>Be guardsman>Have to be bossed around by metal giants bossed around by bigger metal giants.>Whatever they are kinda cool>Big guys rebel, everything goes to shit>The mechy weirdos rebel>Some weird demon things show up>Your cousin draws weird tatoos on his face and blabs about skulls and ruins dinner.>The biggest angsty giant attacks Terra.>Oh shit.jpg>Someone has to fuck him up, big daddy E goes to his ship to kick his ass.>Go along to watch alongside this giant angel dude>Oh shit thats a lot of man.>Oh shit that angels a lot of dead. Hopefully the Emperor can stop him>Emps not doing shit just crying.>Try to fight the giant on your own, maybe your las can give him skin cancer or something>Doesn't work.>Get fucked over so hard that you get retconned.This is a sequal thread, describe the fuckery of a guardsmen daily existence.
>>51891571Ollanius Pious was a bad motherfucker.
>be a guarsmen> fucking die
>>51891873>wasHe's still around. Don't pretend that he's not a perpetual.
>>51891571>retconnedOnly the official story told by the Imperium. The Guard still knows the truth,
>>51891973I liked it better when he was just a lowly guardsman holding the line against a being that could crush him with zero effort.
>>51891999Praise Saint Ollanius Pious!
>>51892105I liked it better when he was a Terminator.
>>51891571>Be the son of a son of a son of some pencil-pushing Munitorum wonk>Be walking to get the senpai's food rations>See poster>It's for the IG>Join the Guard, See the world>seems pretty cool. Sure beats being a pencil pusher>Enlist at my local recruiting station>Get shipped off world >months of training>Getting smoked by the DI>Having to learn how to keep my lasgun clean>The training camp is on a fucking mud-plane in butt-fuck nowhere>rain everywhere>so much rain>rain >rain>rain>thissucks.avi>Training finally ends>Yay finally some action>Nope>Get assigned to guard this fucking mudball>it' still raining>There's still mud>still fucking mud everywhereFUCKINGMAKEITSTOP>the rations are still shit>this isn't what I signed up for
>>51891571>Be a guardsman>Assigned to some outpost in the middle of Emperor-damned-nowhere>Why are there so many large bugs?>Number of bugs increases>OhsweetTerraonrollerskatesitsTyranids>Everyobe left and right omnomnomnomed>Where is the bugspray when you need it
So did anyone screen cap the last thread? Specifially the wonderful tale some phoneposting pleb was able to weave.
>>51891571Wouldn't he have been an Imperial Army Soldier at that point, since the Guard came after?
>>51895527I hope someone did, otherwise I can go back and do it. That thing was awesome
I hope writefriend follows us here.
>be hiver, decide to join the guard>get assigned to planetary defense>the actual guard never comes to pick us up since they were here recently>get assigned to some shitty lower hive patrol>get eviscerated by some fucked up underhive mutant thing at the ripe age of 26
>>51891571Horus looks like a normal human in a giant robot, proportions are shit.
>>51892105That's what he was, even if he's a perpetual. Perpetuals just don't die permanently. (Like the Emperor, or Vulcan.) They still feel pain, and in some cases, that makes everything worse for them, because they don't have the liberty of actually dying from shock or whatever. They have to actually experience all of the pain of being killed and mutilated.I'm also pretty sure that he's /always/ had that cross around his neck.
>>51895527>>51896487Here. I did a screen cap but it's a little shit if someone wants to A) split it up or B) Make a better screen cap they just go ahead first post should be >>51758589
>>51891973I don't like that, so I'm gonna choose not to count it as canon. It's stupid. The whole point of ollanius is that he's just a regular dude.