Alright my fellow fa/tg/uys, many moons ago /tg/ found a game system so awful and horrible that it wasn't even playable, missing rules for half of it's mechanics and not making sense for the other half.This game was called the Realms of Atlantasia.I finally managed to track down the rulebook (complete with the 8 page character sheet) and we're going to make a character!
Just skimming through this and giving it a quick, unfair judgement. What on earth is it supposed to offer that dozens of RPGs don't already?It looks like someone played a few CRPGs then discovered D&D, so they loaded up Microsoft Word and said, "Yep, I can make one of these."
>>37590645>mfw I glance at the pdf and its almost five and a half hundred pages long
>>37590746>skip to page 300 just to get an idea>Failure to comply with these rules will result in:>1st offence: 1 season working in Priss-nee-ich's Bacteria Breeding Barn>2nd offence: the loss of your family (whole) and friends (all)>3rd offence: death (usually a very long, drawn out, debilitating disease) I want to see someone sit down and run this game completely seriously and accurate to the lore.Hop to it, OP.
>>37590645So, first thing we need to do is pick our race, which come in the denominations of Human, Elf (many flavors), Dwarf, and Ken- I mean Gnome>HummiesHumans are the shortest to live and the most rash and ignorant of all the races, and get no racial bonus aside from being able to pick any job or class they want, because humans are the jack of all trades.>DorfsDorfs live longer than humans, (200-500 rebirths specifically, no mention of what a rebirth is), and live in the mountains, what a surprise.Dorfs do have class restrictions however, and supposedly make good fighters, the class options for a Dorf is:>Warrior>Priesthood (shaman only(?))>Bard>Spy (because nobody is a better spy than a four foot beard)>Assassin (evil only (???))Dorfs also get the following racial benefits, with no explanation as to what each percent means.>Infra-red vision 120'>Immune to sleep/charm spells 75%>Know the value of a gem/jewel 75%>Know a metal 100%>Manipulate non-magical metal 60% (i'm assuming this means a dorf can bend metal and make swords sans-forge 60% of the time)>Kende- GnomesGnomes are the manlets of Atlantasia and can be max four feet tall, but apparently make up for it by being courageous.Apparently "many gnomes do become thieves because Thieve's Guilds make a lot of money with gnomes on their staff and actively recruit gnomes to join", which is racial nepotism if I've ever seen it.Also all gnomes have ADD and are nomads who live 300 "rebirths".Also they have fucking stupid names, see pic.Gnomes can be>Warrirors>Priesthood (Shaman only (whats with the shamans, guy? Short races too barbaric for organized religion?))>Bard>Thief>Spy ("But they do not make very good spies because they talk too much")>Assassin (Evil only (again with the anti-manlet campaign, just because I'm short doesn't make me an asshole))Cont.
>>37590918Gnomes get the following abilities:>Empathy 85% (so sociopathy 15% of the time I guess)>Green thumb 15% base, +1% per levelSo gnomes are shit at gardening, but that's better than the 0% I assume everybody else gets, this just in, nomadic manlets have a monopoly on the agriculture industry.>Map reading 25% base, +8% per level>Chance for item to appear in pouch (in a crowd) 45%* (see pic)They are literally fucking Kender.To make it better, there's a 7% chance each time you get something from a pouch it's a fucking jewel.That means at least 7% of the population just happens to carry around jewels and rings and shit.What the fuck.The elves get their own post.
>>37590918>200-500 rebirths specifically, no mention of what a rebirth is>There are 5 seasons in 1 rebirth (year).Obviously you're supposed to be familiar with the setting before you buy the book.
>>37591124Ah, of course, I should have known a rebirth was made up of 5 season of a total of 360 cycles (days?), each made up of 20 segments, which is 10 semi-segments, which are each one combat round, it's obvious!>>37590986>ElvesHoo boy, you know how each race just has one denomination so far? Well, elves get multiple.Wanna know how many? Not two, not three, fucking 7 different types of elves. But one thing is shared between all elves, they are high and mighty and think they are the best (except for dragons) and live the longest (except for dragons).>Sun elvesSun elves are the high elves of this world, and to even /be/ one you need to make a social status roll (before you even know what that is or have a value, or even know what dice to use).Since all Sun elves are noble, if you are one you also multiclass into noble automatically.Career choices for Sun elves are the following:>Knight (only for those in the top 10 houses though (what houses?))>Champion (Only if your parents are in the priesthood and you lose noble status)>Priesthood (Only if your parents are in the priesthood and you lose noble status)>Mage (lose noble status>Spy (but don't let the other noble houses know about this! (oh thanks I was planning on telling them))So the only option for a sun elf who wants to be a noble and isn't in the top ten houses is to be a spy? Jesus christ sun elf politics sound like a Shakespearean tragedy.>Moon elves:Moon elves are the warrior caste and aren't anything special.They can be:>Warriors>Champions>Members of the Priesthood>Mages>Bards>Spies>Forest ElvesForest elves are the creatures of the woods (no shit), and can only be druids. But also bards, in a note. And champions, but they have to be a druid too.>Prairie ElvesPrarie elves are the farmers of the nation (no idea how they do that with no gardening skill)Despite being the inbred hicks of the elf race, prairie elves have all the careers moon elves, minus champion. Cont.
>>37591248>Sea elvesSea elves are the navy of the elf military, and can only be sailors, pirate (sailor/thief) or spies.>Mountain elvesMountain elves are elves who got banished and now live as thieves, you can be any type of elf and any of their careers, but now you double class as a thief. In a mountain range, of course.>Shai elvesShai elves are evil elves who hate the elf kingdom and were banished, but instead of pursueing a promising career in mountain pass banditry they founded a nation that has more options for career advancement than any other race or sub race besides human.Shai elves can take the classes listed below:>Warrior>Champion>Priesthood>Mage>Bard>Spy>Thief>AssassinThis is followed by a note that for physical descriptions I need the splat book "Atlantasia: An Atlas of the World" which I don't have.All elves get the following abilities:>Infra-red vision 60'>Immune to sleep/charm spells 100% >Move silently +10%>To hit (with bow) +10%And that's all the races, which one should we chose?
>>37591412All Gnome, all the time.
>>37591412Also, here's the career chart.In addition, each race has attribute modifiers as follows:Human no adjustments Elf +1 - Dexterity; +1 - Wisdom -1 - Strength; -1 - Constitution Dwarf +2 - Strength; +2 - Constitution; +1 - Psychic Defense -2 - Charisma; -1 - Dexterity; -2 - Agility Gnome +2 - Dexterity; +3 - Agility -2 - Strength; -2 - Constitution; -1 - Wisdom
>Bards and Assassins do not mix very well as Assassins prefer the shadows where as Bards must be in the spotlight in order to perform). Right so a bard/assassin that uses their charisma to get close to a target is beyond the imagination of this writer.
>>37591452Righto, we're a gnome and despised by the world because we're a fucking kender.Time to chose our attributes, which areStrengthIntelligenceWisdomDexterityCharismaPsychic Strength>I need 3d10 drop the lowest two for each of theseConstitutionMental QuicknessMental RetentionAgilityMagnetism (yes, you read that right, magnetism)Psychic Defense>and 2d10 drop lowest for each of these
>>37591452Throwing my vote in for a garden gnome.
>>37591657dice+18d10Rolling for the first set of stats
Rolled 8, 1, 9, 8, 6, 5, 9, 6, 4, 3, 4, 2, 8, 10, 8, 9, 2, 3 = 105 (18d10)>>37591813Fuck
>>37591813Gotta put your roll in the email field.
Rolled 2, 8, 7, 2, 1, 7, 6, 1, 10, 3, 5, 4 = 56 (12d10)>>37591856So that's strength 8, intelligence 8, wisdom 9, dexterity 3, charisma 8, psychic 3, before modifiers.
>>37591928And that's constitution 2, mental quickness 7, mental retention 1, agility 6, magnetism 10, psychic defense 5 before modifiers, I think
>>37591856Righto, so our "outer" stats are>Str 7 (9 base, -2 racial)>Int 8>Wis 8 (9 base, -1 racial)>Dex 6 (4 abse, +2 racial)>Cha 10>Psy Str 9>>37591928And our "inner" are>Con 6 (8 base, -2 racial)>Mental Q 7>Mental Ret 7>Agi 9 (6 base, +3 racial)>Magnetism 10 (damn son we the north pole or something)>Psy Def 5>>37591990Anon I think you did it wrong, you roll 3d10 for outer and take the highest roll, and 2d10 for inner and take the highest again.
>>37592048Now we need to chose our career, which impacts our stats.The careers gnomes can have are:Warrior(magical stuff rolls: +35% for armor; +25% for weapon; -20% for items; -40% for ring *) +1 - Strength; +1 - Constitution; +1 - Dexterity -1 - Intelligence; -1 - Wisdom; -1 - Psychic Strength Sailor (magical stuff rolls: -25% for armor; +40% for weapon; +35% for ring; -50% for items *) +1 - Strength; +1 - Constitution; +1 - Dexterity -1 - Intelligence; -1 - Wisdom; -1 - Magnetism Priesthood(magical stuff rolls:-30% for armor;-15% for weapon;+20% for ring;+25% for items *)** +1 - Magnetism; +2 - Psychic Strength; +1 - Psychic Defense -2 - Strength*; -1 - Dexterity; -1 –Agility * Note: the Priesthood of Ta-Khu lose -1 - Intelligence & -1 - Wisdom NOT -2 - Strength ** Note: use the Warrior magical stuff rolls for the Priesthood of Ta-KhuThief (magical stuff rolls: +20% for armor; -15% for weapon; -25% for ring; +20% for items *) +1 - Strength; +1 - Intelligence; +3 - Agility -2 - Constitution; -1 - Wisdom; -2 - Magnetism Assassin (magical stuff rolls: +10% for armor; +40% for weapon; +5% for ring; -55% for items *) +2 -Strength; +1 - Wisdom; +1 –Dexterity -2 - Retention; -2 - Magnetism Spy(magical stuff rolls: +5% for armor; -30% for weapon; +40% for ring; -15% for items *) +2- Intelligence; +1 - Wisdom; +1 - Dexterity -1 - Strength; -1 - Constitution; -1 - Magnetism; -1 - Psychic Strength Bard(magical stuff rolls: +15% for armor; +10% for weapon; -30% for ring; +5% for items <+45% for instrument>) +3 - Charisma; +3 - Magnetism; +1 - Psychic Defense -1 - Strength; -2 - Constitution; -2 - Dexterity; -2 - Psychic Strength
>>37592048Oh, right, yeah. I just took the first number from each set.
>>37592147Also I'm not sure what "magical stuff rolls" means, I think it impacts our chance roll for starting magical items, so lets go with that.
Also apparently we can blame one Alisa Currie for kender.
>>37592147Fuck, I don't know. Go with Bard.
>>37592147>mfw our gnomiest trait, dexterity, is our lowest scorePriesthood, I guess? Magnetism and high charisma will do is good there.. Probably?
>>37592313Righto, we a bard now.Our new attributes are:>Str 6 (+1 damage bonus)>Int 8 (+1 language known)>Wis 8 (+10% on diplomacy)>Dex 4 (No bonus)>Cha 13 (+45% for charm rolls)>Psy Str 7 (x2 spell damage)>Con 4 (No bonus)>Mental Q 7 (+10% on learning rolls)>Mental Ret 7 (+1 to spell roll (memorized or diety granted))>Agi 9 (6 base, +3 racial)>Magnetism 13 (damn son we the north pole or something)>Psy Def 6 (no bonus)Righto, now I need a 1d100 for our social status, this is probably what they meant with the sun elf social roll thing.
>>37592358 here. Voting for bard instead. We shall sing and play them the songs of the glorious Kender people.
>>37592453Oh, and for magnetism we get +40% to attracting ferrous ore
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>37592453Hoping for peasantry
>>37592517Fuck, also for Agi we get +25% to defense rolls and +25% to picking pockets, but we don't need that since shit magically appears in our pockets anyways 45% of the time.>>37592540Sadly no, we are lower middle class, we get -10% to our finance rolls and -5% to our magical stuff rolls.I need seven 1d100s for our finances.
Rolled 30, 27, 16, 64, 9, 53, 11 = 210 (7d100)>>37592578Boy, I love rolling dice.
>>37592650We haven't even got to making our birthday yet.So we get>0 platinum chips>0 gold chips>0 silver chips>5000 copper chips>0 gems>4 jewels worth 500 gold chipsI think that means we're pretty poor.Now I need 4d100 for magic items.
Rolled 17, 17, 84, 49 = 167 (4d100)>>37592722Fucking poorfag.
>>37592722>>37592773It's alright, we can just steal shit with our magic sticky...aura thing.
>>37592773Okay, we got no magic weapon, no magic weapon, and no magic items, however, we do get one ring.2d100 please, lets see what ring we get.
Rolled 49, 83 = 132 (2d100)>>37592882
>>37592900...Wow. We got a ring of silence which, when we wear it, casts a 15 ft. radius of silence around us.I guess that could be useful, somehow?I need 1d4 to determine what type of bard we are.
>>37590645i´ve never been so confused after just reading 10 pagesdo people pay money to play this clusterfuck of a "system"?
>>37592977Mime gnome confirmed.
Rolled 3 (1d4)>>37592977A pretty quiet bard, by the sound of it.
>>37593042Fuck you carlos.Anyway, we can't be a mime because we are an instrumentalist, giving us +15% to charm rolls with our instrument. What is our instrument, by the way?Also I need a 1d100 for our birthday, this is so important it gets a whole page for the calculation.
>>37593115we self fashion a tambourine out of our numerous copper coins
I just did some calculations and assuming one s.s. is six seconds like D&D, one cycle is 20 minutes, meaning the season changes each 26 hours and 40 minutes, except for the chaos season which lasts 13 hours and 20 minutes, meaning a year is roughly 120 hours, or about 5 days.>>37593198>>37593153Oddly enough 5000 copper coins was like, the minimum.
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>37593153>>37593198thirdrolling for birthday
>>37593238We were born on the 64th cycle of the season of Earth, whoo?I need a 1d100 and a type of weapon we are proficient with to determine how good we are with it.
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>37593330proficiency with copper chakram
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>37593330Please be two-handed...
>>37593403You mean throwing anus?
>>37593388Patrick: Hey John, can I be in your game?
>>37593403Okay, so for our one weapon proficiency, since this game is retarded, we actually get a MALUS to our to hit roll.Our to hit roll with our chakram is Base 10%Str bonus +10%Proficiency bonus -3%So our to-hit chance is fuck 17% with the thing we train with daily, and 20% with everything else.Yeah.
>>37593527I need 1d8+1d6 for our starting health, because that makes sense, right?We're almost done falks.Almost.
>>37593388>i-it´s not a mary sue dmpc guys, look it´s in the book
Rolled 3 (1d8)>>37593568Reminds me of that time I wanted to create the worst RPG in the world.
Rolled 5 + 1 (1d8 + 1)>>37593568soon the copper bard will be bornhis cacophonous melodies will be heard all over nowhere cause he has a ring of silence
Rolled 2 (1d6)>>37593568>>37593648
>>37593388>cannot kill anyone>1% chance to survivelel
>>37593648>>37593714Okay, so we have 5 HP and I don't think that's a lot.I-i think we're done char gen guysWe could buy stuff, but we're so poor we only have copper chips and I cannot find conversion rates at all in this book and I need to go soon.Finally, what is our name and gender? suprisingly we don't need to roll for this
>>37593752He doesn't kill you.Your body's inability to cope with power he bestowed upon you does.
>>37593693>5'1">80 poundsHe's a fucking skinnyfat manlet to boot.
>>37593819and you can be pretty sure that he knows that, so he technically kills you
>>37593813Male, but homosexualnamed Jingles
>>37593930Nothing about it says he's particularly smart, just all powerful.>Psst nothing personnel kid
>>37593970Jinglesrull it is!
>>37593970all gnome names have to end in rull see >>37590918
>>37593973guess that`s fair
>>37593970Alright, we are jingles the homosexual copper-coin playing gnome who makes no sound but plays his music anyway and rolls in bitches.Let's do a random encounter with Jingles before I go, gimmie a 1d14
Rolled 1 (1d4)>>37594057rollan
Rolled 9 (1d14)>>37594057Wait, a D14?
>>37594094>>37594092There's 14 charts, excluding day/nightAnyway, Jinglesrull has found himself in "shallow water" so I guess he's fucking around in a kiddie pool or a fountain looking for money or some shit. Or maybe he's on a riverboat, which makes more sense.I need a 1d100 for the actual encounter
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>37594180rollan
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>37594180
>>37594200>>37594206Jinglesrull is encountering 8-48 rock crabs, gimmie a 1d40 for how many rock crabs.
>>37590645>Realms of AtlantasiaOh shit, hype.
Rolled 33 (1d40)>>37594239
>>37594180Whoa so 1400 different random encounters? Not gonna lie that sounds pretty impressive.>>37593388>Any bard performance can teach you basic info about Par-traxx, including his height, weight, and his staff's height.
Rolled 13 (1d40)
>>37594312>not knowing such minor details about your lordit`s like you`re not even trying
>>37594310So Jinglerull is searching for gold in a fountain, when suddenly he is surrounded by 41 large rocks on legs, with giant fucking pincers.He tries to call for help, but his ring of silence fucks it up.What do?
>>37593388>He's the first Dragon Mage>But wait, he's also actually the Chaos Dragon demigod>But wait, he's also god himself
>>37594411They're only crabs, how hard can they be? Attack!
>>37594411slay 'em with the power of rock n roll!
>>37594467>AttackOkay, gimmie a 1d100+17
>>37594411 Wait! we need to see if his magic stealing aura activates. The crabs might have valuables!
Rolled 2 + 17 (1d100 + 17)>>37594523
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>37594543You're right anon! I forgot! 41 certainly is a crowd!
>>37594570Okay, we fail the attack, roll a 1d100 for how bad we miss.Also if one of you wants to reroll the magical stealing aura roll I'm cool with that.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>37594597If we miss hard enough, can we cut off our own heads?
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>37594572 rollan for magic stealing
>>37594645If you roll anywhere from 1-35 you hit yourself and can take up to 3x the base damage of your weapon.As it stands we just hit a hard surface damaging our weapon but hey I don't care about that.Time for the rock crab we just pissed off to roll, I need a 1d100+50 for our defense.
Rolled 26 + 48 (1d100 + 48)>>37594756Fucked up the rolling of the rock crab
Rolled 40 + 50 (1d100 + 50)>>37594756
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>37594800>>37594782The rock crab misses, but lets see how hard!
>>37594756So wait, we can hit ourselves three times as hard as we can hit the enemy?
>>37594826so they attack as one or do we have to roll for every single one?
>>37594840No, after you hit, you roll a location, and after that, you roll precision, which can do anything from 1/4th to x10 weapon damage>>37594826>the rock crab misses so hard it hits itself for x3 damage>Rock crab pincers do 2d20 damageGive me a 2d20, folks.
>>37594859Lets assume they are all crowding around Jinglerull as the biggest one takes him on.
>>37594871>A normal attack can damage up to 8 times our HP and at minimum almost half.>Misses.
Rolled 16, 13 = 29 (2d20)>>37595032Gah, fucked up the roll.
Rolled 9, 11 = 20 (2d20)>>37594871
Rolled 4, 12 = 16 (2d20)>>37594871
>>37595071>29x3>96 damage>rock crab health is max 85The rock crab swings, misses, and bashes it's own claws against it's face with such force that the crabs skull implodes.All the other rock crabs cower in fear of this silent splattering of gore.After a few minutes, a smaller crab moves up to our honosexual homeless bard and offers him a sack, roll 1d100 for the loot.
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>37595140serves em right for messing with the mighty Jinglesrull
>>37595140This game, god. I feel like I'm smoking crack.
>Jinglerull survived combatWe're already doing better than Spider, Dwarf of Steel.
>>37595188Jinglerull pulls out...a flag of wealth™This flag gives us a +30% to finance rolls!...but we already did that at the start of the game.What the fuck, RoA?Either way, I need to go now, this was fun as hell.If you want more stupid shit to look up, ctrl+f "chaos" in the .pdf and find the season of chaos.
>>37595264>the crabs surrendered their flag to Jinglelrull
>>37595315Jinglesrull, the apparently weakly as a blade of grass mute-bard extraordinare, suddenly finds himself in shallow water, surrounded by no less than 41 crabs. They range in size from spawn, to crabs larger than our hero himself! The largest of which is quickly closing in! Striking a combative pose, he shakes his copper coins silently (and menacingly) at the monstrous crab! Blast! There was no effect. The crab raised a mighty claw, prepared to dispatch poor Jinglesruss. But wait! The crab can't hold up it's own massive claw! The crab's shell's outer structure fails, and the crab disentigrates! Amazed and aghast at our hero's display of pure amazing skill, the other 40 crabs all immediately surrender. One lower crab, bearing a scar over its left eye, presents Jinglesrull their Kingdom's flag. Jinglesrull silently accepts the flag, and goes to the local inn to silently jingle them the song of the 5 foot, 80 pound wizard who lives in the mountains. Another successful day of adventuring!