>me playing tabletop with my dad>his half elf fighter is skirmishing against four dire orc warfangs >every time they roll their dice to attack they get bad luck and he dodges>"HOW BOUT THEM DODGERS SON" he says before attacking back>every>fucking>time
>>74318302imagine having parents that share your interests
>>74318412I need a great one liner to crush his stupid fucking smug face into the dirt when he finally does eat shit and die.
I almost started crying thinking about how I would love my dad to share even one of the my interests let alone play any kind of game with me. Never mind, a solitary tear rolled down my cheek before I even finished the post.
>>74318664yes but my dad is a smug fuck and his stupid half elf needs to get clapped so he can stop telling me that he thinks i'd be a great princess and that a strong dragon boyfriend is probably why I play fantasy tabletop DAD FUCKING STOP IT
>>74318302>>74318449if he tries to fight everything, send something his way that will obliterate his stupid assand when his fighter is dying, say>"HOW BOUT THEM DODGERS NOW, BITCH?!"
>>74318664I think its worse when your father does share them but never plays with you, thats my dad. I know he likes table top games and D&D and he even has coworkers that share it too and sometimes he playes with them but we never ever play together.
>>74318449You mean the character?
>>74318783He raised you wrong and can't own up to it. Don't worry, anon, strive to be a better man than him. Shouldn't be too hard.
>>74318766You're dad is based as fuck.You sound like a whiny bitch.
>>74318873Fuck you anon, imagine living with someone who fucks his wife on YOUR bed knowing you'll be home from work and walking in to see it.
>>74318302You should like an unappreciative child, OP. Hope it's not too late for your dad to slap some sense into you.
>>74318939Oh I appreciate him I just dont appreciate this bullshit RNG he is getting lately.
>>74318926Is his wife your mother? If not, he might be trying to bond with you by inviting you to tag team your stepmom.
>>74318926You're not helping your case. When you walk in on him fucking his wife on your bed, does he lock eyes with you and say, "How 'bout them Dodgers, son!"
>>74319070DAD GET OUT
>>74318302How bout them Dodgers, anon?
>>74319124Shut the fuck up you cheeky cunt.
>>74318449It sounds like your Dad is having a great time playing with you. Enjoy these good times.
How do I delete a thread?
>>74319180yeah just enjoy the moment OP. One moment your dad might be fine the next he might be clutching his chest on the floor, failing his death saves
>>74319180The only good time I'm going to be enjoying is when I get to throw his character sheet into the fireplace.
>>74319222You don't deserve to fuck your stepmom.
>>74318926He's sending you a message to get out of the fucking house.
>>74318766I wish your dad were posting here instead of you, he sounds fun.
>>74319314Oh yes, yes nothing like having a thread full of "Hey folks hows it goin? Now tell me, who'd win? I dream of genie or the witch from bewitched? If you ask me you could put both of them together in a mudwrestling ring and we'd find out together."
>>74319355Sounds better than the average thread here.
>>74319355lol>witch from bewitchedThat would be Samantha. But who would win between York vs Dick Sergeant?!
>>74319408Shut the fuck up the only thing you care about is mammaries slapping around in the mud while two girls grab at eachothers hair and flop around getting dirty all over just so they can get hosed off and do it again. You dont even give a shit about the theoretical power limits of the two and the capabilities they could wield against one another.>>74319430How would they fare in 40k
>>74319445>mammaries slapping around in the mud while two girls grab at eachothers hair and flop around getting dirty all overI need to watch Deathstalker again.
>>74319805Imagine my fucking disappointment when I asked him if we could stop in and get something to eat at Wendy's and he goes "Nah, this place is more your speed" and he pulls into fucking weenie hut Jr.
>>74319835What a chad. Top tier bantz.
>>74319873Oh yeah, totally top tier bantz making me get out and go across the street to Super Weeniehut Jr and then when I come back he's not even there anymore then he flies by doing 70 in a 45 and splashes me with roadside scum water. Totally cool. Fuck you.
>>74319909>The chad father>The virgin son
>>74319190Delete your System32 folder.
>>74319909Holy shit. Are you sure his your dad?Because you certainly didn’t inherit a sense of humour.
>>74319909I really admire your commitment to the bit here, it's very funny.
>>74318766Learn to handle bantz.
Ugh, it's just not satisfying. I landed blow after blow against his fighter and finally killed it and instead of being mad he just goes "Well gee, that was fun. Let's go again - I've got another half-elf fighter here, this is his brother in law Marty. See? This miniature has a mustache but the family resemblance is striking!"His figurine wasn't even custom painted and it was just a lego man glued to a beer cap.
>>74318302Well, what about them?
>>74321294Based beyond belief
>>74321347>>74321367How the fuck can you two idiots call that "based" it's lazy as fuck and it's part of the reason why people are getting stupider and gaming companies have to casualize shit and make trash like 5e.
>>74321387Relax anon.5e is shit, but if you walk in the path of Marty you will see it's more about the game you play and not about the pieces you play them with.How 'bout them Dodgers, son.
This is a blatant bait thread but I legitimately wish I had a player like this
>>74318302Maybe you should get better at dodging
>>74321457>it's not about the pieces you play them withAnd yet the man still makes me buy him dice because he keeps losing his when he and his buddies play Deadly Dice Pool, some stupid drunk game they play where they shoot the dice with the cue ball to roll it and then hit the loser with a plank.
>>74321539How many times do they plank you, anon?
>>74321619I don't play it because I don't enjoy larping. Grown ass men laughing and drinking beer calling it "healing potions" while they hit eachother for fun isn't my sort of thing. They tried to get me into it by hitting me and offering me a beer but 1 i dont drink and 2 that shit is barbaric.
>>74321692Should learn to dodge.
>>74321736Man, go fuck yourself.
>>74318449You sound like a fat, insufferable cunt. Lose weight and love your parents.
I feel sorry for OP's dad, what with him clearly having raised such a crybaby faggot son.
>>74321802I do love my parents I just hate that he's making a mockery of my tabletop game.>>74321804>t. black faggot whos dad left for cigarettes and then robbed his house years later
>>74321692>hates parents>lives with them>doesnt drinkunderageb& confirmed
>>74321930Yes just because I don't want to destroy my fucking liver being a tool pretending to enjoy things I dont like (who literally fucking WHO can tell me with a straight face they drink beer and like the taste fuck you you're a goddamn liar) that makes me automatically underage...... fuck off anime poster.
>>74321692Pussy.Have a beer with your dad and if you don't like getting hit; hit him first and tell him to fuck off.
>>74321990>g-go drink literal poison and assault people!No.
>>74321979I've polished off half a case in the last two hours. Some beer tastes fine, some not so much.
>>74322046Okay then, what beers are good that I can get a few for under $20? If it's good I'll try some with my dad. If not, I'm going to be upset with you.
>>74322002You're not drinking poison, you're having a beer you colossal faggot. On second thought, don't hit your dad. You'll probably break a nail.
>>74322104Okay one why the fuck would I assault my own dad and two why would I put a fucking nail in their planking board that's called MURDER anon.
>>74322079adults who want to drink either make delicious cocktails or they drink beer they've aquired a taste for. I dont recommend anyone drink, but I enjoy it now and then. Lot of alcohol tastes great though, but I think for a lot of people beer like Red Stripe and things really hits the spot on hot days. Plus, things like Gin+Tonic are scientifically proven to lower your body temperature. Alcohol is a helluva drug, and every alcohol is different. Tequila for instance, acts like a mild stimulant in small doses.Seriously though, I wouldnt drink if you arent happy with your life.
>>74321930Or he's an 18-20 unifag>t. 20 year old unifag
>>74322150Actually I don't care. I just wanted to prove a point that you're a filthy alcoholic and your mind and judgement is so fucking clouded you think it's okay to tell people to ingest shit that literally destroys lives. It's not cool, it's not trendy and if your social structure depends on you zonking out around other people well it just means you hate eachother enough that you have to cripple yourself just to tolerate one another.Get help. https://www.aa.org/1-800-662-HELP (4357)
>>74322203What am I witnessing?
>hurr durr drugs r bad mkay because I have no self control
>>74322301Clearly you don't. You woke up and decided to post shit-taste anime on the wrong board. >>>/a/
>>74322349>>74322203>>74321979>>74321692my sides are in absolute orbit
>>74321294What a fucking king.
I got to watch a family rip itself apart at the very last DnD game I participated in>Be friends with dude who heavily into DnD for over 10 years>About this time last year his wife starts joining us because they needed to figure out a way to bond>Takes her about 5 games but she starts kinda getting into it>Dude has an ongoing rival with a guy we'll call Robert.>Robert in general is a superior DM to him and recently got his son into DnD to apparent big success >Dude tries to match Robert's achievements and starts a new campaign with me, a friend, his wife, a female coworker and his son>His son is 9 years old, but whatever, I'm Dude's friend so I'm obligated to give him a chance>He starts the new campaign>One hour into it, the 9 year old son, I shit you not, sexually assaults the Female coworker's character ingame>Female Coworker just excuses herself from the game and leaves>Wife explodes at Dude over what the hell just happened at their table and an argument ensues>While the two are screaming at each other, I join the friend and he gives me a ride home as we get the hell out of dodge while the kid is just playing with a BB8 toy as the two parents enter into a how to raise their kid fight>Turns out this incident was so bad the two start divorce proceedings the following day or two after Dude has tried to rope me into two other campaigns since then but man, after seeing that son crash his parents marriage with no survivors, I don't want to be anywhere near them
>>74318302That’s hilarious. I’d love to play with your dad
>>74318766>He can't handle the bantz with his own dad.My dad is in the hospital right now and we're still roasting each other.
I hate that my dad just walked past my room, looked in and said "Hey son, dodge em." then hit me with a beanbag. Fucking millenials.
>>74318302Your dad has an open invitation at my table. Anytime
>>74318302OP doesn’t deserve his dad. Think about your life & do better. Make him proud
>>74318302It's hard not to cry with envy.
>>74318412This. OP crushed my soul.
>>74321367Woah, the family resemblance is striking
>>74323163holy shitthat kids gonna be traumatized because his parents were both dumbasses
Your dad is far too based for you OP, stop being such a faggot already
>>74319790Based and red pilled
>>74324968The Irony is I think the kid was acting out something he saw on TV or some such shit because he was giggling throughout the entire thing. Truth be told, the kid is spoiled something bad and this obviously isn't the first time the parents fought around him, like I said, he tuned them out and started playing with something. Props to the Female coworker who just packed her shit and left without a word. If I recall the details correctly, that was her first or second game of DnD and I wouldn't be surprised if I just witnessed the last game she would ever play. I don't want to speak ill of the Dude, he was our DM when no one else was like 10 years ago, but ever since we've had better DMs available to us and he becomes jealous easily. He drove off Robert by pissing off HIS wife in the middle of a campaign and has had a one sided rivalry ever since. But the big difference between the Dude and Robert is that Robert spends about two hours each day during the week the plan the next session, Dude just skims through a book 2 hours before the session starts so there was no fucking way Dude's games were going to have the same quality as Robert's. But what really slapped me in the face that session was it obvious the kid didn't have the attention span, nor the interest to play. It was just Dude trying to one up Robert. After the kid rolled to make his character kiss the female coworker's character, he should have just hit the breaks and moved the kid to the PS4 to play games or something else. But he didn't. And the kid moved on from forcibly kissing to groping her tits and other crap and the Dude just rolled with it while the rest of us were trying to signal him to fucking stop. He just wanted to tell everyone that his 9 year old son plays DnD so he could 1 up Robert and his 11 year old son. Got a divorce for his trouble.Thanks for reading my blog
>>74326247thank you for writing it, i love this shitthe lil fucker is gonna grow up to hate TTRPG's with a PASSION
>>74326565I wouldn't be surprised. The kid is more interested in Marvel then anything pen and paper and after what happened, I wouldn't be surprised if the kid starts acting aggressive towards 'the hobby that ruined his family' rather then blaming his dad's failings
Imagine having a dad that you want to talk to, let alone be in the same room with;_;fucking junkie
>>74318302>>"HOW BOUT THEM DODGERS SON" he says before attacking backYou should have said you're gay because your dad taught you to play ttrpgs instead of baseball so you don't get the pun.
>>74318302>me playing tabletop with my dadMy Dad isn't dead, but besides watching TNG as a family growing up, his liking astronomy and building computers, he hasn't given playing games a chance since Doom (dos), and has promptly shut down all chances I've extended to him to try playing either tabletop or vidya with me. With so many of my geeky pursuits having come from his example you'd think he'd be more open to that sort of thing but he turns his nose up at it every time.If your story isn't made up, I'm a bit jealous.
OP is genuinely pretty funny acting out this character, I would love to have him in my game. Seems like a good roleplayer.
>>74318302your dad sounds based and you sound like a queer. Imagine being so friendless your dad is the only person who will play with you, and still hating him.
>>74318783Have you ever asked him?He might be thinking there's no way a young lad would ever be interested in doing anything with an old fart like him.
kids who hate their parents really get to me on a personal level, even though it's a phase everyone goes through more or less. I'm gonna go the grave with regrets I can't fix anymore, if your parents are still around please love them and tolerate their bullshit because in the end no one in the world is going to ever be closer to you than they are.
>>74332404>tfw used to have serious problems with my mother>we sorted it out in the end
>>74326247An absolute shame. A bit of education in philosophy could have saved his ass. It saddens me that there are so many people that don't even try to stop comparing themselves to others, when all such comparison fosters are vapid and depraved thoughts and emotions.
>>74318302My dad is a raging alcoholic who did nothing but hurt and ruin not just my family, but a second one once my parents divorced. Now he is all alone with too much time and money for his own good.If this is real, treasure your dad. Others are not so lucky and would gladly take a bit of annoyance, if their parents where mentally sound.I still don't want to hate mine, even if he has brought nothing but suffering to everyone he was ever intimately involved with.
>>74332404>tfw mom used to be an abusive alcoholic when I liked alone with her up until I turned 12 where I got to choose where I wanted to live, immediately moving in with my dad instead>didn't ever want to see her anymore>timeskip to about half a year later>she had a terrible stair accident and landed in a hospital>never contacted or visited her while she was hospitalized despite her attempts to get in contact with me using family friends and whatnot>she stopped drinking and began trying to make amends when she got out of the hospitalCurrently we've got it sort of sorted out but she became this overly doting kind of parent and tries to spoil me at every opportunity she gets despite me telling her I don't want any of it. I can't stand being in one room with her for too long because she gets under my skin really easily, even if unintentional. I'd still wish I visited her at least once while she was hospitalized, the thought on how our relationship would've been if I were the one who made the first step is one that oftentimes runs through my head because I think she's still trying to make up for her mistakes even though it's more than 15 years ago now.Thanks for listening, /tg/.
>>74332404>kids who hate their parents really get to me on a personal levelI still hate my dad as an adult. When I was growing up, my mom divorced him and when I went over to his home during visitation, he did nothing but call my mom a fat whale and complain about child support to a fucking 8 year old. And that's ignoring the fact that he was more focused on getting fucking his various single mom girlfriends then bonding with his kids. If you find yourself divorced and you have a kid, PLEASE don't complain about your ex and child support in front of them, all the kid is going to hear is 'The person you love is being demeaned' and 'When I complain about Child Support, what I'm really saying is I regret having you'
>>74332532He's not hating on his father he's just letting us know about a funny annoyance he has. At least that's how I read it. Sorry about your situation though. Take care and fuck life right in her sopping wet pussy by becoming a better father than your father ever was.
>shitpost thread blooms into father bonding and trauma coping thread where genuine feels are okaywhat the actual fuck
>>74321185His dad probably hogged it all for himself.
>>74333586Reminds me of old /tg/
>>74319290>>74301241>You don't deserve to fuck your stepmom.The best fetish is stepdad turning his step-daughter into his personal slut alongside her mother and making them his fuckmaids
>>74318926Jokes on them I fucked a bunch of girls on my parents' bed in high school, usually with our cat watching
>>74334499That poor cat...
>>74318412This. Op is a whiney faggot. I wish my family took interest in my hobbies and things I liked.
>>74334499Your mom swallowed while she was pregnant with you.
>>74318449You respond with "I HEARD THEY LOST TO THE ANGELS! WHO LOOSES TO THE ANGELS?!"
Man... Godspeed fellas
>>74323163Lol what exactly did the kid do?
My mom was an emotionally.. stunted? person. She was always emotionally selfish & a little manipulative. My mom was also a pretty bad stoner, preferring to sit in her room & get high than spend time with her kids. My father was your classic blue collar construction worker who got drunk & slapped around his wife & kids. The odd thing was that he probably would have been a lot into /tg/ stuff if it didn’t make him uncomfortable to play “nerdy” stuff. Like, when we first got a home computer in the mid 00’s we also got Diablo II to play. My dad would come home late in the evenings & kick us off to play it himself. Sometimes he would literally play all night & go to work the next morning with no sleep. My parents got a divorce when I was a sophomore in high school & it really fucked me up. I still talk to my dad occasionally but he is a lowlife drug user & alcoholic still. I’d like to get him in a D&D game or something that isn’t “classic” nerd shit maybe something like Shadowrun. I feel like he might get into it
>>74332404When your father hates you because he's convinced you're not his (even though you look exactly the same as he does) and he used to threaten you and your mother with a knife it's a bit hard to "tolerate his bullshit"
>>74332404Legitimately not true.I love my parents dearly, but there are a number of people I love more than them. Those are the people I'm closest to.My parents and I have nothing in common, and I know for a fact that their love is conditional. They've abandoned me when I needed them most before. Conversely, my lover has stuck with me through thick and thin, and has been much more patient and firm with me than my parents ever were.Certainly, it's important to have a good relationship with your parents, but they're human beings, just like everyone else. That means they can be flawed, or even bump against you in ways that are hard to forgive.Love your parents if you can, but also don't be ashamed to be closer to and love someone else more.
>>74335274Elaborate. on what issue were you abandoned by your parents but not your lover?Just curious.
>>74335274God damn it I hate parents who spout the 'unconditional love' crapIgnoring that Unconditional love is an impossible state to be in (hey parent, what if I never existed, since your love is unconditional, you should still love me and trillions of hypothetical non-existent children since, your love being unconditional, can ignore the existence condition) you really shouldn't be telling your kids that your love doesn't have a breaking point. An example: Killing a sibling should be grounds for the cessation of love from a parent and is not unreasonable
>>74318302Look at the anon bitching despite having a father who is still alive.
>>74335426He's a homo
>>74318302>based dad being basedno problems here
>>74335274You sound like a faggot & you’re parents were right to leave you to your own devices rather than indulge you
>>74321294honestly me i can't wait
>>74318412Holy fuck OP, what dream realm do you hail from?I'd love if my parents took the slightest interest in my hobbies. AND you hate puns? You seriously don't deserve such an awesome Dad.
>>74334495What is >>74301241 talking about? Some sort of vidya or a visual novel?
>>74332404>mom beat me and sexually abused me as a kid>she tried to dress me up as a girl and was mentally convinced I was supposed to pop out of her a girl and for awhile tried to get my name changed and a bunch of retarded shit>she whipped/abused my dad to the point where he was a silent and depressed alcoholic>constantly drained our bank accounts and spent it on frivolous shit>she left a few years ago unannounced and hasnt tried to contact either of us since>dads in therapy and he adopted a dog>im getting better>we both pray we never see her againsometimes parents you have to cut off parents if theyre absolute garbage but I love my dad and I hear him chuckle from the other room when I do silly voices for my tabletop games and he always asks about them afterwards. hes a great guy.
>>74318412>>74336082My mom and I play Tabletop every weekend. Before this covid shit, we ran a regular game group between us and her two friends she met on the bus commute from work. All of us had great fun cutting down hundreds of zombies, slapping cards together in smashup, and exploring the darkest parts of Adam Poots' nightmare scape. Most recently I taught her how to play Monsterpocalypse and Gloomhaven. I love my mom!
>>74318926Are ya winning dad?
>>74323163Finally, a child one-ups that anon whose parents divorced after he cried at the Digimon movie
>>74337023>>she left a few years ago unannounced and hasnt tried to contact either of us since>>dads in therapyHave you checked under the patio?
>>74338931No son, I'm paying child support
>>74337023that's tough,except this part>>constantly drained our bank accounts and spent it on frivolous shitthat's normal
>>74321387Of course it's based. He glued it to a bottle cap.
>>74322150>>74322203>I don't recommend anyone drink
>>74318302>>74318449>>74321294>>74321387>>74321539>>74321692>>74321833>>74321979>>74322203cringe and bluepilled. pic related
>>74342318buddy incels get the rope
>>74318302I’m giving this thread a good old bumperino
>>74332506Its a hard pill to swallow, anon, even after years. Some people really are just stronger than others.
>>74335426Gee, I wonder what it could possibly be. It would be helpful if there was an extremely common situation in which this exact series of events happens
>>74342318>nice thread dealing with trauma and getting support from anons>Then this faggot shows up with his mgtow bullshitWhy must you be this way
>>74334433There's JUST enough OC here to revivify
>>74348809That can be literally anything, anon. My guess is your parents wanted a grandkid but you are gay.
>>74318412Yeah, if only.>Whenever my family played a board game, Mother spends 3/4 of the time looking at her phone or looking bored.>Thinks very negatively of my video game habits.>Doesn't like to read, only share occasional interest in a television show.Dad's alright, though.
>>74318302HOW BOUT THEM DODGERS SON
>>74332506>>74348671The irony is that the guy is a decent role player and wonderful player at the table. And when he's not trying to show superiority, he is wonderful person. But as much as he GMed for us years ago, he either needs to step up his game if he wants to be a really good GM or just enjoy being a character in a game. And all he needs to be a really good dad (from my outside perspective) is teach his son some social graces like not throwing pillows at us while we are gaming (truth be told we found it hilarious at the time which reinforced it positively to him) and I think he'll become a fine adult. The worst part is, I've been keeping my distance from him because I don't want to get dragged into family court where I may or may not have to testify against him or his ex. I've only seen Family courts make situations worse, and I'm scared shitless that a lawyer is going to lead me down a line of questioning where it paints him in the worst possible light and he loses his kid. I REALLY should be there as a shoulder for him to cry on or someone to just vent to, but here I am, posting about my trauma about watching another family's trauma because I haven't had anyone I can talk to about this for the last year or so.
>>74321294I wish this was real
>>74318302Imagine your dad being so much cooler than you.
Okay so last night was the worst night I ever had.My dad decided to try to DM for me and he was like "Okay son, you've got a bunch of orcs chasing after you and you see a minecart" so I hop in it and he starts playing indiana jones music and says "you jump in and the orcs hop in another one to start chasing you. take this." and he hands me an onion ring. "Now son, if you let that onion ring get destroyed, youre dead. Better dodge them orcs" and just as he say that his drunkass friends start cheering and coming in the house through open windows with dodgeballs. So I run and I get hit a few times and almost drop the onion ring, but I manage to make it out onto the front lawn and my 600 pound uncle joey is there, clotheslines me and then sits on my chest and takes my onion ring and eats it. Dad comes out with his friends and says "oooh, tough luck son looks like the ogre ate you"
>>74319355>implying this wouldn't be a massive improvement
>>74318302>Mfw I've been playing RPGs with my dad for 26 years.
>>74332404I agree, when kids had a normal or even semi normal childhood. But sometimes your mom is a druggy who abused and abandoned you and skipped town to do heroine with her new bf.
>>74332404>cheating dad that sucked the life out of everything he touchedKill yourself, faggot.
>>74356050The last time I saw my dad have fun was when he went to go get the hose during a watergun fight when you were 6after that it was all downhill from there
>>74318302Based dad dabbing on his tranny zoomer son who can't handle the banter
>>74321833Kek. What an autismo! Let the boomer have his fun. And an upbeat hero with a catch phrase is better than a lot of us get.
>>74321979Nigger, I've given up alcohol and I still drink non-alcoholic beer. Even my mom does. You're queer!
>>74355540I guess play time is ogre
>>74322203I just wanted to prove a point that you're a degenerate retard and your mind and judgement is so retarded that you think it's okay to tell retard to ingest retard that literally retards brains. It's not cool, it's retarded, and if your social structure depends on you retarding out around other retards well it just means you retard retard enough that you have to retard yourself just to retard one another. Get retard. https://www.autismspeaks.org(888) 288-4762
>>74318766you're still a little princess for your daddythat's cute
>>74318412My dad introduced me to MtG 15 years ago, we still play regularly.