The first reply with an even ending postcount makes the decision, or the third with an odd postcount if you are getting unlucky.You may need to roll and will be notified when this is necessary.Previous thread: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/Twitter: @tgtextadventure to be notified of a new thread, and have questions answered.
>>26819948Enter the cave, keep a couple skellys in front of you to activate traps
>>26819948Make a bone 10ft pole, and go in tapping the fuck out of everything
>>26819977>tap the fuck out of everythingWe did that in the last thread too.
>30 well dressed skeletonsSkeleton orgy
>>26819948Make a pole, give them to skeletons, double protection.
>>26819987Let's not start like this again. The last thread got pretty waylaid.
>>26820012send a skeleton to trip it
>>26820012Hook it with our trapsticks and see what happens
>>26820012Try to figure out what the wire connects to, without setting the trap off.
>>26820012Can't we just walk a fair bit away and then telekinesis the wire?
>>26820012Just step over it
>>26820048>>26820059It's already an even number.
>>26820065Send a skeleton to step over the tripwire without tripping it.
>>26820065Use telekinesis to set it off from afar.
>>26820101...make the cow skeleton crawl out of the cow while it's still alive
>>26820134There goes any hope at Lawful Good alignment.
>>26820134Continue along, letting the skeletons ride the cow.
>>26820140Oh, no. THAT's what did it. The cattle mutilation.Let's just completely ignore the fact that the first even post or 3rd odd post makes it impossible to be anything other than chaotic.
>>26820134>The skeletons look impressed.That did it. Sprayed water out of my nose. Just a second, I need to find a towel now.
>>26820164Send a skeleton into the room to the other side.
>>26820164Push a skeleton in
>>26820164Send a loyal skellington
Sorry about slow replies, my internet is dicking with me so I have to keep reloading the thread.
>>26820208Send another skeleton in the room, but this time go through the gaps the walls left.RIP
>>26820265Tell him to jump up once
>>26820265Send another skeleton through the middle
>>26820265Waltz right to the other end of the corridor
>>26820280Leave all our horny plant girls to the mayor in our will. He probably doesn't deserve them, but fuck, no one else does either.
>>26820318Oh. So the Jest is even more batshit that we thought. Cowdroppers? Pillowcrushers? What's next? A moat of hot fudge with marshmallow alligators in it?
>>26820318Find a nice part of the fold to put your penis in, hoping to inseminate your surroundings in a vain attempt to start an instant squishy golem army.
>>26820324This is what happens when you stay up until 6am writing fapfics for /tg/
>>26820350Can we reanimate the crushed skeleton? Otherwise, toss something on our person into the gap and see if we can somehow get all the skeletons in the middle.
>>26820350Yell loud enough for your skeletons to hear you say, 'START HAVING A SKELETON ORGY!'
>>26820350Telekinesis to push down on the spot where the unlucky other skeleton stood when the walls reopened (closed?) so that we can get them to open back up and call the rest of the skeletons through
>>26820350Shit in your hand and throw it on the trap trigger, while it resets walk across to the other side of the room without a problem
>>26820350Are ther any doors / other openings in this room? If so, go through them
>>26820350Snort the crushed remains of your skeleton minion in an attempt to gain his skeleton powers.
>>26820350try to calm the skeletons down a bit
>>26820424Arm yourself with a large bone. Get on the cow skeleton to make yourself seem bigger. Violently masturbate with one hand, while making eye contact with the dog. This will assert our dominance.
>>26820424Give it the d, no, the cow. Give it the cow skeleton.And then animate its skeleton right out of its body while it's distracted.
Rolled 9>>26820507Are we about to spawn a race of furries? Gross...
>>26820529no we are going to die
Rolled 2>>26820507Oh Boy.
>>26820554SKELETONS! HEED MY CALL IN NEED AND SLAY THIS FOUL BEAST!
>>26820554Command our loyal gentkeletons to attack the beast using the two crushed skeletons remains. Preferably sharpened and or heavy.
>>26820554Order skeletons to stab her in the dog-cuntWith their swords and weapons, of course.And then we can finish it.
>>26820554THE COW MUST NOW FULFIL ITS DUTY.Animate the cow skeleton to force-feed itself to the dog.
>>26820582It can only end poorly...
>>26820638Raise the skeledog.Send some skeletons to the hole.
>>26820638Release the trapped whatever it is. Or rather, make a skeleton do it.
>>26820684Order her to eat her puppies
>>26820684Send the skeledog and her pups home if possible. She'd make a great guard dog. If not, then just stick around and keep her in case we need more bone muscle.Onward through the dungeon!
>>26820792Have you considered trying minor consensus Mr Bones?
>>26820792x pedestalx objects
>>26820792Shit. . .have we been disembowled?Have the skeletons bring us whatever's on those pedestals, and others to start feeling around.
>>26820800I find this way is fairer and give everyone a chance to make a decision, whatever it may be. The number of players changes throughout a thread, so I worry minor consensus would be a little subjective.
>>26820862Are those... Are those our testicles?
>>26820901>Stomach painnope. I was thinking gallbladder and something else, but it doesn't seem to fit.>>26820862Erm, for lack of better idea's, have a skeleton jam the clock with it's fingers.
>>26820952I'm guessing we have been poisoned somehow and these globes are the antidote. We take a risk and eat one of the globes, after smelling them first.
>>26820952Panic mode.Get half our skeletons to grabt a pedestal and start ramming that shit.Use the rest to start hacking at the wall around and gronud under it.Use telekensis to try to rip it down.
>>26820952Smash down the walls using a pedestal and scout for a way out.
>>26821071Is that our asshole? On the pedestal? We try to force it back in with our hands.
>>26821071>we got ripped open a new one>literallyWe need to stop fucking around and solve this shit>"Figure out the game that kills you dead">"To get a baked reward instead">23 pedestals (24 hours?)>Each revolution tears out a piece of usLet's do an experiment. Get some puppies. Put a live one on a pedesat. A dead one on another. And a random skull on a third. And keep hacking away at the walls and door.
>>26821129This.And bust open the clock with a pedestal.
I need an even postcount fellas, just reroll if it doesnt happen. In the mean time I'm taking: >>26821129
>>26821212Stand on the fourth pedestal, and wait for the next chime
Are we playing Saw, for a reward of cake?.... Is the Jester some kind of deranged magic fusion of Jigsaw and GLaDOS?
>>26821287Far as I can tell, we are losing an organ every time the timer goes down. Do we just... say that or something?
>>26821283SHOUTWE ARE LOSING ORGANS ALPHABETICALLYADRENAL GLANDS, ANUS, APPENDIX? BLADDER ETC
>>26821357Eat the cupcakeFuck it, even if it's a trap, we're gona die of internal bleeding in a few hours anyway
>>26821357This >>26821385fuck it
>>26821357Feed it to a skelebro
This lag is driving me fucking insane. It looks like not many are playing too. Mind if I get a headcount? See if it's worth carrying on?
>>26821477here, this is a good thread
>>26821477lurking not playing. This is great!
>>26821477Im kind of in and out. Maybe you should try at peak time?
>>26821493>>26821502>>26821507I might drop out for good. If that happens, follow @tgtextadventure if you want to know when the game picks up again.
Also suggestion time motherfuckers
>>26821477Chiming in sometimes.
>>26821577Walk through the door, look around the room
>>26821691examine the book closelydon't pick it up yet
>>26821691It's obviously explosive runes.Have a skeleton pick it up and inspect/open it.
>>26821763gonna take the first suggestion now to speed things up a little.
>>26821809we follow the hair, to see where it goes>>26821502Dude, start playing, we need more people
>>26821900Have a skeleton carefully hold the hair in place with one hand while moving the book with the other. Stand well back.
>>26821976Look in the book, maybe there's something in there that can help you. Failing that, run like fuck for the exit.
>>26821976That ain't what I said, mack.>>26821934>Have a skeleton carefully hold the hair in place with one hand while moving the book with the other.What the skeleton is doing.>Stand well back.What we should have been doing.
>>26821976Don't we have healing magic?Fucking heal ourselves. A lot. Like we should have been doing since things started chopping our organs out?
>>26822049The dart whistled straight, you didn't take any precaution against the projectile. Standing further back didn't help much.>>26822029
>>26822078Very basic flesh knitting, but no actual healing magic.Mr Bones is a Necromancer. You lose positive energy control, you only have the basic power to manipulate flesh as needed in constructs. Enough to close a wound, but not much more.
>>26822100Well, let's skip all the little details and solve the most major problem, then.Become Immortal.
>>26822100... A spell for any occasion, but also potentially one which can draw enough power to, say, kill us?... What about designing a spell which can produce more magical energy than it consumes, has varying output as we require (so it won't go supercritical and explode) and can also be bound into an artifact or construct of some sort? Like a magical generator we can power other spells off of? I mean, is that even a thing which makes sense under the laws of magical physics in this world?
>>26822138Note the "Don't make a spell you can't handle" warning. *Do not do this*.
>>26822100Also, uh, shouldn't we get ourselves an antidote for whatever we got dosed with *before* we go play with the book?
>>26822138woah, WOAH. What if its a book of djinn or something? Something that's utterly malicious, but has to grant wishes?
>>26822100I've got one question here.It says there are two uses remaining.Do we create a spell and learn it or does the book cast the spell?Speak: Can we create 2 different spells and recast them after learnint, or can we just cast two spells with that book?
>>26822255It reads as if it's 2 uses of "create a spell". But good point.
>>26822158The only short term suggestion
>>26822255Create two permanent spells, which can then be learnt and used without the book as normal.
>>26822294Seek the taverns/slums and such for useful allied against the alliance. And while we are at it listen arround for some other way of entering that city unnoticed
>>26822294Let's see how the puppies are doing. Make sure Elyria gets them...whatever it is puppies eat regularly, and that they're kept healthy.Then it's back to adventuring.
>>26822294Dig up information on the jester.
can someone fill me in on the 'Alliance'? I couldnt be fucked to read the last thread
>>26822407Something like an empire of the eternal smiles. Heavily against necromancers. I'll try to find the 2-3 snippets involving them.
>>26822407Completely retarded bureaucracy with a side order of Ministry of Happiness
>>26822407>>26822425 here1. http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/images/1377402272131.png2. http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/images/1377402578592.png3. http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/images/1377402909271.png
>>26822451No time to deal with it now.Back to questing. Make that fucking clown pay.
>>26822451Ask the mayor how he feels about them. If hes on our side, beat the bureaucratic empire with thoir own weapons. Get us in with correctly filled forms to send us as diplomats.
>>26822451Let's try making a big ass skeleton golem again.Surely, we won't fail twice.
>>26822555Set up some skelly guards in the town square and wait for our centaur buddies to arrive, then ask them what the hell they are doing.
>>26822555Are they trying to visit the brothel?Godammnit.
>>26822697"Palla, um, you have not in fact been coming *to* the brothel, you've just been charging through the square. Look, the brothel is over there. And maybe arrive a little slower next time? You've kind of been injuring people in your hurry to arrive, humans are a lot squishier than centaurs."
>>26822697Uh, em. Can we divide them into groups and space out their visits? And give them a discount maybe?
>>26822697>femalesOh Jesus. Whoever suggested they visit our brothel is an idiot. >>26822733This. Also, go to the local bar and say you need a lot of men to fuck centaurs. Diplomance that shit.
>>26822738I retract my statement, these two combined are much better>>26822733>>26822745
>>26822745As the person who posted >>26822733, I support this extension of my suggestion.
>>26822745>Also, go to the local bar and say you need a lot of men to fuck centaurs. Diplomance that shit.All of my sides! It's more like "Hey, centaur pussy out there needs poundin. Get to it!
>>26822697"Slow the fuck down! You realize this is a human settlement correct? At least try to give warning before you run down the townsfolk."
>>26822745>>26822753>>26822763This level of cooperation has been fantastic. Well done, /tg/.
>>26822847Nope. We got clown fucks to murder.
>>26822847"Well golly, miss. Would you like to see my private garden? The flower girls are blooming very nicely this time of year."
Back to evens by the way since we got more players, or the third odd ending postcount.
>>26822875Same person. Perhaps be a bit more tactful. Tell her that I'm flattered by the offer, but more pressing matters need dealing with. She's welcome to anyone in the brothel.
>>26822875dont be such a spoilsport
>>26822875I swear if that fucker so much as HONKS even once we will beat himself to death with his own pelvis.
>>26822847I still have too much revenge on the mind.
>>26822890Oh thank fuck.>>26822847Yes. Yes, we would be most happy to assist her. (Although we can''t spend all thread in OP's magical realm again, we do also have jesters to murder.)
>>26822894Kill bastard now. Fun times later.
>>26822899You know, I'm as angry as the next guy, but it doesn't take very long to do the horizontal monster mash.
>>26822926How do you even get it on with a centaur? Blowjobs are fine but aren't the other parts a little high up? Also only one position is pretty boring.Nah, I'd rather continue questing until we find something that is more...humanoid.Or we could haterape the Jester.
Rolled 3>>26822971Give in.No use in arguing with a centaur in heat
Rolled 14>>26822971Skeletons get her the hell away from me!
Rolled 10>>26822971For fuck's sake, *fuck her*. Hard. Possibly with your fist (since centaur pussy is going to be pretty big).
>>26822971Ok, I was all for banging the centaur, but I'm not one for being taken against my will. Can we hold her with shadows until we drag a few guys in here?
>>26822971>A female centaur in heat. >Thinking logically and unselfishly.Pick one only.
Rolled 11>>26822988aaaaagh no dammit peoplejust take the sex.
>>26822985Damn it all.
>>26822972The jester's a girl
>>26822971Hold her down with either skeletons or magic. Then get a guy or 2 to help her...
>>26823029You need to put a 1 in front of the d20 part.
>>26823017Too angry to care. It could be a goddamn sex goddess, I'm still going for blood.
Rolled 2>>26823017We get one more usable orifice, not that big of a difference.
Rolled 12>>26823029>>26823040Thank you, new to this.
>>26823041.... Yeah, but if she's a girl, the haterape becomes much more sexy and prolonged. And maybe we use our mind control spells to keep her as our permanent sex slave, to hatefuck her over and over.
>>26823066Just get over with it.
>>26823066You should probably roll another D20 depending on what you are doing.
Rolled 9>>26823066This is obviously not working. New strategy: fuck her into submission. Fuck her until she can't stand (with the help of your employees and plant girls and so on).
Rolled 1>>26823066Just do it.>>26823091I know I don't need to but I'm rolling for sex anyway. This seems kind of silly.
Rolled 3>>26823066Magically chain her (living shadow?), then fuck her.
Rolled 5>>26823066We've got shadow magic, right? Can we give her some nice thick horsecocks and/or tentacles to pleasure her with?
>>26819948Put quest in your fucking subject line dear fucking gosh.
>>26823066Yell out to any available guys left in the brothel."Whoever wants the hot, horny female leader, she's outside, first come (heh), first served!"
>>26823066I enter OPs magical realmAgain
Rolled 2>>26823112>1... this is going to end badly.
>>26823112I am so sorry.
Rolled 15>>26823123Let's have a roll for that.
>>26823122((Also, Mr Bones, you should probably do this. It's totally a quest. An awesome, wonderful, incredibly hot quest, but a quest nonetheless.))
OP is taking so long because he's writing us back into his magical realm. Guarantee it.
>>26823235I fucking told you.Should've just gone for blood.
QUEST ON BREAK.I NEED FOOD.Will be back in maybe an hour, Until then feel free to catch up with: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/And twitter for when I restart: @tgtextadventure>>26823260That would not have happened without a critfail. You guys and your dice.
>>26823234We never left
I will add quest too next time.Sorry I've never done a successful multi-part, it has always been one-shots with maybe a failure of a second thread.
>>26823235>Every housewife in town is suddenly wondering why their husband has broken ribs
>>26823278/tg/ is slow enough that this thread will last an hour even without any bumps.And I don't know what the hell is up with our dice. This is approaching Papa-N levels of HUEHUEHUE
>>26823235This is fine. We have healing magic. If not our own, then our dryad friend has some, she already regrew our kidneys.Totally worth it.Now, let's go find that Jester fucker, mind-control him, and make him into our permanent slave. That seems like good payback.
>>26823291I think 7-12 threads is the ideal for quirky mini-adventures like this one. Long enough that there's a sense of progress, but short enough that neither QM or audience gets burned out. Just roll with it until you don't feel like writing any more. Also, somebody archived this thread as well, and the first got up to +10 on the archives so it can't be all bad.
bumpnot really necessary but still
New thread here: >>26824098
>>26822745Mfw I suggested it as a joke, not realizing they were mostly women