>Cast Find Familiar>Glowing arrow points at the closest familiar
>Cast Fireball>A non-descript palm sized ball appears in your palm and hurtles towards the point you aim at.
>Ghoul Touch>Your hand is magically lead to the nearest ghoul for you to feel
>>42885962>Cast Find Familiar>Glowing arrow points at the closest thing you're familiar with
>color spray>alters the color of any stream or splash of liquid>blade ward>protects knives and swords>cloudkill>disintegrates a cloud or patch of fog>sunburst>destroy the solar system
>Time Stop>You know exactly how long you cease moving for>Hold Monster>You embrace the nearest reprehensible person>Fire Bolt>A crime fighting dog loses it job
>>42886081>cloudkill>murders an ex-SOLDIER
>Turn Undead>you rotate the nearest nonliving entity in the desired direction.
>Ironwood>Removes all the creases from a wooden object
>>42885962The question I ask myself is, "Why is /tg/ greentext shitposter-tan not banned yet?"
>>42886554>Turn Undead>Become a Skeleton
>Bull's strengthDetermine the ability modifier of nearest Bull's strength score.
>>42885962>cast blink>everyone around you blinks >>42886742shut up, it has potential for being amusing
>>42888287>cast Shocking Grasp>grope the nearest living being
>>42888287>Cast blink>You blinkI'm sure some guy somewhere would find applications for both versions of the spell.
>>42888287So could someone cast a longer version of blink and make people shut their eyes for a few seconds, or would the effect be people continue to blink for a few seconds?
>>42886261>>Fire Bolt>>A crime fighting dog loses it jobHa
>Book titled "Spell Book">It's a dictionary
>Burning Hands>Hands begin to smolder>Detect Thoughts>begin thinking about spells>Blur>Four english blokes with instruments appear
>cast knock>a sharp rapping sound echoes throughout the room on the other side of the door
>>42888771>Detect thoughts>You are now able to tell whether or not someone is thinking
>>42888875... that could be really useful to spot mimics
>>42888528>Book titled "spell book">contains in big letters "B-O-O-K" on every page
>>42888457>Amelia Bedelia the spellcasteroh god no
>Repair Light Damage>Repair the nearest source of light.
>>42891409Fuck yeah, never have to buy bulbs ever again!
>Bigby's Grasping Hand>Summon Bigby's actual physical hand, in the exact condition that it is at the moment of casting, to grasp an object.
>>42886054>Ghoul Touch>The nearest ghoul's hand is magically lead to you to feel you
>Identify Magical Item>Disembodied voice says: "Yes, this book IS magical, how did you guess?"
>leomund's tiny hut>you summon what is essentially a dollhouse replica of leomund's infamous hut
>Slide>Open a powerpoint presentation
>CelebrationYou throw a party
>Erase>Erases itself from the spellbook
>veil>summons a wedding veil>anti magic field>summons a sentient field who hates magic. His existence is suffering.
>>42885972wouldn't that be 'Cast Fire Ball'?
>>42885962>Cast Featherfall>Feathers spontaneously appear and fall to the ground around the caster
>>42894065Fizban? Is that you?
>>42885962> literal spell bookIt is a school book that helps children with their spelling.
>Mass suggestion>You get a megaphone>Cure wounds>You salt, dry and smoke a wound>Stoneskin>Your skin turns into actual stone>Cloud of daggers>You summon a cloud of dagger-particles>Find traps>Opens 4chan
>>42894209>Mass suggestion>You ask someone to gain/lose weight
>>42894090Dragonlance books...Childhood feels.
>Tenser's Floating DiskYou summon a circular pontoon.>Raise DeadTarget corpse floats upwards.
>>42892052could still be usefulI mean sometimes you don't care what kind of magic it is, just whether it is magical or not(e.g. Rings, Clothing)
>Raise UndeadYou conjure an undead infant to nurture into a respectable member of society
>>42895008That is adorable.
>>42888858Sounds like a horror story
>Cast Weird>Hmm. That's weird...
>>42891169>Amelia Bedelia the spellcaster
>detect secret>"Anon likes little girls"
>>42895540The joke is that it's literally knocking on the door
>Phantasmal Killer>kills phantasm>Glue Seal>Target seal is unable to move, but retains ability to bark
>Weird>Glowing arrow points back at you
>>42890766I want to make a dungeon boss a half senile Lich, and I am going to add this to it.
>>42891169>>42895590Many will die. They will be the lucky ones.
>>42892052>Identify magical item>"yep, its a book alright"
>Tongues>Causes all people in a 15ft radius to stick out their tongues.
>>42891409>Cure Light Wounds>Cure's the nearest wound with a light covering of Salt.
>>42891409>Repair Light Damage>counteracts color fading from extended exposure to sunlight
>orient self>become chinese
>dispel magicNothing happens, or the spell dispels itself.
>Seal MagicYou fire a seal at the enemy.>Mage's HandSummons a severed hand from a mage.
>Contact other PlaneYou are now a radio operator.
>Polymorph Any Object>Polymorphs something, somewhere
>>42894209>Stoneskin>You conjure the nearest family member of a nearby rock.
>Blend>Target is violently shredded to a milkshake consistency
>>42900291>orient self>creates a chinese doppleganger
>>42901813>Stoneskin>Target rock is wrapped in a layer of soft, warm flesh.
>Hide from Undead>teleport the skin from the nearest undead creature to your hands
>>42901857>Stoneskin>Shaves off the outer layer of a rock and forms it into a pelt
Cloud Shape>Your body takes the shape of a cloud. Just the shape.Plant Voice>Plants don't talk. Use this on annoying people.
>>42901883>Stoneskin>pelts target family member with rocks
>>42902057>>Your body takes the shape of a cloud. Just the shape.How horrifying.
>>42902057>Plant Voice>Secretly leaves a voice somewhere on the person of the target.
>>42885962>GlitterdustTransmute all dust into glitter
>Mage Armor>Gives you a suit of armor made out of mages>Memory Lapse>Hey, what happened to my spell slot?>Ear-Piercing Scream>Everyone who hears you scream immediately gets an earring in each ear.I hear that last one is pretty good against elves
>Gaseous FormCreates vaporous paperwork.
>>42902640>Plant VoiceGive the nearest plant the ability to speak
>>42903264I like to imagine most plants are immensely racist.
>>42896010>>Phantasmal Killer>>kills phantasmHenry Olusegun Adeola Samuel becomes magically rooted to the spot.
>Cure Light WoundsCures sunburns>Cure Moderate WoundsCures mental scars created by a forum/chat moderator>Speak With AnimalsCompels you to make unintelligible noises when any animal is aroundl; Lasts for one hour
>Unseen ServantRender target butler or maid invisible.
>>42886081>blade ward>forces you to ensure the wellbeing of the nearest sharp implement
>Burning HandsSets all hands in the area on fire.
>Dimension doorYou now know the exact dimensions of the nearest door
>Xing Ray/Ray of XSummons Ray Romano, and gives him a 10ft aura of the desired effect.
>>42901632But only if you're also on a plane.
>Animate objectCreates a sequence of pictures of desired object, each with a tiny difference in its position or movement.>BarkskinYour skin now makes barking noises.>Flesh to StoneFlesh will try to align itself towards the nearest stone.>Cure Serious WoundsOnly works if you're not amused.>Detect Snares and PitsDoubly useless, will tell you if you're close to either peaches or drums.>DisintegrateDue to a wizard with poor math skills, this will give you a derivative of some function.>Pass without TraceIf she's getting really annoying, you could just leave her behind.
>Minor CreationCreates a miniature reality.>Major Creation"My friends, it has often been said-" etc etc.
>GreaseSprays lard all over the place.
>Minor CreationCreates a child.>Major CreationCreates a military officer.
>>42886687I lost it.
>Cone of ColdSummons a Cornetto.
>Mass suggestion>"You should go to church."
>Ensnaring StrikeMakes people join a worker's protest.
>>42885962Please stop forcing your shitty fucking drawings, thanks.
>>42886261>Fire Bolt>a shitty Australian newspaper hack that wishes he was Rush Limbaugh loses his job
>>42894209Cure wounds could be a nice interrogation tool
>Lay On Hands>you feel a strange compulsion next time you rest to give yourself pins-and-needles
>>42903548>grease>Everyone breaks into song
>>42885972>Fireball>one of your balls explodes in a blast of fire
>>42904074OOH OOH OOH, HONEY
>>42902804This is a war crime.
>>42903554>Major CreationCreates Major Major Major Major.He's very confused.
>>42903554>Major CreationCreates a short burst of notes that sounds happy.>Minor CreationCreates a short burst of notes that sounds sad.
>Chain Lightning>Hold target lightning bolt prisoner
>>42886742It's really not, though. It's not a "Hey, /tg/, I want to play a Kender straight, wat do?", "Excuse me, Commissar" or "le anime reaction image thread", for example.
>>42904324Don't worry about him too much. There was a minor invasion over the weekend, and it's easy to get confused and to lash out at everything and anything.
>>42901638That's super evil.
>>42885962> Detect Magic>Detect's itself as magic
>Burning HandsSummons a maids and/or butlers... who happen to always be on fire.
>Burning handsCauses the hands on all clocks within range to ignite.
>Death WardYou become the legal guardian of the Grim Reaper>PrayerSummons a monk to your side>IdentifyCompels the caster to shout his name, occupation and home country>Find the PathMakes the caster realize that he must become the path before he can find the path>Insect PlagueBugs get infected with a disease with a certain radius of the caster
>>42888875This is actually what the spell does at the lowest level. Go figure.
My group came up with "misspells" for shits and giggles. >Speak with DadSummons your father. You two catch up. It's really nice. >Mime Stop>Detect Weevil>Polymorph Shelf>Clownburst
>Divine Intervention>Your god comes down to have a sincere talk about your hoarding problems
>>42885962>mass suggestion>compels nearby individuals to guess at each other's weight
>>42905474Mass =/= weight, but nice try.I'd say that the spell gives you a suggestion of the mass of something. Not a good suggestion, though.
>>42896010LMAO at Glue Seal
>>42904184This would actually be really useful for some sort of energy source
>>42903404Sounds useful to me.
>Blur90s pop rock start playing.
>>42904074This spell is hyyyyyyyyydromatic.
>>42905791Is it Ultramatic?
>>42886321>Cloudkill>The internet storage goes down.
>BreachKnocks holes in things
>>42901632>Contact other Plane
>>42898540>Miley Cyrus music video
>>42886742Who cast 'remove fun' on you this morning?
>>42903264>plant voice.When you try to speak vegetable matter erupts from your mouth.Or.Your voice is now emanating from a fixed point three feet underground.
>>42901601> dispel magicAll ritten spells now contain spelling erors
>>42905513Mass suggestion.Compel nearby individuals to attend church.A must have for any cleric.
>>42891409>Repair Light damage>Cures sunburn
>teleportSpell book teleports out of your hands to a random location
>teleportyou inform a port of something
>>42905443Could be useful against dragons.
>protection from law>you gain diplomatic immunity
>>42907368And then this happens. >>42905384
>>42901829>will it blend?>that is the question
>See InvisibleCaster can see invisible things. And nothing else.>Mirror ImageReverse target image.>Water BreathingCasters lungs fill with water.
>>42904074Interesting. Tell me more!
>>42910662>Magic Missile>summons a projectile rocket powered by magic
>>42911320>Magically a missile with a live warhead appears in front of you - better run!
>42905384>ClownburstSummons a rock and roll clown, two clownettes, and a mountain of cocaine. Roll 1d6 for name of clown and another for behavior.Name:1-6: Doctor RocksoBehavior:1-6: Does Cocaine
>>42915532What is this? A clown for ants?
>>42888858>a sharp rapping sound echoes throughout the room on the other side of the door>a sharp rapping soundWouldn't it be easier to just Summon Eminem?
>>42907442>repair light damage>cures any and all electromagnetic radiation-based illnesses and diseases
>>42894065From the John Woo school of spellcasting
>>42886752I remember the first time I played Morrowind I thought that the skill literally turned you into an undead and was disappointed that it didn't.
>>42903300They're also psuedointellectuals. What with the self-pollenization, it's literally jerking yourself off to yourself
>>42888358>cast blink>everyone around you blinks I can see it being useful for a tense duel or something. Force your enemy to close their eyes for just long enough for you to fatally stab them.
>>42902640>Echoes act 1>>42903433Frustratingly enough, no moving company uses this>>42903530>DisintegrateYou have made Strom Thurmond so proud>>42903534>Major CreationSummons a leg-lamp.>>42903612>Cone of ColdSummons a Cornetto, along with its accompanying Simon Pegg movie
>>42905384>Mime Stop>*sign language for "The world"*
>>42918330I'd stop the world and melt with you.
>magic weaponNearest weapon turns into a wand that is faintly magical.> Shocking WeaponNearest weapon turns into an erect bull penis.> Charm personA miniature decorative ornament appears in the shape of a human.> SleepCaster goes to sleep>Sleep MassNothing happens, everyone at mass is already asleep.> BlurCasters vision becomes hazy.> Finger of deathA finger appears, followed by an extremely angry man in a cloak made of shadows.
>>42918457[Modern English] and [Bowling For Soup] would be cool Stands
>>42918546The joke is that Modern English did the original "I Melt With You", Bowling for Soup did a cover
>>42918272I think you mean shoot.
> ghost armourYour armour dies
>>42921650>Ghost ArmourYou get armor made of ghost. They wail while you try to sleep and weapons pass right through them.
>>42921650>ghost armourArmour disconnects from the IRC server. He wonders how you knew his password.