We are using a consensus to make decisions.All rolls must come after the decision and the first roll(s) will be taken.Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=text+adventurePastebin: pastebin.com/inMunfZH Twitter: @MrBonesQuest
>>28987458I am going to be supppper late to the party Bones. But don't go letting us die until I get back!
>>28987458Enjoy the company of a woman in a way which does not involve carnal pleasure.gosh, that sounds weird to consider
>>28987607I do not cater to fucked up fetishes like that.I have some basic fucking common decency.Gonna wait a little for votes and shit though.
>>28987458Cuddle with Sundalia. Possibly even hold her hand.
>>28987607>>28987709So ignore foreboding castle on the sea?
>>28987722It's not on our mission list, it's probably full of monstergirls who will eat us.
>>28987722Nothing good is ever in a foreboding castle.
>>28987722My current priority is getting this geas off ASAP. Not just for our manhood, but because I'm emotionally attached to Sunny and I'm afraid the princess will do something.
Sorry for the delay paint is raping me.
>>28988198Go in and say hi. Keep our defenses up, though.
>>28988198Sneak forward sneakily.
Vote for stealth or friendly defense then.
>>28988379Roll for them. Link to the one you want, highest wins.
Rolled 839>>28988198>2012+1>using Paint>>28988363Stealth
>>28988425Well I guess there's the highest roll.D20 for stealth
>>28988489Now you've rolled 1 3
>>28988489>>28988425What do you recommend instead? All I need is to pop text on an image with no hassle.
>>28988620Flah -> Fire knives?
>>28988778Roll, I'm not going to wait since there aren't many people playing and I don't want this thread having as few updates as the previous ones.
Rolled 2, 4 = 6>>28988793Now I feel pressured.
>>28988837>Roll 3>Roll 2>Roll 4Fucking hell. I'm just going to try and stick our dick in them next.
>>28988837This is two rolls so not counted.>>28988844This one will apply
Rolled 8>>28988837pls no
>>28988861Whoops my bad, yes they are I forgot it was two actions.
Rolled 16>>28988793>>28988861Oh thank goodness my ineptitude saved it.
>>28988889>>28988880I am very sorryI'm notVery sorry indeed.
Rolled 15>>28988901pls no mr bones pls
>>28988901You are the worst benevolent god.
>>28988943In most quests when you win you survive, and when you fail you almost die.Since you get rewarded with lewds on crazy successes, you get to die more often!yaaaaaaaaay
>>28989035OH GODOH GODSTAB AND RUNOH FUCK ME OUR HAND WE NEED HELP
Rolled 7>>28989148Is that two actions or one?
>>28989483Do we still have the slime girls?
>>28989587Use them as meat shields, maybe?
>>28989610This is pretty harsh so I'll wait for any other votes to pop in.
>>28989610uwotm8>>28989483How about we sneak in without the fucking lamp and then gut them
>>28989483Try sneaking again.For Sunny's sake.
>>28989657>uwotm8We're a rogue, a cold-blooded killer. Sending in some four-year-old girls that we've fucked shouldn't be that big a deal.
>>28989690I kill MCs and NPCs like an exterminator kills ants but even I think that was some hardcore shit.Sunny loves little Teepa and the other two are in love.You're a monster but I would totally vote for the same thing.
>>28989719Oh dear how unfortunate.MWAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHA
>>28989752Can we send Lily in to do it instead?
>>28989719>>28989752I said we should use the slime girls as meat shields. If we'd done that, then this 1 would've lead to Teepa getting killed. Instead, Jack is about to be exsanguinated by some spidergirls.>>28989791Lily has no combat abilities and is currently under the influence of a charm spell, that's too far.
We are the worst thief.
>>28989719God fucking dammit, OP.
I take a min to see what's going on in here and all this terribleness.Jesus Christ
>>28989816>Use your girlfriends favourite slime child as a meat shield.Totally fine, let's go dammit.>Impotence through Lily deathUNACCEPTABLE. THAT'S TOO FAR.
>>28990245Roll escape artist.
>>28990245Can we... do flaming knives?
>>28990371Yep.Roll and link to the action you want.
>>28990245It's more that bringing the slimes along would increase our survivability and only *maybe* get them killed (and if it did, it probably would've killed us if we hadn't), whereas sending Lily in there would basically be signing her death warrant.
>>28990578I think you need to stop.
>>28990587Flaming knives wins. One more roll.
Rolled 15>>28990603I don't believe in luck.
>>28990623Damn the dice gods hate you guys tonight
>>28990803Try to prepare a trap. If we have anything that can sustain it's flame after it's been thrown, we should make one, then hide in the shadows. When the spider creature comes to inspect it, we jump at it and use the flaming hands thing on its face or some vital area.
>>28990803Keep going. We can't see anything, we don't have anything on us. If we run into the spidergirl, use blowtorch hands or flaming knives, depending on range.
>>28990803I have been waiting ALL WEEK for this thread, checking back every day, but when it finally turns up we are DYING REPEATEDLY AND MISERABLY.What the fuck guys?
>>28988198Was rereading this scene.>supine neckwut
>>28990973taking this because the other one isn't feasible.>>28990993You can safely assume that outside of holidays I don't really do Monday-Wednesday nights. Keep an eye on the twitter, I never start without warning first.>>28991063Weird that was meant to be serpentine, or maybe sublime. I don't remember.
>>28990973I need two rolls.One for You don't get to know and one for the flaming knives/ blowtorch.
Rolled 6>>28991118Dice gods still a shit.
>>28991135Oh yes they are.And one more
Rolled 19>>28991118Dice gods the ultimate shit.
>>28991158Thank you Based God
>>28991118Betting now:>>28991135Detect who it is (because first there's a slime girl come to help us).>>28991158Hit whoever you try to hit with flame knives/blowtorch hand. If you detect, get the spidergirl after slimegirl shows up. If you don't...RIP, Teepa.
>>28991267Didn't get enough support to bring her
>>28991415Yell for help, turn and use flaming knives.
>>28991415Spartan throw our spear like a boss
>>28991452>>28991482Need more votes. If they don't come in two minutes please link and roll.
>>28991415Throw the spear, how well doesn't really matter we just need to prevent another shot and get her to evade.Follow up with bangnet. Incapacitate and see if she can remove the charm from princess
>>28991482>>28991511Need a roll for spear throw and a roll for bangnet
>>28991482I'll back this. Save magic for when closer
Rolled 19>>28991535Dice gods aren't real.
Rolled 18>>28991535I don't need no dice gods
>>28991905What time of day is it now?
>>28991905" Don't we have places to be?"The smut must end sometime, bones!
>>28992011>>28992007Just after midday. You are walking on sparse grassland.>>28992011Felt appropriate since Yirda is mad, trying to prove herself and you just killed a metric fuckton of spider ladies.Waiting on more votes for a couple more minutes.
>>28991905Reject Yirda with some pithy joke.
>>28992011>>28992121Good enough for me.
>>28992084Well, the group may want lunch. Now seems fine.
>>28992313>"Oh yeah, definitely. I wasn't going to say anything, but I'm glad you can fix it," Lily agrees.Best girl confirmed.Imm, obviously.
>>28992313Imm the Loli of course>>28992408>Best girl confirmedBut that was confirmed as Sundalia threads ago
>>28992466Lily is the best girl. All her erratic behavior is attributable to being under the effects of a charm spell, which means she actually has no personality flaws.
>>28992767Ask Lily to step aside and then walk with the little lol kitsuni to the back or whatever and tell her that lily was charmed by a Medusa to be a yandere
>>28992767"A member of our party is cursed, and I want her fixed. While it would be possible, perhaps even convenient to me to allow her to persist in this state, my noble heart bleeds to see her so twisted up inside. Please, cure her of her affliction!"
>>28992767"Well, I got this friend *point to Lily where Lily can't see she is being pointed at.* who has come under a most distressing charm and came in hope that you could remove it."
>>28992926Changing from >>28992911to >>28992926
>>28992926>>28992926Two for this.
do you want your fortune told?
>>28993009Depends. Do we have to pay for it? If so, we're the sort of man who doesn't believe in destiny. If not, then sure.
>>28993033It's free but ____________________
>>28993009Only if it's free.
>>28993106"What's the chance of us fucking after this? "
>>28993106"How many days until I die or suffer injury sufficient to permanently remove me from the adventuring life?"
>>28993150Let me correct that to:>How many days until I die or am imprisoned or incapacitated for a period of more than one year or suffer injury sufficient to permanently remove me from the adventuring life?
>>28993106"How does this quest I am currently on seem most likely to end?"
>>28993106"How many more women will I have sex with in my life?"
I'm exhausted. gonna have to leave and archive.Go ahead and ask questions, follow on twitter, vote on the archive etc. So tired suddenly. Bye Boners!
>>28993565Alright, so we're basically immortal and invulnerable for the next thirty-four days, then we have to have the princess lock us up for at least a year. Have fun.
>>28993610Actually, it's ambiguous.MR BONES PLEASE DO NOT READ MR BONES.We could have the princess lock us up, planning on doing it for a year, then after a day point out the ambiguity in the question and argue that, logically, the prediction has already come true, since "for more than one year" does not NECESSARILY apply to "am imprisoned."