https://twitter.com/FatguyQM>An alarm signals it’s duty, ringing clearly in the darkness of a small, dark chamber. It does; unceasingly, what it has done every day at it’s designated time with mechanical loyalty. The sound pierces my already beleaguered skull and rings behind my eyes and up through my forehead, penetrating my tentative slumber and waking me from the usual nightmare. I reach out a hand- intent on quelling the quarrellous device, and close my fingers around it’s sleek glassy body. I manipulate its surface in order to quiet the demons without… before they wake the demons within.The room smells like stale woodchips, or maybe old fritos and I can see the dust dancing in front of the old blanket tacked up to my window. I press the button to shut the alarm off. Here is where I would take stock of my surroundings, but I know my “room” inside and out. There’s a pile of silver surfers still hugging against the desk drawer next to my bed, the evidence of a three-or-four week old pizza order actually on the desk next to my bed, and assorted clothes, belts, and other bullshit scattered on the floor. Propped up on the wall in the corner of my bed (probably the most dangerous place to have it) is my claymore- peace tied, but sharpened. Also of note is my computer which shares real-estate with the old pizza box.My head is pounding. I had… that nightmare again. The one I have pretty regularly, like clockwork. But I’m not gonna dwell on it. It’s gonna be around 10:18 in the morning, and I need to be dressed and at the Stop-N-Go in about… twelve minutes? Yeah. That’s fine.Unfortunately I really only have two choices:>Get dressed and go to work>Say ‘Fuck it’ and proceed to not give two shits about my attendance
>>40299770>Get dressed and go to workWelp.
>>40299841>Get Dressed and Go to WorkTime for another day of the bullshit grind. I get up from bed and look for my pants. They’re… still good for another few days. Means another few days without having to talk to my mother, so whatever. I give the computer a sideways look. I could be late and give Slaanesh a quick praise but… fuck it. I’m gonna try to not be late. Again. As usual. The pants at least seem to be getting looser. Probably because I haven’t washed them in a while, not because I’m any less of a fatass. Hah. God damn it. I look around the room for the work shirt and toss it on, specifically NOT neglecting my deoderant. Of course, Allison would've been the one to say something about it.I look at myself in the mirror.>be me>be 6’3” hairy manbearchild>have actual goddamn neckbeard, but at least i can grow a moustache without looking like a pedophile>still a virgin>actually lives in a goddamn toolshed>lolI drag a brush through my hair. It looks… better, but fuck it, we’re not going to a beauty pageant princess, we’re going to work. After that, it’s out door and into the wide open world. The sunlight floods my bespectacled face like fucking woah. I do my best, I mean, I really do, to try to do that whole “waking up” ritual and breathe in the springtime. I feel something small and tickling get sucked into my nose. I kind of FREAK THE FUCK OUT but it’s momentary, yet disgusting. I head back into the shed to blow my nose then leave.I clear the house’s side yard as quick as possible, until I notice all the fucking trash she’s got set out on the porch. Like, fucking, three bags. How do you make three bags of fucking trash in one week? Seriously woman, that’s gross. Not that I do any better, but whatever. If I don’t take it out, I risk a shitstorm when I get back so I may as well bring it down to the curb. After that’s done, I head out on my way to the Stop-N’-Go. Fortunately, it’s only like three blocks.[Part 1/2]
>>40299872 (You)>Get Dressed and Go to WorkWhen I get there, there’s about six cars at pumps (shit), and it looks like… maybe three heads roaming the inside (cocks). Come to think of it, I could still probably bail out… but I’m dead set. I go inside.Huh. You know, I didn’t think I’d regret this when I set off to do the adult thing. I instantly regret this course of action. The familiar feel of the air conditioning blasting the hell out of my face really and fully wakes me up, and that’s when I smell hops. That means a spill. That means it’s still here, and they were waiting on me to clean it up- and THAT means-*The sound of breaking glass immediately deflates the conspiracy theory I’d began to develop against my co-workers.I look around, and see two individuals near the beer in the back, one bobbing head appears to be wearing a trucker’s hat and just watching the alcohol abuse take place. In my corner, (Weighing in at a combined weight of maybe 320 odd pounds) are my two co-workers looking like they just noticed the scene recently. John is coming over, and Allison is still behind the counter.(Part 2/2)>Investigate the disturbance>Hang back, let John take care of it. He’s maybe 5’6” on a tall day, but he’s better with social skills than I am.>Write in.
>>40299919>Investigate the disturbanceExperience I guess.not exactly what you usually do, but today, something feels different.
>>40299945Eh, yeah? I guess? Sure. Why not, I mean, these guys are trashing my store, and I'm a representative. Fuck it.I raise my voice “Hey, what the hell?” I ask coming over to see what’s going on. It looks like two customers (read: dickasses) are just taking bottles out of the fridge and blasting them against the tiled floor. These clowns are just giggling to themselves like they’re high.They’re both white, and look to be in their late teens. It seems like an exaggeratedly delayed reaction when one of them, (who happens to be bald, taller, and probably the more intimidating of the two) looks up at us with a glazed over kind of look.“Sup fat… fat.” he says as John and I take the last few strides to get over there. His buddy has a bottle in his hand, and looked ready to give the ground another draught when I spot John taking the bottle from him.“Fat fat?” I ask, bewildered. I hear John say, “You can’t do that.”I’ve genuinely never heard this level of witticism before. Of course, that’s sarcasm. This snivelling shit though, has some nerve to actually say something like that in public. In real fucking life! Who does that? What kind of brain-dead bath-salts tripping inbred cousin fucking aryan-brotherhood-reject just actually does this kind of shit? I square up my shoulders and think of the best possible come-back I can for this situation.John says, “You’re both gonna have to go.”“Yeah, Bald-o.” I spit out. Fuck. Fuck you, John. You fucked my moment. I’m sure I was going to say something to John, because I looked in that direction, but the moment I did, the goddamn bald kid actually fucking hits me. I guess. I mean, I got knocked flat on my ass, and they both started running.>Get up and get after them, because you've been wanting to get in a real fight since you never had one in high school>Get up and see about your job like a proper employee>Yell at something>Write in
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>40300023Roll 1d20 on the floor, if its >11, the dice gods want you to FITE
>>40300023>Write inCALL THE COPSreport them of this imbeciles and hand over the tape to the authority if they're gone.make your collegue chase the guys, and follow him. Don't go too far away from the shop though, or at least give a note.
>>40300081BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
>>40300081>>40300168>>40300181Don't worry. The time will come.What the fuck? A dice roll? I'm pretty sure that my brain can't actually do that. Oh fuck, great. YOU guys are back. Awesome, because today was going just great. Ugh, whatever. I feel something jabbing into my back."Hey, are you alright man?" John asks. I wave a hand at him dismissively.I get to my feet, my back is soaked with beer- but hey, I'm pretty sure that this will qualify me for getting leave today. I look back, and pull the broken bottom of a beer glass off of my back. I look at it with some abject horror- this thing should've been jamming into... shit, is that where my kidneys are? Jesus fucking christ! There's no blood on it though, and I'm pretty sure I'm not dying right now.I look back out over the scene of the store just in time to hear sirens. I'm sure I wasn't gonna go after those guys, that'd be fucking crazy, right? They were probably high as fuck on PCP or meth or something. Normal people just aren't like that."The manager's out right now, he's probably gonna send you home- but do you mind covering a bit longer till he gets back?" John asks, trying to be as buddy-buddy as he can. It's mildly sickening, but at the same time a little vindicating.>Shrug. You don't really need to stick around. You were assaulted, and pretty sure you can milk some hazard pay out of this.>Duty first. I mean, you hate the stop-n-go and all, but this might wind up on the news. Besides, it'd look good in front of Alison.>Are you fucking kidding, my shirt's fucked. I'm outtie, homes.
>>40300217We shall be hero Anon.
>>40300217>Duty first. I mean, you hate the stop-n-go and all, but this might wind up on the news. Besides, it'd look good in front of Alison.We're not critically wounded, and staying here will give us good PR. We can wait a few minutes.
>>40300217>Shrug. You don't really need to stick around. You were assaulted, and pretty sure you can milk some hazard pay out of this.Besides, we can go home, worship Slannesh as intended and wreck a quest thread or three.
>>40299872>at least i can grow a moustache without looking like a pedophile>Tfw you know that can't be true
>>40300317Tempting. Seriously Tempting. Not to mention that quest threads are blatant cancer.>>40300258>>40300290Alright. I guess. And you're right, I can dig it. I hold up a hand to John. "Don't worry about it. I can stick it out. I'm not sure about a full shift but whatever. Hey bud, think you can get me a shirt from the back?"John nods. "Yeah, man, no problem. Shit- you fell in broken glass, you okay?" he seems to realize with consternation."Yeah, but I'm fine, I guess. Actually- check it out for me?" I turn around."Well that shirt is trash, but you don't seem to be bleeding. Head over to the counter, and I'll clean this up when I get back." John heads off in that direction. It's weird having him as a hop to. I'm not really used to that kind of attitude out of him. Usually he's a shit among toilet-busters.I head over to the counter, Alison seems worried (fukken score!). "Are you okay?" she asks."Yeah, I'm fine." Actually... my face should probably hurt, I'm vaguely aware that I was punched in it. There was the flash of bright white light like I heard described in a couple of books that people have when they get hit in the face. It doesn't feel too bad, nor swollen. No loose teeth. "Better than I've felt in a while, really." I smile. Not showing my teeth though."Okay. Hey, take it easy though, alright?" she asks, and smiles back. It's a nice change compared to yesterday.>Anon, when was the last time you took a shower?I internally cringe remembering it.John gets you that shirt, you're gonna smell like beer all day long, but it should be aight. The police come in to question you and everybody, they get the tapes et al. The people pumping gas still need their service though. It's pretty cool when some white whale of a woman tries to talk to you and a cop interrupts her.>Stay after your boss gets there.>Time to get home and get down with Slannesh's will.>Fuck off and do something else [Write in]
>>40300458>Stay after your boss gets there.For the first time in the career of this work, today seems to be the most manageble or easy day. Better wait until the man is here, and go home while you still get your payment.DOUBLE CHECK is you feel anything hurt or weird. Sit down, focus on your body, start scanning from toe to head, like you've seen in that thread.
>>40300515Yeah, not to mention you guys seem pretty amiable today, but what thread are you talking about? I don't remember it too well. Anyway.Before the big boss-man gets here, I do take a quick jaunt to the restroom to check out my back in a mirror. Doesn't seem to be a scratch though. That's... kind of concerning. MAYBE I'm gonna get super-powers! Hah. Unlikely. It's more probably that I'm finally getting my wizard powers. Internally, I'm shedding a manly tear, I swear.Anyway, by the time I get back the cops have cleared out, and we still have a workload to handle. I get asked, "Do you smell, like... beer or something, or is it just me? (lol)""Yeah, that was because some junkies were tossing bottles down and I fell into it. Sorry. Anyway, anything else we can help you with today?" I say. It feels pretty validating when they seem... what, impressed? Worried? Who cares!When the night-manager, Ashley (no trust me, he's a guy, a head shorter than I am and probably outweighs me) or Ash for short shows up, he's interested in knowing what the fuck precisely happened. John and Alison fill him in mostly on the details. He asks where Justin was, and no-one has any answer for that. Justin's our day-manager."Did you get injured?" Ash asks me.I shake my head and make a tough face. "Nah. I'm fine." So tough."Good to hear it, but I can't let you stay for the rest of your shift."I knit my eyebrows. "What? Why?""Liability." he replies shortly.I hesitate, a side effect of understanding setting in. "Oh.""Yeah. So, we can pay you for the time off- and I've gotta talk with the shop's insurance to find out what to do next.""Okay, yeah." I say.Ash pats me on the shoulder. "Good job today, bud.""Yeah, y-you too." GOD DAMN IT.>Head home, worship Slannesh>Head over to the store, time to pick up some groceries. Fuck, did I even eat today?>Fuck off and do something else [Write in]
>>40300638>Head over to the store, time to pick up some groceries. Fuck, did I even eat today?Being responsible and shit? We're on a roll today! And the day's devotions to Slaanesh will feel all the better when we finally get to them.
>>40300638>Yeah, not to mention you guys seem pretty amiable today, but what thread are you talking about? I don't remember it too well. Anyway.Silly anon, I'm just trying to act in character.>Head over to the store, time to pick up some groceries. Fuck, did I even eat today?Maybe we won't be so grilled by mom today if we do this.
>>40300638How about we follow the trail of chaos, find those shitstains that punched us and fuck their intestines out through their teeth?
>>40300675Yeah, alright. I mean, I haven't done too bad today. I'm still on a roll. And hey, thanks you guys for being awesome today and...>>40300708In character? So, are you fucking with me, or...?>>40300730Oh. I guess I was waiting for you to show up. But I think I'm good on that, so no.Anyway, I thank my boss, and tell Ali and John that I'll see them later. That was the coolest day I'd had together with them, in ever? Maybe they're not so bad. And Alison is a definite qt3.14.I head off. The grocery store is conveniently located, another block out of my way then I have 4 more in order to get home. Maybe Mom won't give me any shit(not).I pick up some assorted shit for the house, bread, milk, and whatever. I could either cook, or get something fast.>Yeah let's not push it.>There's no way I'm cooking something.>Nope, still not cooking anything....I pick up something quick to eat. A little frozen burrito. Okay, maybe two(four). Fuck. Anyway, heading out I spot a newspaper on the stand of papers. It's talking about a huge tanker-fire that they can see from the coast of California. The whole thing is on fire, and they're... I guess worried about it spilling out into the ocean? Whatever.When I finally get home, the door's locked. My keys jangle as I try to get them in the lock. The house seems pretty empty, but the kitchen light is on, and I realize mom's sitting at the table looking over case-work."Hey Mom.""Hey." she says back."How was your day?" I ask, trying to open a friendly line of communication."Bullshit." she says, flipping through some photographs."Ah.""Yours?" she asks."Got punched in the face into some broken glass."She looks up a bit. "You okay?" she asks."Yeah."(Part 1/2)
>>40300886>So, are you fucking with me, or...?What? No!I'm just trying to be engaged in the quest and be productive by trying to act what the character in the quest would normally do(browsing /tg/)
>>40300964post incoming, but fa/tg/uy is actually responding to you in character. he can hear your posts. Anything from the QM is in spoilers.
>>40300981Can he see any images we post?
>>40300886"I heard the Stop-N-Go had someone making a mess, but I didn't know you got assaulted. You're filing a-" I cut her off."Yeah, I filed a police report, mom."She nods. "Good. Do we have tapes?""Yeah, I guess you have everything you need." I shrug, and start putting groceries away."...Are those groceries?" she asks."Well it's not like you picked up milk and bread from the station, did you?" I scold, or try.She just laughs. "Yeah, okay. Not bad. Thanks.""Yeah, no problem." I say."So are you gonna try to get a real job now?" she asks.I roll my eyes. "I have a real job.""You work at a gas-station. Do you know how many gas station clerks I've had to bag up?" she asks."So you're worried about me getting killed?" I ask."No, I'm worried about you being a loser and trying to scare you away with the thought of death." she gives me a flat look. I return it."Yeah, well, how about fuck you, huh?"She smirks. "You're smart enough to make your life into anything you want. But you can't live in your dad's old toolshed forever. What if you meet a girl?"Pfft. Fat chance. "Fat chance." I say."You never know. I liked your dad long enough to have you." she looks back down at her case."You always say he was a worthless loser." I'm not looking for your validation."Doesn't change anything, does it? Anyway. Need to borrow the car?" she asks.I hesitate. I'm really actually angry, and no MOM, I don't want to borrow the car. "No. Goodnight." I say sharply."Night." she says.The toolshed smells like fritos, or maybe old woodchips. It's probably because I haven't cleaned it in a while. I check the paint on my Nurgal Renegade Squad. It's cracking.>inb4 thin your paintsFuck it. May as well throw them in the trash....Yeah I'm not throwing this many minis in the trash.It's not a very productive night for me. I go to a few pornsites (no I'm not telling you which ones) and give Slannesh xer due, it's sleep for me.
>>40300981Fatguy, casanova here.Go to the barber, you're gonna need a shower but trust me it might be worth it.It's gonna spend a day's worth of your willpower, but it's the only way yo increase your uh... "Manapool"
>>40301001You bet your sweet, sweet, candy ass he can.
>>40301010Haha, real funny. I'll take a shower in the morning.Everyone knows that fa/tg/uys can't see spoilers. Keep that in mind.
>>40301024oh oh oh OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>>40300981>>40301007Wait what?Oh boy. Well then.let's change some guy's life, shall we?No wait. You probably heard words like this like a thousands time before.but isn't this intresting? Your life's suddenly turned a new corner of unexpected... uh... stuff?
>>40301007Fatguy, do you know anything about programming?
>>40301055>>40301082>>40301089I'm not going to get to sleep any time soon, am I? One day, I'm going to go to therapy and get rid of you fuckers.
>>40301129But we can help. You just need to follow us, no law breaking involved!Ever thought of yourself... With Allison?
ITT: a bunch of minor chaos daemons are summoned by a latent psyker to help a brutha out
>>40301212>a bunch of minor chaos daemonsA bunch of minor chaos demons would be WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY more harmful that how this thread's been going.
>>40301129Why do you not just kill yourself today knowing what you could and will completely fuck up like you always do tomorrow?
>>40301129Oh fuck these guys, Hey you're not getting any sleep tonight. You know your neighbor? Let's go beat them to death and fuck their daughter. That sounds like fun.
>>40301129There is no escape.As for your next move, pic related.
>>40301236>>40301233>Khorne and Nurgle defense force engagedRemember young fatguy, the Emperor only wanted you to be you, so be the best you that you can be
>>40301304Whatever, he's gotta get his dick wet sometime, and it's obviously not going to be by any legitimate means.
>>40301339What are you implying?Maybe if he got rid of the neckbeard, lost 40 pounds and took a shower daily he'd do it.It's not that hard, depressive people can manage it.And Psycho Quest was shit, admit it
>>40301377Who gives a fuck about Psycho Quest? I just wanna see it happen.
>>40301007>The seas surge and churn with white foam underneath great carriers and vessels of war, the skies themselves part for before man's fury and the tide of war. A great shroud of white smoke, can I see on the horizon. I'm watching this happen, and the mist rolls over foreign lands. Men in funny-looking clothes holding spears stand on the beach, ready to turn the tide back. They don't. The fog overtakes them, and they reduce to skeletal forms. They seem to turn, and walk with the mist.>Come and see.My alarm rings again. It's always gonna do that, isn't it? Today's Friday. I mean, I had a partial day off, so that was pretty cool. Haha, wow, I'm way too asleep for this kind of internal monologue. As I thnk this, I'm sitting up in my bed, groaning.>>40301156That's... a hell of a thought for just having woken up. You guys actually want to help me with Allie? I mean... Okay, cool. Did one of you guys ask me about programming last night? I obviously don't know anything about programming. You guys should know this.The alarm is still going, but uuugh. I turn it off and start by putting on socks first. Jeans next, and... new work shirt, I guess? Shit. I have to take a shower. That means going into the house. That means PROBABLY talking to mom again. She doesn't start her shift until later, anyway.>>40301304Hahaha>>40301339Yeah, right.>>40301377h-hey. >>40301416I've never even read Psycho Quest.I begin building a list of things I don't want to do in my head.>Get out of bed>Go to work>Talk to Mom>Take a showerWell, take a shower is lowest on that... so fuck it.>>40301231Do what?>>40301233>>40301239Haha, yeah, I wish->>40301236How about no to every bit of that?I head out of the shed and into the house... shirtless, because fuck it. During the journey, I really take a moment to reflect on how totally conceited I am.http://pastebin.com/bDCkH98y
>>40301432Nice sheet, I guess we can work with this and help you with this quest to get the princess.
>>40301432You have a claymore!?Bet the girl would love to see your sweet moves with it.
>>40301584Silly anons, girls like bards, not martials.
>>40301432>>40301530Uh... thanks. I guess.>>40301584I am never showing a woman I'm interested in my sword. That's like... a guaranteed defence strategy for my virginity.On the way there, I also realize that I have to be at work in about eight minutes. Welp. That's not a thing that's happening in this or any other universe. But better to show up to work clean, than to not do so. I consider shaving my beard, but I don't wanna clog the sink again right now. Mom would have my head.Still, I get up and out pretty quickly. The day seems normal. I could probably find a barber later. I've never thought about that before. And it's really weird that my schizoid hallucinations are suggesting... positive things.When I spot work, it looks like it's not as busy as it was yesterday. Maybe I won't get punched in the face again. That'd be cool. And I smell a lot better, hopefully Allison's stuck on checkout today. Wow. I just realized that I feel really confident right now.Okay, yeah! Let's do this bad thing. I pick up a newspaper on the way in the doors. On the front cover, it looks like the tanker went and blew up. Apparently there's theories that it was terrorists who blew the thing to smitherines. Or maybe the Russians. Anybody smart though would probably think it's another Operation Northwoods.Anyway, looking up I see it's only John at the counter. Shit."Hey, John." I say coming over in as friendly a way as I can."Sup." he says, quickly bobbing his chin to indicate... something? I don't know. People do things."Not much. His Allie around?" He shakes his head immediately. "Oh well."I go to take my place at the register."Hey, do you mind taking inv for me?" he asks.>Uh, no that's your job. Why the fuck didn't you do it earlier?>I guess. It's not too hard.>I don't even know if I should be here yet. Is Justin in?>Other.
>>40301676>I don't even know if I should be here yet. Is Justin in?haha deflect like a smooth motherfucker
>>40301676>Other:Say yes and playfully (as a joke) say that he'll owe you one. Then ask if Justin is here.Today's a good day, weekend is coming, so be happy
>>40301676>I don't even know if I should be here yet. Is Justin in?ask if they had any more trouble yesterday?
>>40301676Mutter something 'M'hmm yeah sure' and ruminate on your weirdassed dream.
>>40301676>>40301708I approve of this move.>And it's really weird that my schizoid hallucinations are suggesting... positive things.It's hard to knock someone down when they're already flat on their ass. The higher you climb, the further you'll fall.
>>40301752It's the usual weird dream. I mean, they're pretty assorted, but often fucked up. I always blamed it on you guys. I used to think they meant something, but I'm pretty sure that was a serious case of 8th Grader's Syndrome.>>40301708Fuckin' smooth."No." John says.Well shit. "To be honest, I'm still not sure if I've got time off... hazard pay coming in, or whatever. But... yeah, I can do it. But you'll totally owe me one." I say in a joking way.He gives a nod and a smile, "Yeah, absolutely dude." Awesome. Today really IS gonna be a good day. And the weekend is tomorrow, I mean, sure, I work on Saturdays but mom's not in the house on Sunday because of church and work, so that's cool."Say," I ask after having gone of to begin the inventory. "Did you guys get any more trouble after yesterday?""Nah. It was pretty much smooth-sailing after that. How'd everything go for you?"I give the coolest most non-committal shrug of all time. "S'aight.""Cool." he says back. It was totally an unironic 'cool' too, I'm sure of it.After the refreshing discourse, I take inventory because why not. If I get in trouble for it, I get in trouble for it. It's not like there's a manager here to tell me better. Fight the power.The day goes on like molasses through a coffee filter. I was really hoping to use some of this newfound confidence to chat up Allison. She's in her twenties, and cute as a button. A bit meaty, but in all the right places. Long dark hair, and her ponytail and glasses make her look all the cuter for it. Not that I stare or anything. I know better than that. It's just... she's cute, okay?Anyway, everything seems to be going alright until midday when Ash makes his way in."Hey," he says, loud enough to surprise me. I heard the ding when he walked in, but I thought it was a customer."We can talk about hazard pay when you're ready.">Let's do it>Hell yeeeah>Practically free monies(Part 1/2)
>>40301862>Let's do itSure enough boss, let's get this outta the way so we can go back to work
>>40301862Ash takes me back into his office."It's not really the usual term for Hazard pay, but instead it's compensation. But you've got a choice. You can either accept a flat one-fifty for the mess, or take a week off. And there's some stuff that needs to be signed, but that's just really paperwork.">Payday>Week off>Paperwork? What kind of paperwork?
>>40301940>>40301940Wait, before we decide, how much money do we have again?
>>40301940>Paperwork? What kind of paperwork?Take the dosh. Unless that week is paid time off.
>>40301971Exactly 239.62... but you've got about 80 due on your credit card.
>>40301986>>40301998Interesting.But hey anon, if he has some cash and gets week off he can work on other stuff.It's easier to start new projects when you have lots of time, so you later get used to them on your regular schedule
>>40302027...Wow. You guys are really serious about helping me out. Okay!>>40301986Hey yeah,"Two questions, one- is the time off paid?""No." Ash folds his arms. Damn."Okay... and what kind of paper work am I signing?"Ash gives a noncommittal shrug, ensuring me that it's probably not a big deal. "Just saying you're not gonna try to pursue legal action on the store or anything stupid like that.Why would you pursue action against the store though? I mean... could you even do that?
>>40302056Well you could, specially this being the US of A. But it's not advisable, really.I'm not a lawyer and I'm guessing if I asked my wife she'd laugh at me. Sorry
>>40302056Could you? Do you know a lawyer?It's probably not worth the effort, unless we have reason to suspect negligence on their part.
>>40302084How could you have a wife? You're a figment of my addled mind. I mean, it's kind of funny thinking about it. Kind of like "Everyone is John". I wonder if I could make some kind of homebrew out of it or something for /tg/.Doubtful."Alright." I say. "I'll take...">>40302161"...Why would you think I'd take legal action?"Ash groans, and leans back in his chair. "Well... I'll be honest with you. I trust you not to be a dumbass with it though. I found out from my boss that this store's insurance wasn't up to date as of yesterday. So I mean, you could make a case- but you wouldn't get anything out of it. It would all be down the drain thanks to legal fees. And I mean, the insurance policy is fixed now, but it's not covering yesterday because of what happened, so everything's gotta come out of the store pocket. I'm working with my boss to get it all straightened out.""Oh.."If I were to try something like that, it would probably knock the store under. It's been struggling financially, god knows Ash moans about it all of the time. And... I actually have the ability. Not to mention that a hundred and fifty seems... kind of small for personal damages. But was it the store's fault? Or did they just not provide adequate security? Did they need to? I mean, it's not like I'm a lawyer.>Take the money>Take the week off, you don't have any real bills anyway>Threaten your boss, try to get more dosh/paid time off.
>>40302255>Take the money200 odd dollars is easy to burn in a week of doing random shit if you're not careful. Better to slowly spend it in what little spare time we have rather than find that we're broke three days in.
>>40302255>How could you have a wife?I'm not on your mind 24/7 kid, even celestial helpdesk attendants need a life>Take the week off, you don't have any real bills anywayTime to work on self improvement.You don't wanna ruin the store, Allison and John also work and depend on it, plus you're not a dick.
Fuck paperwork, you've earned a week off. Let's go to a strip club Anon.
>>40302255 >Threaten your boss, try to get more dosh/paid time off.You have something hanging over their head now. Let's get what we want out of this.
>>40302296You do have a point we could burn it all, but it's gonna add up to ~320 soon. I don't think anyone can burn that in a week without any bills, can they? Jesus christ they can
>>40302255>Personal damagesDidn't even draw blood. FOR THE BLOOD GODNo signs of a head injury ASIDE FROM USIt's honestly nice that they're offering anything, and blackmailing them for more seems like a total dick move.So be a bro. Be cool to people and people we be cool to you.
>>40302340I've gotta agree with 'Id' here, as stupid as that name is. You gotta do you, forget about what Mr. Rodgers and the rest of the cutesy celestial choir says. Pull your dick out and slap it on the fucking table. Yeah. He'd like that. Dominance.
>>40302386Yeah and once the chick learns you almost got everyone on the unemployement wagon she'll get really moist.Just no mate
>>40302411>Yeah and once the chick learns you almost got everyone on the unemployement wagon she'll get really moist.> Implying she'll sleep with a white knight
>>40302386ACTUALLY DO IT, FAGGOT.
>>40302433>not getting people unemployed and ruining a business over greed is being a white knightNo that's called basic human decency.
>>40302346Isn't it either the money or the time off? So if we take the week off, we're stuck with $200.
>>40302455Damn why you gotta come at me with logic 'n shit?
>>40302296>>40302299>>40302301>>40302340>>40302346>>40302373>>40302411I'm conflicted you guys. Fuck it, I'm gonna take the money. Plus, I don't really wanna miss a chance to talk to Allison. I mean, hey, if YOU guys think I have a shot maybe I actually do?>>40302386Are you being literal? Because I have the strangest feeling that you're being literal. I'm not gonna do that.A fa/tg/uy will do anything if he's overwhelmed by his own psyche. We know this from experience."I'll take the hundred and fifty." I say."Cool." Ash nods his head, and hands me some paperwork. "Just sign this here, and it'll come in with your next paycheck.I give a shrug. It's a nice little bonus. The paperwork doesn't look daunting, just a couple of paragraphs about how I'm agreeing to not hold the store responsible for what happened.After signing, Ash and I shake hands. I leave him in his office and head out to the store. There's a couple of customers in a line. I take a register, and say "I can help you over here."The daily back and forth is back. I've always been bad at it with customers. "Did you hear about that boat?" a man asks me."Yeah," I force a wince. "Real bad."He nods in agreement. "The whole crew was stuck on that ship. Fucking terrorists.""Or Russians." I joke.He glares at me."...So your total comes up to thirteen thirty-six (so close!).""Thanks." he says, and takes his goods.After the day's done, it's late in the afternoon. Allison didn't show up at all, but Ash says she called in, so... whatever.I feel at loose ends.>Go home, praise Slannesh,>Find a barber.>...I've never been to a stripclub.>Fuck off and do something else.
>>40302528>Find a barber.A good barber can fix a lot, man.
>>40302528>HAIRCUT IS GO
>>40302560we're gonna get mugged
Rolled 3 (1d20)>>40302528Rolling for barbercut
>>40302751Thank god we don't roll for the NPCs' actions
>>40302560>>40302621Yeah fuck it. Ladies respect a well groomed man, right? I think they do anyway.>>40302751I really hope the barber rolls higher than you.>>40302622Pfft. Doubt it. Who's gonna do that in the middle of the daylight in Boston Massachusetts? Anyway. I start heading off. I could... probably call mom and ask for a ride. It would be better to walk, honestly. I walk everywhere. Sometimes for hours at a time. I've never been able to get rid of this gut, or trim. Hell, even when I was really into hiking and kept hitting the gym. Never happened. Oh well.I check my phone for two things. First, I check my bank and find- OH YEAH. It's payday! I've got 558.51 in the bank right now. Fukken' cash! Next, and mind you I'm still on the sidewalk, I look up a barber shop. There's one in the city... that's... maybe a half an hour's walk from here, but it'll be alright. Or maybe I can hail a cab?Nah. Let's walk.Down the street I see a homeless man with a cardboard sign. He's chilling out at a stoplight, trying to get some cash. Fortunately he's on the other side of the street from me. When I get to an intersection, it's a four-way. The traffic goes across, and I need to wait to get to where I need to go."Hey!" I hear. I don't think it's for me, so I bury my nose in my phone."Hey you! Big guy!" A big guy for you, maybe. Still. I look up and around. It's the homeless guy. He looks like he's trying to wave me down. He cups his hands over his mouth and shouts over the traffic."The white horse rides, friend! It's the end of days!"Yeah, no, that's not what he actually said. Is it?"We are all sinners and all sinners will be baptised in blood and fire!" I'm pretty sure that I got that right.Under my breath I ask "What the fuck?"The lights change. Traffic now goes between me and the homeless guy.>Keep calm, and carry on>Try to interrogate the homeless guy when I can see him again>Other
>>40302796>Keep calm, and carry onNot going to shout at homeless guys from across the street.
>>40302796>OtherJust keep walking (slowly) but look to see if he'll be there when the traffic passes...then we decide how to act. Poor crazy guy>>40302796>I've never been able to get rid of this gut, or trim. Hell, even when I was really into hiking and kept hitting the gym. Never happened. Oh well.Problem is the meals, you gotta eat good to git gud.Try decreasing carbs from your diet, and do some heavy lifting. You may not lose much weight, but if you put on some extra muscle you can look like one of those beefy lumberjack guys.
>>40302874Go home /fit/
>>40302796>Try to interrogate the homeless guy when I can see him againNo need to go overboard with this, just friendly chat him up. You could be the chosen one.
>>40302889Man, I used to be 300 pounds and I'm 180 now after starting a bulk. I didn't even browse /fit/, they're hacks half the time.
>>40302905This. We want to know what the crazy man has to say.
>>40302916Missed my middle line, dropped to 160, and now 180
>>40302796A mad prophet across the shore of a metal sea.A vision of the future? Of your future, perhaps?If the end of days is upon us, what would you do to avert it? May as well have a nice haircut for your blood-and-fire baptism.Thank the man for his warning, and carry on.
>>40302874Yeah, I was able to bulk up a bit, but I couldn't actually lose weight or gut, even when I was hitting up /fit/. All I did was gain it.>>40302865Yeah, no. I'm not buying into this guy's crazy. I deal with enough crazy customers.I keep walk->>40302923Shit. Yeah, I'm curious too. But is it worth it? He might stab me.The traffic is still going. I could walk across now. I could just do it. Wouldn't be a problem. I stare at the picture of the walking man. C'mon legs. Get to it.The walking man turns into a hand.I look back over. The crazy guy's still there.Okay guys, since you're being so helpful- what do?
>>40302969Just make small talk with him and see what he has to say. We could even give him a couple of dollars, we just got extra money.
>>40302969>wat doGive him a bit of cash, not much but some.Be a gent, talk to him a bit> All I did was gain it.You fell for the GOMAD troll didn't you?We're gonna have to teach you about the marvels of cooking (trust me this is gonna be good)
>>40302969You should know from experience, boy.True wisdom is found in madness.
>>40302969This is the future you, big guy
>>40303111You. I like you.
>>40303024>>40303049>>40303111I mean... I've got a couple dollars.>>40303163>>40303164Okay. Okay, yeah. Let's do this. I can talk to somebody. I can talk to a homeless person. People do that all of the time, right?Okay. Let's do this.I cross the street over to the homeless guy. He looks at me, kind of hopeful. I don't actually own a wallet, but I've got some cash in my back pocket. Three bucks and some change.His sign says... that's weird. I thought it said something else for a moment. It says, "Trying to get to Virginia, can't afford bus fare. Please help. God bless." He shakes like a junkie. Yeah right. WHATEVER. I can do this. I've been punched by better junkies than you, bub."H-hello."He gives me a nod. "Hello sir. Can you spare a couple dollars? Even change would help." His voice is scratchy."Yeah. Listen, what was that stuff you said earlier?"His eyebrows knit and he seems to be processing what I just said. It takes a little bit of effort on his part, it seems. "I'm sorry, I don't remember you. We've... we've met, right?"Now I'm confused. No way I just imagined all that. Did I? Brain-daemons, did I imagine that? Fuck. I don't know."You were" I hesitate a moment "yelling to me from across the street, right?"He shakes his head. "Wasn't me. Sorry." He looks down at my hand which is in my pocket. It reminds me that I was going to give him something but-"You're sure you don't remember what you said?" I ask.He laughs a bit, "I'm getting old, I coulda said something, maybe. Yeah. It wasn't important though, I forgot about it." He scratches behind his ear...."Alright." I say. "Here you go." I give him the cash I had and get out of there. To the barbers, I guess?>Do something else [Going to the barbers unless we get another suggestion]
>>40303389Nothing creepy at all with the hobo stuff, let's think of that later.>Go to barbersMeanwhile, consider courses of action.You could learn some new skill maybe?Think up one practical (maybe cooking) and one professional would be a good start.What areas of knowledge do you like better, in humanities and sciences?And you're not escaping workout while Julius is here, you're gonna be the biggest, baddest bear this side of town. No homo
>>40303389Head to the barbers."And I applied my heart to know wisdom, and to know madness and folly: I perceived that this also was a striving after wind."
>>40303389Hey is that a mask?I hadn't noticed you were wearing oneWhy the colour though?I mean I'd figure you'd like a black or white mask betterwhy yellow
>>40303514Haha, yeah, no... definitely nothing creepy (are you fucking insane) with that shit. Either way, for now let's file it away. You're right. And... aside from that, I didn't expect the career day quiz to hit so hard but okay.>>40303640Haha, very funny. Go back to CarcosaSciences, I guess. Because I'm a pretty traditional misanthrope.And skills? Cooking would be good. I'd love to own a store though. Like, a game-store. Or maybe restraunt/game store. I hate the idea of people getting their greasy hands on the merchandise though, but it could be themed and-I'll sperg out later. For right now, I think I'll just keep treading on. The thought of getting in any more weird encounters isn't exactly what I'm looking to do right now anyway.So let's see- I need to go left. That means crossing the street again, right?I navigate the city and wind up at the barber's shop. I've never been in one of these before. I mean, I've had my hair cut, but this place is sold as an old-fashioned give you a nice shave kind of place. That's what I had in mind, right?I begin to realize that the usual visitors of this shop aren't folks of my demographic. Not that I'm racist! I'm just worried that......everything"Hello." I say to a man wearing an apron. He's older, black, and bald. He has a smile."Hey, son- how can I help you?" Maybe sixty."Well. I uh... I look terrible. Can you help me with that?" I ask, kind of a joke. ONLY KIND OF.He gives me a grin though, and says "You betcha. Why don't you come 'round, and have a seat? Any ideas on what you want?" I have the good graces not to ask how much it's gonna cost. And I know if I say 'hit me up fam' I'm gonna get kicked out and laughed at."Whatever you think would look good.""Alright, I gotcha. Lemme take care of this, you just sit back and relax."As I'm leaving, I think I finally lost weight... from my hair/beard.It cost about $40. I didn't expect that. 518.51>Now what?
>>40303766Looking good, man!Listen, seriously, we're all here to help you, apart from fucking Steve over there. We're you, after all, and we want to fucking win this game of life.So, please, can we get stronk? We'll help you, if you want. We can provide the motivation, the sheer willpower to win.How about it?
>>40303766Check self in mirror.
>>40303766First things first: what kind of cut did he give you? Please send us mental images of your current hairstyle.
>>40303766Check cut and beard firstThen how about we go home, do some exercises and browse for cooking recipes. Or maybe ask mom, does she know how to cook?If she does it could be a nice experience, maybe she'll give you less shit if she sees you trying to cook
>>40303842>>40303827>>40303817Hey hey, other voices, we need to present a united front. I'm thinking, let's head down to that really nice gym near us (not the fucking LA fitness), and see if we can get one of those heavy /fit/ guys to help us out.
>>40303870>>40303766But can we afford it?If it fits our monthly expenses I'm okay with it.I think he doesn't need to thin down, but if he loses just a bit his muscle will show and be damn sure this nigga will look sexy in a bane costume
>>40303870Are you joking? That's absolutely no fun at all. Can we go back and run the homeless creep through with a claymor- actually...getting fit is right up our alley. Let's do that. The more we can lift the better.
>>40303870Fitness isn't how you get your life together.How about trying to advance at our workplace. Maybe find a better job?Or, perhaps, practice with that claymore to prepare for the END TIMES.I hear they are NIGH.
>>40303870But this is far more important! Before anything else, we must first evaluate the quality of our haircut.
>>40303927Shut the fuck up Steve, you and your psychopathic tendencies. At least you see the merits of fitness.>>40303950That's fair. But we must uphold the haircut with our own swole body!>>40303948>Practicing with claymore, we need to be fit and worthy. Cleganebowl is hype, and we're Clegane motherfuckers.
>>40303948I was actually suggesting both before and now:Mens insana in corpore sanoWork on your spirit, mind and body
>>40303807Uh yeah, sure. But I feel like going to the Gym is wasted effort.>>40303817>>40303827>>40303842>>40303950Uh okay. Also, Mom can't cook worth shit. You guys know that.>>40303870I really don't want to go to a gym.>>40303888Fine.>>40303927Pls don't.>>40303948Yeah apparently.So I guess we're going to the gym. I probably look like a real asshole wandering around with a phone and... this haircut probably looks stupid as hell, I really don't know.There are a couple of gyms around here that are probably worthwhile I guess. If we're putting money into it. I primarily stuck with cardio before trying to tone down, but when I got to lifting weights I bulked like a sommofabitch. Problem was I didn't know the equipment. It was pretty embarrassing. I'm not going back there again.>Hey anon, you know we're all here to help you, right?>Uh, thanks guy?>So listen, you know this machine isn't for your legs, right?>...Never again.I find a gym and head to it. Getting inside, I find a handful of serious people on various machines or at weight benches doing the exercise. There are also some people who seem like they have no idea what they're doing. An older hispanic looking lady whose arms are flopping like bird wings and she's sweating enough to lift an ark.Whatever though. There's a qtFIT at the counter and suddenly I'm pretty sure even my knuckles are sweating."Hello, how can I help you?" she smiles and flashes white teeth at me."Uh... I was... wondering how much um," FUCK WHAT'S THE WORD"How much...?" She refuses to be helpful."How much um... Joining cost is?""You mean membership fees?""Yeah, that." my face goes red."Twenty nine ninety-nine a month, after an initial ninety-nine ninety-nine initiation fee." she smiles."Yeah, okay... that sounds good." I fumble for my card.WORKOUT MONTAGE.I find myself sweaty and disgusting, and there's no way I'm getting naked in front of anyone else right now.>Now what?
>>40304199Good job man, I'm seriously proud of you. You'll feel disgusting for now, but it'll get better. We both read the same /fit/ threads, we know those fat to fit stories. You can do it! And you're already good, just need to get off the fat facade.So, I think you're free for now. I'm gonna stop bothering you, since you deserve a break. Good job. But if you even fucking dare eating any sugary shit I'll set Steve on you.
>>40304199Go home, you need a shower and to browse cooking sites.Also guides on mechanics and electronics, we'll do science since you like thatOh did you remember to do your COMPOUNDS while at the gym, jimbo?
>>40304256...So we're -not- going to run a homeless man through?
>>40304324We don't even own armor. Let's work towards fitting into some, before disemboweling some homeless guy. Fair?
>>40304339We could make our own armor. With bodies. No but seriously, go take a shower you reek.
>>40304256Silly Voice, Fa/tg/uys can't see through spoilers. YOU KNOW WHAT MUST BE DONE NOW.>>40304273Ugh, I really can't do mechanics and shit. I mean, seriously. I'm pretty beat, too. I think I'm just gonna get home, shower, and MAYBE get to bed before I fall asleep. Unless there's some serious incentive around to not do so. Also... Uh. Compounds. Yeah, I totally did... whateverthoseare.>>40304324Nope.Actually, come to think of it you guys- I feel like that's a plan.>Go home and shower then sleep>NO, I NEED TO DO THIS THING [Write In with Prejudice]>Seriously though, when did I last eat again?
>>40304324Why don't you do that to criminals instead? Do you even good aligned psycho?Fuckery aside, there is something afoot, we must help our liege to prepare>>40304199Hey maybe add in to investigate more about that oil rig incident
>>40304384You can take a break. But we won't let up on you! You must keep exercising, and become your idol, Gregor Clegane!
>>40304384>Go home and shower then sleepCompounds man, remember from that /fit/ thread? Benching, squatting, etc
>>40304384You earned rest, but remember:Better career lifeBetter healthBetter appearanceAnd a future relationship
>>40304472Can we add "Survive the END TIMES, which are NIGH" to the end of that list?>>40304397We know something's fishy with that tanker, right? If it was Russians, then we've got a WWIII situation. And that hobo seemed... convincing?>>40304384>shower, slee->NO, I NEED TO DO THIS THINGSolve the mystery of the tanker. Avert (or CAUSE) WWIII.You're the only one who can do it.This is an auspicious day.
Yeah. I think it's time to head home. When I get there, mom's doing her casework thing. I don't want to bother her right now, because I don't really wanna hear her fucking shit just now. That would probably be the worst thing.So straight to the shower, and then to bed. When I finally get to the shed, I collapse all at once on the bed and begin drifting quickly to sleep thinking... that tomorrow's gonna be a good day. I'll talk to Allison. Like, really try to talk to her and connect on a personal level, rather than be a creepy guy in the sideline. With your guys' help, I'm sure that something- maybe not something amazing, but something good- will come out of it.>Come and see>It's raining, in my dream. I can't get away from the rain. It beats down, steady and incessant. It's worse than a hot sun. It's worse than snow. It pummels my skin, and makes it slick. It goes through my clothes. I've never been afraid of water. Water isn't this red.>Come and see>Now I remember I'm hungry. Not just hungry. I don't think I've eaten in a while. Or ever, maybe. I want meat, and bread, and cheese. It's not just a feeling, but I can see it too. I'm in a crowd. The crowd is part of me, but not. They are emaciated and thin, wailing with their hands out and palms up. "Give" they cry.>Come and See>I find myself in a cold place. The blood and flies of my older selves, older lives sloughing off like a dead, shed skin. It's comforting, but causes anxiety. I know that this is freedom. But it is not freedom of burdens. It is freedom of life. I look around in the void, and there I see before me a great black horse. It breathes acrid smoke and...The alarm begins to sound.(Part 1/?)
>>40304605I feel strange. My extremities are numb, and I almost feel drunk. That's how dizzy I am. But at the same time, when I urge myself to get up my limbs move just like they always do. It's like my mind lags behind.I get to my feet, and begin dressing. The alarm is still blaring but it doesn't really bother me. I reach out to take it, and yet I feel it isn't necessary. I'm not sure whether or not it will be later however.I lace up my shoes. Not my sneakers, the old hiking boots. They're in pretty bad shape. I don't know how long I can wear them for, to be honest. It's gonna be something I'll have to take care of later. I have seven minutes to get to work. That's what I want to do, right? Get to work? Yeah. Probably. Of course, half-way through I could probably change my mind. It doesn't really matter.I have everything I need for now... which isn't much.The room may contain more things useful to me however.>Room Inventory:A large collection of W40k knockoffs and some legit GW minisSome ten-thousand or so M:TG cardsMy ClaymoreMy CellphoneSome old hiking gear that doesn't seem like it will last very longThree beltsA good deal of clothing
>>40304750It's saturday and you have a week off don't you?
>>40304782I work on Saturdays, and I took the money. I'm... supposed to get it my next paycheck.
>>40304798Right, I meant the weekend, but I guess it still stands that you work on saturdays.Well assess hygiene, if we're good by our own standards, then take a shower. If we're AMAZING, then we may be able to just go to work.
>>40304750Take cellphone and go to work
>>40304750Wash up, grab phone and head to work.Make a note to get the clothing washed some time, and also check the hiking gear to see if it still works and/or fits.
>>40304750Take the Claymore! You might actually -USE- it today!
>>40304891...to the Stop-N'-Go? That would probably get us fired, if not arrested.
>>40304750The cellphone gets dropped into my pocket. I don't remember if I left it charging, but it's there for what that's worth. I never usually have an opportunity to use it other than checking where I'm going. Somehow though, that just seems insignificant today. There's something off about the day itself. I don't know what it is yet, but there's a distinct feeling of anticipation. Not fear, nor excitement, just... an acknowledgement of something happening. It's not uncomfortable, it just is.I head out regardless. It feels unusual being in my boots. Not bad, or good, just different. Then gain, everything feels at least a little different right now. I don't know what may have caused this. When I get up to the storefront, I see that there are people pumping gas, maybe four. I don't really know, because I don't give it more than a quick glance. There looks to be one customer inside. I don't feel any particular dread like I normally do. I don't really... feel anything.---A blast of air-conditioning greets me at the door. It's cool and dry on my face all at once. It hardly registers. Allison and John are at the counter."Hey chief. I got a favor to ask." John says as I head up to the counter. He waits for my response."Uh... so, anyway- I took care of inventory. Do you mind doing a quick bathroom check?" he asks. I don't say anything, and he waits for a while."Hey, are you okay?" Allison asks. She waits for a while for a response to, but doesn't get one.This... seems odd to me. I don't feel any particular urge to respond, and there's a strange sort of disconnect like I'm watching somebody else ignore my coworkers. I give a small, non-committal "Mmm." sound just to ensure that I still have any agency."...Oh-kay." Allison says.The TV in the corner turns on at John's behest. There's a piece on the news, but it's really difficult to pay attention to. Out of the corner of my eyes, I see the bold word "WAR"(Part 1/2)
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>40305185I summon thee spirits of war, lords of destruction and bringers of pain
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>40305229not with a roll like that
>>40305185John swears, and says something inane about the news. I'm just... present. A customer comes up to my counter asking for assistance. When I don't respond, Allison comes over and says "Sorry, can I help you?""Is he alright?""I'm sure he'll be just fine. How can I help you?" Allison covers.I wonder briefly why I'm insensitate.The customer leaves, and John says "Yo, ground control to major tom, what's going on?" he waves his hand in front of my face. It's an extreme effort to track his hand with my eyes... so I don't. Everything feels slow and heavy."I'm gonna go see if I can find Justin." Allison says."Yeah, good idea." John replies. She goes off, and somehow I've put my coworkers into panic mode.I'm not really sure how.---Justin as it turns out isn't in. Allison brought me a chair, and at their extreme behest, I sat down in it. They would be bothering me otherwise. I don't really feel like being bothered right now. Still, the day goes and goes. I don't really do much. Eventually, the tv goes to static."What the hell?" John asks. Or he says something equally inane. I didn't listen. He tries changing channels, but that doesn't do anything. People are still coming and going for the most part. "What's going on with the TV?" he asks.Allison gets a shrug. "Do you wanna call the cable people?"He nods. "Yeah I guess so. Mind holding down the fort?"She looks at you with concern. "No, it'll be fine."He goes, briefly. Allison sees to a customer in the interim."The phone is dead." he says.Allison shakes my head. "It must be the service box. I'll use my cellphone." She goes to do just that. When she sees the screen, she takes on a look of confusion."No signal... for some reason." she says."Weird." John says."It'll be alright." I say. They both look at me like I grew a third head."What the fuck do you mean, we're all gonna die?" John asks, incensed.I feel a little less dazed.>Write In.
>>40305291Don't be so sure.
>>40305408Check the sky.
>>40305408Check the sky, look for a radio.We need to check the radio
>>40305542I look out the glass windows. It's looking pretty overcast now that I check it."Seriously, that was fucked up dude." John says.Allison just looks scared.She probably should. I mean, they're both gonna die.>>40305562"Have..." I start lazily, "you guys checked the radio?"John gives me a weird look. "I don't think we have a radio."Allison shakes her head. "We have one in the back. For storms and emergencies but...""Go check it?" John asks."Okay. I'll go looking for it." She goes towards the back."Shit." John says, combing his fingers through his hair. "Dude that was fucked up. I can't say it enough. You scared Allison."I look up at him. He must see something there that he doesn't like, because he looks away. "Nice haircut, asshole." So much for being civil with my coworkers.Allison comes back with a portable radio. It gives off static. "It's like this on every channel." she says.I watch behind the both of them, through the glass window, as one of the buildings in the skyline begins to collapse. Isn't that near the police station? If it's noon, my mother's probably going to be right in the middle of that as it goes down."What?" John asks looking at me, then to where I'm looking."Oh shit!" he yells. Allison looks and screeches like an owl.I'm too dazed to try to take a handle on the situation, and I have the distinct sense that if you don't move light right now that things are going to turn out very badly for me. Plus it might be good to get a weapon. It's obvious that all hell is about to break lose.>Start looting here>Head back to the house, see if mom's gun/car is still there or at least pick up the claymore>Write InSystem Rules will be included in a pastebin shortly.
>>40305784Calm them down, specially the chick. Tell them we need to get the hell outta here soon. Make em take1. Water2. Canned Food3. Any survival shit they sell here4. Flashlights5. BatteriesThey need to gather that stuff fast, this might become a target for looters soon.Meanwhile we're gonna try to get the car.>Head back to the house, see if mom's gun/car is still there or at least pick up the claymore
>>40305784>>Start looting here>>Head back to the house, see if mom's gun/car is still there or at least pick up the claymoreListen to that sense, move. Tell John and Allison to grab their stuff and some food and drink and run. Grab the money from the register, some non-perishable food and drink from the shelf (is there a bag somewhere that is better than our backpack at home?) and hurry home for our stuff.
>>40305885>3. Any survival shit they sell here>4. Flashlights>5. BatteriesOh yeah, and this too
>>40305784Hahaha...hahahahahaHAHAHA Well it looks like you'll be using that Claymore today anyway huh?
>>40305784I warned you about those END TIMES, didn't I?
Just writing up the system rules, this will be a moment. Then I will respond. Please keep checking back. Also, if you have any questions, check out my twitter: https://twitter.com/FatguyQM
>>40305885>>40305923>>40305946Rules here: http://pastebin.com/epWbgqY8Any Questions, send me a Twitter message: https://twitter.com/FatguyQMI get up and make my way to the aisles. It's gonna be important to get some stuff. I find batteries, and a few flashlights. Those go in my pockets... as well as a few cans of sardines, or better yet- tuna. We have that. I grab a water bottle as well."What the hell are you doing?" John asks as he manages to pry himself away from the view of watching a building collapse. It sounds like there's a train rumbling in the parking lot."Aren't you supposed to be dying?" I ask instinctively. Fuck."Fuck you!" his voice breaks when he says it."I mean... you both need to keep calm I guess. Grab some shit and... we need to get out of here pretty fast." I manage."Fuck no, hell no- I'm not going anywhere with you! You've been psychotic all day, did... did you do this somehow!?" John's lost it.Allison's started crying. That's a something I don't really have the capacity to worry about right now."Uh. No. Probably not." I say."Fucking Probably?!" he howls over the increasing and deafening sounds of the collapsing building and... rumbling earth?The ground begins to shake. I knock a shelf over (away from myself) and hunker down where I stand.The earth is shaking. What should I do next?>Continue trying to reason with John, I mean, my social skills aren't THAT bad. Though, I am acting super weird.>Continue looting, also leaving the building because fucking earthquake!>Run and use the emergency shut off on the gas pumps. Just in case.>Leave now.>Other: Write In
>>40307003>Shut off the gas pumps.Then reason with Allison and John.Tell them you felt weird because your nightmares, a crazy hobo, and the voices in your head all warned you about how NIGH the END TIMES were.Surely that will help the understand. :^)
>>40307141Yeah, why not. If they take it too bady and attack us we just have to knock them down.
>>40307003>Continue trying to reason with John, I mean, my social skills aren't THAT bad. Though, I am acting super weird.Simple: John, the TV said War. Do you think I cause war? It's probably the fucking russians, we need to get out of here fast.So both of you calm down, and grab stuff if you wanna have a shot at surviving.>Leave
>>40307141Oh come on don't fucking mention voices in the headGuys, what the fuck, just use reasonHow the fuck would we cause WAR
>>40307003Here's a thought: Fuck the others, get what you need, get your weapon, get your shit together and get the fuck out of dodge before more shit collapses on top of you.
>before: hey let's help this guy out and make him more sociable and succesful>shit happens: OOGA BOOGA WE MURDERHOBO NOW, NO TIME TO ARGUE GOTTA KNOCK PEOPLE DOWN, THE VOICES TELL MEHah I knew it
Rolled 2 + 2 (1d6 + 2)>>40307141I run over to emergency shut-off switch and turn it off.>>40307166>>40307176This is harder than it looks, you guys."Listen, John, didn't the TV say something about a war? Do you think I caused a war?""Fuck, I dunno, are you a terrorist?" he asks."Listen," I say, "I'm just acting weird because of my nightmares, a crazy hobo, and the voices in my head who all warned me about how nigh he end times were. Are.""Are you fucking crazy?" John asks."No, but if you don't-" Another tremor begins to rip through the area."If you don't listen to me and start-" the ground shakes more. "fucking paying attention, you're gonna die!"Glass erupts from the windows they were standing near showering the both of them. It doesn't look like it has enough force to do anything more than grace. Allison screams, though. John covers his face."Fuck!" he yells.The tremor subsides.Allison is sobbing in full force, and John is picking glass out of his arm. "Shit, fine. This is obviously out of hand. I'm gonna get some... anything. I don't really know what.""Water, John. You wanna get water." I remind him."Fine." he says, kneeling down to see to Allison and getting none of the shit you need him to get."Are you alright?" he mumbles. She hugs him. Ugh.(Difficulty 7)(Part 1/2)
>>40307589I just rolled Spirit+Leadership in an attempt to coerce them into following along. Unfortunately the difficulty was pretty high. There was still a 33% chance of success, and there will be more opportunities later. Frm now on, when a player requests that a roll is made, I'll make a post with the roll including the action and post the result on the next post. Unless anyone has a better idea. Please spoiler, or send it to twitter.This is getting pretty ridiculous. It doesn't seem like they're gonna be listening. Maybe. Hell, who knows. I might still be able to get across to them. But there is shit that needs to be dealt with right now. I hear a quiet rumbling sound. Not unlike an explosion in the distance, like in one of my video games. Things are getting uncomfortable, and I don't have much protection.We need a bag, and more supplies than what we have now.>Give it another shot with the crybabies>Head home to try to loot>Go somewhere else [To loot possibly? Write in]
>>40307553In a world gone mad, who thrives better than the madman?There's wisdom in madness, boy.
>>40307688>Head home to try to lootScrew it, as we leave just shout at them to seek shelter.Go home get our shit
>>40307688>Head home to try to lootGotta grab that claymore
>>40307688>Give it another shot with the crybabies.Tell them it's time to act rationally. There will be time to cry when you've gotten somewhere safe.Try not to give them the crazy-eyes.
>>40307764>not using the crazy eyesAlso he just got NTRd, they probably held hands!
Rolled 5 + 2 (1d6 + 2)>>40307734>>40307745I gotta get this shit. Seriously, they're driving me nuts. I need some kind of armament or I'm gonna get dead really very fast.>>40307701I'm not crazy. My brain just works and looks like an imageboard, okay?>>40307764>>40307867I don't really feel strongly enough towards or against either of them to glare. "I need you both to act rationally if either of you wants to live. Grab some bags and fill them with food and water, and let's get out of here.John begins standing up with Allison
>>40307959He looks over at me. "Alright. I'm sorry. You're right. Let's go. We can use my car, okay?" Allison's begun to calm down.I'm actually pretty surprised. "Good. Let's hurry up. I don't feel like we have a lot of time." I look back out the open windows and I can hear something off. Screaming and shouting, yeah- I can hear that. The rumbling and the sounds of buildings crumbling- that I can hear too. But it's not what's bothering me. In fact nothing except this sound bothers me. It sounds like a very fast wind, whistling through the city. It's enough to be concerning.They gather up goods, as much water and canned goods as they can, filling up a few milk crates with them. You've got your load as well, as you all head to John's SUV. You all begin to pack things in. Cars had been trying to head down the road, some of them speeding as fast as you can get a car to drive. It had been quiet for a moment, but now there's a handful of other cars coming down the road at ludicrous speed.As you're closing the trunk of the SUV, one of these cars comes to a screeching halt, while two of the others proceed. It's a white sedan, looking a bit older. It's passenger side is facing you, and that window begins to roll down. You have a bad feeling about this.>Get down.>Warn the others.>Other?
>>40308116>Get down.Shout: GET DOWNhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SP5c_MEs9mo
>>40308116They're probably here for gas.Time to sell at a huge markup? They can't get any without us turning the pumps back on...
>>40308116>>Get down.>>Warn the others.
>>40308116>Other?Run for cover. Tell the others to do soGetting down is stupid
Sorry it's short, I had to use the restroom>>40308184Somehow I doubt that they are, and if they want it they're welcome to it.>>40308173>>40308204>>40308215This is no time for dancing, but I do warn the others to "GET DOWN" before ducking behind the car. I'm actually not unhappy that I did, because afterwards I hear small arms discharge.PAP PAP-Glass breaks over my head.PAP PAPPAPFive shots. It's quiet afterwards. I don't hear much until a car door opens. I guess they were aiming at me. Man, it's such a shame that I'm not a grizzly bear of a man or anything, who'd be able to overcome an attacker at close range.Oh wait a second.>Act injured and try to lure the shooter behind the SUV.>Do nothing, allow the shooter to inspect the SUV and potentially get to my friends.>Yell "Faggot" then blitz the motherfucker.
>>40308474>Yell "Faggot" then blitz the motherfucker.Throw something at him to stagger him while we chargeBLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
>>40308474>>Act injured and try to lure the shooter behind the SUV.there's probably more of them
>>40308474>>40308499DO IT FAGGOT
>>40308474>Yell "Faggot" then blitz the motherfucker.Honestly how can we not pick this
Rolled 1, 1 + 4 = 6 (2d6 + 4)>>40308537Yeah. This is definitely the most reasonable course of action, I mean who knows how many...>>40308499>>40308547...BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!"Hey Fag!" I yell. That earns another shot to the top of the SUV, but I use the moment to whip around the back of the vehicle. This can't be good.>>40308699Shit, why did you say something just a minute sooner?There's a guy in a hoodie aiming on me. I do my damndest to try to dodge.
>>40308736*PAP*Hah! He missed! I tackle the cocksucker, and straddle his chest with my knees on his biceps. I'm pretty sure he knocked his head against the concrete, but he's still struggling.>Pummel>Break Neck>Take Gun>Take Gun + Execute>Take Gun + Pistol Whip>Take Gun and aim for the car just in case.
>>40308776>Take Gun and aim for the car just in case.Take gun, stand up and create distance from him, tell him if he moves we blast his head off
>>40308776Grab his gun according to >>40308820But bash his head a bit first, don't want to have him getting to it first.
>>40308865Sure, just don't kill the guy. Yet.
>>40308776Hit him hard with one fist (or, if his hair is long enough, grab his hair and hit his head against the ground, take the gun with the other hand at the same time. Aim for the car, if nothing moves there then pistol whip the guy. Conserve ammo.
>>40308820>>40308865>>40308884>>40308892>>40308776Also check on our squadmates
Rolled 2, 1, 2 + 4 = 9 (3d6 + 4)(Toughness+Body versus Physical Damage: 2)>>40308820It's pretty quick, getting the gun away from him. I smack his head into the ground, sthim him a bit. When I stand up though, I feel a sudden burning from my chest. I look down and notice that I'm bleeding out from my boob. Great. I've been fucking shot."Listen, cocksucker-" Heh, that just kind of popped out. Pretty badass. Ow. "If you move a muscle I'm gonna blow your mind, got it?"Hoodie doesn't move.I look back over at the car."John? Allison? Are you guys still alive?" You call out.It's after a moment, but you hear John shout "Yeah! We're fine!" through a blown out window.">Ask him if there's anybody else?>Just shoot him.>Just shoot into the car indiscriminately.>Check my bullet wound.
>>40308776I'm just wondering here, but what would have been the DC on the "Break Neck" option?
>>40308949>Shout out:Anybody else who's out here shows up now or we kill this guy.Tell John to hold down this guy or tie him up while we check the car
>>40308953It would be a Brawl against the enemy's toughness. This is because he can't really dodge it.>>40309009"John, come get this fucker. Hey, anybody who might be in that car, you better get out now, or I'm gonna blow this sad bitch away!"This may not be the best idea I've ever had, to be honest. It sounds like more cars are coming down the highway. That doesn't bode well.>Get out of sight>Pop a few caps in the car>Shoot the guy>Other
>>40308949>Ask him if there's anybody else?"You have any pallys in that there car i'm just about to shoot indiscriminately into? Speak up!"
>>40309074Get in Js SUV with allison and john, but before shoot the guy's tires so they can't follow
>>40309074Can you quickly see if he has any more ammo on him? then do this >>40309118
>>40309074John's hesitant to get out of the the SUV, but he does. He comes and secures the guy on the ground, probably going off of what he's seen on various police dramas. There's no activity from the car."Check him for ammo. Hey friend, do you have anything worth anything in the car? Any friends?""No." he says firmly."Alright." I say.John speaks up "No ammo. He's got a wallet.""Leave it." I pop a into the front right tire, and it blows."We've gotta go."Now we're all in the vehicle, the asshole's been left loose and I've got a bullet wound. Allison looks shocked to see it, but really I don't care. We've gotta go... so where should I head to, voices?>The Hospital [I am shot afterall]>A grocery store>Walmart>Home [And claymore]>Ask John and Allison for advice>Other
>>40309423>The Hospital [I am shot afterall]It's the only place with medical resources I think, even if it's full or overrun it's our best shot. Haha get it? Aw awful joke.Ask John and Allison if any of them have medical expertise.
>>40309480>>40309423As in first aid, not med school, obviously.
>>40309423>The Hospital [I am shot afterall]
>>40309423Where is the hospital?how close is it to "The Disturbances?" Wouldn't it be safer to go home, where there will almost certainly be a first aid kit?
>>40309423>>40309614This. We cannot kill people efficiently without being bandaged and armed.
>>40308736>>40308776>>40308949>>40309074>>40309423Anon. You make me proud to be the murderous voice in your head.That being said, it's finally time to go kill some folks. You onboard?
>>40309614This is a good question. There's bound to be a dozen or so hospitals dotting the city. But there's also Lemuel Shattuck. It's a bit out of the way. But how can I know that it's going to be clear.>>40309496"Do either of you two have any first aid experience?"Allison shakes her head. John says, "Sorry. No.">>40309614There is a first aid kit at home. Lemuel Shattuck is away from home, unfortunately. And a couple of miles away.The "Disturbances" seem to be in my head. But if you mean the explosions and tremors, it's obvious that's coming from downtown. Thick plumes of smoke are currently rising up to the sky from that direction.With no other suggestion, I'll head that way.Reopening suggestions for this direction because I didn't advise on where the hospital would be.
>>40309850Eh mom is downtown no?Let's head that way then, with a stop to get our stuff or the other way around, whichever
>>40309850Go downtown. There's bound to be stuff we can kill, steal and fuck. Maybe all three.
>>40309850This doesn't bode well, you should pick up anything from your house that you need, then look around for some first aid.On that subject, how is the bullet wound?Oh, also, Tell me about your mother? how is she likely to respond to whatever is happening?
>>40309975Whoa hey now Id, I'm all for some mayhem and murder, but let's go home, get bandaged and get our super awesome claymore and (hopefully) a gun. To make murder easier. Can't murder when you're dead.
>>40309850Our home is just 3 blocks away, go there to grab our stuff (should take 5-10 minutes at the most), then we can go whereever.
>>40310296So, uh, you want us to roll it?
Rolled 4, 6 + 3 = 13 (2d6 + 3)>>40310296like so?
>>40309920>>40309975I'm pretty sure that this may be a mistake, but... well we're in the business of making mistakes today. But I'm not someone who murders indiscriminately, and I don't think my coworkers are going to take lightly to it.>>40310066>>40310152>>40310176I'm sure we can make a stop on the way, right?The bullet wound seems shallow. Small caliber and if I'm guessing... my rib stopped it? Hurts like hell though.My mom's a police detective. She's probably in the middle of whatever's going on. She's most likely dead."I have some things at home that I think might help us out. If my mom's still alive, we can pick up her pistol." "Yeah, sure." John says. "Let's do it. Where do you live?"You wait a moment. "Take a right here, and park at the first house."John swerves to get there. There isn't much traffic going through here, it looks like most people are trying to take the major highways. That's weird. Worst possible place, too.The car stops in front of your house. You head in. Your mother's car isn't there. She's probably got a case of the deads. Looking in the gunsafe, you see she's taken the pistol... AND the shotgun. It's empty here. Your claymore is right where you left it though. You don't know much about first aid, to be honest, but the kit's here. Better than nothing, right?[In order to attempt to heal myself, I need to make a Mind+Medicine roll. This can improve my natural healing rate, effectively doubling it. It's only two points of damage right now though, so we'll just wrap it up. In the future, if you want to increase your healing rate by +1, you need to succeed a rank 3 Hard roll. It'll last for a day.]You get it just in time to, because you can hear more gunshots coming from the street.>Keep checking the house for anything of value.>Head around to the front>Other [Write in]>>40310354>>40310370Sorry guys, I made a mistake. You'd have to request me make the healing roll, and I forgot stuff
>>40310399>Head around to the front
>>40310399So, how about you sneak to a window to peer out of?It might be your Mother.
Sorry guys, I'm back.>>40310430>>40310453Currently I'm in the back shed, but seeing to rectify that quickly. I head quickly to the back door of the house and make my way through it as fast as possible, only to find my very frightened coworkers in my livingroom."What are you both doing here?" I ask, looking through the blinds."We heard gunshots." Allison supplies. Yeah, well. She's gonna have to get used to that, isn't she now? John and Allison seem to be pretty close right now. Weird. They've never been this close before. Out the window, I don't see anything. The gunshots must've not came from a car or mobile source. There might be some people on foot. Everything's really devolved since the building came down.Another tremor begins shaking the place. Everything that could be knocked down already has in this room at least. Except for Me and my workmates. I kneel down and keep a high eye out for anything falling. Allison fails at keeping her footing, and John sits down with her. What a fucking white knight though. It's after that tremor, I feel a somewhat tugging sensation. It comes briefly, and disappears as quickly as it arrived."Why are there earthquakes?!" Allison shrieks in frustration."Shhh," John says. "We don't want anyone to know exactly where we're at."That's hilarious. We're driving a bright red SUV. People who are looking for people know where we're at. But John can totally be incognito over there."Shit." I say."What?" John asks."I forgot my camping stuff. Hang tight in here." I say."Can you leave us with the gun then?" he asks. The way he asks makes it seem like he's suspicious.I look down at the pistol, and check it's ammo... six more shots left.>Leave them the gun.>I'll be back. With the gun. Just hang tight for now.Once we decide that, we'll do all three of these:>Check and see if mom has any .22 ammo for this.>Go get camping supplies.>Raid the fridge.
>>40311004>Actually, how about guys come with me, if those gun shots came from the street then it might be looters>Go get the camping stuff.
>>40311072>>40311004Oh yeah and>Check and see if mom has any .22 ammo for this.
>>40311004>>40311072this is a good idea, but we will actually do all of them.I'm not sure if I'm reading this correctly, but do we suspect that john wants the gun because he thinks you are insane?
>>40311118It's what I think.I was pondering if telling him we "heard something" and that they should run for the car, just so we get rid of them wouldn't be a good idea.Non violent and stops the problem of having them thinking "oh I had to take him down, he was crazy".
>>40311004Kill him. He's fucking your girl. Do it anon. DO IT
>>40311004Get the camping supplies, get your claymore, get the fucking ammo and for the love of everything, keep the gun. You'll need it to shoot the white knight later.
>>40311151Maybe, but I'm not sure we can do much other that be cautious for now.As much as I love the "we are voices that MC can hear" system, it makes me paranoid about which pronoun I should use in suggestions
>>40311198They're lovers anon, you'll either shoot both or neither.I'm hoping for peaceful resolution.
>>40311072And show them my room?>>40311072Okay. Fine."Or... you can come with me. If those gunshots came from down the street, there might be looters. Strength in numbers, right?"John nods. "...Right." he says. Hey, look at that. We made him feel like an awkward dumbass for once.Allison has been pretty much dead-weight this entire time. Maybe she'll redeem herself in an amazing way? Doubtful. For that matter, John's been pretty much worthless too. I mean, he could've backed the car into the shooter- and I wouldn't have gotten shot. Oh well. We regret the things we didn't think of. First we stop by mom's bedroom, and check the drawer under the gun safe for ammo.No such luck.Alright, off to the shed, where I pick up my Gym Bag, Camping Supplies, and Hiking Bag.I've now got a pot, a bedroll, and I can pack these bags full of food and shit. Mostly though, we have perishables. Instant mashed potatoes and cans are good though.>>40311118Huh. Actually, yeah he probably does. He's a shit, but at the same time I can't really blame him.>>40311151It's not a bad idea. I'll keep it in mind. This is, of course, if it comes down to it. I'm a really terrible leader, but you never know. The tugging sensation comes back very briefly. It's just... pulling me somewhere, but I can't decide where.So, we're still set for downtown?>>40311178>>40311198Holy fucking christ Steve, no.(maybe.)Gotta keep in mind the core rules though.Shoot straight,Conserve Ammo,Never cut a deal with a White Knight.Let's roll.>To Downtown>To the Hospital>To a Pawn Shop/Sporting Goods/Gun Shop>Other [Write In]>>40311217The pronouns you use for yourself/others don't matter. It's all good. Fa/tg/uy understands "you" as himself, "he/she/it" as others, and so on. Like you're talking to him. Or you could say "we" to indicate yourself and the voices or yourself and Fa/tg/uy, or all parties involved.
>>40311260>To the HospitalOn the way there, focus on the tugging sensationFeel it, let it's power show you the way, where to?
>>40311260Second that, tugging sensation - also, we're going to need better supplies than we have now. Find a car, raid a place, and get the fuck out of dodge. If you feel that tugging sensation (whatever the fuck that is) along the way, follow it.
>>40311260Now that you aren't bleeding to death, how about you just take stock of the situation?Discuss options with 'The Team'.Also, >>40311297what was that mysterious sensation?
>>40311260I knew that thing about telling them we're bonkers was a bad idea. I mean come on Steve, why did you have to even mention that idiocy?You can pass for normal as long as you don't say you're crazy.
>>40311365Hey, don't blame me for that one, I wanted to just ditch the bastards, not hold their hands like tender lovers. Also he's fucking your girl fatguy.
>>40311389>>40311260He knows that, but Fatguy deserves better than used goods. We'll get him better than used goods.Also, I just realized Fatguy, we don't know your name. What is it?
>>40311297>>40311320>>40311326Yeah. Let's try to figure that shit out. And the hospital looks like a good idea. I look back at my colleagues. They might have an idea of what to do now.>>40311365Woah, I'm not Steve. One of you was steve. That's what one of you said. Fuck, I don't know. Quit trying to confuse me. Moving on.>>40311428Yeah right. You know my name by now. We've got more important things to worry about."Bad enough as it is without being confused..." I mutter.Allison looks suddenly like she's gonna start crying again. Oh come on Allison. [A mental image for you guys]"Listen. I think we need to make it to Lemuel Shattuck." I say."You mean the psych ward?" John asks....Perhaps not the best choice."Yeah. It's gonna have hospital supplies. Plus it's not high security, we might also be able to find some other people holed up there. But I wanted to know if you guys could think of anything, or any place with shit to grab."I look at them. Expectantly.They shake their heads, one after the other."Oh...kay. Awesome." I groan and turn towards the front. "Let's go to the hospital. I got shot, remember?"They follow.I don't know how much longer I can put up with this shit. Fortunately, John knows his way around the neighborhood. It's weird that he'd know where a correctional facility off the top of his head would be. I memorized the location in case of a zombie apocalypse... and... well, this is close enough.>Optional: Ask John about his pastGetting on the road is a hazard enough as it is. Fortunately this SUV has 4-wheel drive and is decent off-road. Navigating the neighborhoods by going through yards is a pain in the ass. We do this when we see a wreck. The first time we got to a fence, John asked "What do we do?""Floor it." I say."Seriously, Spongebob?""Floor it." I repeated.We had to back out of it and find another way around.(Part 1/2)
>>40311601Ask John about his past
>>40311601I didn't mean you were Steve, sorry.It's Dave here.If Bruce comes around and tells you to dress like a Bat, don't do it.
>>40311655Stop making up shit. We don't actually have names.
>>40311674That's what they want you to think
>>40311655MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEAD.>>40311674Thank god. Tripfags are scum.>>40311632"So John, who do you know who went to L.S.?" I ask.He shrugs in the driver's seat. "Well. My brother, actually. He's... probably still there.""Oh. What did he do?" Allison looks back at me as though she expects me to have some grace. I don't."Well, he tried to kill himself." John says."Oh. How?" I ask."Quit!" Allison says.John holds up a hand, "No, it's fine. He tried to kill himself because he's a severe manic depressive personality. We didn't know he wasn't on his meds until he tried to off himself."That was an interesting story, but didn't answer my question. I keep it to myself for now.>>40311601After we get to the hospital (Which was difficult, having had to circumnavigate through several wrecks, and driving FAR around a firefight) we find it in relatively good condition. I haven't felt the tugging sensation, and I haven't been able to recall it. I do, however, have a bad feeling about the hospital. A seriously no good, not awesome feeling.I'm not sure that going inside this hospital is my best bet right now.[Body damage drops to 1, I'm still wounded but it's not affecting me as much.]Still, we came pretty far just to turn back. And we still need to go downtown. My mother might still be there. And I still have to figure out what's with all of this tugging.Wow that didn't come out right.Also, the sky is starting to turn black. It's almost noon.>Investigate the Hospital>Turn Back>Look and see what else is in this area, since there aren't many cars immediately>Check the congested highways for people.
>>40311601>Ask John about his past."I've never really did know much about you guys, so I might as well ask now. Also there isn't much glamour in the life of a shut-in before any of you ask."
>>40311765> Turn backLets not go to the hospital. Tis a silly place. Besides we cannot wholesale murder if we are outnumbered. We're not signing up for that. We like doing the outnumbering. Survival first, murder/pillage second. Remember that.
>>40311765> Tripfags are scum.I find that highly injurious Fatguy...We know that one time you ran a quest about a magical catgirl...>>40311765>Look and see what else is in this area, since there aren't many cars immediately>Investigate the Hospital>Ask them if they want to stay in the car or head elsewhere beforehand tho
>>40311765Look, if you just say "lets turn back" there gonna think you are even crazier than they already do!I personally reckon you should comment that this place bodes ill and that coming here was a mistake, maybe?
>>40311765>Investigate the Hospital
>>40311831I did no such thing. Quests are cancer. See >>40300458And... we're right across the street from an exceptionally large cemetery, so there's that."Listen. I think I want to go and check out the hospital on my own. Do you two want to stay here?" I ask."Do you want to leave me the gun?" John asks. I ponder.>Leave him the gun, take the sword in.>Tell him to sit on the gear shaft and spin>"Nevermind, both of you should come with me."
>>40311980Gear shaft and spin!Gear shaft and spin!Gear shaft and spin!
>>40311980>Leave him the gun, take the sword in.Meh, tell them to scamper off somewhere safe.We're martial anyway. I just want to get rid of them
>>40312047Seconded. Let's get rid of them, but in a more 'blood and guts' sort of way.
>>40312062Jesus christ anon, you want to waste your first kill on them? That's a terrible idea
>>40312023>>40312047>>40312062>>40312096Will you guys quit being blood-thirsty?Fuck it, I'm just giving him the gun."Alright, John. I trust you to keep safe while I go in with..." I look at the sword. "This.""You're the one who wanted to go it alone." John reminds me."Because I don't think this place is safe. I can't say why." I look around at the pitch-black sky."The voices tell you that?" John asks."No but they talk about it." Allison looks at you wide-eyed.John rolls his eyes. "Ugh.""See you guys soon. Stay safe." I say.I turn around and head towards the hospital. I have the strongest feeling that I'm being watched... by something hungry....Or maybe I watch too many zombie movies.I prepare to open the door, and find it locked. Oh. Hell.>Kick in the door [Athletics]>Find another way in [Cunning]>Hidden [Academics]>Find a glass door and break it [Loud, but no challenge]
>>40312256>Find another way in [Cunning]Not as easy a roll, but less noisy.Fatguy, let's make a deal, no more telling people about us? It - will - be used against you, so try to not mention it.
Rolled 1, 1, 3 + 3 = 8 (3d6 + 3)Rolling Investigation + Mind>>40312341Sounds good to me.I just realized that the Investigation roll would be better all around. I'll use that instead.
>>40312256>Hidden [Academics]Is this something I should know about?
Rolled 1, 3 + 3 = 7 (2d6 + 3)Rolling Academics + Mind>>40312378Tough break. I wish I knew jack anything about hospitals, but I can't find an easier way in that would keep me from making a ruckus. But... hrm... What DO I know about hospitals?
>>40312407Well to answer that question, I don't know enough to break into a hospital easily.Looks like we're down to>Kick in the non-glass door [Athletics]>Kick in the glass [Loud af]
>>40312407 we didn't roll well any single time in this quest, top kek, luck hates us >>40312431>Kick in the non-glass door [Athletics]
>>40312407>>40312431Shit.Well, uh, the Obvious solution is to um. Smash the door in with the claymore? Is that any less loud?
>>40312476Do you want to deface our claymore and make it less sharp?Also>>40312431Quick fatguy, who wins in a fight between Beta Ray Bill and Thor?
Rolled 1, 4 + 4 = 9 (2d6 + 4)Rolling Athletics + Body>>40312440Let's do it.I know how to kick in a door, right?>>40312476Nope. So that's our backup plan.I don't get a running start. I read in some guide to manliness or some bullshit that that wouldn't end good. Then again, they said nothing about double-doors either. I'm guessing I don't want to kick the middle part, unless I want to visit a different hospital.I get ready, and try to give it a good solid kick below the lock, putting all of my weight into it.
>>40312510OH FUCK WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS WHILE I'M- Classic or modern? Lady Thor? I'd say against anything but post-Godkiller Thor Beta Ray would win.I actually manage to burst the door open without any incident, and manage not to look stupid in front of my coworkers! Awh yeah! Thanks fat! You actually helped for once.I head in. Fortunately that wasn't... horribly loud. It just echoed down the halls into the bleak stuttering eternity of the madness that this house of horror has surely served...I don't like hospitals.>Check for a pharmacy>Check the rooms for patients>Check the Break Room for goods>Check the Cafeteria for food>Other? [A fire-extinguisher mite b gud.]
>>40312573Pharmacy! The world is coming to an end. Get survival meds, tradeable meds and all the roofies you can carry!
>>40312573What are we even looking for?Why did we come here?I dunno, grab a fire extinguisher? or something?Then the pharmacy.
Rolled 6, 3 + 3 = 12 (2d6 + 3)Rolling Academics to see if I know anything about these medicines.>>40312638>>40312650I came here because someone suggested we go to the hospital when I rolled it around as a basic first place to go. Still, when I proceed down the abandoned halls, I do so with caution. Because haha, fuck this place. I'm expecting a clown, or a zombie, or a zombie clown to pop out of a door any second to offer me a colonoscopy through my nose.Oh, and I have a sword. Allison has seen my sword. Where did my inability to give a fuck go? I miss that. Allison saw the sword. Well fuck. Whatever.I grab a fire extinguisher off of the wall. Just in case. I mean, worst case scenario I have a new bludgeon. It is seriously weird that the place is abandoned. The pipes begin making an uncomfortable groan/clicking sound. It reminds me of the sound of a movie submarine under pressure or some shit. It's not pleasant to hear. Papers and beds are scattered all over the place, apparently having fallen over. The power's out, and so is the generator.But what I really want to know... is where are all the people? I go looking for the pharmacy.Here, I find a bunch of shit! There's pills, pills, for every fucking thing! I'm... not sure if I recognize any of these though.
>>40312767Oh wait, these are antibiotics. And these are steroids, and oh a safe. That's probably where they store the narcotics. It looks like it's coded. I might find the code around here somewhere...Oh. Viagra. Okay, cool. I don't know if that will be handy.Here are some inhalers, and this is ipecac, and these look like insulin refills. Never know when that could come in handy. Oh. Iodine. There's bound to be radiation at some point. Plus that purifies water, right? Fluoroquinolones... It takes out viral infections when you drank something bad, right? Gah. You can't remember. May as well take it too.>Look around for a keycode anywhere [Investigation]>Take the Viagra too. You never know.>Move on to somewhere else?>Head back
>>40312896>Look around for a keycode anywhere [Investigation]>Take the Viagra too. You never know.Good for blood pressure?
Rolled 4, 3, 4 + 3 = 14 (3d6 + 3)Rolling Investigation + Mind>>40313003Viagra's... the opposite of good for blood pressure. At least, that's what I've heard. You know, don't use if you have a heart condition. Let's see if I can find... like an employee code sheet somewhere around here.
>>40313042No man, like, blood pressure in your dick.You ain't getting on this level
>>40313042Just looking around I see something disturbing. There's a shoe sticking out from underneath a desk. I poke my head down, and find a very dead doctor. He's folded quite clearly in half and stowed away underneath this desk. Huh.Of course I check his pocket. Sorry, doc. Cash money, couple of cards, an ID... Eric Warrington, PhD, huh? Sorry bud. There's a hand-written piece of paper also in the wallet. On it, seems to be an alpha-numeric sequence, and that just really seems handy. I head over to the locked fridge when I hear*PIP PIP PIP* coming from the direction I came from....Fuck.>Get in the fridge>Run back to the dumbasses
>>40313101>Run back to the dumbassesGrab something to defend yourself/smash open the door if you're gonna get locked inside this shithole
>>40313101>Run back to the dumbasses
>>40313162There are a few more gunshots, as I run back to the dinguses. But when I get there, it makes sense. The SUV's been overtaken by a horde of the undead.Mkay. Yeah. That totally makes sense. That thing... there.That's a dude shuffling around in an old musty tux. That dude looks like he's seen the bad side of a hundred and fifty or so years, crumbling-nothing-but-bony-ass motherfucker. That dude there looks... actually pretty recently dead. Allie and John are running toward/past you.Yeah. All of this makes sense.All of this is fine.This is not fine at allThe horde of undead starts in my direction. Partially shuffling. Partially running! Haha, awesome. I run like a bitch.===For now, this is where we end our very first prologue thread of Fa/tg/uy quest. We have achieved quite a few things. We got a Self Confidence boost! We saved our Coworkers (At least temporarily!) We tackled a shooter! We handled ourselves like a boss from the beginning all the way to the end.In all, we've earned a grand total of 5 experience points for this session. This will be updated on the sheet. Next time we begin (Which should be next Sunday, but if any changes occur to that schedule they will be posted on the twitter. It may also happen on a Wednesday) we'll allocate those points. For now, rest assured that Fa/tg/uy is finding safety from the looming horde of the dead, and that is where we will pick up.So for the two-three of you who stuck it out, any thoughts?I need to work on how rolling works. I need to better explain the system. Any criticisms? Any tips as well? This is the first time I've ran a quest. I think the gimmick of being internal voices of the MC was enjoyed.
>>40313485I find that you have put a lot of effort into this, and it wasn't wasted. I enjoyed the writing, the wit, the comic banter at the very end. Pretty much all of it.The system is nice, but I figure you can improve it. And it'll be nice to see the other parts of it in action.Oh and don't worry, the thing with fewer people at the end is pretty common.Thanks for running!
>>40313485>>40313563Oh yeah, do you have a tweeter? Just in case.
>>40313586Wait, fuck me, you posted it before...And I made a horrible typeI need meds for my insomnia
>>40313586Just in case anyone needs it againhttps://twitter.com/FatguyQM
>>40313563I appreciate the praise! I gotta say, running this was a lot of fun. I ran out of steam at some point, but I'll be ready with more stamina next time. I'm happy to know that it was enjoyed.>>40313586Hahaha, it's all good.Thank you >>40313629
>>40313485I was a bit late to the party, but I had a blast, OPIll be sure to tune in next time
>>40313764Glad to hear it!
Just got in and read the whole thing.Looking forward to part 2.Part 1?Fuckit