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  • File : 1265313735.gif-(244 KB, 400x569, mirkwood01[2].gif)
    244 KB OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:02 No.7922568  
    Hello, everyone. I know it's been a while, but here it is, Elf Murderan' Thread V. Former threads are here:


    Sorry for being gone so long, we had to take a week off on a few occasions due to group members having unavoidable work or class concerns, and aside from that spent the last few sessions mostly muckin' about or doing a dungeon, which I will get to momentarily. Nonetheless, I'm still slightly behind given the next session is coming soon, so thread VI may be up in the next few days (or I could be a filthy liar, and it would take a week)

    Now, as you may recall from last time, I had finally achieved victory in one respect, murdering the Royal Guard, and giving myself plausible deniability...after all, if questioned, I can honestly say I killed him in self-defense. It was unquestionably his corpse found upon the field, and equally unquestionably me who killed him.

    Incidentally, another factor here is time. Many spells, like Raise Dead and certain Divinations, become more difficult to use or fail to function past a certain time limit, so stalling for ingame time is...while boring...something I've been forced to do.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:07 No.7922631
    In a way, I have been lucky so far. I was not fully aware of the Whispers of the Edifice ritual on page 158 of Arcane Power when I committed my murders, but in both cases I was disguised as someone else at the time I committed them. The Royal Guard himself, during his murder, and a generic elvish servant during the death of the Prince.

    I have also held off on sending a...well...a Sending to my mentor, for fear of DM fiat, that she might decide to keep up her "humans are bastards" theme by having him kill me and steal the credit for my deeds.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:08 No.7922655
    Cool, a live elf murdurin' thread!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:10 No.7922673
    Oh wait, aren't these threads really slow, because you go through your transcripts for the best accuracy possible?

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:12 No.7922704
    Honestly, I'm suprised this thread isn't flooded by people wating for the creed-esque levels of genius here.
    >> Tech Priest Naile 02/04/10(Thu)15:12 No.7922705
    I approve of pansy elf murdering.

    But not their wimmenz. Even if it is hard to tell which are the women until you pull their pants down.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:13 No.7922718
    Anyway, Whispers of the Edifice, for those unfamiliar with it, is a ritual that lets you ask questions of a room or structure about events occurring in or near it. The room knows whatever happened in it, at face value, but cannot make analysis or judgements about it.

    As for the dungeon, our DM had some of the Elves ask us to help them with a Wretch Dragon that had ensconced itself in an ancient Elvish barrow and animated a number of undead fey, which itself is complete anathema to the Elves. We set out after taking a day to prepare, and I stalled it into two days with the necessity of gathering supplies...and by convincing the Dwarves to talk a number of Elvish guards into getting roaring drunk with me. The DM doesn't seem to realize I am stalling, or that I am doing so because, after thirty days, a corpse cannot be Raised.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:13 No.7922728
    Do elves have adams appels we could check that way.

    Oh way, male elves having ANYING that's not feminine?

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:14 No.7922733
    1) Kill the Men.
    2) Rape/ Seduce The Women
    3)Improve the Bloodline
    4) ???
    5) PROFIT
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:16 No.7922765
    Get the dwarves to spike their drinks with dwarven ale.

    One sip of that, and the elves will be in a coma for a year.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:16 No.7922767
    inb4 Elves used Gentle Repose, hurrdurr
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:17 No.7922789
    Yes, there's now 2-3 people in the thread (Not including OP)
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:17 No.7922790
    Dude, hold on, before you keep posting, read http://pastebin.com/f29c51184

    Someone claiming to be your DM came on here asking about you, and a tripfag named Exalted was trying to spoil things for you by giving away your plots. Now, she also tried to give the DM ideas, and while the thread was never archived, a suptger managed to trick Exalted into posting her AIM and having a conversation with here. It's not ALL relevant, but it's pretty lulzy.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:19 No.7922818
    I remember that thread, Exhalted was being a white-knighting asshole.

    seriously, fuck you exhalted.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:21 No.7922838

    They didn't. They really don't approve of doing anything with corpses besides burying them. Gentle Repose, like Raise Dead, interferes with the natural process of life.

    Incidentally, the DM tried to convince me that, in fact, peacefully trading with the Elves would benefit the Human Kingdom more. I realized, however, that with the superiority complex her Elves possess, they would undoubtedly never concede to being our vassals or allies, but would condescend to give us artisan-goods we don't really need. Besides, at this point, I think their most valuable commodity is lumber, and they would never sell that.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:26 No.7922889
    ...She's actually starting to negotiate with you instead of trying to get you exposed. Either you have her beat or she has something up her sleeve.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:26 No.7922895
    By the way, if your whole scheme goes to pot, try and burn down as much of the forest as you can.

    Humans are Petty and Spiteful, play it up!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:32 No.7922958
    On the other hand, a raging inferno burning down their precious trees could make the perfect cover for an escape : /
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:34 No.7922976
    Or you could find a way to poison/contaminate the water supply, that would save the trees for harvesting
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:35 No.7922994
    Now, at the last minute, she threw in a tidbit in one of the rooms near the end, on a yellowing fragment of parchment, that told us something about the Eye of Blight. Apparently, in ancient times, it was a weapon of execution...back when Humans and Elves lived together as one shiny sparkledust peaceful society. Essentially, a magic-implement version of an executioner's axe. It represented the forces of decay in the natural cycle, and could instantly rot a person away to dust. I think, she wasn't very clear. What she WAS clear about was that it was powerful, an Artifact, and had BECOME an Artifact because it was corrupted by killing so many people. I'm convinced the whole "superpowered execution weapon" thing is something she stole from Bleach.

    Incidentally, due to the Weeaboo refusing to do his job as a Defender and trying to get me killed repeatedly during the fighting, the Dwarves have become my unofficial bodyguards.

    ...which roughly translates to "they drink my expensive wine, eat my expensive foods, and attempt to convince me that a beard will make me a better spellcaster." Something about facial hair forming a natural magic array, or something.

    Weeaboo got a new sword, a Spellblade Bastard Sword of some sort, a curved, katana-like weapon with elvish runes written on the blade, a handle made of natural wood, that belonged to an ancient Elvish hero. He's been threatening, OOC, to live up to its reputation by quenching it in my blood.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:36 No.7923007
    Oh if you do commit genocide by water posioning be sure to say "Nothing can beat the music of hundreds of voices screaming in unison." while cackling maniacly for roleplaying xp!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:36 No.7923013

    Exalted is a dyke, White Knighting for pussy. She also brags about her e-girlfriend. I think we've proved female neckbeards are as bad as male ones.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:39 No.7923031
    Why do you feel the need to carry this affair this far?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:39 No.7923036
    >convince me that a beard will make me a better spellcaster.

    Are you sure it won't? Mastermind Mages with dorf bears are pretty friggin sweet.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:40 No.7923050

    I lol'd
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:40 No.7923066
    Speak of the devil.

    Seriously, fuck you exhalted. Fuck you.
    >> Tech Priest Naile 02/04/10(Thu)15:41 No.7923068
    All proper wizards have lengthy beards. Those dwarves know what's right and proper.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:41 No.7923076

    Because asking a human being patriotic and talented enough to rise as far as my character has to betray everything, every principle of his kingdom, every trust placed in him, to harm his homeland for the sake of whiny, superiorist savages is ridiculous.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:42 No.7923081
    Of course.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:42 No.7923082
    >Mastermind Mages with

    > are pretty friggin sweet.

    >dorf bears

    Oh fuck me running with a chainsaw...
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:42 No.7923090

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:43 No.7923098
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    Hold on now, Exalted.

    Just back the fuck away, and nobody has to get hurt. You leave us alone with our elf murdering, and we'll leave YOU the fuck alone.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:44 No.7923104

    It wasn't so much negotiation, per se, as trying to steal a motivation away. If she declares that killing all the Elves causes the forest to rot away, or something, I can ready a speech saying that we've won something more precious by awakening the spirits of our people to war and conquest, and urging our armies to seize the very horizons, and beyond. All the way to the Astral Sea, if need be.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:45 No.7923117
    Then speak with your DM about the issue out-of-game, preferably. It sounds, on balance, as though she's new and inexperienced, and that she's doing the best she can and really being quite saintly to not railroad you further. What should have happened was you two working out your characters and plot ahead of time so that things like this wouldn't happen, but evidently, she didn't know about it.
    You're clever, but I also feel as though you're being dickish.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:45 No.7923125
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    Finally, another person who appreciates subtly when it comes to exterminating the xeno/heritics.

    I applaud you, sir.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:46 No.7923139
    > and attempt to convince me that a beard will make me a better spellcaster."

    Well most wizards do have beards...

    >Something about facial hair forming a natural magic array, or something.

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:48 No.7923155
    Oh he is totally being a dick about it, he said so himself. But the key point is he appears to be roleplaying it quite well so that it fits the character and is actually being very clever about it.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:48 No.7923163
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    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:48 No.7923165
    Hurting people cleverly is no better than hurting people crudely.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)15:48 No.7923166
    The Eye of Blight, incidentally, remains safely buried. Every so often, the DM tosses a surreal dream at me where it promises me everything it thinks I want, but...so far, I'm not falling for it. It doesn't help her case that she seems to think I want to be Doctor Doom, or a Lich.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:49 No.7923168
    Are you kidding, the DM wouldn't be able to hear him over the weaboo fapping with both hands to the yaoi mary sue elves.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:50 No.7923176
    *GAAAASP* Holy yes god shit! It's that time agains!

    Also, op, if you can, tell us more about the rumbling brothers. Some of their actions and adventures and such. I love them.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:50 No.7923178

    Are Elves people?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:50 No.7923183
    Except it's not really pro-humanity, his allies are dwarves and a half-orc it's really just that he hates the Fey's (Elves and Eladrin) hippie bullshit. If their culture was more brutal with it's own cruel parts and intended to have flaws, he'd probably not be doing all this.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:50 No.7923185
    Still better than 1/6th of the players being a lolchaotic murding fucktard.

    I'd give the OP exp and rewards for creativity and style.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:51 No.7923190
    The DM overdid her elves out of inexperience. This kind of thing could have been resolved in a much better way.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:51 No.7923193
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    I'm not sure what to think about this. After that fake GM thing it seems like this is a huge troll. But, such an elaborate troll would require way too much effort.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:51 No.7923200
    We long ago ruled that Elves are not people.

    See: It's not raped if it's an elf.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:51 No.7923203
    Being a lolchaotic murdering fucktard generally doesn't do anything more than annoy people. The OP has set out specifically to ruin his DM's world apparently for the lulz.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:52 No.7923210
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    That's great. No one cares about your opinions. Now go away
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:52 No.7923213
    ...Pretty sure you've got to get rid of the orb. It's sentient and, if it has access to your thoughts, it could potentially blackmail you into taking it.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:53 No.7923222
    I will not.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:53 No.7923225
    He's changing his DM's world, not ruining it, and he's doing it for reasons described in
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:53 No.7923228
    The whole point is that this entire affair has escalated beyond reason.

    Which is why it's so god damn funny despite the fact that he's ruining her game.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:53 No.7923237
    I beg to differ. The latter has style. A well-crafted weapon used to kill a man can be admired for it's craftsmanship and efficiency in it's job without condoning the murder.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:54 No.7923245
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    What part of "Using brilliant strategy to murder xenos" don't you understand.

    Don't make me outflank your colon with a baneblade.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:55 No.7923249

    OP, just disregard Exalted. Its not contributing anything to the thread anyway, so just go ahead and post your narrative/ignore its taunting.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:55 No.7923251
    Then admire the weapon while attempting to keep the murderer from completing more murders.

    Ruining it for her. It's rather obvious from his description of earlier events that he's aiming for this while simultaneously enjoying it via roleplaying.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:55 No.7923263
    You say that like it's a bad thing.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:55 No.7923264
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    Oh well, another tripfag added to the filter, I guess
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:56 No.7923265
    I concur. OP, do you have AIM yourself? Perhaps we can resolve this less publicly.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:56 No.7923266

    Because fuck you.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:56 No.7923271
    It's still better, I was pointing out there is a difference. And let's be frank, the person being murdered does kind of deserve it. Sure, there are probably better way but the person being murdered is no real loss.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:57 No.7923280

    Sure, the DM overdid her Elves, but she's also been mature enough to roll with the OP's punches and work around it. She hasn't kicked the OP out of the game, she hasn't introduced some Deus Ex Machina to come down and reveal the OP's crimes. She's clearly happy to roll with this, and she doesn't need protection from the big bad player who, so far, has played a dick really well, and with good reason.

    Fuck off Exalted.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:57 No.7923283
    Yeah and by his account her setting was ruining it for him.

    Seriously if you want a story where everything goes your way, go write fanfiction.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:58 No.7923290
    Now your just being huge pretentious elitist fucktard, who thinks you're better then everyone else, therefore you think you have the right and keen judgment to fix other people's problems and only you.

    Kindly GTFO
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)15:58 No.7923291
    It's still resulting in unnecessary pain; moreover, it's being laughed about over here.
    It's true that I can't do anything about it specifically but try to convince the OP to relent, but I'll continue to do that unless someone convinces me otherwise.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)15:58 No.7923297
    Don't fall for it OP. Just ignore. And Moar! Moar stories! I crave the delicious stories!
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)15:59 No.7923303
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    >>calling someone an elitist fucktard who thinks theyre better than everyone else
    >>play a game based entirely on racism.
    No shes right, you guys are pretty retarded
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:00 No.7923312
    Exalted, why don't you get mad at the party's Defender blatantly ignoring his role within the party? At least the OP is playing his character well within reason, given the background of his character; Weaboo is dragging OOC drama into the game.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:00 No.7923317
    MOAR Rumblin' bro's. I want to see a drawfag of them fistbumping... no, head smashing in dorfen glory!
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:01 No.7923328
    For the same reason you're not mad at the OP; it has in-character justification.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:01 No.7923331
    Here's a fucking hint.


    The players LIKE the change in the setting, Most people don't want to hear the DM wax lyrical about her fantasies.

    This "omg the dm's not having a perfect time, let's bore 80% of the players so the DM can self-indulge" bullshit is annoying.
    >> Tech Priest Naile 02/04/10(Thu)16:01 No.7923335
    >Says the person namefagging "littlegirl"

    No, really. We're just trying to enjoy OP's story here. You and Exalted could choose to ignore the thread and pretend it doesn't exist but you insist on coming in and making pretentious faggots out of yourselves. Why don't you just shut the hell up and go away?

    OP, please continue and ignore the trolls.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:01 No.7923337
    >It's still resulting in unnecessary pain; moreover, it's being laughed about over here.
    Oh boo hoo. It's not too bad, the DM's not going to be seriously hurt in any way, at worse she feels kind of sad. And people being hurt in certain styles IS funny. Human nature to laugh at it, from the man slipping on a banana peel to this.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:02 No.7923343
    >implying racism has anything to do with elitism
    lolololololololol valid argument there
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:02 No.7923350

    Holly crap, I made that picture, and I just now, saw it on the 4chan main page where they display those pics.

    EPIC WIN !!
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:02 No.7923353
    Clearly you didn't read the leaked logs, else you would have seen that my plan here is to find a compromise so that everyone can have some fun.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:04 No.7923364
    I read your fucking compromise.

    It amounted to you telling the DM to lie to the players to cover up DM fiat.

    I reiterate, fuck you.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:04 No.7923367
    Just ignore !OOir, it's just a troll. Anyways, continue please OP.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:04 No.7923371
    ...No he doesn't. The defender isn't that smart, there is literally no way he could even suspect the Illusionist of anything, as the Illusionist hasn't even revealed he hates elves. His alibi is airtight and no one in character has any idea what he's doing. And yet all of a sudden the Defender feels suspicious and hostile towards the illusionist and isn't, y'know, defending him in combat. That is bullshit and you know it.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:04 No.7923375
    There'd still be a major human-elf war going on, which is what the OP would have wanted. He doesn't get railroaded into helping the elves, the elves survive, everyone is happy.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:05 No.7923383
    Clearly you didn't read the logs, else you would have known that the Weaboo didn't have any in character reason's to suspect the OP. Even though no one else (except the Orc) knows what the OP has done, the Weaboo is playing his character with the OOC knowledge that OP did it, and without any other further proof.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:05 No.7923387

    And who said you have the right as an outsider to interfere with the game? The fact is you're just being a whiteknighting cunt.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:05 No.7923388
    >in-character justification
    >OP has masterfully set up the entire fucking thing so that Weaboo DOESN'T KNOW A GODDAMNED THING, unless he brings up OOC shit

    Your troll is showing. Now filtering you.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:06 No.7923400

    The Rumbling Brothers tell stories about themselves a lot, that tend to change with each telling. The Fighter brother has told a few grimdark stories in-character about wars against the Drow, while the Bard brother will frequently make up bits of dwarven history and culture. Beards, he says, are incredibly important, because they show one's family and history among a race that normally looks very much alike. A black bead on the marriage-braid near the left sideburn, for instance, indicates a widower. The style of the beard, forking, etc. indicates clan and family, as I said earlier. Dwarves joining the military are all ritually shaved, their beards styled in a specific fashion, with specific lengths allowed depending on rank. A decorated and heroic general's beard might almost appear to be armored with beads and signs of rank. Only priests are allowed to be barbers, in general, although parents and elders may tend the beards of their children. Part of the reason Dwarven culture is so traditional and honest is because one can literally see, essentially, one's birth, resume, and family in one's face. Having one's beard and head fully shaven is the mark of a criminal, one that has been cut off from their family. A criminal bad enough to be exiled has his cheeks and jaw scarred so that he can never grow a beard again.

    In the first age of the world, only male dwarves could grow beards, and it was due to the quest of a single, exceptionally brave and doughty Dwarf-woman that Moradin gave beards to female Dwarves. Although their beards would always be shorter and lighter, their heads would be less prone to baldness than their husbands, and so they could show their family and honor in their shorter beards and their braids.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:06 No.7923405

    What the fuck? No it doesn't. There is literally no in-character reason Weeaboo has to suspect OP's character has anything to do with the murders. He's metagaming, plain and simple
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:06 No.7923408
    How can I possibly interfere? I can't touch the lives of anyone involved in this game or alter their opinions in any way unless they choose it.

    Oh, what a pity. I find that my sympathy is lower, though, for those who start OOC drama in the first place.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:06 No.7923409
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    Playing a table-top game does not cause pain you imbecile. If having your campaign derailed is distressing to you, you need to SACK UP.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:07 No.7923419

    Lumberjack Commando's
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:07 No.7923424
    Awesome. Sounds like you have a pretty good party going. How is the Orc rapist doing? Any updates there?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:08 No.7923427
    Oh yeah, a compromise is, I cheat to kill your character, and ruin all his hard work planning.

    Sounds like a fair deal, that.

    By the way have you considered investing your money in Nigerian Royalty?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:08 No.7923430

    Wasn't your compromise "Kick elfslayer, do the DM's Avatarquest?"
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:08 No.7923438
    That's a cool idea. I shall have to steal it.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:09 No.7923443
    >Having one's beard and head fully shaven is the mark of a criminal, one that has been cut off from their family. A criminal bad enough to be exiled has his cheeks and jaw scarred so that he can never grow a beard again.

    I'm stealing this. All of this.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:09 No.7923444
    Since when did I mention killing his character? I advocated giving his character a fair chance to escape.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:09 No.7923449
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    Awesome =D
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)16:11 No.7923473
    I normaly do, but I just felt like dropping in when I saw that loltastic post, its like the empire from 40k BAWWWING about tau being 'elitist', seriously.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:11 No.7923475

    Well, you did go behind my DM's back to try and have me punished for roleplaying. I'm going to say "no".
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:11 No.7923477

    My DM thought it would be cute to have my Dwarf's beard be destroyed, and freaked when he tried to kill himself afterwards out of shame. My justification was along the Rumbling Brothers line that only criminals have shaved beards, and since the DM also made it so the beard can't grow back, he would never be able to return home, or anywhere near Dwarven Civilization.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:11 No.7923481

    You're not the UN of roleplaying Exalted. Fuck off.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:13 No.7923494
    Go behind your DM's back? I think not.
    And I'm not attempting to punish you for roleplaying, only trying to get the setting on a keel in which everyone can have fun. You don't get railroaded into helping the elves, the elves get to survive a bit longer, everyone can be happy.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:13 No.7923497

    She did try to.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:13 No.7923499
    Yeah he's closer to the Weimar Republic.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:13 No.7923505
    Your deem did WHAT


    What were they thinking? How did this happen? Whyyyyy?
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:13 No.7923509

    Go behind my back to my DM, I mean. Typo.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:14 No.7923515
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    Rock on Elf Slayer.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:14 No.7923519
    Never caught these threads before. Where are these leaked logs?
    >> SON OF MR. RAGE 02/04/10(Thu)16:14 No.7923524



    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:14 No.7923525
    Ditto. Especially the legend about the female dorf's quest tht granted beardness. Double stealing that.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:15 No.7923529
    I had no idea how to reach you, and your DM was (not really) the one posting. How can I have gone behind your back if your back wasn't there for me to go behind?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:15 No.7923532

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:16 No.7923538
    I actually like that the weeaboo is there. I don't like him especially, but I like it in that it makes the story more exciting and enjoyable. It adds another layer of danger, even a small one since op so easily outwits him.
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)16:16 No.7923541
    >>post that made absolutely no sense
    I know i shouldn't be surprised considering how racist this thread and /tg/ is in general. but it sure keeps giving out the gold. keep em coming, I could use a good laugh along with the sickening sensation that the world will end in 10 years and you'll all be responsible.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:16 No.7923552
    Anyway, the Wretch Dragon was, I was afraid, part of a Human effort to saborate the Elvish homeland and that, if we killed it, we would be guilty of treason. Fortunately, I speak Draconic, and talked with it. It was actually simply trying to eat and harm the Elves, and...I think...looking for the Eye of Blight. If it was lying, I have plausible deniability for letting our Artificer finish it off after we hacked it to pieces
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:17 No.7923554
    they were in the thread that didn't get archived, by the (supposed) OP's DM.

    Bascially Exhalted's compromise was have the artifact of doom infect him when he moved it with a shovel or somthing (Because magic works like electricity, now) and bascially have the DM lie her ass off to take out the OP.

    In return the OP would get... well nothing really.

    Like I said before, the "compromise" was bullshit.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:17 No.7923556
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:17 No.7923562
    It would just be nice though if he had an actual IC reason for doing what he did. Then I'd wholeheartedly agree with you.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:17 No.7923563
    Look, as it is now, he hasn't done anything except maintain the status quo. The prince won't return to make piece, and since the Prince should be dead and homosexuality is frowned upon, he'll do his best to hide this entire sordid affair from his leaders. He's not done scheming, and it is possible for him to slip up eventually.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:18 No.7923570
    The guy's working with many non-humans for his objective.

    Shut up.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:18 No.7923574

    Not to be bitchy, but in the first thread, you asked for my DM's information to "resolve the situation". I read the logs, you know, please do not act as if I'm stupid enough to fall for your martyred mediator act.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:18 No.7923587
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    Guys, please stop replying to the tripfag. You can't reason with trolls, just ignore them

    OP, please carry on with your awesome story. Everyone else, please just add !OOirDpvrkA to your tripfag filter and be done with it already
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:19 No.7923588

    Basically he decided that whenever somebody makes a reference to something, in or out of character, or makes a joke, it accumulates Paradox damage as if we were playing Mage. Only thing is, how much one reference accumulates compared to another is completely arbitrary. So when he decided I had too much, my Dwarf was visited by Moradin in his sleep, and had his beard punched off.

    It's fucking retarded, and basically there for him to just lord over our characters more, since he sucks at battle strategy and can't flat-out kill them even with zerg rush.
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)16:19 No.7923589
    so? how is teaming up with blacks to genocide asians not racist?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:19 No.7923591
    Intent, cunt. Seriously, stop being such a little bitch and let the DM handle it. If it was a problem, I'm sure it would have come up by now. You have no indication the DM even cares, in fact, you have indications of the opposite, since the DM doesn't in fact pull a DM fiat or some shit like that.

    Stop discouraging roleplaying and go back to your suptg circlejerk.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:19 No.7923597
    No, Exalted really is the UN of Gaming. Talks a lot of shit, is vaguely annoying, and tries to be heard over the general hubbub of world politics, but everybody just says lolno, pats it on the head, and keeps on trucking.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:20 No.7923618
    Ah, that.
    Don't worry, I'm not martyred. But as you're a dick both in and out of play, I suppose there isn't really much I can do after all.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:20 No.7923619
    because black and asians are real.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:21 No.7923625
    I'd say his actions are more xenophobic than racist, since he he might get along with elves if they weren't whiny sunshine hippies.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:21 No.7923635
    Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:21 No.7923636
    I dunno. I don't believe in asians. I think it's all just a gov'ment conspiricy! I mean, have you ever been to asia?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:22 No.7923644
    Sounds more like the LoN to me, bro.

    At least people PRETEND to care about the UN.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:22 No.7923650
    OP you are a devious bastard. Rock on, you're doing a fine thing.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:23 No.7923659
    Good, now fuck off and let OP do his stuff.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:23 No.7923662
    Man these stories are awesome. Keep up the good work op. You remind me of wasteland wanderer in the fact you both have some awesome tales to tell about your games.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:23 No.7923666
    Next you're gonna tell me you don't believe in faeries.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 02/04/10(Thu)16:24 No.7923672
    Haven't I had far too many people yelling at me for the observation that no one cares about me to actually fly?

    Ah well. I may have been hasty and acting under poor assumptions. If the DM has in fact gotten over this, my attentions aren't really necessary, so... I'll withdraw for now.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:24 No.7923676
    No, I've been to California. No shortage of fairies.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:26 No.7923693
    This is /tg/, we need to care about what you say to respond.

    We're so easy to troll, we'll troll ourselves to to allieve bordom.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:26 No.7923695

    No she didn't. She had the Elves respond as they would, as in, try to find out what happened within the bounds of their culture, but the OP outsmarted them.

    If she had brought in DM Fiat, the OP couldn't have outsmarted her.
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)16:26 No.7923699
    what does that have to do with anything we're talking about a game here, unless youre refering to your own bullshit racism in real life, and thats made obvious by all your fuck year humans are the best faggotry. which has all the impericle support and cognitive thought of 'white people are the best'

    The point here is youre all fucking racist bints who are ironical calling someone else an elitist. this isnt about your racism, thats stupid to debate because anyone who belives that shit wouldnt listen to reason anyway.
    >> Firstquest 02/04/10(Thu)16:27 No.7923705
    If they are still playing and, if I remember correctly this has been ongoing for a month or more? Then obviously people are having fun. I don't personally give a shit about elves, or dwarfs, or humans, or whatever.

    But as far as I can tell this guy is bringing an interesting character to the game, the DM is rolling with it even if it wasn't her original intention, and it is highly likely that his curve ball has made the game more interesting for all parties involved, including the DM.

    So if someone ends up ruining the fun. Well, shame on you.

    Also, The DM does not sound like a bad person, as she has not handwaved a reason for his character to die, and he has actually managed to accomplish some things.

    I'm not rooting for the guy because he is a human, or I think elves are annoying, or because OMG LOL DWARFS AND HUUUMANS ARE BEST FAG ELVES LOL.

    Just because he seems to be RPing, and his character is well thought out. I don't care what fucking race they are from, if they have that, I give brofist.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)16:28 No.7923720

    The logs were reposted, or a link to them, up above, actually. Just mentioning that.

    Now I'm thinking about my next goals. First, I need to destroy any potential evidence...although I am, unless I am very wrong, safe. Then, I believe we are being rewarded for our dragonslaying, although Wretch Dragons are truly pathetic creatures, even one elevated to Solo status with the Death Master template. Which technically can only be applied to Humanoids, but...that's a silly and arbitrary restriction. We might get a chance to meet the Elvish royalty, in which case...

    ...Do you think I should kidnap the Elvish princess, /tg/?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:29 No.7923729

    Holy shit, you're turning into Ganondorf!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:29 No.7923736

    Seriously. OP could be a Deva, the Dwarf Brothers Goliaths, and the weaboo a gnome and it would still be interesting.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:31 No.7923753
    ...If you do, I don't think you can maintian your cover and will likely need assistance which makes hiding your misdeeds more difficult and inter-party fighting is likley. I'd advise agains it.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:31 No.7923759

    Watch, I'll even troll myself.

    FF7 is the best in the series.

    You're retarded, FF7 caused everyone to turn in go graphic whores and bishi fanbois. FF6 is FAR superior.

    Dude, take off the nostalga glasses, ff10 is clearly the best.

    You've got to be fuckking kidding me, water polo beats out the best storyline and best characters? also your sequel sucked. FF6 is clearly best.

    Sephiroth is cooler than kefka

    Sephiroth is a faggy momma's boy.

    FF8 is the best, no monsters dropping gold, and it was WAY cooler.

    Lol shitty gunblade, shitty magic, and everyone's emo, lolno. Also the story was retarded.

    I like FF9

    (Everyone Else)


    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:31 No.7923760
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    I like where this is going, OP.

    I wish more of my RPs had players as creative as you in them.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:33 No.7923784
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    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:34 No.7923793
    No. She'd likely have all kinds of magical protection and gear on her, and the manhunt (elfhunt?) that would start for her would make it impossible for you to hide. If you kidnapped her, you'd really only have the choice of returning to your kingdom to hold her hostage, or kill her to further destabilize the elven situation.

    Of course, the DM could easily use this as bait for you. The princesses' quarters probably have all kinds of abjuration and divination protection about them, and if you tried anything the guards would know instantly. Your house of cards would come falling down.

    Instead: Learn about her. When you meet her, praise her for her good traits (intelligence, fairness, beauty, etc.) then offer her a gift worthy of royalty.

    That damned evil orb. Hopefully it'll corrupt the shit out of her and she'll cause a huge incident inside the palace.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:34 No.7923794

    Is that from Zeorymer?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:37 No.7923832

    Players have a right to not be railroaded, and from what OP's said, she's TRIED.

    By the way, can anyone archive this and/or set up a 1d4chan page for Elfslayer?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:37 No.7923834
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    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:38 No.7923845
    But she might recognize the eye. Risky. Honestly, I don't see why we should give any advice, he's better than the best of us at this.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:38 No.7923846
    Kidnap her and subject her to human dickings until she catches a case of severe penis poisoning (aka pregnant). But only if you can get away with it and keep your plausible deniability.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:38 No.7923848

    If by "kidnap" you mean "bargain with the Elf King to marry her off to your nobility as an offering of peace, then lolbackstab and have her be given to some no-name noble", sure.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:38 No.7923852
    Don't do it.

    One of the Biggest reasons your plan succeeded (for now anyways) was that you had the advantage of suprise (Over the DM, and the elves) and while none of the elves will suspect you, the murder might make the elves more alert.

    Also do you trust the DM to not let OOC knowledge influence any future encounter with the elves.

    Expect heavy protections and such against any crimes.

    Just stay low and pretend to be all buddy-buddy with the elves.

    THEN poision the water ala kefka and run away!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:38 No.7923854
    Er, I'm not so sure. Seems to me that'd give the elves an excuse to go and attack the humans. Now granted, if you can properly conceal the cause from your own kingdom, an apparently unprovoked assault on human lands by the elves would be a great justification for one hell of a war. But if it ever got back to the king and his court, they'd probably squash you like a bug. And I can just see weeaboo tiefling tattling to daddy that you started the fight.

    In fact, now that I think about it, tricking weeaboo tiefling into lighting the spark, then killing him and pinning it on the elves might do the trick. Gets rid of him, starts a little ruckuss, and did I mention it gets rid of him?
    >> Sauber !f1v85QnTcU 02/04/10(Thu)16:39 No.7923863
    OP, use your INTENSE Illusion mayjicks to make the orb look like some long-lost elven artifact plundered by humans long ago.
    Seriously just ask the royal family about shit like that and ask for a really good description when they bring something up like you're suprised or MIGHT HAVE IT WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:40 No.7923866
    Oh wow. I like this.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:41 No.7923883
    Humans and elves are already at war.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:42 No.7923898
    Ach, my bad. Clearly I need to re-read these threads.

    Disregard, cocks, etc.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:43 No.7923911
    oooh... that's actually not too bad. Very risky and suspicious though. Try to marry her yourself! Then betray her of course.

    Also, any update on your Orc-y rape buddy? How is she doing?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:43 No.7923916
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:44 No.7923919
    Humans are generally better off at war than the elves too. They are winning, mixed with the mary sue elves not wanting to fight back.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:46 No.7923950

    This is probably right. No way the DM's gonna let you get away with a capture, which I'd say would be far harder anyway.

    Instead, what you should propose is that the Elves send a delegation, accompanied by you, back to the Human Kingdoms to make the case for peace. The humans are, after all, the aggressors, and it is them who need persuading of the wrongness of their cause.

    Hopefully the DM will send someone properly important, seeing as how these negotiations affect the future of the entire elven race. When you get back to your kingdom, have the Elves you brought with you put on trial for the murder of your Prince. Or just summarily executed, if the Elves feel that they can murder human nobility with impunity, then Humans should not be otherwise restricted.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:48 No.7923964

    Humans are awesome. Dickish nationalism when OP admitted in thread 1 that, if he fucks up, he's dead and okay with that, is awesome. He may not be Good, but he's a hero.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:49 No.7923972
    Wouldn't that make him Lawful Neutral? Kind of like James Bond
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:50 No.7923981

    Holy fucking shit, I'm like 1/3 this thread ;_;
    >> littlegirl 02/04/10(Thu)16:50 No.7923983
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    yep that about sums up /tg/
    stupid, racist but most of all
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:52 No.7924002
    I love you op. I'd love to have your human babies.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:52 No.7924005
    James Bond you say?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:52 No.7924007
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    Argh, how can you say such things and at the same time post an image of Plug?

    Combined terrible/awesome is hurting my brain.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:54 No.7924032
    OP, what about the half-orc who raped you?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:54 No.7924033
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    I prefer to think of him as Cancer Man.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:56 No.7924055
    Oh yes. Tell us more about your deliciously traitorous relationship of sex and treachery.

    It really is like James Bond.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:57 No.7924062
    Goddammit, I'm dissapointed here.
    Why would people care what the trolls post, anyway - just get on with the story so we can see what happens, dammit!
    OP, I hope you manage to post this somewhere - maye make a word file and put it up for download?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:57 No.7924064
    OP, Do you have high ranks in Craft Alchemy or Knowledge: Chemistry? If so you might be able to craft some form of Chlorine gas (with proper caution, of course) and use your illusionary skills to gas the elven royal court!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)16:59 No.7924075
    Gas them like Jews.

    Nice, anon, nice.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:00 No.7924086
    You could use an Illusion to disguise your familliar as the weaboo, then have the familliar use the mustard gas on the royalty, then have him jump out a window or something.

    Then frame the weaboo for assassinating the guard.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:00 No.7924092
    oh god. yes. Oh god.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:01 No.7924097
    OP, and everyone else, please don't fucking respond to the trolls here.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:01 No.7924100
    Actually I was inspired by the WWI germans using Mustard gas.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:04 No.7924135
    We know how effective the gas was on the allies in the trenches, and I SINCERLY doubt the elves know to breathe through a urine soaked rag, so it seems like a good way to get them. (the royal chambers is indoors right? If so, it'd be doubly effective.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:06 No.7924157
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    WW1 was so horrible. Such a horrible war.

    What a delicious, succulent idea.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:06 No.7924158
    Is there any way the party could divert a river a flood the elvish capital? Seemed to work pretty well for the mongols.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:06 No.7924159

    That is just brutal man. Have you seen pictures of what that shit does to you?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:07 No.7924164

    Problem is, assembling enough Chlorine gas to kill off a chamber full of people is gonna take time, as well as being not exactly subtle.

    At this point, I think the OP should count himself as having won and keep a low profile, if not get the hell out of Dodge. The war will continue, the humans have their war-martyr in the form of the murdered prince, and the OP has made his point. Any more hugely elaborate schemes only invite failure and death.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:09 No.7924182
    Hence the whole "Frame the weaboo" bit.

    As it stands he's still a thorn in the OP's side.

    Also, isn't he a mage, I thought magic would help him overcome the production hurdles.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:10 No.7924195
    Please, for the love of god, stop talking about ww1, it isn't really relevant for this thread right now.
    Maybe whe OPis done with what he wants to post...
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:10 No.7924196
    Or he could strap wicks onto the tails of various small animals, and herd them into the elven towns, after lighting them.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:11 No.7924200
    Illusionist really. I don't know if an illusion of awful gas works so well on killing people. He needs more along the idea of bottled controlled release cloudkill action.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:13 No.7924217
    Fuck, Illusionists can only cast Illusions? I thought they just specialized in them.

    Ok, how about killing the weaboo and framing it on the elves, then using the death of one of their comrades as an excuse to flee from the elvin assassins.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:13 No.7924220
    The issue with all these ideas is hat the DM is against him to some degree. It is thus difficult to do any damage on a city scale without her being tricksy.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:14 No.7924231

    As soon as they're out of the elf-lands, the OP's problems disappear. The Weeaboo can go to the King and tell him that the OP was guilty all he likes. I doubt the King will believe him.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:14 No.7924233
    Haha, good point. I'm stupid, I forgot how things in this game work. Illusionists can magic it up with the best of them!

    Tl:DR: Disregard me, I suck cocks.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:15 No.7924249
    Yeah, I thought illusionsts could still cast non-illusion spells (at a penalty or something)

    How about drugging the weaboo, while having the familliar rape the elvish princess while disguised as the weaboo?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:15 No.7924250
    Weeaboo is the tierfling anyways, and I believe they are hate to a degree (not like the elves, but more just general prejudice). Thus he is in a weakened position in the courts anyways. Hurrah!
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:17 No.7924273
    Ok can or can't illusionists cast non-illusion spells.

    I've never played 4e so I don't know what kind of bullshit changes the spellplague did.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:17 No.7924277
    Don't forget that OP has stated that he has real versions of all of his illusion spells.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:18 No.7924287
    Why are you still there?

    I thought you only had to be there to find out about the Prince, which you've already done and framed the royal guard.

    So why don't you just go back, report the murder to Humanland, and start the genocide?

    It's been a while, so I'm sure I've forgotten the reason.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:19 No.7924313
    How. Holy crap he's awesome. He really is like a secret agent and mastermind.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:21 No.7924336
    Perhaps the elves won't let him go with an ongoing investigation about what's been going on? Just speculation of course.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:22 No.7924344
    Ok, drug/dominate/whatever the weaboo, hide/move him out of town. Make an illusion of him, have illusion poision water supply/burn down forest and/or rape the princess.

    Have the illusion confess/boast over how much he hates elves, and that the illusionist was onto him, so he tried to frame him in order to get away.

    Have him confess He's an agent for the drow and then have him run away.

    Wake weaboo up.

    Have OP swear to hunt him down for "all the trouble he's caused"
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)17:23 No.7924354

    I think I have Weeaboo already. He can honestly say he didn't break the Magic Circles and free the Guard, but...we've already shown it can be beaten. He's already under suspicion for his actions, I just need to let him keep doing what he has been doing.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:24 No.7924361
    But then the weeaboo can honestly claim bullshit in character. Sure the op might be able to get around it, but still. It's a possibly unneeded risk. Although the Op managed to murder the guard and get away with it making it look easy and stylish, so What couldn't he pull off?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:25 No.7924371
    Oh, Op is still here. Awesome. So no orc lover update I assume?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:25 No.7924376
    Is there any way to make him black out/amnesia him? Then he doesn't know if he did it or not in character, but he doesn't remember.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:26 No.7924381
    A gentle hand will rule the land. It takes a light touch, like a safecracker or a pickpocket. If you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)17:30 No.7924441

    She's a whirling blur of death, like always. We're still not sure where the relationship is, in-character.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:31 No.7924448
    Ok, rather than have him boast about it (My reasoning being if he's such a sterotypical BBEG in D&D he HAS to be the villian) have the elves find some missives forged in he name or something to the drow/humans/whatevers for killing/posioning/burning/raping/whatever.

    Provoke the Weaboo to attack the OP, kill him in self-defence.

    If anyone questiones OP about the missives, tell them (In all honesty) that he doesn't monitor the weaboo's corrispondence, and it wouldn't be hard for him to send mail without him knowing.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:35 No.7924522
    Oh yeah, polymorph the familliar, and have HIM forge the missives, if anyone asks you can respond "I did not forge that letter"
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:36 No.7924537
    Familiars are so wonderful, aren't they?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:39 No.7924585

    Familiar is a female Book Imp I believe.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:40 No.7924595
    Asexual though... Hmmm
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:40 No.7924596
    Also can you spread mummy-rot around like small pox? If so, polymorph the familliar into the weaboo, and frame that on him with some generous "gifts"
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:41 No.7924617
    like anyone gives a shit about their familliar when not using them.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:44 No.7924669
    I have bad news for you OP, given your illusons that have enabled you to commit murders without even falling under suspician, and you seem to have some connection with an orb that can warp nature, I think your DM's trying to turn you into Aizen from Bleach.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:45 No.7924680

    I said the whole thing about being inspired by the whole ww1 trenches because A: It's true. and B: I didn't want to feel like a monster for bringing up the whole holocaust thing.

    Now anon guilted into having me feel worse for being inspired by ww1 trench combat.

    Feel bad, man. ;_;
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:45 No.7924683

    >The DM is Kubo.

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:49 No.7924734
    Hey, I complimented the idea. I said it was deliciously vile. Now if that is a bad thing to you...
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:49 No.7924740
    There's good news though, since he can pretty much fit the weeaboo into Shinji's slot and for extra dickishness actually paraphrase the chapters as he explains the weeaboo's distrust is what allowed OP to manipulate him.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:55 No.7924809

    No such thing in 4e. Alchemy is its own thing now.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:56 No.7924820
    Yeah, but on the other hand, Bleach.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)17:57 No.7924842

    I know enough to know that hugely elaborate schemes JUST for the sake of being hugely elaborate are a weakness. When simply executing someone will suffice, do it.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:57 No.7924846
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)17:58 No.7924852

    I like One Piece more than Bleach, actually.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)17:58 No.7924854
    Damn. OP is genre-savvy. The most dangerous kind of evil mastermind.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:01 No.7924882
    You've trolled the fuck out of Stereotypical elves.
    Pissed off a Yaoi Fangirl
    Cleverly outwitted your game universe's GOD (the DM)
    and you like One Piece.

    OP, we're now best internet friends ever.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:02 No.7924908

    I wouldn't do anything right now.

    The DM is probably waiting for you to do something to the royalty. Unless you have enough time to prepare something, you're going to get caught.

    Just play along until you see an opportunity.

    Also, props to your DM. She's going to make a fine one later on.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:02 No.7924910
    Actually I was thinking of using a magical delivery system to speed it up/keep in anon.

    Problem is I know next-to-nothing about 4e
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:04 No.7924926
    The anime liking thing is actually a minus in my opinion, but that's just because I hate all japanimation.

    The Fight against the DM is GLORIOUS though. Truly an epic in the struggle of man versus GOD.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:06 No.7924952
    That's he funny thing. In his battle with the DM, we actually see the DM improving. It's a good experience for her, and even though she started out with gay elves (literally), she shows great promise.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:06 No.7924956
    I disagree with the idea of bringing the Princess back to your lands, even if it's a Ganondorf style kidnapping; it would give the DM a reason to have her "convince" the Humans of elvish superiority. Seriously, Elves are like Nazis, trying to be better than everyone else. Gotta kill em all. Just get back to Human land and get the warmachine running over all the damn tree huggers
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:06 No.7924960
    So do I.

    >but on the other hand, Bleach
    was supposed to come off as
    >implying that Bleach is awful
    Which it is.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:07 No.7924964
    Indeed, I think you are forcing her to adapt. I suggest 'helping' the weeaboo as well, by using the OOC induced distrust to get him in trouble. Maybe subtly trick him into going on a rampage with his cursed sword?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:09 No.7924995
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    And to think, Elf Slayer threads once interested me. Now its all going downhill faster then most Story Teller system games I've been in.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:10 No.7925015
    I think it's mainly because OP hasn't been posting what he's doing anymore, and he doesn't seem to have any need to scheme.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:11 No.7925028
    lol, you're cool enough OP that I'll let you off for liking One Peace.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:12 No.7925044
    The problem is it is difficult to be all epic all the time without being caught. He is telling this as it is going. If it were afterward, he could give all the good points. This is more of just an update on the situation, and why he wasn't around. You can't say his mission impossible style mastery with killing the guard wasn't amazing. Remember, he can't get more than 20 feet from his familiar without it coming back. I can't believe he didn't hum the theme to mission impossible while he played.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:14 No.7925062
    You know, I'm probably going to get lynched for this, but OP's DM is a pretty good DM some of the time. She hasn't flipped over the table or dropped any rocks; from what I've seen, she's trying to take OP down without breaking the internal logic and mechanics of the game.

    That's why I'm still following this: not because I hate elves or homosexuals or nature, but because it's a mental battle between two capable individuals.

    Also, the Rumble Brothers deserve their own spinoff series.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:14 No.7925065
    Good point... It hadn't occured to me that the DM could pull some Disney shit and have the princess convince the humans. That would be a seriously BAD END.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:16 No.7925093
    Hey, One Piece is the reigning King of Shonen.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:18 No.7925120
    >Hey, One Piece is the reigning Pirate King of Shonen.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:20 No.7925156
    Can you create portals? Could you sneak into a meeting of the highest elf officials under an illusion/disguise?

    Because I think running in as some random elf or an ally or whatever, since I'm not real familiar with all this as I'm only half through reading it.

    But run in, make it seem like the council or whatever is under attack, open a portal, usher all of the council into it. Have it lead right into the hands of waiting human army, or right off the edge of a clifflolidunno
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:21 No.7925167
    Yeah, I think a lot of people agree that she's actually not a bad DM. Her setting makes me want to puke, but she is fair enough not to force some godmodding DM crap down OP's throat, and plays along with his plotting. A lot of DMs I know would just refuse to let him do this.

    Lol, I said that because I don't like shonen, but that's just me.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:26 No.7925222
    I'm kinda agreeing with this guy.
    No matter what happens to the party, the human princeling is dead, the elves have no reason not to think that one of their own killed him, and the war will go on.
    Right now, objectives should be to return to the war effort. If you're going to kidnap anyone on the way out, get a military leader or two, for interrogation.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:27 No.7925251

    >Incidentally, the DM tried to convince me that, in fact, peacefully trading with the Elves would benefit the Human Kingdom more. I realized, however, that with the superiority complex her Elves possess, they would undoubtedly never concede to being our vassals or allies, but would condescend to give us artisan-goods we don't really need. Besides, at this point, I think their most valuable commodity is lumber, and they would never sell that.

    Good lord. They're like the Na'vi from Avatar...
    Nice to see you back by the way
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:29 No.7925274
    The DM's problem is that she has a hard time imagining how anyone would view things from a perspective that's different than hers; I think we all make that mistake sometimes. If OP wasn't being so antagonistic, maybe this game would serve as a learning experience for her.

    That said, I'm enjoying the show.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)18:31 No.7925293

    Illusionist is just a build in 4e, like Staff Wizard. Means you take mostly spells with the Illusion keyword, focus on Intelligence and Charisma, and use the Orb of Deception class feature a lot.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:32 No.7925307
    They look EXACTLY like that. Of course, what I hated about Avatar wasn't the peaceful nature-loving society; it was the heavy-handedness of the message and the cardboard depth of the characters. Quaritch fans are equally annoying as Na'vi fans.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:33 No.7925320
    >Lol, I said that because I don't like shonen, but that's just me.
    One Piece is closer to Classic Disney than shonen. Its a fucking masterpiece.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:34 No.7925328
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    If I may suggest something: Set the Weeaboo up with the elven princess.
    If your DM liked it when the half-orc raped you then she'll LOVE it if those two hook up.

    This serves two purposes.
    1. Playing matchmaker will gobble up ingame time like nobody's business.
    2. If you play your cards right you can kill both of them and make it seem like a suicide pact or some shit like that.

    Also, this is the first time I've posted in one of your threads, OP, and I would just like to say that you're doing a great job.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)18:35 No.7925334

    One nice thing about 4e is that you get two versions of all of your Daily and Utility powers as a Wizard. So, for example, you can have both Sleep and Fireball, but you memorize only one at the start of each day. It's the last callback to Jack Vance's magic system in 4e. I tend to have, and use more publicly, an non-Illusion spell for every Illusion I have, usually violent and flashy spells to keep a reputation as a blunt and direct warmage in my fighting style. Weeaboo DOES know I'm an Illusionist, but he really seems to have just NOT realized he could tell the Elves that, or maybe just realizes that it would be his word against mine, and insufficient evidence to boot.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:36 No.7925349

    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:36 No.7925358
    Has anyone archived this yet?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:38 No.7925378
    I would be careful of setting up the weeaboo with the princess. Any move that puts him into a position to influence the elves is dangerous.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:40 No.7925411
    Yes... setting up the weeaboo with the princess could allow for some diabolical mechanations. And if the princess dies then, the weeaboo could be blamed for that. He could then be put under watch, for possibly killing the prince and framing the guard, then findin a way to off the guard when things weren't going well.

    At very least, hooking up the weeaboo has some nice possibilities. And it would make you look reformed even. Such sweet suffering could be inflicted.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:42 No.7925429
    Whatever you do DON'T hook up with the elvish princess.

    You know what they say about orc girls and jealousy.....
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:42 No.7925437
    True... damn, shit's tough. Especially since I don't know the characters as well.

    Also, I must say I concur that the Rumbling Brothers deserve a spinoff.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:44 No.7925456
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    They get GREEN with envy?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:45 No.7925466
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:46 No.7925475
    It's easier if you remember all elves have tiny penises. Especially the women. I don't know about some people on 4chan, but for me, a definant turnoff.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:48 No.7925490
    Heh, here's one for you.
    Fake having sent a report via Sending, and received a reply ordering you to wreak as much havok on the elven leadership as possible, and return.
    These "orders" are something the Weeaboo will HAVE to follow. If he does not, the entire party will have every reason to take him out for his betrayal.
    Just consider it, he's already shown to sympathize with the enemy.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:51 No.7925525
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    I've just realised - the elves from OP's game are the Overlord elves
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)18:51 No.7925531
    Step 1: Convince Weeaboo and Princess Sparklydyke that they are STAR-CROSSED LOVERS!
    Step 2: Talk to the elvish king about that ne'er-do-well thiefling and his nefarious plans for the princess' virginity.
    Step 3: Kill them and leave a suicide note.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:00 No.7925651
    >Yeah, I think a lot of people agree that she's actually not a bad DM. Her setting makes me want to puke, but she is fair enough not to force some godmodding DM crap down OP's throat, and plays along with his plotting. A lot of DMs I know would just refuse to let him do this.

    Dude, she TRIED to fiat it away. A big part of Elfslayer's tricks have been STOPPING her from fiating via metagame. Hence his encyclopedic knowledge of the rules, I bet he looked it all up just to make sure she couldn't bullshit out of it.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:01 No.7925658
    god damn. I read that log and they just don't get it at all. The Op isn't even evil, he's neutral if anything. Hell, he could be good even with a proper arguement. He's just very lawful.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:04 No.7925685
    I don't consider it fiat if he leaves an opening in his plan. Sure, it's forcing her opinion to an extent, but it wouldn't be a random deus ex machina. That's the thing, if she wanted to, she could do that. Any DM always has that option, it's just that it's a very bad one. BTW, which fiat were ou refering to specifically? The eye of blight or what?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:14 No.7925794
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    No, he's gotten this far. Now its just a waiting game to see if he gets away with it. That's all that's left to this now.

    Once he waits out the month, he's done. He ensured that the war will continue on and that he makes his money.

    In other words, he's jumped his shark.
    >> OP !ZHZKskBiOw 02/04/10(Thu)19:18 No.7925836

    Oops, I meant Sleep and Flaming Sphere, Fireball is a level 5 Daily or so, Sleep is level 1
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:22 No.7925889

    She tried to fiat it away, the whole group called bullshit. Since then, she's been looking for openings, and not finding anything.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:32 No.7926017

    Assuming he doesn't decide to go farther. Become Royal Mage, wipe out the Elves forever.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:37 No.7926072






    I knew I should have stayed home today.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)19:48 No.7926243
    Phew. Goddamn. It took me a while to read through all the posts. Okay, I'll admit I started to skim about 3/4 of the way through.
    Do you guys realize a large part of this thread is just arguing? OP hasn't posted a lot and it seems to have gone off the track a bit.

    I've always seen RPing as a process of cooperative story telling.

    It sounds to me that the DM may have place a little bit too much personal interest and energy into setting up a story and something happened to take it off the tracks. The DM seems to be taking it rather well, and that she's rolling with it is a good quality IMHO. It suggests that she's thinking it through.
    I don't get the sense that anyone's terribly upset, save for the defender character, who seems to be pretty weak on RP.

    About kidnapping the princess: I can see a lot of things going wrong here, and I don't quite see what it would accomplish.

    Also, OP: you didn't say much about the Wretch Dragon, or what happened after the incident that resulted in the Guard Captain's death?
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)20:34 No.7926758
    Damn it Carlos, would you stop Heiling?
    You aren't even doing it right.
    >> Anonymous 02/04/10(Thu)20:54 No.7927029
    woo, I'm actually on for one of these.

    good job OP, you rock. keep up the awesome work!

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