I have a storytime from a Dark Heresy group that consists entirely of Guardsmen that I’d like to share if there’s interest tonight.This is a followup to a previous storytime which was surprisingly well received by you folks, it can be read here:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/33660810/This is going to be a little long, so I’m going to wait and confirm interest before I start spamming the boards. Otherwise I’ll just hold off until the weekend.>If anyone else has stories to share from their groups I’d love to hear them, I hate feeling like I’m the only one here.
>>34095013Screencap of previous story.
Got to go to bed, but please post so that I can follow it up in the morning.
>>34095013Eh tuesdays aren't the best days for this sort of stuff. I'm only here between CS:GO matches, and there's already a DH thread up and running.if you wanna be the center of attention (lol) wait for a friday or sat. TG doesn't really go for big storytimes on weekdays
>>34095208That makes no sense, everyone I know is usually doing shit on Fri/Sat evenings, like playing with their groups or VG or drinking. I could sort of see during the day sat, but weekday evenings are the best time to be on /tg/ imo.
>>34095013Just do it, storytime is always welcome and if no-one responds you can just stop posting and try again later.
>>34095191>>34095673>k, will start dumpingSo last time the surviving remnants of a regiment of IG found themselves the guests of Ordos Xenos. Several guardsmen were found to be harboring Genestealer infection and purged, but the remainder were given the opportunity to continue to serve the Imperium as soldiers of the Inquisition. So no shit there we were, 37 guardsmen who just graduated the Darwin school of veterancy, on an Inquisition ship getting told that our lives would now consist of hanging out with just about the scariest people of the imperium and doing whatever they told us to.Serving in the Inquisition is not a very normal job, as in there’s no way of knowing how things will work, because Inquisitors have so much leeway in how they do things that every one runs things in their own unique way. You might get an Inquisitor who likes to travel around following rumors and hanging out with Heroes of the Imperium and find yourselves acting as the ‘cavalry’ when they get into trouble. You might get an Inquisitor who is really into research, and wind up spending all your time guarding an incredibly disturbing science facility. You might get an Inquisitor who hangs out playing psychic nursemaid to a band of spies, and end up being used as a meat suit by your boss when you’re not skulking in abandoned buildings. Or you might get the Inquisitorial equivalent of a Pokemon Trainer.
>>34095748I suppose that Pokemon Trainer isn’t the best way to put it, Pokemon Professor might be better. Our Inquisitor collected teams from across the sector and handed them out to Interrogators who needed to get their feet wet leading a team. This was actually a pretty important role, not every Inquisitor has time or men to spare when an apprentice Interrogator is ready to move on, so our boss would set them up with a team and mission and keep an eye on how they did. He had a real name, but we all called him Professor Oak.So Oak had a fair number of recruitment teams that wandered around looking for fresh meat, one of which was hanging around our battle with the tyranids checking for Genestealers and drafting guardsmen who wouldn’t be missed. We got packed up and sent along to Oak’s mobile base of operations and got put through a crash course in being an Inquisition Goon Squad. Then we got split into squads of 5 or 6, partnered up with a some combat-light teams, and handed out to dewy eyed Interrogators like the 40k equivalent of a bulbasaur.
>>34095013just do it, if its good, people will screencap it
>>34095841>Notes on GameplayWe were playing as the Guardsmen, everyone else was handled by the DM. Each team was filled out to 10 by other classes leaning towards the non-combat side. So more Adepts, Psykers, and Tech-Priests than the other classes, but there was some of everything in each group as well as the Interrogator, who could be pretty much anything. We worked with our DM to split our survivors up into 7 groups, then he tacked on the sheets for our NPC associates, gave us a very vague overview of what each group’s assignment was, and asked us which one we wanted to play as. The groups we didn’t play as would all do their own mission and the survivors would meet us when we got back to base.Of the seven teams:Three teams were checking on Suspected Genestealer Activity. We passed on that, we were done with nids for a while.One team was checking out Xenos Tech appearing in use on imperial world and another was checking out and another was following rumors of some sort of new Psychic Drug. We passed on both of these as well.Finally two teams were checking out Suspected Cultist Activity in a Pilgrim Fleet. This sounded pretty nifty so we went with it.We’d be playing only one of the two teams, the second team would be sort of in limbo, doing its own thing, but could be called for support or replacements. (We interpreted this as a sign that our DM expected some of us to die on this one). Our roster consisted of 5 Guardsmen, 2 adepts, 1 tech-priest, 1 cleric, 1 SoB, and our Interrogator was a former Cleric.
>>34095013OP, what rank were your guys in various parts?How the fuck did you guys manage to lose 100 PCs? How long did you play to do that?
>>34095904That was a marathon weekend session, so Friday night, all Saturday and all Sunday.I've only played OW once and DH twice, so these figures may be off, but we started the first battle at minimal exp, then were given 800ish for each battle after that. In DH we started at around 2000ish? the amount where you're considered to be a sergeant.I'm sorry for being imprecise, we did this all on paper (we're old sorry) and the DM is holding all the sheets since we all travel to his place in rural CO to play. I'm downloading pdfs of the books now to verify.
>>34095871So imagine you’re a guardsman that’s just been recruited, fought a brutal campaign that wore down your regiment, watched the remainder of that regiment get taken out by tyranids, then found yourself in the hands of the Inquisition. Then the Inquisition purges a few of your buddies, gives you an Offer You Can’t Refuse, ships you through the warp, and dumps you into a really creepy bootcamp. Finally they split you and your remaining buddies up into squads, then introduce your squad to some weird lookin guy who seems far too excited to see you, and tell you to do everything he says. Now you’re hanging out in a bunch of passenger cabins on a navy ship going god knows where with a few of your buddies, an Interrogator, three nerds (one of which is more metal than meat), a priest, and a psychotic blond bombshell wearing armor that’s probably worth more than all of your squad’s gear combined. We were just a little weirded out.Our merry band consisted of a cynic, a nervous med student, a lazy bastard, a shameless thief, and a paranoid by the names of Sarge, Doc, Heavy, Nubby, and Twitch. Technically the others were part of our band as well, but quite frankly we wanted nothing to do with any of them (with the possible exception of the Sister, and only in the hypothetical sense).
>>34096054Our Interrogator and the others spent the entire journey going through the files that Oak had sent along, planning how they would hunt down the suspected cultists, sorting out who had contacts where, and brushing up on the exact flavor of the Imperial Cult that dominated the pilgrim fleet. We paid just enough attention to establish that we would be on ships the whole time and that we were not expected to actually do anything strenuous unless everything got fucked up. Then we played cards and slept a lot. Some people might say that two months is a long time to play cards and take naps, but those people have never served in the guard (and Sarge made sure we kept up on our PT and combat drill, so it wasn’t ALL sack time). By the end of the trip we were well rested and ready to stretch our legs, whereas the other half of the team were wound up like springs and developing new conspiracy theories every few minutes.We finally arrived at the Pilgrim Fleet which, as we understood it, was a bunch of ships full of hardcore zealots on their way to a world they considered holier than normal to pray, sight see, and generally replace the population that an Ork Waagh had recently removed. They had some sort of deal with the Ecclesiarchy to provide extra transports and fleet escorts, so it was basically just an Imperial Colonization fleet, except everyone was a little bit (see a lot) crazier than usual. They were hanging out in orbit around a Hive World refueling, refitting, and gathering more pilgrims. The Nerds and Nuts (as we called them outside of their hearing) were pretty sure that a chaos cult had infiltrated during either this stop or a previous one and was planning to do something very evil, probably with Geller Fields, or Daemons, or Plagues, or Heresy. We operated on the assumption that they would tell us when they figured it out. Anyhow our ship joined the fleet escort and a bunch of voxing and liaising started.
>>34096133Our job was generally pretty simple: we were there to stand guard, look menacing, and always be ready to kick some ass. If The Boss went somewhere official we’d slap an =][= badge on and flank him like good little goons, if The Boss went somewhere unofficial we’d leave the badge off and slouch a little, truly we were masters of disguise. Whenever the Nerds and Nuts took shuttle trips to look up leads or meet contacts at least one of us would tag along to watch their back or be on hand as backup, except when the Sister visited other Sororitas, we weren’t invited on those trips. When we weren’t on duty we each had our own little pastimes: Sarge would worry about what insanity our superiors were planning, Doc would read his beginners guide to medicine, Heavy would sleep, Nubby would wander around looking for small objects no one would miss (he did this while on duty too), and Twitch would obsessively craft tripwire traps and drink recaff. Twitch and Nubby didn’t exactly endear themselves to the locals, but supply and perimeter defense are important parts of being a guard, so we didn’t mind.Things were going pretty well for us, no one was shooting at us, the rations were good, it didn’t rain on us when we stood guard, and no one outside of our Team yelled at us to do stuff. Occasionally we’d have to make a show of force or beat the shit out of someone who tried to mug one of our nerds, but in the first weeks the most excitement we had was when our cleric got in a ‘religious debate’ and we had to pistolwhip the other debater until he put down the flamer.
>>34096004k.I read what you posted last night. It's a pretty good story. This actually happened? Meltaguns & heavy bolters didn't help? Will your guys get better access to gear now that you work for the Inquisition? I forget what the OW equivalent to Infamy is. By the way, there are a few DH conversions to OW. So you could have just kept your sheet without having to redo it.
>>34095748>>34095841>>34095871>>34096054>>34096133Holy shit dude slow down, I can't read that fast. Give us a little longer between posts if you're going to wall-of-text like this
>>34096252dont bitch about someone actually being prepared
>>34096213Eventually they must have figured something out because we all rebased to a single pilgrim ship and made ourselves the guests of the captain. While everyone else was running around saying things like ‘The game is afoot’ and ‘We almost have them’ and ‘I can practically smell them’ Sarge had us gear up and get ready for everything to go ploin-shaped. The cavalcade of fuckups started with one of our nerds finding a Chaos Tome in a collection of holy relics and deciding that it was inquisitorial duty to find out exactly what flavor of Soul Destroying Evil it was. Unfortunately Nubby was currently on babysitting duty and was not experienced enough to know that the correct response to someone doing this to hit them until they stop being stupid. Instead he called for backup (which is a pretty good response in any case) while he kept the priest who owned the relic collection covered. By the time backup arrived the adept was giggling and speaking backwards.Backup consisted of Heavy and Twitch as well as, unfortunately, the other adept and the cogboy. The two sane(ish) nerds decided the correct response here was to try and take the book away from the gibbering adept and started chasing him around the room. None of the guardsmen present felt comfortable taking the initiative here, so all three just covered the doors making sure no one entered or exited and stood there watching the demented game of keep-away. Then the gibbering adept finished the spell he had apparently been reciting and a minor daemon manifested.
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>34096252Slowpoke detected. Read faster. It's what subs train you to do, after all.
>>34096252Stop complaining and hand over the popcorn
>>34096488Wait, when the hell did /tg/ dice change?>>34096472This is getting good.
>>34096226Our gear was completely standard for all of the OW session. We started to get better weaponry from the Inquisition after the end of this mission (aside from what Nubby managed to acquire), but you'd be amazed how much 4 lasguns and a stubber can do against non-armored targets.Also I did not know about the conversion system, I really just do what my DM says, since I went into the system fresh.
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>34096609Dunno. But it'll keep dice rolls honest now I guess. No more 1d1.
>>34096472This galvanized us nicely and all three of us started pouring las fire into the thing before it could do anything. Unfortunately the priest we’d been covering took the chance to run for it, then the gibbering adept followed him out the open door, then both our nerds gave chase, and now all four were running through a room full of pilgrims. The Priest was screaming about heretics and daemons, the adept was screaming about the Glory of Chaos, and the nerds were still trying to wrestle the book away. The pilgrims mobbed the insane adept and tore him and the book apart in seconds, then started chasing the nerds with similar intent.The cogboy apparently took charge and decided that not being torn to pieces was the better part of valor. He decided that the safest place to hide from a mob of maddened imperial zealots was with the cogboys who kept the ship running. The nerds ran all the way to the ships engine rooms with a steadily growing mob at their heels baying for blood. The tech-priests let them in and closed the door behind them, but the mob refused the disperse and settled in to siege them out.Meanwhile the heroic guardsmen shot the minor daemon until it stopped moving, then stomped on it until it stopped being solid. That done we went to check on the runners and saw the mob chase them out. We decided to kick the problem upstairs and forted up while we waited for further orders. Eventually our Cleric and Sister arrived with Sarge and Doc in tow, and The Boss voxed us all. We gave our report, the nerds were voxed and gave theirs, then The Boss gave us our orders. Us guardsmen were to secure the relics and demonic remains, the Nuts were sent to talk to the pilgrims’ leadership to get the mob dispersed, and The Boss would talk to the Captain and get some support sent down. This sounded like a pretty good plan, but by this point we’d started to suspect that we were the only competent people on the team and what happened next proved us right.
>>34096678Our Interrogator marched up to the Captain of an Imperial vessel and ordered him to drop out of the fleet and put the ship into lockdown, this did not go over well. While our Interrogator was an agent of the Inquisition and had the rosette to prove it, he was NOT an Inquisitor and the Captain of an Imperial vessel is generally considered to be second only to the Emperor by their crew. He managed to insult the Captain in about six different ways in three sentences, which resulted in him getting his ass thrown in the brig until he remembered his manners. The Captain then sent us a brief message instructing us to “sort out any problems with the Cargo” without bothering him or his crew. While we were digesting this new development the Cleric and the Sister got jumped by the cultists we’d been looking for.Luckily the Sister and Cleric were heavily armed, incredibly paranoid, and far more level headed in an emergency than the nerds were. They fought a retreat to the Sororitas enclave that kept watch over this ship-load of pilgrims and dug in. Unfortunately the only other Sororitas in this enclave were Hospitallers and some other non combat orders, so while they could handle a bolter they weren’t suited to breaking out against the besieging cultists. To put it simply, they were stuck until help came, just like our adept and cogboy. It was down to us to pull everyone’s asses out of the fire and take care of business before things got any worse.
>>34096753So no shit there we were, a bunch of ordinary guardsmen on a spaceship full of crazy pilgrims and cultists. Our boss was in the brig until the Captain was no longer pissed at him, our Nerds were trapped behind a mob that wanted to burn them as heretics, our Nuts were pinned down by a bunch of actual heretics, and it was OUR job to fix everything. Sarge took command of the situation and started going through the Imperial Guard NCO Disaster Response Checklist.>Step 1: Secure the perimeter>Step 2: Determine chain of command>Step 3: Call for backup if needed>Step 4: Establish contact with friendlies>Step 5: Combine forces with friendlies and repeatStep 1 was already done, we had that perimeter locked down like nobodies business, there just wasn’t anything we actually cared about inside of it. Step 2 was trickier, because we were still in vox contact with some the Nerds and Nuts, but we solved that problem by saying something about vox interference and reducing the pickup range on our combeads until we could selectively ignore them. Step 3 was accomplished by asking the cogboy to get his ad-mech buddies to send out the contact code for the other Interrogator team that was looking at the fleet. Step 4 was already done as well, we knew exactly where the friendlies were, it was just that there was a bunch of cultists and an angry mob between us and them. All that was left was to get cracking on Step 5.
>>34096838We decided that all things considered the Cleric and Sister could use our help more and would provide more help in return so we went for them first. Also they were holed up with a bunch of hot nurses as opposed to creepy machine men. Unfortunately we still had our orders not to let anyone touch the demon goo or look for evil books, so we either had to split up (which was stupid) or get reinforcements (which wouldn’t be coming for a while) or use our initiative. So we tossed an incendiary grenade into the room and locked the doors and went to go rescue some hot nurses.Unsurprisingly the cultists had set up an outer perimeter to keep out any reinforcements, so after we established where they were we fell back and started looking for other options. Nubby put forward the idea that pilgrims seemed inclined to mob heretics, and these were definitely heretics, and why charge a fortified position when you can get someone else to do it for you. So Sarge found the nearest chapel and made a heroic speech about how the hot nuns needed our help and would probably be really grateful and suddenly we had our very own mob of zealots.
>>34096961The attack went more or less perfectly, the mob charged in from two directions and after the cultists started mowing them down we came in from a third direction and cut them down like the pros we were. At some point during this the Sister and Cleric pushed forward and the last of the resistance collapsed. Unfortunately the Sister and Cleric immediately started giving orders, and the entire mob redirected towards the section of ship where the cultists came from. Per force we tagged along, but none of us were exactly keen to be taking orders again, especially since the Sister’s plan seemed to consist of “Get ‘Em”. So while the Sister and the Cleric led the mob straight into a well prepared enemy position we appointed ourselves as the Hospitallers’ guards and hung around at the rear of the charge helping them pick up the wounded and watching for flankers.We fully expected the mob zerg rush to fail, a lightly armed force trying to press through a choke point into a fortified enemy position wasn’t going to work no matter how high their morale was, but we were unprepared for how hard it failed. The cultists had not only set up a very nice killzone at the single entry-point to their cargo bay, but they had also set up all sorts of runes and circles in the killzone. The wave-of-bodies attack resulted in a whole lot of people dying right on top of these runes so by the time the mob lost heart and started to retreat the cargo bay was practically filled with lesser daemons. The reverse in the flow of bodies was our cue to move to the front and lay down some covering fire.
>>34097156Give more details on hospitaller x Doc
>>34097156Emperordammit, this is why the sisters should be put in charge of ops.
>>34097156Luckily the daemons were equal-opportunity warp monsters, they spent as much time attacking each-other and the cultists as chasing down the last of our pilgrim mob and its two erstwhile leaders. Between the daemons’ lack of coordination and our covering fire the two nutters managed to hobble most of the way back to us, and Doc went out and dragged them the rest of the way to our lines and back to the Hospitallers. Between the two of them they had about three functional limbs and Doc spent the next few hours with the sisters patching them up.At this point Sarge re-assumed command and decided that containment and waiting for reinforcements was the best of the available options. So we fell back around the corner, set up a barricade and our heavy stubber, then settled in for the long haul. After a while the daemons ran out of cultists to eat and started to poke their noses around the corner, and were promptly shot in the face. This was old hat for us really, we could defend a barricade in our sleep (literally in Heavy’s case), and after a few initial rushes the daemons didn’t really seem that keen on leaving their cargo bay. We all fell into our usual roles and routines from the guard: Twitch stared at the edge of the killzone and fired whenever he thought something might be moving, Heavy went to sleep sitting up with his eyes open and finger on the trigger, Sarge went around yelling at people and worrying, Nubby went off to ‘acquire’ supplies, and Doc made eyes at one of the Hospitallers while they were both elbow deep in the Cleric’s guts.
>>34097332After a few hours of light trench duty (which was actually quite nice all things considered) our backup arrived. The second Interrogator team (which had been doing Emperor-knows-what all this time) showed up at our barricade and Sarge explained the situation. Once again command was handed off, but luckily the new Interrogator decided to leave Sarge in charge of the barricade while he went to talk with the Captain and convince him not to just void our section of the ship. Our little troop had been reinforced to ten guardsmen, two psykers, and another damned Cleric, so Sarge decided it was time to be proactive.Sarge wasn’t happy to have another Cleric around, and none us wanted anything to do with the two psykers, so the Cleric was put in charge of keeping them as far away from us as possible. A pair of grenade launchers were scrounged up from the other teams’ arsenal and Nubby’s ‘collection’. We started a walking barrage up the hallway and slowly advanced our entire barricade until it was at the edge of cargo bay. This wasn’t exactly the fastest way to clear out the daemon infestation but it was definitely the safest, not a single one of them managed to get within biting range of us. Once we were to the edge of the bay we just sat there and shot nades into it until we ran out, which took quite a while since Nubby could ‘acquire’ a surprisingly large amount of stuff. Eventually we ran out of grenades and had to clear the cargo bay the old fashion way, but by this point there wasn’t really any cover left in the bay at all so as long as we advanced slowly and carefully it was pretty easy to mow down the few remaining daemons before they got close. All in all it went pretty good, except for the big glowing shield thing at the back of the bay.
>>34097414>Giant glowing chaosy thing
>>34097414>big glowing shield thing at the back of the bay.
>>34097414The shield was big and glowy and evil looking, we could sort of make out the remaining cultists inside of it doing cultisty-things, but we had no desire to get close to it. Quite aside from its appearance, there were quite a few corpses near it that looked like they had been turned inside-out. We scientifically examined the shield for a while (which is to say we shot it with every type of weapon we had sitting around) then Sarge gave up and voxed the replacement Interrogator and the two adepts with him for advice. We got a long winded explanation that included a lot of terms like “ritual entropic shield” and “drawing power directly from the warp” and “energy based daemonic lifeform” and “attempt to psychically resonate with, then overwhelm the field” which boiled down “Go get the psykers to poke at it”. This was not the solution we were hoping for.We had all heard stories about psykers and had encountered a few chaos witches during one of our deployments, so none of us had any desire to be near our two psykers when they attempted to crack open the shield. With the exception of Sarge, the Cleric, and the other squad’s leader we all fell back as far as we could and got ready for everything to go wrong. Within a few seconds of the psykers walking towards the shield and getting all glowy everything went wrong. The first psyker screamed and was suddenly surrounded by a torrential downpour of blood, then the second psyker started growing wings and horns. We all promptly opened fire on the possesed psyker and quickly reduced him to a thoroughly charred corpse while Sarge decked the first psyker and drug him back to our barricade. Since one psyker was unconscious and the other was a pile of smoking ashes, we decided that it was probably time to figure out our own solution to the problem.
>>34097714Our ‘experiments’ had established that las fire and grenades didn’t do much to the shield, but since we were guardsmen we felt sure that enough faith and firepower could solve anything. We set up positions around the shield and started continuously plinking las fire into it (because when you have a fusion reactor to recharge your cells from you might as well lay down some indiscriminate suppressive fire), then sent Nubby and the Cleric to go ‘acquire’ as many explosives, holy artifacts, and priests as possible. While Nubby and the Cleric scrounged Twitch made a very good argument for setting up a blast shield, so we got the cogboy and his buddies (who were STILL under siege) to send down some servitors with big ol’ metal shipping crates and we built a big ass wall around the shield.When the supply run was finished and the blast shield was finished we more or less just dumped several wheelbarrows filled with holy symbols (turns out that “we’re going to use it to blow up some heretics” is a pretty persuasive argument) into the the walled area along with several barrels of prometheum. Then we got the priests to bless all the explosives we could scrounge (we’re not sure it helped, but at least it made them feel useful) and tossed them all into the blast area as well. Then we got as far back as we could, started a 10 second timer on the explosives and ran like hell.
>>34097889>That much explosives.I'd be surprised if you didn't blow a hole in the ship
>>34097889Holy fucking shit this campaign
>>34097889None of us were really sure if the ‘holy shrapnel’ helped at all, but when we came back there was nothing left of the cultists and their shield except a glowing puddle of molten metal and a series of dents in the walls that no amount of buffing would ever remove. At this point Sarge declared victory and we all went to get a snack, a nap, and a cup of recaff. After that was done with we decided it was about time to retrieve the rest of our team and get the hell off the ship before anyone else tried to get us all killed.We secured The Boss from the ship’s brig by turning the clean-up investigation over to the second Interrogator and promising to never bringing our boss back to the ship, ever. While he was escorted to the shuttle we chatted with some of the priests who helped us make our giant Holy Hand Grenade and got them to smooth things over well enough for us to get our adept and cogboy back. Finally we got our Sister and Cleric deposited in our shuttle’s infirmary (where they would stay until someone got them the 15 or so different augmetics they’d need to resume service) then went out to get drunk.We enjoyed a night of drinking with our friends from the other team as well as a few of more helpful pilgrim priests and our surviving nerds. The high point of this was us all giving Doc shit for being hung up on one of the Hospitallers then hauling his drunk ass down to their enclave and getting him to declare his undying love for her and her “dexterous hands and perfect stitching”. We hauled him away before he could devolve into soppy poetry, piled into our shuttle and called it a night. By the time we all woke back up we were docked with another navy transport and on our way back to the Pokemon Center.
>>34098080The trip back was almost exactly the same as the trip out, except we hung out with the cogboy a little more (he’d been pretty damn handy working with the ship’s tech-priests and handling our communications) and Doc had to spend half his time keeping the Sister and Cleric alive. The Boss just locked himself in his cabin with the remaining adept and worked on writing up his report for when he got back to Oak.When we finally got back to the Inquisitor’s ship we immediately went out and found the other survivors from our regiment. We all swapped tales of incompetent superiors, insane teammates, horrific enemies, and intense boredom until word came down that our Interrogator was being praised for his success and would be elevated to full Inquisitor. Everyone had a good laugh about this, and we joked about where he’d find himself imprisoned next, right up until we got word that he was looking for us with the intent to add us to his new retinue.We spent the next week or so hiding with the cogboy in the bowels of the ship while all of our buddies made up wild and conflicting stories about our untimely death, reassignment to a penal legion, imprisonment by the Ordos Hereticus, induction into the Astartes, etc. Eventually he left along with the adept and the Sister and Cleric (who were both more metal than your average tech-priest by this point), and we returned to our regiment’s little camp.
>>34098080Didn't the interrogator try to recruit you guys?How did you dodge that?
>>34098180After a few weeks of R&R (or as close as you can get on a fucking Inquisition battleship) a runner came down and told us we were being assigned to a new team under Interrogator such-and-such, and we were to report to our shuttle immediately. With a weary sigh we packed up our bags (or our overloaded wheelbarrow in Nubby’s case) and headed out to our transport. When we got to the shuttle the pilot helpfully informed us that “the Interrogator, his two assistants, and his three psykers” were already aboard. Twitch and Nubby both tried to run for it, but the shuttle’s hatch was already closed.So this chapter ends with our heroic guardsmen reluctantly entering the main seating area of the shuttle and meeting the rest of their team (one of which was giggling and chewing on a seat cushion), and receiving a briefing detailing how they had been assigned to go find out why a world hadn’t been supplying psykers to the Black Ships. We did not have a good feeling about this.
>>34098394>I didn't choose the guardsman lyfe, the inquisitor did that for me
>>34098394>Sending psykers to a world that has been withholding psyker tithes.NOPE. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING CAN GO WRONG.Oh god. You're fucked.
>>34098394>>34098180>>34098080>>34097889>>34097714>>34097414>>34097332>>34097156>>34096961>>34096838>>34096753>>34096678>>34096472>>34096213>>34096133>>34096054>>34095871>>34095841>>34095748Somebody screencap this! PLEASE!
>>34098394And that's all folks. Thanks for reading.We've played through the next mission, but it'll take a while for me to type that up.I'll try to go through your questions and answer them to the best of my ability.I'd also love to hear any other stories you folks have.
>>34098552Already archived.http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.htmlGo vote
>>34098651MORE STORIESAlso, namefag for this.Just incase i miss one of your story threads.
>>34098651This was pretty rad. Thanks anon.
>>34098675Well thanks for that, I'll go shamelessly vote for myself>>34098703Well I could dump my dnd campaigns screencaps, but you folks have probably seen them before.
You've made me a happy person tonight OP.
>>34098987Post them again
Out-Fucking-Standing, OP. Please, keep us updated. This is gold.
>>34099014>>34098987Well Here's the first one, Shoggy The Seldom Dog
>>34099174And the Tales From a High Mortality PartyStarting with Volg Causes a Paradox
>>34099270And Tommy Troll-Fucker
>>34099317And Mr Lily and the Potato of Faith
>>34099317And finally Shane the Shy
>>34099538Okay guys that's it except for a Shadowrun story about stealing drones that I'll try to dig out of my archives if we're still around at that point.I'm going to be going through the thread answering questions and chatting as long as I'm awake, and I really woudl appreciate some other storied if you folks got any.
>>34098520Well, not to spoil things, but between our psykers and theirs we saw 7 Perils of the Warp. Good times, after all what is DH without a roll for potential TPK on every psychic action.
>>34098703I guess I should, I've wound up with 3 archived threads since I started doing these writeups, I'm honestly surprised they've been so well received.I'll try to think up a name while I write up the next one, is it possible to update threads' tags on suptg?
>>34098185We more or less just hid from him in the bowels of the ship while all of our friends told blatant lies about where we were. We actually had to roll stealth, disguise, and blather to avoid being recruited into his retinue.The best part was Nubby (who was about as charismatic as a rotten banana) wearing a fake mustache and convincing the men the Interrogator had sent for us that Corporal Nubby had died and been elevated to sainthood for extreme smartness, prayulness and looking-good-itude.
>>34099174Holy shit your the Shoggy guy. I showed that story to my GF aand got her into gaming.You fucking rock man, I hope you keep playing and writing, storytime has been sorta meh since 2D stopped posting, glad to see some other people with literary talents are out there playing games.
>>34099846I think the only way to change something on suptg is to contact teh admin guy, and he's not really keen on doing anything except fixing blatant misarchiving, so I wouldn't worry about it.You've earned a namefag I guess if you want, but I wouldn't worry about trying to tag your old posts, you're new stuff is going to be jsut as good right?
>>34098025Well this was an Imperial Ship. It had floors and walls a few meters thick, and really we were only in a relatively minor cargo bay.I'm pretty sure that if this was in Rogue Trader this would have been considered a minor distraction instead of a full campaign
>>34099952So based on your previous posts I'm assuming that Nubby is an expy of Corporal Nobby Nobbs from discworld?You folks sure seem to like that series, and I think that Nobby is actually a pretty good fit for a guardsman, seems sort of like Jurgen from the Cain series.It'd be fun to port the Ankh-Morpork watch over to 40k and have them run around doing discworld shit all over the grimdark. Too many DH players and GM take things too seriously. 3 edgy 5 me man
In all honesty OP I love your stories. Feel free to post them as much as you can. Theyre definitely up there with TwoDee in my book!I mean it though, the way you convey them is just right. You sound like you really enjoy your group, and it is well you should do so.Rock on, mate.
>>34100719Thank you kindly! I've enjoyed playing with my group very much, we spent most of our teenage years playing together and it's been wonderful to get back together and play again.We more or less just realized that we all still wanted to play together and all had stable enough jobs that we could all take off for a weekend or two and meet up again.It's been quite fun returning to pen and paper games, and since my writing has been well received I intend to keep writing up our campaigns as long we keep playing them.>>34100662Yes, Corporal Nubby Nubbs was a blatant Discowrld ripoff. We've stolen so many characters from that series that it's practically second nature to try to cram them in whenever we see an opportunity.Nubby has actually done pretty well as the squad's unofficial supply officer. When he went to guard the Interrogator during a meeting he not only kept the mug his recaff was in, but he also took the sugar bowl, the spoon, and a pocket-full of slightly used grounds.His kleptomania has worked out for us though, because he generally exchanges everything he takes for more ammunition/weapons/rations at the earliest opportunity.Recently he has replaced his wheelbarrow with a cargo servitor. He's been stealing things that ARE bolted down now.
>>34101106Shouldnt your supply you all with good amounts of not-bad equipment?
>>34101184Well we had our armor, las-guns, hand grenades, and a few role specific items like Heavy's stubber or Doc's medkit. But Nubby supplemented that with stuff like the Grenade launcher (which he exchanged a few data-slates that had been unattended at the Interrogators last meeting for) and the prometheum barrels which had been property of the local priests right up until Nubby brazenly took them off for 'ficial purposes and smitin evil'.Nubby took care of all mid-mission resupply as it were, while we could buy stuff with our points at base, he could find weapons and gear just by wandering around.
>>34101690No, i meant your inquisitor.He never supplied you guys better equipment?
>>34101825Well after our first deployment we got a bit of an upgrade, but on that initial mission we didn't get jack.We got a standard guardsman's kit to replace our original gear, a crash course in being in the Inquisition, and instructions to use our initiative an request supplies from local authorities.Oak was not overly concerned with the mortality rate of the teams he sent out. After all, the final exam for becoming an Inquisitor was supposed to be hard.
>>34099538Okay here's one more screencap from the brief period of time when we played Shadowrun. I'm not sure that I was entirely sober when I typed this one up, but it looks good enough for storytime to me...
>>34095036That's some brutal shit. I wish our group had the commitment to stick around for more than three sessions in a row.
I haven't seen a screencap yet so here you all go:
>>34102352Well we'd played together for several years, then finally hauled our asses up to the middle of fucking nowhere CO to play a big ol' reunion game. We weren't going to puss out just because our GM likes to make us suffer.In fact evidence would suggest that we like it when he makes us suffer...That being said, if I went to a new group and they pulled shit like that, I probably would have walked after the third or fourth PC death.
Well I'm out for the night, I'll check back in if the thread is still up in the morning.It's been a blast posting this stuff, and I'll come back and do another dump after I finish writing up the next mission.
Bampu for sexcellent writeheterosexuality
>>34102921SavedIs there a tool out there for quickly doing caps, or do you have to actually take a screenshot of every single post and stitch them all together?The one time I tried doing it in paint it took me like an hour, so I'm pretty sure I'm doing something wrong
>>34095013>>34095036>>34095748>>34095841>>34095871>>34096054>>34096133>>34096213>>34096472>>34096678>>34096753>>34096838>>34096961>>34097156>>34097332>>34097414>>34097714>>34097889>>34098080>>34098180>>34098394Great storytime man, got to say after the start that had to be the most light hearted game of DH I've ever heard of.
>>34106995Get Gimp or Photoshop or some other image software that supports layers, it makes life much easier than using paint