http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=neckbeard+questPrevious threadsIf you wish to switch character files, even number must simply suggest PAUSE, FILE SELECT. You may second even numbers in hopes your post lands an even number.---You are currently Yorick. It will only be another 10 minutes before your train reaches it's destination.
In order to possess your victim, you must have mouth to mouth contact. Unconsenting victims will result in a temporary time.
>>33275960Stop breathing and wait for mouth to mouth respiration.
>>33275990"Your friend stopped breathing, is she okay?""Yeah, she'll be fine. She doesn't have lungs!"
>>33276119Yorrick: Roll to seduce.
>>33276119Since we don't have breasts with which to greet the nice man, offer instead to greet him with hot lesbian make-outs with our current companion.
>>33276119ask fo a kiss
>>33276246>>33276252>I have to apologize for not properly greeting you!>Perhaps I can offer to kiss my companion here to make up for it?"Yorick-!!">I mean, I've been impolite this WHOLE time! You could of helped me, friend..
Rolled 1>Unless you want to help me make up for it, buddy~?"Well.. Hm."1- /k/ay complies2- She rejects3- /fit/izen does it instead
>>33276915I like the direction this is going.
"You owe me for this..">Shut up and pucker up!
Rolled 1>Whoopsie~! She must of fainted~!You are now in possession of /k/ay's body for this set of hours1, 1 hour2, 24 hours3, 75 hours
>>33277621Make out with lfitlzgerald. Steal his body. Since he'd be willing...
>>33277621AH! AFTER TEN THOUSAND YEARS I FINALLY HAVE A BODY!!! IT'S TIME TO CONQUER EARTH!!!
>>33277621Have sex with the /fitguy.
Rolled 2>>33277658>>33277800>>33277822Indecisive, rolling.
>>33277800>>33277930Conquer the earth on 1 hour is gonna be freaking hard....
>>33277930Conquer the earth SEXUALLY.
>>33277978Nah, we just gotta get a permanent body in one hour. THEN we can conquer earth.
>>33277800>AH! AFTER TEN THOUSAND YEARS I FINALLY HAVE A BODY!!!>IT'S TIME TO CONQUER EARTH!!!
"Lady, you okay?"People are staring.
>>33278179Sex him. Sex him hard.
>>33278179i roll to seduce the guards-i mean random guy
>>33278216"W-wait what aRMMMMMf"
You proceed your sexy assault on the sexy man.
>>33278410a-are we winning?
Depends, you tell me.Looks like he has no objectives to this at all, so you can either make this hour last or we can go ahead and move onto the next character.
>>33278739Let's see what Garush is up to.
>>33278739Make the hour last
>>33278739He has no objectives? You're not trying hard enough.Give him objectives. SEXY objectives.
>>33279169/k/ay is a chick.
>>33278855Seconding to see what our favourite orc is up to.
>>33275921Holy shit Teli is back! Get hype.>>33278739I know I'm too late, but make him wear a pompadour wig. Find a wig store if you must.
I need to proofread my posts, meant Objections.>>33279162>>33281556"H-hey, you're growing hair..">Yeah, so?"And.... Do we have to do this here and now?"5 more posts and we reach /tg/ mainstation.We arrive
>>33282295Choke him until climax
>>33282295Bully his penis.
>>33282295"Don't you want to?"Commence fuckingAnd maybe post the images on Imgur, if they're going to get as lewd as I hope.
>>33282295Toy with his ass.
>>33282295LET 'ER RIP
>>33282295Be surprised to find a gun shoved down your panties.
>>33282295Reach disastrous banshee screaming climax.
>>33282295Lewd him. Lewd him good and hard.
4>>33282474DON'T MIND IF I DO
3>>33283192"..Zzz.. Bitch..zz"And so our possessed /k/ay lewded our /fit/izen good and hard.Continue as:>Garush>/k/ay's Conscious>Neckbeard>Charm Dealer>Headless Body of Torpedo Asshole>A dog
>>33283283dog dog dog dog dog
>>33283283DOG DOG DOG
>>33283283What time is it?DOG O'CLOCK
You are now a dog.
lets make love
>>33283581Activate dog powers.
>>33283581Win at life, because you are dog.
>>33283581Keep doing what you're doing; you're already brilliant.
>>33283581Burrow into the snow and frolic.
>>33283612Make love to who?
>>33283794A fire hydrant.
the Goddess of loveor a cat
>>33283794The nearest human leg.
>>33283794Our quest begins here! Begin sniffing about, doglike.
>>33283892>>33284040Your quest for a human leg had began. There is two familiar scents, both going in an opposite direction.East or west?
>>33284270pray to the dog gods for guidance
>>33284270West is best.
>>33284270Go west, young dog
>>33284347>>33284384West? I thought we were supposed to be going Est.
>>33284330>>33284384You head west. The familiar scent is closer now, but what's even closer is this HUMAN leg!
>>33285077Hump dat leg.Hump it in TECHNICOLOR
>>33285077Enter cutscene mode for maximum humpery. Spend most of the quest budget on this vitally important transitional scene./tg/: Marvel at how beautifully it's all come together.
>>33285077Become the hero of dogs you are. Become, HORNDOG!
>>33285223Most importantly, make it a .gif
"What the FUCK"
>>33287581Bite. Bite harder than you ever havebefore.
>>33287581Just continue humping.
>>33287581Don't let go! As a dog, you must pursue your dreams! Don't let that human ruin it for you.
>>33287581Summon our Stand and Oraoraora fuck of him!!!!
>>33287581The hump must flow!
>>33287581Impregnate his leg with your seed!
>>33287573>doinkThat is the most fucking adorable humping sound, goddamnit.
>>33293765Yeah! It worked for Zeus, right?Of course, Zeus was a god, and he had another god fetus baby thing /implanted/ in his leg rather than fucked into it, and this all was not done by a dog, so it's a pretty different scenario really.BUT WE CAN TRY. WE CAN STRIVE TO GO BEYOND.
"C'mon you little shitstain let go-"
"THAT'S IT""IF YOU DON'T GET OFF ME RIGHT NOW, I'LL NEUTER YA"
>>33295493Hump on his other leg.
>>33295493FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS
>>33295493Hump his right leg
>>33295493get off of himthen finish on his face
>>33295493Make him your bitch
>>33295493Hump his other leg. Avoid neutering deftly.
>>33295493Neuter him instead.
>>33295524>>33295554>>33295562You went on to make love to his other leg, ensuring that will carry your pups too-
This bitch kicked you, you gonna take that?
>>33298640Rip off his balls!!!
>>33298640steal his scarf
Rolled 2>>33298830>>33298924Rolling for grapple success.>>33298914If miss, automatically go after the scarf
You have stolen your foe's scarf!
>>33299277Abscond with scarf, then fornicate with it.
It is your opponents turn.
>>33299314He got a second scarf under the first one?
Rolled 14Your opponent kicks you! Accumulating damage
Rolled 39>>33299361Summon our Stand and oraora him!
Ah fuck I forgot to change the sprite>>33299339It is now your turn
>>33299413Wear scarf, seduce leg while it blows sexily in the wind.
>>33299413Naw, you should make our enemy "The Man of Endless Scarves".Any ways, use Scarf Whip!
>>33299413Put on the scarf
Rolled 1>>33299442>>33299464>>33299484Decisive roll
>>33299442You don the stolen scarf and use it to help you seduce that sweet, sweet leg of his.
Looks like the leg is pretty aroused in your book!
And it looks like it's about to come over for some hot dog lovin-
Rolled 25POWAccumulating damage
>>33299973That motherfucker is asking for it.Get under his cloak and bite his dick.
Your opponent's turn has already passed, it's your turn now.
>>33300024Flee the dog-kicker. There is only pain to be found here.
>>33300024Obviously your beloved (the leg), is being manipulated by that evil man, you must free it from the vile grasp of his pelvis.
Rolled 2>>33300034Here is the list of specials>>33300070>>33300116Rolling
>>33300269>Summon AngelANGELIC HORDES, COME FORTH
>>33300269Summon our angel, Wings!
>>33300269Use Knot to tie him up!
>>33300300>>33300302>>33300548You have spent all your mana to summon an Angel companion
"WHAT THE SHIT IS THAT"Your opponent has went from ENRAGED to SHOCKED! He cannot move for two turns.
"Alright, what's the problem here?"It is still your turn.
>>33300713Wait, he can see our Angel? HE MUST BE AN ANGEL USER TOO!!Wimper, to tell Wings that the man is our enemy.
>>33300713"This man has withheld my TRUE LOVE from me, has both threatened and initiated VIOLENCE against my person. In the name of JUSTICE and the PURITY of my love, I have called for your assistance in returning my love to me and punishing this VILLAIN. O' vessel of RIGHTEOUSNESS, allow not this GREAT EVIL from claiming one more victory in his campaign of TORMENT."Though that all comes out more like, "Arrouou Arrouuuuuu"
>>33300713>hump angel's leg
>>33300738"Enemy? What did he do?">Arouuu.."But he smells human."
>>33300866Do a light kick to one of the angel's legs to show what the man did.
>>33300814You prepare to hump her leg, but she tells you better not do it else she scolds you hard.
>>33300965Run around the angel, wait no! Frolic around the angel.
>>33300866Begin to respond, but, then >>33300814Look those at those angel gams, they are simply... divine...
>>33300965Bask in holy presence of the Angel.Let go of you Arousal. Acquire Enlightement.
>>33300965Apologize. Then >>33300803
>>33300965>>33301005Rather than enlightenment, we must embody justice! We already have the scarf.
>>33300965Through your frolicking (>>33300988) use dog interpretive dance to express to the angel that the human kicked you.Then, due to divine proximity, become a canine agent of justice (>>33301176), out to defeat any who may have, say, made deals with demons.
Hey guys, can the angel be our Stand? And can we "call" him Wings ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wings_(band) )?
>>33301701>himThat's a chick.
>>33301754Oh, right sorry.
>>33301701Rather call her "Mr. Mister" so her special can be called Broken Wings.
>>33301841And when Garush ascends. his will be bokken wings.
>>33301542And so you frolicked around the angel, while glancing at her gams. Then you proceed to use dog interpretive dance to explain what the human did to you.
"Is that so?"
"Human, why did you kick this dog?"
"B... Because he... humping... leg..!"
"Dog, is this true?""Did you hump this man's leg?"
>>33302874Do the angels not give allowance for a dog in love?
>>33302874What sort of dog would we be if we didn't?
>>33302874"Aroo Aroo Woof."
>>33302906>>33302908>Aroo?"Only when said lover is 'consenting',">>33302938>Bark!"Understandable, but you can't just hump anyone's legs without their okay. It's rude, you know.""Now go apologize before I get the spray bottle out."
>>33303300Look really sorry.
>>33303300Go towards the man and lay prone.
>>33303312"Don't apologize to me!"
>>33303535Pee on him and walk away
tell her we love her
>>33303596Yelp and urinate is fear
>>33303596This isn't even a battle anymore... FIX IT BY ATTACKING YOUR OWN TAIL! The bastard is always behind you plotting something.
>>33303596Panic. Not the spray bottle!
>>33303596Apologize to the man.
>>33303596Attempt to drink the water.
>>33303596Collapse on the ground in defeat.
>>33308831I'll help to!
>>33303634You try telling her you love her. She sprayed you again."Bad! That isn't even your scarf is it? It smells like that human's!"
>>33318319>He was kicking me!>I thought if I wore it he'd start to treat me more like a mating partner a I'd look more human
>>33318319Run away from the evil spray bottle angel trying to steal our scarf!
>>33318319Return the scarf in exchange for her hoodie.We dog dress up games now.
>>33318319>It smells like that human's!Wait a minute... she is not a angel!!!!
>>33318319Point out that he kicked us before we took the scarf.
>>33318406>Bark bark!>Baark, arooo!"... Okay then.""I still don't think he wanted you to fornicate with you, not like that in the least."
>>33319047Be apologetic to the guy.
"Besides, I'm sure he'll forgive you if you just give the scarf back, we can move on with our day. Away from this mess.""Right, human?""I just want to go back inside now, it's fucking cold and I have no arms."
>>33319047Wait...the angel is wet, but it's not raining...
>>33319078Give the scarf back but suggest the angel that she could take his socks and use them as new arms for the armless guy.
>>33319092All this talk of fornicating probably caused that.
>>33319209Then lets exploit it!
I'm pretty sure that's just us who is wet. Because of the Spray Bottle of Fuck You.
>>33319078Give the scarf back then start rolling around.
>>33319342>Status menu>On the angel side (See health 500HP)>Status>WetShe wants the D
>>33319490She's trying to steal our leg!
>>33319092No, YOU'RE wet, dog!>>33319202You return the man's scarf, and the Angel translated your suggestion to him.".. Thanks, but I need those to keep my feet warm-"
>>33319402Then you started to roll around.
I'm pretty sure that just shows all statuses for all allies. Hence why it also shows "Aroused" before and after her arrival.
Unsummon angel and live to hump another day.
>>33319490That's us, you moron. We had the AROUSED status until she hit us with the squirt bottle.
>>33319726"Anything else before I go back to my shows?"
>>33320122Can you teach us psychic powers so we don't run into these misunderstandings again?
>>33320122I wanna speak every language!
>>33320122Pop the hood open, yo
>>33320222Are you fucking stupid? You die if you look under the hood!Wait, that's angels, right? Or is that weavers?
>>33320122Give us the hoodie cause we're cold and wanna look cute.
>>33320122Is this angel referencing something, if so, what?
>>33320122>>33320215I want to become a Babel-dog!
>>33320412Yeah, we interrupted her in the middle of some quality TV time.
>>33320122I want to see what is under that hood.And lick it. Woof.
>>33320122Well, we could find a DIO lookalike and beat him up.
Rolled 2>>33320192"I'm afraid you're gonna have to earn that right.">>33320222"Hmm.."
"Sorry, buddy, maybe another time. Later!"
>>33320883Inquire how to earn that right.
>>33321195Lets try to find a proper offering for an angel.Bible says that God loves live sacrifices.
Now what, dog?
>>33321230>pause>enter cheat code
>>33321230Look for vending machine, we need a drink. And >>33321264 use a cheatcode for money.
>>33321230WE HAVE TO EARN THE RIGHT TO HOLY POWERS!BETTER START GRINDING EVIL MOBS!
>>33321316Or,We can continue to find love in this cold and windy city.Or we could shit in someones shoes, as is a dogs birth rite.
>>33321343Or maybe we can chase a cat.Whatever makes the most sense.
>>33321230I guess we could sniff after that one-armed thespian. He may have snacks.
>>33321175I want floaty eyes, headless angel's legs.
>>33321230>>33321316We go find evil and kamen rider the shit out of it, we need a scarf though.
>>33321453Oh geeze is the dog the opposite of Neckbeard? Why WOULDN'T Neckbeard's nemesis be a mute dog?
>>33321453But what is evil to a dog?Spray bottles?electric fences?late dinners?Early Vet Visits?
>>33321510Legs that remain unhumped.
>>33321510Legs, dog kickers, cats, the vet
>>33321264>>33321280GAME PAUSEDENTER CHEAT
>>33321510There ARE dog eating ducks in the park...
>>33321596>CHEESE STEAK JIMMY'S
>>33321596^ ^ v v < > < > b a start
>>33321596Up up down down left right left right B A
>>33321721dat not noice
>>33321596J, J, B, A
>>33321596>giveweapons>player.additem FFFFFFF 100000000
>>33321648>^ ^ v v < > < > b a
>>33322351Rape the Television-person
>>33322351oh shit how many of these are you doing
>>33322351Seduce with a soulful rendition of Old Man River.
>>33322382Seduce it hard, alpha eyes and everything.
>>33322390Hump Teli's leg
>>33322435This anon has it.
>>33322390Poke floating sword
>>33322450But is it consensual?We don't want the spray bottle again. Hey teli, you okay with a god dog humping your leg right?
>>33322390Get dressed in a bizarre variant of male japanese school clothes.
>>33322410I like this idea
>>33322390This >>33322410, and the offer the D.
Wait, did Teli just made his avatar a female TV person?What
>>33322688That's just his trip anon.
>>33322688Teli's trip spawns a telivision.
>>33322688Teli's drawn her(?)self like that for a while it seems.http://telivesion.tumblr.com/post/27079018540/huehuehuehue
I thought it was obvious that I wasn't a dude. I wish I was one though.>>33322410>Aroooo roooo rooo rooo roOOOo~>Bark bark arooo-
>>33323532I wish you were too.
Teli has revoked your cheat rights.
>>33323556Show the cute television who's boss with your penis
>>33323556YeahYeah that's legit.Grab a sword, go hunt evil.
>>33323532Well with finding out that I found that you do more arts. I was gonna sleep, but shittery fuckery doo you are one of my favorite artists.
>>33323556Enter the discotheque in your stylin new bod.
>>33323601This, we have hundreds to choose from. Lets do like that guy from naruto, that card from yugioh or the one guy from one piece and wield a bunch of them at once
>>33323556Too damned meta. Teli, transform the dog into a sentai.
>>33323794Or just find the biggest one and act like that from that final fantasy game or that other guy from naruto or that guy from beserk.
>>33323927Turn him into a squadron? How about a masked rider?
>>33323936Never mind that those swords are too heavy to effectively use for anything other than missiles.
>>33323957No, he must be legion, he must be many but one!He must ascend!
>>33323998Kamen Rider Squadron?
>>33324104What part of hivemind of justice didn't you get?
>>33323453TeliTeli you are a GODDAM GENIUS
Teli, do you think you're going to do more in this thread before it falls off, or should we archive now?
>>33324969Sorry, I was away. Is it autosaging?
>>33325632Yes. /tg/ has the low bump limit.I won't complain about it though. Keeps cycling out old threads at a good rate for the speed of this board, IMO.
>>33325806Yeah, someone should probably archive, then.
>>33326110>>33325806Go ahead and archive, I'll prepare posts for the next thread.
>>33326272Somebody beat me to ithttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=eckbeard+quest