>Last time on The All Guardsmen Party:Spot the Wonder Drone flashed upwards, sliced through the crackling green shield surround the Daemonthrope, and slammed into the thing's underbelly. As Spot's psi-suppressor, er, penetrated the creature's hide, it let out a roar of unfathomable pain and fury, its shield vanished, and the daemonid minions around us collapsed into goo. We all cheered again and watched, the inky black tendrils holding the Daemonthrope aloft twisted, flickered, and then… reappeared. We stood there, waiting to see what would happen next, and then flinched when the Daemonthrope let out a roar and fired a bolt of green lightning at someone on the surface. Nubby swore, Twitch groaned, Fumbles started whimpering, and Tink asked if anyone could see what was happening to Spot. Doc remained calm though. The medic looked at the rest of us, and then in a stuffy voice (because he STILL had that damned scalpel in his face) said:>So… unless someone has a better plan, I say we shoot it until we're out of ammo, and then run away if that doesn't work.None of us did, of course, so we all gathered together, opened fire, and hoped like hell that the Daemonthrope didn't have much juice left in it. As we fired, we couldn't help but notice that only one person up on the surface was firing with us, and they weren't using a pulse weapon.Up on the surface, Sarge pulled the pin on the Astartes-sized krak grenade he'd "borrowed" and hoped like hell this was going to end better than the last time someone had tried it...
>>46864402FUCK FUCK YES I CAUGHT AGP LIVE!!!!
>>46864402Thanks be to Shoggy for giving us our fix of AGP!Been refreshing the tg page for 14 minutes straight waiting for this.
Yesss, caught it live.Shame I have to go to bed now, thank the Emperor for auto-update.
PRAISE THE EMPEROR, WE ARE LIVE!
>>46864402Fuck yeah! Storytime!
>>46864402I caught one live! Deus Vult!
>>46864402>If you're not sure what's going on, this is the conclusion of the first portion of The [REDACTED] Conspiracy. You can read the earlier bit, and all the other stuff here:http://www.theallguardsmenparty.com/redacted.html>Sorry am late, and will go slow as usual. >The lore dump at the end sort of sucks, so I may rework it a little on the fly. Expect 20-25 posts total for this thread.
>>46864402HAPPENING. LET'S GET TO IT.
I will never point out enough how much I love this series. You rock.
>>46864402always nice to catch it live
Following this thread with interest!
>>46864402It's time for this tired Guardsman to enjoy some rest and a good storytime. Praise be to you Based Shoggy.
Has anyone ever made the party in xcom before?
>>46864511I think you're missing the wraithbone shlong for Spot
>>46864402Aww yiss, 'ere we go
By the emperor its here
>>46864402The fight on the top of the facility had begun with the three Deathwatch marines charging forwards in an attempt to blitz the Daemonthrope. In the opinion of (possibly former) Interrogator Greg Sargent, this was a very stupid idea.It wasn't that blitzing a Zoanthrope was a bad idea in and of itself. In fact if you look them up in the Tactica, they're defined as "Psychic Artillery" and the preferred methods for dealing with them are generally the same as other varieties of artillery. Ideally you just call in an airstrike, or some (preferably longer ranged) artillery of your own, but if that's not an option then you're going to want to get in close where their big guns can't easily get at you. Of course the tricky part is not getting blown to little pieces while you close the distance, but the Tactica has some good recommendations there too: If you're a Brave Soldier of the Imperium, then you're supposed to just sprint across the killing field, firing wildly and relying on your faith in the Emperor to protect you. If, on the other hand, you're a cowardly dog not fit to wear the Emperor's uniform, then you'll want to make use of cover and sneak around the flanks while all the Brave Soldiers get themselves killed.So, given that Space Marines are the very definition of Brave Soldiers of the Imperium, (and were wearing enough power armor to survive that sort of foolishness) their choice of attack was tactically sound. Or it would have been, IF THEY WERE ACTUALLY FIGHTING A ZOANTHROPE.Seriously, it wasn't some frail, slow-moving creature that relied on distance and minions to protect it from harm. IT. WAS. A. DAEMONHOST. You know, those things that can turn frail little cultists into nigh-indestructible killing machines capable of tearing tanks apart with their bare hands? What the Marines thought they were going to accomplish by getting closer to it was a mystery, especially since it was currently flying fifteen meters over the top of a deep crater.
>>46864485>20-25 posts total for this threadShort and sweet, cool.> http://www.theallguardsmenparty.com/redacted.htmlAlternatively, there's http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/46600041 for those who want to see /tg/'s running commentary.Thanks for taking the time to write these up, Shoggy. Can't think of a better way to spend the last couple hours of my birthday.
Holy fuck, I really gotta sleep now (tomorrow I have a DnD game) but I'll read this as soon as I'm able.FOR THE EMPEROR, EVER ONWARDS!
>>46864679Hey, happy birthday, may it be filled with triumphant tales of the finest inquisitorial goons this side of Terra!
DAS IT MANG
>>46864679Happy birthday, anon.>>46864402Holy shit, I've caught one live. I've got a 13th Age game tomorrow, but it's not till seven. ONWARDS, FOR THE EMPRAH!(also, thanks for posting these, Shoggy, they're great)
>>46864622>>46864511Saved>>46864561Haven't had time to play the second one yet, so no.>>46864512God I hope they put out a campaign or custom game builder for that, my DM promised he'd put something together for the Occurrence Border if they do.>>46864679happy birfday
>>46864402I was looking fr something else but I guess this will have to do. YAY GUARDSMAN PARTY WOOOOOOO!!!!!!
>>46864402SHOGGY missed you
IT IS BETTER TO DIE FOR THE EMPEROR THAN TO LIVE FOR YOURSELF!The Party: "Um... how about living, so that we can, um, continue to serve the Emperor?"
PRAISE THE EMPRAH!I caught it live! This is the most related picture I have!
>>46864736My only hope is that these make their way to Tink. I've got some other shit in the works too, all inspired by reading the AGP.
>>46864568The feels when someone keeps reposting a pic I made.>>46864661Ahhh, so those boys have been studiously studying the Codex Retardes, eh?
I've got a hot bath, a bottle of Sherry and 2 kilos' worth of a giant mutant croissant stuffed with bacon.I'm ready for this.
>>46864736There is some sorta custom game mode in BFG:A already.By what i saw in the /tg/ thread, you apparently can set up how many and what kind of enemy ships there will be.
>>46864441>>46864699The Emperor gave us recaf for a reason, guys.>>46864720>>46864731>>46864736Thanks.>BFG Occurrence BorderPresumably long before it became the infested scrapheap I run cogboys through every Friday, unless a mod or something opens up the ability to melt the front end off.>>46864810It's a good pic, and I like it. Thanks for throwing it together.
>>46864679Happy birthday to you and Shakespeare both.
>>46864776Lady, you got wax in those swords you call ears? He clearly said FUCK MON-KEIGH.Get your armor off, woman! It's time to get DOWN up in here! I'll bring the Power Dildos.
>>46864810> Codex RetardesThe only Codex that matters!
>>46864884The one the Alfa Legion follows to the letter!!!
Thanks and Curses for preventing me from studying for my finals, Shoggy
>>46864661Despite the temptation, Sarge and Aimy didn't stand around critiquing the Marines' choice of tactics. This was partially because the situation was too serious to waste time being petty and unhelpful, but mostly they just figured the Daemonthrope would handle do it for them. The two of them slowly advanced behind the Marines, placing aimed shots into the growing number of daemon-tyranid hybrids pouring out of the hole in reality the Daemonthrope was tearing, and waiting to see what was going to happen.Surprisingly though, what happened was… nothing. The three Astartes charged in (well the Apothecary just jogged), spraying fire and fending off the odd daemonid, but the Daemonthrope just manifested a greenish-black shield and ignored them while it poured more and more juice into the widening warp-rift. Between shots, Sarge and Aimy snickered to themselves as the Marines reached the edge of the crater and then milled around trying to figure out how to respond to being dismissed as non-threats.Of course the Deathwatch Marines didn't waste too much time standing around. The trio of superhuman warriors drew upon all their centuries of tactical knowledge, and came to the conclusion that they should try shooting the big psychic bug HARDER. As Guardsmen, Sarge and Aimy wholeheartedly approved of this decision, and concentrated on keeping the smaller bugs in check while the Space Marines poured a ludicrous number of bolt rounds into the shield.Seriously, when I say ludicrous, I mean it. All three marines were firing their bolters on full-auto (the Heart-Marine was actually using his one handed while firing a Plasma Pistol with the other!), and they were reloading faster than seemed physically possible. How much ammo the marines had (or where in the Emperor's name they were keeping it all) was a bit of a mystery, but they Sarge and Aimy both swore that the trio managed to put upwards of two-hundred rounds into the Daemonthrope's shield before it popped.
>>46864881Even though I know it's Felicia Tayber from Death or Glory, that pic always reminds me of Melodi from A Fresh Start.
>>46864937Soldier not holding the line and doing his all to kill the foul enemies of man. Someone call the commissar!
>>46864972he's checking for burrowers.
>>46864972It's okay, battulbrothar. Mandatory briefings are a justified cause for unscheduled leave from one's post.
>>46864915You missspelled Imperial Fists there, buddy.
>>46864985I don't think he's going to find them by looking into the camera.
>>46864958It's the best sexy techpriestess I have a picture for that isn't outright lewd.Pity I don't have the ca$hmonie$ to commission a full-body nude of my covert coglass Factor...
>>46865026Its the camera that's looking into him.
>>46864985My mistake then. Carry on soldier and keep up the good work. The Imperium is lucky to have soldiers as vigilant as him
>>46864972They all look very unfazed for people about to be stomped by 'nids.>>46864679Joyeux anniversaire, anon.
>>46865026That's what they want you to think
>>46865053>They all look very unfazed for people about to be stomped by 'nids.Lo, there, do I see a field of men who have not between them one fuck to give.Lo, they do call to me, to take my place among them. To join them and the Emperor of Mankind in Valhalla, where the brave may fight forever.
>>46864939Now this is where the Deathwatch Marines learned the real difference between a Zoanthrope and the unholy creature we'd hauled across the galaxy. When their barrage broke down the Daemonthrope's shield, it didn't fall over dead or try to wriggle away. No, all that a dozen bolt-rounds to the center of mass managed to do was make the thing angry, and daemonhosts can get very, very angry.The only reason the Astartes weren't vaporized was their superhuman speed and the fact that, despite their initial choice of tactics, they DID have a bit of self-preservation instinct. When the Daemonthrope rounded on them, the three Marines scattered, barely avoiding a psychic tantrum that turned roughly fifty meters of facility roof into a warp-tainted mixture of rubble and molten slag. Sarge and Aimy watched the light show, noting the power of the attacks and the way bits of dead daemonid rose into the air to fill in the Daemonthrope's bolter-wounds, and congratulated themselves on their decision to stick to shooting the little bugs.Eventually though, the Daemonthrope's tantrum ended and the bug turned back to its now-shrinking portal. It seemed to go pensive for a few seconds, and then with a flap of its wings, the bug entered the portal and its oppressive psychic presence vanished. Sarge and Aimy stayed in their cover waiting to see what horrible thing would happen next, but after a solid minute of nothing, they went back to picking off the daemonids.A few minutes later the last of the bugs were dead, the Marines had clawed their way out of the rubble at the edge of the destroyed area, and everyone was gathered around the shrinking the warp-portal. As the hole finally disappeared with a little pop, Sarge sighed in relief, then froze as Grumpy-Marine said:>Hmm, more power than I expected, but far less courage. That was almost too easy. Aimy got as far as "YOU JUST HAD TO FUC-" before the nearby mountaintop exploded in green light.
>>46865039Tbh it's better than most of the 2lewd ones. The artist nailed Felicia's curves in all the right places, and dat mechadendrite. I keep expecting to find an edit of it depicting her after the top half of her head gets replaced with metal.
>>46865026There is a Lictor behind that camera.
>>46865120Astartes, Jinxing it since M30.
>>46865153>Salamanders>giving a fuck about the Codex>>46865120YOU JUST HAD TO FUCKING SAY ITgoddamn I hate the Templars sometimes
All Guardsmen Party Storytime is literally the only reason I'll give 40k the time of day anymore. Fucking 10/10.
>>46865120>>That was almost too easy.God-Emperor, why?
Fucking Black Templars. You're supposed to be the Anti-Psyker nutcases, and you still jinx it like that?!
>>46865120The green light was followed by the familiar psychic screeching and the appearance of a rift in reality large enough to peek over the top of the mountain. Sarge sighed and facepalmed, while Aimy decided it was time to boost morale via friendly insults, specifically ones targeted at the Grumpy-Marine and "whatever retarded chapter of retards spawned your retarded ass." The black-and-white Space Marine didn't seem to take these completely innocent comments very well, but before anything could come of it both Sarge and Aimy were yanked off their feet.The Apothecary and Heart-Marine tucked the two guardsmen under their arms like fussy children and began running up the mountain at a pace that could be described as "terrifying". Sarge, possibly because he was far less of an asshole, was carried facing forwards, which meant that he was able to watch as the mountaintop grew a layer of flesh-fungus and a tide of mutated gaunts poured over it. He briefly considered picking a few of the bugs off while the Apothecary ran, but gave up after an especially large jump jammed his carbine's scope halfway into his eye socket. Aimy just swore at the Heart-Marine and promised terrible vengeance for such undignified treatment.The ride ended when the first of the Daemonids came into range. Sarge was placed on a boulder with a good view of the bug-covered slope, Aimy was unceremoniously dumped onto the ground, and the three Deathwatch Marines began advancing towards the glowing mountaintop.
Shoggy, question. Was the GM using errata or non-errata DW rules for the marines?
>>46865120I have to say, I love the way space marines think and act in your works. Too many depictions of them go straight into power fantasy territory and portray their hardheadedness, isolationism and obsession with personal glory as a good thing.
>>46865280Looks like even Lamenters have a certain threshold for suicidal tendencies that they won't cross.
>>46865358well, one of them is a Lamenter...
>>46865335If they were firing boltguns on fullauto, it'd be core rules. Errata drops them from S/2/4 2d10+5 to S/3/- 1d10+9.
>>46865280>running toward the giant hole in realityFucking Space Marines
>>46865280>whatever retarded chapter of retards spawned your retarded assBased Aimy
>>46865393I thought the Lamenters' shtick was that reality hated them, not that they suffered realistic consequences of being arrogant assholes?
>>46865280Once again, it was a matter of Sarge and Aimy providing covering fire while keeping their heads down, but this time the rough terrain and large number of hostiles meant the Astartes' attack was more of a slog than a blitz. Not that the lack of speed made it any less impressive, these ARE the Emperor's Angels of Death we're talking about. All three of the Deathwatch Marines collected more kills that Sarge while simultaneously dealing with enemy attacks and climbing a bloody mountain. If it weren't for the fact that Aimy's sniping skills, not to mention her techno-heretical armament, managed to keep her in the lead on points, Sarge might've had to admit that honest Guardsmen couldn't compete with genetically engineered supersoldiers.Anyway, the advance to the top of the mountain went off with only two or three sketchy moments. The worst of which was when the Grumpy-Marine let himself get flanked by a bunch of mutated gaunts for some reason. I mean seriously, he just stood there like an idiot pawing at his belt, it was like he forgot how many grenades he had or something. Aimy had to pull off an absolutely amazing barrage of double-kills to keep his stupid ass bug-free. Aside from that, the time when one of the larger Daemonids almost managed to sneak up on Aimy before Sarge noticed it, and the incident with the looser-than-expected boulder, the advance to the mountaintop went smoothly. Of course, you know what Murphy says about attacks that go really well…
Fucking yes. Shoggy? I hope you know that it just makes my day when you post a thread like this. It really does. Not even sarcasm. Thanks!
>>46865494> it was like he forgot how many grenades he had or something ohhh nubby
>>46865335Not sure, aside from him basing them off Deathwatch in the name of making them feel more OP.>>46865532Glad to entertain.
>>46865493Exactly. Fate dicking them over at every opportunity has presumably forced them to learn caution.>>46865543>>46865544I don't know what you're talking about. Clearly they were stolen by daemonid Lictors; the Marine should really keep better track of his things around enemy combatants.
>>46865543>>46865544According to >46864402, it was Sarge what borrowed that pineapple.
>>46865562The errata'd profiles were intended as optional rules to speed things up by reducing the number of dice rolled. With you guys automating rolls, there'd be no advantage there, though the higher minimum damage does come into play sometimes.
>>46865562If any of them had a pre-errata heavy bolter with pre-errata RF rules, the daemonnid would be daemonded.
>>46865584nah Nubby swiped it when the Templar picked him up.They wasted it clearing a room with some weird lizard-robot called a Rak-gol or something like that.
>>46865632NOT A WASTE. RAK'GOL WARRANT IMMEDIATE APPLICATION OF ANY AND ALL MEANS OF DESTRUCTION.The whole belt might have been a bit excessive, but reducing the damned lizardbugcyborg to chunky salsa without a fight was a Good Call.
>>46865494WHO IS THE NUBBY YOU SPEAK OF AND ... WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY GRENADES FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUU
>>46865578Or Orks dressed as daemonid Lictors
YES! GOT IN LIVE!!!
>>46864402ALL HAIL THE GOD-KING OF /tg/!!!
>>46865750I played several 1st Ed. DH, and RT campaigns. Where the hell is that from, and all I can say is melta it from a distance.
Got my homemade burritos and I'm ready for some All Guardsmen Party.
>>46865494Okay, well, technically what happened wasn't an ambush, so maybe the old adage isn't perfect, but the end result was about the same.The top of the mountain was a smallish plateau with a bunch of sciency antennas on it, plus a growing rift in reality and an irritable Daemonthrope. The three Deathwatch Marines advanced right up to the edge of it, cleared out a last wave of gaunts, and then all three prepped grenades and vaulted up over the lip of the plateau. Neither Sarge or Aimy could see what happened next, but at least one of the grenades must have stuck its target, because the Daemonthrope let out a mind-rending screech of pain. Unfortunately, it also let out a blinding blast of green energy which shook the entire mountain, guardsmen included, like an abusive nanny.Sarge wound up lying on his back, blinking and trying to remember what he'd been doing, and then flinched as something large flew a few meters over his head. He reflexively turned and watched as the object sailed a few dozen more meters, clipped a boulder, cartwheeled up in a short arc, landed with a crunching sound, and finally skidded to a halt. Sarge blinked again and idly wondered why the unidentified crashing object looked so familiar. Then his dazed brain kicked back into gear, put two and two together, got five, decided that was close enough, and signaled his mouth.>HOLY SHIT IT'S RAINING SPACE MARINES!Aimy, who was even more out of it than Sarge, moaned and crawled into cover underneath a nearby boulder. Not because she understood a single word of what Sarge had said, but because taking cover was the Guard-issued response to confusion and incoherent orders. She huddled there for a second, clutching her head and wondering why she'd ever left her regiment, and then registered what Sarge had said at about the same time as the dazed noncom realized it himself. Both of them jumped to their feet and ran downhill towards the crumpled form of the Marine formerly known as Grumpy.
>Its 3:30 in the morning here>I should go to bed>Currently contemplating if i want to sleep the whole next day and stay a while longer or if i should just read all of this in the morening
>>46865991Fuck sleep, you've got a live thread by the best writefag of modernity!
>>46866042But my eyelids are in full insubordination and i think the last commissar inside my brains just got nommed by a sleepynid.
>>46865991Sucks to be you!! Its 10:30 am here.
>>46866069As was said in >>46864850, that's what recaf is for.
>>46864429nigga i've been refreshing /tg/ catalogue every day for the past 2 weeks
>>46866115I will let you in on a little secret.I hate that stuff. I dont drink it, i am not planning on drinking it and i am neither going to form a habit of drinking it. Last time i drank it was to honor my grandmothers 80th birthday earlier this year. The taste of that cupful is yet to fully immaterialize.
>>46866146Go to: http://www.theallguardsmenparty.com/ if you look in the blue box at the top of the screen Shoggy posts the time he'll start his story telling 24 hours before it's supposed to happen.
For those in need of sleep, just remember the thread will still be here in the morning. You'll be able to enjoy the fullness of storytime.Yes, you don't get to engage in the banter and "Mother of god" at each Shoggy post, but really, it's the story you want, and if you are lulling about in a stupor, you won't be able to enjoy it fully. Go to bed, knowing that the first thing to greet you in the morning will be more glorious Shoggy story time.
>>46866180Tea, then. Or caffeinated chewing gum. I hate coffee too.
>>46866180Try green tea. It's what I do to get my caffeine fix.
>>46866247It's too late to get the water boiling, neither have i even tasted tea so im not sure what i would be getting myself into and all stores are closed now.>>46866241Funny, i feel like im getting more out of this story time atm, because i feel like how sarge is described to be feeling.
>>46866247I don't know. I was never big on it my self, and the only things I'd ever buy from places like starbucks were those 90%sugar, milk frappacinos, but i've been drinking coffee lately for work and i don't really mind the taste as much. It's one of those things where it can become a whole lot easier to take down with practice. Also try Macha, that shit is pure energy
>>46866247Hell, most soft drinks will give you enough caffeine to postpone falling asleep for a couple hours
>>46866335I feel sorry for Americans, unable to know the true joys of a good cup of coffee.
>>46866314What about just throwing some cold water on your face?
>>46866335It's an acquired taste. I just don't want to acquire it.Tea, Earl Grey, Hot is superior in every way to workplace coffee, and it's not even the best tea.
Aww hell, i gotta call it quits now.Going off to bed, hopefully i can slay some heretical pink elephants on a cloud island in my sleep.Good luck to you all.Leaving some music behind.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfERIz6FkbM
>>46866393We have real coffee, you just have to look for it.
>>46866393American here, been drinking it black every morning for 6 years now. Grind the beans myself, French Press, Drip, Aeropress, you name it I've made it. I take my coffee seriously.
>>46865984Actually the "former" was premature, when Sarge reached the battered Marine he was still breathing and in possession of over three quarters of his appendages. It was hard to say whether the missing foot was due to the blast, the fall, or the pack of daemonic rippers that had started gnawing at the Astartes while Sarge was staggering around, but it's not like it really mattered. After some initial clearing, Aimy began picking off all nearby bugs, while Sarge propped the wounded Space Marine up against a cover-providing rock and tried to decide what to do next. His thought process was interrupted when the rock exploded.For the second time in five minutes, Sarge found himself on his ass, wondering what the hell was going on. This time though, the sight of the Daemonthrope drifting down the mountainside shook him out of it. He staggered upright and analyzed his current situation with the speed of the truly desperate. It was a complex tactical situation. Sarge was bleeding, slightly burned, and had at least one broken rib. The Space Marine was still unconscious, and was now slightly less than three-quarters-intact. Both of them had been flung a few meters down the scree slope, and were now at the top of a twenty-ish meter cliff. Friendlies-wise, Aimy wasn't anywhere to be seen, and neither were the other Deathwatch Marines. As for hostiles, all the little bugs in the area were dead, but the Daemonthrope appeared to focused on the wounded Marine, and was gathering greenish-black electricity for another attack. Finally, the only option for cover was a smallish pile of rocks a few meters away, which was way too far to drag a tonne of power-armored Space Marine.It was a tricky situation. In fact it was the sort of tactical problem that a tribunal senior Inquisitors might spend an entire day and a half arguing over...Sarge didn't have that sort of time though, so he responded to the complex tactical situation by pushing the Space Marine off the cliff.
>>46866443Ok, i read this one and hten head to sleep.
>>46866398obviously the best tea is real chai
>>46866473>>46866473Goodnight, bed marine. Dream well if the Emperor.
>>46866443> ... he responded to the complex tactical situation by pushing the Space Marine off the cliff.Good lesson for life: always pick uncertain death over certain death.
>>46866501I shall slay all heretical dreams my friend, i shall conquer the slumberland in the name of the emperor.
>>46865494Did the other players get to run the Marines during this sequence, or were they all GM NPCs?
>>46866443Its not like he'll die from being pushed off a cliff, he'll die from the horrific injury's the Daemonthrope gave him.
>>46866443>so he responded to the complex tactical situation by pushing the Space Marine off the cliff.Oh look Daemonthrope, a distraction!
>>46866443>Sarge propped the wounded Space Marine up against a cover-providing rockIt's things like this that make me realize why getting smacked by Sarge tends ro daze the smack-ee.
>>46866443>Sarge didn't have that sort of time though, so he responded to the complex tactical situation by pushing the Space Marine off the cliff.God damn Sarge, you are the only man fit lead any unit of the Imperial Guard at this point, THE ONLY. GODDAMNED. ONE.
>>46866443>The Space Marine was still unconscious, and was now slightly less than three-quarters-intact.looks like gravis will have a roomieall traumatically amputated spacemarines party when?
>>46866443Despite the apparent retardation of this plan, it worked. The wounded Space Marine flopped over the edge a bare second before the Daemonthrope's attack hit. Instead of being blown to pieces by a bolt of green lightning, the wounded Space Marine merely suffered a bone-shattering fall and downhill tumble. This was unquestionably a win, unfortunately Sarge wasn't in much condition to appreciate it, because it'd taken him just a little too long to shove the heavy Marine over the edge.The blast caught Sarge in the back as he scrambled for cover, inflicting a few more shrapnel wounds and superficial burns in addition to knocking him prone. He struggled back to his feet as the Daemonthope screeched in rage and, deprived of its original target, turned its metal-covered face towards Sarge. The dazed noncom attempted to stagger the rest of the way into cover, realized he'd never make it in time, and raised his carbine instead. He got off only three shots before the Daemonthrope's eyes flared. An invisible force ripped the gun up and out of Sarge's hands, and then began inexorably pressing in on him from all directions…It was at this point that Aimy decided it was time to stop sitting around waiting for the Marines to show up, and do something heroic. Over the last minute or two she'd picked herself up from where she'd been thrown, found a nice firing position, and watched the Daemonthrope's attack in a desperate attempt to discover some sort of weakness. Unfortunately, it seemed to lack any giant glowing weak points, and while it had initially sported some nasty-looking wounds on its front, he remains of several daemonids had risen up and filled in the holes in thoroughly disgusting fashion. So, lacking any ideas for how to kill a continuously regenerating creature that shrugged off bolt-rounds and grenades, she settled for shooting it in the eye and hoping it was easily distracted.
>>46866552This was interspersed with the other content to fend off boredom, I just didn't feel like switching back and forth constantly while writing it.
>>46866666>I never get quints like thatWhy live?
>>46866727Good plan - GO AIMY
Dammit Shoggy, why do you always do these while I'm at work?!
>>46866783To read glorious AGP storytime.>>46866727When in doubt, GO FOR THE EYES.
>>46866783>Why live?In the name of glory, and the Emperor, of course.
>>46866727>she settled for shooting it in the eyewait what about piece of hull wrapped around the head
>>46866727The Daemonthrope screeched and released Sarge as the pulse-round punched through the metal plate welded to its face and put out its left eye. It then turned towards Aimy and then turned and caught a shot in its other eye. As Aimy had suspected neither shot did much to incapacitate the creature, but they sure as hell pissed it off.The rock that the Markswoman had fired from exploded in a shower of semi-molten shrapnel, but by that point she'd already rebased. Aimy popped up from her new position, landed yet another headshot, and then scrambled backwards over a ridge of scree, where she paused for a second before picking out another good-looking rock. She scrambled downhill, keeping the small ridge between her and the enemy, until she reached the rock, where she readied her rifle for another shot. It was then, as Aimy rose up for her third attack, that she realized it'd had been really, really stupid to assume the Daemonthrope would keep hovering around a few meters above ground level while it chased her. Aimy peeked out of cover to find the Daemonthrope a mere thirty meters above and in front of her, and with a corona of green electricity already gathered around it. The Markswoman reflexively flinched downwards, but it was already too late. There was a flash of green light, a blast of heat, and then… nothing.Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of silence and darkness, there came the horribly, horribly familiar pain.A couple hundred meters away, Sarge paused his search for his dropped carbine, and listened in confusion to what sounded like the bellowing of a stuck Grox. Then after a few seconds the incoherent screaming transitioned into a wail of: "WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE FUCKING FACE". Sarge gave up the search for his weapon, drew his laspistol, and started sprinting.
>>46866727Aimy and Sarge ship = best ship
>>46866839Fun fact, it didn't actually have eyes until it got possessed and started manifesting them as a glowy spot on the face-shield.
>>46866841>"WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE FUCKING FACE"Poor Aimy :(
>>46866839Its glowing eyes manifested through the metal.Fuckin' Daemonhosts, man.
>>46864939>Lamenter brought a plasma pistolHe must be the luckiest marine in his Chapter but that's not saying much considering his current position.
>>46866854Incorrect, the only love purer than the Emperor's is that of Doc and the Hospitaller.
>>46866841Awesome pic. Gawd she looks pissed.
>>46866825Chris, don't you have a shift to run???
You know, I think we've reached the point where even some Commisars would retreat. Thats saying something.
>>46866841Well, it pissed off the sniper. That had to do something right?
>>46866978I'd look pissed too if I had a hairstyle like that.
>>46864561I made the party in Wasteland 2.
>>46867022>implying retreating would help with anything against a demonhostyou'd just die tired
>>46867141And moderately later than everybody else
>>46867141>>46867172Which, when you think about it, would be even worse, because then the Daemonhost can take it's time with you, unlike the others grunts.
>>46866841Fortunately, Sarge didn't get a chance to try attacking a daemonically possessed Tyranid psyker with nothing but a laspistol and his guard-issue adamantium balls. I mean, I'm totally sure it would've worked out, but the sheer awesomeness of his inevitable victory probably would've caused the universe to implode or something. So all in all, it was a very good thing that he only got three steps before the Deathwatch Marines finally returned from whatever tea party they'd been having.Bolter fire erupted from somewhere lower down the mountain, and while it wasn't as perfectly-aimed as Aimy's shots had been, it was still enough to convince the big bug it had better things to do than finish off a slightly-overcooked guardswoman. Not having anything to prove to anyone, Sarge hunkered down behind a rock until the Daemonthrope had finished screeching in rage and launched itself towards the source of the fire, and then followed the sound of incoherent cursing (and also the smell of burned hair) to his markswoman.It turned out that Sarge was actually the second person to reach Aimy: he arrived to find the Apothecary crouched over the still-smoldering markswoman, spraying her head with what could have either been syth-skin or fire-suppressant. Whatever it was though, judging by the way Aimy was squirming and swearing even louder, it stung like a sonofabitch. Anyway, as Sarge arrived the Apothecary tucked Aimy under his arm (Sarge thought he remembered the Marine having two of those earlier, but wasn't quite sure) and turned to face him. The Marine started to bellow some sort of order, then paused and gave Sarge a look which managed to convey "Are you retarded?" despite being delivered through a helmet.>Where is your weapon, Guardsman?Sarge blinked, tried to think up a diplomatic response, and then decided that he was too sore and tired for this shit.>Dunno, where is your arm, Marine?
>>46867255>Dunno, where is your arm, Marine?1d5 E Flame
>Dunno, where is your arm, Marine?Adamantine balls aren't tough enough for him, we need some neutronium to backtalk a deathwatch marine after being blown up half a dozen times in the last few minutes
>>46867255>Dunno, where is your arm, Marine?
>>46867326Test Ag at -20 or be ignited
>>46867255>Dunno, where is your arm, Marine?Jesus Sarge
>The Marine started to bellow some sort of order, then paused and gave Sarge a look which managed to convey "Are you retarded?" despite being delivered through a helmet.I see this Apothecary has already had waaayyy too much experience with the Squad, despite just meeting them.
>>46867255Sides are in space
>>46866953Is it just me, or does that picture look like the daemonthrope is forcing the Inquisitor's head up his ass?Because I can't remove that mental image now.
>>46867456That's what I got out of it too.A good first step in wadding a man into a small, mulchy ball.
>>46867456>Implying the inquisitor's head wasn't already up his ass.
>>46867456>the Inquisitor's head up his assAt least it's accurate now
>>46867255After a VERY awkward silence the Apothecary sighed and began explaining the tactical situation.In short, Jim had commed the Marines (ours were still jammed) and informed them the AA guns would be coming online soon. Heart-Marine was distracting the Daemonthrope and drawing it into a good position for all the guns to hit it, while the Apothecary was trying to get him some reinforcements. Unfortunately, the Apothecary had been disarmed (heh) and running on stimms, Grumpy-Marine's diagnostic cogitator was reporting massive trauma and something like fifty broken bones, and Aimy had been temporarily blinded. So Sarge was all there was and he'd LOST HIS BLOODY GUN.Anyway, there was a bit of yelling, a bit of negotiation, a futile search for wherever Aimy had dropped her weapon, and just maybe a small amount of theft. In the end, Sarge left Aimy and the incredibly battered Grumpy-Marine to the Apothecary, and ran down the mountainside armed with a far-too-large bolter, and an oversized krak-grenade.As Sarge quickly descended back down to the facility (and desperately tried to avoid faceplanting as he did so) the Heart-Marine was playing hide-and-shoot with the increasingly frustrated Daemonthrope. Sarge couldn't see much of the Marine, who was wildly dodging through the roof-top structures, but it was impossible to miss the lightning blasts, large-scale psychokinetic tantrums, and the occasional more daemonic attack that he was dodging. All-in-all, it looked like an absolutely suicidal fight to get involved in, especially given how poorly Sarge's own attempt to do that sort of thing had gone (his back was absolutely killing him). Still though, Sarge had to do something to help, so when he finally reached the facility's rooftop, he propped the oversized bolter up on a chest-high pipe like it was a heavy stubber.Sarge planned out his escape path, took careful aim, fired… and completely missed.By, like, thirty meters. It was pathetic.
>>46866909>Fun fact, it didn't actually have eyes until it got possessed and started manifesting them as a glowy spot on the face-shield.
>>46867255Did your GM give XP for comments like that?
>In the end, Sarge ran down the mountainside armed with a far-too-large bolter, Hoo boy. Somebody's about to get a broken shoulder or a scope-slap to the face.
Nice. I just wanted to got to bed...Ah fuck it. AGP it is!
>>46867867We're about halfway done, mate - 12 of approx. 25 posts in. Soon there will be time to sleep.
>>46867528In what would've been the most humiliating experience in his life if anyone else had been around to see it, Sarge proceeded to miss two more carefully aimed shots before giving up. He then switched the bolter over to automatic, and attempted to lay down some "ork-style" suppressive fire. The gun, which had doubtlessly been forged by some master artisan and performed flawlessly in centuries of combat, jammed on the second shot.Swearing like only a noncom can, Sarge picked up the jammed bolter and threw it at the Daemonthrope. The heavy gun sailed a good ten meters below the Daemonthrope, and then bounced off a pipe and over the edge of the roof. When asked what happened to the bolter afterwards, Sarge told the Apothecary that the Daemonthrope had used its telekinetic powers to snatch it from his grip. (He didn't become aware that the rooftop's vid recorders had caught the whole shameful show, including his blatant lie, until far, far later.)After spending a second cursing the stupidity of what he'd just done, Sarge drew his laspistol and finally scored a hit on the Daemonthrope. Unfortunately, laspistols aren't known for their ability to pierce daemonically-reinforced chitin, and the creature just ignored the pitiful attack as it continued trying to kill the Heart-Marine. Sarge swore some more, tried to draw a bead on one of the warp-fire filled eyeholes that Aimy had punched in the Daeomonthrope's faceplate, and then nearly had a heart attack as twenty-four anti-air guns opened fire from every direction.
>>46867982Whats up with that image?Are you implying that the members of the AGP are not touched by the emperor and living saints who shall rise again from death
>>46868025fucking glory hound techpriests
>>46868025>When asked what happened to the bolter afterwards, Sarge told the Apothecary that the Daemonthrope had used its telekinetic powers to snatch it from his grip. (He didn't become aware that the rooftop's vid recorders had caught the whole shameful show, including his blatant lie, until far, far later.)
>>46868067If Nubby really had been touched by the Emperor it would have been with a really big stick in the face several times
>>46868025BIG GUNS NEVER TIRE
These are the best.Thank you Shoggy!
>>46868025>twenty-four anti-air guns opened fire from every direction.>every directionNow, I'm no tech-priest, and I'm sure Jim and his cohorts were under a great deal of stress, but I'm also pretty sure that MOST OF THOSE ARE GOING TO MISS. How in the fuck do you not get a nigh on perfect targeting solution on a monster made of HERESY, SUPER HERESY, MIND-RAPE, GROSS SHIT, AND A DECKPLATE? Emprah fucking dammit guys!
>>46868256if it comes up with any kind of error message in the targeting data, you shoot that location
>>46868256What are you talking about? The AA guns form a perimeter around the mountain base the Demonthrope is currently in. Off course they're firing from every direction.Unless you read that as "AA guns firing IN every direction"
>>46868256iirc they're a network of Hydra Flak Cannons surrounding the landing pad. So we'll see what punches through and hits it - anti-air guns should do a number on a Monstrous Creature, even a possessed one.
>>46866841Great, now I've got a new waifu...>AS IF MY MENTAL LANDSCAPE WASN'T CLUTTERED ENOUGH!!!
>>46867528Goddamnit, Nubby, Sarge is supposed to be a good influence on you, you're not supposed to be a bad influence on him!>>46868025>Swearing like only a noncom can, Sarge picked up the jammed bolter and threw it at the Daemonthrope. The heavy gun sailed a good ten meters below the Daemonthrope, and then bounced off a pipe and over the edge of the roof. When asked what happened to the bolter afterwards, Sarge told the Apothecary that the Daemonthrope had used its telekinetic powers to snatch it from his grip. (He didn't become aware that the rooftop's vid recorders had caught the whole shameful show, including his blatant lie, until far, far later.)Daamn Sarge, you done fucked up. Notwithstanding the fact that the Marine probably would have done the same if it had jammed on him...
Got one live. I liked the implication earlier that the marines are the Deathwatch equivilent of the Guardsman Party, going through Inquisitors the way the Guardsman went through Interrogators.
>>46868354>All Deathwatch PartyJesus what would they have to deal with on a regular basis to have as shit luck as Sarge and company?
>>46868354lol. didn't think about that, but now that you mention it, it fits.
>>46868383>Jesus what would they have to deal with on a regular basis to have as shit luck as Sarge and company?They'd be assigned to the Occurrence Border, of course.
>>46868354I'm terrified of any marine who behaves anything like Nubby or Twitch
>>46868025Sadly, the hail of flak didn't immediately reduce the Deamonthrope to an airborne pile of daemonically-tainted chunky salsa. The creature took several hits, enough to kill anything that could really be called "alive" in the first place, but before was overwhelmed it managed to furl its wings into a sort of shield and drop into the mouth of the crater it'd originally exited the facility from. It didn't drop all the way down the crater though: once out of the AA turrets' line of sight, it spread its wings again and began regenerating its wounds.Sarge swore at the creature's refusal to just die already, but noticed that it was lot more trouble healing itself than it had previously. He wasn't sure whether it was the lack of nearby Daemonids to cannibalize (the corpses had dissipated after the warp-rift had closed), or if the creature was FINALLY running out of juice, but either way it's regeneration was going slower. Unfortunately, it appeared to be countering for this difficulty by getting even more daemony: some of the wounds were filling in with eyeballs and tentacles instead of chiton, and the local area was getting awfully warpy.As Sarge moved closer to the crater, in the vague hope that the shorter range would let him use his laspistol or grenade effectively, he crossed through patches of rapidly-growing mutated plants, chittering whispers, frost, and other lesser phenomena. Of course compared to the stuff he'd seen during the warp-voyage with the Daemonthrope, these phenomena were positively mundane. He soldiered through them without any problems more significant than one of the little biting bugs that the Daemonthrope loved so much getting partway up his pant leg before he squished it. Still though, it slowed him down a bit, which meant that only the Heart-Marine was there to keep pressure on the bug while it healed up.Luckily, the Marine as a big boy who could handle himself, and only suffered a few non-fatal injuries during his wait.
>>46868383They had a Lamenter. They already had terrible luck.
>>46868333hands off muh waifu
>>46868383Imagine if all Twitch's theories were true, something like that. except you might want to replace orks with word bearers or Alpha legion or something
>>46868416>Marine that behaves like Nubby
>>46867561I would, and my group routinely does, because awesomeness deserves to be rewarded.
>>46868428Forgot your name, Shoggs.
>>46868416Given the Black Templar anti-psyker tendencies, he's probably their Twitch - always blaming it on the psykers. Obviously, the Apothecary is the unholy mix of Sarge and Doc, and is just about fucking done with the hijinks that the rest of his Kill-Team gets up to.
>>46868416>NubbyBlood Ravens have the thieving down.
>>46868452that image needs Custodes armour
>>46868155I'm mean the Emps made the Word Bearers kneel from sectors away, he probably lightly brushed nubby with his might, and then took a very long thorough psyker shower to clean nubby's nubbyness off.
>>46868452You know this kind of makes perfect sense.>>46868464Who's Heart marine. Amy?
>>46868433that's a distressingly good point.Poor bastards.
>>46868504Heart Marine is an unnamed Lamenter Deathwatch member. They are all identified by whatever Chapter symbol they have.
>>46868346Nubby is like an orc. You can do you're damnedest to contain him, but in the end he'll get his nubby hands on everything, he's nubby spores/filth in everything, and his nubby influence over everything
>>46868428So Sarge finally pushed through the last phenomena (a patch of snow and ice that was actually quite refreshing compared to the local scorching temperature) at about the point when Tink finished booting up Spot. He watched with same sense of triumph, then disappointment that the rest of us felt when the Wraithbone-armed drone impaled the Daemonthrope and the thing STILL DIDN'T DIE. Just like the rest of us he (and the Heart-Marine) decided the only thing to do was keep attacking and hope that Spot was weakening the bug enough for regular weapons to finish the job. Sarge put his laspistol away, spent a good few seconds gauging the distance to the Daemonthrope and the weight of the Astartes-sized krak grenade, and then threw the explosive at the bug's back while it launched one if its green lightning bolts. The grenade flew in a perfect arc, hit the Daemothrope right between the base of its wings, failed to adhere properly, and dropped off...Fortunately, especially for those of us standing UNDER the Daemonthrope and the grenade, Sarge had let the krak cook a little. It exploded about half a meter under the creature, and pretty much the entire lower quarter of the thing, plus a good chunk of its back, was instantly removed. It writhed in the air, spraying ichor and screeching, and for a second we all thought that between the blast and the small arms fire, we'd finally done it. Then we noticed the damage to Spot.
>>46868536Yeah, but they're debating which Marines are analogues to which Guardsmen.
>>46868500>and then took a very long thorough psyker shower to clean nubby's nubbyness off.>yfw the Emperor is still washing off the taint of Nubby with a thousand psykers every day
>>46868536Yeah I know, that's why I was asking if Heart marine is the Amy of the Deathwatch due to being a Lamentor.
>>46868548>Then we noticed the damage to Spot.NOOOOOOOOO
>>46868548sounds like his ballistic skill roll failed by <5
>>46868458I swear, every time I go to shitpost I forget to put it back on...
>>46868548Aw dude, teamkilling Spot? Not cool man
>>46864402So when is Winds of Winter coming out?
>>46868544>orc>you'reC'mon anon>>46868548>Then we noticed the damage to Spot....uh oh.>>46868568Nah, he's too nice.
>>46868568Lamenter is the Tech Priests and fumbles, The long suffering allies who are probably to blame for all this mess
>>46868548RIP Spot>Plays "Nearer, my god, to thee"Wait...what's holding the Wraithbone dong of doom in the Daemonthrope of Spot is-OH EMPRAH NO!!!
>>46868548Down in the facility, Tink swore as Spot reported severe damage to its hover-unit. He desperately tried to use the drone's little manipulator-arm to grab the something, but wasn't fast enough. The drone sank away from where it had been pressed into the Daemonthrope's underbelly, until it was hanging by the, er, spearhead at the end of the Wraithbone psi-suppressor.Sarge watched in alarm as the Daemonthrope's wings flared larger. Lacking any more useful ideas, he began firing his laspistol as fast as possible while screaming at the Heart-Marine on the opposite side of the crater to kill the thing before the drone fell off. The Astartes responded to these unhelpful instructions by pausing for a second, and then lowering his bolter. Seeing this, Sarge began to scream something impolite, but paused himself as the Space Marine suddenly exploded into a full sprint towards the Daemonthrope.The yellow-shouldered Deathwatch Marine charged forward, simply ignoring a lightning blast which ripped a large chunk out of his side. He reached the edge of the crater where, with an echoing shout of "WE DIE IN GLORY!", he jumped and hit the Daemonthrope with a literal flying tackle. Then, with one arm and both legs wrapped around the creature, he reached down, ripped Spot loose, and then slammed the Tau drone spike-first into the Daemonthrope's metal-covered face. Repeatedly.Now THAT was a sight to give us pause. I mean, who wakes up in the morning expecting to see a Space Marine beat a daemon-possessed Tyranid psyker over the head with a Tau drone and a Wraithbone marital aid? Seriously, it was single weirdest thing we'd ever seen, and believe you me, that is REALLY saying something.
>>46868884Give that man an Iron Halo.
>>46868884pic definitely related
>>46868884>he reached down, ripped Spot loose, and then slammed the Tau drone spike-first into the Daemonthrope's metal-covered face. Repeatedly.
>>46868884Fuck yeah, Lamenters!
>>46868884The Lamenters are awesome.
>>46868884>WE DIE IN GLORY!>a Space Marine beat a daemon-possessed Tyranid psyker over the head with a Tau drone and a Wraithbone marital aid
>>46868884In the name of Malikim Pharos. FOR THOSE WE CHERISH WE DIE IN GLORY
>>46868884>RepeatedlyBy the God-Emperor, give that Astartes a Successor Chapter
>>46868884FOR THOSE WE CHERISH WE DIE IN GLORY
>>46868884Hey, Shoggy, how much more will you be posting tonight?
>>46869011>Implying there are ever enough Lamenters around to even get them to full strength for more than a day
Love Marines confirmed best marines
Holy hell he's pulling a cutter! Except with a wraithboner instead of chainsword-chan!
>>46868884Hm, did you mean marital aid or martial aid?Either way works.
>>46868884Oh god, it gets better with every post.My sides have god extra galactic.
>>46868884Metal as fuck.
>>46868884All of us stopped firing and just watched as the Deathwatch Marine went at it like a giant, hate-fueled anthropomorphic jackhammer. Each blow resulted in a pained screech and a flickering of the Daemonthrope's wings which dropped both it and the Space Marine increasingly large distances. The Heart-Marine didn't let a little thing like gravity deter him though. He kept up his attack until finally, when they were both about sixty meters off the ground, an especially violent blow left Spot well and truly stuck, and the Daemonthrope's wings shrank to little black pinpricks.We scrambled back as the pair of them slammed into ground, with the Space Marine on the bottom and with enough force to leave a power-armor shaped dent in the floor. Then after waiting a second to see if anything else would happen, Doc ran forward to check on the Space Marine, while Tink ran forward to check on Spot. The prognosis was grim in both cases, Doc was pretty sure that internal organs weren't supposed to be squeezing out through a wound in one's side, and Spot's jury-rigged battery unit burst into flames when Tink touched it. Even worse, when the battery caught fire, the Daemonthrope's wings flared to about the size of a chicken's and the gore that filled the room began flowing towards it.Tink started running around trying to rig up a new power source, while the rest of us began screaming at each other about whether or not we should try to kick/stab/laspistol the Daemonthrope to death (everyone but Tink was out of ammo) before it regenerated and killed us all. We were so wrapped up in this that it wasn't until Fumbles mentally poked at us that we noticed the two servitors and a slightly oversized servo-skull that had entered the room.
>>46869020Action is almost done, lore dump will take a while, because parts of it suck and need to be fixed.
>>46869119quick grab them
>>46869119How do you make a slightly oversized servo-skull?
>>46869161Ogryn skull?Astartes skull?
>>46869161Use an ogryn skull.
I was 50/50 on a Lamenters tattoo, now I'm sold. Thanks Shoggy.
>>46869161with a slightly oversized human-ish skull
>>46869119Hoo boy. But Emperor FUCKING Damn that Lamentor kicked ass. I think we have another addition to the poker table if he dies.
>>46869119Oh God two servitors and a skull... what fresh warp-spawned hell is this....I swear if these things get posessed by the daemon as its next hosts...
>>468691612 skulls and one roll of duct tape
I'm twelve and what is this
>>46869188>tattoosdegeneratealso have fun with your chronic bad luck.
>>46869161With a slightly oversized skull, naturally. Space Marine, Ogryn, maybe a particularly beefy Catachan, etc.
>>46869227Oh shut up you puritan
>>46869225the best story on /tg/
>>46869227Not emblazoning your body with ideals of your heros> in 2016Have fun with your cowardice, heretic
>>46869225http://www.theallguardsmenparty.com/you have some reading to do
>>46868884>>46869161Use abhuman remains?
>>46864402holy shit first time liveshitposting for the archivebtw I love you shoggy
>>46869119As soon as we'd turned (and Twitch had been stopped from snap-shotting anything), the big Servo-skull began transmitting a rather nasal voice. It welcomed us to the lab, informed us we were over two months late delivering the Zoanthrope, and asked if we'd seen the Inquisitor's rosette anywhere, as he needed it for opening the rest of the stasis units and-Doc (who STILL had the scalpel in his face) seized on the words "Zoanthrope", "my lab", and "stasis", and interrupted the skull. The medic, speaking quickly and rather incoherently, informed whoever was controlling the skull that if they wanted their damned Zoanthrope, we needed: a psi-suppressor equipped stasis unit, whatever parts Tink asked for, and another stasis unit to hold the Heart-Marine until we found the Apothecary. The skull rocked backwards, probably imitating its owner's shocked expression, and began to respond before Doc cut it off again with a shout of "NOW NOW NOW NOW".This was enough to convince whoever owned the facility that we were serious: the servo-skull fell silent and zipped away. Less than a minute later one of those prison-cell cubes was carried through the hole in the wall by the giant man-beast we'd seen in the middle of the fight. It was followed by some servitors carrying another cube and a wide selection of parts.With the help of the servitors and the giant (seriously, up close it seemed like a man-shaped bio-titan), the Daemonthrope was secured before its wings grew more than a meter long. The Wraithbone was hooked up to the cell's power supply, and since it was thoroughly embedded in Spot, the whole battered drone was taped to the ceiling just above the cell's stasis field. The Heart-Marine and all the organs Doc could find nearby (some probably weren't his) was put into stasis in time as well, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief.Then the servo-skull noticed the dead Eldar and started screaming at us, which pretty much set the tone for the next two days.
>>46868884That Lamenter is all of our heroes forever... holy fuck
Aww yissssssssssss caught it live
>>46869412We can rebuild him! We have the technology!
>>46869119DM fuckery right there. They'd been too stupid to use the servitors for power sources earlier so now their DM is throwing them a bone.
>>46869365>Then the servo-skull noticed the dead Eldar and started screaming at us, which pretty much set the tone for the next two days.Only good Eldar is a dead Eldar
>inbf this is all a big intro to a Rogue Trader campaign where Sarge bizarrely gets a warrant of trade somehow
>>46869365>(seriously, up close it seemed like a man-shaped bio-titan)Grotesque?
>>46869365>it seemed like a man-shaped bio-titanany thoughts what this is?Can't be just an Ogryn, they've seen Ogryn.Is it a Wolfen? It would have fur if that were the case.
>>46869452I'd read it.
>>46869365>Then the servo-skull noticed the dead Eldar and started screaming at us, which pretty much set the tone for the next two days.GODDAMNIT TINK!
>>46869482maybe an unknown abhuman like the werewolf man Inquisitor Psyker in Guant's ghosts. Or a Bone 'ead
Sarge was dressed up as a rouge trader at the beginning of interplanetary man of mystery and no one could remember why
>>46869482The Biologis make vatgrown superlaborers all the time. Dunno if they always have a name for the pattern.
>>46869452supporting this>All Guardsmen Only War Quest turns into All Guardsmen Dark Heresy Quest turns into All Guardsmen Rouge Trader Quest
>>46869365I'm actually kind of relieved they didn't have to kill the Daemonthrope. Be a shame to lose it after the trouble it took to get here.
>>46869536>implying it can be killed
>>46869365Well, that's actually getting a little ahead of things. At the time, we just put up with the ranting of the skull's owner (a man identifying himself as "Magos Smith" and the overseer of the facility), because he was the leader of the group of servitors and prisoners that had won the big melee in the warehouse. Having your own army, including a man-beast capable of flipping tanks one-handed, means you're "outspoken and eccentric", as opposed to "annoying and crazy".Anyway, the Magos got tired of yelling at about the same time Doc finished patching up the rest of us and finally got around to removing the scalpel from his face. The tech-priest announced that he "needed to organize the packing" and would meet us on the surface, and then the oversized servo-skull zipped off as a servitor equipped with an anti-grav pallet drifted into the room. We rode up to the top of the crater in style (a cargo pallet stitched to the augmented husk of a lobotomized criminal is stylish, right?), and met Sarge at the lip. At about the same moment as we disembarked, Jim and the Adepts began climbing through the doors to the elevator shaft. Jim was the first through the hole; he'd acquired a dozen servo-skulls during his adventure, as well as a few holes that were leaking blood and lubricant (Sarge winced and vowed to avoid Hannah for the next few weeks). Next came the Cogitator Adept, who looked like he'd licked an electrical outlet, and then the Xenologist Adept, or to be more precise, his corpse, was hefted through. Finally the Diplomacy Adept, who was completely fine, climbed out.Doc immediately ran over to give aid, while Sarge surveyed the ragged group for a few seconds and then asked what had happened. Jim shrugged and just said "turret", and the Cogitator Adept mumbled something about feedback, and the Diplomacy Adept cheerfully announced that he'd shot the Xenologist on account of him being a traitor.
>>46869365>Then the servo-skull noticed the dead Eldar and started screaming at usTHAT'S what he's screaming about? How about the inquisitor who died? How about a bunch of freaking Space Marines with broken ribs? How about the giant freaking hole in the roof of the base? How about the fact that the Zoanthrope is literally daemonically possessed? How about the fact they're two months late?But the one thing he's REALLY angry about is the dead eldar who could've died from like a thousand valid reasons over there?I kinda get the feeling GM was just still angry about her death. I mean, I get it, but that still seems like the weirdest straw to break the camel's back.
>>46869430Indeed we can
>>46869490The Eldar literally said "I would rather let She Who Thirsts ravage my delicious asshole then help you retarded Mon-Keigh shitheads!" That was not their fault for once!
>>46869573I've always loved that Diplo adept. You guys better have kept him.
>>46869589It was a magos man They always obsessed about research
>>46869573>and the Diplomacy Adept cheerfully announced that he'd shot the Xenologist on account of him being a traitor.There's always one, isn't there? FUCK
>>46869589Dude, do you have any idea how hard it is to capture Eldar alive?
>>46869610> Doc starts talking the Eldar into working together.> Eldar is listening.> Tink has Spot shoot her in the back.> Rather understandably upset about being dismembered in the middle of negotiations, she lashes out.Yes, it definitely was Tink's fault.
Okay, smoke em if you got em, I've got some straightening to do before I post the rest. It might take a while, because re-reading some of this stuff is painful as all hell. Worst case scenario the thread falls off before I get the last one posted, and I have to do like another 3 or 4 post thread, so whatever.>>46869458>>46869482It's not going the match anything specific in the lore, tech-priest who runs the facility is a whacked-out Magos Biologis>>46869627You'll love the rest of the chapter then
>>46869549"We tried to kill it!">"Did you use fire?""Uhh...no-">"Then you weren't REALLY trying too hard, were you?!?"<moments later>"We tried fire! It didn't work!">"Did you use ENOUGH fire?""N-">"THEN YOU WEREN'T TRYING HARD ENOUGH TO KILL IT!"<later>"We tried all of the fire we had. Didn't kill it.">"Well then, save a bolt pistol round for yourself, cause we are fucked like an Eldar on Fenris."
>>46869573>and the Diplomacy Adept cheerfully announced that he'd shot the Xenologist on account of him being a traitor.Man do I wanna hear the NPC party's story.
>>46869698Let's say it was only 90% his fault this time Fair?
>>46869706Roger roger, we'll be here.Thread ain't gonn' die, we're at page 1 and /tg/ is a big board.
>>46864827I'm horrified and aroused.
>>46869634>>46869694Oh, I assumed he was someone from inquisition.I guess the fact that eldar was literally was their most valuable test subject is pretty likely too.Well, at least they've got a daemonically possessed Zoanthrope now. Literally pushing the boundaries of science and what was thought possible, that's AGP for you.
>>46869698What really gets me, though...It's so OOC for Tink.I mean a naked, hot xenos techie who can SING?That's like, the kind of thing that you'd expect to make Tink so hard he could penetrate Ceramite power armor with his groin.
>>46869716>cause we are fucked like an Eldar on FenrisBy a bunch of yiffing furries?
>>46869759It wasn't a Tau.
>>4686973990%? Yeah, that's fair. Saying "I'd rather die than x" is an act straight out of the Codex Retardes.
>>46869759Counter point: She was fucking with Spot. NOBODY fucks with Spot on Tink's watch.
>>46869759>That's like, the kind of thing that you'd expect to make Tink so hard he could penetrate Ceramite power armor with his groin.It probably would have been under any other circumstances, but she was messing with Spot. You've got to dance with the one that brought you.
>>46869759Don't FUCK WITH SPOT
>>46869759there's really no evidence she's particularly tech savvy apart from messing with the wraithbone, and that was HIS, so it's a different matter.
>>46869778Neither are any of the coglasses he creeps on. If anything, an Eldar would be more humanlike, and likely more hot, than a blueberry.It's a joke in the All Cogbro Party that the Emperor will have to help us if we run into Tink. One of our group has a robotic dog, and my Cogless Coglass has no externally-visible augmentations unless she wants to, at which point she can light up like a christmas tree, make her eyes glow, make patterns of lights glow and run down her skin, etc. Also, she's wearing a full set of Mechanicus-red Guard-issued Flak Armor, is nearly 7 feet tall, and has windex-blue hair.... And our stubby Russian dwarf decided it would be a good idea to raise capital by selling pict-vids of Blue in the shower on the OB's black market. Emprah help us.
>>46869862>If anything, an Eldar would be more humanlike, and likely more hot, than a blueberry.You understand nothing about the Xeno fetish.
>>46869759Tink only gets hard when there's technology involved, and with Eldar it's all wierd pseudomagical animoo bullshit that isn't going to interest a red-blooded robofetishist. I mean, singing to make a brick into a dildo? Come on!
>>46869922>I mean, singing to make a brick into a dildo? Come on!If that doesn't give a man a semi chubb, what will?
>>46869968a nice plump earth caste girl with a plasma gun?
>>46869589I'm pretty sure that this is the guy who was running the facility as opposed to the Inquisitor and the deathwatch marines who were the ones investigating it. The inquisitor and space marines were irritating distractions impeding his work, and the hole in the roof was easily repairable. The eldar on the other hand was an extremely valuable specimen and one that he's going to have a hard time replacing. Damn right he's going to be pissed about losing such a specimen.>>46869610I think he's referring to how Doc had almost talked her down when Tink decided to just activate the psi-suppressor and shoot the crap out of her. Not many people are going to feel terribly helpful after that.
>>46868383>>46868433The team consists entirely of Lamenters
So what planet did this sorry bunch come from anyways.Did it do anything other than barf conscripts?
>>46870004It got nommed by Nids?Or am I mistaken.
>>46868703Now that's not fair, Mr. Martin doesn't make public appearances often, I have the right to ask him a question
>>46869706I don't think you have to worry about the thread dying, last one was up for another nine hours (plus minus two) after you stopped posting
>>46870040No they beat the 'Nids, and I don't think that was their homeworld
>>46869997I'm going to be completely honest, I forgot about the "Doc was talking her down" bit. But I stand by my direct quote from the crazy bitch.
>>46870040No, they got nearly murderized by Orks
>>46870004If you mean the All Guardsmen Party, they are five of the last fifteen survivors of the 99th Generian Medium Infantry (AKA Gener IC).And no, it is a deliberately basic, boring, generic (heh) regiment (and, presumably, planet).
>>46870004They're from a completely mundane civilized planet the planet Gener, and served in the Generian 99th Medium Infantry. Or as listed in the Munitorum records: GENER IC.
>>46870061She wasn't really crazy.I mean, they did shoot her while she was in the middle of entertaining their alliance offer. Nobody's going to feel cooperative after that.
>>46870166You do still have to remember how she attacked Doc while he was treating her though, so I'd say she's not without blame here.
>>46869030>GIVE THAT ASTARTES ENOUGH RECRUITS TO RESTORE THAT CHAPTER TO FULL
>>46869573Are Jim and Hannah siblings or just colleagues who've developed a strong friendship through the trials of having to put up with the bullshit, stupidity, heresy and/or incompetence of every other tech priest they know for so long?
>>46870219Yeah, but she was probably in a startled panic. I mean, that's not remotely unusual for Doc's patients, she was just better at hitting than most.>>46870223We'll recruit the Bloody Magpies! They can "Recruit" enough recruits to restore the Lamenters to full strength!>>46870230My bet is on siblings, BFFs or lovers, in roughly that order.
>>46870230I think they're closer than siblings.
>>46870143I am legitimately curious as to how many of the surviving characters made it through more than one battle or if they were wounded once and packed into a shuttle.Twitch is afraid of orcs so that indicates that he somehow lived through both campaigns which to me is astounding.
>>46870287All three, I think they had a city fight with cultists in between the orks and nids.
>>46870040>>46870093Both. And traitor guard.
>>46870310They fought all of these things, but I don't think any of them were on their homeworld.
>>46870267She's the reason he has a scalpel in his face
>>46870267I get that panic was probably involved, but the reaction afterward is usually to apologize, not say that you'd rather die than cooperate.
>>46870219>Wake up after getting shot by treacherous Mon-keigh.>One of said Mon-keigh is leaning over you holding a sharp knife (bear in mind that Craftworld medicine is almost entirely based on psychic healing so a scalpel would be almost entirely unfamiliar to a craftworlder.)>Treacherous deceiver puts down his torture implement and turns to look at something in the doorway.Wat do?
>>46870405Sure - IF you're being treated by your friend, not by the guy who's with the guy who shot you up in the first place, while the guy treating you was talking to you as, for all you know, a distraction.
>>46870418>>>46870310Like I said: GODDAMNIT TINK!
Why are we discussing the morality of shooting a fucking xeno?
>>46870472Because we are all filthy heretics?
>>46870472Because there are those whose Faith is lacking.
>>46870472It should be about which is better: burning or shooting the filthy xenos in the Emperors name?
>>46870472Because Shoggy aint posting fast enough for our needs, but the writefag game rediculous.
>>46869254>>46869270>Things that never happened You guys aren't serious, right?
>>46870639hold up everybody.
>>46870405Not when you've just been shot again. Here's how it went down.>Eldar tries to blast party with psychic lightning.>Doc tries to talk eldar down.>Tink activates psi-suppressor and shoots eldar.>Doc patches eldar up.>Eldar wakes up and stabs Doc in the face.>Tink, Twitch and Nubby shoot eldar again.Party tells eldar to surrender.>Eldar tells party to go fuck themselves.>Purgethexenos.pictcapture.The whole thing was the diplomatic equivalent of a train wreck from start to finish and is a perfectly accurate portrayal of how interspecies relations tend to work in 40k.
>>46869862You know it makes me super sad to check the archives and find you have only had one cogbro storytime in all this time, I seriously liked it and was looking forward to finding more but I have already read the one.Did you guys just stop playing or have you just not written it up yet?Would be great to have Shoggy storytime now and some Cogbros later! Pretty please with Promethium on top?
>>46870639It's a top 5 /tg/ write up, and easily the best episodic, and easily the best ongoing. And we know it actually happened.Point me to some better stuff
>>46870560Do you prefer your xenos grilled or in 'Swiss' form?
>>46870560Obviously both is best but in what order?
>>46869862>>46870700 I second this, If you stopped playing most DH/tg/ fags would kill to get into a cogbro game even over skype.
>>46870709>>46870682I'm not saying it's not entertaining, because it is, but seriously? The pretense that this is an actual campaign just allows for an informal writing style
>>46870747I like to roll them around in a nice bread crumb coating before i put them on the barbee but that's just me
>>46870700>>46870759No, we're still playing. In fact, our game last night was called early on account of a major medical emergency in my family.I'm being a lazy tard of the ass about writing it up. Sorry. Gotta lotta shit going on.Awhile ago, we wound up confronting Blue's most hated piece of machinery: Gantry cranes. Last few sessions, we had a couple of major "GODDAMNIT IVAN!" moments, too.
>>46870700Problem is really that we've had a hard time writing it up. Not sure why, I'm not the writer, just one of the players.Also, we've had all sorts of strange setbacks, including a sesh where we advanced a grand total of 20m and unleashed an UNSPEAKABLE EVIL without having access to a SAMURAI WARRIOR WIELDING A MAGIC SWORD.
>>46869573Before Sarge could get his mind around what he'd just heard, Twitch announced that he'd known the dead adept was a traitor all along, and asked if he'd been working with the Daemonids or the Orks. The old Diplomat told him it was the Orks, suggested he go figure out what data the deceased might have passed to the vile xenos, and then patiently waited for Sarge to ask something less retarded.After a painfully long wait, Sarge said he'd never seen the Xenologist Adept do anything traitor-y. The Diplomat pointed out that waiting to kill a traitor until AFTER they'd betrayed you would be horribly sloppy. Sarge nodded at this sage advice, asked how the diplomat had known the adept was a traitor, and immediately regretted the decision as the man launched into a long and detailed explanation. About half way through, Tink got bored and asked if the Diplomat was secretly an Inquisitor or something. This remark cause the old Adept to give up on his explanation with a pained sigh. He spent a few seconds thinking and then declared that he was not an Inquisitor, it was far too athletic a profession for him. He was just a simple adept who'd been part of Oak's retinue since the man was an Interrogator. Of course, he said, this meant he'd been in the Inquisition since before our great-great-great grandfathers had been born, and despite it not being the Administratum, seniority did still count for something.Essentially, he was Oak's trusted observer and knew how to Inquisit better than all of us put together, so we should shut up and trust him. Sarge announced that he was too tired to argue, and would worry about it later; Tink, Nubby, and even Twitch (who was flowcharting the Ork conspiracy all agreed. Doc asked if all that meant the Adept was supposed to be keeping us out of trouble, because if so, he'd been doing a terrible job of it. The Diplomat said he was actually pretty happy with our performance, which was pretty disturbing when we thought about it.
>>46870847We advanced 20m and closed a door, then welded it shut. The door which was behind us, through which all possible retreat lay.The other two doors, through which we could advance, had literal Daemons of the Warp and pic related in corridors two and three, respectively.We chose to fight the Daemons.
>>46870872>The Diplomat said he was actually pretty happy with our performanceNow, ones who outright fail aside, what the fuck would be classed as a bad performance then?
>>46870843>>46870847 Okay I understand you are busy, but there is like one story I can find and I have been left jonesing for more for what feels like years, although looking back it was only since December. The withdrawals are that bad maaannn
>>46870872>Twitch announced that he'd known the dead adept was a traitor all along, and asked if he'd been working with the Daemonids or the Orks. The old Diplomat told him it was the Orks, suggested he go figure out what data the deceased might have passed to the vile xenos, and then patiently waited for Sarge to ask something less retarded.I fucking love this guy.
>>46870872forgot your name Shoggy
>>46870000The All Emo KillteanA Lamenter, a Mortifactor, a Doom Eagle, a Raven Guard, a Blackshield, and a Dark Angel>>46870700>Did you guys just stop playing or have you just not written it up yet?The second one. We play slow and write slower.>>46870804The GM, Shoggy, and I think another player or two are around to verify, and it's an awful lot of effort to go through to present it as storytime if it's just original fiction.Just because you've never encountered one doesn't mean game groups as awesome as Shoggy's don't exist.>>46870872Shoggy, you're naked! Put your name on!>and even Twitch (who was flowcharting the Ork conspiracyI do believe you're missing an end paren.
>>46870950That Bitch and Bane Johns come instantly to mind.
Art arrived during re-writing!
>>46870938Where is the story you have wrote up? I'd read the crap out of that.
>>46871121>YOUZ GETS A SQUIGGIN, AND YOUZ GETS A SQUIGGIN, AND YOUS GETS A SQUIGGIN, EVERYONE GETS A ZOGGIN SQUIGGIN.
>>46871151I'm glad that ork oprah looks as insane as I imagined
>>46871149http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/44048143/>>46871121I hate to nitpick such awesome art, but isn't there supposed to be a chunk blown out of his side?>>46871179>Ork Oprah...oh zog me, how'd I not get that
>>46870872Further discussion on the subject of Adepts was called off by the arrival of the Apothecary and his patients. The Grumpy-Marine was looking especially ragged. In addition to a missing foot and forearm, he had enough broken bones and internal injuries to keep even a Space Marine on the bench for a few months. Also, the Apothecary said something about him having spinal damage due to a thirty meter fall directly onto his back. Sarge winced, but otherwise maintained his poker face.Aimy was in slightly better shape. She was conscious, moderately lucid (she was swearing pretty creatively), could see again, and was moving under her own power despite a fair number shrapnel wounds and minor burns. Her head though, was a mass of sprayed-on synth-skin with eyeholes cut in it. Doc was pretty sure that a lot of the synth-skin was extraneus though, and wagered that it was "only" the skin from her eyebrows up that was going to need to be replaced.Anyway, there was a fair bit of wincing when we saw Aimy, and Tink, ever the charmer, pointed out that she REALLY sucked at ducking. Twitch countered that she was actually pretty good at it, and she just had some sort of power that attracted energy attacks to the face. Nubby cheerfully pointed out that at least now she wouldn't have the skunk stripe, on account of how all of her hair would have to be regrown by the Hospitaller this time. Aimy reacted to these comments in the usual way.While the three assholes tried to avoid getting murdered by an enraged markswoman (and Fumbles ran around trying to calm everyone down), Doc and Sarge brought the two Marines up to speed on how the Daemonthrope fight had ended and the status of the Heart-Marine.
>>46869573>Diplomacy Adept cheerfully announced that he'd shot the Xenologist on account of him being a traitor.Minor character, but I really like this old codger.
>>46871225>Fumbles ran around trying to calm everyone down.Fumbles is a good boy.
>>46871151That's fantastic art right there.If that Ork is still alive he should be given his freedom. On a Traitor world. On the very edge of the galaxy.
>>46869573Man I really love that diplomacy adept. He always seems like the most competent one.
>>46871054Have you cog bros seen the new fan made Perils of the machine spirits tables. they're a boatload of fun
>>46871272Do you really think something powered by that much pure crazy and WAAAGH! juice can be contained for long? Best case scenario is that he fucks up that end of the galaxy before joining up with Ghazghull to wreck everything else.
>>46871284...I have not. Hit me.
>>46871284Link please? Google doesn't appear to turn it up
While since I've caught one of these live.Though I am really getting worried about whether or not Oak's actually a traitor.
>>46871462Hmmm.Yes, I do believe I can use this.I'm accumulating quite a collection of random tables for "SHIT HAS GONE WRONG."
>>46871584Care to share while we're waiting for Shoggy to rewrite history?
>>46871608I'm on my phone at the moment, and I'd like to keep some of them secret from my players until our campaign ends, but if the thread's still up when I get back to my laptop I'll scrounge up a few tables.My players themselves have made a fuckton of tables for the Ocurrence Border, most of which are collected on the ship's 1d4 page linked from the AGP page.
>>46871692What, no just randomly rolling dice to see what part of the ship tries to murder them in brand new and inventive manners?
>>46871736That's pretty much exactly what most of the tables are for. Hell, half the time I make it up based on whatever the roll inspires me to dream up on the fly.https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Occurrence_Border_Random_Encounters
>>46871764What would you say is the most inventive method you've created, by chance?
>>46871808Hmmm. Probably the invisible Warp tunnel made of meat, unless you count ones they managed to avoid.We're only three missions in, so there's plenty of time to top myself.
>>46871808As one of his players, I'd have to say fucking realistic Skulltullas, that we promptly named the OFUKNO Spider and preferred to march down a Warpy meat-corridor than fight through.Arachnophobia sucks.
>>46871881It's not Arachnophobia that sucks, it's the spiders.
>>46871881>>46871920Good point. Anyway, we have one in a lunchbox that Blue welded shut. We're considering what to do with it.Roasting it on a fire and eating it, after extracting its poison sacs, came up as an option. Personally, I favor "give it to someone we HATE."
>>46871881I'm an asshole, but I'm looking forward to throwing those at the arachnophobe in my D&D game once I resurrect it.It didn't occur to me that I might have one in the cogtimes.>>46871920Actually they did kind of the opposite. Copious venom injection hurts.
>>46871920Only f you let them get up close, I imagine.>>46871936Got any clerics on the ship you want to freak out?
>>46871952I intended to field them in 2+ pods of four at a time.A single one proved a moderately threatening encounter.
>>46871920Only if they close to melee range.
>>46871982Are you replying to me about freaking out the cleric or letting them get up close?
>>46872008Up close.It ended with one coggie now with a split knee.
>>46871225Bringing the Apothecary and his nearly-comatose battle-brother up to speed took a while, mostly because they kept asking for annoying little details and the Diplomat kept showing them a dataslate full of files he'd gotten from somewhere. Then things were delayed even further when the elevator was pried open by the giant man-thing, and the a tech-priest we assumed was the Magos (based on how he had the big servo-skull perched on his shoulder) stepped out.As the Magos and his entourage came over, we all reacted in the usual semi-paranoid way, but Jim took it a step further and stretched his mechadendrites out towards the tech-priest and his skull. This elicited a screeching burst of feedback which made us all flinch, and then the Magos' skull sped over until it was in front of Jim's face and screeched "TRY THAT AGAIN BOY, AND I WILL MELT THAT PATHETIC ORGAN YOU CALL A BRAIN OUT YOUR EARS, AND REPURPOSE YOUR SHELL AS A JANITORIAL SERVITOR." The Enginseer went as pale as he could, turned around, and ran off to go check on the shuttle; his flock of servo-skulls sped towards the Magos, and then disappeared into the facility. After that little show the Magos strolled up to the Diplomacy Adept, who (to our complete lack of surprise) greeted him warmly by name. The Magos responded by screaming at him about having asked for a Zoanthrope, not a daemon-tainted monstrosity. This ranting continued for several minutes, and also branched out to cover how even if the Zoanthrope had been untainted, all of the Magos' genestealers and cultists had been turned into Squigs. The Diplomat asked if they could be un-squigged, and was informed that it didn't work that way.The yelling ended (at least for the time being) with the Magos promising to file a complaint with Oak. He then turned to Sarge, and asked where the squished Inquisitor was. A minute later the Magos' skull flew down into the facility with an Inquisitorial rosette hanging from its oversized mechadendrite.
>>46872174What a dick.I like him already.
>>46872174Did...did Jim just try to hug a Magos?I suppose we should just be happy this one speaks proper Imperial.
>>46872248He DOES seem strangely likeable. Especially since the whole "I DIDN'T ASK FOR A DAEMONHOST" complaint is entirely valid.
>>46872174What %dinosaur is this Magos?
>>46872276To be fair, neither did the AGP.
>>46871584Sweet Jesus that gifAlso any word on whether the cogbros will write up more stuff since some people were talking about it. I love the Occurrence Border and want more stories about how shit goes horribly wrong and whether Ivan Ivanov is a warp entity that pulls vodka through the warp or if he secretly has a still on his body that distils liquor from warp phenomenon (which would explain why he has so much on the Occurrence Border).
I'm so turn between the desire to watch this finish and my desire to fire full torpedo spreads and then go to ramming speed in BFG: Armada.
>>46872314One of the players is in charge of writing, bug them. I just run the game and share images to post.Ivan brought a few bottles of vodka with him. Then... Well, I'll let you find out when it's storytimed.
>>46872314To answer your question, Ivan actually owns a still. He had hypochondriac techpriest help build it under the assumption it would be used for industrial-grade cleaning materials.
>>46872276And to be fair, Oak was the one to stick them on a ship that was one power failure away from becoming a space hulk to capture the damn thing in the first place, so they could honestly dump the blame on him for his present picking up warp taint.
>>46872370Mein neger.The game has a pause button, doesn't it? Just check back every few minutes.
>>46872380Honestly, I'm starting to suspect he is a traitor simply for not having the ship fed to a smelter, or used as a immobileOh god. It's a training ship. If you survive a trip on it, you can survive anything.
>>46872380To be fair to Oak, Nubby was the one who *bought* that ship. The ENTIRE mess is arguably his fault.
>>46872408I'm currently stuck with a machine that really really shouldn't be able to run it. I cry when I look at other people's screenshots of the game.My real machine should be coming back soon, but at the moment I'm not sure how well alt tabbing or trying to run the game AND chrome would go.
>>46872380But he was responsible for both assigning the supply officer that flagged that purchase to go buy it, AND authorising the actual purchase knowing full well that it was a few inches away from being a hulk... Not to mention screwing up/rushing the refit to the point where the lance battery can fire once and only once. Ever.That said: It's entirely possible to blame Nubby for this. All of this. Somehow.
>>46872447Of course it's all Nubby's fault.
>>46872557how can you a blame a half-rat for conforming to its nature?
>>46872438>Oh god. It's a training ship. If you survive a trip on it, you can survive anything.The ACP came to that conclusion, too. We don't even know it's connected to the =][= though.>>46872447GODDAMNIT NUBBY!
>>46872510Waaay back in Dude Where's My Psyker, Nubby was the one who prompted Sarge to shoot the Rogue Trader, the ONLY ONE WHO COULD HAVE FINGERED THE OTHER SHIPS INVOLVED IN THE SMUGGLING RING, thereby setting in motion the chain of events leading to the AGP being unable to get off Mr. Border's Wild Ride.So yes, it is Nubby's fault.
>>46872590Well, judging from the lack of cameras for Inquisition's Funniest Home Videos, it's probably how Oak gets his funding.
>>46872613Nubby is like a trickster from King of Dragon pass your screwed with him and your screwed with out him
>>46872438>>46872590Oh god...Oak is a wizard, the AGP are his familiars, and the Occurrence Border is Australia!
We're on Page 9. How many pages does /tg/ have, again? 15?
>>46872866Ten, same as any other board.
>>46872677So, Oak's the Pokémon Professor, the AGP used to be Pokémon but were upgraded to Trainers... What does that make the ACP, wild Pokémon in the tall grass?
>>46872942Huh, for some reason I thought we had more
>>46870872Looking back, this guy has been their velvet hammer all along. They never have "used it" because they were the All Guardsman Party.
>>46872866Dunno. I'll throw out something while waiting for shoggy to write-up, as its DH and IG related. Basically, my very first game of DH, I played a guardsman because:>"It's a beatstick/meatshield, good for testing the waters rather than jumping into a complicated class right away."I use the random tables for everything, and I end up with Fabio crossed with Rambo and Larry the Cable Guy, (or rather, Rancid Crabtree)>Blond, blue-eyed>Very good looking and buff.>Primitive world.I read the fluff on a primitive world, and something about what I read made me veer away from "Prehistoric man" or "Conan the Barbarian" because I heard dueling banjo's from out of nowhere.>Primitive world belief Random roll: Dirt Ward, IE, never bathe because evil spirits can track you by scent.I was the most hillbilly redneck guardsman you could ever meet, from the heavy stubber I named Martha.>"COME GIVE MARTHA A KISS!!!"To the home-cooking I provided for the rest of the group.>Hangs arbite shock maul off of something, crack a beer and watch the bugs and moths fly into it's electrical field and burst into flames.>Uses maul to cook Grox meat burgers for group.>Party member get's a chewy bit and pulled out a charred wing.>"What? It's what give it that smoky kick!"That was so much fun.
>>46873105I applaud you, sir.
>>46873105That sounds like a blast and/or riot. Possibly both. Well done.
>>46873105Fun times. Dueling banjos are a good thing to hear.
>>46872174There was an awkward moment after the skull departed where we all stared at the Magos, waiting for him to continue yelling or whatever. The Diplomacy Adept found this hilarious for some reason, and after a few seconds told us not to worry about it and went back to talking to the Apothecary about files, records, political cabals, and other such stuff we had no interest in.This continued a while, during which most of us wandered off to find some shade/water/smokes/etc. Sarge stayed put though, and after a few minutes he signaled the rest of us to return. We listed as the Apothecary announced that he'd suspected the Inquisitor hadn't been following proper disposal and investigative procedures, but the date we'd provided proved it. He was certain that the small room at the bottom of the crater was some sort of private cache, where especially valuable artifacts and samples were being stored for use by the Inquisitor. This was a grievous breach of responsibility, bordering on the heretical even, given the nature of the evidence being stolen. The Apothecary said he now believed that the mission had always been more about theft than investigation, which was probably why the Inquisitor had been so unhappy when the Deathwatch team had been assigned to "assist" him.The Diplomat smiled at this and, as if prodding a promising pupil, asked the Space Marine what he was going to do next. The Apothecary thought for a few seconds and then declared that his assignment had been to assist the Inquisitor in his investigation, not to perform it on his behalf after he'd gotten himself killed. This set off some sort of objection from the half-comatose Grumpy-Marine, but he was pretty incoherent, and the Apothecary just tranqued him and continued.
>>46873310>the Apothecary just tranqued him and continued.What chapter was he again? I'm liking Apothecary here.
>>46873310I love this Apothecary.
>>46873356Lamenter I think
>>46873238>>46873242>>46873249I had fun. First mission, we had to talk to some nobles, and IC I excuse myself to use the bathroom. Come back later with a confused expression and catch the nobles attention at a quiet moment.>"S'cuse me your...worshipfulness, but I got a question.">"Now, I ain't gonna disparage on your high-falutin' ways...but why do y'all have a drinkin' fountain right next to your toilet? That's just kinda strange ta me."The shenanigans I pulled. So much fun.
>>46873310So it was literally all just BS Inquisitorial rivalry? I'm now extra glade he got compressed into a meat cube. >>46873356Marines Errant
>>46873310To sum up what was, in our humble opinion, a bunch of overly-dramatic barracks lawyering: the Deathwatch Marines decided (with the occasional suggestion from the Diplomacy Adept) that they were going to just pack up their shit and go home. They would take command of the Inquisitor's ship (when it got back from futilely trying to send Astropathic messages) and any of his surviving retinue, and haul it all back to some Deathwatch Fortress or other, where THEIR superiors could sort things out.So basically: "Yeah, you guys are probably in the right here, but we don't want to get involved. We're going to creatively interpret our orders and just leave you here with your questionably-legal research facility, conspiracies and counter-conspiracies, and assorted other bullshit. We'll send a new investigation over to arrest you in a few weeks, try not to accidentally pack up all your shit and leave before they arrive."It was a very "Screw the Brass" response, and in that moment we all felt a very deep sense of camaraderie with the Marines. We didn't say anything though, because even the most reasonable Space Marine would probably take offense at being congratulated on how "Guard" their decisionmaking had been.Anyway, the Deathwatch wasn't going to start any fights with us, and as an added bonus, the Apothecary said he'd be taking Gravis off our hands. The Deathwatch would handle the rest of his treatment, and get both him and the Emperor's Scythes that we'd left stranded back to their chapter. Doc and Sarge both practically collapsed in relief. (And so did Nubby when the Marines just accepted the list of "Wargear lost due to enemy action")
>>46871274Second only to Rupert's Alfred
>>46873395Assuming, of course, that the surviving folks didn't doctor the evidence against him.
>>46873310Ah, so Oak ISN'T a traitor -- or at least the Inquisitor who claimed he is was just an asshole trying to steal stuff... but even a stopped clock is right twice a day, and given his secretivity about certain things I think it's still possible Oak is (even) more radical than he seems.I mean, he kept the AGP on as acolytes even after their total incompetence was obvious. He can't be that stupid, he must have an ulterior motive.(DUN DUN DUNNNN!)
>>46873510Eh at least they get the job done.
>>46873510>AGP>Total incompetenceThey actually were probably some of the best acolytes Oak has at sorting shit out and making sure rookie interrogators didn't ruin everything or weren't heretics/psykers/too dumb to live.Making them a real inquisitorial cell was probably something like the best decision he could have made.
>>46873356According to fluff Marines Errant. They got their main source of geneseed swiped and it's now no fucks given. A couple of "companies" have been sent out with Rogue Traders on contract.
>>46873636They even keep the too-dumb-to-live ones alive oftener than not. The Rupert and the asshole from Guardsmen and Pilgrims spring to mind.
>>46873510>>46873553I think Oak is taking a "right man in the wrong place" approach with the AGP. He knows they're going to Guardsman their way through things and that's the brilliance of them
>>46873636I also find it funny that the most competent (and I use that term loosely, very loosely) interrogator before Sarge also came from the guard, albeit the officer corps.
>>46873709You mean Alfred, the Rupert's attache?
>>46873737The Rupert really wasn't so bad himself.
>>46873795Not so bad, he was by far their best interrogator, barring Sarge himself of course.
>>46873795Aside from being the LITERAL incarnation of that nickname?
>>46873693The Rupert isn't that bad. He's shown to be actually quite competent as a General, Politician, Fighter and is an all around decent guy.His issue is that he's mostly competent as a Gentleman General, lacking some of the more subtle talents needed for an Inquisitor, but then that's what you have competent subordinates for.And anyhow, he's acknowledged his own lack of abilities, turned down a promotion just to improve himself. That makes him better than the majority of people.
>>46873795Can't forget Bane Johns, years later rogue traders scream his name in terror
>>46873888He had latent psychic powers. Making him a witch.
>>46873432Once the Marines had wandered off, the Diplomacy Adept breathed a sigh of relief, and announced that it was probably time for us to know what was really going on. There was a unanimous sarcastic response about how that would be a nice change, which the old man ignored as he explained that he could only give us the basic story. Apparently the question of "whether to burden us with the details" was something best left up to the Inquisitor that Oak was assigning us to for our next mission. We all took note of that part, but kept quiet since the Adept was finally telling us stuff we needed to know.The Adept started talking about all sorts of political stuff, with factions, and conspiracies, and schools of thought, and other shit, then paused when Tink asked whether "Thorianism" meant that the Inquisitor was really fond of thunder-hammers. The Diplomat dialed the level of detail down a little bit, and tried again. After three more attempts, all of which ended in spectacular confusion, the old Adept took a seat on a pipe and restarted one last time.>Look, ever since Oak first became and Inquisitor, he's been struggling against an enemy inside the Inquisition. We don't, or at least I don't, know exactly who these people are, but we call them and their minions the Sus-naevum Conspiracy, after the name of the school they tried to build. No, not "Sues-Neigh-Vroom", it's High Gothic. Please stop trying just call them The Conspiracy...>Okay, this obviously isn't getting through to you. Let's try this again with visual aids. You see this sock that I'm drawing an =][= on?
>>46873979Hi, I am a shadowy group of Inquisitors who have fallen under the influence of chaos, you can call me The Conspiracy>Hello, I am Inquisitor Quercus, but you can call me Oak.Hahahaha, we are going to use Inquisitorial resources to create a successor to the Cognitae, which was and "evil super heretic school for bad people".>An evil Inquisitorial school you say? I am going to stop you, then take your plan and use it to make a good Inquisitorial School. TAKE THAT!CURSES! You and your retinue of brave, intelligent, and handsome individuals have foiled our evil plot! We will get you for this Oak, and take the school back for ourselves!>Not if I get you first! TAKE THAT, AGAIN!Ha, that was only one of our useless minions, we're far too evil and sneaky for you to ever catch us for real!>No one is "too evil and sneaky" for me to catch! I'll track you down, even if it takes me three hundred years!
>>46873833Keep him away from any battlefields and other opportunities to nobly sacrifice his men and he handles things pretty well.
>>46873979I honestly would've been disappointed if it didn't devolve to this.
>>46870872>Twitch (who was flowcharting the Ork conspiracyOh shit guys, I just realised something. The title of this chapter is The All Guardsmen Party and the [REDACTED] Conspiracy. Take a wild guess at what the redacted word was originally.
>>46874010>image>filenametippity top kek, Shoggy, I love you
>>46874010The sock puppets are back!You'd think by now he'd skip straight to them.
>>46874010Tell me the GM brought out a pair of sock puppets again. Please.
>>46874010I love you shoggy.
>>46874010Does Dip adept get a sock allowance?
>>46874010>Inquisitor QuercusYou glorious son of a bitch.He really is Oak.
>>4687401022/25 POSTSSLEEP SOON COMRADESwell, not really, we're probably going to stay up and babble at each other for a while once it's over before the thread falls off the end of page10
>>46874010At this point Nubby interrupted to ask if Oak was really three hundred, and if that was the case why did he look all young and normal while the Adept look like little old raisin-man. The Adept put the sock puppets down with a sigh, and said that Magos Smith helped with that.Before anyone else could ask pedantic questions, the servo-skull returned and both the Magos and his giant man-beast started moving again. They both strolled over the elevator and retrieved a mobile stasis-unit that matched the one we'd seen in the cell we'd crammed the Daemonthrope into. As he brought it over towards us, the Diplomacy Adept announced that we could get the rest of our information from Inquisitor Sciscitat. There was a brief period of confusion until the Adept explained that Sciscitat had been Oak's liaison to the Magos, not the Inquisitor who'd been compressed into a ball of gore.Anyway, the Adept claimed that Oak had sent a message to the base saying we should be assigned to this Inquisitor after our delivery. Sarge looked at the orders and acknowledged that they looked pretty official, but didn't actually have any clue if it was real or not.The stasis unit deactivated and the Inquisitor slowly sat up. He scanned the area, and then his eyes came to rest on Sarge. Realization hit them both at the same time.>Oh, not YOU again.Aimy, Twitch, the Adepts, and the Magos all watched in confusion as the rest of us alternately groaned, swore, and cursed ourselves for not remember that "Sciscitat" had been the name of the second Interrogator we'd ever been assigned to…
>>46874099>MFW I google Quercusalso captcha, ice cream is not soup
>>46874010The "brave, intelligent and handsome" obviously refers to the diplomacy adept, not to the AGP.The "one of our useless minions" is probably "the bitch."
>>46874134Wait, the "Dude Where's My Psyker?" guy?
>>46874134He's the techno-interrogator right? The one that hated them from Dude Where's My Psyker?
>>46874134>the second Interrogator we'd ever been assigned to…Oh, crap, was that the guy whose report they doctored? This is gonna be bad...
>>46874134>>Oh, not YOU again.OH BOY
>>46874134This won't be good.
>>46874134And that's it for this part!Sorry if it's awkward, I pushed a little of the talking off for the next bit because it was just hard to fit in. So a bit more loreing at the start of the next half-chapter before things get rolling.I'll be around till the thread dies if you got questions, otherwise hit my email up or start a thread tomorrow or something.I'm not going to try to predict when the next half-chapter will be. I'd say 3ish weeks, but can't promise that house and work shit won't interfere.Next chapter is the return of the x,y,z, and maybe the rest of the alphabet chapter. You've been warned.
>>46874134Bwahahaha, lovely. That interrogator was the one that got Heavy killed right? The guy who thought they were completely incompetent and was just in love with himself. Well then, this should be fun.Also, I'm still suspicious that this diplomat isn't telling us everything. If he really is a loyal comrade of Oak and is privy to all these secrets, a member of his inner-circle, why was he allowed to be shipped off with the AGP? Why didn't he even get access to that youth treatment. Something smells off here.
>>46874207I dunno, I think it's gonna be pretty straight forward. They're gonna fucking frag him, end of story.
>>46874134Oh my God, THIS fucknugget they trolled cause his pet psy-ker-copath's got Heavy killed and all he did was whack-off his own ego and blame the AGP for everything that went wrong!Fuck every last square inch of this guy!
>>46874235Love you Shoggy!Thanks for running
>>46874243I mean... He's gonna have plenty of time to get to know the guards back on the shipofmanydeaths.Accidents happen.
>>46874240>why was he allowed to be shipped off with the AGP?AGP has proven to be surprisingly effective on missions.
>>46874235>a bit more loreing at the start of the next half-chapter before things get rollingJust how I like it, anyway. Lets us get comfy before everything goes ploin-shaped.>spoilerWE ARE ALL ALPHARIUSFor those of you hoping for Cog Times, I'll put together an image folder to help speed along the posting of our second episode, but I don't know how soon the chronicler will be able to storytime it.
>>46874282Didn't this asshole also have his own ship way back when? If I recall correctly it was largely taken up by a massive cogitator array he had set up for himself. Maybe that wasn't a void ship?
>>46874282There's like, almost certainly MILES of territory on the Occurrence Border that are absolutely lethal to a non-com (or anyone, really), it wouldn't be hard to give him bad directions right into the Warp Fungus bay.
>>46874313Is Cog Times on sup/tg/ or elsewhere? I could always do with more reading material.
>>46874235>the x,y,z and the alphabet chapterShoggy, it's late, man. My brain is tired and my eyes are heavy. Who or what the fuck are this group of alphabet soup?
>>46874356I second this. Alpha and Omegon? So alpha legion bullshit?
>>46874331And yet you bet he has some really important information, and if AGP kills him too quickly, it's gonna bite them in the ass later.And here I was thinking where that guy went off to.
I'd just like to say thanks Shoggy, and that I was literally howling with laughter at times here. Really hoping no one in the house can hear me.And slightly worried if they can, because if so they should have damn well checked on the man making horrible noises for minutes straight.
>>46874187>>46874191Yep>>46874207Yeah, so about that report... Even though we kept our own reviews subdued, it mayyy have turned out that that was high praise compared to how he rated every other team he's been sent...That took an impressively long time to bite us in the ass.>>46874320It will come up in the next chapter's lore, but it's a small non-warp ship that's currently being held in a hold of the squished inquisitor's ship.>>46874356Everything starts coming back full circle.>>46874271Glad you had fun!>>46874410Could be worse, I remember reading Shadowrun Storytime in a college computer lab. That was awkward at times.
>>46874386Yeah... but we can dream, can't we?
What is this shadowrun storytime? GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!
>>46874410Maybe they thought you were wanking or something.>>46874469Thanks for writing these out, man. It's always a blast.
Anyone want to rampantly speculate about what things coming full circle could mean?
>>46874538DM hands them Only War books and welcomes them to battlefield
>>46874469So let me get this straight...Squished-Inquisitor guy was in the conspiracy. He had a warpship.His warpship carried "Dude Where's My Psycher"-Interrogator-now-Inquisitor and his cogitator-packed smaller ship to this facility.At some point Squished-guy stuffed Tech-guy into a stasis unit. Squished-guy and the conspiracy are trying to fuck over Oak, so he branded him a false Inquisitor so he could fuck over the AGP and steal stuff from the lab.The lab is owned by Magos Smith, who hopefully was unaware that Tech-guy had been incapacitated. His lab has a bunch of toys and actually wanted the Zoanthrope. And apparently he was willing to tolerate Squished-guy, at least until he tried to steal a bunch of shit.And Sarge has neutronium balls for sassing a Space Marine.
>>46874527theallguardsmenparty.com>>46874538Alpha Legion is backSmuggling ring is involved in The ConspiracyThe AGP induct the shattered remnants of a regiment to the Inquisitionoh sweet Emperor there's a tick in my hairThat Bitch's colleagues try her trick againBane Johns is used as a psychic Eversor
>>46873636They're pretty competent but really unsubtle and not really all that "inquisitive".It's not like they purposefully devolve any situation to a gunfight; they actually actively avoid those. It's just that in many cases they're not good enough at investigative stuff to do it in a way that doesn't lead to a gunfight. Then again, they occasionally can do diplomacy too (the whole incident with Eldar cooperation was technically full-fledged Diplomacy, and they had almost not help from an Adept there). Also, it can be compensated for with good support, and they work some insane feats on really low resources (their greatest strength, really) once you point them in the right relative direction.Also, Oak must've noticed that, because most of their missions don't really require much subtlety, besides not being suicidal, which they can do. And he skimps on equipment all the time (OCCURENCE BORDER).
>>46873979>Sus-naevum Conspiracy, after the name of the school they tried to buildWhich is pidgin latin that translates to: The pig - WartHogwarts, the big conspiracy is Hogwarts. This chapter is the All Guardsmen Party and the Hogwarts Conspiracy.MFW
>>46874603A school for witchcraft and wizardry... fuck, its psykers all the way down!
>>46873105>(or rather, Rancid Crabtree)... I thought I was the only person who remembers those books. Wow.
>>46874469Wait, so the reason he was assigned to you for an important mission is because Oak though HE LIKED YOU?This is freaking hilarious.
>>46874592The drone heist one? Any more?The latter half of the stories have been at least somewhat connected, but I feel like most of the early stuff was pretty episodic, unless I'm missing something.
>>46874527>>46874592No, as in THE Shadowrun Storytime, which is still the best Shadowrun fiction to hit the internet.http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=shadowrun+storytime
>>46874670WELP. So much for sleeping tonight.
How many chapters are left?
>>46874670I love you.Sleep wasn't need anyway.
>>46874589Annnd, there are now enough Inquisitor level folk all into the AGP's shit to have the Tribunal that has been mentioned at for several segments. I hope everyone likes their penal collars or semi enforced Warrant of Trade.
>>46874717>>46874710Fucking newfags not knowing about based America-san
>>46874717If your spelling is any indication you might need that sleep more than you think.
>>46874719Is Warrant of Trade even a punishment?Doesn't it basically allow you to go wherever the hell you want and do whatever the hell you want?
>>46874589More like this:The Magos ran the Facility, and tech-guy + his ship + his retinue were there as a liaison.Squished guy (who is probably evil) shows up with an entire light-cruiser, and says everyone is under arrest for heresy.EVERYONE is put into stasis cells (except Magos, because he's tricky). Tech-guy's ship is locked down and stored in the light-cruiser, because it wouldn't fit in the evidence warehouse anyway.Squished guy goes through the motions of heresy investigation while stealing a few things for nefarious purposes.AGP HAPPENS
>>46874805Also makes sense. Thanks!What's Squished-guy's name? Inquisitor Horcrux or something?
>>46874589>>46874805And all this foiled by the fact that the guy seriously didn't expect the Tyranid they got to him to be daemonically possessed. Otherwise he would have been completely successful too.Perhaps they should say thanks to the demon guy if they ever are unlucky enough to meet him again somehow.
>>46874747I saw that before I posted, but figured it was good for some laughs. You're probably right, but I'll likely go fight the gothic war instead.>>46874768Yeah, but it also removes you from politics as well at some level. You'd do it to an overly successful Guard general for example, to stop him deciding to set up his own empire. Or just because he was in your way politically.Sort of similar to offering someone an ambassadorship or unimportant cabinet post to get them out of the House or Senate in the States.
>>46874742Give me some credit. I'm aware of TwoDee's story, if only from poststory discussion like this in the earliest AGP threads, but now I'm actually reading it.>>46874805>AGP HAPPENSI'm starting to think they're a valuable hammer, and Oak is being very thoughtful about which nails and/or screws and/or breakables are most important. Clearly this was a big one.
>>46874134>Aimy, Twitch, the Adepts, and the Magos all watched in confusionI think you mean Aimy, Tink, the Adepts, and the Magos all watched in confusion
>>46874873He's officially Sciscitat, we called him Sherlock at the table.Party called him "the Interrogator", and now "the Inquisitor">>46874899Yeah noticed immediately after I posted, at least I can fix that for the archive (I mistype Tink/Twitch a fucking ton)
>>46874914He meant Squished-guy, not Techjerk-guy.
>>46874873>>46874939Oh, we called him red-shirt or monotone.He didn't leave a serious lasting impression, despite being part of this huge evil organization out for our blood.
>>46874313I love you
>>46874914So you guys assumed the Squished-guy was "Sciscitat" when you landed at the end of Tyranid Delivery Experts. But he wasn't, and you didn't remember that it was the name of someone you'd worked for before until he got out of the stasis unit.Will we end up finding out what happened to the Captain and the Occurrence Border during all this in the next chapter?
>>46875044Yep, and yes we'll be hearing what the OB was up to at the start if next chapter. (Also the Magos and all of his stuff will be moving in, that's a fun sidenote)
>>46875097That sounds like literally the worst idea. Sure, lets put all of the unstable research and xenos on the warp tainted quasi space hulk.
>>46875097Fantastic. Thanks for some epic stories man. In all seriousness, you and a few other writefags have gotten me interested in tabtletops. I'm still looking for a group but you're certainly inspired me.On a related note, have you ever heard of the SilverClawShift Campaign Archives? The "Crystal Cantrips" story was about as epic as the AGP.
>>46875097How many chapters are left? Will you continue writing something else after you're finished with AGP?
>>46875011oh gosh>>46875097>(Also the Magos and all of his stuff will be moving in, that's a fun sidenote)AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>>46875148Those archives were so great. The thread of them trying to figure out how to survive the kython attack on the village was wonderful.
>>46875148Yep! It and the binder story were what got me started on storytimes, then came the /tg/ classics, then came all this.>>46875155Technically 1.5 left, but you might as well call it 3, since I'll wind up inevitably splitting the next chapter.After the end, I don't know. I do intend to keep writing stuff, and we'll be playing again in the summer, but I don't know whether I'll do another big series, or try to go back and polish AGP into something presentable, or what.No matter what though, I'll always be lurking on tg.