This is the day that you leave home, you say goodbye to your father and mother and head offWhere will you go?>Enlist in the imperial army>Become and apprentice to a wizard>Go to the nearest city and become a member of the fighters guild>Go to the nearest city and become a petty criminal>Other
>Other (kill self for making another quest)
Other (Murder Wife and Child)
>>30197004>>Become and apprentice to a wizardeh
>>30197004>Other (start a new farm)
Become a criminal wizard on a farm.
Rolled 44>>30198175This>>30197038What's up? I like these kinda quests. I don't need to know a ton of lore to get involved.
>Go into woods, learn to live of the land and speak the language of the badgers and elks.
>Forsake all worldly possessions and join a monastery
>>30198394We have way too fucking many. In the beginning I was opposed to quests being on their own board, even ran a few myself, but that was years ago. Now I see that they NEED one.
I wanna be a kight papa!>Go into town and join fighters guild
>>30197004>Enlist in the imperial army
>Go to nearest city, find the cheapest inn, get drunk.
Continue to be a peasant, because if we wanted to join the imperial army, this would be called "Imperial Army Quest."
>>30198459>>30198537We could do monk quest, so long as it's a cool god.
It's always a bad sign then OP can't even spell the name of his own thread.
>>30197004>>Enlist in the imperial army
>>30198459You decided to join a monastery, which one do you prefer?>The northern one, where they teach the Molten Pheonix style>The eastern one, where they teach the Blue Snake style>The southern one, where they teach the Green Fist style>The western one, where they teach the Eternal Strike style
>>30198783Eternal Strike or gtfo
>>30198783None of those. Central one, where they teach the Drunken Monkey style.
>>30198783The western temple sounds best.
>>30198783Which one of these styles have the Hundred Crack Fist?
>>30198783Wait, so all the monks here are the shaolin types, and not actual western-style monks who spend most of their time praying, eating and writing? Meh.Also, how are we supposed to know the difference between these styles? Is it just the name that's difference?
>>30198783Eternal Strike sounds pretty beastly, let's go for that.
>>30198806This. If we're gonna be a lame DnD monk, we might as well be a drunk one.
>>30198871>>30198804>>30198829You decide to travel to the west, how shall you go about getting there?>By ship>By landGoing by land will take longer, but it will be more safe, and going by sea will be quicker but there's always a chance pirates might try plundering your ship.
>>30198922Going by land, time is most likely gonna be irrelevant in this quest anyway.
>>30198473This reflects my general consensus on the state of quests, and by association /tg/ at the moment. This quest has no target audience and likely was not called for to begin with, meaning it's only merit is being a quest, something we have arguably over-saturated the board with. Just because it's a quest doesn't mean that it gets a pass for being spam. I would highly recommend that quests are moderated more tightly in the future.
>>30197125this. sacrifice them and try some demonic shit.
>>30198948All signs point to this quest continuing to be dull as dishwater, anyway. OP will lose interest quickly, so it's not much of a problem.
>Peasant quest>First thing we do is take a level in a player classAll of you should feel bad.
>>30199043Yeah, what's even the point of that? If you make a "Peasent Quest" [sic], make it about being a peasant, and doing peasant stuff. Otherwise, name it Apprentice Quest or something.
>>30199043>>30198997>>30198988>>30198960>>30198948>>30198943>>30198893>>30198871>>30198867>>30198843>>30198829>>30198806>>30198804>>30198770>>30198756>>30198755>>30198728>>30198722>>30198716>>30198674>>30198632>>30198621>>30198537>>30198531>>30198473>>30198459>>30198434>>30198394>>30198381>>30198327>>30198175>>30197125>>30197087>>30197038All of you are faggots, goodbye-Poops McDickbutt
>>30199119Cry us a river. It's your own fault for being so damn bad at running a quest.
>>30199119I like how you even called people who were actually playing along with you faggots. Not very grateful, are we?
>>30199119That was fun.
>>30199140>>30199172>>30199210I had 2000 pages of lore all written out for this world, and all of you blithering imbecils ruined it. I hope your happy /tg/
>>30199249See, the point is that you don't really need tons of deep lore to make a quest, you just need to write a few basic sentences without boring your audience into a coma, as well as come up with a compelling theme. And spell the title right. And you somehow managed to fail at all three, which is impressive.
>>30199606>>30199565>>30199470Like I said, all faggots.
>>30199652You're a faggot.Get out.SO, WHO'S UP FOR ROLLING AN ORK KLAND10Klan or Freeboota?
>>30199743Warhammer 4k is for peasents.
>>30199800Then we're in the right place then aren't we smart guy!
Rolled 10>>30199743Let's roll.
Okay, its not funny anymore. Stop bumping this shit.
>>30199984Alroight ladz.We're Freebootaz!BOOTY AND SHINY BITZ AHOY!Pick a color ya git!D100
Rolled 21>>30200042Oi hopez it's green!
>>30200057>>30200087DED ON YE GIT!Wez iz green! Da most Orky of all da colorz!We gots an Ork wots lejundery. 'Oo was 'e again?D10!
>>30200128>>30200137Dis git is speshul!Wot kinda boy wuz he again?D10!
>>30200186>>30200210OH ROIGHT!He wuz dat Dok dat sawd me leg off, THE GIT!Aw'roight, now what'd 'e do?D100!
>>30200260>>30200283OH YEHHe krumped a bunch of other orks!Roight puny gitz dey were.Now get dat shoota out ya lug 'ole dis is impor'ant!Gork or Mork?D10!
I have no idea what's going on ITT. I think OP tried to run a quest and failed terribly, possibly made it just to troll, then someone decided to make an...orc quest I think.No seriously, I'm confused.
>>30200389>>30200399Awroight!We'z Brutally Cunnin' or wuz it Cunnin'ly Brutal?Ah Zog it!'ow many boyz we got left?D10!
>>30200457We'z Freebootaz mate.We plunder'd diz 'ere thread.>>30200484Why did ya gitz remind me!Gork is da best.Just carnt figa out, which one 'e iz.>>30200498>>30200503Roight! We'z got enough boyz for a plunderin'!See dem gits ova dere? Deyz off limits until I sez so. Got it?!D10!
>>30200603>>30200637See dem pointy'eds?No! not dem emo pointy'eds!Dem sissy ones!See dem gits ova dere? Krump 'em!D100
Rolled 87>>30200657[krumping intensifies]
>>30200674>>30200694IT'S DEM 'OOMIES AGEN!TAKIN' ME SHINY BITZ!ZOGGIN' ROOG TRAYDAS!We got lotsa boyz in our crew, but wot've we got more of dan otha crews?!D10!
Rolled 4>>30200768Is it spirit?
>>30200805No ya git!Itz boyz!MORE FOR THE KRUMPIN'!Wot's da biggest, most aweshum thing we've eva' looted?D100
Rolled 41>>30200890Is it a Space Hulk?
>>30200890One day an Ork is going to loot a D20 that they think can control Fate.And based on the way Orks work, it WILL.They'll literally roll their D20 and it'll determine whose nobz get randomly blown up.
>>30200901"Dunno, ain't looted much, boss""Dunno, ain't looted much, boss"DUNNO.AIN'TLOOTEDMUCH?!YOU TELL ME DAT AGEN YA GIT?!ILL ASK YA AGEN!Wot's da biggest, most aweshum thing we've eva' looted?!D100!
Rolled 84>>30200997Is it a Craftworld?
>>30201051Datz more loik it ya git!We stole some other gitz gargant!Dat zoggin' Dok.Wot did ya do wit it?D10
>poorly run quest thread gets looted by GreenskinsIs there anything Orks can't loot? Can they loot metaphysical, vague concepts, like happiness?
Rolled 9>>30201127Was it a Necron Tombworld?
>>30201148Just watch uz 'oomie.One day wez gonna loot all 'ah Tee Gee!If it wern't fer dose zoggin' 'oomies already in 'ereSeriozly, it musta taken da work of a tacticool geni-CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!
Rolled 20Orcs are shit.
>>30201220YA MADE IT MOAR ORKY!Youz iz da best bunch a gitz I eva bossed about!So, weze iz freebootaz.We'ze green so we'z double orkyDa Lejundary Git is da Dok who Krumped a bunch of other gitz!We'ze got Gork on our side!We'z got a good amount of boyz!We like da point 'edz. deyz got shiny bitz!We hate 'oomies! always nickin' me shiny bitz!We looted a Gargant!An' made it made orky!An' itz in GREEN!TRIPLE ORKY!Now wotz we called?
De uh.. Dakka express boss?
Rolled 50>>30201373Dakka Dakka Dakka.
>>30201437You know, cuz we krump em rite quik
>>30201465>>30201437Youz got somefin 'ereSo, wez goze about deliverin' dakka, planet to planet.An' we got paid in shiny bitz?Loik a, deleevury compenny?
>>30201474No ya git, itz cause we gotta big train dats full a dakkas!
>>30201521Yeh, boss! We's da Dakka Express!
Rolled 19>>30201521Wez deliver da Dakka, or youz dakka back.
>>30201550>>30201544Ah loikz it!Dakka XpressIt iz!Now, wotz we gotz to do wid deez Pointy 'eds anyway?
>>30201588We'z giv em dakka and deys giv us sheshul guns and kroozerz!
>>30201640'An datz more kroozerz for Dakka delivery!'An more speshul shootaz for Delivery of Dakka!Now, whyz deez 'oomie roog traydaz stealin' me shiny bitz?!
>>30201690deyz jelus of our fancy loots from teh pointy headz!
>>30201690Cuz we dah envy of da deleevury sirkut. Oy, we even better den impureal postul surveesh
>>30201743>>30201740Yeh!Deyz iz jelus!Now wot did deez ovva gitz do ta piss off da Dok?
Rolled 32>>30201373ROLL TA SHOOT DA WARBOSS! IZ DA BIGGEST NOW!
Ay uh.. Boss I thinks they just spaced all are squigs boss
>>30201784dey made off wif our loots! pouncey little gits!
>>30201799ROLL TA KRUMP DIZ GIT!>>30201804WOT?!>>30201813AYE DA DOK KRUMPED 'EM GOOD NOW DEY WORK FER US!
I wonder if Butthurt Magee is still around... I hope we make this into the greatest thread imaginable.
Rolled 79>>30201885WOT, GORK!I NEEDZ TO KRUMP DIZ GIT!
Rolled 48>>30201885Rolling teh krump 'im gud!
>>30201911>>30201799HA MY NUMBAHZ DA BIGGEST AND DA BEST.I IZ STILL BOSS, NOW SPACE DIS GIT!
>>30201911I KRUMP DA GIT WITH ME SPIKY BOOTZ! DEY MY SPIKEY BOOTZ 'N NOT ONE A YA GITZ CAN HAVE DEM!
Rolled 65>>30201940Ah, sorry boss...
>>30201990Itz awroight ya git, now, go scrub me Gargant!Wez gotz dakka tah deliver.An' the Dakka Xpress is always on toim!
>>30201940BOSS, WE LOOTIN TADAY? OR WE KRMUPIN GITZ TADAY? BECAUSE ME SPIKEY BOOT WANTS TA KRUMP SUM A DEM 'UMIE GITZ!
GUD NEWZ EVERYWON! Da dok says we got our next deleevury! Where woz it again?
>>30202027WEZ DOIN' WOT WE ALWAYS DO!DELIVERIN' DAKKA!
>>30202090IZ MINE NOW! I SAW IT FIRST! YOU STINKIN GITZ CAN'T 'AVE ANY 'A IT! IZ MINE!
>>30202153Here we see the Loota in its natural habitat, stealing the clan's box. it is a bold move for the loota to steal from the clan, seeing as though he is about the normal size of a regular loota. Here, you can see him posing to strike the nearest ork that comes near him.
OI ! You gitz shut up up there. Iz got work down ere . Hurry up and deleevur da Dakka. Deres a sistum fulla beakies sayin day haven't been krumped in years. And dey gotz lotza shiny gubbins
>>30202090Sector Whoknows VIIIPlanet Whocares IXA planetary governor hears a huge knocking at the door to his palace.'How odd' he thought to himself, not a servant in sight.The knocking came louder, THUNK, THUNK THUNK! It sounded like a tank was banging on the front door! It started to make the metal quiver and buckle, it was going to break the door down!With haste, the governor answered the door....at first he saw green...then he followed it all the way up to see more green...Orky green.Looking down at the governor was a gargantuan Ork, a warboss by the look of him, at his front door, of his palace...with an almost as large package."Uhh...hello." He greeted, almost astonished.>"Iz gotz a package fer ya." The Ork replied in a "matter of fact" tone"I...didn't order anything." The governor said apprehensively, searching for his nearest firearm.>"Itz got yaz name on it, seez! Guvnor Reegal" The green giant pointed at the box with his Power Klaw.What in the name of the throne was this? A warboss delivering a package? what form of lucid dream was this?!"O-okay then." Regal stammered out, in no such luck of finding a fire arm.>"I needz ya to sign diz before ya takez it" The Warboss thrusted a huge clipboard forward, with a tiny pen attached to it.The governor stared at it, then up at him, then back to the clipboard."Th-thats fine." He scribbled a signature down on the clipboard, the Ork quickly took the clipboard away and grabbed the package with two hands."So, what is this...delivery anyway?" He questioned the ork with more confidence.The Warboss tore open the package, a dark shape falling out of it only to be caught by the Ork, green bubble wrap hiding it for a moment until then he saw it...a very, very big shoota.>"Dakka"No one really knows how the Eldar had infiltrated the governors palace that night, but there had been rumours, of a box that was on the front doorstep of the governors palace, that quite crudely had writen on it."Dakka Xpress"
>>30202484This thread is going to be epic
>>30202546All wez need iz wanna dem "drawfags"Iz wanna see a warbozz is a fedex uniform.
>>30202579WHAT'S ABOUT ME BOSS? CAN I GETS SOME A DEM DRAWIN FAGS TA DRAW ME SPIKEY BOOT?!
>>30202579Roight , tiny hat and some shorts
>>30202608AYE!>>30202621'Zactly.Iz wanna you gitz archivin' dis?
>>30202484>Havin ta sign for da dakkaGenioos!
>>30202786Tankz, needz ya make sure yaz got da propa paper work!
>>30202847I az archived it ya gitz!Now all wez needs is ta get a "drawin' fag"
>>30202936Cheerz fer 'elpin' me take over dis shit thread ladz!good noight!