Short recap: You accidentally stole your old roommate's identity and got released from jail.Also, I'd like to apologize for the many inconsistencies that have happened so far and will most likely continue to happen, such as a deaf character being able to hear a door knock. With that, let's begin.Alena Belyakov, formerly 606. You're filling up 607's position now. One of the benefits of working in a massive megacorp is that IDs are cleared out routinely and that no one pays attention to who's who, as long as you get the job done. This is your fifth time and third corporation, and likely not your last combination.For good measure, you're changing your appearance. This should get the commies off your back if you do it well enough. You dye your blonde hair brown, both to honor your old roommate and to make it harder for the infiltrators to find you. It probably won't be enough, but it's better than nothing.
>>33784764Get facial reconstruction surgery.
>>33784764Confirm your likes and dislikes in your head to make sure you don't change much mentally because of your new looks.
>>33785003>>33785119Just go the whole hog and get gender reassignment surgery.
>>33785175Likes: Mild hedonism, sci-fi entertainment, good food, getting laid, outsmarting the system, and seeing your enemies crumble.Dislikes: Kaguya... everything else is a bit foggy. You were just thrown in jail and released a few hours ago, after all.>>33785119>>33785253If you had that kind of money, you wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. Also, you're a fan of your current genitalia, to be honest.You mentally grumble over your lack of funds as you shut off your Prelestny Style-bot.
>>33785373Confirm who your enemies.
>>33785435All of them? It'd be easier to confirm who are your friends.... friends. Does your Style-bot count? As you put it back into the closet, you feel that something's off. A feeling of emptiness and slight sadness. What could it be?
>>33785593NOTHING. Burt your emotions.
>>33785649>>33785696Emotions? Feelings? Loneliness? Casual sex? What the hell are you talking about? You noticed that grey uniform #13 is gone. Not only that, but the window's open.That's right... the guards said something about the "real" 606 escaping. You did see two fascist agents running down the hallway being chased by Bull. One of them took a grey shirt off while the second was putting unconscious guards in compromising positions.Could that grey shirt be grey uniform #13? You didn't get a close look at the ground in the rush between one-sided gunfight and abandoning 203. But more importantly, why did two fascists specifically target your room and identity?
>>33785798Are you fascists? And do you need green eyes to further disguise yourself!?
>>33785852DISLIKE MEMORY ADDED: Contacts. They're pretty scary putting on your defenseless eye.DISLIKE MEMORY ADDED: Fascists. They did kind of start the forty-year long Great War that killed everyone from your childhood.HOLY SHIT YOU HEAD FEELS LIKE IT'S GONNA EXPLODE. WHY?LEVEL UP.Hateful stat has increased to 7.Deafness and muteness have increased and decreased to 1.You furiously press the confirm button to end the pain as quickly as possible. It's a nightmare getting through the separate text-boxes.
>>33786158Power level our Hateful status!How do you feel about communists?
>>33786158Stencil a 7 over your 606 uniforms.
>>33786403Your Style-bot is an expert in arts and crafts and could easily change the labels without any hints that such a change occurred. You direct it to do.>>33786223DISLIKE MEMORY ADDED: Communists. Nothing too personal, but a nationalistic educational system does wonders on a population.LEVEL UP.Still deaf!KNOWLEDGE GAINED.You can not develop natural physic powers.As the pain again subsides, you decide that you don't want to level up anymore.
>>33786620Go outside and get something to eat.
>>33786620Plan on getting back at that communist bitch Kaguya.
>>33786792>>33786824You are a bit hungry. Sushi? Revenge? Those two might go hand in hand.Your pager vibrates. It reads, "EMERGENCY BOARD MEETING: FASCIST DEFECTOR."Goddammit.
>>33786900>fail>old hair style is better hair styleJackboots? what kinda gal would go with jackboots to a PRELESTNY FASHION meeting? Get something with appeal.
>>33786953Indeed. Wow them with your style, even if it means being... fashionably late.
>>33786923Put on some sunglasses and go to the board meeting.
>>33786923>>33786981NO! We can't! But we can be fashionably on the dot!
>>33786953It's a uniform thing. Work-time, even if in a fashion company, isn't the time for wardrobe experimentation.>>33787000You're not Slick.>>33786981>>33787004All this talk of fashion only serves to make you feel a little more empty inside.The board room's got the whole gang plus three.
>>33787206Sit next to your date.
>>33787206Sit next to 405, we can use him as a meatshield when the need arises.
>>33787206>He's no longer your date.drag the chair to the center of the table, they don't know you, so maybe you can pass yourself off as a high-flying lady of PRELESTNY FASHIONS
>>33787245>>33787263Dragging a chair around would be calling attention. Just because you wouldn't be able to hear its scraping doesn't mean they won't.You grab the only available seat. You roll up your sleeve and activate your pager's automatic transcription. It's far from perfect, but you have little choice.Armband guy: "I did not Disneyland go to medieval funtime wonderland."Stanislav: "But when it's back to fingerpaint orange."
>>33787507Ask what's going on.
>>33787507Wow. That's pretty fucking awful. Read their lips.
>>33787507Creepily stare at them.
>>33787507Pretend to pay attention and sleep.
>>33787574Being mute and deaf wasn't a lifestyle choice.>>33787606Are you kidding? And pass up this possibly vital information you can't understand?>>33787588It's not awful! You paid 5 bucks for this app, and you're damn well gonna try to understand it.Armband guy: "But I'm a tree man now! I can help you with attacking the flacid base."Stanislav: "A seege? Now you're walking the lanjeege of Commercial Stanley."Manager: "A saige? Imp possible! The expenses, the numin lives, the violence! How could you even -"Stanislav: "Shut your Bonnie mouth, tank anger. I'm going with a small arm bee and annihilating all of their flacid skull with my bare hands."Armband guy: "I'll bassist you in the raid if it means finding my brother."That was just almost understandable. You think.
>>33787824Did you try turning it off and on?Also, check your inventory
>>33787824Look up the reviews for that app.
The flaccid terrorists? Sounds... underwhelming.>>33787921You think you remember hearing something about those reviewers being shot by corporate hitmen. The reviews must have been too positive.>>33787875Yes. Several times.INVENTORY: Emergency mobile phone. It's state of the art.
>>33788010Try to figure out what this means for us. Like, are we gonna be put on the raid team or is there a curfew or what?
>>33788109You consider this. A raid means total war against the fascist flaccid terrorists.And expect something come part 12!
OP, can you try to keep the pace going better? You have a lot of updates where we don't know what to do other than wait for stuff to happen. I know it's also on us to move the story along and inspire wacky shit too, like we could've said to turn on the projector and participate in the meeting or make shadow puppets or something. I don't know, but try to be more proactive when we're not?Anyways, thanks for the thread! It's always fun when I catch it.
I missed it?Well, nothing much happened this time.
>>33788672I really do need to work on pacing and moving the story along by itself. I tried to do that here too, and will continue working on it. But just because it's taking a long time doesn't always mean I'm waiting. It's usually drawing or changing up music.But yeah, that doesn't change the main problem: I apparently have trouble moving the plot forward and pacing anything. I suppose I'll look at guides on the internet for better Quest writing.Thanks for the constructive criticism, and it's nice to know people like it!>>33788678On the nearly random nights I pick (Saturday is the only one I can half-promise usually), I start at around 11 or 10:30 Eastern US time.
>>33788780I've followed the quest from the beginning.Not giving us options for what we can do can inspire creativity, but it can also make us meander quite a bit. Many QMs will give several possibly avenues of action at the ends of their posts. It can help move things along, or show us things we can do that we might not have considered.I've noticed you do also tend to respond to many posts with in character comments, but the posts don't necessarily have an influence on the character's actions. The comments are entertaining, but it seems like you're squandering input.
>>33789081I don't think it's squandering to choose what you want to write and draw. The alternative is to try to be as accommodating as possible and use every suggestion that isn't bumfuck stupid, but I think it get's in the way of good updates.
Think we could double up on this thread again? It's pretty short.
>>33792698That might be best.>>33789081>>33789247On the comments, I try to use them to hint at a sort of back-story, such as the Great War, 607's identity, and the society in general. Otherwise, it's for comedic value. If it is annoying, I'll try to keep the comedic ones on the down low.I'm considering putting sort of indirect choices, like hints. Sort of like... I'm not sure. I'll go check out some other quests and see what works and what doesn't.
>>33795248Does anyone have the link to the last couple threads? I missed them
People like to look out windows when they think. It's fact of human existence and cinematography. You find, to your surprise, several fascists on the new plexiglass.One of them didn't appear to know that the glass was bulletproof, and tried to kick his way in. The glass tipped over into the room with him sticking to it.Running seems like a valid solution.
>>33807667Let's get the fuck out.
>>33807667Grab the plant, it looks important.
>>33807667Alert the others.
>>33807847Facing your co-workers, you see that they're just as aware as you of the situation.>>33807810It'd take about ten minutes for your phone to start up. It's state of the art, not magic.>>33807789>>33807758You grab the plant and make towards the exit. Unfortunately, a fascist reels down from the ceiling like a majestic and racist spider.
>>33808017Kick him in the chin.
>>33795248Oh, please don't misunderstand. They're not annoying. They're part of your writing style, and part of what I enjoy about the quest.
>>33808017FIGHT. >PANICKED RAGE MODE, ENGAGE
>>33808017Break his visor.
>>33808127(Gotcha, buddy-o.)A red light coming from behind you tells you that the fascists already started zapping people. Who doesn't really matter, other than that COMBAT has begun.>>33808063>>33808146>>33808282His chin looks a little too far up for a kick. You do smash the potted plant on him though. You miss his visor, but it looks like you knocked him out. You don't know why you aimed for the visor, but there's more important matters to be dealt with.(1/2)
(Shit I meant 2/3)You didn't know that you were strong enough to knock out someone. You're kind of impressed. Then you're zapped in the back with a stun laser.
(3/3)Might I say that you're looking fine as hell today, Slick? You were right: Floor 12 has the cleanest bathroom in the entire building. Your brother must've been hogging them all to himself.In fact, you're thinking about giving him a piece of your mind right now. Or you could go impressing the ladies with your new style.
>>33808669Let's go hit on that fine 607 girl we saw walking in the hall earlier.She was heading toward that meeting with your idiot brother, right?
>>33808669Go around looking for fine pieces of ass.
>>33808699>>33808695607? Your ex-gf? She's been gone from this place for a long time, kiddo. You didn't meet anyone on the way to the bathroom, as you've been in here for the past hour admiring yourself and the divine scented candles.You doubt the board room has any ass, but you know what they say.When ye hunting for the booty, anything's possible."While you're walking there, something feels off. You check your breath. No, it smells fine. What could it be? This hallway sure is dark for some reason.
>>33808907It's probably dehydration. Go get some water.
>>33808907There's probably someone above you. Tumble forward and strike a cool pose on the ground to impress them.
>>33808950People who try to sneak up on you are just sad fools.>>33808948You feel hydrated, but it doesn't ease the tension.
>>33809062Spin on your heel like a smooth dancer, since nobody's around to see you practice.
>>33809062Use your mad skills to locate the nearest fine ass.
>>33809165One spell use a day, pal.>>33809157You have been working on you dance skills. You heard that it helped people get laid. You spin. Seconds later, you find out that getting grabbed by the collar hurts."Are you a fascist?" the ninja dude says through a disguised voice.Man, this guy is being rude as hell.
>>33809236This guy doesn't even know what a fascist looks like? I'm surprised anyone let him have a knife.Say no?
>>33809236Tell him you're a lawyer, and you're suing him for assault.
(1/2)>>33809352>>33809527"Fat ass? Are you trying to say that the Slick's body been taking it easy? Cause the Slick's been working out his pelvis like no other. I'm suing you for assault, by the way," you say to the man with a knife at your throat.He lets go of your collar and puts his knife away. He gives a one-sided handshake."... I'm here to save people," he says."Save people?""Yes. From the fascist assault that happened a few minutes ago.""What fat ass result?""The one on the news.""How could you get here so quickly to manhandle poor Slick if it happened a few minutes ago?""I guessed using the aircraft's movement patterns." He points out the window.
(2/2)It's a giant, flying swastika. It's been a long time since you've seen one of those, and by long time you mean never.The ninja pats you on the shoulder. "I'm making good time. If they started shooting us, that meant they already loaded their next brainwashing victims. Where are the hostages being kept?""Listen here, Renaissance man, I didn't even know there was a goddamn siege going on a few minutes ago. How would I know where they're keeping the dudes?"Now that you think about it, one of the hostages might be your brother. Mom would probably get mad at you if you left him to die. Still, this ninja doesn't seem like the best drinking partner. You could just go home and type up a lawsuit against the Fascist Freedom Fighters later.
>>33809798Pull off masked man's mask. You can't sue who you don't know.
>>33809894You miss a quick swipe at the ninja's mask when everything around you shakes like a bad dancer."SIEG... HEIL" booms throughout the building. The echo probably blasted into an alternate universe.If it didn't, the giant laser probably did."Shit, they teleported the hostages? Who's funding them?" the ninja says. He grabs your shoulder. "Are you a good shot? I'll need back-up for what's about to happen next.""Hey baby, I can do the kinkiest shots. One time I -""Are you coming or not?"Seems that you have a split decision to choose. This building could give at any second.
>>33810005Girls like heroes, right? Let's go beat up fascists.
>>33810005All the ladies will want you if you save them. Even if we don't do much, just take credit for whatever ninja man does.
>>33810005Go with the ninja.ADVENTURE!Slick should scream "ADVENTURE!"
>>33810103>>33810183>>33810208This are excellent ideas! Oh man, you're thinking about the women right now. There'll be a blondie, a brunette, a redhead, a -Oh look, ninja man just pushed you out of a thirteen-story building. Adventure? You let out a manly war cry of "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA", which is close enough.As you contemplate your impending death, ninja man grabs you by the waist and grapple hooks a fighter jet. Metal Gear Rising OST is blasting through his earphones.It doesn't take long for him to hijack the jet and throw out the two pilots. They both activate their parachutes before they hit the ground dead.You're having second thoughts about this. Are you sure this is the best idea?
>>33810339Better than dying.
>>33810339We cannot risk this opportunity. We can't risk THE BOOTY.
>>33810339What are you? Chicken?
>>33810392>>33810421>>33810448URGH.Ninja dude opens a hole in the flying swastika. He then flies the entire jet into the hole. You can't see his face, but you assume that he was just as tense by how tight his grip was on the flying stick. He turns around to you."Alright, I think there's gonna be about fifty crewmen on board, all armed. I think our best bet will be to land this thing with all the hostages on board and all the fascists off. Are you ready?"This plane is cooking you alive.
>>33810674Loosen your shirt
>>33810674Misquote a coolguy from your favorite action movie.
(Apologies. Photoshop just crashed. Next post will be last one for tonight anyways. Allow a bit more time to redraw.)
>>33810749The only words that escape your lips are mumbles. Your mind's a bit cloudy from mild head trauma. You feel old and exhausted. This must be how your brother feels constantly."Hey ninja man, the Slick needs to take a breather," you say."Go ahead. I have to coat my knife with poison anyways. I think we have a couple seconds before they send guards in here."With that, part 12 will arrive either tomorrow night or the next. Sleep well, people. If you're living on the other side of the Earth, good morning.
>>33811130Thanks OP! Great thread, better then yesterday.Do you have plans for robot arms guy to show up again?
>>33811231To be honest, I haven't planned out too many character specifics. I have a vague idea of a bunch of arcs/acts in the future, and this is still only the first one. I can say that Detective Robo Arms will probably show up again.
>>33811291We're still under a hundred posts, and the bump limit is 300. Want to stretch it for another day?
Eh, I'll give it one more bump, see if anyone else feels like reusing the topic again. If not, I'll let it drop.