Your morning routine starts as you wake up a little before five in the morning. You pull yourself out of bed, haul yourself into the bathroom to empty your bladder and brush your teeth, then back into your smallish bedroom to check the internet. You like to keep up with news from home- politics, local news... and sports.You are Commander Russells of the M26E1 Pershing Heavy tank "Black Jack" and, as you stare at CNN's sports page, you're greeted with Black Jack's turret and your crew's faces. Your first though, as uncaffienated as you are, is that you can't remember the last time you'd managed to find a story about tanking on CNN.com.Then you go downstairs, make some coffee and start breakfast. As the caffiene slowly hits your system. Things become clearer and you almost drop your plate of scrambled eggs.>Double check- you were probably still asleep.>"ANZUUUUU!">Confirm with crew.>Other.
>>31693370>>Confirm with crew.We asked for this.
>>31693370>>Confirm with crew.Is this "real" life?
>>31693370>Confirm with crewwe did ask for coverage. We might want to head off the Miho. we're going to get enough grief from Erik and Maho, lets not get the girl we're fighting for mad at us.Also, TIME FOR TANKS... Hopefully.
>>31693370>Confirm with crew.
>>31693370>Confirm with crew.Wait, CNN has a news story that isn't about a plane or a ferry? Holy shit!
>>31693882You think that's big, lets check out what Fox is saying. I'd like to see how they handle this 'unconventional' story. Big Props to Little A.
>>31693734seconded, lets include Miho in the definition of crew.>>31694083this sounds good too, shall we check other news networks?
>>31693370>Confirm with crew.Dammit what
>>31694083>willingly watching FoxUgh.
>>31694389In character, why not? We've never established political leanings. Out of character, I do it the same reason Colbert's audience does: Teh Lulz humor factor.
>>31694474I can't watch any cable news these days, I end up yelling at the tv.
>>31694850You're looking to get info out of them, I just laugh and play 'pick the cliche'.
Your first call is to Roy. Before you even have a chance to greet him he lets you know. "Check Reddit. Front page." You carry the phone to your computer- you never were much into Reddit- and there it is. You click on the link and are surprised to find it brings you to ESPN.com.You sit there and blink at the screen- they've got a different picture- this one an official photo taken during the 'bout with Saunders- the T54 maingun pointed slightly to the side as it crosses a shallow stream on the way to the starting point. "Calif. Tank Crew Makes Waves in Japanese Team Tanking."You absentmindedly hang up on Roy as you dial for Patrick- it rings a few times showing that he's still asleep. He finally picks up. "Wha?-""We're on the internet." You say quickly as things become clearer and clearer. "I-I think we're famous."Patrick's reply takes a while for him to put together. "Okay.">Get dressed. Go to practice. Find Anzu.>Contact Miho.>Panic.>Other.
>>31695357>Contact Miho.>Panic"Miho girl, please don't be mad. You remember how we tried to get some press for the match? Well..."
>>31695521totally. we NEED to spaghetti!>>31695537we do that after Miho.
>>31695357DON'T PANIC.FREAK OUT INSTEAD.
Man I seriously need to write SaS
>>31695609In other news water is wet. (but seriously, go when you have a quality story, or at least an outline of one.)
>>31695654Haha, an outline huh...?alright, so I have to think about where SaS is actually going. Thank you for reminding me.
>>31695750I'd say get several ideas for character and story arcs, just so you have flexibility for anon's choices.
>>31695521what you said.
>>31695918Is not of quest, ks of simple writefaggings
>>31695977just a regular outline then.
>>31695977Thanks for that image, I showed it to a gaming friend to sum up what the campaigns been for me.
You spend the next fifteen minutes finding articles about your crew, Oorai and the upcoming showmatch against Kuromuromine's King Tiger- from ESPN to History.com, it seems everyone has a piece of the story. What amazes you is that its only been a couple of days since Anzu got the okay.And then, halfway on your walk to school you realise- you're not entirely sure you can knock their tank out- if you fail it won't just be in front of Miho and her family, it will be in front of the entire world- suddenly you're representing thousands of American tankers. You aren't ready for this.You quicken your pace, vision narrowing as you try to take deep, calming breaths. They turn into gulps as your steps quicken. You need to get to school, you need to figure something out. You burst into the hanger and, with quickness and effiency brought by your experience as a tank commander, scan the room for Anzu.You spot her with Miho, discussing something. You don't know what.You don't care.>"Anzu, why am I on the internet?">"Miho, I have no idea what I'm doing and now everyone is going to watch.">Other.
>>31696717WHEN BESET BY DOUBTRUN IN LITTLE CIRCLESWAVE YOUR ARMS AND SHOUT.
>>31696717>>Other."GIRLS I AM SCARED AND CONFUSED COMFORT ME"
>>31696717>Spaghetti. Spaghetti all over.
>>31696792Add "I had a plan, but now SO MUCH PRESSURE" and I second.See, we had a plan: track from long range, they repair, we track again, cycle of trolling. Now the plan is being watched by THE ENTIRE WORLD!
Rolled 15Rollan to resist spaghetti
>>31696766It's :When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout!
>>31696854>SO MUCH PRESSUREhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3itm_R-qEEY
>>31697301isn't >>31696766comes from Ciaphas cain book?
You walk up to them, taking a deep, calming breath. Anzu nods to acknowledge you while Miho smiles. "I looked on the internet this morning and we were there and everyone knows and OH GOD EVERYONE IS GOING TO SEE US-" You stop yourself, take another calming breath. "Anzu, why are we on the front page of reddit and how did you manage to get everyone to make stories and OH GOD WHAT IF WE FAIL I'M CAN'T TAKE THIS-"Miho looks confused. Anzu just stares at your dispassionately. "You said you wanted media attention." She shrugs before reaching into her jacket to retrieve a bag of sweet potatoes. "I knew some people who knew some people- Holly already had her story done. She was able to do a quick writeup about the historical significance of the Pershing and Tiger II finally going head to head.">"MIHO HELP ME.">"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional.">Other.
>>31697654>"MIHO HELP ME."
>>31697654>"MIHO HELP ME. I'M SO SORRY THIS ESCALATED, IJUSTWANTEDTOHELPYOUWITHYOURSISTERBUTTHENOGMWTFBBQSPAGETTIARGLEFLARGLEBRAARGLE! "
>>31697654>>"MIHO HELP ME."When in doubt, ask the the missus.
Well, at least one of Russells' internal voices is still confidant about this. We've got it in the bag.>>31697654> Find your confidence again
>>31697654>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."
>>31697654>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."Weren't we just banking on getting some more local sponsorship/investment out of this.
>>31697724ther emight be a rational voice in all this, but its drowned out by everyone else going 'WTF!' so, I second this: >>31697702
>>31697654>>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."
>>31697654>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."THIS HAS ESCALATED
>>31697654>>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."THis has gotten very silly.
>>31697654>>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."Also I think you accidentally a verb
>>31698127no, pretty sure intentional.>>31697702This
>>31697702This except the wtfbbq thing.This has escalated beyond expectations.
>>31697654>>>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."I'm not even mad. I'm impressed.
>>31697654>"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."For a young American male, Russels does not comprehend the immensity of the shit the internet can get him in.
>>31697654"How did you even international? I thought it might be local or maybe regional."
>>31697654>>"How did you even international? I thought it might be intergalactic or maybe planetary."
>>31695750Okay, so I have decided. Since I'm stuck on inbetween combat slice of life shit, I'll just skip those bits and go straight for the battles!Makes up for BJ never writing any!
>>31698685Well now I have to change trips because my fucking computer exploded as I posted this.
>>31698685just make sure you've at least introduced us to who ever you're following. some of us may need re-introductions.>>31698721my sympathies, but for some reason that cracks me up.
>>31698776I typo'd the tripcode since the computer didn't have it saved, and then when I clicked post the computer turned into static and crashed, which means I can't delete the post. A sequence of unfortunate events, it was.and lemme dig up the pastebin for the bits I've already written.
>people worldwide know me and the tank>CNN reports on it>Fox probably going apeshit about a guy shooting at high school girls in a tank, what is the world coming to>SPORTS BETTING>MERCHANDISEAre we going to get a phone call in the middle of the night from a rep from General Dynamics about a sponsorship deal?
>>31698874I'd actually say Fox would be more, "American Superiority proves itself again, WWII is teh greatest". things like that, since militarism, and american militarism, is right up their ally. complaining about high school kids shooting each other sounds like far-left Dems.
>>31697654>>Other."Are you at least monetizing the everloving shit out of this, Anzu?"
>>31698874forget GD, Ford (or whatever company made BlackJack), will be begging for an endorsement.
>>31698936Well, no, what you'd get next is MSNBC crying about what the mean Fox said.
>>31698976As long as we don't end in Nascar/F1 style endorsement...Something like; your company logo placed on roof will cost US$ One million, on turret US$ 500.000 or such.
>>31698976Correction on my part: Pershing's were made by Detroit Arsenal Plant, which was under Chrysler, which was sold to GD,but the currently operating sections are owned and operated by the Army. Who do you want to fund Ooarai, Anons: Chrysler, GD, orthe US Army
>>31699054>Chrysler>Owned by Fiat>the Italian team is connected to Fiat>smug Anchovie.jpg
>>31699046Nah, we'd pick one and just appear in a few commercials, wear logos on uniforms, minor things like that.>>31699044True, MSNBC is the type to decry whatever the right says, but what >>31698874 says fits them far better than Fox. explain to me how Republicans would hate a sport that involves big guns, bigger patriotism, and the biggest symbol of 'America, world's defender of Democracy', since Ronald Reagan. with all due respect anon, do you even /pol/?
>>31699046Given how we flipped out about ahistorical paint on our Tank, I'd say that sponsor plasters are out of the question.
>>31697724This. Find your goddamn stones, man.
>>31699232I kinda want to see Anzu trying to negotiate this with Russel tho.Its will be entertaining.
>>31699097so you want everyone... Hey, >>31699046, this guy: >>31699097 would like a word with you.>>31699111that's actually funny enough to work.>>31699245sorry, we've avoided spaghetti multiple times before, the response leading in the polls is the non-spaghetti option, and we have Miho with us. you're getting what you want.>>31699298I think we'd compromise to logos on the uniforms, but anyone touches the tank, and we withdraw support.
haha let's go troll LGA
>>31699412They haven't put sponsor plaster. yet.Still thinking again, i just realize how easy Trude got sponsor.
>>31699221Most people who decry Fox have never actually watched Fox News.They just parrot what their teachers, professors, or liberal friends have said.Now, I'm not saying Fox is great. But they're far from the worst.They're a hell of a lot more balanced than the New York Times and MSNBC.They're only slightly behind CNN in balance, and that's because Fox has more OpEd shows than CNN does.And that's only taking in the television side of things.Go to the websites, and Fox and CNN are pretty damn even.MSNBC is still a leftist cesspool of outright lies and slander.I generally go to the BBC first...then CNN....then Fox.Fox will give a more factual story on certain elements, while CNN will do so for others (firearms are a big example for this).BBC you go to for all international news.All that being said...1) Fox would be all over this shit, promoting it up one wall and down the other. Tankery, especially 'MURRICA taking Japan to task in TANKS, just fits not only the Right, but Fox's demographic as well.2) MSNBC would be calling Russels and his crew baby-killing psychopath racists3) The real news comes from BBC (just like in real life)
>>31699412I don't know how to respond to this
You start babbling again, vomiting words outwards as your world seems to come apart. You aren't even really listening to yourself at this point. You look at Miho, finally managing to shut your mouth for two seconds before managing to control yourself. "Miho, Nishizumi's are famous. What do I do and OH GOD."She puts a reassuring arm over your shoulder, pulling you down into a sort of huddle. "It's okay. Russells! It's okay." She coos- at least you've managed to not break down in tears and have kept yourself quiet enough not to attract attention from the crew that are there that early. "All that attention doesn't mean anything. It really doesn't- it's a million miles away." "But what if..." You stammer."When you get the word and that battle starts- all the media in the world isn't going to change the fact that it's just you and Erika and your crews and your tanks out there." She bites her lip. "It's you and a target- that's all. You've even got a plan!""You'll do great, Russells!" Anzu says, slapping you on the back as she decides to rejoin the conversation. "Not like I've made any bets on the outcome that would ruin us financially if we lost."You and Miho both stare at her.>Ignore her- she's being Anzu.>"You made a bet, didn't you?">Other.
>>31699475I find it weird how you murricans can have climate change deniers on the channel, giving them equal air time with actual scientist.
>>31699475I've seen fox. More specifically, I've seen Glen Beck back before he was fired.He was exactly as bad as I expected.
>>31699537>>"You made a bet, didn't you?"Why i don't even surprised.Why i kinda expecting this.
>>31699537>Hug the Miho is sheer terror.
>>31699475Also, Tears Morgan would be frothing at the mouth at the idea of privately-owned tanks being used by teenagers.We should get an interview with him, just so he can accuse Russels of being a psychopath just waiting to blow up a school full of innocent children (THINK OF THE CHILLUNS!) with his illegal full-automatic sniper heat-seeking tank gun!
>>31699537>"ANZUUUUUUUUUUU!">comical fade out
>>31699537>"You made a bet, didn't you?how much did you bet Anzu and with who?
>>31699537>"You made a bet, didn't you? Of course you did..."
>>31699598Not a Muurican.Who is this guy, and why i imagine he doing antics like that some anti-vidya lawyer (thompson something) but on tankery?
>>31699567So, by your logic, I can assume CNN is absolute shit because I saw Piers Morgan before he was fired.
>>31698721I did that as well a while ago.
>>31699537>>Other."...What did you do."
>>31699537>"You made a bet, didn't you?
>>31699621This.>>316994751. your arguments have convinced me to give fox anther chance. 2. good to see we agree on the media's sequence of responses: CNN: Look at this! FOX: FUCK YEAH! MSNBC: YOU MONSTERS! BBC: ok, here's how it all went down...
>>31699637Piers (Tears) Morgan is a Brit who got kicked out of Britain and went to CNN, insulted Americans because of gun ownership (among other things), refused to listen to any other point of view other than his own exceptionally misinformed view, was a general liberal douchebag, and just got fired.
>>31699681For Fox....treat it like CNN.Watch their News segments, avoid their talk-shows/opinion pieces.Use them to fact-check CNN.Use BBC to fact-check both.
>>31699688Don't forget that he got decked by Jezza too.
>>31699705ok, now I just need to find the actual News segments when they are begin aired... or just stick with the web site. And Yes, fact checking everything through BBC
>>31699713Which was almost as epic as when Buzz Aldrin decked the guy who was claiming the Moon Landing was fake
Just leaving this here. She's one of the auto club girls, I think.
>>31699537>>"You made a bet, didn't you?"
>>31699770/k/ripple pls, we're on a blue board
>>31699806It's SFW! Ish! :P
Ok people, the politics issue has been resolved. Let's move on to another topic, like... posting GuP pics. that's always fun!>>31699621seconded.
>>31699770Everyone knows that best girl is actually three-some between Yuzu, Yukari, and Saori.With Anzu acting as Domme
>>31699841A-anon pls, this is too much
hey blackjack how awesome was the jingles video about the gup model he got.
>>31700020old news, but I'd guess that for a Jingles fan like BJ, its an ego boost and encouragement for him to continue this.
oh since wot exists in the universe does jingles also exist.
>>31700079Why is this upside down?
>>31699841We need a drawfag for this.For.....research purposes.
>>31700115Not saying it.
>>31700088Hmm... Given Blackjack worships that British gnome, what do you think? (the answer is YES!)
>>31699841Anzu and Yukari are the Dommes, all in leather.Yuzu is handcuffed to the edge of the bed, Anzu riding her face while Saori has her head in her crotch....and Yukari with a strapon behind Saori......so......lewd
You and Miho stare at Anzu, who hums as she looks back at you. All that doubt and fear is replaced by anger. "You made a bet, didn't you?" She smiles at the two of you. "Well, I should get my team to work." She turns around neatly and marches off towards the Pz.38(t). "I think you're going to do great, Russells!"Miho is the picture of calm serenity, with a small amount of confusion. You, on the other hand, can feel the bones in your hand creaking dangerously as you ball them into fists. "OF COURSE!" You blurt out. "Of course she'd bet the farm on this fight."Miho remains call. "She knows you're going to win. That's why- she's betting on a sure thing.">"Why is everyone so goddamn confident?!">You need some alone time.>Find crew. They need to be briefed.>Other.
>>31700554>>"Why is everyone so goddamn confident?!"Because you're a winner Russells
>>31700554>"Why is everyone so goddamn confident?!"
>>31700554>Find crew. They need to be briefed."ok, update crew. but first things first, *kiss Miho* thanks for being my voice of reason, boss-lady. "
>>31700554>>Other.Deep breath. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."
>>31700672and then kiss her.
>>31700554>Find crew. They need to be briefed.>*kiss Miho* "Thanks for being my voice of reason, baby" DEEP BREATHS BRO
>>31700767so >>31700619+>>31700672?I change my vote to this.
>>31700554>>"Why is everyone so goddamn confident?!"and followed by>>31700619
>>31700767>>31700672nnnnnng! SO MANY GOOD IDEAS! ah, screw it. this: >>31700810+>>31700767. This is my final vote and answer.
>>31700554Yo-ho-ho and a pallet of 90mm HVAP, I'm here!>>31700697Thirded. Or fourthed. I only get one damn post in these threads, you west coast knuckleheads better pay attention!
>>31700810Seconded.>>317008681. Good to see you, but why aren't you staying?2. That awesome story is now a comic. my night is Perfect!
>>31700895Because I'm a hippie liberal east coast New Yorker noodlenoggin, and it's 2:30 AM.
>>31700994*puts on Oddball accent* Man, I'm in Ohio, man. you're not the only one whose losing sleep here.
>>31700994also, obligatorily sleep and weakness pic.
>>317011214chan, its too early for this, just cooperate.
>>31700619> Deep breath. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."> "Ok, update crew. but first things first, *kiss Miho* thanks for being my voice of reason."Have some tanks while you're at it.
>>31700810what he said.
"Why is everyone so goddamn confident?" You say, looking downwards. "I don't get it- when did we all draw straws and decide me and mine have to be the big damn heroes?" It's something that's always been in the back of your mind- ever since that first fight against Darjeeling and Glorianna Highschool, you and Black Jack had been the centerpiece of the team- the crux and fulcrom, the hammer and the anvil. And against a lot of teams and a lot of tankers, Black Jack's overpowering strength was enough to get you through.Now though- the Tiger II was easily a match for the Pershing, perhaps even more than a match. And it's crew weren't amateur tankers- they were experts that were easily a match for you and your crew. This was going to be the first time where you were really stuck in- and the stakes of this fight kept rising faster and faster. You sigh, rubbing your eyes with your hands."It's because if anyone can, it's you." Miho says, giving you a hug. "We're confident because we've got every reason to be. Because you've earned our confidence- and you should have earned your own too." She shrugs. "Besides, you've got more advantages than you think-">"What sort of advantages?">"Thanks.">Other.
>>31701741> "Thanks."> Lean into the hug.
>>31701741>"Thanks.">return hug with kiss.
>>31701775seconding this.maybe just kiss in forehead though.
>>31701775>>31701790what they said. Pic related
>>31701775>>31701814The last thing we need is Anzu snapping a picture of that and posting that all over internet too.
>>31701942so what if she does? Like Miho said, all that attention's a million miles away. Right now, its just Miho and us, together.
>>31701741>"Thanks.">return hug with kiss.ITS HABBENING BJ
>>31701775>>31701790Relationship Level Up!
After we do the hugging and kissing, should we mention the whole 'token from a lady to a knight' idea from a few threads back?
Time to summoning ritual?
>>31702420EUAGH EUAGH BLACKJACK FATHAG!
>>31702446OH GOD! WHAT DID YOU DO?! MY HAIR IS TENTACLES! AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
>>31702536You should be thanking the Great Outer God, Blackjack has chosen you. now, spread your gift to your girlfriend. She will love you for it.
>>31702577DUDE! I'M A FUCKING BALL OF TENTACLES! SHE WOULDN'T RECOGNIZE ME!
>>31702598who said she need to recognize you?
>>31702598use the ministrations your new lord and master has given you to sooth and please her. then, she won't be able to get enough of you.
>>31702619>>31702620Good point. Rape ho!
You glance over at Black Jack- the big Pershing stood big and tall against the other tanks in the hanger. And maybe you did have some advantages here- You and your crew are experienced in one-on-one fights, while Erika, presumably has worked with the backup of a team for all of her career. "Well, I guess we're in too deep to crawl out now." You say, giving Miho a bit of a grin. "Either way, those reporters are going to get a hell of a fight.""Not confident enough, Russels." She says, giving you a stern look. "I want you imagining Erika's face when you put a round into her tank all day today. That's an order from the Team Captain!""Yes, Ma'am. I'll get my team on it, too." You salute crisply before turning away. "Thanks, Miho!" The media attention is going to make this interesting, not more difficult. And one way or another, it's going to be a hell of a fight.
>>317027011. What, no kiss?2. NEXT TIME: FINALLY WE FIGHT!
NEXT TIME ON GIRLS UND PANZER QUEST!>Anzu makes plans.>Party Preparations.>Ufufufufufufu.Girls und Panzer will return next Thursday at 4-5PM PST. (Sorry about the 1/week schedule- work is making it annoying with its scheduling.)Follow me on Twitter for schedule updates and to find out when the thread goes live!twitter.com/BlackJackGuPQ
Finished off Chapter XXIIhttp://pastebin.com/i9NjDFSZ
>>31704250Your last two chapters need work.
>>31699475Yeah, no. Fox makes shit up as much as anything else.http://gawker.com/5814309/jon-stewart-reads-off-laundry-list-of-false-statements-by-lying-dynasty-fox-news
>>31704763You really believe Jon Stewart? Seriously? He's a joker, not a reporter.
>>31705366>JokerThe correct word is 'Jester'. He self-identifies as one-the man whose stupid appearance and foppish attitude lets him say things-truthful things-that others can't.Quoth shakespeare: "It is a fool's perogative to utter truths that no one else will speak."
>>31705366Fact check stuff he says, most of it is true.The stuff that isn't is usually a penis joke.For example, secret nude photos of the supreme court are not a thing.Thank fucking god.
>>31705477> secret nude photos of the supreme court are not a thing.I wish you were right. But no. They get a full-page spread in America (the book).The photos are doctored, of course...but they're also anatomically accurate. Nine very old men and women.I still haven't been able to bleach that one out.
>>31704763Yeah, no.I can rival that list with just misinformation about firearms spouted off by CNN hosts.Hell, once again, Piers Morgan.CNN and Fox are roughly on par.And I went to high school and was friends with quite a few people who currently work behind the scenes at CNN.BBC is the best news source.CNN and Fox are roughly on par, with CNN slightly ahead due to less talk shows (which are naturally opinionated).MSNBC, and actually NBC news as well, are by FAR the worst.And guess what, both of them are either outright Leftist or left-leaning.But hey, Fox is conservative, so it's obviously the ZOMGWORSTNEWSEVERTHEYONLYLIELOLJOHNSTEWARTSAIDSO!Right?>>31705427He also speaks on things he knows jack-shit about, and puts a fairly hefty left-leaning bent on his "news".So take him about as seriously as Glenn Beck.
>>31706921Jon Stewart doesn't blatantly shill for companies selling numismatic gold coins that happen to be advertising during his runtime, or making blatantly false FUD statements, or crying on camera when pushing for destructive policy changes. CNN is like your lazy uncle who's never heard of snopes but has to keep talking all the time. Fox has an agenda.