Deep inside the sprawling fortress-city referred to by all but the most pedantic of Inquisitors inhabiting it as "Sector Headquarters", No-Longer-Acting-Inquisitor Greg Sargent straightened his orange jumpsuit as the holding room door he'd spent the better part of seven hours staring at finally creaked open. The two Inquisitorial Stormtroopers flanking the door, who'd been stuck standing reflexively at attention for the entire time, breathed a little sigh of relief and hastily led the way into the courtroom on the far side.The four other Stormtroopers in the room relaxed as well as the impromptu poker tournament that'd been occupying the rest of the squad ended without further bloodshed and Aimy, as winner, put Doc and Tink in charge of collecting Twitch. While to two of them extracted the demolitions trooper from the pile of furniture he'd squirreled himself away in, Nubby collected the cards he'd "borrowed" and scooted the chair he'd subsequently been cuffed to over to the borrow-ee, who grudgingly uncuffed him. The Stormtrooper blinked in confusion as the little trooper sidled off after his companions without returning the cards, or the cuffs for that matter; he shared a pained look with the other Stormtroopers as they followed the guardsmen into the courtroom. By unanimous silent agreement, the unholy mess that'd once been the court's tastefully-decorated holding room was left for the janitorial staff to discover for themselves.
yes. Yes. YES!
>>62972087IT IS TIME
>>62972087God bless, it's Shoggy time! Glad to see you alive and kicking, man!
There goes my night.Aaaaand, I'm hard.
>>62972087I have a freaking migraine but I AM HERE ANYWAYand wooooow, even Inquisitorial stormtroopers aren't immune to the party...
Does the party finally get off the boat, er.. ship?
What shall we call this chapter?"The All Guardsmen Party Goes to Prison?"
so happy shoggy made it, hang in there
>rfw you catch it live.
>>62972202All Attourney Party: Turnabout GuardsmenWhere the prosecution is beaten because they went insane trying to get a straight answer out of Nubby on the stand
So much for going to sleep early.
>>62972087>getting this part out right here and now: >This won't be the whole final chapter. It won't even be a whole half, hell I can't even promise more than ten to fifteen posts.>In short, I'm two months behind on sleep, on the tail end of a dose of painkillers, and debating having my entire fucking jaw removed if it'll just fucking fix either of those things.>I'll get there, in fits and starts if need be, but the clean-up on this terrible and if you've got anything remotely better to do I wouldn't recommend hanging out there. All that said, here it is: the beginning of the end.
>>62972251Oh god, an awful idea just popped in."Ace Guardsmen Attorney: OBJECTION!"
There goes my evening! Thank you Shoggy!
>>62972202Orange is the New Heresyi'd make a photoshopped poster if my head wasnt hurting now
>>62972087Ok Shoggy, i gotta ask because its something thats been killing me: Which character are you? My money is on either Twitch or Nubby since you seem to put a hell of a lot more details into how they think and feel
>>62972296IIRC he mentioned he was Nubby a few times.
>>62972271That's rough shoggy, hope you get better dude.
>>62972305AHA! well that does it, just need to cap confirmation and i win a 200$ bet
Hey Shoggy, I want you to thank you for all the entertainment you've brought me over the years! I hope that your stories will be published officially one day!
>>62972296It's been stated before somewhere (can't bothered to go digging) that he was Nubby.
>>62972288>the entire court objects to Nubby's presence, and then object to his very exsistence>The note from the Commisar that he is a human becomes offical Inquisitorial evidence>Twitch accuses everyone of being an ork in disguse>they then have to cross-examine Twitch's statements>the Prosecutor makes a remark about Aimy's hairthere's so many things that can go wrong, it's glorious
>>62972271Ouch. All my sympathies Shoggy, hope you start feeling better over the next week.
>>62972325It's in one of the sup/tg/ archived threads, if you want for evidence
>>62972087As the six Guardsmen quite literally trooped into the courtroom the robe and wig-wearing Inquisitor sitting at its head took them in with the boredly-hopeful expression of someone who was almost done for the day. That expression soured as a one of the court's side-doors opened to admit a cart bearing a teetering meter-high pile of binders, folders, loose papers, dataslates, and precariously balanced scrolls. With an annoyed glare at the scribe hidden somewhere behind the cart, the Inquisitorial Judge plucked the topmost binder off the pile and cleared his throat."Greg Sargent, you and your men stand accused of… parking in a restricted area?" The Inquisitor paused and flipped to the next page, "Failing to vacate in a timely manner?" he flipped farther, "Loading or Unloading a Vehicle in a No-Loading Zone? Really?" There was a mutter of "it weren' posted or nuthin" from the end of the line of guardsmen and one of the Stormtroopers made a choking sound. The Inquisitor shot a glare at both of them as he snapped the binder shut pulled the next one off the pile and cleared his throat again. "Greg Sargent, you and your men, you stand accused of Attempting to Bribe a Traffic… Excuse me for a second." The Inquisitor leaned over the side of his desk to glare at the cart-load of files and the figure behind them until he was finally rewarded with a slightly quavery reply. "What? Do you need help with the long words or something?" Ignoring the increasing snickering, and entirely missing the look of confused recognition on three of the guardsmen's faces, the Inquisitor leaned further and gritted his teeth. "Why. Are. They. HERE?""They're just more of Quercus' idiots. Obviously." Sarge's eyes widened slightly, Twitch let out a faint giggle, and Doc abruptly started blushing as a familiar gray-haired woman in adept's robes shuffled out and extracted a leather folio from the middle of the pile. "Did you think I'd schedule a real case this late in the day?"
holy fuck, caught live
>>62972271Don't sacrifice yourself over a bunch of anons and don't feel pressed to write - your real life is more important. Hope it gets better for ya!
>>62972414OOOOOH it's her! This'll be fun!
>>62972271Shit man, if you need a break then by all means, do so. We can wait, no problem- your health comes first.
>>62972271take your time shoggy, as much as we love the guardsmen personal health is mildly important
>>62972414Diplomacy adept returns, huzzah!
>>62972087With my burning question answered Shoggy, i want to personally thank you for weaving such a wonderful tale for us! Everytime I read and reread your story I am always brought to laughter, tears, anger and hope. You have truly played and written a masterpiece worthy of being official cannon! My friends and I are currently playing a game of DH, and my character named Sergei Kozin (Basically a valhallan guardsman using a heavy bolter modeled after Lenny from "Of mice and men" but 8ft tall and has a pet white valhallan snow rabbit) has befreinded a certain NPC named Jitters because of the wonderous stories of adventure he tells Sergei before he goes to sleep on the ship inbetween inquisitorial deployments. No matter where you are or where you go Shoggy, just know your story will live on in the hearts of thousands of warhammer fans around the world! Emperor bless you my man!
>>62972414>They are actually on trial for the parking ticketsI'm fucking dying already. It's fantastic.
>>62972476Well, it was mentioned in one of the earlier chapters that the tickets arrived just in time for the trial.
>>62972087IT'S BACKTHE RIDE WILL NEVER END
>>62972292It's probably better camo than guard-issue.
>>62972271>Been keeping an eye on tg for the past 2 hours since i can't remember which part or North America shoggy lives in.>Started playing witcher.>Oh fuck shoggy posted, time to read.And fuck mate.. Sister tried to get her wisdomteeth puled out, which i think is about as painfull as a rootcannal surgery, so i have seen to pain.I would have been fine if you didn't post until new year, your stories are that good. One last thing: How long until all your teeth fuckery is over?
Catching this live just made my whole week
>>62972414The Inquisitor's expression brightened as he opened the folio. "I see... " he looked back up to the Adept. "So all this is just-" he gestured at the teetering pile of documents.The Adept shrugged. "Like I said, idiots.""Hmmm, quite." The Inquisitor sat up, straightened his wig, and cleared his throat for a third time. "Greg Sargent, as servants of a Rogue Inquisitor you and your men are hereby sentenced to-""Wait!", interrupted by Tink, "You can't just sentence us! What about our trial?"Nubby stepped forward as well. "Yeah, you didn' even ask if we was guilty or not!"The Inquisitor raised an eyebrow. "Are you saying you're NOT part of Inquisitor Quercus' criminally oversized retinue?" "Yes!" Tink paused, "I mean no, but we definitely didn't do any of that other stuff.""An' if we did, we 'ad orders." added Nubby, completely ignoring the boot repeatedly slamming into one of his augmetic shins.The Inquisitor raised his other eyebrow. "Ah, I see. So you're saying your Inquisitor ordered you to," he looked down at one of the binders, "Assault, Abduct, and otherwise Obstruct a Traffic Officer in the Performance of Their Duties?""Well, he might have..." Tink trailed off as he finally registered the glares of his comrades."An' we definitely 'ad orders for the stuff wit the Zoan- OW!" Nubby doubled over as Sarge stepped forward.'Yes sir." Sarge cleared his throat. "Those, uh, traffic offenses were committed in the performance of our duties. All of them." The Inquisitor turned his gaze to the noncom, who stared not-quite-back with the blankly fixed expression employed by soldiers receiving discipline since time immemorial. After several seconds the man shook his head, shot an annoyed glance at the massive pile of files and the Adept behind them, and sighed. "Noted. Greg Sargent, as servants of a Rogue Inquisitor you and your men are hereby sentenced to Stasis Imprisonment until such a time as the matter of your Inquisitor's loyalty has-"
>that cut off wordGot me on the edge of my seat Shoggy
>>62972650Once again the Inquisitor was interrupted, this time by a cough from the Adept and single envelope being pushed up onto his desk. He glared at the elderly woman, who grinned back innocently until he finally sighed and extracted the envelope's contents. After a few seconds of reading he paused; his eyes skipped down to the signature at the bottom of the letter and then up to scan the line of guardsmen until they settled on the white-haired guardswoman in the center. "Oh dear, this is a regrettable situation isn't it?" He glanced to the side, "One I certainly could've been informed of BEFORE the trial started."The Adept just rolled her eyes and pointed a bony finger at the letter.The Inquisitor looked back down and continued reading until his expression suddenly cleared. "Hmmm, that's certainly an.. unexpected suggestion." He tapped his fingers on the letter for a few seconds then looked down to the Adept again. "Not a bad one though. Surprisingly reasonable all things considered." The Adept prodded the massive pile of documents between them. "It would save on the paperwork..."The Inquisitor's lips twitched ever so slightly. "And it certainly never hurts to stay on good terms with the sector Militarum. Yes..." he sat up, straightened his wig, and returned his gaze to the assembled guardsmen. "Greg Sargent. This court has decided that, in recognition of you and your men's years of faithful Militarum service and your status as associates of the Lady General Von Humpeding, the charges against you will be deferred indefinitely, and you will be given a chance to redeem yourselves of any crimes you may have committed through service in the Penal Legions. Dismissed"The shocked silence that followed the gavel strike was broken by single, rising growl. "That scheming, conniving, two-faced, lying," guardsmen and Stormtroopers alike scrambled back, "RAT-FUCKING-BASTARD, TOLD MY MOTHER!?">The All Guardsmen Party and the Inquisitorial Penal Legion
I HAVE FINALLY CAUGHT IT LIVE!!!!!
>>62972087>be drunk as shit for mates 18th>have to get up early for college tomorrow>bound to be hungover to shit>see thisWelp, i guess i get to be hungover and tired as fuck
>>62972825>Told my MotherI can't wait to meet Mama Aimy.
>>62972825I'm guess Aimy will be invited to Oak's execution squad now.
>>62972825Same old lady who was helping them back in Heretic Purging?Always got Nanny Ogg/Granny Weatherwax vibes, what with all the other Discworld references. Mostly Nanny Ogg.
Gentlemen, it has been an honor to read with you
>>62972087>new AGP>right as I need to go to bedWhy did I ever stop being a neet?
>>62972825>The All Guardsmen Party and the Inquisitorial Penal Legion
>>62973022Honestly, It'd only be a matter of time untill Sarge is in command of the whole Penal Legion, and then it's no longer the All Guardsmen Party, and more like the All Guardsmen Legion. Maybe the Astropaths will tell everyone's it's the terrible Rogue Inquisition Agent, Greg Sargent's Secret Evil Army(tm) and they all camp out on a derlicit space hulk that ravages entire sectors, or some shit
>>62972825I can't only think of her mom as a woman version of general sturnn.Truly glorious.
> penal legion
>>62972825>TOLD MY MOTHER!?Uh oh!... darn it, why do I not have a popcorn-related reaction image?
>>62973105>Honestly, It'd only be a matter of time untill Sarge is in command of the whole Penal Legiononly because everyone else died.
The Emperor has blessed us this night, SHOGGY'S BACK.
>>62972825So no shit, there we were, being hauled off to die the Penal Legions, just like our old Commissar always said would happen. Honestly, it really shouldn't have come as a surprise, especially given Oak's little comment about arranging for us to get a "shorter sentence". After all, the average life expectancy of a Penal Legionnaire is probably somewhere between one and zero battles. Needless to say, we weren't exactly thrilled with our oh-so-clever Inquisitor, though none of us could quite reach Aimy's level of simmering rage. It'd taken three Stormtroopers with shock batons to end our markswoman's little fit; she only really started to calm down once she got a chance to read the letter that the Adept handed her as she was dragged out. We honestly thought the part where her mom said she understood it was all Inquisitorial political bullshit, wasn't her fault, and would always love her were all very touching. Less so the bit about how she didn't have to worry about disgracing the Von Humpeding name, because they'd already arranged to have her posthumously disinherited and struck from all family records if she died before the charges were cleared. Aimy took some comfort in it at least; said it was proof her mother actually wrote the letter herself.Sarge got an envelope from the Adept as well, but it turned out to just a wad of official paperwork and transfer orders. Given the way the sarcastic old bat had choreographed the whole farce we'd sort of expected something more, you know, secret orders-y? Maybe a little note explaining just where this top secret evidence-storage facility Oak wanted us to infiltrate was, and how in the Emperor's name we were supposed to accomplish this while stuck in a bloody Penal Legion? The only even remotely relevant thing Doc and Tink found in there was a bit saying we had ten days to claim our property out of evidence before it was all incinerated. We somehow doubted we'd be given a day off from penal-legioning to do so.
Praise be to TextToSpeech autists for letting me catch this live
>mfw moar All Guardsman Party
>>62973246>only because everyone else died.Please, Sarge is pratically de-facto in command everytime shit goes south. It's a Penal Legion, so shit is always hitting the fan. He's basically going to be the boss the second everyone higher up is too busy, useless or dead to do something about a given situation, which means Sarge is in command 90% of the time like always
Thank you to anyone who served, and thank you Shoggy for this epic story.
>>62973269>just like our old Commissar always said would happenHAH!>noble stuffNobles, just... nobles.Then again, depending on how vicious the von Humpedings' planetary culture is, that sort of thing might be a really serious corcern.Is Oak actually expecting them to desert from a PENAL LEGION to pull this of!?
>>62973358Go back to your home board /pol/troon.
>>62973358Storytime isn't /qst/GTFO
>>62973358... this is a storytime, no currently ongoing roleplay involved.
>>62973373>Is Oak actually expecting them to desert from a PENAL LEGION to pull this of!?Well, maybe the entire penal legion will desert along with them. You never know.
>>62972145>>62972290>>62972326>>62972444>>62972459>>62972461Thanks guys. Just, thanks. Good to see you all again.>>62972575I've got no fuckin idea, it was supposed to be "over" on round one, four rounds of "let's adjust x and see if it gets better over the next week or two"l later and they finally just ripped the whole damn nerve out, and that still hasn't done the trick. On the bright side it forced me to either quit drinking so that's a thing.>>62972954Yep, apparently she was one of Oak's inner circle.
>>62973408It's these guys, and a certain adept backing them up, so OF COURSE the entire legion is coming with them! That or dying as a distraction while they steal a Leman Russ...
>>62973358>being this new
>>62972954I just knew she was coming back at some point. Too bloody awesome not to!!
A live one. Guess I’ll finally learn the value of patience.
>>62973435Actually, anyone want to bet the Penal Legion is going to be owned by Rupert? It'd be fantastic if they go from Penal Legion to Inquisitorial Personal Goonsquad in about five seconds just because Rupert decided to have a chat with his old drinking buddy/war mate/family friend
>>62972825>Penal LegionOh God
>>62973306i'm saying there won't be a penal legion left to order around by the time natural selection makes sarge the boss around time.it's like a janitor becoming president because he's the last government employee alive. yea he's the president but it's not much of a promotion.
>>62973481It looks like the whole crew is coming back, so that would make some sense. Something like it, at least.
>>62973312Is that from something games workshop put out?
>>62973525 Picture yes, text no.
>>62973269We didn't have too much time to dig through the Adept's packet for more clues, or to bitch about how stupid the whole situation was for that matter. We'd expected to be shipped across the planet or system to some munitorum depot, but as it turned out the HQ had their very own Penal Legion stationed on-site, presumably to save on gas or something. After a short drive, the Stormtroopers hauled us out and we got our first look at our new home: "Camp Redemption" as the big sign over the gate declared it, or "The Dump" if you went by the spray paint under it.Honestly, it didn't really look that bad: if you ignored the fact that all the defences were pointed INWARDS it could've passed for pretty much any other Guard camp we'd seen. Same prefab buildings, same drill yards full of sweating grunts, same ankle-deep mud. Hell, it even had the same smell; that wonderful combination of body odor, pit latrines, stale rations, and spilled prometheum. Sarge took a deep nostalgic breath, as did Twitch and Nubby, Aimy just made gagging sounds.Now the camp's occupants on the other hand… We'd apparently arrived right at some sort of muster, but we didn't pay the thousand or two shaved and bomb-collared troopers much mind. No, the first thing our trained guardsman senses noticed was the sheer number of Commissars strutting around. Your typical regiment, in as much as there is such a thing in the Guard, tends to sport around one Commissar per company, or even less if you were one of them fancy pants nobby regiments; we spotted what had to be at least one pointy-hatted bastard per platoon, and that wasn't all. Instead of the Arbite shock-squads we expected to be keeping discipline in the ranks, the lanes between each platoon were patrolled by squads wearing the blue-trimmed coats and eagerly homicidal expressions of baby Commissars.Twitch informed the rest of us that we were all going to die. For once, nobody argued with him.
>>62973433>they finally just ripped the whole damn nerve out, and that still hasn't done the trick.Holy CRAP.Take care if yourself and don't rush on our account, Shoggy! Health is more important than entertaining people.
>>62973433That's super rough man, sorry to hear about that. For all the joy I've gotten from reading your stories, that you have to fight through pain to even put up more doesn't seem right. Thanks for what you've done and continue to do, and I genuinely hope your doctors and dentists get their shit together to resolve what's ailing you.
>>62973545>Twitch informed the rest of us that we were all going to die. For once, nobody argued with him.
>>62973545>patrolled by squads wearing the blue-trimmed coats and eagerly homicidal expressions of baby Commissars.Oh fuck
>>62973545>small army of CommissarsBy the Emperor. Have the Guardsmen been somehow sent to the Eye of Terror?
>>62973433Jesus fucking Christ. Have you considered getting a second opinion? (asking since it sounds like the people who are "helping" you are total quacks).>Forced me to quit drinking.AAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHOh and so far i love where this is going.
>>62973433>they finally just ripped the whole damn nerve out, and that still hasn't done the trick.good god
>>62973433As someone who's had the unfortunate experience of having to have gone through a root canal, I just wanna say that I feel for you, man.
>>62973641Is this overkill or not? (don't know too much about dentistry, but even to me it sounded bad)
>>62973545oh shitoh shitis that one commissar from the training mission there
>>62973689No, he ate a orbital lazer. I bet they are all just as bad as him though.
>>62973689Nah, he fell behind and died to the ORBITAL BOMBARDMENT.
>>62973688It's a botched root canal solution, if he's still in pain it's because they've also managed to damage his jaw and/or there could be infections that might require more surgery
>>62973688i don't know a lot about what's actually wrong with it and it doesn't sound like the dentists working on it do either. if they took out a nerve and it still hurts it's likely it may be not what they think because if they take out a nerve you don't really feel much of anything
>>62973433They took your nerve and your drinking?!Sue them to death. Emotional Trauma.Thanks for doing these stories, they've meant a lot.
>>62973443>Enabling this made-up reddit bullshit
>>62973688https://i.imgur.com/KVbGBHi.gif>>62973712We're not quite at "botched" yet, I may have exaggerated the extent of the face-drilling. Actual dental surgery is at least 2 steps of failure farther down the line than I am currently.
>>62973525Call it liquid inspiration. I just wrote it myself.
>>62973747I'm not clicking that gif shoggy. I know it's probably gore, or dentist related. Or maybe it's tainted by chaos.Chaos dentists of Khorne.
>>62973783Don't worry, it's just a root canal simulation.
>>62973747The thing about botching something is, do you really know whether it was botched until after the fact?Best of luck in any case.
>>62972087I caught it live!
I got to see it before the end.Bless you Shoggy.Also, do you have anymore storytimes after AGP ends?
>>62973827I knew it, it was actually a gif of Ork Painboys in action all along! I'm going to need several detpacks to solve this
>>62973545Our grim speculation was interrupted by the arrival of one of those cadet-commissar squads, led by a particularly unpleasant looking real one carrying a whip. The Commissar, a weasel-faced bastard somewhere between 60 and 600 depending on how much juvenant they'd pumped into him, angrily informed that Stormtroopers that they were late. After a bit of confusion about the transfer orders and why in the Emperor's name they'd given them to us, he ordered his minions to just chain us all together and get us in formation; he'd process us and send back the uniforms later.The Legion had almost finished forming up in a platoon-wise grid by this point. We were led to an empty spot at the near corner, where Sarge was instructed to stand out as far as the ankle-chain would allow and the rest of us lined up behind him. Satisfied that we were capable of standing at parade rest without any motivational whipping, the old Commissar told us not to move or say anything, and stalked off to stand at the head of our column.The reason for the parade became clear when a Scribe with a dataslate and an especially fancy Commissar (who we assumed was the base Commander) arrived and announced that the Inquisition was looking for volunteers. To our surprise, they actually got them, at least at first. At the back of our line, Twitch claimed that this was a clear sign that they were drugging the rations. Doc, who was in the spot ahead of him, actually took him seriously enough to look around and check for signs in the other Legionnaires, and got reminded of the "no moving" rule by the old Commissar and his whip. We watched as three whole platoons of chumps stepped forward were loaded up into transports, followed by two more that were more traditionally "volunteered" by the Commissars, and then Scribe announced that the rest of what his Inquisitor needed were specialists, starting with a demolitions expert. The old Commissar checked the papers we'd given him and stepped forward.
>>62972825Anon called it.
>Inquisitor Oak>Inquisitor OrkHow did Twitch not make this deduction.
>>62973921>Twitch gets volunteeredThe All Guardsmen Party blows up the middle of the Inquisitorial headquaters.
I expected Voluntold more than Volunteered
>>62974029Is this where we discover that Twitch replaced most of his bodily fluids with promethium some time ago?
>>62972087Heya shog, good to see you about
I hope the dead party members turn up in this one even though they aren't on the border horizon.
>>62974077Most likly. Twitch trancended himself and his own limits, and became the bomb he always knew he could be.
I'm sure it all works out for the better (ha!)
>>62973747Jesus fucking christ... again). Fuck man i hope your next teeth surgery goes better. Or... just pull the fuckers out and replace them with new ones.(Thingy where you screw new fake teeth into poeple).Best of luck to you though, say too if you need help.
Wooh, caught one live for once. Can't believe it's almost over.
>>62974159>just pull the fuckers out and replace them with new onesYour trip sounds agonizingly prescient on this matter.
No story before and probably after has had me laughing so loud, so long, and so often. Emperor bless your band of merry fuck-ups, and you for sharing their shenanigans with us.
>>62974192With how my family teeth are, we/i have had a need to use a pipe wrench to get our milk-yuong teeth out. With one of the dentist i had they botched a job, my parents and i decided to fix it manually. (it was a milk tooth, it would not budge until my mom took a pipe wrench to the fucker and yanked it out).
reminder we are 7 posts in of a potential 10-15, as stated here>>62972271Try not to push Shoggy too hard, and keep the thread alive as much as possible
>>62973921Fortunately for us, the specialist positions must've had slightly higher requirements than "literally the first idiot you find", because the Scribe and Commander came down into the ranks to inspect the candidates. They did, of course, start with our end of the regiment, but we didn't have to do anything drastic to get Twitch off the hook. All it took was one look at the strung-out demo trooper, his own proud declaration that he didn't just know explosives he SLEPT with them, and a single Ork-related accusation in the Commander's direction for the Scribe to decide to move on to the next candidate.Once the headhunting party passed us we began to notice whispering and occasional movements in the legionnaires around us. None of us were close enough to the other platoons to really catch what was going on, aside from it obviously being related to avoiding volunteering. Since that old Commissar was far too close and attentive for us to consider shifting closer, we didn't pay any of it much mind until a scuffle in the back ranks of our column drew the Commissars' attention away, and someone behind Twitch muttered "Punch Greg next pass". The demolition trooper turned to stare in confusion at leader of the platoon behind him, a large muscle-bound dark-skinned man, and asked who "Greg" was. This was apparently not the correct response.The dark-skinned platoon sergeant, who Twitch was fairly certain hadn't been there earlier, rolled his eyes and repeated himself twice, then made a frustrated noise and finally clarified to "Punch Greg Sargent, your Interrogator, RIGHT NOW." Twitch gave him a fish-eyed look and gestured at the chains connecting his ankles to Docs and the distance to Sarge out in front of the line, eliciting more eye rolling until finally realized what was going on and passed the message on to Doc, then to Aimy, Tink, and finally Nubby. The short trooper glanced between Sarge's back and the returning Commissar, and then told Tink to ask what for.
This is the best dang thing to come out of /tg/ in ages, Shoggy you are a good storytimer. Twitch is the greatest character. I hope dem painboys fix up ya teef good n proppa..
>>62974407>Punch Sarge, do itSomeones going to get decked with the mechanical hand.
>>62974407>punch mechanical handed grump man in front of Commisars in a penal legion Its such a bad idea, it can't NOT work out!
>>62974407>Told tink what to ask forIs nubby demanding payment for punching greg?
>>62974526to be honest i think most people would want to get paid before having to punch sarge
>>62974526Nah, as in "Why?"
>>62974501No, nubby is asking why he has to punch sargeGet a text comprehension
>>62974564>get a text comprehension >quotes wrong postwhelp
>>62972896YOU LIE!It's Armistice Day tomorrow! What kind of disrespectin', shit-taste, historically disinclined fuckwits do you have in charge of your school?
holy shit i caught it live
>>62974556Shoggy what do you think of my AGP theme'd Kill Team im using for 40k
>>62974460Or lit on fire with the resulting glare.
>>62974407>All it took was...his own proud declaration that he didn't just know explosives he SLEPT with themThose fools never learned just what they missed out on. Then again, he would've been wasted on such a mission anyhow.
>>62974651Thin your paints/10Otherwise it's a neat idea anon
>>62974651One thing i learned from /tg/ is that paint can never be too thin. Thin them paints
>>62973747>Sees image.Ehem.FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE!Nope. Nuhuh. No Way. Fuck that. Fuck this. Fuck them. Fuck me. Fuck You. Fuck off. IM OUT!Dental work is the worst.
Welcome back Shoggy!
>>62973433Christ, Shoggy, don't force yourself to keep posting if you're still dealing with this stuff. We can wait.
So, as an Anon who has never had their wisdom teeth removed, would someone mind informing me if the pain Shoggy is gowing through is common?
Hey Shoggy, if they didn't botch the root canal it may be that a ligament in your jaw is broken and giving you the pain.
>>62974936It's like asking a Ork Painboy for a medical checkup
>>62974191BROCK AND HIS ELF SAYS HI
>>62974956Getting your Wisdom Teet removed?Or the circumstances Shoggy has been dealing with?Either way, that's a vivid description...
>>62974936It really depends. I had significant tingling and intermittent sharp pain (like, would make me drop things I was holding and swear fit to raise the devil) for about 2 months afterwards. But my wisdom teeth were really deeply impacted and the gums grew back funny. Took 5 months for intermittent nerve tingling to die down as the gums finished filling in the holes. Fun times.
>>62975054we get it anon, its here.
>>62974936>>62975006As an anon who had his wisdom teeth removed ~6 years ago Shoggy is the unluckiest motherfucker out there.When I had my wisdom teeth out I was on Percocet which is oxycodone and acetomenophine. I was down to a half-dose by the end of the next day and completely off it by the end of the 2nd day, only taking Advil if I got a pain flare-up. Solid food hurt for about 6-7 days and I mostly ate yoghurt, oatmeal, and ice-cream, and mostly at room temperature cause too hot or cold hurt. The bleeding stopped by the 2nd day and the stitches dissolved by the 4th or 5th.I got the teeth out on a Friday afternoon and by the next friday I was ordering pizza for lunch with my buddies like we always did (albeit slightly painfully) by 8-9 days there was no more pain unless something sharp or hard directly pressed on the scarred-over tissue.It's worth saying that while my upper wisdom teeth were no problem (one had almost actually come through) my bottom ones were heavily impacted and had rotated almost 45 degrees inside my gum. The surgery bit required me to be anaesthetised and doped up on painkillers right when I came to (though mostly cause I'm a pussy when it comes to surgery and stuff)
Is any anons going to say anything that isn't about teeth?
>>62975081i'm just happy shaggy's back and is still as great a writer as ever.
>>62975081NO GIMME YER TEEF YA GIT OR I KNOCKS EM OUT AND TAKES EM
>>62975081AINT LIKE YOU'RE USING YOURS KEEPIN THEM IN YER 'EAD
>>62975081Probably not. Even in the best of circumstances, getting your wisdom teeth out absolutely sucks, and it looks like Shoggy has gotten absolutely boned by a potential combination of Quacks and bad luck.
>>62975099yeah im happy he is back too, still
>>62972087SHOOOOOOOGGGGYYY oh god I came
>>62974407The message was passed back down the line to the platoon sergeant, who went bug eyed, but didn't manage to get an actual reply out before the Scribe, just a few platoons away, announced that the last man he needed was someone with a bit of command authority. As the Scribe asked the Commander had anyone properly Sergeanty, Twitch abruptly got the point, and passed the message to "JUST PUNCH SARGE DAMN IT!" back up the line, where it once again stalled at Nubby and Tink, who both took one look at the watching Commissar and his whip, and then nominated eachother to do the actual punching. The ensuing argument over whether Nubby or Tink would make the less suitable Sarge-assaulter was interrupted by a string of curses and Aimy charging past them at Sarge's back. One spot farther back in line, Doc looked down at the chain connecting his ankles to Aimy's just in time to see his feet fly out from under him. Nubby and Tink watched as the markswoman slammed face-first into the mud next to them, blinked, and then immediately resumed their argument, paying absolutely no attention to the approaching Commissar. Fortunately for the pair, before the actual whipping could start, attention was taken off them by the sudden arrival of the dark-skinned Legionnaire, who's flying tackle hit Sarge hard enough to pull both the arguing troopers down as well. Twitch, as the only guardsman left standing, watched with a certain amount of satisfaction as the Sarge pulled the Legionnaire off him and did his level best to kill the man until the fight finally broken up by several cadets armed with shock-batons. In the silence that followed the exciting round of noncom mud wrestling, the Clerk asked if the Commander if he'd been drugging the rations again.
>>62972087THE TIME HAS COME AND SO HAVE I
Thank you for continuing to share.
>>62972271Christ man that's rough. Hope it doesn't last too long
>>62974651Pretty cool man, looks like you used a Mordarian for Aimy, but I don't recognize the Sniper Rifle from anything, so I'm assuming you cannibalized it from another TT game's kit. Cool stuff.
>>62974936Noooo. Wisdom teeth removal is a single operation. It usually takes anaesthesia followed by a week on the couch with the serious prescription painkillers that don't actually get rid of all the pain but help you forget about it afterwards (and nothing resembling solid food-- seriously, if the dentist says no solids DON'T TRY SOLIDS) but it's a routine procedure that gets over and done with.It's not fun, but it's not repeated and drawn-out not-fun.
>>62975234>the Clerk asked if the Commander if he'd been drugging the rations again>againCommander, combat stims are for COMBAT, not chow time!
>>62974936My dentist has been nagging me for the last few years to get mine pulled. He retired and the new dentist who took over the practice also told me I'd need them pulled. This thread is seriously making me not want them pulled.
>>62974936Mine were growing sideways in my jaw. They had to do things to it.
>>62975376Better sooner than later anon. The longer you wait if you need them pulled the more impacted they may become and the more serious the surgery becomes
>>62975376Trust me, *get them pulled* the faster you do it the less you can worry about the nagging feeling.
>>62975376Ive had dentists tell me for years that i should get the teeth yanked. come a decade later and they're fine. xrays showing these cunts ain't moved a bit, and ain't no trouble at all. sometimes these dentist types just in it for the preventative. it's more likely they'll get fucked eventually instead of not so pull em and not worry. I got lucky telling them to stick it.
>>62975390Fuuuuuuuuuuuck. Both my parents have horror stories about getting their wisdom teeth pulled. My mom had dry sockets and my dad's teeth were all fucky so they had to shatter them in his mouth while he was conscious but numb.
>>62975080Once upon a time I dated a girl who had a cocaine habit.She had some wisdom teeth out, but kept complaining about the pain.She was a happy after I pointed out that all she needed to do was rub some cocaine into those gums.
>>62975376Well, if there's something outright wrog with them, delaying will make it worse. Most of the stories I'd heard were about the teeth making you miserable until you *wanted* them out-- seriously, wisdom teeth are weird and the people who *don't* have to have them pulled are rare and lucky.I never felt so much as a twinge from mine, but X-rays showed them growing too close to major nerves, so we had them pulled before that could add a complication to it. One week of misery and I never have to worry about nerve damage or "can't even walk down stairs because the teeth make it too painful" again.However, some doctors do push unnecesary procedures, so do get a clear statement on what's up with yours before making a decision.
>>62975376For real, no joke, get it done. It only gets worse if you put it off, and there's no telling what BS is going to happen to insurance premiums in the next few years (if you're an Amerifag).Read reviews, find a good dentist, and remember that being a little scared is better than being really sorry.
>>62975436Yeah the percocet made me fucking loopy and gave me weird dreams. I got off that shit as fast as I could. Never touched narcotics since>>62975424Honestly just get it done anon. my bottom teeth were pretty badly impacted but I got lucky and they were able to get them out without any complications. I'm >>62975080 for the record, and that story is more normal than the horrorshows you hear. Source: my buddy is going through dental school right now.It helps that I'm a canuck and healthcare up here is pretty good in general
> mfw never grew wisdom teeth
>>62975503PURGE THE MUTANT
Yeah, when I had mine out the oral surgeon had to basically take a chisel to quarter the tooth and pull two of them out that way because they were so twisted into the jaw. Then he had to straddle my chest to pull out one of the others. Fourth one supposedly came out fine. Thankfully I was knocked out under general for the whole time.
>>62975503Lucky. I heard about one poor soul who grew six of 'em.(Three or two instead of four are also common.)Stories where they actually grow in cleanly as Nature intended-- I don't think I've ever heard one.
I still have my wisdom teeth, they flare up about twice a year. I use clove oil to numb them, antibiotics to reduce the swelling and cannibis and advil for the pain.
My wisdom teeth story is so:>We've administered the Anesthetic. Can you still feel anything?Yes.>Fuck it!AAARGH!
I keep my wisdom teeth in a little cup by my bed. I keep meaning to drill holes in them and make a necklace. Apparently, I said some hurtful shit to my GF while I was doped on Hydrocodone.Also, Shoggy, you're the best, it's always a pleasure to read your stuff, especially live!
>>62975376Well, I had mine out on the 22nd of December, and two days later I was mostly up and about, got cleared for solid food, and ate more at Christmas dinner than the rest of my family put together. Healed up really fast. Minimal pain. Oral surgeon told me two weeks after, that if he hadn't performed the operation himself, he would have sworn I'd never had it.
>>62975461>>62975489>>62975468From the x-rays they've shown me (and occasional pains) I have one tooth that's probably a problem and I guess if they're going in there for one they may as well say fuck it and take them all. I should bite the bullet and maybe try to get them pulled over christmas break.
>>62975615>The all guardsmen party give dental advice
>>62975560Still got 'em all and never had any problems. Mid-30's and hoping it stays that way.
>>62975634I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this anon, but you'll only stay in your mid 30's for a few years. After that its the late 30's, then early 40's, then mid 40's...
Today we learn not of the AGP but apparently of mankind's nemesis....wisdom teeth.
>>62975659It's in solidarity of Brother Shoggy and his struggleShoggydarity?
>>62975616Oh yeah, if any of them are causing you pain already, get 'em all out to be certain and get it over with. Wisdom tooth pains only get worse.
>>62975659Those who have had to have their wisdom teeth removed are genetically further along than those of us who fit them in our faces. A more evolved human for more agriculturally enriched times.
I would buy Shoggy a nice glass of whiskey ... if that wouldn't interact poorly with the pain killers.
>>62975714People who have kids after having cancer are genetically further along than the rest of us who just fucking die. A more evolved human for more medically enriched times.
I take massive shits, does that make me further evolved?
>>62975316You got to take a week off work? Lucky bastard. I had a standard issue 2-day weekend, followed by a week of 12 hr shifts because one of my co-workers decided to fuck off on vacation, and guess who was expected to make sure all the work still got done?
>>62974936Bitch I had all four out and I was feeling better in two weeks.
Did shoggy ded? Do you need to rest and post later man?
>>62975861Ah, I was still a teen and not working at the time, actually. Just had it done in the summer so it wouldn't interfere with school.Your employer was horrible about it... and 12-hour shifts!? After surgery that's SAFETY HAZARD territory.
Wisdom Teeth: Proof that God hates humanity and is quite petty about it!
People who use lightsabers are genetically further along than those who use blasters. A more elegant weapon for a more civilized time
>>62975942But if lightsabers are from the past and they died out as a result of a hostile populace then wouldn't that make them genetically inferior?
>>62975234>>62975906Shoggy needs to rest and post in about a month or two time. Man needs to heal.Shoggy Heal up man before you you tank!
>>62975826How many kurics on average?
>>62975923Just one more of the reasons god is a dick.
>>62976035Like a quarter Bono each
>>62975984Is that Hugh Laurie?
>>62975942The best fighting style is saber + blaster dual.Make them parry your saber, and shoot them in the leg. Done.
>>62976054So about 25,000 Yoko's.
>>62975234The Commander explained to the confused Clerk that they'd discontinued that program for cost reasons and starting fights was a common tactic to avoid getting chosen. The dark-skinned Legionnaire had a history of it, especially when it involved his subordinates. The Clerk digested this, and then said that sort of behavior sounded remarkably leader-like, the Commander grinned and agreed. Down in the mud, the Legionnaire started swearing, but quickly shut his mouth as the Commander leaned down and asked if he was refusing to volunteer for Inquisitorial service. The man shot a final, exasperated look at us as he was hauled off with the rest of the Inquisitorial volunteers and the Commander and Clerk finally left with the whole parade in tow.Any relief on our part evaporated as the old Commissar stalked forward again, and had his cadets haul us out of the mud. Instead of the expected whipping though, the man gave us a thoughtful look, asked why the Legionnaire would've bothered with us. When he didn't get an answer, the Commissar started flipping through our papers (briefly pausing at Sarge's name and rank to look up and ask "Really?") until his expression abruptly lit up with recognition.The Commissar looked Aimy up and down, and in the most self-satisfied voice we'd heard outside an Inquisitorial briefing, announced that a penal legion was no place for a lady like her, but fortunately the Commissariat would be happy do the Von Humpedings a little favor. Aimy's expression conveyed exactly what she thought of his "favor" and where he could shove it, but she still put it into words, just make sure. Unfortunately for the markswoman, it didn't turn out she had much say in the matter, and Cadet-Commissar Von Humpeding was marched off at gunpoint to get a shower and a fancy new hat, while a tech-priest and pair of servo-skulls were brought over to fit the rest of us for some less-fancy explosive collars. All in all, she probably got the worse deal.
>>62976104The most evolved and greatest fighting style is Dual Pistols and Powers sneak attack Force fucker from Kotor 2. Use the force to stun everyone in the room, then put lots of big holes in their brains.
>>62976223An unwilling Commissarial recruit?Oh yeah, THAT'S going to end well. The senior Commissar must have his head in the same place Aimy told him to put his "favor".
>>62976223Making a guess as to Oak's original plan: >The party was supposed to go with the volunteer group>Recruitment orders called for a specialist team with their specific description>Legionnaire was the contact that could get them out
>>62976293You'd think someone as smart as Oak would've learned by now.
>>62976257I always preferred the double-ass lightsaber in KOTOR2. Leaping at enemies over vast distances, putting the fear of the Force into them.
>>62976293and like most plans it did not survive contact with the party
>>62976293Oooh craaaap. Yep, I bet you've nailed it.>>62976311I'm not entirely convinced Oak is the Inquistion's best and brightest, actually.
>>62976325Fair enough, fair enough.
>>62976293Another option was that they were to get Sarge into a fight so he would get put in solitary confinement.
>>62976293Oak wasn't even subtle about it.
>>62976325If he was, he wouldn't be stuck with the guardsmen.
>>62976351*shrugs*"Honestly what did he expect, they're guardsmen not inquistorial agents and even they are off they're rocker.
>>62976351Of course he wasn't subtle - the Guardsmen wouldn't GET anything else.Not that it helped.
Random-ass prediction:Aimee is Rupert's kid.
>>62976528God i can imagine oaks face, or at least drink inducing reaction when he realizes that the obvious indicator for the guardsmen was missed and they have doomed the entire inquisition while they're at it.*slow clap*
>>62976223One bomb-collaring and servo-skull shave-job later (the part where they'd tattoo our foreheads would apparently wait until deployment), we were standing around wondering just what the hell had happened and if we should've done, well, anything about it. Our discussion on the subject was interrupted by someone behind us asking pretty much the same question. We turned around to find a group of four Legionnaires staring at us, Sarge began to say something, and then paused and stared back for a few confused seconds trying to place why the four bald guardsmen we were looking at seemed so familiar, until Twitch and one of the Legionnaires both pointed at eachother and shouted "It's YOU!" and the rest of us (sans Tink) abruptly recognized all four of them as former Trainees from our brief stint as Inquisitorial drill-sergeants. It was hard to say who was more surprised, we all just stared at eachother for a few seconds, and then the leader of the group, one of the ex-PDF troopers, laughed, saluted Sarge, and said he never dreamed Oak would send *us* to get them out and we'd better talk to the Interrogator right away. At least, as soon as they found him; he'd snuck off during the muster to do something or other at our end of the parade grounds. According to them, he looked sort of like Sarge but bigger, grumpier, and blacker... Had we seen him by any chance?
>>62976559GOD DAMMIT OAK, YOU DUMB SON OF A BITCH!
WHY IS OAK SO STUPID, WHY WHY IS HE STUPID I DONT UNDERSTAND AGGGHHHHHH
>>62976559Okay, I have to officially throw in the towel, wanted to get two or possibly more to wrap up the whole ground-laying part, but I've lost all coherence at this point.I'll see if I can't get back on here in the morning and get those last ones up, but that's more or less it until after thanksgiving.Sorry for the lack of any actual serious content, just wanted to get SOMETHING out instead of delaying again and moping around all weekend. Thanks for sticking with me, and I'll see if I can't get everything together for a serious posting next time.
... I dunno, I don't think the group actually managed to blunder something this obvious before.
>>62976559 "Overly complicated plan that was not properly explained to our heroic retards" continues to be the greatest antagonist, yet again. >>62976627Hope you feel better soon, and thanks for the great story.
>>62976627You never have anything to apologize for.Thank you, truly, for posting what you did.
Thank you Shoggy.
>>62976627Even this short session was a blast, Shoggy! Hope you feel better.
>>62976630Hey, in our defense we were actually having to do un-modified WP rolls not to fuck up, and that's sort of our dump stat. Also, the Aimy thing would've worked fine if he'd remembered to move Doc too.
Well, first time catching it live. Fine thing to see in action. On another note, I am betting someone is going to either die or be serious fucked with in this chapter. I'd bet a hundred thrones on it.
>>62976627For real man, thanks.
short, but at least I caught it live
>>62976627Thanks for taking the time to do this. It's appreciated. Hope you feel better
>>62976293>>62976559Hey, I was right!
Thread archived on suptg!
>>62976627Get better soon Shoggy!
>>62973827my first root canal was the first positive dental experience I ever had.
>>62974159dental implants, I'm in the process of getting those
Thanks for all your hard work even though you've been in a world of shit. Hopefully a fix pans out soon.
Sleep tight sweet Shoggy.
>>62972087God damnit, i was waiting and you never showed up on time, figured you pushed it back again.
>>62978822at least we are keeping it bumped in case he comes back when he wakes up.
>>62973312Happy birthday to Guardsmen?
>Send the guy who was put to get you out along with the penal legionOnly our Guardsmen. They are probably going to come up with a far-simpler, incredibly stupid solution that works though. Besides, if they really wanted to destroy this place, they'd put Nubby in charge of an offical position again. He'd probably end up purchasing several more unspaceworthy hulks for the Penal Legion to enjoy - half the battle will just be survivng the warp journey to the battlefeild they were supposed to die on.
>>62975565Damn, in my case the guy administered anesthetics, waited five minutes then poked at my gums and asked if i could feel it.I asked him if he had done something.For whatever reason my wisdom teeth removal was a rather pleasant experience.
>>62979653>For whatever reason my wisdom teeth removal was a rather pleasant experience.This was my experience as well, I mean I was overly drugged to the point to where I woke up 25 hours later at home with my mouth hurting worse than I had been punched in the face repeatedly. Eating anything other than chicken noodle soup applesauce and other soups and stuff brought me to tears. But overall it was good
>>62979685All they did to me was numb my gums, pull out the tooth and that was that, no after aches or anything.Is there something wrong with me?
>>62979709that is usually an indication that they didn't need to be pulled, or had not yet reached the stage when they should.Most dentists recommend pulling them as it can be an easy paycheck or a huge payday.
>>62979764Well, the other one was just coming out (which is why i had to wait about a month between it and the earlier pulled one).On the other hand the one they pulled earlier (and was as easy to pull out as this one) had started burrowing its way through my cheek, causing my cheek to get bloated with bacterial action that caused pain and led me to seek help from a dentist.That's also the way i found out i had wisdom teeth.
>>62979685I don't remember much after waking up but I am pretty sure I woke up ranting and cursing like a sailor after my wisdom teeth were removed. The only thing I am sure of is I vomited a lot of blood several times.
>>62976257Dual mando disintegrators, rapid shot, and master speed totally break the game
I came here for storytime, not dental hygiene advice
>>62980427/tg/ dental advice: Thin your Teeth
Oh man, finally caught one of these threads live
>>62972087Holy shit. I’ve never actually caught one of these threads. May The Emperor bless you for your work anon.
Horry SHIT!ANOTHER REASON TO LIVE
>>62981720Is Papa Nurgle’s unending love not reason enough anon?
I feel the happiness of a true Fanboy, I cannot think anything critical or bad, only Joy.
Found a live one, for the first time ever. Joy!
Bump for the bump god.
bump with OC. i am 99% sure this was done before but i decided to do it anywayskeep it up, shoggy, but don't feel pressured. i waited once, i can wait some more, no big.
Finally done with work for the day, gonna see if I can't get the three or so posts I was intending to get to last night done before the thread dies. I'll be going slow enough to answer questions if you got them, so long as their not teeth related.>>62984630That's awesome, saved.
>>62985497SHOGGY~~how're your teeth~~Your stories warm my heart.
>>62985593That should've stroked itself out
>>62976559The four trainees accepted the bad news about their Interrogator like true guardsmen; that is to say with a mixture of swearing, the exchange of a few packs of smokes and ration bars, and a smug "I told you so" from the former scum who'd apparently just won the running death-pool. Our pride in them was only tempered by the fact that the agent Oak had apparently sent to help us had just been hailed off to join some sort of Inquisitorial suicide squad. They took the news that we had no idea what they meant about "getting them out" and were there for something completely different with a similar amount of cynicism; the ex-scribe said it explained a lot, and suggested we get back to their barracks to finish the conversation. Doc asked if that was really wise, given how gossipy barracks life can be, but the trainees assured him it was okay: they had their very own building separate from the rest of the platoon, just them and their Commissar, who was "one of the good ones". Nubby and Twitch both pointed out that the only good Commissar was a dead one; the trainees agreed and said we'd understand when we met him. What they meant by that became clear when we entered the lovingly sandbagged and razor-wired prefab, and encountered a rotund red-coated man firmly ensconced in a filthy recliner. Judging by the snoring, the man probably wasn't dead, but judging by the thick carpet of liquor bottles on his side of the barracks, he was definitely working on it. The Scribe introduced him as Commissar Kelly, gave him a firm poke in the belly, and when he didn't respond, extracted a data-slate from the recesses of the chair and asked whether Sarge wanted to be put down as the new platoon lead or if one of them should do it. Nubby, Twitch, and the rest of us admitted that they were right about their Commissar.
>>62985628/tg/ doesn't do strikethough, just spoiler tags, or you can use a generator to get the special characters if you're really dedicated.I'm moderately jealous of the /qst/ text formatting options, but at least /tg/ doesn't have the archive formatting problems that come with those.
>>62985647Please, please tell me Commissar Kelly talks like Father Jack
>>62985647Glad to have you around again Shoggy.I just wish you all the best and hope that your legos get fixed sooner rather than later.
>>62985647>>62985647It commissar Kelly a Kelly’s heroes reference
>>62985908Well we already had one in form of Sarge going as Kelly and claling his merc company "Kelly's heroes".
>>62985908We eventually googled it and it's the name of the actor that plays >>62985647 We've informed Failer that he doesn't get points for using obscure tv and b-list celebrity names for NPCs on several occasions, but he keeps doing it.
I know that you get asked that every thread, but does your group have any plans to get together for playing? It'll be great to read some more about your adventures after the AGP ending
Shoggy is still alive?
>>62986241Work and family situations keep getting in the way. I'm really hoping we wind up doing the Shadowrun campaign Failer was talking about, but so far we've only been able to get together for boardgames or playing stuff online. It'd be easier if we were willing to just play over Discord, or start a campaign without the full group, but it just didn't feel right when we tried.>>62986790Sorta.
>>62986899How is sarge and the rest of the party doing? In real life I mean. We’ve grown so attached to the characters we wonder about their players
>>62986899SHOGGY THE UNDYING. THE BLESSED WORDSMITH OF THE FATHER OF PLAGUES AND SUFFERING.
>>62985647>>62986013>Shoggy hasn't seen Father TedFor shame.
>>62985647Once we'd been officially inducted into the platoon (with Sarge as lead), issued proper Guard fatigues and some disappointingly power-packless lasguns out of a stash behind the Commissar's chair, the trainees brought us up to speed.As it turned out, the four of them (one PDF trooper, scribe, cleric, and no-longer-ex-con), hadn't been scooped up as part of the whole Oak thing, they'd actually been enjoying Inquisitorial hospitality since before everything hit the fan. Their team had done alright on their first few missions after graduation, as had the other trainees as far as they knew, but a few months back they'd run into trouble. The PDF trooper explained that it'd all been because of our training, you see, while our advice about just shooting anyone stupid enough to mess with the blatantly evil eldritch artifacts had served them well, we probably hadn't meant that rule to include Interrogators. At least not when there were witnesses around… The good news was that thanks to that decision they'd mostly survived that encounter, and the Inquisition investigators had actually agreed with their decision. The bad news was that grunts shooting their superior officers is generally frowned upon, regardless of what organization your in, hence the penal legion.They'd been in there for the better part of two months, and since regiments were shipped out ever two or three months, that actually made them some of the camp's most senior inmates. They'd arrived at the arrangement with their pet Commissar and had been trying to figure out if there was a way to get themselves "forgotten" when the regiment shipped out, and then the Interrogator had turned up and started talking about how Oak wanted to help them escape. Not being chumps, they hadn't believed a word of it and told him as much, until the man finally admitted he needed their help for something and would arrange for one of Oak's allies to extract them all together afterwards.
>>62987322I've seen I think 10 episodes, not enough to know the actor names though. Definitely got the general reference, but needed google to figure out the pun.>>62986955He's adjusting to fatherhood fairly well, but doesn't get much time to play. I'm the only real basket case of the group, everyone else is doing fairly well, twitch's player actually finished his nuclear engineering masters a few months ago, which is pretty terrifying when you think about it. I've been playing wow off and on with Failer and Tink and Doc's players, and they all seem fine, if a tad butthurt over the whole diablo thing. I told them not to go.
>>62987414Going to officially call it quits there, I've got to take my meds and try to get some activity in if I want to actually get *some* sleep tonight.I'll check in once or twice more, but it's probably time for this thread to die. I'm going to provisionally aim for the 1st for the rest of the half chapter. Thanks for bearing with me guys.
>>62987575>twitch's player actually finished his nuclear engineering masters a few months agoOh lord, nuclear apocalypse imminent!
>>62987630Good night Shoggy, hope you feel better soon. Been holding off reading anything till the end. The waiting hurts.>>62987575So when can we expect nuclear winter?
>>62987630Have a good one, Shoggs. Try to feel better, we'll see you when you're well once again.
>>62987575>Disappointed with the Diablo trailerTo be fair, no one expected the brain dead clusterfuck those idiots put on stage. Out of touch and wanting to piss money down the drain is a understatement.
>>62973380... you're an idiot.
>>62972087Holy shit I made it to one of these glorious tales
>>62987727And got the honor of hitting the bump limit, once it's all over.
Put me in the screencap
>>62987727>>62987782Till next thread then.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHcunREYzNY
>>62987630Godspeed Shoggy, may your teeth be blessed by the Emperor himself.
Night Shoggy!All are immortalised in this thread now. I thought they were legends, and now we are all part of the legends!
>>62975556Well, I can honestly say mine did.
>>62987575>twitch's player actually finished his nuclear engineering masters a few months agooh my goodness>which is pretty terrifying when you think about it.Indeed! Though for me, it was more terrifying at first read and then hilariously apt.Thanks for posting all this, Shoggy!
>>62987575> twitch's player actually finished his nuclear engineering masters a few months agoIf he's anything like his character he'll either bring about a new revolution in nuclear engineering or the destruction of the planet... or at least a respectable chunk of it... but not for lack of trying. Godspeed.
>>62987414>Sarge's bootcamp saved the Imperium from stupidity>Get put in a Penal LegionTypical. You train a bunch of people with the sole purpose of sorting shit out, preferable from a long distance, good cover and with plenty of explosives, and this is the thanks you get.
>>62972087The time has come.I'm so excited my pedipalps are trembling!
>>62972271>and debating having my entire fucking jaw removedShit man, that sounds excruciating. I have an impacted wisdom tooth that at some point I just will have to get removed.I'm already full of dread.
>>62988210>Typical. You train a bunch of people with the sole purpose of sorting shit out, preferable from a long distance, good cover and with plenty of explosives, and this is the thanks you get.But... but fighting with any semblance of sense or rationale is against imperial combat doctrine.In fact I'd say it's practically heresy.
>>62988663We could always just call it a Radical-type idea and call it a day. At least then Puritan and Radical Inquisitors can argue about the merrits of using common sense vs touching the obviously eldrtich artefact to see what happens.I'm unsure which of the above is the Puritan side.
>>62990378>>62991032OH! it's not a game piece, just a display. still neat!Shoggy, I ain't been this excited for a threads on /tg/ since papa-n's Heretical Love. Thank you, good fa/tg/uy.
>>62988210I'm stealing this.