You are Shax Bonemurdered, and this is the worst country you've ever been in. You heave a sigh as your sword crunches into the skull of another skeletal minion. They've been harassing you nonstop for the past few days. They're super weak, but man do they not ever stop coming. You can't count the amount of ones you've ground to dust. And that isn't because you're not good at counting! Allonces lost track, too!>CURRENT ADVENTURE PARTY: http://pastebin.com/tZ3saVGK>ABILITY TREE: http://pastebin.com/aBfqv1vP>CHARACTER Point: 1>I'm the boss! Points: 0>2/48 BtB exp>34/40 MSiF exp>12/40 CyRCTHaM exp>15/16 FMMM exp, 2/2 Tidal Points>Something bars your progress..."Yeah, real sorry about all this," Reklatul says. He's the lizard guy you picked up. Apparently the 'illegal' activity was taking one of the lead Sauromancer's consorts as a lover during a particularly blearly mating season. He wooed her with poetry and gifts, who cares. You don't know what lizard romance is like. Looking at your map, you see that your current plan is going to need to change. You were going to head straight to the first altar on the way to the jungles of utalaga. There was one more altar in Utalaga, and you'd just hit the last one on the way back. But, you're going to just get bogged down in the stupid swamp and the skeletons will overwhelm you. You're going to need to cut a different route.Where do you wanna go, boss?>Cut south. Hit the altar you were going to grab on the way back. It'll take longer, and you'll have to go through a few mountain passes. Trolls, Onis, and whatever passes for a goblin lives out there.>Keep on going! It was your plan. You're going to stick to it. It'll be rough, but you can guilt Reklatul the entire time. Also Allonces will freak out from swamps and leeches.>Cut through the mid, ignore the altars, and get to Utalaga as fast as possible. You've got a ritual to stop! Who cares about 'untold power' and 'fonts of pure elemental energy' or whatever.
>>31602182Where are the archives?
>>31602182>>Cut south. Hit the altar you were going to grab on the way back. It'll take longer, and you'll have to go through a few mountain passes. Trolls, Onis, and whatever passes for a goblin lives out there.Yeah!
>>31602182Easter afternoon is the perfect time Chief.>>31602207in the archives.
>>31602182>Keep on going! It was your plan. You're going to stick to it. It'll be rough, but you can guilt Reklatul the entire time. Also Allonces will freak out from swamps and leeches.
>>31602207I've never actually thought to link those before. I thought they were public knowledge. Though, between you and me, you might want to use foolz. I mistagged the first thread, and the fourth one was misarchived by a tricky anon.Regardless, here they are from the old suptg:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Oversized%20Weapon%20Quest
Find the nearest Ogre. Suck its dick.Oh wait with isnt the ERP thread my bad
>>31602182>>Keep on going! It was your plan. You're going to stick to it. It'll be rough, but you can guilt Reklatul the entire time. Also Allonces will freak out from swamps and leeches.If it is boss' plan then it is the right plan. We will have to deal with these altar's eventually cause when do we ever give up on a side quest, so this will gain us time in the long run.
>>31602182>Keep on going! It was your plan. You're going to stick to it. It'll be rough, but you can guilt Reklatul the entire time. Also Allonces will freak out from swamps and leeches.>implying /tg/ has a life
>>31602244Honest mistake anon. We all like ourselves a loli goblin sucking an ogre dick every now and then. Though Shax would probably think it a snake and cut it off.
>>31602263She is not as innocent as you think she is, but she is pretty dense.
>>31602279>>31602263So basically if an orc whipped his dick out she would know its his dick, but if he said it was a snake, she could get convinced it is one.(don't goblins eat snakes?)
>>31602291Goblins eat anything. If you give them a dick as food they would eat it, you don't have to fool them.
You guys were pretty happy with the plan the boss came up with, I see.Well, writing then!And Easter must be the lewdest holiday, or something?
>>31602311True, we did mention eating animal balls before.
>>31602312Lewd? We are discussing food you pervert.
>>31602311The mental image of the boys squirming in both pain and embarrassment at seeing the boss and allonce eating cooked up junk is funny.(the slutty elf would be clueless)
>>31602321Goat jewels are quite tasty actually. Try them if you get the chance. I am serious.
>>31602291>not convincing her to suck the cream out of it
Allonces, exhausted, leans on her spear as she addresses you. "Jeez, it is awfully hard to stab a skeleton to death, you know? How much longer do we have to do this, Shax? It is hot and I'm sweating in this armor and there are flies everywhere."You take one more look at your map before rolling it up again. Of course she had to whine about this course before you could change it. There is no way you can change the plan now! It'd look like you were a sissy, and also that you were listening to Allonces. Both things you'd never respect someone for doing. "Put up with it, Allonces. It's only going to get worse. We gotta trudge through a mucky swamp to get to the altar."Reklatul raises a claw, "Ah, if I may interrupt, are you seriously going to destroy the Altars of Light?""Of course. Wrecking up things is my job," You crunch another skeleton skull with your boots to emphasize your point. "Besides, the Sea Mom is nice to me, and her friend says that ushering in darkness or whatever would be rad. Where's the downside? I think this place could be a little less sunny, myself." You did grow up in a cave. Darkness sounds nice and cozy!Waving his hands as if to ward you off, Reklatul says, "No no. You know that those Altars have a guardian, right? And if you defeat them, you can harness the power for yourself?"You sigh, and pat Reklatul on his cute lizard shoulders. "Look, you're new to the raiding business. When you raid you smash things up. If you take something, it is a split moment decision. I'll figure it out when I get there." Fetidclaw nods along, and Brokagh adds his affirmation. That's just how it works.A few more days pass. A dozen more skeletons. Eventually, the smell of rot sets in and the humidity picks up. Fetid says there is a small village not far away to the east. Bearbreath says that there is a some sort of strange tribe of creatures north.>Check out the village for a guide.>Scope out the tribe for the same.>Screw it, we're plowing through.
hey there chief.
>>31602517I love you never leave me
>>31602513>>Scope out the tribe for the same.Let's get some help!
>>31602513>>Check out the village for a guide.>>Scope out the tribe for the same.
>>31602513>Scope out the tribe for the same.Time to join up with some weird ass pigmys.
>>31602513>Check out the village for a guide.
>>31602513>Scope out the tribe.
>>31602513>Plow through the heavens with your oversized sword
>>31602513>all these skeletonsJesus, this is so not worth it.>Screw it, we're plowing through.
>>31602513>Scope out the tribe for the same.>>31602570i needed that laugh.
>>31602513>Screw it, we're plowing through.>>31602517>SupershaxThe hero we need. The hero we want. The hero we deserve.
>>31602513>cope out the tribe for the same.Doesn't this guaranteed another party member and an easier rolled for traveling through this place?
Hey.Hey Chief.Beach episode when?
>>31602656This. We need a beach episode. With Dragon Lady too.
Writing time is now.>>31602656I don't know. I could probably commission decu or someone to draw everyone in swimsuits. We'll cross that bridge when we get there!
>>31602529So long as long as you don't turn this thing into a 200 thread grindfest. 'Cause you could keep people engaged. And then we'd have yet another series of endless general threads on our hands.
>>31602764I actually have an end in mind. You're about two fifths of the way there. I've got way more quests than this I'd like to run after all!
>>31602816Just tell me that those plans include us either ascending, or becoming a god of some sort. The idea of a fairly clueless goblin girl as a big wig immortal dealing with her serious gods and shit just tickles my fancy.
>>31602816Awww man I'm gonna miss Shax and her ragtag group so much.
>>31602917>Deus ex goblinapls no.
>>31602917Most of the immortal shit we run into is even less serious than we are. There is a god of illiteracy for fuck sake.
>>31602917fuck that bullshit.
>>31602513So wait, why isn't Allonces a magician yet?
>>31603145we keep dragging her away from being taught.
>>31603145Whats a hex going to do to a skeleton?
You don't know if you trust any village with the rampant skeletoning going on. It could be overrun by horrible undead monsters! You'd rather just go to the tribe Bearbreath found. What a reliable guy! You wonder if Fetidclaw ever feels overshadow by his awesome Gnoll companion who is cooler than him. Not that you'd say it to his face. But everyone is thinking it.The group follows his lynx until you reach the outskirts of the tribe. "Here's where they are at, Boss," Bearbreath says. He's never been much for chatting. So aloof and cool.You peak over the edge. There are several small huts. There seems to be horrifying mishmashed monsters wandering around here. A lion with a human face, a massive bird with human legs, and ogre arms. It gets downright bizarre. Oh well. You slide down the hill and wave at them."Hello. I'm Shax! How are you all doing today?" What's the worst that could happen? An ant monster with four human arms and two horned satyr heads turns to you and lets loose an awful shriek. You raise an eyebrow. "Weird. Do you guys have some sort of leader I can talk to?""That would be me." A deep voice sounds out. A tall guy in deep red robes ducks through the entrance of a small hut. How did he even fit in there? "You're an odd specimen." He has a massive ceremonial mask on, but you can feel his eyes on you. "A cave goblin? How different from those mountain savages." He pokes you with a delicately carved staff while murmuring creepy stuff like 'fascinating' 'soft belly' 'hair needs washing' and other frankly offensive things.
>>31603185I don't know, things?
>>31603185You won't know until you try!
>>31603162>>31603145>>31603185I wanted the female dwarf, but for some reason she has a following in these threads.
>>31602943>>31602988Hey, it's a legitimate possibility from what we've seen so far.
>>31602917Hey! No spoilers!
It's time to cut this short. "Hey, I need a guide through the swamp. You know any one that can do that?" It is time to start negotiations."I do and can send them with you, of course. But I'll need something in return." Wow that was easy."What?" What's the worst that can happen?"I'll need a body part from you or one of your companions who are hiding on that hill." He splays his hands out.Immediately you respond. "I volunteer Allonces.""Hey!" The elf cries as she slides down.>Volunteer Allonces! Who knows what limb she'll get in return.>Volunteer someone else!>Do something tricky like have Bearbreath turn into an octopus and cut off an octopus leg or something.>Something else.>"Nah, I'm good." and leave.>"Give me your secrets!" Attack him and take his stuff.
>>31603233Fuck that shit.
>>31603233>"Nah, I'm good." and leave.
>>31603233>>"Give me your secrets!" Attack him and take his stuff.
>>31603233>Give him a scale from the lizard guy.
>>31603233>Volunteer Allonces! Who knows what limb she'll get in return.We never go back on our word.
>>31603233>"Nah, I'm good." and leave.Explore solo.
>>31603233>"Nah, I'm good." and leaveJust remember the place in case of someone gets a limb lopped off
>>31603220She needs a chance to git good, she got her ass beat by an imp.
>>31603233>>Volunteer Allonces! Who knows what limb she'll get in returnMaybe an ogre arm will make her less sucky
>>31603233>Do something tricky like have Bearbreath turn into an octopus and cut off an octopus leg or something.or>"Give me your secrets!" Attack him and take his stuff.
>>31603233Give him a lizard tail. Those grow back, right?
>>31603233Would toenail clippings be acceptable? Or maybe a lock of hair? I think everyone is kinda attached to their limbs.
>>31603233>Volunteer Allonces! Who knows what limb she'll get in return.She needs a power boost
>>31603233>Volunteer Allonces! Who knows what limb she'll get in return.She needs the power.
>>31603291He said a body part so any of those work. He cant even say no since he already said the word. We could give a lizard scale, nail, hair, skin or anything really. But anon just want to leave i guess so whatever.
>>31603298>>31603309I think you guys are in for a rude awakening.
>>31603323I wonder why they don't just attack him, instead of just whimping out.
>>31603233>"Nah, I'm good." and leave.Or >Do something tricky like have Bearbreath turn into an octopus and cut off an octopus leg or something.
>>31603233>>>Do something tricky like have Bearbreath turn into an octopus and cut off an octopus leg or something.Goblins are tricky. Let's do the goblin thing.
>>31603233>"Give me your secrets!" Attack him and take his stuff.
>>31603349Attacking will not get us a guide. Probably.
Consider that if we just give him bits he'll probably voodoo hex us with them for being a bad sport.
>>31603370Will get us loot, and we can aggressively convince him to help us.>>31603376Then we fight him then.
Guys, you can stop samefagging now. It is not really that important of a decision.
That's a lot of votes. Guess I'll start writing.
>>31603392its a better way than last time where votes popped up in the last 2 minutes.
>>31603417Why would anyone samefag in my quest? Nothing is that serious.
>>31603402Final destination voting?
>>31603437I wouldn't worry about it. I've always thought people call samefag way too often.
>>31603437That's why i am surprised.
"I was just kidding, jeez." You wouldn't actually do something your loyal minions wouldn't like. "But why do you need a limb? What kinda freaky stuff are you doing here?""I'm searching for the perfect body. Collecting many specimens is necessary for this research," He begins to explain the process and rant for several minutes. Everyone is very uncomfortable, and doesn't know where to look because if you start glancing around the huts you'll see something like a giant centipede with human fingers on each claw and a goat head or something, and no one wants to see that.After he begins talking about the perfect being's divine radience, you decide enough is enough. "But seriously, we gotta find a way through the swamp. Any advice? You live near it so you've gotta know something."He turns his gigantic mask to face you. "Of course. You've been delightful company, with your marshmellow soft belly and the exquisite thighs of your elf friend here." First of all, she doesn't have exquisite thighs. Second of all, what is a marshmellow? "The only advice I can give is that there are several spirits in the swamp dedicated to drowing people. Do not follow any dryads regardless of what they say. Now, if you'll excuse me, your friend's marvelous cat gives me an idea." He ducks back into his tent, and comes out with a smock and hacksaw. Very magical.Well. No leads there. Sitri comes up to you. "Hey, Shax, he brought up dryads. I know he said not to trust them, but I know a few songs that tame nature spirits. If you'd like, I can try to do a quick little bardic ritual and whip us up a guide.">We'll just hit up that town. thanks for the offer, Sitri!>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.>I'm plowing through the swamp! We'll just use your ritual in an emergency.
>>31603680>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.
>>31603680Swamps are terrible. Just run through it and spend no more time doing so than you absolutely have to.
>>31603680>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.Fuck it why not.
>>31603680>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.Sitri's the best.
>>31603680>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.Just get ready to punch it in the dick.
>>31603680>>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.My brain says no but my body says yes.
>>31603754you do know they are plants?and mostly female
>>31603772You can punch anything in the dick if you are angry enough.
>>31603754>>31603772You never know.
That'd be a pretty head lead to beat.Sitri charmed you all with her fuzziness!Writing.
>>31602529 Chief Fouldrinker, henceforth you shall beruler of /tg/we shall never leave you.*_* NEVER!
>>31603680>I can see no downsides in conducting a ritual for swamp spirits that we have little knowledge of.Is this the perfect plan or what? Seriously though, Sitri's music can tame anyone so let's do that.
>>31603680Wheres her goat beard?She can't be a she goat with out it.
>>31603918>>31603918For some reason I assumed she had a six pack and didn't wear a shirt. Not in a lewd way either I just thought she looked like a dude.
>>31603991it makes sense that her people don't wear clothes other than vest.
"Yeah, sure , why not?" You say, as the party walks away from the creepy guy's hut. "I mean, they can't lie if you've tamed them, right? Aren't they like your slaves or something at that point?"Sitri laughs, "Sure! I mean, probably."You scratch your head. "You've done this before, right?""Nope! That's why I wanted to try it out." Sitr gives you a grin and runs a hand through her hair, curls settling back in exactly where they were. You don't know why she bothers.Sitri busies herself with gathering materials for the ritual, while the party settles down around a camp and starts chatting. Reklatul tells fables from his homelands, Allonces tells folk stories, and Brokagh tells some ghost stories, though you didn't listen to those. Not because you were scared! Because Sitri pulls you and Allonces aside.She holds up some paint. "Hey! I mixed together the berries and stuff. We gotta paint our bodies in certain patterns and then dance to the music. I need two dancers. You and Allonces, preferably."You scratch your head. "I got no clue how to dance."Allonces holds up her fists excitedly, "Do we dance naked? In the moonlight?!"Sitr narrows her eyes and points at you, "Of course you do." Then she shakes her head, and quickly addresses Allonces, "No and also no. We can start whenever you'd like actually. But it is going to be pretty hard to pull off. I hope you know how to dance better than a rank amateur." Hey! "Otherwise we won't be able to please these spirits.>Give me a d20 roll for your festiveness!
>>31604127Bitch you cant step to this.
>>31604127>>31604108C-can we dance naked anyway?
>>31603872Dude. Don't go putting words in my mouth. I agree that chief's pretty cool though.
>>31604108Shax is the best dancer. her every motion is grace incarnate. Try spinning, that's a neat trick.
>>31604187What is that from?
>>31604326Birdy the Mighty. It's good.
>>31604400Shut your whore mouth.
>>31604448This thread's weird. Is it mating season or something?
>>31604473its Easter sunday, so all that is left is the perverts.
>>31604473Its egg laying zombie rabbit jesus day :D
You cover yourself in paint, and Allonces strips down to some barely decent amount of clothing before getting Sitri to paint her up, too. She calls you over to a weird circle she stamped into the ground, and tells you to just follow the tune, taking off her vest and painting herself as well. "H-hey, I thought we weren't going to be naked." They're still in some underwear, but still.Sitri winks at you, "I'm used to dancing like this. I don't know why the elf girl is doing it, though."Allonces puts her hands on her hips and laughs. "I gotta get into the spirit of things! I'm a noble savage!" She holds up her hands at you, and makes clawing motions, "Rawr! I'll eat you up!"You cross your arms, attempting to shield yourself from imagined stares. "Hey! That's offensive to true savages. I'd never eat a goblin. Or an elf." Allonces' giggle just annoys you.Soon after, Sitri starts playing a song on her pipes, using her unusual gait to start hopping and skipping around in the circle. It's a pretty catchy tune, you have to admit. Allonces grins and starts dancing some sort of weird mockery of a tribal dance while laughing. At least she's having a good time. You're still pretty embarrassed, so you just close your eyes and start moving. Some time passes, and you hear a whooping cheer. Snapping your eyes open you see the boys all sitting on some rocks and watching."Go boss! You're really cutting a rug out there. Or the grass? Something."Oh jeez, no one will respect you now. But you see what got their attention. The circle is glowing brightly, and small fairies are dancing around in the circle as well, like tiny glowing snowflakes. You fight your shyness and keep going. Eventually a green spirit floats into the circle, the glow fading reveals a wooden woman with green hair who begins cavorting around as well. Sitri opens her eyes and gives you a wink, before dancing to the dryad, taking her hand, and starting to cavort with it.
It is a lewd dance. That's all you're going to say on the matter.After the dance, Sitri has her arm hanging on the dryad's back, looking a little flushed and out of breath. "...so that's why we need you to show us how to get through the swamp. Think you can do that for me?"The dryad rests her hand on Sitri's. "Of course, noble singer. I would love to help make your life even a little easier."You're pretty convinced this worked! The dryad starts to lead you through the swamp. She'd like to know where you'd like to go? She mentions a temple a bit off the beaten path.>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!>Some sorta winged serpent temple? Let's check it out.
>>31604215sry. and agreed.
>>31604779>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!
>>31604779>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!Got to finish fast for the dragon lady.
>>31604779>>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!let's get stronk
>>31604779Straight to the Altar.Every sidequest is another moment our boyz might die without our supervision.
>>31604779>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!Despite our god like dance moves I am still hesitant on going somewhere a creature noted for lying and drowning people suggests
>>31604779>>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!
No time for anything but business.Shax is a consummate professional.Writing.
>>31604742>Allonces' giggle just annoys you.Hit her mouth with the sharp side of our sword. That would solve so many problems.
>>31604779>Some sorta winged serpent temple? Let's check it out.
>>31604779Good thing Sitri is here to take care of any lewd dancing required.
>>31604779>Head straight to the Altar of Light. You're trying to make good time here!We don't have unlimited time to waste in this continent. Dragon lady is waiting us. And we have a lot do still.
>>31604779You know, I'm still thinking we should go look into that winged serpant temple after we're done with the Altar. Who knows what we might find? Winged serpant mounts would be radical!
>>31604979I could go for some mounts.
>>31604962But Dominions continent! Not smelling the roses would be a crime. If we found any roses. This temple? Pass.
>>31604979>Shax will never become the Red Baron>There will be no high mobility air-raid squadrons
>>31605216She can just spin really fast to achieve takeoff.What's the worst that could happen
>>31605250Shax vs the Skelecopter brigade
You make good time through the disgusting swamp. It smells bad, nothing is edible, murky water gets everywhere, there are a ton of monsters that you have to kill, there are gross animals and cute crocodiles, but worst of all is you have to listen to Allonces complain the whole way. About bugs. About smells. About no one being good conversation partners.The dryad and Sitri stick together pretty close, and Fetidclaw looks relieved that he doesn't have to lead the way for once, and mostly hangs out with you. He talks about all sorts of stuff, from how to properly make an arrow, to his hobbies. He says seeing the world with you is one of the best things that happened to him. It makes you feel like a good leader!As predicted, the skeletons travel through the swamp easily, and you gotta fight them off every few hours or so. It isn't easy, but until something more serious shows up, you don't get hurt. "What is the deal with all these skeletons, Reklatul? Where do they even get enough bodies for these things."The lizard falls back to you for the discussion. "Oh we have plenty of bodies, and Sauromantic research knows how to use them. They are typically used as a harassment tactic." Well they are certainly harassing you. "Still, they've followed us this far. There is probably a clutch of Sauromancers tracking me through some sort of scrying method." Oh, good.You are getting fed up with this, putting a hand on the hilt of your sword you look behind you. "Let's just turn around and kill the guys."Reklatul shrugs. "They'd just feel me coming and keep their distance."You don't wanna have to keep putting up with this. Still, your thoughts are cut short as a large cave entrance stands before you. Inside the cave is a spooky glow."Here's the Altar of Glimmers, singer." The dryad intones.>Barge in the place and wreck it up!>Tell the dryad to check it out since she is disposable.>Get Bearbreath to scope it out since he is amazing.
>>31605334>>Barge in the place and wreck it up!WE RAID NOW
>>31605303>skeleton helicoptersPlease God no.
>>31605334>Scope it our yourself since you're amazing
>>31605334>>Barge in the place and wreck it up!
>>31605334>you have to listen to Allonces complain the whole way. About bugs. About smells. About no one being good conversation partners.How does hitting her mouth with the sharp side of our sword sound now? It is for the greater good, i tell you.
>>31605334What about sending the orc in first? Because he's our dedicated sneak?
>>31605334>Barge in the place and wreck it up!
>>31605334>Barge in the place and wreck it up!Also ask the seamom if she could stop them skelemancers from watching us. If she could that'd be great.
>>31605334>>Barge in the place and wreck it up!For Sea Mom and What's-his-name-who-sticks-people-in-the-ground!
>>31605334>Barge in the place and wreck it up!Eh.
>>31605334>Barge in the place and wreck it up!You are in a swamp. Git Shrek'd or git rekt.
>>31605334A salute to Sitri for enduring even more unwanted attention in service of Shax. Unless she has a thing for Dryads I guess.And I guess where Bearbreath's quality is being amazing, Fetidclaw's quality is in being...lacking enough to make others feel better.
ain't no raid like a shax raid cause a shax raid starts suddenly and ends in victoryWriting.
>>31605554He also killed the shit out of a bunch of kenku.
>>31605606Definitely not more than Shax, though.
>>31605629Who is counting anways!
"Oooh, an ancient cavern. Full of mystery!" Allonces claps her hands, "I can't wait to see what's inside!"You point your sword into the cavern's entrance. "Alright, boys, we're gonna ransack this place. Kill anything inside, take anything shiny, and let's find that stupid altar!" Brokagh and the gnolls cheer. Sitri just shrugs and waves at the dryad, before skipping inside.Reklatul is the last one in. "Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean. People have been fighting over these altars for years, and no one has claimed one yet."You pat his cute lizard snout. "There, there, coward. We're professional raiders. Don't worry about a thing." The walls come alive and several dozen razor sharp whips covered in jewels start writhing about. Oh, jeez.The group manages to get through this area with little problem, but the traps just keep getting worse. A huge marble pillar swings down, which you narrowly avoid. A pitfall opens up, which Bearbreath narrowly avoids and then covers in spiderwebs. Allonces shakily thanks him as she walks over it.Eventually you reach a wide chamber, with softly glowing light refracting throughout the chamber in a dazzling rainbow. A rock chair sits in the middle of a raised mound. There hasn't been a single piece of treasure so far, and you're pretty disappointed. So, when you see the jeweled cup on the platform behind the chair, you get pretty excited! That is when a huge marble golem breaks out of the wall and approaches you.What's the plan?>Everyone! All out attack!>Let's just smash the altar and go.>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch before
>>31605891>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch before
>>31605891>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch beforepotential plot ahoy!
I do need to eat supper, so there will be a short break. I'll resume writing afterward!
>>31605891>>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch beforeWe can take him, so we must talk first.
>>31605891First stand on the altar then>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch before
>>31605891>>Hey are you an elemental? I've talked to a bunch before.
>>31605891>Let's just smash the altar and go.I never really liked elementals. Never made sense to me.
>>31605891>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch beforeAsk if they're related!
>>31605932>Going for supper in the midst of battle
>>31605891>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch beforeand if that fails.Everyone! All out attack!
>>31605891>Hey are you an elemental I've talked to a bunch beforeIf negotiation looks like it isn't going to work out then try to get a surprise attack on him and spend a Tidal point for more armor penetration on chopping one of his ankles off.
>>31605891> Get in the turtle stance. Demolish it with the Bite of the Snapping Turtle.
>>31605947They are embodiments of elements, what doesn't make sense?
>>31606121>fire elemental>wood elementalThat sort of thing. It's just opinions.
>>31605891Cutle the fuck out of that marble dude.
>>31605932we'll wait. take your time.
>>31606252I just got done. I was cooking while writing. Multitasking is the key to a productive lifestyle. I see the votes are nearly unanimous.Writing!
>>31606293https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1p0_R8ZLB0 something to look at while we wait.
>>31606147Depending on who you talk to wood could be an element. Or its a nature elemental made of wood.
Hey this thing looks familiar. "Oh, hey, wait. Are you an elmental? You look like a rock guy and metal guy I know." You glance over at Allonces. "What the heck is a 'glimmer elemental' anyway? Everything on this dumb continent doesn't make any sense."Reklatul raises a claw, "Actually, the Altar Guardians are not so much sentient as they are an automated defender that-" Does he ever shut his cute mouth up? Jeez.He is cut off by the golem swinging a huge fist downward, causing a loud crash. Some rocks fall from the ceiling, but the cave doesn't collapse.You wave your sword. "Yoohoo! Did you hear me? Are you an elemental or not, you bum?"Reklatul clears his throat. "As I was saying, the Altar Guardians are elementals, but not sentient in any way. You'd be better off addressing the sky, or the ground for guidance."Doubtfully you look at the ground, and say, "Hey, ground? Are you controlling that rock monster?" Reklatul just shakes his head and covers his face with his scaley hands. There is no answer."Look, unless you defeat it, you can't claim the throne for yourself, Shax."You give the lizard another look. The golem is lumbering at you now. "I dunno, smashing the altar seems way easier than this.">Smash the golem! Seize the altar!>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?
>>31606541>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?
>>31606541>Smash the golem!>Smash the altar!>Why not both!
>>31606541>>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?
>>31606541>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!Cuttlefish Turtle Hybrid Style! Spend the tidal point for armour piercing.
>>31606541>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?Mom's friend asked to smash it. Surely she will give us cool things if we do it.
>>31606541>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?Pffft, this lizard doesn't know what he's talking about.
>>31606541>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!Powah
>>31606541Cuttle the golem. Cuttle his face in.
>>31606541>>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!Smash it in the runes.
>>31606541>>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!
>>31606541> Smash the everything
>>31606541>Smash the altar! Who cares about the stupid thing?Sidequests. Never give up on them!
>>31606541>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!
>>31606541>>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!We can smash the alter after seeing what happens.
>>31606541Actually, changing my vote here >>31606574Maybe we can ask the Seamother directly what to do with the alter.
>>31606541>>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!We count as a prophet right?
>>31606541>Smash the golem! Seize the altar!Just think of the xp
>>31606541>smash that altarWhat the hell would we want with the power this temple could give us anyway? We're already the number one seablade.
Alright!I'm going to go ahead and call the vote here.It is time for writing!
>>31606712Got to remember to get that fighting experience too. Also we cant loot shit if the golem is in the way.
>>31606541>Smash everything.The one true path.
You get yourself in an attack stance. You'll see what this lizard guy keeps prattling on about, and check out this altar business. Too bad he is useless in a fight! Something about his poet's soul is made more for battling the woes of women than foes of the battlefield. No wonder they send skeletons after him all the time. You would, too.Anyway. This thing is huge. We're talking big. But there is probably nothing your choppa cannot cuttle. It lumbers forward, and Bearbreath launches a spear of ice at it, sinking into the golem with a crack. Allonces starts chanting, dark energies surrounding her and her spear as she dashes to the right, lancing the golem's leg with pinprick wounds. From those wounds dark chains start to creep around the leg, forming dark weights. The next few steps are noticeably labored.Sitri plays a quick tune on her pipes, and you feel indescribably lighter. Fetidclaw peppers the golem with arrows, each one spreading a lattice of cracks as it sinks into the golem's arm, until the spiderweb of flaws causes it to fall off. Jeez! Your allies are a little too reliable. There isn't going to be much left for you to do at this rate.That's when two more golems crawl out of the wall, one with giant spiked club fists, and the other with only one arm, a long cylinder.What's the plan, boss?>Who is attacking which golem? You don't know what either of the new ones can do yet! The first one is almost down.
>>31607082Smash the cylinder arm one ourselves right now, that shit's ominous.
>>31607082>long cylinderSounds like it's geek the mage time!Have Allonces focus on the almost dead one. And somebody can distract the spiked club fist one.
>>31607082Decapitate first one then,Us vs the other with only one arm, a long cylinder.Them vs one with giant spiked club fists
>>31607082Spike club guy fights Bearbreath, Sitri, Fetidclaw.Tubeguy fights Shax and Allonces
>>31607082Fuck cylinders, only good thing that comes in cylinders is pringles.
>>31607082> Allonces and Fetidclaw attack drillarm.>Bearbreath and Sitri attack clubber. Lizardguy helps somehow or he will be used as bait to draw the golem's attention.>Shax finish of this one and goe to help others.
>>31607082Shax smashes cylinder arm with her cuttler.Allonces finishes the original/keeps it chained with her dark spear. Everyone else hinder/kill the spike club guy.
Alright! Let's see if I can't make a cohesive attack plan from these suggestions.Also! Give me a d20 roll.
Rolled 1>>31607258Here goes nothing.
Rolled 2>>31607258Time to fail
Rolled 7>>31607258Well, let's hope -->>31607282God damnit anon.
>>31607282Time to Shax.
>>31607082Holy shit is Allonces being competent?Go murder the shit out of the golem with the cylinder arm.
>>31607282You fucked up!
>>31607282Yep, whole lot of nothing you got right there.
>>31607282>>31607301>>31607303The suffering continues.
>>31607258>>31607282Looks like there are things our scuttler cannot scuttle
>>31607282dear god were fuckedREROLL
>>31607137>Have AlloncesShe is still learning and the magic we chose for her isn't offensive anon.
>>31607309>>31607306>>31607303>>31607301>>31607282>5.2 averageGOD DAMN SHAXSTEP IT UP
Are people really surprised on this out come this quest rarely rolls above 10.i just find it funny that people forget or get a big head after 1 succes.
aw man I was trying to finish up before 8 pmWriting.
>>31607423just keep going until midnight.
You glance over at the tube arm guy. That thing looks suspicious. Spike fists is easy. You can handle spike fists. But tube arms? Who knows what that could be! "Hey, Allonces! You finish off that one. It is super weak now so it should be an even fight!""Hey!""Everyone else? You take on the spike fist guy like you just took on that other guy! I'll handle the tube guy myself." If it is scary, you gotta settle it yourself. You're the boss after all.You get your sword ready, and dash at the tube guy. A light flares up, and blinds you temporarily, then you hear a loud bang. Your vision blurs and when you come to, you're looking at the ceiling. What happened? You grab your head and sit up. When you do, you see Brokagh standing over you, fighting Reklatul. Fetidclaw and Sitri are down for the count against the spike fist monster, where Bearbreath and his lynx are trying to hold it back. Allonces is running around the tube golem, whose arm will glow before blasting a blindingly light and large sorcerous beam outwards, leaving a smoking crater where it was. A quick study of the room shows that those craters lace the area. What the heck?Brokagh looks behind him when he hears you moving. "Boss! You're awake! This guy tried stabbing you while you were down." He's punching incredibly fast. Reklatul seems to be dodging the blows, however. He has some sort of ceremonial dagger out. "I don't know what his game is, but he turned on us as soon as you went down." His voice trails off, as he has to focus on dodging Reklatul's knife work. A thin liquid drips from the blade.As you rise and grab your sword, his reptilian eyes dart to you then to Fetidclaw. He rolls over and grabs the gnoll by the scruff of his neck, drawing the blade across his throat. From the blood that sprays out, five blood red skeletons rise up, armed with halberds. It's gone from bad to worse. A lance of ice pierces the spike golem through the head and it falls. Two down, six to go.>What's the plan boss?
>>31607782Cut snakeman in half as if we're Guts and he's unnamed mook #43, then Cuttlecut that golem.
>>31607782Lizard guy, no! Why would you do this to me?
>>31607782>fetidclawIs bezerker rage a plan?
>>31607782Are the skeletons close enough to Rek to cleave? If yes; cleave the fuck outta them.
>>31607782Fetidclaw is dead? Fuuuuck.>What's the plan boss?We spin to win.
>>31607782Go into a BIGASS SWORDED RAGECOPTER
>>31607782Oh, HELL NO. Fuck that lizard's day up, no one betrays Shax Bonemurder. Then we wreck that golem.
>>31607782Fetid claw no! This quests mortality rate is always surprisingly high.
We really should have just smashed the altar and ran, but nnooooo we had to talk to the golem.
>>31607892A nat 1 does that, but wait was he the shaman that can bring people back to life?
>>31607782Welp. I realize this might be optimistic, but how about asking seamom for some help?
Not much for strategy right now? Alright!Writing.
>>31607782I'm surprised I'm not more upset that he died. Our party's only archer.Anyways, let's take a second go at the tube golem, readying our defensive stance. Once the fighting is done we can finally test out Bearbreath's revival magic.
>>31607892So far, only really among non-characterized mooks. I can't remember anyone notable before this. Unless you count potential recruits I guess.
>>31607908It would had happened any since the nat 1.
>>31607909No that was bearbreath. Thanks for reminding me and everyone he can do that by the way.>>31607939No rolls? I don't know if I should be worried.
>>31607947It's probably because he was thew least characterized of our group. Which means the least plot armor.
>>31607962Ah ok, then there is still hope.I forgot this means he comes back as a gnoll or a new species?
>>31607947Neb? Still elf girl barley managed to not die fighting that imp.
>>31607995Other species but I don't think he'd mind too much.
>>31607082>Something about his poet's soul is made more for battling the woes of women than foes of the battlefield. No wonder they send skeletons after him all the time. You would, too.Aw, and now that he's betrayed us, that budding crush has been destroyed.
>>31607995I dont know I think it is random.
>>31607975But that's Brokagh!I'm more upset about the loss of our cool lizardman friend.
>>31607962>No rolls? I don't know if I should be worried.Divine rage of loli goblin always succeeds.
>>31608034Honestly i'm clueless on when we got him.
>>31608034Lizards aren't cool. Turtles are.
>>31608034We had a bonding scene when we got drunk with him. I don't think we did anything with Fetidclaw.
>>31608065We picked him up when we were getting drunk in the bar when we first arrived on the continent.
>FetidclawHe had just found love too.
>>31608090He was talking about Fetidclaw i think
>>31608069All reptiles are cool. Shax seems to agree(?) or at least think lizards are cute while drunk.
>>31608120No he was right.
>>31607782Plan is thus:Brokagh, Allonces: Gun golemn.>Kite it to keep it from the rest of the engagement.Bearbreath and his Lynx>fight the blood skeletonsShax>Kill Keklatul>KILL REKLATUL>KILL. REKLATUL.
>>31608090I thought we got Fetidclaw from the gnolls.
>>31608069If turtles are so great why aren't we riding one around all day?
>>31608166Nope. Plan is swing the sword and break it all. If you can even call that a plan but it is what it is.
>>31608166revenge for our fallen comrade!dammit lizard bro, why!
>>31608180he's talking about lizzard guy.
>>31608189If it weren't for the ceremonial dagger, I'd expect mind control.
>>31608034He wasn't that cool. Fish-dudes are way cooler.
>>31608182we have yet to meet our own genji>yfw seamom rewards our efforts with one of her elite minions, a giant sea turtle which someone wrecks people's shit with his flippers
>>31608188The plan is to wreck that traitors asshole...With our sword.
>>31608221Two words.Asp turtles.
>>31608166I'll second this plan. Now that shit's serious I think a real plan is called for.
>>31608262It is not voting time anon
>>31608275No, it is NOT voting time.It is KILLING TIME!
What kinda jerk just kills someone like that, I mean really. And he was just knocked out on the ground, too! Reklatul's eyes dart around as the spike golem goes down. Bearbreath is free of his fight, so you figure he might help you out here. Still, you don't think that through much as you charge right at the lizard guy.You swing your sword in a wide arc, trying to catch the skeletons, but they sort of disintegrate and reform after the sword passes through, with a trail of whispy red dust. Now that just isn't fair. They read their halberds, but you manage to knock their weapons out of the air as they try to stab you. If you had phase technology, you woulda just phased through your sword there and stab you. Maybe they can only do it sometimes.Brokagh dashes around you, and does a flying kick to take out one skeleton's skull before doing a legsweep that phases through another. "Damn. These are going to be tricky."Allonces is visibly running out of breath in her fight with the tube golem. "Bear! Go help Elf! I'll finish off mister lizard." You're pretty upset at him for pretending to be a friend. Now that Brokagh has the skeletons all tangled up, you run at him."What is the deal with that? Trying to kill me and then actually killing my friends? That's pretty rude!"He dodges one of your lazy overhead swings and laughs, "I thought I could finish you off real quick when you were down for the count. If I did that and used you as an undead servant, I could probably finish off these golems. I've seen you fight. You'd be a great slave. After the golems go down, I claim the altar, and get started on the path to ascension. Sorry. The opportunity was too good to resist!"What a treacherous guy.>Roll d20! Let's finish him off?
Rolled 8>>31608294Shax luck.
Rolled 14>>31608294He forgot one very important thing, we're the boss.
Rolled 16>>31608294Dice I swear if you don't match our righteous fury right now.
>>31608327Make him suffer, Fouldrinker.
>>31608327Haha! Fuck you lizard guy. I hope we can get the skeletons off our backs now at least.
>>31608294>>ascension?doitdoitdoit but kill the bastard lizard first, noone makes a fool outta shax! (at least not to her knowledge)
>>31608327Paste the cunt.>>31608294Allonces actually got pretty competent after that magic training.
Rolled 20>>31608294Wreck his face!
>>31608294Are lizardmen like.. the goblins of the east? I respect his reasoning.
>>31608392Well this confirms he is a necromancer, and it looks like this area has the seats of power that elementals offered people(i remember some guy bitching we didn't go the elemental route before).
>>31608294Well now you are dead. How does it sound for an opportunity now? How about i have you resurrected and kill you again? Huh? Huh? Dickbutt lizard.
>>31608420I think Ascension is a completely different thing. A Dominionsy thing.
>>31608449Eh ascension is boring anyway.
>>31608497Better than descension.
You twist your grip on the sword, and bring it up in an uppercut swing, which Reklatul easily dodges. You twist it around, and spin with it through another swing, that is again dodged easily, but in the follow through, you bring it close to your body. You start to spin fast. Shifting your grip on the sword, you place one foot on the ground, and twist your arms into a powerful thrust, that drives right through Reklatul easily."You wanted me to be undead? Well. Now you're just regular dead!"Reklatul lifts one claw up, "That," Blood sputters from his mouth, "Could use a little work, Shax." He's right. You gotta brush up on your one liners. After the lizard goes down, you make quick work of the remnants.There is nothing else in the room. The druid gets Sitri back up and running, and you take a quick look around.Well. The room is empty now. Bearbreath walks up to you. "Soooo. Want me to resurrect Fetidclaw? Who knows what he'll come back as, though. I'm okay at tracking, and Brokagh knows some stuff, but he is still the best tracker we have. The components to reincarnate someone aren't easy to find on the main continent, and I don't have many here. If I do this now, I can only bring back one more person after this." >Yes.>Nope.>short vote period since the answer is pretty obvious
>>31608600>YesI hope this is the last time we just recruit people out of the blue.
>>31608600>NoBecause i am an edgy fagget
>>31608600save him, he made shax feel like a good leader! also wiseoldman
>>31608629>Oversized weapon Quest> Not recruiting randomsI think you're in the wrong quest buddy.
>>31608629Nah it still good, we just need to win them over.All we did with this guy is convince him to help us, but the others we won over.
>>31608629I certainly hope not.
>>31608629But he was cute and Shax was drunk.
>>31608600Do we get to use a table for this?
>>31608629Let's compromise, anon; no more recruiting while plastered. Deal?
>>31608600New goal: get more res ingrediants.
>>31608687Fuck side quest
>>31608672This would be pretty cool.
Alright! The most fun part of playing a druid in low level DnD has come! The ritual is conducted, and Fetidclaw reappears as:>roll 4d100>I will roll a die to determine which result wins.>>31608672H-how did you know?
Rolled 20, 94, 11, 81 = 206>>31608741
Rolled 92, 51, 63, 20 = 226>>31608741Something shoggoth like, please
Rolled 81, 76, 48, 56 = 261>>31608741
Rolled 70, 84, 79, 9 = 242>>31608741
Rolled 94, 34, 22, 48 = 198>>31608741
>>31608741Cmon anthropomorphic pony.
Rolled 72, 56, 58, 53 = 239>>31608741
Rolled 94, 84, 54, 4 = 236>>31608741cmon fetdiclaw LIVE
Rolled 3, 52, 8, 98 = 161>>31608788i just want to be included
Rolled 2>>31608751>>31608756>>31608757>>31608768>>31608770>>31608776Let's see what we get.
>>31608757Young adult female Kender. Oh gods what have we done?
Rolled 56, 56, 49, 10 = 171>>31608828BoooooringWe already have an orc.
>>31608828So we've got an adult Orc hottie for a tracker. This quest just gets better and better!
>>31608756Adult female bog standard orc.
>>31608828Standard Female Adult OrcHow boring. I was hoping he'd end up as a Modron or a Lamia or something.
>>31608828Well, maybe he'll find love now (?)
>>31608828>Female orc>Distractingly alluring to members of the opposite sexOH GODS NOTHEY MULTIPLY
>>31608828OrcFemaleAdultStandard.Too think my>>31608751DwarfMaleChildGully dwarf lost.
>>31608894Well at least he counts for the requesite lesbians in a quest
>>31608828I like this result. I like it a lot.
>>31608828Adult Female Orc>>31608821I Don't know if it's a good or bad thing Catgirl missed the cutoff.
Rolled 48, 50, 62, 47 = 207does he retain memories after res? if so i envisage shenanigans in his new body
>>31608924of course, otherwise we wouldn't have bothered
>>31608909Oh as if Allonces wasn't already distracting enough.
Guys... what happens if we die and get reincarnated? Will it be just as random?
>>31608923It'd be a baby catgirl, so it was for the best.
>>31608967It should be!
>>31608967The gods intercede because they think it's funny
I find it funny that people forgot we can use 1 fate point to recruit some one agianst thier will.
Just an adult Ork? How boring...
>>31608967The day when our oversized weapon become the undersized weapon....
>>31608967If Bearbreath does it, aye. Alternately, if we die and can't be reincarnated, it could always become Overcompetent Druid Quest, with Bearbreath as the new protagonist. Might even drag rolls up.
>>31608967Yes, and hopefully if we get any bigger we will get a new proportionally Oversized Weapon.
>>31608982But she woulda been so adorable!
>>31608994I don't think anyone forgot, we just haven't found someone worthy.No one was on board for recruiting the Axe Girl so we're just waiting for somebody cooler I think.
>>31609042I'm surprised we didn't use it on the linch or the metal elemental.
>>31609042>No one was on board for recruiting the Axe Girl so we're just waiting for somebody cooler I think.Why don't people want Axe Girl? She's awesome.
>>31609009Or barbecued elf quest.
>>31609042Axe Girl is better as a rival anyway.
>>31609026>>31608967hahahaha shax will never die...right?
>>31609042I swear we're going to go through the whole quest keeping that thing as some sort of "too awesome to use" ability.
>>31609042I would have recruited axe girl! And speaking of which, when are we going to meet another Oversized Weapon User?
>>31609063Because we need a rival!What kind of adventurer doesn't have a rivla?
>>31609042>recruiting your archrivalNo. Just no. If she doesn't acknowledge us legit then what's the point?
>>31609084Because the QM confirmed other oversize weapon users exist.
>>31609063Because being her eternal rival is more fun.
>>31609078That'll require triple 1's and that never happened...right?
>>31609063She sucks. All she has is her broken half ork buddy and unlike us she doesn't have the skills to handle shit herself.
>>31609097They aren't going to be as adorable as axe girl. She's got delusional snobby cute LOCKED.
>>31609042People wanted Axe Girl, it was just either her or Sitri, and obviously Axe Girl, being Rival, would show up again. So it was better to grab Sitri.
>>31609097Yes, but the other ones aren't adorable naive girls using weapons twice their size with no combat experience!Plus snobby noblegirl tsundere!
>>31609073I can't even ponder the rolls if that happened. Please no.
>>31609103>recruiting for combat ability>this questShit man, what are you doing?
>>31609149I want to beat her eventually and take her axe.
>>31609147But think of the fun of explaining our chaotic evil dark elf husbando to our parents.
>>31609144>aren't adorable naive girls using weapons twice their size with no combat experience!she is the opposite of that actually.
>>31609176She's not a girl?
>>31609149> not recruiting for combat ability he saysHave you seen our minions?
>>31609166I can't wait for Allonce's parents to show up in the quest. Didn't she say she was somewhere around 21 in her introduction?
>>31609163>and take her axe.over our buffed up sword?
>>31609084Actually, I don't think she's the rival.We're the rival. At least in the sense that we're the 'Gary Motherfucking Oak' of this story.We go on epic quests, foil her grandest of plans, and are persistently cooler than her.
Bearbreath buries Fetidclaw in a small mound of dirt, places an acorn on it and begins to chant. The acorn sprouts into a seedling, which quickly grows into a small tree that then withers and quickly dies. Moments later the rotting remains of the tree shrivels into dust and fades away. It's kinda creepy to watch. After all this ends, Bearbreath's chant fades away. He gets up and brushes the dirt away, revealing...A stunningly beautiful orc woman, nude as the day she was born. Which was today, technically. Bearbreath wakes her up with a slap on the face. "Hey. Get up, Fetid."Fetid places a hand on her forehead and sits up with a groan. "I have the worst headache right now." She then rubs her throat. "Feels like someone ripped my throat out..." That's when Fetid stops and blinks. "The hell is up with my vision?" She lifts a hand in front of her face and stops dead cold. She immediately turns to Bearbreath. "You didn't." Brokagh's eyes are bugging out of his head. Bearbreath shrugs. "You did. Oh fuck what the fuck am I" Fetidclaw leaps up and looks at himself. Fetid is statuesque. We're talking stacked. Built. And fit. The old tracker is silent for a long while as the archer checks out her new body. Spends a little long checking out her new body. Everyone was very uncomfortable. "Well. At least I'm younger, right?""Please find some clothes." Allonces says, exasperated."What's the rush?" Brokagh says.You try to forget about how dumb this all is. Back to the altar!>Seize it.>Smash it.
>>31609195The equivalent of twenty one.If she was a twenty one year old elf she'd be a little kid probably
>>31609195if by 21 you mean like 78
>>31609208>Seize it.INFINITE POWAAAA and also possibly a way to make our sword awesomer
>>31609192she is Gothic lolita, who is older than us and has combat experience.
>>31609208>Seize itascension here we come
>>31609208>Convene with the sea mother to find out her wishes.Gotta make sure we don't offend the patron deity of some of one of our better minions.
>>31609208>Smash it.I don't know if that's gay or not, Brokagh.
>>31609208>Ask momWhy not.
>>31609208>Seize it.How old was fetidclaw anyway?
>>31609208>Smash it. Unsmashed altars are a direct affront to our raid.
>>31609237She claims to have combat experience, but what she shows is the kinda amateurish stuff she had to have figured out on her own.And her being older than us is kinda iffy due to goblins aging faster than humans.I'm not even sure about the goth loli bit either.
>>31609251It has a girls body, and that is all that matter.sthats what hentai has taught me.
>>31609243She didnt even tell us that we were working for her for most of the work we were doing for her. This is clearly all part of her kekaku.
>>31609217>>31609218Is that clarified later?>"What? Um, I'm just over twenty two. I had to run away from my family to get out of the Forest so young." Isn't that, like, five in elf years? You're pretty sure Beyto said he was over a hundred. You haven't extensively interacted with elves, but you're confident they are all super old. "What does that have to do with anything? Anyway! It was three months ago whe-"
>>31609208ask mom and seize??
>>31609208>Smash it.ascension is dumb.
>>31609280she is from a royal family that knows alot of fighting style, but because of her confidence she is a show off.
>>31609208>>Seize it.then Ask mother.
>>31609300Yeah, we ask her if she's like eighty later on, before going to this continent. She was talking about not wanting to die or something unimportant like that
All these votes.Alright. Writing.
>>31609203No. We'd have both.
>>31609319... She's the only one claiming to be from a royal family with tons of fighting experience.And she can't even beat us. When we literally just made up our fighting style.
>>31609208Stick your sword in it. Better sword, right?
Sword axe chucks.
>>31609394Admittedly Shax is kind of actually really fucking powerful.
>>31609394We have stated that her fighting style is more refined compared to our wild free style, but also said that hers is too showy while our is straight to the point.
Where does Shax fall on the moe scale?
>>31609447No, no we didn't.That isn't actually a thing we have stated.Stop making stuff up.We did say her doing a dancy kinda thing when we almost killed her bodyguard was more elegant than our improvised dancy kinda thing though.
>>31609512Around evilgood moe compared to Allonces Dork moe and Axegirls delusional moe.
Hmmm. Sea Mom's friend wanted you to smash this altar. But you do kinda wanna check out what all this fuss about seizing it is all about. Maybe you ought ask the Sea Mother yourself? You sit down and attempt to commune.Soon, it feels like you're floating as cold water feels like it is covering your body."Oh, hey, Shax. How's it goin' little buddy?"There is that voice again."Hi, Sea Mom. I'm in front of this altar thing on Yselathe, and I'm wondering if I'm supposed to smash it or not. You have some sort of friend god on this continent who thinks that smashing it would make you happy, I think?""Who? Sintalika? That guy is always clinging onto me. 'Hey [you can't understand this noise], Ferinnik is picking on me again! Waah!' What a whiner. I don't care if the surface is covered in darkness or not, 'cause I'm just gonna drown the whole place eventually anyway.""Oh, so if I gain control of this altar, you'd be cool with that, then?""Sure, I guess. Go for it. It might be fun to see what happens..."You open you eyes and stand up. "Alright! Let's seize this altar!" You walk over to it and sort of look at it. "Uh, anyone know how?" You grab the cup on it and drink from it. Light explodes in your brain, filling your entire mind.=====================================================================>20/48 BtB exp>52/40 MSiF exp>28/40 CyRCTHaM exp>15/16 FMMM exp, 2/2 Tidal Points>Something bars your progress...What would you like to spend your My Sword is Fight point on?>Enchantment of the Turtle>Grouchiness of the Terrapin>Softshell Soft belly>Tokka Form!>Improved Improvised Dual Wild>Rahzar's Wild Ride>Struggle of the Sea Turtle
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the Terrapin
>>31609625Oh, right. Yo ucan't get Rahzar's yet. Sorry!But the other stuff is open.
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinTime to push for turtles are cute.
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinGOTTA GET DAT SWORDSAINTIN
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinWe're almost there.
>>31609625Oh that wild ride speaks to me but just this once>Grouchiness of the Terrapin
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinSword Saint soon, fellow goblins!
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinGrouchy as fuck.
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinThe time of the sword saint is nearly upon us.
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinGotta be the sword saint.
>>31609625>Grouchiness of the TerrapinCHOO CHOO NO BRAKES ON THE SWORD SAINT TRAIN
) Enchantment of the Spotted Turtle - You've always thought spotted turtles were pretty. And now you have a grace to match their beauty! While spinning or using any other turtle maneuver and attack, you can no longer be knocked off balance and gain greater control over the direction! ) Grouchiness of the Terrapin - Sometimes you get super cranky, and that is okay. Some turtles live for hundreds of years, and they probably get cranky, too! With this, while you are in Wary Tortoise stance or any turtle move, you automatically execute a deadly counter attack when someone tries to hurt you! ) Softshell Soft Belly - You know for a fact that softshell turtles have soft, cute bellies. And while your own stomach is soft and also cuter than any of those flabby "beautiful women" those boys go on about, the lesson here is this: Everyone has their own metaphysical "soft belly"! And you know just where to find it! Turtle Attacks and attacks while in a turtle stance will aim and strike weakpoints without fail! ) Tokka Form! - While in the Wary Tortoise Stance, you can lash out with one arm. You won't be able to make a precise strike, but you might be able to land some blows in a crowded environment! ) Improved Improvised Dual Wield - Sometimes when you're hackin' and whackin' you find yourself outgunned. In those situations, it is handy to pick something up and get twice the smackin' for your trouble! You're really good at incorporating every day blunt objects in your attack patterns now. ) Struggle of the Sea Turtle - Sea Turtle babies fight for their lives the moment they are born! The trials of these adorable reptiles are something you can sympathize with. You get a large increase in general toughness!
>>31609730Smash and crash we would needStruggle of the see turtleEnchantedment of the spotted turtleturtles are cuteSoft shell soft belly
Grouchiness looks like the clear winner!You can now take: Why do People Keep Calling me a Sword Saint?!This is a new tree that grants Shax unique and advanced sword techniques! These may even have properties beyond that of just standard physical attacks... But the path of a swordsman is treacherous! What greater dangers will Shax face when she is recognized as... a sword saint!Also! Thank you everyone for playing. I didn't mean for it to run this late. Now I gotta get going. I hope you enjoyed the thread! Thank you for reading, playing, and contributing. You guys are as much a part of this as I am! And you often do more work then me in keeping everything straight. Thanks so much! I am probably gonna run OWQ again Wednesday. Hope to see you then!
>>31609819thx 4 runin budi gud thred
>>31609625>Softshell Soft Belly
>>31609819awesome to follow along chief, thanks for running!
>>31609819See you later Chief, thank you for running!
>>31609819Thanks for the run Chief, see ya' Wednesday!
>>31609819See ya then!
Does Sea Mom plan to flood the world through global warming?
>>31610059If you mean in part by beating that shit Goddess responsible for freezing so much of her glorious liquid, preventing her from kicking off the Watery Apocalypse with a mile high Tsunami of Teritorial Reclamation, then yes that is Parton the master plan. Death to the Chilly Oppressor!
>>31609730I doubt you're still here, but if so would you mind removing the arrowhead from the line connecting "As Expected of Me!" to "She Bitch Wolf Queen"? Just seems odd that that's the only arrowhead in any of the main trees.
>>31610556Sure, but I had it in there so it's obvious where it connects at a glance. To me it looked like busy triangles in the middle of the tree without something to break them up.I was probably over thinking it.