>>37087072>>37087077Is it picture day already? Why, I remember my first picture day. I had this horrid pimple on the end of my nose, and I was wearing magnificent purple and yellow robes.
>>37087107Nobody will complain if i wear a Cloak of Invisibility, right?
>>37087154Kind of defeats the purpose I'd say.
>>37087154No, my personal and office defenses work on body heat, not visuals.
>>37087164Okay fine! What about a Cloak of Displacement?>>37087183I wasn't planning on invading your office, what could it possibly contain.
>>37087107Now it is time to unveil my master plan! I, fryia the crow, have been planning to draw all of you all this time!... but not now since I am busy drawing for work. Maybe later in the evening.
>>37087227I look forward to it!>>37087225Cloak of disgruntledness?
>>37087225As if I'd tell you. I'm not stupid enough to just tell someone about that sort of thing. Though I will say that my defenses are the LEAST of your worries once you enter.
Hey, I've got this portrait here for Anfarthon. Anyone know where he went to?Also, what's going on?
>>37087370aftermath of a brief yet furious fashion battle.
>>37087370He's gone on a quest of self-discovery. I'll take care of that for him in the meantime.Today is apparently portrait day! I don't need one of course, I've had my portrait made already. I'm sure the others would be interested, though.
"What? You guys had a whole meeting with out me?"
>>37087396That's magic for you. So now, who am I to draw first?
>>37087450Noel in pants will be something I savor for eternity.
>>37087454"I didn't know you rolled that way Conspierre."
>>37087469What? I cursed her to wear pants. The look on her face was priceless
>>37087454I' d like to wait until she is around though, I want to ask a brief descrition pf everyone before I draw. So either myself, you, niamal, carn or cromina if she is still around
>>37087450Another pictomancer? Lovely! Well I'll be drawing Soros next, so do as you will.
>>37087259Are you proud of it?Now if you pardon me im going to go find some of my equipment. Anyone seen my cl-Actually, did anyone see a Leather Drum? I infused that with a strong Earth Rune and its a little destructive as resufuckfuckI mean, SOMEONE, not me, made a magical Leather Drum and infused it with a Earth Rune. If you see ANY Leather Drum i'll be needing it.
>>37087154If your lookin' t'cause some mischief like that, at least do somethin' funny wit' it, like leavin' your 'ead uncovered. Or if you're an 'alf-elf, y'could borrow my cloak of 'uman guise. I don't wear it tha' much nowadays, anyways.>>37087227I s'pose I should take extra care in cleanin' my tusks. An' tie my hair back. Would be a good time t'show off my new suit of lamellar. Maybe a cape and a 'at to keep that wizardy sorta look.
>>37087450How about I go first, it seems I missed the last round of pictures.The recently re-resurect... ect. is not a lich and in fact has all of his fleshy parts intact. Looks old, very old, but not that frail. Being a traditionalist at heart he is always in robe and hat. I'll leave any other details up to you.
>>37087478"yes but everyone knows the only men wear pants and women wear dresses."
>>37087479Well, I'm slightly below average height, dirty blonde hair, green eyes, rather skinny, look to be around 25ish, and have a constant wide eyed stare. I generally wear dark gray robes with the hood up in lieu of a hat, and exaggerate most facial expressions.
>>37087479Well, you know what I look like >>37087415.But, if you'd like to know further, I look about 35ish, not quite middle-aged but still a little youthful. Deep tan skin, and brown hair tied into a long braid. I wear hanging robes and simple pauldrons, along with a headpiece to part my hair. Like most current and former residents of Rosetide, I wear no shoes.
>>37087539Understood. Go on with the overtime though!
>>37087479long blonde hair, black sleeveless minidress, yellow eyes, and now pants, plus sour expression because of them
>>37087528>>37087595Excellent, I will be eagerly expecting the outcome then.Oh and please let me have some hair, I realise hiding the hair under the hat or leave him bald would be very easy to do but some proof that he does still have a healthy amount of hair would be nice.
>>37087596"Oh wow, I'm so sorry Noel..."
Oh, new meting!
>>37087595Well now that you mention it, wasn't Mort's sister kidnapped? I feel like we should help him.
>>37087630Wait, when did this happen? What?
>>37087630"Oh oh I'll help! I'm great at helping!"
>>37087630We probably shouldpic related is more or less what james looks like, used my rs char to model
>>37087630>>37087644"I am just the best at helping!"
>>37087643I was hung over and trapped under the floorboards when he mentioned it. A few meetings ago.>>37087644Wait, is Stabby still dead?
>>37087643I'm not sure, but it's been a fact for some time now.
>>37087655i always forget something dammit
>>37087658"People don't normally come back to life, so yes..... Why do you ask?"
>>37087668Speak for yourself. If someone wanted him back then it probably wouldn't be that hard to arrange.
>>37087658>>37087663Well do we know WHERE she is? We need to put a stop to this now that Takarados' meddling is finished and the Great Pantsening is over.
>>37087668I mean he did ask to be resurrected, and he's the most talented rogue we know. And somewhat friendly with Mort. He might be able to help us.
>>37087613 what about a beard and/or mustache?
>>37087683Well there's your problem - no one wants Stabby back.
>>37087686See, that's the problem. Jake'ness the Pyromancer has her in the Northern Barrens.
>>37087479A tall human, blue eyes and brown hair.Leather armor.He has is cursed shortsword(Give it a effect. If you don't know what, then just cover it in a mottled black glow).You're pettry much free after that.Other than that you can give him any other equipment, whatever effect, etc-cera. Remember that if he has any equipment he likes fumbling around with it.
>>37087450Oooh, I know I'm not here often, but let me in on this.Eternally 25 male, with medium hair over the right eye, lean muscle showing through a tight sleeveless shirt's fabric and well fitted dark colored pants with a nice ankle-length waistcloak and workboots. This is all topped by a circlet of bone. Skin color: slightly tan Hair color: auburn Eye color: Yellow Shirt and cloak color: mauve
>>37087707"yeah pretty much."
>>37087686The problem, if I am not mistaken, is not so much where she is as it is who it is that has her. She was kidnapped by Jake'ness.>>37087704I'm torn between something really long or a classic villainous goatee. I'm leaning towards the goatee but I'll let you decide what looks best with the rest of the picture.
>>37087690"Yeah but i mean...... Do you REALLY want stabby back? It wasn't easy killing him last time, and i mean he stole from someone under our protection, so I mean we'd have to try to kill him again... it'd be a whole thing."
>>37087769Maybe bound as shade.
Rolled 20 (1d20)>>37087769nah he wont do anything bad this type, who will be resurrecting him?
>>37087785>Noone's eyes bug out"I..... He's scary. please don't make him scarier."
Muwahaha!How's everyone doing today?
>>37087769Oh that shouldn't be a problem. You see, when one becomes experienced enough in the art of necromancy one learns to leave some way of stopping your creations. I just have to leave a triggered effect that will kill him if necessary.>>37087785Or that, binding him to my will would be interesting...
>>37087804nice roll m8, too bad you didn't get to use it.
>>37087747>>37087711W-well that will certainly be a problem.
>>37087479>>37087721Addendum: Average height, add any bone protrusions you like to show off the fleshwarping.
>>37087747Working on it.I am slow with this kind of things, so be gentle senpai
>>37087823Oh, you know. Fashion wars.
>>37087823Vex! You missed all the fun, it was a free for all prank fight.
Rolled 3839 (1d5000)>>37087835I'm a lucky mage, now let me tip you with some of my hats *tips (roll) hats*
>>37087833".....If you say so, but remember it's stabby."
>>37087859Aw, I would've loved to have been a part of that
>>37087823Chaste and lawful as ever. Apparently Jake'ness has kidnapped Mortimer's sister...
>>37087823...They made me wear pants. I'm still wearing them...
>>37087852Well I'm really liking what you have done so far, good work.
>>37087884Well, you look dashing in them
>>37087884I don't see the problem with pants. You look so nice in them!>>37087852Nice.
>>37087909Shaddup before I toss some water on you.
And do you remember the gold apprentice found in the end of our last meeting, I have already used it to cover our new books with gold-platinum alloy
>>37087884I really thought they would have burned off you by now
>>37087939That gold was for the coffers, Manus!
>>37087931"The problem is that Noel is now a man!"
>>37087909Yes, some are lucky, others get a moustache and a weird hat. I'm not complaining about the moustache, but the spell was apparently supposed to give me a top hat, everyone else ended up in one.I couldn't find a picture of QB in a top hat, many sads were had.
>>37087937Ha! I've got fishnets on today, which grants me water-resistance!But you're still exceptionally cute
>>37087970Did the spell give you that guitar or did you just take it out to fit the mood?
>>37087952maybe next time, there was soo much gold we even made one book completely out of gold, even pages, but writing are made out of depleted uranium for visibility
>>37087931Let's just say the orphanage I was was raised in was rather traditional and leave it like that.
>>37088044"Do you need help removing the pants?"
>>37087995Um... yes, I think so. But with all the spells flying around I can't be sure where it came from.
>>37087985Good thing all my attacks are fire based then.>>37088055No no, no need for that.
>>37088103Ah~ You wouldn't dare!
>>37088103"Are you sure? You seem really unhappy in them."
>>37088055*laughs quietly into his hand*
>>37088103Are you seriously telling me that someone could foil you with a simple ring of Fire Resistance?
>>37088128Remember who you're talking to, Vex.
>>37088154"What's so funny about helping a man out of some pants?"
>>37088195Just make sure you don't interfere when I make my end-of-the-year challenge to your darling lover.
>>37088128Hey Vex, how good at sneaking around are you?
>>37088214About average. I don't put sneakery to much use when hiding my majesty and stunning beauty would be akin to vandalizing a great masterpiece. Let all the weak-willed fools gaze upon my radiance and tremble!
>>37088119Still looks good, I'm really liking the spell effect you added.
>>37088239I'm so glad that my school of magic has so many combat options. This means I'm deadly one way or another.
>>37088239Didn't you take standard mage classes and spells at least?
>>37088210And what challenge would that be?
Good as they come. It could be better.
>>37088210Still aiming for that spot as the best witch? I wish you the best of luck, and with Fryia's experience you are probably going to need it.>>37088288I called Fryia the best witch, I think Vex got jealous.
>>37088294>>37088288Oh, Fryia, when you're all set, I'm challenging you to a duel.
>>37088294Gonna end it quickly and have dinner
>>37088298*grumble* I'm not jelly...Also, these mustache kyubeys are pretty great
>>37088294No complaints from me, I think you did a fine job.
>>37088288I'm guessing it is about who will be head of witchcraft.
>>37088294Well that's amazing. You completed it within some minutes.
arlkin is, well, a half-orc. Grayish-brown skin, small tusks, slight point to his ears, somewhat more muscular build, black, messy hair (possibly done in braided dreadlocks), kinda gruff-looking, etc. Your typical half-orc stuff. Wears leather armor when adventuring or dealing with his fellow guild members, as well as a waist-length cape and a headband, and wields a warhammer in one hand.So, are we goin' t'talk 'bout how Vex kidnapped a witch doctor from my clan while she was in th' middle of treatin' a patient, or is that suddenly not important?
>>37088294 I'm going to imagine that he talks to the skull on his staff now
>>37088328Face it Vex, you're jelly.
>>37088294Looks awesome! I'm definitely not challenging you to a draw-off, because you have the advantage in skill.
>>37088328"People are not jelly vex. All though a peanut butter and humanjelly....."
>>37088349>>37088367 "That goes for you too"
>>37088346Oh yeah. What ever happened to that ooga booga doctor? Did you guys torture or eat her, or what?
>>37088294 that's impressive
Here it is. Got to go now, fellow mages! I will be back in an hour.
>>37088328That they are, but I have run out so I have to go look for, or make, more.
>>37088397I'll be waiting>tries to look intimidating
>>37088397Fan Tastic>>37088404>Is pretty scared of you right now
Alright, so which one of you wants to go next? I have far too much free time and boundless enthusiasm.
>>37088453"What do you mean?"
>>37088459Well Fryia isn't the only pictomancer out here! Were my ethereal scanner not broken, I would match her efforts. Instead, I shall attempt to replicate my usual style on my eponymous tome.
>>37088472"What's a Pictomancer?"
>>37088397Oh boy, save those somewhere!I want to see them all already but im getting sleepy.
>>37088472Oh, do that Jheska woman. I'm still not100% sure what she looked like.
Hey Mages... so they let me in so I guess I'm not on the blacklist anymore. So who do I speak to now to talk about my readmission into the guild?
>>37088397Excellent, you have really captured my likeness.Seriously, awesome work, especially the staff and details on the robe.
What's the point in these threads?
>>37088480Uh, I think it's a sorcerer that divines Scottish people.
>>37088544To have fun
>>37088576I don't like that. Stop it.
>>37088632>Is having so much fun right now"What you gonna do about, faggot?"
>>37088389We sent 'er back t'th' village. I tried t'tell you before you left, leave this stuff t'th' 'alf-orc.
>>37088680Well, did you at least learn whatever it was you wanted to about scar magic, or whatever it was?
>>37088680Heyml Magus Jarlkin, good to see you again. Any news on my reinstatement?
>>37088507Whenever the admissions department gets back in, take it up with them. How'd you get barred from the guild anyhow?Anyways, I'm back everyone.
>>37088672Don't feed the trolls, noone, we are keep them in cages for a reason, you know?
>>37088700>hides the peanuts behind his back"What? I wasn't doing anything...."
>>37087107Why are these threads ramping up in frequency?Also, if you all keep the same names from thread to thread, please don't forget to label it Quest in the subject line next time
>>37088763These aren't Quests. They're Meetings. Just filter that, and you'll be rid of them.
>>37088700Whenever you're ready, Fryia. Just give the word.
>>37088803>>37088700Don't mind me, just taking bets here.
"So.... how is your sex lifes?"
>>37088818>stands next to Conspierre and stealthily drops some coins in his handI would like to put a bet on the challenger, I'm guessing the odds are against her?
>>37088803eh, dinners with the whole family take some time.>>37088818And what the subject you are betting on would be, pierre?
>>37088878Probably. I'm hoping for a dice-roll-off, and my luck is historically bad with them
>>37088878Five to one in favor of Fryia winning.>>37088863None of your business! You wouldn't understand!
>>37088894"I'm an elf, I always understand lewd things!"
>>37088882No prob. I'll be lurking.
>>37088882Oh, I'm not betting. I'm just taking the bets. If you throw this we could make a lot of money
>>37088910>erpgYou haven't updated your list in a while have you?Nor is the vast amount of things you dislike of any concern to us.
>>37088910>erpIts dead, forever, by based admins.You bask into its black glow.
>>37088910Jeez, your screen must have, what, 20 threads at most?
>>3708895520 threads of not shit, yes
>>37088818 >>37088913What are the current odds on the outcome not ending with a yuri scene?
>>37088973Well, congrats, then. I have nothing negative or douchey to say to you. Uh... enjoy not this thread.
>>37088991Hundred to one against a yuri scene between Fryia and Vex
>>37089019Yeah, I don't think it's gonna happen. I'm not opposed to it, but I'm not sure if it'll get to that point.
afraid I will not be able to draw he other members of the guild today, but I will work on it in the next days so worry not, next meeting I will have probably an handful of portaits to show you.
>>37089019>>37089043Dam, those are some of the lowest yuri odds I have ever seen! I must have gotten a really unlucky bingo card this time.
>>37089062Well, I'm excited, take all the time you need>>37089043Doesn't really fit with what's been going on lately
>>37089019... what are you talking about, pierre? I would never betray noel like this!
>>37089062Take your time. Whatever you draw will no doubt be awesome.
>>37089089Yeah, that's why I'm keeping their money.
>>37089069You mean the posts saying it's 99.999% not likely to happen?
>>37088698Uhm... I wasn't in the Mage's Guild for too long but I was the lizard that everyone says had his way with Grand Sorceress Olyra. Of course no one wanted to hear my side of the story and I was booted. She seduced me and threw a hex of suggestion on me, rather unnecessarily might I add, and I'm the victim here. But she's gone I think so no one should be worried about letting me back in.
>>37089135Oh yeah, come on in. Bar's open.
>>37089108Smart guy pierre, smart as always.
"Whoa! Whats with your arm?"
>>37089177I don't know why they'd bet on that, but hey, free money for me.
>>37089216unless they were giving you fake money, or in value that will be zimbabve level in tomorrow
>>37089245Oh, I'll get the money. One way or another, I'll get the money.
>>37089172Oh, wait, really? Huh, well thanks. I don't think we've met, I'm Dramorn, I think I saw you in the Fighter-Wizard Guild meeting.
>>37089216I said the odds of NOT ending with a yuri scene for once. Sadly no money to be made with that outcome for once.
>>37089263You shouldn't tell that to everyone, people who do this..tend to be dead in no time
>>37089208What, mine? Ole Lefty here? Ripped it off a warforged and got it glued on by a Fleshwarper to replace the original that I lost a while ago. It's a long story but that's the short version. You don't even want to know how hard spellswording is with one arm.I've tricked it out over the years. Has a wand of lighting bolt and a whip sword to boot. Trying to upgrade it with an actual arcane cannon and grapple hook.The really cool thing is that I can still cast with it.
>>37089313No one cheats me out of gambling money! That...probably isn't happening now. Damn.
btw, I, while inspired by Fryia's drawing have given a try to painting, that's how I see myself now
I really should've waited to make my challenge until after dinner time.>>37089413Damn!
>>37089509Probably, but you can't always get your timing right.
Ah, family dinner is a yearly tradition here. So I just got back from the graveyard. How is everyone?
>>37089531Not bad. I'm giving Fryia one last pleasant dinner with her family before I dethrone her as Head of Witchcraft in a glorious duel.How are you, Marus?
>>37089559Come again, vex? You are in a world of hurt, don't you know?
>>37089559Oh not so bad, just had a gigantic turkey that I grew especially for today, and visited old dusty family. Now I'm back and I have a headache. So, how are you dueling? Wands at midnight? Witchcraft trivia? Who can find the slimiest frog?
>>37089604Haha! You ready?
>>37089614Always ready to beat megalomaniacs and idiots into the dust.
>>37089606catfight in the mud
>>37089531I'm good, enjoying the moustache I got out of that free for all prank fight we had earlier.>>37089614>>37089635It begins!
>>37089642A true witch never gets dirty. I could wrestle this harlot in the mud and come out without even having to take a shower afterwards
Oh, how extravagant! Finally a meeting I can attend, one again!
>>37089671So the rules are ready?
>>37089635This should be fun. But I've got some stipulations in mind before I spank you. This will be a Bewitching Duel! None of that 1d100 wizarding nonsense you've been domesticated by. We roll 1d666, like true scourges of the arcane. (I'll let you decide before we begin if you want to do sudden death/1-roll or a 2-out-of-3 kind of deal, etc). Highest number enchants the other to submission, and is declared the winner.And so, the winner becomes the new Head of Witchcraft. But, the loser, ah, yes. The loser becomes the winner's apprentice!
>>37089704Sure.... no, wait, what are the rules again?
>>37089715You fight in the mud, who gets out of it without need to take shower wins, easy
>>37089567Haha! Buy me a drink first! What's your name freind? >>37089531Excuse me, am I reading your name tag right? Your a Biomancer? What does that entail?
>>37089707Uhm tempting, Vex. Let the duel begin then. Sudden death, honey. Feel free to do the first move, I shall ruin you regardless.
>>37089743Hello there, might I interest you in additional augments my good sir?
>>37089761Oh silly me, I forgot to wear my nametag.
Rolled 223 (1d666)>>37089732I'm not sure if that's really pertinent to being the best witch. Also, I'd have the advantage in mud wrestling. Because, you know, I live in a fucking swamp.>>37089756Alright, take this, the true power of the most powerful witch!I'm going to be so pissed if this is a low roll
>>37089761Depends, what have ya got? Also I think you dropped your name tag. The name's Dramorn, Dragonborn Primal.
Rolled 610 (1d666)>>37089799Not bad, not bad at all. Let us see what happens then...
>>37089827>>37089799You never stood a chance.
>>37089805Carniflex is mine, I am a humble fleshwarper. I have a full complement of organ enhancements that I can do without any incision at all. I'd suggest the stamina package for a battlemage like you.
>>37089827>Overwhelmed by that admittedly fucking-amazing roll>Collapses on kneesAgh!!! Dammit!
>>37089799>>37089827So Vex is Fryia's apprentice now?
>>37089743What it entails? Well.. If it grows, I deal with it.Also things like fleshwarping and magical potions and such. Really, it's a pretty broad school. You can come look in my lab if you want. I dabble in other things too I guess, but that's not very important.
>>37089848Yes... I admit it. You are the most powerful witch... Mistress.
>>37089852Don't be too hard with yourself, vex. You lost to the best, after all. And now...>power word: Kill!...>tulips spring forth from her hand... just joking, stand up again, Vex.
>>37089852>>37089827Victor: Fryia. >>37089866It would seem so.
>>37089827We should write this victory down in my new book, this will be bestseller for teenagers...and some older men, heh
>>37089892I was actually really worried you were going to kill her off there. Not entirely sure how much you guys like Vex.Oh.. uh. Thank, you.
>>37089877There is no shame in being the apprentice of someone powerful.>>37089892Don't do that, you nearly gave me a heart attack... actually, I'm not sure if I can have heart attacks, but the point still stands.
>>37089921Vex is awesome, I like the drawings, and the witch.
>>37089850Well met 'Warper. Hmm. This is going to sound crazy but I'm looking for something special, I was hoping the Biomancer could help me out, but you might as well. Skin. For my metal arm. Not just any skin, a mimic. The idea came to me in a fevered dream after a wound I got from one got infected bad. A mimic that can copy the texture and colour of my copper scaley hide and wrap around this arm. So every punch is a bite and if I can find a good druid I can Awaken the lil fella and have a partner in crime at all times, maybe even a little mage partner at that.Like I said it's crazy, but you lot seem just the right amount of crazy.Especially you Master Marus. >>37089873
So... wha's goin' on now?I see Friya an' Vex 'ad a duel. Is th' drawin' challenge still goin' on?
>>37089954Sure, here you go. *throws flask with shifting "liquid" inside*
>>37089921Ah, what were you afraid of, vex, I am not the kind of person that kills over the slightest offense... well, I am no more. And I kind of like you... what do you think about working as a teacher?
>>37089921Nah, vex's shenanigans are great
>>37089937Thanks, that means a lot to me>>37089925I suppose it's not totally humiliating, then. I suppose I'll have to learn something from this experience.Also, these stachbeys are starting to get to me. Not bad, Quin.
>>37089970Wait...what. Seriously? What is this? What do I do with it?
>>37089743"Hi i'm Noone! Noone Listless, Liaison to the mages guild from the thieves guild!"
>>37089954Would you be interested in making the mimic OUT of a skin sample of yours? This way, the resonance of your spells would be more in tune with each other.
>>37089999It's a mimic, apply liberally to your arm and you should get the desired result. You have no idea how much random shit I have in my lab.
>>37090000Theives guild huh...I haven't heard of any of you guys holding a meeting. What are the entry requirements?
>>37089972That's good to hear. I'm sorry then for my haste and arrogance. I should have respected your power to begin with.Teaching? I obviously still have much to learn, but I will concede to whatever jobs you require of me, Mistress Fryia.
>>37090028"You have to be a rogue type who steals! most meeting are kept secret because of secret pigs."
>>37089965Vex challenged Fryia for leadership of the Witchcraft Faculty and lost. As per her challenge she is now Fryia's apprentice.>>37089921When I said Vex was my favourite witch in the guild earlier, I meant that in and out of character.>>37089994There is a lot you can learn from Fryia, I learned under her back when I was an apprentice.[spoilers]Same here, I found one and BAM, this works. But there are so few pictures of qb in a moustache so I have to edit most of them myself. This one someone actually made with a moustache though.[/spoilers]
>>37090025>>37090017I was not expecting this level of help...I'm a little taken aback to be honest. Is there a way we could combine the two methods for an optimal result? And would the mimic be able to shift into other items (especially if I Awoke it with the help of a druid) or would it be stuck on "arm".
>>37090088The mimic would be able to shift at its own will, and all I'd have to do is merge that 'liquid' to the skin sample.
>>37090088Well, just drip a few drops of blood in there and it'll adapt to you. After that you can show up in my lab and I'll teach you the control spells if you'd like.
>>37090067Damn. My fingers aren't too sticky but when I'm out and about with my usual lads and lasses I tend to be the Face of the group. I don't what that says about the rest if the group when the burly dragon man with the fake arm is the most charasmatic one in the party.
>>37090000Hey, aren't you the guy who got me roped into helpin' you guys out?You guys owe me. I had to deal with a mad jester, an arcane trickster with a superiority complex, a shifty-ass sorcerer who refused to show his face, and a client who tried to kill us once we brought them the loot.
>>37090082If I'm an apprentice, does that mean I still get to sit in with the council? Or do I have to be one of those little servants busing drinks around the room in the background. Ugh, please don't say the latter.
>>37090055That's perfect, after the recent happenings we are still in dire needs for teachers. You could cover the brewing potions classes in the morning and the eevening classes of daemonology. Or you could take the class of fahion and witchy style, if you prefer.come on, killinf a character? We proud ourselves to be gentlemen and scholars and besides you are funny and good at this thing.>>37090082I resent that opinion of yours, Quin.
Is there still anyone from rogue guild? I need to buy some reliable information
>>37090151"I can honestly say I have no idea what you are talking about!"
>>37090183Don't worry, you still get to come into the meetings, you're just a bit more liable to be pushed around by your faculty head, and everyone can boss you around a bit I guess.
>>37090183Do not be silly and change that nametag, Vex. You are officially a teacher now.
>>37090120>>37090118 Alright gents,>hands back the vial and rolls up sleeveI'm ready when you are.
>>37090190I actually have no experience in summoning demons and similar outsiders. I can teach potions, no problem. And, come on, you've seen my fabulous style. Look no further than Voluptuous, Villainous Vex to teach the youngins how to look fantastic.
>>37090234>Locates a loose scale and draws a few drops of blood, puts both into the flask, then casts the merging spell.There we go. All that's left is to slather the cute little thing on to your arm.
>>37090225Well, the nametag golem is writing out some decidedly uncouth monikers. Uh, this one says "Vex, Teacher's Pet." Uh, there's "Vex, Fryia's Bitch." Oh, and, this one that just says "Elves GTFO".Is this thing even trying?
>>37090120>>37090118Gentlemen, I am in dire need of the live book as they call them, one type of which are made from flesh and second is living plant, they are very....lets say, appreciated on market. Could such masters of their work help me with the books, for the reward of course. The writing in the book will finish one of my scriptorium constructs
>>37090316"That doesn't seem very nice."
>>37090320After you accused me of plagiarism? Hell no.
>>37090316Give it a kick on the leg and it will start working again, it is no like someone cursed him to make only demeaning nametags for you.
>>37090353How about we settle this down, there will be no problems with other authors of fleshwarping, with some monetary compensation and I will get my living books?
"Excuse me, Can someone here validate my parking?"
>>37090370>Punts the golemOh, this one's nice. Student Teacher. I'm learning and instructing. Therefore, more versatile, and more powerful, than either!
>>37090320Sure, I guess, how many do you need?
>>37090394I do not think you understand. I am not haggling here. I am flat out refusing to help you with that. Those books are not to be trifled with, their protectors are fucking nuts and mechanical.
>>37090414Yes, Whatever helps you with that. .. class start tomorrow morning at 8 o'clock. Try not to be too late or too weird on your first time teaching, please.
>>37090425For the start I will need 10 such plants. Over the course of next year the number will be....maybe 300. The payment will be conducted in any precious metal you want
>>37090477Freeform RP, sorta like a quest except we all made our own character. It's sorta fun.We're all in a wizards guild meeting and such, it's gaining popularity on /tg/
>>37090487How many students do we even have around here? I must say I rarely see any apprentices in my neck of the woods. Er... swamp.
>>37090496Why would I need precious metals?>>37090502It varies from week to week with casualty numbers and such.
>>37090471The protectors, who, PETFB?
>>37090502Your class has roughly two hundreds students in it. Brewing is quite a common choice of a course for witches, after all.
>>37090193Musta been some other representative, then.The Thieves Guild still owes me compensation for helpin' them out on that. 'Specially because our client tried to fucking kill us to get out of paying us the reward.>>37090477Basically freeform roleplay where people just talk in-character about wizard guild stuff. We've got similar ones for a thieves guild, a fighters guild, and a druid circle.Also, is Friya still doing the drawing thing?
>>37090531twohundred!!! Oh gosh. Field trips to the swamp for ingredients are going to be tedious.
>>37090502"Oh hello miss.""Hey baby, how you doin?"
>>37090551I just started posting.
>>37090551just start posting, yo!
>>37090518Oh, most of the workers accept only precious metals. I could pay in any coins you would like
>>37090551Make a name and start posting, it's free for all wizard shenanigans with occupational on the fly plots.
>>37090559You two wouldn't happen to be in my potions classes now, would you?
>>37090553You better get good at mass teleport, so ti speak>>37090549 currently on the deadline for an assignment so not now, but next meeting I would have probably come up with an handful of new drawings. You wanna one, just write your description in this thread
>>37090502Enough that we don't really notice when some of them go missing or blow themselves up. Most of the apprentices who join up have a fairly short lifespan.>>37090559Hello to you two, how are my two favourite apprentices doing?
>>37090587Wha? Why'd I need coins?
Apologies for missing the vast bulk of the meeting, i had to root out and discipline a ring of students selling recording of their scryings. What did i miss?
>>37090612"I belive so miss. I look forward to learning from you.""I sure am honey!">>37090649"Good afternoon Sir! I'm doing well, last week I was able to raise a skeleton.""Sup broski!"
>>37090713I lost my big duel with Fryia, and now I'm her apprentice. Also the new potions and fashion instructor>>37090737Well, I've never taught anyone anything before. So don't cause any trouble for me.
>>37090655any currency you would like m8
*walks out of his guildhall shadow*>>37090713Soros!I have something important i need your help with!
Magus Jarlkin! I know you probably don't remember me, I wasn't in the Mage's Guild for too long but I was the lizard that everyone says had his way with Grand Sorceress Olyra. Of course no one wanted to hear my side of the story and I was excommunicated, mostly over fearing her wrath if they didn't support her. She seduced me and altered my mind state, rather unnecessarily might I add, and I'm the victim here. Now that she is gone might you see what can be done about my readmission?
>>37090749Ah duels, good times. Remind her to tell you of the time i beat her, twice. *smiles* Anyways good luck Vex.>>37090777Ok what is it?
>>37090755m8? Are you sure you're the head of the guild library? Not some skulking person from the thives of merchants guild trying to get dangerous esoterica off us?
>>37090628Gotcha. I believe I had one written up earlier. I suppose I'll re-post it here.Jarlkin is, well, a half-orc. Grayish-brown skin, small tusks, slight point to his ears, somewhat more muscular build, black, messy hair (possibly done in braided dreadlocks), kinda gruff-looking, etc. Your typical half-orc stuff. Wears leather armor when adventuring or dealing with his fellow guild members, as well as a waist-length cape and a headband, and wields a warhammer in one hand.So, anyone need me t'get somethin' done 'round here?
>>37090713I've had my likeness put unto paper >>37088294And Fryia has a new apprentice.>>37090737Good to hear it, just let me know if you need any tips.
>>37090812Good for you!
>>37090749>Has his brother in a head lock. Somehow."I'm so sorry ma'am, I'll be sure to gag him bef-">Punches his bother in the face"Trouble? me? please."
>>37090777Wouldn't mind seeing more duels around here. It was very fun.
>>37090655>>37090315 Okay, here goes. I juse want to thank you so much for the help, I thought that there would be a lot more ass pain, if it would even be possible. >Begins to uncork->>37090794WHAT THE HELL.
>>37090804Aetherius and I have come up with a possible countermeasure for the "decommissioning" spell, I need help with testing it with your spelleye and divination.
>>37090822Soros, you missed the huge free for all prank fight. It started with Pierre trying to make Noel wear pants, and then it escalated.
This all reminds me, I never intended for Marus to be human, but elf and orc seems overdone now, and I hate dwarves, any ideas?
>>37090822>Noone spot soros and runs over to whisper something in his ear but trips and is about to collide with the Diviner
>>37090809First of all I am our Head Librarian, second it's not that rare or dangerous, it's on what our library survives.Do you think the funding of mage guild cover up all precious metals we use in our books, HA , with only them we wont be able to even keep the building intact
>>37090865 GNOME MASTER RACE!
>>37090865how about a beast man, we only have that catgirl paladin so far
>>37090804Soros. Just when I was going to say I am glad to see you, you had to point that out. >>37090811good, good. On my list it goes.
>>37090857Sure, sounds like fun.>>37090861Drat, sorry i missed it.>>37090874*invisible servants catches Noone and set him on his feet*>>37090865hobgoblin
>>37090865 gretchin or goblin
>>37090897well, third time's usually the charm isn't it little Fryja? *smiles jokingly*
>>37090822I want to draw one for you too, soros. Just write down your physical description
>>37090841Now now. Settle the brotherly fighting for when I arrange the students into gladiatorial combat.>>37090905Soros, you have an apprentice, right? Is he/she going to be in my classes?
>>37090865Wait, is orc overdone? The only reason Jarlkin is a half-orc is because he's based on a Pathfinder character I ran who was one. Also, perhaps Kobold or Gnome?
Ok, so far it's between Bugbear and Gnome, I do like the idea of a bugbear wearing a robe and telling people to please sit down and please try some of my home grown tea
>>37090905"Can you help me keep an eye on Pierre and the head necromancer? They where talking about bringing Stabby back."
>>37090956Awesome. I now imagine you voiced by Kelsey Grammer.
>>37090865As a Biomancer and Fleshwarper you've obviously self-evolved beyond your original dragonborn form.
>>37090942>arrange the students into gladiatorial combat.You what?>>37090918I will stomp your face into the dirt one day soros. Be warned.
>>37090956you know what you should go with instead of a bugbear?Awakened Owlbear
>>37090989That's what teachers do, right?
>>37090942>Is 2 heads on one body
>>37090930Tall, thin, pale, eyes taht never seem to be the same color when you look at them again, clean shaven, grey haired, Prefers a Blue robe of fine make, usually has a dagger, his bouncy balls, and a crystal ball on him. This enough detail?>>37090942He might be, still working on his schedule.>>37090965Gladly.>>37090989*smiles* you can try.
>>37090992God am I grumpy in the mornings.
>>37091011... next morning, instead of going to teach, you will come to my office and we will have a little chat about your newfound duties
>>37091024You should visit Sir Archibald Frothington sometime. He's growing into an adorable killing machine!
>>37091011That's what the truly great ones do.
>>37091040*gives Fryja a thumb pup*
>>37091011Not with those two, they are a rare bread of apprentice in being ones I actually like. I would be most cross if you manage to get them killed.Feel free to do it with the others though, most of them could use some weeding out.
>>37091015 what I find amusing is, I actually pictured him very similiar to this description in my mind. Thanks and will do.
>>37091040oh...that's nice...should write this one in the next book for sure
>>37091075Good girl, good girl.>>37091077See, I am not that bad at teaching after all.
>>37091049Aaaw, he's growing up so fuzzy, good boy, I'll get you some nice tough bones and steel shavings to toughen up your beak.
>>37091083Yes, sir. You have my word that I won't intentionally get them killed.
>>37091128So as an awakened owlbearwhat do you recommend for Awakening my mimic?
>>37091162Steady diet of crystallized magic.
>>37091146Wait, no! Listen to me, the head of necromancy is a good fellow but never ever should you ask him for advice in this matters least you want to lose half your students in one go.
>>37091093Cool.Funny how that work sometimes ain't it?>>37091117Never said you were a bad teacher, you just need more emotional control.>>37091128On that topic how Did you awaken?
>>37091083Oh, ex-head of necromancy, do you some spare spooky skeletals for night duty in our library?
>>37091194I really don't remember. It's been very very long, I remember a nice lady giving me a kiss on the forehead though, and then everything went bright.. And I had thoughts.
>>37091192Oh, uh, yes. Don't worry, Mistress, I'll make sure my students aren't viscously mutilated in any way.
>>37091108Oh don't look so smug about being the first apprentices in years to earn my approval... actually, keep looking smug, you have earned it.>>37091146Good, I guess that's all I can ask for I guess.>>37091192I know I have a bad track record with apprentices, but I've never lost that many apprentices at once.>>37091227Sure, they are in the basement with the other undead.
>>37091251Please enchant me some of those thoughts, Marus.
>>37091264Cromina approves your way to deal with students. This alone should lead you to question your own methods
>>37091282What do you mean?
>>37091251Sounds divine Marus *sniggers* Sorry puns.>>37091264Hey Lazarus, how goes it?
>>37091264Thanks, I will go to basement and get them from there. And are they already "activated" or they're still bones lying on the ground?
>>37091300You were kissed in the forehead by a"nice lady"and then"you had thoughts"Tell us about it!
>>37091339I... I meant sentience, Redwood.I had sentience.
>>37090889Speaking of which, what should I do if that paladin tries to uh... fornicate with my students?
>>37091369Okay, fine.Tell us about the Lady then.>>37091394Erm pardon me but aren't Paladins pure?
>>37091297I'm not sure I see the problem with that.>>37091312Quite well actually, haven't seen Lich Cerik yet tough so I might have to take over as head again in his absence so we can actually get things done in the Necromancy Department.>>37091325They are standing but dormant, I left instructions tied to the neck of the one in front for how to get them moving.
>>37091394Set her on fire or something like that, I find her to be annoying as no one else is.
>>37091407Okay! I'll be back in no time
>>37091394What your apprentices do in their own time is up to them. Unless you tell them otherwise of course.>>37091406Most are, but catfolk are known for being literal "lewd beasts".
>>37091406Well.. I made the painting I showed you earlier, that's what she looked like.She was very comforting, and had a silent grace about her. She smelled like tilled earth and the woods in spring, and like blood. You can't see it there but she had it all over her hands and chin. She smiled, her teeth were sharp. And she kissed me. After that she had disappeared by the time I opened my eyes. I have made it a point not to seek her out in all the years I've been alive, you don't hunt something like her, she hunts you.
>>37091407Not surprised are you?>>37091394Water bottle>>37091406Catfolk Paladin, no nudity or sexual taboos.>>37091453Sounds like a nature deity. I could look her up if you want.
>>37091486Well, yeah, ofcourse. But no, you can look her up for yourself if you want. She can see me if she wishes, but I will not hunt her.This was also like.. Several thousand years ago.. So she may have changed a bit.
>>37091453Oh my. Your fair lady seems no fair at all, marus. If I were you I'd hope not to see her again.
>>37091438What if I bring out the "Oathbreaker"? +4 against paladin tushy.
><---(Meanwhile in the basement)
>>37091506Or she might have gotten offed, nature deities have a pretty short shelf life sadly.>>37091527She might enjoy it, or overpower you and use it on you.>>37091536Lazarus your skeletons are getting out of hand in the basement again.
>>37091486Well, you know Cerik and his reputation for skipping work. I have already started taking up more duties in the department to make the transition as smooth as possible. I'm not sure what to do about the new name tag though The recently reinstituted head of necromancy perhaps?
>>37091527Whatever, as long as she does not lay her paws on my students.
>>37091545Yeah, always a chance. I think I gave her some of my game, I think that's where the blood came from.. It's all so hazy..>>37091527I bet she would enjoy that actually, did you know cats have barbed penises?>>37091536Give it a good whack on the skull, if they don't listen after that, either run or break them.
>>37091536>>37091545>sighs and grabs his staffI left very easy instructions for how to activate those skeletons safely. Oh well, guess I got to go take care of this.
>>37091545I.. hadn't thought of that. Given my luck with dice rolls, that's surprisingly likely.>>37091555I'll do my best to keep her paws off of them, Mistress.
>>37091554Just use you name, it's easier.>>37091562I'll check around, just in case.>>37091571Good luck.
>>37091571Can I have some of the femurs for Archibald?
>>37091593Greatest weapon a wizard has is his mind Vex remember that.
>>37091527You're making me unseasonably warm.
>>37091614Yes, Master Soros.
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>37091571>(the skeleton army intensifies )The shouts from the basement: "You foking skeletals, oh no you didn't!"
So who haven't I met?
>>37091632>>37091670I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Vex, no longer the most powerful witch, but certainly still the most fabulous.You should cool yourself off in my swamp sometime.
Finally back from this basement.I wont go there again, now those raging skeletons are Lazarus problems
Rolled 4 (1d20)>>37091652With so low a power roll, they ain' t do any harm. Yet still...>control undead
>>37091695>most fabulousDon't make me beat you down twice in a row, vex.
Rolled 15 (1d20)>>37091652Oh stop that you pile of bones!>casts greater hold undead
>>37091730>>37091731What's with all the rumbling?>Redwood deads down to the basement
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>37091710Whoops. I hope our little duel didn't burn out your witchiness for the day, Mistress.I'll join in, since I'm not doing anything else right now.>Make the skeletons dance harder
>>37091745>Deads downFuck, *heads downWhy>>37091748>Redwood enters after Vex delievers his combat roll, seeing the fucking Skeleton Horde Dancing
>>37091695Well met, I'm Dramorn, thrower of fireballs and lighting amoungst other things, and proud future parent of an arm mimic. I am rather fond of swamps myself, I'm sure yours is especially lovely.
>Does the thriller
> tfw none posts theme music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6-ZGAGcJrk
>>37091731And that's why I was the head of necromancy!>>37091748Oh please don't encourage them.>>37091843I was going to but I was on the phone.
>>37091730I deeply apologize, Mistress. But my radiance cannot be measured in dice. I mean, please don't be offended, as you are especially lovely.>>37091817It really is beautiful. Perhaps you can join me there tonight when the mushroom people launch fireworks to kick off the new year.In fact, everyone is invited to the mushroom fireworks! I realized this is your first new years in my swamp, and you'll all love it.
Ok guys, gather round. I don't know about your timezone, but here the new year is starting right now, so have an hppy new year feom me and cromina who's playing dark souls right next to me, the idiot. Let me say you are the ampng the best things I discovered his year and I look forward to another year of shenanigans with you fellow wizards.
>>37091864at least now they wont jump on people, still they are best night workers librarian could imagine>>37091884swamps....swamps..Yes, that swamp>>37091899good thing that cromina is giting gud
>>37091899I'm a filthy Murican, so I'm a little behind, but I fully agree. You guys have been fun, and are the reason I keep coming back to /tg/. Have a happy New Year.
>>37091899Happy new year to you too, crazy bird lady!
>>37091899American here looking forward to it. Happy new year!
Rolled 12 (1d20)>>37091864>>37091748What the hell are you two doing? This isn't how you do it.>Casts turn undead!>Abefore you ask, yes, im just looking for excuses to burn a Dice.>>37091899>Calling someone next to you an idiotCarfulAlso, merry Christmas, i guess.
>>37091899Same time zone here, as I think we established earlier, happy new year to the both of you. Actually, happy new year to all of you. This has been a good year of wizard shenanigans, so let's have another like just as good.>>37091919Well at least help direct them to where they should be.
>>37091884Oh, it would be my pleasure! My homeplace was littered with swamps as soon as you left the city and got southward through the bay area. And myconids, gotta love 'em. Harworking, honest, hallucinogenic, some of the best folks around.I'll bring some wine.>>37091899Who is Cromina? I've heard of this one many times.
>>37091999"A really scary lady."
Is it too late to hop in with a new character? Should I just wait for the next thread?
>>37091899Happy new years Fryia, tell Cromina happy new years as well.
>>37091925>>37091949My Fellow Americans of African origin.Any East Coasters?
Happy newyears from everyone in Norway, just came back from the fireworks.
>>37092051Feel free to join at any time>>37092060Massachussets
>starts setting up kegs
>>37091999Cromina was once Cromwald the Destroyer a member of the fighters guild before becoming the victim of a prank enchantment put on the fighters guild entrance turning anyone who walked through it into a woman. She has since become an Eldritch Knight and the head of Applied Magic.Actually it's been a while since the apprentices pranked the fighters guild, I think she might have deterred them from trying again.
>>37092124"Uhhhh like what happens if someone from the mages guild did pranks the fighters guild?"
>>37092145You get cake, or cookies, or cupcakes. Whatever, you get tea and associated goods from me in my lab.
>>37092060ConnecticutLet's see if this thread lasts until our midnight
>>37092162"I switched out all there alcohol with O'Doul's."
Greetings, fellow Great Wizards, it is I, your immortal bane! I have no need of your pictures, because...because pictures could not possibly portray my true awesomeness! Ha, you would do well to tremble before my might, for I could end you all with a glance. Do not test me; I would shoot shuriken-lazers from my eyes to burn and impale you, part your head from torso with my katana, spike your skulls on my horned helme- No mum don't come in I'm talking with those people I told you about! No, I don't need anything to drink! I drank that girl's soul on the way back from school, remember? No, they're real souls, mum, it's not lemonade I swear. Don't hug me in front of the other Wizards! I'm thirteen now, I'm too old for that. Dad said I have to start acting like a real Darklord. He said I could stay up until midnight now for New Years, too. No, he did, he did!Fine, I'll clean my room when I'm done. Now get out! I'm being cool with the wizards. And don't call me Ozzy! I told you, it's Ozymandias the Unholy now. Lu'cif'r, I hate you mum......Fear me! For I am your inevitable demise! You should enjoy this new years while you can! But, in the interim between your bloody deaths and the present, may I inquire as to where I could obtain a lock capable of keeping out stupid mums who don't respect Prince of Daemon's privacy?
>>37092194>Is pretty scared
>>37092145Depends on the prank, if it's another portal to the elemental plane of catgirls they usually get's unlived on the spot, we had enough of that prank ages ago.>>37092190That prank will get you a good job and a pat on the back. Just don't make it a habit, repairing our relations with the fighters guild took a while.
>>37092190You get extra brandy in yours.>>37092194You'd be one of the new apprentices then? You can sign up for departments with the secretary, or you can approach us in person. What's your name? Do we call you Ozzy? I'm ok with that.So. Looks like you may want to study necromancy?
>>37092194Hi Ozy! The only locks capable of keeping out you mother would cost well above what you could afford. After all you um know knock.>>37092124She did, mostly. I can say if my students make a prank they do it properly and untraceably.
>>37092194So, which dark and evil overlord is your father, "ozzy"?
>>37091949Hey, Master. How are you this evening?Canadian, here>>37090942I've got enough credits to take either of your classes, Miss Vex. Should I go for potions or fashion?
>>37092244"Don't mock him! He's drink your soul like">makes slurping sound
>>37092090I guess that makes us neighbours, I'm from Sweden.>>37092194Welcome to the Department of Necormancy, you will fit right in with the other apprentices.
>>37092254canada eh?well time to switch roles, goig to get good at dark souls. Farewell comrades, it has been entertaining as always.
>>37092254Hello Marcus! Did Maxwell and Lombardi finish their punishments for selling recordings of their scrying of Fryja and Noel? Also unless you want to dress in drag take potions.>>37092294Playing until you die and switch off?
>>37092254Fashion. Definitely fashion.>>37092294Have a good night. Thanks for indulging in Vex's duel.
>>37092322"why are you teaching fashion at a mages guild?"
>>37092310 until crom gets too tired of dying to go on, I am still leagues above her anyway
>>37092338Ever hear of fashionista's? Yeah.. Those are from here. They don't interact much with the rest of us.
>>37092339 will Crom be getting on?
>>37092339heh always wanted to play, never got a copy. Need to finish my backlog of games first though.>>37092338Don't ask.
>>37092310They're almost done, I think.That's not usually an issue with witches, is it?
>>37092339and on what boss he is dying?
>>37092352"The fuck is a fashionista and why do I have the uncontrollable urge to kill someone right now?">Is stabbing the nearest person next to him
>>37092377No, but Vex only does female fashion. You'll enjoy the view but get mocked by almost every male you meet.
I'm really scraping the bottom of the barrel with this picture. Guess it's goodbye moustache for this thread after this.>>37092375So Soros, any news on my spell casting?
>>37092418Made a few breakthroughs, would have made more except for aforementioned apprentices selling crystals recording Noel and Fryja fun times. Let me tweak the field and then power it up.
>>37092338I'm shocked to find my fellow elf so out of touch.Style should never be ignored, dear Noone. It is what separates us from common mages. One should always look their best when, and often in the assistance of, manipulating the fabric of reality.
>>37092382[Spoiler] gargoyle. Not going to tell her to put on the electricity enhancement though, wnat to see how much it takes to realize it herself. Would it surprise you to know she is actually a woman?>>37092356Only if she gets too bored seeing me clearing everything she can't.
>>37092234My father, a terrible and mighty figure, has already me up for necromancy.>>37092288Good. I hope they will fear me as is proper. I, in turn, shall treat you as any true prince of the black lineage should. Do any of the apprentices like katanas? I like katanas.>>37092235Aw. I'll have to keep the sign I hang on my door for when I'm hanging out with the other darklings, then. And it's Ozymandias the Unholy, please.>>37092244Thesaur- I mean Isaurus the Great Defiler. Mum always laughs when I say that, I don't know why.>>37092275I will, lowly one, and it shall taste sickly and bitter and acrid and...and delicious. I will not throw up like last time, because dad was not pleased when I did that.
>>37092411When I get through with your apprentice, not a boy in the mortal world will laugh or joke about his stunning wardrobe. He'll look positively adorable! Perfect for bewitching all of his fellow apprentices. Maybe even some teachers while he's at it.
>>37092060Hello. New Yorker here.>>37092194Hoy, small fry. Welcome t'th' guild. Now, I seem t'be th' de facto adventurer extraordinaire 'round these parts. Whether it's delvin' into dark caves, diggin' up artifacts in ancient ruins, or sailin' th' seven seas, I'm th' man t'see. Jus'... don't run with the Thieves Guild. It never ends well.>>37092418You could always resort to photoshopping moustaches onto Jubey. It is a reanimated kyubey corpse after all
>>37092456What's going on? Who's Crom?(outside of Conan the Barbarian)>>37092475You should probably calm down a bit, put down that shitt..Interesting, I mean interesting and exotic sword, have some tea and we can go over the brochure, I'm sure you would like to study something else as well? It's not up to your father what you pick.
>>37092194Hey, I'm pretty new too, well not really but it's a long and sensual story. Good to have you!>>37092124That is the most beautiful thing if heard in years.>>37092080>>37092077>>37092179>>37092092I'm from Baltimore, er "Calvert", myself. She's the love of my life she is. >>37092090Ah, a northerner! A beautiful land, to be sure, the second love of my life, next to your neighbor country.>>37092145I don't think we've met formally either lad, I am Dramorn "Soon-To-Be-Flesh-Arm" the Dragonborn earthbreaker, wielder of the forces of nature! Or something.
>>37092456So maybe depending on how easily you do it?>>37092475Dropped your nametag Ozzy.>>37092506Crom aka Cromina
Yash! Weeeeell met erryone! Fryia irl is such a prick
>>37092437"They are clothes! that's all. If you can't look good in a burlap sack, wearing something else won't help with that!">>37092475>Wets himself
>>37092501That's uh... tempting? But I'd rather be, you know, Manly™. Maybe I'll do your potions class instead.
>>37092541Hello Cromina, are you drunk? *inches away slowly*
>>37092501Yeah I was warning him as such. I doubt he wants to be a trap.>>37092564Told you so.
>>37092565Soros pliz, I'm not drunk- yet.
>>37092541you died to gargoiles, they are not THAT hard I'd say. how many times?Hi
>>37092529Well that's embarrasingly obvious
>>37092541"Cromina! If it true you used to be a man?"
>>37092586That is not reassuring <Titan's strength>>>37092595Yup
>>37092504Ah! A mighty city indeed. I was actually born in the island of Mann'Hatan. I prefer the subtle charm of my fair Calvert.
>>37092508"Hello good sir, I am Krogrr and this is my brother, Brogrr."
>>37092579To be honest irl, I'd love nothing more, but Marcus wants to be a manly manI'm sure potions will be fine. I mean, divination features some alchemy to hone one's mind, right, Master? Like that Spice of Arrakis, stuff.
>>37092586Good Evening Cromina.
>>37092501No mortal would laugh, but the whole mage guild will. Or maybe most mortals too
>>37092641I have some of that in my lab, but it's very underwhelming. The worms are cool though.
>>37092641Yes, certain potions and agents can be made and used to boost one's prowess in Divination or magic in general. Do be warned the more potent it is, the more side effect there will be. The spice of Arrakis is addictive and will mutate you with use. Fair warning.
>>37092597Uh, who told you? Fine, it is true, look it up in the archive, it was that one time with the stars on hats issue I think.>>37092589Yeah, fuck you too. let the newbie die, pliz. Still a noob after all.
>>37092436Excellent, as I have said before while I don't really have any problems with the body itself the lack of spellcasting is becoming a bother.>>37092504I have been pasting moustaches on qb pictures for a while now and I'm getting tired of it. I'm assuming Jubey is from one of the movies? I've only seen the series.>>37092541Hello again Cromina, how goes your night?
What everyone think about dragon as warden of my books, skeletons are good for basic books, but more rare are still not save?
>>37092541Well Met fellow warrior mage! You missed the first meeting of the newly minted Fighter-Wizard Guild, I'm sure you would have been well received!>>37092638Hile brothers, well met. I have a brother too, a Sorcerer. I hope he finds his way here someday.
>>37092727They're very proud, you'd have to pay them a LOT.Enslaving them is a very bad idea though.
>>37092475Ah, a katana wielder, are ya, Small Fry? Jus' a bit of advice from a fellow spellsword; while they're quite sharp, they're just as brittle as a result, an' break easily if y'don't swing 'em right. Keep your wrist nice and limp, like you're castin' out a fishin' line. Otherwise you'll crack it like an egg. I'd recommend somethin' a bit more durable for an apprentice like y'self. Perhaps a I could commission a good ol' fashioned orcish warhammer from my clan's blacksmith. Or, perhaps somethin' tha' relies more on finesse than brute strength, like a rapier or a saber. Or if you'd prefer t'use somethin' of eastern origin, a dao might be of interest t'you.
>>37092720"Do you wanna be a man again?"
>>37092727What kind of dragon? I only ask because we might be distantly related.
>>37092506Thanks, but people couldn't see my katana if I put it down. And dad said I had to take necromancy. He said the other Darklords would laugh at a Darkling who couldn't even lift the dead from their graves. But...I mean, I wouldn't mind seeing how obviously lame something like healing magic could be. You do healing, right? Not that I'd care, of course. >>37092504Thank you, tusked one. I will remember those who helped me.>>37092508I do not know what sensual means, but it is good to meet you too.>>37092529Damn, thanks. I guess I'll just close my other tabs for now.Well, it's New Years here in England, now. I'd be sad that I'm not at a party right now, were it not for the fact that I hate parties and all my friends are asleep anyway. Happy new year, and I swear I'm not as lonely as that above paragraph sounded.
>>37092682>>37092721Hello guys, went to pick a fight against a pair of gargoyles. Not that easy but check it out, I made axes out of heir taes and they are, like, totally bitchy.
>>37092720I'm afraid that was me, one of the newer members wanted to know. I'm sorry if you didn't want me to bring it up, I figured it was more or less common knowledge.
>>37092714As long as you know.>>37092721*tweaks the field it zaps quin* That should get you some basic magic back. Sorry for the slow progress I have been distracted of late.>>37092727Use a celestial, less fire more smiting. Dragon would steal the book anyways.>>37092773I understand the sentiments, copy and pasting for the name helps.
>>37092751They are warding my books, the book which are made of pure gold, with platinum writings on it. Too just see those riches many dragons would say , YES!>>37092771some greedy, who wont let thieves take my precious gold books
>>37092683I think you're in need of a little attitude adjustment. I like the sound of "Library Princess Mana Deleos".
>>37092773Tell you what, don't think of your dad, have some tea, and let's look at this brochure. And yes, we do healing magic, I know quite a lot of it myself as I use it in my pursuit, I can even teach you a quick spell right now, all you do is do this chant ***EDITED OUT*** and snap your fingers, then trace your fingers above the open wound. It will close the skin without a scar.Now, we have many departments, if you want to learn more healing I can help you with that, I teach a basic class of it. Anyone have a picture of an Owlbear in a robe?>>37092809Ok, that will probably work,not so sure about lending them back out though.
>>37092744Nah, have been there for a little while, I like the work ye guys are doing, keep up with the good stuff.>>37092794Who cares, I don't give two wizard hats about it but it has the side effects of keeping away potential male partners.
>>37092845WHAT WHAT ABOUT MORTIMER!
>>37092826You do that, I turn you into a Vexus. *smiles*>>37092845Pretty sure with the exception of Mort you went for the girl Cromina. What changed?
>>37092780Fancy. >>37092773Happy new year and welcome to the guild
>>37092829I can whip something up quick. Like a fancy robed owlbear smoking a pipe? Or an owlbear in a wizard robe?
>>37092874That would be awesome. So awesome.
Well im out guy Happy New Year!
>>37092869I, i do, ehr, not know what you making a big fuss about mate. Eheheh, ehm.
>>37092796No problems, you have been a miracle worker. Now let's try this out.>attempts to casts a spell and burns her moustacheAaaaah, my moustache! I liked having a moustache again...Oh well, at least it's sort of working again, but I guess I have to get used to having all this extra power to work with. Practice, practice and practice should solve that though.
>>37092870Kindly remove yourself from my beeswax, Master Soros.But also, happy new year>>37092896Wait, which one?
>>37092897Weeee wil miss ya soros! Happy new year!>>37092870Girls, guys, who cares. As long as I am on top.>>37092872eheh, aren't they?
>>37092780 axes are for losers, uchigatana masterrace 24/7 >>37092826I would rather not
>>37092942Partial to the pipe, but the one you want to make the most is fine by me!
>>37092906>againEhrm what are you trying to tell us qb?>>37092874So I heard someone kicked yer sorry ass, right?
>>37092475Personally I prefer local swords, it's better to have plenty of cheap and easily acquirable weapons when you want to arm your undead armies.>>37092773Dropping your nametag happens, personally I have done the mistake of posting as the wrong character, now that was an embarrassing moment.>>37092845Very well, I'll be more discreet in the future.
>>37092991Should I chop yer hand off?>>37092951 out of my sight dex based faggot, yer just like fryia.
>>37093007Thank you Res. Always appreciated. Yer among my favorite guys here, ye know?
>>37092955I'll do the fancy pipe biomancer first and see where it goes from there>>37092951If you're sure. It'd get a lot of apprentices going to the library more often, I'll tell you that much.>>37092976Ugh, yes. My pride got the better of me, and Fryia defeated me in a bewitching duel. Now, I'm her apprentice for the foreseeable future.
>>37093008"Hey, you didn't answer my question."
>>37093023You're a peach, Vex.(Am I using that right?)
>>37093025aoh for- yes, yes, I used to be a man. Happy now?
>>37092950They definitely seem right up your alley.>>37093040i think so
>>37092976Wait, I never told you guys when I talked about the lolimancer's curse I was put under about a century back? Hmm... I guess my mind was a mess back then, what with the slipping morals and no one letting me get my revenge... Well let's just say you and I have something in common.
>>37093078"No my other question!"
>>37093023Oh, it would be better if we had less of them running around.They cause so much headache, not writing in books they took, casting spells near bookshelves disturbing my scriptorium constructs or even worse! Disturbing me during work
>>37093040I'm whatever fruit flavor your heart desires.
>>37093008 that's why we can clear boss in two or even fight
>>37093141Hah, I love it.
>>37093106Ah, ahem, ah-Ahahahahahahahahah! Ahw, QB, come here and let me hug you! So this is why you didn't want yer old body back?
>>37093106I'm sorry to hear that Quin, I've made some great headway on undoing lolimancy, but so far I have only managed to make the original casters of spells explode painfully. I'll inform you first if headway is made.God I hate lolis
>>37093108About mort? I am talking to no one.
Where's the drink?! We can hardly greet the new year sober can we?!
>>37093195"Noooooooo!">Sighs"I ask Do you want to be a man again?"
>>37093208I've got some Spider Cider. I know we have a little Dragonvenom in the cellar. Would you like me to get some?Any other requests? We've stocked up recently, I know that much.
>>37093208>conjure forth kegs of alehave one mate
Rolled 424 (1d5000)>>37093208of course we need something to drink>casting spell to summon given ammount of bottles
>>37093265Just the right number of bottles we need!
>>37093208*reaches into his shadow and tosses you a bottle of strong smelling liquor labeled "Valen Silver"*If you don't want to be sober anymore, have a drink of this.
>>37093241If I wanted I could have done it. A remove curse and you are golden . Nah, it does not matter anymore, man or woman, who cares? Until I am myself, my body shape is irrilevant.
>>37093165Yes that would be the reason.>>37093193Thanks for the concern but I got this new body now and I like it a lot better than the old one. I still want to go up to that lolimancer and laugh in her face for finally escaping the body she chose for me... hmm... I think I might do that after this meeting is over, and then punch her in the face.>>37093244Doesn't both Spider Cider and Dragonvenom kill normal humans? Give me some Dragonvenom to go, it's one of the few drinks that affect this body.
>>37092829That is clearly much worse than necromancy. It is laughable, ha ha ha. I would like to see whether this extends even to the more advanced healing spells. So I can laugh at them. Ha. Thanks for the brochure and tea. When does the basic class start, learned one?>>37093007That's what mum said but a katana is more noble and faster and better at making clean wounds that can be stitched up easier than a normal sword wound.Heh, yeah, I'll try not to do it again, if only to make things easier for everyone.>>37092872Thanks, it's good to be here.
>>37093311"But you're stuck wearing a dress!"
>>37093244Pardon me for intrusionDidn't we hardly have any money since recently? How much money did everyone just spend on the last hour?
I try no' t'drink too much, so I'll jus' make some tea.
>>37093244>>37093251>>37093265EXCELLENT! If I begin to remote my clothes I highly suggest incapacitating me.
>>37093340Are you old enough to drink little human?>>37093346Come now magus, it's a party!
>>37093340Ofcourse, come back at any time, I always make a point to help inquiring students. Even if it is just to see how lame the spell is.The classes start at one in the afternoon in the classroom beneath my tower.
>>37093337Oh, yeah. Right. I forgot they said that.Humans, make sure you read the labels!Also, roll if you're drinking magical liquor. Maybe something funny happens when you drink it.
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>37093388Oooh, drinks.*has one*(what table?)
Rolled 10 (1d20)>>37093388the magic one is the best you can find if this dice hits 1 im fuked
>>37093388Oh, oh, doing that too!
>>37093368'Alf-orc. I'm a 'alf-orc. I jus' prefer something caffeinated as my drink of choice.
Rolled 6 (1d20)>>37093453Meh, I am bad at thongs, I am bad at things...
>>37093425I suppose we could roll 1d1000 on this one:http://www.angelfire.com/rpg2/vortexshadow/magic/unstablemagic.html
Rolled 950 (1d1000)>>37093427hmmm... I do not feel anything, I should take second one *picks up next bottle from the floor*
Rolled 17 (1d20)>>37093475... fuck. Second barrel, now!
Rolled 689 (1d1000)>>37093476Ah, I guess the last one was mundane, bottoms up.
>>37093460"Whats an Alforc?
>>37093489Cement Overshoes: Target buried to his waist or to 5’ (whichever is less) in solid concrete>>37093503pider: A poisonous spider (DM choice) appears near the caster and attacks.
>>37093503*spits out spider* Hello little buddy.
>>37093425>>37093427I best slather on my mimic so I don't accidentally drink 'im. >Slowly uncorks the vial, then pours the liquid mimic over the warforged left arm.What do I do now?
>>37093344I don't know about you, but I am the Lord of the second wealthiest Province in the kingdom. If anyone here needs some gold to have an enjoyable Years End, consider it paid.>>37093388I think I will stick with traditional Alcohol. *takes another bottle of Valen Silver from his shadow and drinks some*
Rolled 194 (1d1000)>>37093522Oh, it'll attach on its own, just have a drink and relax.I think I'll have another.
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>37093388Alright, down it goes, and then I'm off to laugh and punch a lolimancer in the face.>drinks some Dragonvenom™
Rolled 8 (1d20)>>37093515ugh, now I should get out of 'ere!>casting teleportation magic
>>37093513>sighs and puts on a headband of alluring charisma.Half-orc without the H. I suppose you haven't quite familiarized yourself with my accent yet.
Rolled 477, 712, 3 = 1192 (3d1000)anyone for elixir shots?
Rolled 4456 (1d7935)>>37093388
>>37093556>>37093476Hand me that table, let's have some fun with this.
>>37093368Of course I am old enough to drink. But...I have decided not to drink your souls for now. It would be disrespectful.Wait, you mean that? Oh. I have drunken that before, yes. It's okay, I guess, but I prefer jasmine tea and lemonade.>>37093378Great! I shall be there early. For practice, may I ask where you keep your torture pits?
Rolled 403 (1d1000)>>37093586DIIIIIIICEEEEE!
Rolled 442, 269, 569 = 1280 (3d1000)ugh...at least it got me unstuck, maybe it's time for shots as Vex did
>>37093598I have one outside of the apprentice chambers for the students that don't take to the studies and spend all class yapping.The other ones are in the basement.I'll be sure to be there early.>>37093553Well this is depressing, a bunch of skeletons..
Think this thread will stay until midnight in the US, or will we have to do a third one?
Rolled 608 (1d1000)>>37093534Well then.>>37093388Wait a minute guys i wi->>37093515>>37093521Eh, enjoy.I feel like this isn't going to do much, but its worth a try.>Redwood grabs a bottle of "Beer">Casts Bless Item!>Its surrounded in a faint white light>Redwood consumes the Blessed Beer
Rolled 18, 15 = 33 (2d20)>>37093644ohoh>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLBZLjLBMKstime to save myself from jellyfish inside
>>37093658As long as it stays enjoyable, three is good.
>>37093658A third one? That would be the first time ever in the history of the guild!
Rolled 10 (1d10)Just checking to see how blurry my beer goggles are.
Rolled 602, 255, 557, 971, 969, 715, 913, 780, 26, 949 = 6737 (10d1000)Im not jellyfi', tim for 'om mor shotas
>>37093602>looks up at the potted apple tree in front of herHuh, can anyone move this to my department's lobby? I got some century old revenge to enact.
going to bed, you lot have happy new year!
>>37093690Bleh>stumbles. Needs to sit down for a minute.
Hmm... might as well join in on the fun. Perhaps some caffeine-fueled magic could be of interest.>chugs a large pot of teaNow, to sit and wait until it kicks in.
>>37093695I will tell the next convenient apprentice.>>37093697happy new year
>>37093715Hey! MY TEA!
Rolled 12 (1d20)>>37093668NOPENOPENOPE>Redwood speeds off
Alright, I'm back in the game. Plenty of muggle shots left. Who's up for a 1d100 shots challenge against me?
And i'm back, seems Maxwell and Lombardi sprung an alarm. They were suitably punished.
>>37093792Bring it on witch.
>>37093741Thank you, just make sure they don't break it when they move it.>casts flightQB AWAY!
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>37093792I'm in, roll your amount and let's do this.
>>37093694*gets hit by a hammer**gets hit by a hands**The armour teleports on me**disappears**appears again**the earth starts to rumble**Polimorfs in (Someone pick something that rymes with Manus or Deleos)**keeps lying on the ground*
Rolled 548 (1d1000)>>37093744Oh, shush, there's more in the kitchen. Also-I-should-probably-inform-you-that-I-may-or-may-not-have-used-one-of-the-potion-brewing-pots-to-brew-hibiscus-tea.
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>37093831I'll have a creative punishment for you when I drink you under the table.going to laugh my ass off if I lose this challenge, too
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>37093842It will be a cold day in the nine hells the day someone like you outdrink the magnificent Cromia.
>>37093860I grow dry and brew it myself!Also that's alright.
>>37093792Muggle shots?>>37093831Do I want to know?>>37093880What did I miss?
>>37093842You're drunk, Marus.>>37093872Ah, no! I lost!
>>37093872I'll take you both on any day! Drink for drink!(owlbear constitution also helps)
I heard you guys had magical drinks, all the barrels of alcohol in the Elemental Plane of Fire Guild Hall exploded... AGAIN!Please tell me you guys still have some.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>37093880*starts knocking back shots*
>>37093913*424 bottles of some magic liquid are on the ground*
>>37093892Drinking contest.>>37093900Which I have won.
>>37093892What did you miss?Magic beer conquest that will probably burn your foot off.
>>37093934Oh, well ok then. Drinking contests lost their luster after I realized I can't get drunk anymore. Rigged game.
Rolled 620, 565, 627 = 1812 (3d1000)>>37093933Bottoms up!
>>37093934Curse you, eldritch knight
>>37093860>Pivot The caster pivots 360 degrees, creating a vortex. All creatures (except the caster) in the caster's original line of sight are drawn in, emerging on the ethereal plane.Spinnin' round me, things are finally happening! Step up to me, this dance fight will be legendary!
>>37093924*coughs and drops a shot glass* Bah what the hell kind of alcohol did you give me? This tastes aweful!
>>37093978That's dishsoap. Here, have this drink.
>>37093960Ya cannot? I pity you... uhm, my head feels funny, yet it is just the sixth barrel. Ah.>>37093968One day you are gonnalearn not to pick fights with people who are better then you are at the thing you are challenging them to.
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>37094001Ugh no wonder. Someone yell at the Alcomancy apprentice who left this in the liquor shelf.
*Still none picked in what I have polimorphed**Still burns**Still lies on the ground*
>>37093968Cromina is tough I'm surprised you did a well as you did. Damn lucky no con modifiers.>>37094040Nope, part of the whole world eater thing. At best I can get tipsy for a few seconds.
>>37093965>Gort is stunned>Gort's staff is cursed>Gort is now ON FIREHow did my robe even ignite, it's made of non-flammable materials to prevent this from happening, HOW!?You guys wouldn't happen to have a hydromancer around today?
>>37094042*blegh* ALL I CAN TASTE IS SOAP DAMMIT!
>>37094040Nevah! Imma keep challenging everone till I prove I'm the best at life.I can beat you at anything, cromia!
Rolled 394 (1d1000)>>37094001yoooooo can i have someof that, thanks man
Rolled 4 (1d4)>>37094093>Bird: You turn yourself into a Sulfur-Crested Cockatoo for 1d4 days, but retain your self-control.holy crap, i'm a bird!
>>37094085>downs her tenth barrelEven swordplay? *hic*
Rolled 306, 919 = 1225 (2d1000)>>37094100Thank you Soros.Now, time to drink some more!
>>37094073*casts a fire breath spell into the air to burn the taste out of his mouth*
>>37094109Dude are you high, give me som of *hic* that
>>37094114Vex has never held a sword in her lifeFuck yeah! Won't be a problem for the magnificent Vex.
>>37094126I CAN STILL TASTE IT DAMMIT!
>>37094145*discreetly casts regeneration spell on Vex.*Now where did we put the barrel of dragonfire whiskey?
>>37094122*face palm*>>37094114>>37094145*grabs popcorn*>>37094155<neutralize base>
>>37094174Thank you Marus. You're so fluffy and wonderful.
>>37093656I am glad there are torture pits here, it will remind me of home and the adventurers we would keep having to throw in our dungeons, ha ha. Ha. I will practice healing them for tomorrow. Oh yeah, and mum wanted me to ask you if she would be able to visit me every day? She wants to teleport inside the guild, but she doesn't know if she'd be allowed to.Anyway, where am I to be stationed? I am tired. And I need to charge my scrying-mirror so I can play more tussle of tribes in the morning.
*the banshee wails**still burns**still not polimorphed*
>>37094114>>37094145Dont accidentally kill her Cromina.>>37094178Gah! Finally! Thank you Soros! *drinks from his bottle of Valen Silver*Thats better... *mutters about alcomancy apprentices*
>>37094145Ah, I like a woman with shome shpirit! More satisfaction when you make her your pershonal bitch. Here, have my, my, my, hic! My shword and prove yourshelf!>cromia pulls an halberd out of nowhere and point it into the general direction of. She is utterly drunk
>>37094206Do you want your mother to visit? If you do, she can visit in the evenings for dinner.If no, absolutely not and I will render her down to nutrient slurry if she impugns on my territory.You can have room #5 in the apprentice quarters in my tower.
>>37094240Alright, if I outsword you, then I'm gonna strip you of your knightishness and downgrade you to apprentice in my classes!How do you want to roll this? Both are plastered, but Vex is very inexperienced with melee weapons
>>37094206Teleports are fine with us. Your bunk will be in the students wing, drop this into your shadow when you feel like going to bed and it will guide you there. *hands you a piece of paper covered in complex runes*
Rolled 8, 10 = 18 (2d10)>>37094122>a gate is opens to a random plane 50% of a extra-planar creature to appear, someone pick a plane>Gort is shot with 1d10 darts second dice if for the extra planar creature, 6+ means a visitor
>>37094222*picks up* I already put out the fires. the last one someone else will have to help you with.>>37094240>>37094286<Time stop> *replaces all the metal weapons with very realistic foam replicas.>>37094305Baator
>>37094290>>37094206>>37094255Or at least it would be in the student wing until you get a sponsoring wizard. The shadow can guide you there to.
>>37094324Smart move. I kek'd.
Rolled 9 (1d20)>>37094286Your blood will, hic, will stain my halberd! cromia is drunk and depressed about what happened two threads ago, let us say it is an even fight.
>>37094337>>37094343<Time restart> *sits down and starting watching with popcorn in hand*
>>37094343what happened two threads ago? did i miss something important?
>>37094370She hit on me after revealing she was a warlock, I'm in a committed relationship and turns her down, she was so clingy I nearly got strangled. Yes she was drunk.
Rolled 15 (1d20)>>37094343Let's do best two out three then, since both are clumsy right now. I'd feel wrong if Vex beat you in one go despite having no prior experienceMy blood is *hic* bad weapon paint, and you should buy your wares from a professional smithy.
>>37094141>Swoops down with the cup of dish soap in his talonsHoly shit. I'm a falcon.
*And all day and all night and everything he sees isJust blue like him inside and outsideBlue his house with a blue little windowAnd a blue Corvette and everything is blue for himAnd himself and everybody around'Cause he aint got nobody to listen: ...I'm blue (da ba dee...)I'm blue (da ba dee...)*
>>37094397More like a parakeet. *pulls out a mirror*
>>37094324>BaatorSo we have a demon in the guild hall then?>a devil from Baator steps out of the portalHey, you guys having a party over here or something?
>>37094419Hello there, drink?
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>37094397Hahaha>>37094395>>37094343>Cromina trips up and falls on her rump. Vex "wins" the first "round"See, I'm superior even at swordliness!>next "round"
>>37094395>nearly loses her weapondo no, not, not insult my weapon crafter, hic. That is myself. I will chop yer head off!
>>37094393Oh i was there then.>>37094397In the sense that both are birds, you are close.In any other sense, nowhere near one.>>37094419It wouldn't be the first time.Indeed we are, care for a drink?
>>37094419Something like that. Want to watch two drunk chicks sword fight with foam weapons? *passes popcorn*>>37094409I've been replying.>>37094442>>37094443*popcorn intensifies*
>>37094255Oh no, I don't object to mum visiting at all...I just wish she wouldn't teleport behind me to make sure my cape is warm enough when I'm with my friends. Visiting during dinner will be cool.>>37094290Thanks. I will go to bed, now. See you all in the morning! And I will tell my mother she can visit. Good night!Seriously, good night. I'm going to play some CK2 and then turn in for tonight. It's been fun...
>>37094442Too drunk to roll well
>>37094455Goodnight, happy new year, enjoy your game, and welcome to the Mages' Guild
>>37094455Good night, Happy Years End!
>>37094437>>37094453Sure thing mortals, what's the strongest you got?>>37094454Drinks and a show, you guys know how to throw a party. Any chance one of them will kill the other?
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>37094468
>>37094486Nope, but they might have a wardrobe malfunction.>>37094442>>37094487Hah a tie! Roll again you two!
>>37094454 just singing internally
>>37094442>>37094487MY SIDES>>37094486*hands barrel of dragonfire whiskey* Here you go, drink on 3?1.2.*starts drinking*
>>37094486Probably some sort of enchanted dish soap. *scoffs*If you care for quality, i can spare a bottle of my Village's brew.
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>37094496>both of them stumble and fall simultaneouslyohw, ohw, ohw, I am soooo gonna hic, gonna wreck you...
>>37094504Well that's a shame, a fight is always better when the blood flows.>>37094507>chugs the entire barrel in one go>>37094522Soap? That's an odd drink, I'll try your village's brew.
Rolled 1 (1d20)>>37094504Alrighty then. Pray you win, knight, or I'm makin you a permnent fixture in my classes.>>37094530If I tie with you again, I'm making out with you
>>37094538Pfwahahaha, you drank the wyvern mucus!
>>37094545Vex you critfailed......... make something up.>>37094538Eh mortal plane, sides we might see something good.
>>37094538Here you go. *tosses him a bottle of Valen Silver*
>>37094453Are you trying to give birds a worse name than they already have? Has Pigeon Poopenheimer not done enough?
Rolled 6 (1d20)>>37094545>cromia sweep her halberd and trips vexoh, oh, hic, wait, this has not even, not even, hic, begun! Ready to be bisected? my sides. Deal.
>>37094549Well I believe the joke is on you, it was quite enjoyable.>>37094572One can hope.>>37094584Alright, let's hope it's good.>empties the bottle in one go
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>37094572>Vex is struck hard in her tushy by the staff of Crimina's foam halberd. Sending her into the table, shaking over a barrel of mead.>Vex is drenched in booze. Should have worn something under her blouse.Blech!That's it! Imma spank you so hard after this!
>>37094635Well, I needed to get rid of it, so really we both win. Let me know if you want more.>>37094639Oh, wow. Party and a show.
Rolled 5 (1d20) I should probly get out of comatose to see this, rolling for Jesus(if dice hits 20, jesus gets me out of the slumber)
>>37094639>cromia chages and slips on the beer that is flowing out he barrels vex broke, hitting her head on the ground and dalling unconscious.
>>37094639>>37094603Guess her getting soaked was the edge she needed to distract Cromina and win. Nice show don't you think?>>37094635>>37094671<wake>
>>37094603>>37094639Yes! I out-sworded you! Your body belongs to me now!
>>37094702Wait, that's how it works?
>>37094702>stil unconsciousuhhhh... mrhgh...
Anything happened, while I was...were was I... Why I am wearing this nice armour...NICE
>>37094702*still eating popcorn*>>37094635Wait for it!>>37094724<Waken>
>>37094719Yeah, I think you just the pointy end into the other guy. I didn't think swords were so foamy, though.Whatever. Cromina's mine now.
>>37094745Interesting... Think it works with claws too?
>>37094663Sure, that stuff stung pretty nicely, hand me another barrel if you got one.>>37094690I would have preferred some blood but I guess it's pretty good for a nonleathal duel.>>37094740>pays close attention to the fight
>>37094755No... you take weapon in claws and then swing it!
>>37094755If you want to duel, I can oblige Marus. I doubt Vex or Cromina is in any shape to fight you right now. >>37094745So Vex what are you going to do with your prize?
>>37094724Cromina, wake up! I still have to put you through your punishment game!
Rolled 9 (1d20)>>37094769oh, how abot I will summon you gr8est drink I could aver find!
>>37094809Do you even know how to use a sword Soros?
>>37094740Uh-I screwed up fer good didn't I->>37094702WHAT? No way!
>>37094823*summons rabbit *, that's nice one.>>37094834 HOW WANTS TO FIGHT?! *Stands up with the bane posture*
>>37094844That's right, Cromina. Now, get out of that armor. Henceforth, you'll be Eldritch Squire Cromina, my teacher's pet.
>>37094809I'm not sure I can even hold a sword to be honest Soros.I have this old warhammer though.
>>37094834While I am fairly lacking in the strength department without the aid of spells, I can fence. In addition I have my spheres of death. Kinetically reinforced bouncy balls>>37094844Yes you did.>>37094873Can't alst more than a week as per guild by law 17.>>37094882Fair enough.
>>37094892>>37094882I will fight both of you!
Looks like we are one thread away from falling off page 10, I'm assuming that means we are done for tonight. Or are people having to much fun to stop and it's time for overtime part 2?
>>37094892>Can't alst more than a week as per guild by law 17.Wha?
Sorry I was in the bathro-WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!>Putting his right arm behind his backShield your eyes baby mimic!
>>37094769and you too satan
>>37094915I'll be up until American midnight, so I was kind of hoping for a part 3 if anyone else is willing or able
>>37094863Hell, if everyone else is fighting, i guess I will give it a go.*pulls a sword out of his shadow*>>37094915lets keep it going so us Americans can celebrate new years with the guild
>>37094910Hmm, sounds fun.>>37094941I'm having fun but I think you need more than 2 people
>>37094873Uh, slip put pf me armor, no way, lass, no way, not going to, to, to be, hic yer squire...>>37094892Soooros... I fucked up roooyally... I am no good at magic, no good at fighting, and no good as a person... hic... I want to die...
Rolled 5, 12 = 17 (2d20)>>37094943m8*summons sword and strikes James*
>>37094963Well, you're really good at drinking. That may have somethin to do with it.
Rolled 14, 9 = 23 (2d20)>>37094978
>>37094991Sh,sh,sh,shut the hell up, I am not gonna c-cry... sniff. Hic.
>>37094910Your funeral kid.>>37094915I won't make a new thread but I'm still here if anyone ants to continue.>>37094917Any longer lasting punishments would interfere with her ability to teach her department.>>37094963You got tripped cheer up.
Rolled 6, 2 = 8 (2d20)>>37094978>>37094999*parrys, but misses his attempt to counter*
>>37094963Hahaha! hic– you can't excape my clutches!>glomps you and starts unlatching your armor.You can get your groove back by being my *hic* squire pet!
>>37094941>>37094943>>37094955I'm in as well then, these threads usually last until a bit later anyway.
>>37095024wow the dice are not my friends today
>>37095015There there Chromie, you're really good at fighting, and you know the most practical spells I've ever seen.
Rolled 5, 5 = 10 (2d20)>>37095024*strikes but James parry*, oh , not this time!
>>37095022Just for a little bit, then. And only when she's not busy.
>>37095028Nay, let, let, lemme goooo!>>37095022And what, what should I care, hic! I am a complete and, and utter, sniff, failure, waaaaahhhh!
Rolled 16, 9, 11 = 36 (3d20)>>37095024>>37095051>That fight is tight, none can land a good hit.I just need another sword!*Summons second sword and start to hit with both*
>>37095059*thumbs up* Carry on.>>37095068I really hate using enchantment but I dare say you could use a pick me up. Besides I suck at this sort of thing. <Ecstasy>
The fight seems to be over, thanks for the booze and show, I'll be heading back to Baator now.>steps over Gort and heads through the portal
>>37095091Wait Satan! I will wrek you, you just wait, till i fin
Alright, I'm gonna make the next threadBRB
Rolled 14, 10, 17 = 41 (3d20)>>37095051*Goes to strike, but the swords cross and scrape together*>>37095087If you insist. *another sword shoots out of the shadow into Jame's left hand*
>>37095090>eyes widen>arms start trembling...
>>37095132Uhh Soros, what's that spell usually for?
Ah, revenge is a wonderful thing. I have returned!>>37095068This again? I thought we already reassured you that you weren't a failure.>sighs and walks up to CrominaWould you feel better if I let you hug me?