First even ending postcount makes the decision, or the third odd ending postcount if none come up.Anything goes.No really. Anything.
Dark Mage, or if that isn't available, Necromancer
>>26809272go to the Eastern town.
>>26809272Head to one of the smaller towns. The army of darkness must grow
>>26809272Raise the closest skeleton to aid your quest, and call it George whatever it is
Dig in the ground, look for corpses.
>>26809370Make more. Call the next one Jimbo.
>>26809392Not just people either. raise everything, squirrels cows even elves
>>26809450examine our possessions
>>26809450Make the weaker carry you and the stronger open the path as you move closer to one of the towns around the big Eastern one
>>26809450Go east and surround the town.
>>26809450Go to the tavern and buy drink for all.Pay with some gold coins from the cave.Proclaim ourselves swords for hire.
>>26809450Look for one of the smaller towns to coqnuer.
>>26809480>the skelecorpse corps.
>>26809480This, and call yourself Mr. Bones
>>26809272Make a paper crane with your irrelevant maps. They have outlived their purpose.
>>26809545Proclaim you only wanted to attract them and that you can use your necromancy to revive their crops when they die
>>26809545Three words, people. Bitches and booze.
>>26809545Order your skeletons to break out into dance and sing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XTgFtxHhCQ0
So, this makes me wonder. What exactly do Necromancers do for fun?
>>26809662See what John has to offer.
>>26809670Zero ain't even.Ask what the job is. But spend the night in good ol' debauchery
>>26809687It is but he wasn't making a suggestion, so it's up for grabs.
>>26809662Let's talk to John.
>>26809790Talk money. And corpses.We may need more to overcome what waits ahead.
>>26809790Accept the offer. Also can we consult our spells? It would be nice to know what we can do besides raising skeletons.
>>26809790Investigate the creatures, but assume it's just the farmers trying to hide more crops for themselves.
>>26809790Offer the use of some of our skeletons as scarecrows/bodygaurds.
>>26809892Walk around town and outlying farms to check surrounding areas.Set skeletons to patrol during night
>>26809892Promise him you'll help under the condition you get to take 5 of the village's kids to make your apprentices.
>>26809969Give george personality to overwatch the skeletons
>>26809969I assume the skeleton is casting spells. In which case.Mind controlOn the main character.
>>26809969We should use Shadow Meld in order to ambush the troublemaker.
>>26810011This >>26809984 and do the same to Skull Mace, and make sure both of them obey you and you only
Feel free to reroll your suggestions. I am doing this the fairest way I could devise, since these often devolve into complaints about the suggestion taken.
>>26810011>Hello, dear farmers! Do you know, where the ne'er-do-well who did this terrible things is hiding?
>>26810011Skeleton sentries.Set up a messenger and warning system.Go back to town and figure out ways to arm them proper.
>>26810011Were the peasants going to equip us?
>>26810011Implent sneaky personalities on some of the skeletons and make them wait in ambush.
>>26810090Tell him to follow, head to the fields immediately. Bring more skeletons with you.
>>26810090Let's go outside and see what's happened.
>>26810090Start running. To farm. Now.Try to give personality "can speak english" to messenger.
>>26810153Follow the damn thing.
>>26810153lolfuckingwatAlright. I think we should raise a raven so it can scout for us.
>>26810153Damnit, it's druids or something. Gather our skeletons and head into the forest if it's day. Otherwise, wait until it's day.
>>26810260Give our skeletons some torches, it's time to go for the kill. Enter the forest, but try not to start any forest fires, we'd probably burn the village down with it.
>>26810260can we mind control one of them?
>>26810260Take your skeletons and willing paesants to lead an assault against the Dryads.
>>26810260Burn them all.
>>26810260Tell the villagers the threat has been identified. Take the Skeletoncorpse corps. company, and any willing villagers into the forest to cut(and/or rape) down some fucking dyrads
>>268102973rd Odd ending postcount.
>>26810373Ask dyrads to clarify of the children part.
>>26810373No.Burn forrest surrounding farm, tell them to fuck of or their dead
>>26810373Ask what it'll take to keep them away from the farm and crops
>>26810373Offer to help in exchange for a reward we can decide on
>>26810373First, this >>26810373if answer is unsatisfactory, then Burnination must commence.
>>26810373spurn her advances, cut the heads off the chiddrens
>>26810373Demand 10 of their girls as tribute, kill them and turn them into zombies right away. Give them a seductive personality so you can use them to assasinate targets.
>>26810373Feign acceptance, then use illusion to make a false us and teleport away. Command the skellies to destroy.
>>26810458They're food, ladies. People need to eat, y'know. Just kill em all.
>>26810373What children and why did headless have a plough? dont tell me he upset the locals
>>26810458Ask them if they are willing to pay more then the village.
>>26810458Unleash skeletal hell upon them.
>>26810458Determine the rewards, if it is greater than the villagers, work with them. If not, destroy them.
>>26810458Kill them using misdirection and illusions. Maybe illusion of ourselves.
>>26810517Get paid. Take up missed oportunity on village girls.Time for a new job and better equipment.
>>26810517>The wheat limp back to the farms limply.Why hello 2AM brain, nice to see you again.
>>26810503maybe use skellyravens carrying torches made to look like normal ravens trough the use of illusions
>>26810534>get paid. get laid. get weapons.Me likey
>>26810517Raise defeated enemies as sexy, sassy assassins
>>26810517Make sure the dryads are all completely genocided. No repeats of this shenanigans
>>26810517Return to the village for your reward, and raise Dryads as your vassals
>>26810517Go to town and demand your reward, if its not enough threathen to massacre the whole village.
>>26810517Make sure all the dryads are killed. I don't think we'll be able to raise them as our dead. Weird tree spirits don't work that way.Go get paid. Rob wheat of sentience. There is no need for them to be aware. Burn forest.
>>26810609Move to a different town?
>>26810609Time to go to a bigger city to get better equipment. Should probably leave the skeletons outside though.
>>26810609Go back and raise those dryads, could be useful.Look for higher work unless the villagers need something else.
>>26810609Burn the forest to the ground to make sure the dryads are gone for good.
>>26810609Did we just get kinkier than BFQ ever did? Wowzers.Anyway, kill the bitches, get 5 more skeletons.
>>26810609>dat scene>based OP
>>26810609Go back to raise the dryads. Burn the forest.
Dare I ask but, do we have a name?
>>26810609Kill the girls and make leather robes from their hides
>>26810653I don't think we do yet. I vote for Phil.
>>26810692>Phil the necromancerHmm, maybe. How about something alliterable.Ned's, unless that's too cliche
>>26810719How about Ed?
>>26810719I vote for Mr. Bones
Official Name VoteReply to this with 1, 2 or 31. Mr Bones2. Phil3. Ed
>>26810743Find a job.Later ressurect the dryads
>>26810743Go back and raise some dryad bitches. Use em to scour for work.
>>26810743Well that sucked. Guess we need to find more work. Ask around in the tavern? Or how about the church, hehehe.
>>26810743Raise Dryads as servants and find some work
>>26810743Go to the city cemetery hang out
>>268107592. Philhaypil>>26810743Find a party of adventurers.
>>26810743Try to rob a bank using mind control, if you succeed use to money to infeltrate the city's thieves guild.
>>26810759Just to reassure my opinion, I vote 1
3 votes for one, Mr Bones it is.
>>26810849Accept, and then look for dead animals to animate
>>26810849Done deal.Also dryad servants, before they start to decompose.
>>26810849I'll take it. George and Jimbo and Bonemace got this. Headless can hold the rear.
>>26810849Accept deal and find the cemetery to raise more corpses.
>>26810849How strong is our telekinesis? Is it a field, or a single object type thing?
>>26810849Let's go murder some banditos
>>26810959"You"Offer her a choice, come willingly and serve under her terms, or die and serve in death alongside her sisters anyway.Then, it's off to the convoy
>>26810906You can exert individual, focused control on one object, in a small area, or large powerful, but unfocused waves.e.g.Puling a crow and stripping its fleshORSending out a psychic wave, dropping a whole flock with a push.You exert enough broad force to knock back several people, or toss one around like a ragdoll.
>>26810959Rape/Kill/Raise.In that order please, no shenanigans.
>>26810959Use illusion to disguise self and then... I dunnoOr create a dark magic shield in front of you or whatever
>>26810976Ah, I assume things like projecting an area of outward force around ourselves to protect from arrows or things like that is not something we are able to accomplish?
>>26810959Use Telekinesis then Dark Shroud.
>>26811049Find the cemetery to raise more corpses, or continue on the job to guard merchandise
>>26811019Grab one arrow from the air? Sure.A wave stopping a shitton of arrows, absolutely not. their momentum and shape slice straight through. It'll slow them down, but it wont stop them enough to matter.
>>26811049Raise more skellingtons.
At some point in the future we should make the dark-haired girl our apprentice / cockslave.
>>26811127To battle! And start mindfucking/force throwing bandits all over.
>>26811127Kill them all. Raise the ones we kill.
>>26811127THREATEN WITH MY DARK MAGICAlso, what's the name of the Dryad?
>>26811127Dark Energy. Fill the place with unholy darkness.
>>26811127Send the skeletons to the battle while protecting self iwth a shield made out of Dark Energy. Then, shroud self in shadows and start casting death all around while teleporting
>>26811234Go back and raise at least two banditos.Ask them who'se their leader. Get the big one too.Also moar weapons
>>26811234Return to raise the bandits and take their weapons and goods. Continue searching for quests.
>>26811234>what do you do?Try to figure out why I was too stupid to raise the bandits as skeletons to replace my losses.
>>26811234>You break one, who immediately balls up into the rock you made him think he is
>>26811252Does it even work like that? I thought it wasn't possible to actually bring back the dead, at least with what we have.
>>26811291You'll never know until you try.If anything, the big fella might have a big skelly under him all else failing.
Can we roll for some of this or something OP? It sorta feels like we are a force of nature that has no weakness and can't be stopped as it is...
>>26811049>"You return to the city a couple hours before the wagon sets off.>"Oh god, dryad girl is the narrator.
>>26811341You studied for ten years in a powerful art, and all you have to do so far is stop some basic bandits, and kill some stupid girls.I'm not surprised it's so easy. Rolls will come when it isn't a wash.
>>26811341This>>26811385Use create contructs to turn Skull Mace into a bone golem made out of punier skeletons
>>26811341Calm down and enjoy the ride man.
>>26811385I was gonna suggest asking who's gonna pay for us to stop the abduction's, but >>26811404
Rolled 1>>26811456Can we make him have four legs? It seems like having him also function as a pack mule would be a good idea.
Rolled 6>>26811480Oh god.
Rolled 17>>26811456Make him have six arms
>>26811480I eagerly await the result of this roll.
Rolled 7Maybe inbue upon on creation, a degree of natural regeneration abilities, so he can be sent off to do stuff without us having to come after him to fix him up
>>26811512OP has taken 0 as even before, so no escape from that roll.
>Faggots call to roll for shit we should know how to do easily>Instant critfail
>>268115121, 3, 5, 7, 92, 4, 6, 8There would be an odd biasis without 0 being even, and some pointless posts that count for nothing.
>>26811534>/tg/ diceDid you expect anything else?
>>26811534Constructing greater minions is not easy shit. I planned for rolling for such things from the start.It is nonetheless, a terribly happy coincidence.
>>26811530Salvage what you can.The abductions are off for now.Get dryad and rest to bring food, water, and have her give "other comforts" till you can regain energy and magic.
>>26811530Fuck it, time to laze about until we can do magic again.
>>26811530Ah dammit, look for an unguarded grave to raise more corpses?
>>26811552We're too weak.Going for >>26811549>>26811551
>>26811530What >>26811549 said
>>26811549Oh shit I forgot about the dryad, damnit she's gonna kill us now.
Rolled 16>>26811530Go see if we can get that dark haired girl to join us in our tower as our apprentice or lover.
>>26811579Hide in our tower until we're better, watch out for the dryad coming back to kill us.
>>26811579Welp, then this again>Get dryad and rest to bring food, water
>>26811579Mourn George, Jimbo, Headless and Mace. Have Dyrad give you blowjob to help you recover emotionally for the next 2 weeks.
We really should look into Lichdom at some point
>>26811613After the fuck up we did?We ought to go to wizard school or something. This was a rookie mistake.
>>26811601He was a skeleton after all.
>>26811618I agree. Then we can have wacky misadventures!And seduce hot coeds!
>>26811579I don't think we should risk ruining our chances with the Dryad at this point, we'll need her help and magic if we want to recover our energy
>>26811646Don't ever mention the killing it again.Build up our energy, raise some skeletons, mourn the loss of your first batch and always remember this fucking day. Hell, keep georges skull on a belt to never forget.Ask around who wants us to investigate the abductions and who's willing to pay
>>26811646Demand blowjob from dyrad. I need sexual healing.
>>26811646Sit around for a week and rub our nuts
>>26811646I don't know guys, I'm more interested in training and getting the Dryad to become our badass partner in battle, rather than a mere fuck-buddy
>>26811699I'm more interested in getting rid of her. Some day she's gonna find out we killed all her friends and she'll hunt us down. Should just get one of the girls from the village if you want a fuckbuddy.
>>26811699The way i see it. This dryad is going to be a temporary ally until she inevitably learns about our killing her sisters. If she becomes a badass warrior then she will betray us when we are at our weakest, like now.
>>26811646try and get the dryad into necromancy, it's technically life magic if you think about it, you bring dead things back to life albeit not as they were before they died.
>>26811699Who says we can't have both?A necromancer and a . . .whatever you call a plant/life wizard. An excellent combination.
>>26811751Accept everything for certain, but the marriage (though don't deny it either). Can't be settling down in our prime nor marrying someone we've never met before either. Ask to be let into the graves.We're off on another adventure!
>>26811751do this >>26811748I feel i posted it a little late, so I'll try my luck
>>26811752Life and death magic... I like it
>>26811764Polygamy probably isn't illegal in this setting.
>>26811769I was hoping for something that ends in mancy, but ok.A druid and a necromancer. Life and death. Think of the possibilities.
>>26811793Then how about calling it Naturamancy?
>>26811816Animancy would be far more appropriate
>>26811778It is. This isn't a fetish quest.I write scenes I like, when they come up and I'm pretty vanilla besides some light monstergirl action.It's mainly a regular quest, I just like the total freedom of choice I can provide.
>>26811826Do we have any skeletons still animated, or did we use them all on the "upgrades" to skull mace? We're gonna need to go out and do this anyway now that we've accepted it.
>>268118588 Left, one is carrying the plough with a legless Skull-Mace on it. All the named skeletons other than him are dead.
>>26811882Welp, this is gonna suck. Gotta go and try to track her down anyway. Is there a forest nearby or something where the kidnappers could hide?
>>26811858> We're gonna need to go out and do this anyway now that we've accepted it.Agreed. Better to die a necromancer in glory, than live in shame. Let's put our dryad's loyalty and our own personal skill to the test.>>268118828 is plenty. Arm them to the teeth. Let's do or die.
>>26811778Polygamy in humans arises under different circumstances. Polygamy in males is common if there is an extreme social rank order and one male can provide enough support for several children. Polygamy in women arises under extremely bad/harsh circumstances.You can only outlaw it if it wouldn't be common anyway. If the environment changes enough the mating system will change accordingly.
>>26811937Can the dryad scout ahead without being exposed? That'd probably be the best way. Or that raven if it managed to survive. Make sure to keep the skeletons close together (but not bunched up) so they don't get picked off one by one.
>>26811937Wait for someone to come out.Then let's practice some mind control and see what's going on here.
>>26811963We burnt out our magic, remember? No mind control for now.
>>26811974Not even one? Ouch.Still, I suggest we wait till someone comes out and snatch them if we can, or catch them off guard.
remember to reply and reroll if its taking a while, I'm taking that non reply because its the only even and we didnt get a third odd suggestion.
>>26812083I smell a trap. No, not that kind of trap, a real one.Let's do "that" later.Instead wake up and search the area.
>>26812083Really? At a time like this? Keep your senses alert, both of you, no screwing around (literally). If nothing happens in the next hour I say we just up and knock at the door with some skeletons behind at our command.But damn are we gonna have to finish that note later.
>>26812083Ain't got time for that. We need to look around to find what she's trying to distract us from.
>>26812083I knew it, she really does know and wants to kill us. It was that fucking critfail, fuck tg dice.
>>26812148You are absolutely right and I applaud you for not falling for it.Just want you to know you are missing out on a serious piece of Dryad sex scene, you fool.
>>26811534> uses an Ichigo reaction imageIs that the joke or did you really not catch the irony?
>>26812266Threaten till she takes you to friend
>>26812266>animating a skeleton in a not so dead personTake note of that for laterhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnbZQn6SE60 1:15Also, ask where she is and take us to her. If she's in the house, time to assault. If not, have some skeletons hide in the forrest for now.
>>26812266Get our genocide on. Ok not really, not yet.Instead ask our dryad where her friend is and sneak up on her. Threaten to bonify her if she gives us away.
>>26812266... why would the girl get kidnapped then? It's probably not her, or if it is she's not in the right mind. We should probably investigate further.
>>26812266I think after this is done a hatefuck or two will be in order.
>>26812314With delicious skeletal manipulation.Nah, best keep her on good terms. She is technically our closest ally.
>>26812296>the first comment is exactly what I expected it to be>>26812335She JUST tried to get us killed.
>>26812296>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnbZQn6SE60 1:15This is gonna have to be our trump card.
>>26812356>She JUST tried to get us killed.No, she. . .okay maybe she did, but that was only because her friend was nearby. I'm not convinced there was any deep seated malice.It still stands, she's the closest person to us, murderous intentions aside.
>>26812380Well regardless, we'll need to keep our friends close, and our enemies closer, even if they turn out to be one and the same
>>26812402Also, her powers/knowledge would be quite useful if we do encounter her friend
>>26812433surely we've got enough left in us for one last semi-offensive spell?
Rolled 14>>26812433Bring out your biggest, charismatic grin.Roll for diplomacy
>>26812447Sure it's called "erect">>26812433
>>26812433"FUCK OFF BITCH!" *slice her throat with your badass dagger (since hands aren't tied)*
>>26812433>I couldn't stop her even if I tried..Then, try harder!
>>26812533>"Well, why don't I have my turn first"We gonna have to impress some bitches? Someone else roll for this. I ain't gonna be blamed for this bullet.
Rolled 14>>26812533Stick it in her planter pooper
Rolled 11>>26812533>>26812559What's that guys? You need another nat 1? OK!
>>26812582Oh god this is close.
>>26812582charisma already failed.Enjoy the outcome.
>>26812604Charisma already failed?Are those the abductee's?Where the hell's the dryad.We can't let them get away. . . "Wait! Let me join you!"
>>26812604Talk to the women (probably the majors daughter) and ask wtf is going on here.
>>26812604So uh, why's the girl there again? I guess we found the mayor's daughter though. Should go and talk to her, see why she's here.
>>26812655Charisma failed.As Necromancer class, charisma isn't a specialty so higher rolls are needed.A rogue would get by no problem.
>>26812604We MGQ now. Since that is now settled I think our goal after this would be impregnating the dryad.
>>26812604Well.Uh. I guess we take all these people back?
>>26812663>26812663Whoops, meant for this but pretty much same decision anyway.
>>26812798"Okay, uh, can't you... commute or something? The mayor is getting pretty pissed off about his daughter vanishing."
>>26812798Did you just change your font?
>>26812798Tell them they are beta faggots, steal the princess back, taker her to castle, fuck her brains out and search new job
>>26812835I adjust font size often to fit the space.
>>26812798report to the mayor
>>26812835Oh shit he did. Confirmed we're in a drug induced dream and the dryad is killing us right now.
>>26812843No, no, you're thinking about this all wrong.>>26812798Take mayor's daughter back to castle, fuck her brains out, offer to escort her back to the forest for threesomes as often as she likes. We can do bodyguarding pretty well, she stays safe, we get more sex, she gets more sex, everyone's happy.
>>26812843With the dryad a loose end? Nope.Best course of action, they don't travel a lot, we use every last ounce of magic to get the dryad to shut up and come with us, and prepare an assault proper.Last resort, stick around, provide "use" to them, build up our magic, and try not to be killed ignomniously by plants.Everyman needs a code. Ours should be finishing our missions.
>>26812897How about we combine these and make that we finish our missions and fill our women, or women like things.
>>26812945Hmm, that was resolved easier than I expected.Get some skeletons, hire men if you must, surround the forrest. I want that dryad smoked out, literally if must be. No loose ends eh.
>>26812945Tell the mayor to build a park for the Alruane to live in.Half-heartedly complain about the town being full of horny assholes.
>>26812945Refuse and get our magic back on. We need a graveyard to re-raise our army.Also confront our dryad as to why she led us into a trapp, granted it wasn't horrible but still.
>>26812945Take hand of daughter.Encourage daughter to continue rebelling against her father by going back and having lots of lesbian sex with the dryad (while we watch and/or participate), but persuade her to come back to town afterwards to keep up appearances.Build up our powerbase. Hire people to make better arms and armour for our skeletons (uh, also, find and raise some more skeletons soon), get some magical tomes, etc.
>>26812945Easy.Start a heavily wooded garden on our land. Invite the flower lady to move in, enticing her with the prospect of easy pollination.Have three-way with her and mayor's daughter.After we set down some roots (HA) look for more cool shit to do.
>>26812945He can keep his daughter, clearly she likes it the other way. Time to find another job! Maybe one that actually pays money.
>>26813001How about he should just build a nice comfy park. He doesn't need to know what happens inside there.
>>26813002>Also confront our dryad as to why she led us into a trappReally?Really? You can think of no reason?
>>26812945Would be nice if we could get legless mace skelleton as our door guard.
>>26812945Begin raising our undead army once again. We don't have time for this bullshit. Maidens to woo and tyrants to crush.
>>26813016I support this as our next move. Also would help to reduce those "abductions".
>>26812945Connection to political powerbase - uh, sorry, wife - acquired. Hey, if we kill the mayor once we've married her, do we become mayor?
>>26813073>being mayor of shitty little generic village #762no thanks
Feel free to link to/re post these suggestions when they are still valid. Plenty look cool.
>>26813076Ignore them, try for a little bit more to find the dryad. If we still can't, then leave and find another job.
>>26813076Wait, did we actually marry her, or not?
>>26813076Looks like their not going anywhere.Locate the dryad and skeleton walk her back home. If not, go back to town, prepare a posse, time to teach these horny fuckers a lesson in discipline. The plants are ours though, we could use a nice garden.
>>26813076Again with this shit?Fuck the mayor's daughter, she probably has herpes. The dryad was cool though, let's invite her back into a custom-made grove back at our place. Her earth magic will come in handy when we go on adventures to increase the breadth of our necromantic powers.
>>26813076skeletize the fuckers
Maybe we should just burn this whole place to the ground.
Rolled 293>>26813076DEATHWAVE EVERYONE
>>26813111I support this through and through.Also that would be the best garden in history.We need a new thread soon though.
>>26813076>>26813127We should totally invite the dryad to a custom-made grove. It'll be closer to the town, so she'll have easier access to partners, it'll probably be magically enhanced and maintained, and she'll be protected from wandering bandit and adventurer groups.
>>26813076Ignore teens, get to the mission at hand
>>26813171I smell a business opportunity
>>26813165Well I'll be. You're right.suptg archive anyone? What ought we call it?
>>26813127So, this is the third odd ending post, that means we get custom horny dryad grove, right? Right?
>Not making a dryad brothel
>>26813191just /tg/ text adventure.We can put the shenanigans in the tags
>>26813191Mr. Bones' Wildquest
>>26813165>We need a new thread soon though.We're on page one, we have a good three hours left.>>26813204Right.
>>26813232I enter OPs magical realm.
>>26813232Ask her if she'd prefer it here. If yes, leave without her. Either way, leave to find another job.
>>26813232Fuck her good.
>>26813232We have some teenagers to clean up first. Tease the fuck out of her and say she should help us remove these little brats.
>>26813232Invite her to put roots down in our backyard. Cite the duel advantages of easy pollination and security.
>>26813262> I enter OP's magical realmIs that what the kids are calling it these days.
>>26813269>and fuck herYou forgot that part.
>>26813232Get some sweet dryad pussy.Get some sweet plant-girl pussy too.Invite them all back to a garden in the grounds of our house, where we can have regular orgies whenever we like.
>>26813298Fuck no I didn't. It's not there for a reason.
>necromancer quest>lost his entire fucking skeleton army half way though >spent the rest of the quest satisfying OP's flora fetish fucking dyrads and plantsI'm ok with this.
>>26813262One magical realm coming up.
>>26813338I think we should get back on track to secure more "assets". Also build our garden and invite the plants over.
>>26813339Well I can tell where this quest is going. Cast death on self.
If anyone's interestedhttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Text%20adventure
>>26813339This is still a good plan>>26813300Also, do dryads have assholes? Fuck her in the asshole.
>>26813338HEY. HEY. HEY.FORESTS MOTHERFUCKER. MY MILD MONSTERGIRL FETISH DOES NOT GET IN THE WAY OF THE QUEST. GET YOUR DICKS IN YOUR PANTS AND MAKE SOME SKELETONS, OR KEEP FUCKING. SEE IF I CARE. Ok It's all my fault.I do like how the goal changed from become an adventurer to "Set-up a sex garden"
>>26813339Get our garden built, convinve the horny plants to come to it and expose the brats shenanigans to their parents. That should clear stuff up.
>>26813385Every good adventurer should have a good home to come back too.As well as emergency collateral in case we find ourselves in some deep debt.
I miss the skelly antics.
Ok, dryad sex buddy achieved. Time to go through the forest and raise some skeleanimals.
>>26813385No, no it IS a real garden. Only we can have sex with some of the plants.
>>26813385You offered /tg/ fapfic, and they took it. Carry on providing good fapfic, and you will be venerated. /d/-lite loves its porn.
>>26813378Goddammit. Ok fine but after this I'm railroading you fuckers out of sex paradise. You guys are getting green fingers.
>>26813338You know, we could have had an even bigger collection of plant girls if we hadn't killed all the ones at the beginning.
>>26813378Oh hell yes. Gimme dat dryad bootay
>>26813439>killed all the ones at the beginning.Hmm, we got skeletons down but we ought to test our zombie abilities.
>>26813439We didn't realise at that point just how awesome OP's sex scenes were.
>>26813431> Green fingers10/10
>>26813439We're a necromancer. I don't know why we're fucking living things to begin with.
>>26813339I am thoroughly enjoying the accommodations offered in your magical realm, OP.But I was drawn into this magical realm under false pretences. I was told there would be skeletons, and yet there are no longer any skeletons. Basically, what I am trying to say is that while /d/ shenanigans with plant is awesome, I would really like to see some more skeletons.
>>26813431Thank god. After we have that garden set up we need to get back to questing. If onyl to secure more delicious "wildlife". I don't know about you but the plants are getting a little boring. How about something a little more..demonic?
>>26813431Give us the sex garden in our backyard and I'll vote for skeletons. I didn't really want five pages of smut, I just wanted to treat this whole thing like a trophy to pin up on our house's lawn.
>>26813494This. I'm all for magical realm shenanigans, but I would like to have a decent amount of adventuring in between. That being said, I don't think OP's doing a bad job. We fucked up, and have been out of magic for a while, and these are a pretty acceptable and plausible series of events. I like this thread OP. Good job.
>>26813488>>26813494These guys raise a good point. While the dryad pussy is awesome, we need some zombie pussy to go along with it.Those peasants back in >>26809892 mentioned a young girl very freshly dead, didn't they? Let's flex our magical might a little bit.
>>26813531>loli zombieEhhh. I'm not a big loli-guy.But okay.
As a biology student what interests me most (after the sex scenes of course) is what the leaf arrangement on our plants is? Alternate, opposite or whorls?
>>26813531OVER THE LINE
>>26813531I think it was a little girl not a young woman.
Well I guess it's time to roll with the punches boys, we're going to open the first heavy petting zoo, the liveliest attractions with the deadest security!
>>26813541I figured they just meant "young maiden", as in teenager-ish, myself. Not loli. If it's a loli, then I retract my suggestion. No zombie lolis.
>>26813544I'm not that guy, but /tg/ abandoned any concept of the line when we had Despoiler Quest.
>>26813562Good man. Teen zombie? That would be niiiiice. Loli zombie must less so.
>>26813542Whorls hopefully, a corolla perhaps.
>>26813562Honestly, though, we don't really know how old this chick was. We should go dig her up and find out, then make a decision.
>>268135812x5 tepal/sepal whorl, around the hips obviously, with the gynoecium right in the middle, one carpel, exposed stigma.HNNG>implying anyone will get this
>>26813605>Necromancer stands beside an open grave with a casket torn open>"Eeehhhh. I dunno, looks a little young.">That's the only quandary he has with this plan
>>26813642Plants and teens in the garden now.Have secret meeting with mayor to calmly and rationally discuss daughter's and kids sitation.Figure up a plan that suits everyone, and get back to questing and skeletons.
>>26813662Op here.Incapacitated with laughter.
>>26813642Let's get our zombie and skeleton army back up and running. We're magically refreshed now, right?Also, go investigate that dead girl from before. Little girl, or teenager?
>>26813642Back on track. We need to go raise a whole bunch of skeletons.
>>26813684Little girl. It was fluff.Off limits.
>>26813642Begin drawing up plans for the Great Menagerie.Become the Monstergirl Pimp. Also skeletons, I guess? We can dress them up in suits and they will work as waiting staff.
>>26813672Nah, fuck those teens, in the not literal sense. They ain't getting in our private garden.Also start raising some fucking skeletons again.
>>26813728... uh, is this a reply from the OP, or not?OP, you could really do with, like, a tripcode. Or at least a name.
>>26813747I agree, the teens can take a hike. This is private property.Let's ask the mayor where the local troublesome bandits/goblins are [insert various quest hook here] and go do some serious skeletonizing.
>/tg/ actually abandons the monstergirls to play a quest properI've seen it all.
>>26813769Yeah, this. Call yourself Mr. Bones, OP. Or something.
>>26813747Got to keep our plants occupied otherwise they're likely to leave.
>>26812433Best to diplomacy our way the fuck outta this.Also, when it come to rolling, is it first roll only, or best of 3, or what?
>>26813777>abandonsWhoa whoa whoa, lets not get crazy here. We're just making them not our highest priority. Harem-end is still a thing.
>>26813777>implyingNah, we do this to get more and more exotic monstergirls. The plants are secured, we're just moving on.
>>26813639Is this what biologists get off on?
>>26813809As a man who has dated biologist, yes. Yes it is.
>>26813777We had our gratuitous smut, it's time to get shit done. Bitches don't know 'bout our skeletons.>implying we won't start a collection of monstergirls while becoming badass necromancer overlord
>>26813777Can't call it "abandons" when the QM has to come and drag them away from the monster girls.
>>26813792Our dryad said that they only need to fuck like once a year. That they are so out of control now is because their "food" was so readily available.
>>26813816Go to the forest and raise some animalskeles. We blight druid now.
>>26813747Let's not be greedy. We need to advertise, and have skeleton manservants to keep an eye on things.It'll be like a whorehouse, only not actually in a house and with monstergirls. We'll be rich, and famous.
>>26813816Get more skeletons, then go off to another town and find work.
>>26813819>>26813819I am literally just describing a female, well lower torso, in botany terms. Minus the leaves of course.
>>26813816I dunno. Describe some shit OP. Where the fuck are we and who are the players?Kill local bandits to restart our army and then travel toward the nearest large city in search of a plot hook.
>>26813816Raise skeleton staff for our mansion.Begin drawing up plans to turn a significant portion of it into a monstergirl brothel, including the gardens. Also, maybe have the brothel be free, but have the income source be refreshments like snacks and drinks.
I'm trying to remember if we ever took up the offer of that first town's corpses from John, we should probably get to that if that's still possible.
>>26813903We could troll the townspeople and skeletonize John.
>>26813869So >>26813819s ex was a plant lesbian?
1) graveyard, raise skeletons2) solve any local bandit problems3) go find work>>26813903this could be good.
>>26813933Send them to feel out for fallen human corpses and possible bandit camps or anything of worth.
>>26813918>plant lesbianHoly shit the mayors daughter?
Risky business that is, I'm pretty sure we never got to take the corpses from that town's graveyard though, and that was part of the original agreement, unless that was all done without mention.
>>26813933Excellent. Send our wolf pack out to sniff out any criminals in the vicinity of the town. Add them to our army.
>>26813933Raise human skeletons from that one graveyard.Buy them some fancy clothes.
>>26813933Get some more skeletons from the graveyard, assign some of them to mansion duty, take a small entry fee become rich.
>>26813969>wolf packFoxes. Small foxes.
After all the plant sex, fox skelingtons? I have mixed feelings regarding where this is going.
>>26814006Surely only good things can come of this.
>>26814006It's going wonderful places, anon. OPs magical realm is truly a beautiful place.Though it's looking like we might need a new thread soon.
>>26814006We now go back to being a proper necromancer. Until we find something else to fuck.
>>26814037In the spirit of necromancy, we'll raise a new one once this one is truly dead.
>>26814037We're still on page 5, we're fine.
Let's make some of these things.
>>26814066I think we can only do bones, otherwise we wouldn't have had to strip the raven clean when we reanimated it.
>>26814066We're still not sure if we have the flesh part down, we've only done bones as it is.
>>26814066>>26814091>>26814099Plus remember the last time we tried to do something new... that critfail is waiting to strike again at our weakest moment.
>>26814126Head to the next big town/city and look for more work. I want to equip our skeletons with good weapons and armor someday.
>>26814126What this guy said >>26814144Ignore >>26814132
>>26814170Love you OP
>>26814170good work>>26814126Let's find a way to put our stylish skeletons to work.
>>26814170>plante rape is cool>zombie lolis are wrongwelp
>>26814170I don't know what purposes you had in mind, but I just wanted her to be adorable.
>>26814262You see her legs are long enough that I would be alright tapping that.
>>26814267Let them outside except one, convince the guards he's our "mobility assistant" and fake a walking impairment.
>>26814170Have the skeletons hand out flyers for our alraune garden.
>>26814267Dismantle bones for now.Approach city, try to gain entry, look at the situation and what it has to offer.
>>26814299Stealth is good for now.>>26814294I like this plan.
>>26814267Approach the gate slowly, probably have most of the contingent wait out of sight.
>>26814353I cast pestilence
>>26814294So that works for the most of them, but what of Skullmace, he's still a plough-drawn monstrosity of twitching bone.
>>26814353Time to start casting mind control bullshit everywhere. "This is not the necromancer you are looking for."
>>26814353Mind control him to let you in.
>>26814353Quickly mind-control them.If that fails, time to beat it. They won't follow us into the desert and our magic is enough to subsist while we're out there.We can double back and get into the city by hopping the wall.
>>26814374Let the gaurds see what we can do >>26812296
>>26814374This is about to get bad...
>>26814353"What's the punishment? It'd be funny if it was death."Stall like a bastard while the skeletons that you immediately called out to mentally when you met resistance to arrive.
>>26814353Well I say we animate the skeleton inside the guard, have our "mobility assistant" duke it out with the guard skeleton, and then we just act in terror as though we had been ambushed by the two of them, making it seem like the guard was a double-agent.
>>26814420Fuck this shit. We bounce.
>>26814420take a pamphlet, excuse yourself to the restroom and go get your undead army.
>>26814420Time to book it! Hopefully we're not locked in, otherwise this is gonna get ugly.
>>26814420gtfoalert our skeletons but let them keep some distance we can leave our gentlebone to hold them back while we run
>>26814420As I said, stall like a bastard while the rest of your contingent shows up to hold them off.
>>26814442followed by fleeing.
>>26814420What is this, discworld?Welp, retreat! Without our magic we're just some random murderhobo with higher-than-average charisma and shitty dexterity.Let's do some research into anti-anti-magic while we bolster out control over the lands in which we are more well-regarded.
>>26814420Shit, uh, run the fuck away I guess
>>26814420Fuck this place and everyone in it.We're never coming near alliance territory again unless we have an actual fucking army.
>>26814462>higher-than-averageI think you mean lower
I guess boneshaping is out of the equation then? Casually run away.
Having "Extensive Illusion Spells" and not using them. Good job guys. Maybe get your head out of the garden and concentrate on playing your class?
>>26814489What it be?
>>26814520Get away as quickly as possible while still retaining dignity.
>>26814520We Paranoia now.Time to boogie.
Question OP. Can necromancers fuck with abominations? or is it undead exclusively?
>>26814520Where the fuck is my back-up. As slow as theirs it seems. Flee motherfucker flee!
>>26814520Fuck off outta there and do it snappy like!
>>26814520Goddamn, it's the Ministry of Happiness up in this bitch. Time to GTFO until we have something that can protect our skeletons from the anti-magic.
>>26814567Our back up is kind of SOL when it comes to an anti-magic zone I believe, like the one we're in. We still have that ziggly knife though I think.
>>26814520Time to bounce.This place is a shithole. Let's go back to the other city and establish our undead empire.
>>26814606Go to another town.
>>26814563Fleshsmithy is learnable but not currently known by our protagonist.
Hey OP, are you writing all this for a reason? As an exercise to improve your skills because want to write for a living, or is it just for fun?
>>26814606These people are fucking crazy. Run, nigga. RUN
>>26814606Go someplace NOT run by these guys.
>>26814606I don'tWhat just happenedLeave that place, go anywhere else.
>>26814606Alright, if we're not going to go through there, we can go around, over, or under. Either we make some sweet bone-carriages or a skelecopter, possibly out of the defunct Skullmace. That or we just nope the fuck out of here.
>>26814622I was bored. I do this on /v/ occasionally.I like an excuse to run a light hearted game, on my own time, and writing a little fapfic is nice too.I'd seriously appreciate any criticism though.
Use Detect dead to search the area for fresh murders. Gotta be someone else who hates the smileocracy. We should find a rogue, or someone who is already fighting these people and enlist their help.
>>26814606Get a notebook and make a list "Things to kill"1. The Alliance
>>26814606What is wrong with these peopleLet's go somewhere else. Back to the other town, I think.
>>26814606Take the disguise of one my skeletons, the top hat + monocle, try to get in again, without telling them I'm a necromancer.
>>26814646Not much so far. But if you plan on continuing this do it proper, which just means get a trip and a regulat schedule or even better a twitter on which you announce threads.
Well shit guys, this makes me think about this, we're on the radar now. We gotta disappear.
>>26814622Do you ask this to everyone who makes a quest?
>>26814646You wouldn't happen to be the guy who wrote all that deer erotica, would you?
>>26814683Not really, I rarely even post on these kinds of threads because my commands suck. What, is it a oft repeated question?
>>26814686>deer eroticaThe fact that I am intrigued by this should worry me deeply but it doesn't.
>>26814686I would not happen to be that guy.The only fapfic I write comes out of these. I've done about five on /v/, and a couple here.Generally what happens is the first thread goes on until I'm too tired to carry on, then the second thread is ignored, I get discouraged and wait a month or two to do it again.
>>26814646I'm enjoying what you've written so far, both the quirky necromancer adventure and the fapfic parts. As for criticism, maybe avoid using the same descriptive term multiple times in your extended pieces. Use them synonyms, bro.
>>26814704Well, things are looking good here.I say we arm even more skelletons, and go look for someplace else.Preferably enemies of the alliance.
>>26814704let's make another golem
>>26814704Go have sex with a deer.
>>26814704Go search for the nearest treasure map/old man with a rumor and find TREASURE!
>>26814712Nope, it just seemed like a very odd question.
>>26814742Oh god damn it.
>>26814704Take your money, take your dead, go buy some weapons in the next town NOT alliance run.Some of those newfangeld muskets would be nice.
>>26814745I like this idea. Skelly antics with dungeon traps.
>>26814704Begin campaign to become mayor. Have skeletons dressed in fancy clothes on street corners, handing around pamphlets.
>>26814704We keep questing damn you! There are bastards out there waiting to be killed by us!>Captcha: Victories orresiaDamn skippy captcha, to victory!
>>26814764I need to take a shit, and looking at that made the shit shoot back up deep inside me.
>>26814686I am both sickened and intrigued.Link please.
>>26814742Well I say anything goes. Anything goes.
>>26814823Fuck off, go and do >>26814745 instead.
>>26814823We go adventuring with skellys goddamnit.
>>26814734Bfq went 140 or so threads. This is better than Bfq.Just keep a consistent schedule and you /will/ have an audience on /tg/.Or get a twitter if you can't keep it consistent.
>>26814823Ask them if they want to try out your brothels.
>>26814823kill centaurs fuck centaursraise centaurs
>>26814717>>26814726>>26814734It wasn't a big deal, it's just that another guy was doing a text adventure on /v/ and he made the msitake to include a deer on the story. The thread, from that point onward, was everyone telling him to rape, kill, revive and rape again the deer. He even tried to ignore it at first and killed off the deer, which prompted everyone to order to revive it, and have him run off one night, whereas every command was to frantically search for the creature. Eventually he gave up and wrote some sex scenes.Oddly enough, the story still managed to progress quite nicely, and was one of the funnier text adventures I"ve read.
>>26814823Get a hoof-job from a centaur
>>26814853You got the order all wrong bro, it'skill centaursraise centaursfuck centaurs
>>26814823Unless we murder these bastards, there's jack shit to do here.
>>26814890Could always get some centaurs for the menagerie.
>>26814868how are we supposed to fuck bones
>>26814908Unless that means kill them and resurrect them so we can have our skelly gentlemen as undead calvalry...
>>26814908Or we could get some centaur corpses to add to the army. I have bigger plans than brothel running.
>Fucking deers is cool>Loli zombies is right out
>>26814935Try and find some lost tomb full of loot. Ask around.
>>26814935Back to adventures.Find enemies of the alliance.I want to see that town burn.
>>26814935Thank them for considering it and be on our way. Let's go find some adventures. A haunted crypt or a cave or some rumoured treasure.
I say we find a way to keep a tab on these folks.
>>26814935Plan our war on the alliance. We need some good skeleton fodder.
>>26814858Hmmm. I remember a couple of absolute disasters that went like that, but can't remember the deer. That might be the one where the guy went insane from all the voices in his head and hallucination. Did he have a mother and aunt back in a tower?
>>26814935go adventuring with skellys. Goddamn. This has turned into brothel quest.
>>26814935Learn to dance
>>26814963We're right proper deep in OPs magical realm now, son.There's no escape. The skeletons are a sidenote in Monstergirl Brothel Adventure.
>>26814935I said murder damn you!Murder those fucks like no other!
>>26814963>That pictureThe legs would just fall off after the first few hard thrusts.0/10 would not bang
>>26814935Chart a course for adventure lad. We're escapin' this hell hole of monster pussy if its the last thing we do.
You know, if we died right now, what are they going to put on our tombstone?>"Mr. Bones">"He had great brothels"
>>26815036Off to kill a dude and take his loot!
>>26815036Raise an army. We march to war.>ask the dryad if she wants to have another adventure
>>26815046>Mr Bones>Flower-Fucker>Brothel Owner>Dryad-Murderer
>>26815036Finally. Get our gentleskellys ready. We ride for war tonight boys.
>>26815036>>26815053Fuck yes! Kill his fucking heart!
>>26815036Take our undead army and go and ruin this bloke's day.
That caves sounds like it'd have an awful lot of primo stuff, so checking it out doesn't sound that bad, now we just have to consider how to get past the tomb of horrors-esque escapades that await.
>>26815125Wait, do we even know how to fight?Train yourself on basic fighting techniques on the way.
>>26815125>army>30 skeletons>after 10 years of studying>not even any elitesYeah no. How about getting a proper fighting force first.
>>26815125We're armed right?Well what are we waiting for.If we can't interest this bored fellow in debauchery, then a good fight should interest him.
>>26815125Wait guys, I've got this.Give Mega Skullmace a second try.
>>26815125Give one of them a ten foot pole and have it on trap duty.
>>26815229Get them skeletons some actual armor and weapons and also get a bigass brute build together. Let's hope we don't critfail this time.
>>26815229What's the cutting edge of technology here?How many skeletons can we possibly find?Let's try another moderate experiment with reasonable calculated risks.
ALRIGHT I GOT A TWITTER@tgtextadventureFollow if you want to be notified of the next game. Maybe if I organise better it won't flop after the first thread again.
>>26815278>flopI came into this thread with no expectations, so I'd call it a pretty great thread for what it is.
>>26815125We need more! I want him so fucking dead, ten of me couldn't raise his ass. Burn it all to the fucking ground.
>>26815278Very good. Good quests tend to have quite a long lifetime on /tg/, as long as you keep a semi regular schedule.Also we are at 560 posts, it's time for a new thread.
>>26815322No new thread until it's finally dead.
>>26815322Actually it's time for bed. I stayed up until 5Am and these seems as good a place to end as any.Thanks for playing guys. I mentioned the twitter a few posts ago.I'll be sure to keep it up as frequently as I can.
Alright, let's cook up some ideas by looking at what we have, we have half of a super Skullmace, 30 normal skeletons, our skelanimals include a monkey, a dog, an owl, a raven and a pack of foxes.
>>26815342Oh shit its 6.Goddammit guys.
>>26815349I almost forgot to mention that we have a plough.
>>26815342I have abandoned going to sleep tonight in order to fix my sleeping schedule, it's 6:40 here.And thanks for the quest, looking forward to next thread. Also let's see that we can keep the fapfics parts to maybe once every 2 or 3 threads, makes it a little more special.
>>26815349One day, when we're all powerful, we ought to just buy a catacomb or something.
>>26815379I was treating this as a one shot, since someone normally hits the suicide button and we reroll, but this went quite nicely.The fapfic will be doled out a little better now.
Also any suggestions, comments, criticisms just post em here or tweet me I guess. I'm happy to get any.
>>26815349We also have 1 dryad that is not very good at combat and doesn't want to go and several alraunes that are otherwise occuppied.
>>26815349Why not make the plough into a chariot, have Skullmace ride it as it is being pulled by fox skeletons?
>>26815417It should be noted that I'm just writing down ideas for the next thread coming around, and I'm not the OP. I just like thinking of cool things to do with animated skeletons.
>>26815417Oh yes please. I want this playing in the background when we arrive on ithttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiIDNlEP9KEOr at least playing in our mind.
>>26815444Yeah yeah, you could also graft Skullmace onto the top of an already dead centaur
>>26815444>I just like thinking of cool things to do with animated skeletons.
>>26815454You know, I never quite understood the scope of Skullmaces size, is he giant or just a really well reinforced skelly?
>>26815349You are forgetting our very broken spell list, with entries such as "Myriad cantrips" and "Extensive Illusions", not to mention killing people by looking at them.
>>26815521Well the thing is, we have some unspecified limit of casting apparently, unless limitations only come about through terrible failures like with Skullmace.
>>26815557I don't think Mega Skullmace was on the spell list, so that's why we had to roll to make it. Anything on the spell list though... well, if it's like what happened with the bandits, we don't have to roll.
>>26815462Our mansion shall be a constant party, with raving skeletons, monstergirl hookers, and so very much cocaine.
>>26815557We rolled a one on one of the powerful spells. I'm pretty sure that was a punishment of the dice rather than any sort of limit on our part. Before dice got involved, we had no problems firing off whatever the scene required.
>>26815581The question now is, do we give creating constructs a second chance?
>>26815615Sacrifice a goat to the dice gods first.
Rolled 10>>26815629Maybe that'll fix it!
>>26815640That seemed to help a little bit.But the gods still thirst for more. A human sacrifice is in order!
>>26815629Maybe we can modify the Mega Skullmace to make him more easily changed in the future?
>>26815462>>26815381>>26815573Our mansionshall be made of skeletons