut would be Paladin.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)04:04 No.9056632
    no Bahamut in that setting. there is Paladine instead
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:04 No.9056643
    ...letting her see our jizz-coated thighs...
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:04 No.9056647
    Oh fuck me, 4 threads already?

    I though most of you guys didn't like quest threads
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)04:04 No.9056648

    Jehanne sighs.

    "It is too embarassing. . . after we slay the demon, I shall perhaps tell you." (Faction not high enough to trigger this event).

    The two of you continue on towards the tower. There's not too much to do. Aside from a few minor demons that Jehanne easily dispatches with her sword, you have no further encounters.

    You do, however, gain a few XP. You now have a total of 20.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:06 No.9056671
    We must level up our Atletichs trough this ordeal. Get the body of a mortal god!
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:06 No.9056681
    hooray we've almost recouped the earlier loss.

    Wonder Idly if we're a cleric or magic user or something in this setting.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:06 No.9056685
    Do some sparring/training exercises during a lull period so you can help her better.

    Make subtle passes at her during the exchanges.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)04:06 No.9056686
    Strike up conversations about home and past (avoid the Sin) in an attempt to create camaraderie while fighting through hell.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:06 No.9056688

    (Soooo... take her home?)
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:07 No.9056698
    Continue on and try to learn more about Jehanne while travelling/killing demons.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:07 No.9056703

    "So, Lady Asmoday. How much do you know about her, and what kind of defenses has she got? And how are either of us getting home afterward."

    Remind her that we are immune to demons, and that we might be useful as a distraction and/or meat shield.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:07 No.9056705
    How do we improve our stats?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:07 No.9056714

    Do this.

    Sparring might help too.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:08 No.9056716
    you like fishsticks?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:08 No.9056719

    Yes. There are demons after us. We need a maidadin.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:09 No.9056730
    I'd crash, but I want to see if Alicia shows up again. I want to see if we can rules lawyer her into coming back to the mansion, where we can troll/attempt to convert to a good alignment at our leisure.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:09 No.9056731
    Warn her of the surprise fingernail attack.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)04:09 No.9056739
    (As I'm starting to get really damn tired, the thread will end soon for tonight. I will continue it tomorrow afternoon. The Code Word, by the way, is "OONST OONST OONST." If one of you say it when I continue this quest, you will gain a special bonus event.)

    You ask Jehanne about her plan. She shakes her head. "There is not much to be said," she admits. "Lady Asmoday's tower is guarded by three demons. The first, The Mawler, is a demon of gluttony. It devours all in its path and swallows them whole. The second, the Nightmare, is a demon of Sloth. It puts men to sleep and haunts their nightmares. Finally comes the demon of Wrath, the Slayer. I don't think I need to say more about that one."

    "Wouldn't it make more sense to have all three of them together, instead of one after the other?" you ask.

    "You're not a demon or an adventurer, are you? There are rules about these sorts of things," Jehanne says.

    You are reminded of things like "CR" and "Encounter Budgets," and say no more.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)04:10 No.9056761

    You have to get out of Hell first.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)04:11 No.9056769
    ask her if there is a way to contact the material plane. If so. Contact Reginald.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:11 No.9056770
    Ask if she's adverse to cheating and just going up the outside of the tower.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:11 No.9056772
    Go to sleep broseph, you deserve it.

    Congratulations on a wildly successful quest.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:11 No.9056773

    "So, what kind of a world are you from? Not Forgotten Realms shit, I hope?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:12 No.9056789
    When this ends though, when will it come back? I must be there.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:12 No.9056800
    This was the best quest I've seen in a very long time, Goshu. Can't wait for the next installment.

    What time tomorrow afternoon?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:13 No.9056818
    Post this in the next one, OP, so people know what's come before:
    Part 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9047710/
    Part 2: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9050315/
    Part 3: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9052773/
    Part 4: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9054492/
    Part 5: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9055966/
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)04:15 No.9056841

    "Forgotten Realms? How can I be from a realm if it was forgotten? My land is called Pirithia, on the Shining Seas of blah blah blah" obviously some guy's homebrew setting or something. You tone her out as she continues on about the minutiae of a setting, the kind of stuff that a DM usually puts in a 20 page player info packet that no one ever reads.

    As you continue through hell, you finally find yourself approaching the Tower of LUST, the inner sanctum of Lady Asmoday, the Demon Princess of Lust.

    And yes, it looks like a giant brass dildo sticking out of the ground.

    "We must prepare ourselves for battle," Jehanne says. "For her tower is filled with monsters and demons. Cutting them down will be. . ."

    "Can't we just go up the outside?" you ask.


    "Up the outside? You know, avoid all the random encounters."

    Jehane scratches her chin. "I suppose we might as well, at that," she admits.

    "I guess you're not much of a gamer," you point out.

    Jehanne shrugs. She is pointedly not looking at your naked body, by the way, and there is color rising in her cheeks.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:16 No.9056859
    Cover thyself, act shy and pensive.
    >> Reswald !!HB3QBM8WHHJ 04/08/10(Thu)04:16 No.9056861
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056873
    Hang on.

    Maybe we should go through.

    We DO need the exp.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056876
    This is probably the most awesome thing I have seen on the internet in memory. Thank you, Goshujin-sama~!
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056881
    AND we will end the thread here, with you and Jehane about to ascend the Tower of Lust to fight Alicia and slay her for being a bitch. And slaying you. And shit like that.

    As for when this will continue. . . that depends. I will aim for tomorrow afternoonish, around 5 or 6 PST, perhaps before that if possible.

    Until then. . . EXCELSIOR! And other gay nerdy shit.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056884
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056886

    Look at phallic tower. Resist urge to fap.

    We'll sneak ahead of her toward the edge of the tower to see if there are any baddies guarding the outside. If not, we'll wave for her to follow us.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:17 No.9056887
    What's our xp run under anyway? oWoD? Shadowrun? Unknown Armies?

    We've only got 20 xp. If this is DnD...We're boned.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:18 No.9056903
    "We should prepare ourselves. Climbing to the top of this tower will be LONG and HARD. We better pace ourselves or we will get all sweaty and exhausted before the real action starts."
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:18 No.9056905

    Act innocent and unknowing. Rush to in front of her.

    "Are you alright? You look a little flushed! Are you injured?"

    While we do this, hold her arm reassuringly and try to take her temperature by feeling her forehead.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:18 No.9056911

    i liek where this is going... do we get to see battle before you sleep?

    "is- is there anything i can do to help once we're inside?"
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:19 No.9056922
    If only there were h games like this ;~;

    Go to sleep man. you deserve it.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:20 No.9056940

    Ah, well good job then man. I've run a few marathon games and I know that near the end things get difficult, so good show keeping up for so long. Despite what sagefags may think, it's good Quests like this one which keep /tg/ alive.

    Thanks man, I hope to be here soon after you begin tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:21 No.9056958
    Am I the only one who likes the idea of enslaving her with the binding terms of the legal contract she signed to work for you, if she's one of the crazy lawful demons? It has a certain elegance to it. And a level of exploitable cruelty to make her regret ever killing you.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:22 No.9056984
    Dude, I'm pumping for that with a side of "Fuck you until you're lawful good, bitch!" on the side.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:25 No.9057017
    It'll either be the demon or the paladin and maybe its the JUSTICE in me but I think the Paladin girl is hotter.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:25 No.9057020
    I also want our catgirl back. I think she didn't have much choice when she attacked us.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:27 No.9057047
    we vaporized her. I don't think she's coming back.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:27 No.9057053
    Well, sure, if we have to choose, paladin's better.

    But damn it, if we're busting out of Hell, we might as well try for both while we're at it.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:28 No.9057068
    I bet the paladin might be mightily amused by enslaving a greater demon. Just a bit. Make sure you don't go out of the terms outlined though, otherwise ALicia's going to rip and tear into you, unless you've converted her alignment enough by then.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:29 No.9057093
    Maybe she went to hell?
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:32 No.9057134
    did she sign a contract even or is it just an at will "Here's your mop and here's your bucket" kinda deal.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:33 No.9057138
    I think she came from hell, and outsiders don't get to come back.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:34 No.9057158
    No idea, I just like the thought of having a cute catgirl around.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:35 No.9057175
         File1270715746.jpg-(285 KB, 1280x1024, Make Me.jpg)
    285 KB

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:36 No.9057183
    For a formal maid position, in a house of such great history and cultural significance as ours? I bet there was a contract.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:37 No.9057194
    Next time suggest that we replace one of our arms with one from one of the demon lords after slaying them.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:37 No.9057203
         File1270715853.jpg-(16 KB, 276x400, 1269817898965.jpg)
    16 KB
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:38 No.9057212
    Not THAT stupid, please.
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:38 No.9057214
         File1270715900.jpg-(29 KB, 450x300, 1226354888180.jpg)
    29 KB

    What, one of the arms of a lust demon?

    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:39 No.9057227
    On second thought, let's not.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:39 No.9057232
    I don't get it. What anime is this chick from? I'm going to infer she's dumb like a rock, but might be worth a skim on an insomniac night sometime.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:40 No.9057239
    Our ancestor was a wizard!? We have the potential for magic and must start studying magic at once, once we return!
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:43 No.9057289
    >implying all the demons are lust demons
    >having had also mentioned gluttony, sloth, and a third that kills things a lot
    >> Gemini 04/08/10(Thu)04:44 No.9057303

    Yes, but we're in front of a lust demon's tower. And after that we're going home. No other real opportunities I'm afraid.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:46 No.9057351
    I don't want to try amateur bionics here people.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)04:47 No.9057367
    We're going to have to fight and slay the three anyway, might as well hack off a arm and take it back with us.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)10:26 No.9060893
    this quest is thinly veiled fap fiction and poorly written at that.
    >> Anonymous 04/08/10(Thu)12:07 No.9062238
    U mad.

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