Previous Threads:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=HoboQuestUpdates posted at @HoboRiftQuest.WELCOME BACK TO HOBOQUEST!The quest where IT'S MARDI GRAS SEASON, BITCHES! LET'S DRINK SOME BOOZE, KILL SOME ZOMBIES, AND FUCK SOME MONSTERGIRLS!You are LINCOLN BISMUTH, ALCOHOLIC HOBO EXTRAORDINAIRE!......AND YOU ARE OUT OF BOOZE. YOU ARE OUT OF BOOZE. FATAL ERROR, DOES NOT COMPUTE. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO!? You're stuck in the Corpselands in a mausoleum because you accidentally pissed off like, at least a hundred zombies and skeletons and ghouls and who knows what else, and now they're banging on the door. Plus, you only have Fritz and Illiana with you, so you can't fly out with Moira or just honk Zuli to get her to rage-crush them.......But none of this actually fucking matters because MOTHERFUCKER YOU'RE OUT OF BOOZE WHYYYYYYYYY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH![Roll 1d20 to resist instantaneous withdrawal symptoms]
Rolled 13>>23067256Just had to run this now, didn't ya?
Rolled 17>>23067256Quick, think about booze as a distraction!
>>23067452I resent/resemble the implication that my Quest-running schedule is anything but predictable.CAN'T HEAR YOUR COMPLAINTS IF I'M TOO DRUNK TO CARE
Rolled 5>>23067559Mostly grumping because I'm busy with my Quest at the moment, and will be missing out on most of the shenanigans until I wrap up. SO, have fun (and another crappy die roll).Good to see you've solved your PC issues, though. Or at least enough that you're posting again.
>>23067609Well, you know how this thing goes. Missing shit is sort of a non-issue. Besides, it'll probably take a bit of time before enough people realize I'm posting again before I get enough responses to feel comfortable that I've been inclusive.And yes, I managed to fix not one, but BOTH of my PCs. The desktop of which I rabidly installed Fallout games after being unable to sate my craving for them after over two months.
>>23067685Three and NV? or One, Two, and Tactics?Sage for polite off-topic, though I know it does nothing.
>>23067724Three and NV at the moment, as I need a more powerful computer than my laptop to play those and I never got to explore all the content last time I was seized by a Fallout frenzy for various reasons.I'm too drunk to remember how to sage, so y'all just gonna have to take it. Besides, tech of Fallout advancement can totally be considered relevant to this quest. I'm NOT drunk enough to reveal why, and because spoiling surprises is boring.
Rolled 15>>23067256rolling to resist imbibing Mini slime & Mini Booze as last-resort plan...
i just opened up the Story book, preparing to add the updates once they finally arrive, and in the Introduction, i noticed that you misspelt 'bed' as 'bead'...and before you claim that you were drunk, this was before you started drinking like Lincoln for the quest.>implying you aren't actually Lincoln Bismuth and this is just you recounting your adventures into Riftia and bragging about it...
A new HoboQuest? Damn, that's something I've been waiting for. I need something to pick me up after my friend dumped me.Unfortunately, I need to repair my heater, so I can't respond for a while, HK. Feel free to drop any requests though, as usual.And I'll just leave this here. As a proof why I shouldn't be drawing in SAI. And because Blues Brothers.
Rolled 8>>23069348Also, rollan' for endurance.
>>23068925........I admit NOTHING.>>23069348Once again, I reiterate how much better of a drawing this is than anything I can do, because my hands are terminally retarded when it comes to rendering anything I can see in my head. All I can do is try to describe them vividly enough and hope that people who CAN draw find them interesting enough to help me make them a reality. So yeah, BLUE BROTHERS WOOOOOO.
Aw yeah, made it for the beginning of a thread for once. Dis gone bee gud
Rolled 6>>23069919forgot to roll
>>23067256Just got banned from /tg/ SS13 for a week due to LOLNOFUNZONEThis is good distraction.Also, honk Illiana's boobs as a mild compensation for being trapped and without booze.And have her light a flame so we can look around and get an idea of just what surroundings we're in. Any hidden exits?
Rolled 8>>23070038>>23069406>>23068925>>23067724who is missing besides Papa N?>>23070046also this
Also to anyone who's interested - I recently found a manga with a premise similar to HoboQuest, only with (sadly) less monstergirls (there are some though) and alcohol (yet).If you're not bothered with Japanese art style or humor - give it a shot, if only to see a dragon's arm getting blown of by a Panzerfaust.For anyone interested - the name's "Gate - Thus the JSDFfought there", and yes I know you've seen the links it HK, I've read Generation A recently.
>>23070238Forgot the picture.
>>23070238the translation team updates so fucking slow though
>>23070238HAH. Would you believe that this was one of the original inspirations for me starting this? I was talking to Papa-N about it when I got the idea.Mostly because it was updating so slow and "YOU CALL THESE MONSTERGIRLS!?!? I'LL SHOW YOU FUCKING MONSTERGIRLS, YOU HALF-ASSED TWATS!"
>>23070510I WAS the person who posted it originally to Gen A. I just hadn't started tripfagging yet.
Rolled 15>>23070510>>23070536Buuueeeeeeeno.Also>>23070046This. Especially the honking, to get her out of her terror-filled fugue.
>>23070887this is true. is has been proven that rage superceeds all emotions, and HOBO SWAG superceeds rage...
Rolled 13>>23067256ok calm down. we..we can make our own booze!we just need some simple things like a kettle and a bit of water and something to ferment! hmm what do we have that is ferment-able?...potatoes? no? hmm well i suppose technically the zombies may be fermenting..we..we could try to make zombie booze!
good to see you are back you magnificent drunken hobo
GO TO YOUR HAPPY PLACE LINCOLN.
Rolled 4Goddamnit The dice didn't work.
>>23067256>out of booze
Rolled 12Egads..... hmmm, well, it seems we should never have tried to screw with the undead. It always ends badly. wait, we're in a crypt! shouldn't there be like, treasure or a magical sword or armor or something that someone isn't using at the moment because they're dead? if not, then aren't we able to like, break off some poor sod's arms and use them as flails? Hey, we already have the undead pissed at us, what's a bit of needless dessecration of someone's grave when you're already about to be torn limb from limb by the howling, mindless masses of zombies.
"NNNNNNGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!"You grit your teeth in a pained snarl, dropping to the floor as the horrific situation sinks in. You fist your hands in your ungroomed hair, pulling as you take wide-eyed, heavy breaths."Lincoln!? What's wrong!?" Fritz shouts, even as he continues to push back against the shuddering makeshift barricade keeping the zombies from murderdeathfucking you all.Your panicked, alcohol-dependent brain fails to hear him. You're out of booze. You're not SUPPOSED to be out of booze! That's not a thing that should happen! You start thinking too much when you're not drunk, and thinking never leads to anything good. Not for you. Not after---"AAAAAAAAAAAGHFUCKSTOPNONONO!" You smash your head against the stone floor of the mausoleum repeatedly, screeching that unhealthy line of thinking to a halt. Thinking isn't going to help you. You're still intoxicated---for now. You just have to find another way out of here before you're sober again for too long! Preferably in a method involving explosions. Those are always nice and distracting.Plus, you can always blow your own head off if the sobriety gets too painful. HUZZAH OPTIONS!
"Lincoln!? Lincoln!?!?" Illiana yells at you in increasing panic. You respond with a shaky groan as you hoist yourself off the ground, staggering to your feet and giving her fake grin."False alarm! I was imagining zombie rape with wrinkly decomposing undead dongs and totally freaked out." You cheerfully stroll up to the worried looking inari, who's face quickly turns to revulsion at the mental image you just casually stuck in her brain."Thankfully, I have something to take my mind off that horrible abomination of thought." You proceed to grab your substitute source of comfort in this trying time of drought: foxgirl titties."Ahhhhhhh. MUCH better. The GOOD kind of squishy." You giggle as you give the inari's respectable chest a good honking.Pity she proceeds to light your coat on fire a few seconds later."AAAAAAAAAAAGHFIREFIREFIREFIRE!" You scream, now sufficiently distracted from your misery as you sprint around the crypt in circles, flailing your arms like a drunken air traffic controller."We're trapped in a crypt by undead and YOU'RE GRABBING MY BREASTS!?" Illiana screams at you, channeling her inner Zuli.You'd justify your priorities towards her (Counterpoint: TITS), but you're a bit preoccupied at the moment BEING ON FUCKING FIRE.>[Roll 1d20 to stop, drop, and something something HAVING NO BOOZE SUCKS]
Rolled 2>>23073393IMBIBE LIQ..... THE FIRE!!!!yes. Imbibe the fire, that is totally what i meant...
Rolled 15>>23073393>put out fire>wait. we have fire producing people?>we use the fox girl as a flamethrower and mow the undead down>Honk titties until it produces piles of zombie ashes.>imbibe li -.....awcrap
Rolled 19>>23073393Maybe if we vomit up alcohol, we can drink it again?No, then we won't have drunk it the first time.
Rolled 20>>23073358Rolling for ALCOHOLMANCY.
>>23073620Did...did we just magic alcohol into existence?
>>23073620YOU GLORIOUS BASTARD!!!either we have turned the Fire into Alcohol, OR, (Hobotopia forbid) the Fire has found the Last of the Alcohol.... and subsequently devoured it...
>>23073669I was gonna an alcohol girl, but we already have - Wait! We have minibooze! We can lick her for a booster buzz!
Rolled 6>>23073669who cares. IT'S ALCOHOL! drink it and use it to solve zombie problem!
>>23073620The dice gods smile upon Lincoln this day!
>>23073620Please tell me this actually gives us access to Alcoholmancy.
>>23073931i doubt it... it didn't work the previous two times, so it is unlikely to work this time...
>>23073970Dont worry. Its only a matter of time before we gain access to magic.
>>23074024Lincoln Bizmuth + Magic + Alcohol = HOBOTOPIA
>>23074069Needs more harem.
>>23074024Personally I like to think Lincoln is a natural Alcoholmancer. Having absorbed this world's magic has made his already impress Alcohol Tolerance godlike. I mean when he first got here barely out drinking an oni put him in a mini coma. A short time later he was able to out drink an entire village(granted I don't have any hard numbers to compare the two incidents) .
>>23074233That which does not kill you makes you ever stronger. By this logic, Lincoln may now very well have an alcohol-tolerance surpassing an Oni's.
Rolled 12>>23073538This guy gets it. Do this!Also, once back up, honk her again to assert dominance.Then...OH! Idea! We use the smoke from her flames to locate any hidden air flow in the room!
>>23074709Technically, he have an alcohol tolerance just a tick above an Oni's starting out.
>>23074069>>23074024>>23073970>>23073931>>23073733>>23073717>>23073695>>23073691>>23073669>>23073620I assure you, all these alcoholmancy 20s you all keep rolling ARE, in fact, doing something. I just refuse to say what.Actually, there's pretty much meaning behind everything, just 99.9% of it is invisible.Or I'm just being a drunken asshole and trying to obfuscate things. As usual.
>>23076750All of the above, most likely.
Rolled 5>>23076750Give us more boobs and monstergirl sexings, oh drunken one!But I like the idea of using Illiara's flames to make smoke. Smoke that is used to find a flow of air, so we can escape.And if we can incorporate more groping into it, hell, let's go for it.
>>23076750Out of curiosity, how many nat 20 Alcoholmancy rolls have we had?
"Hilarious zombiegirl/skeleton girl comedy duo confirmed"I seriously hope no-one forgot this
>>23077022I'm not quite sure. I just know it's been done often enough for me to have noticed.>>23077029At least SOMEONE remembers.....
>>23077029What about the forbidden romance between a fire girl and a dryad that got nat 20'd?
I find it funny Hobo Quest returns on the day /tg/ makes a horrifying new monstergirl.>>23072864>Anglermans are seemingly monogendered race of musclegirls with wriggling tentacles attached to them at odd intervals. These tentacles are actually the males of the race that attach themselves to females and fuse into their bodies over time, becoming nothing more than a sperm factory with some ancillary organs. Anglermans use their tentacles to impregnate both themselves and any females they come across. The lure on their head emits an aura of docility that allows to either feed on or impregnate their prey with ease. It is also incredibly sensitive.>Boom, something fit for either Kingdom Death or Monster Girl Encyclopedia.
Rolled 9>>23079007Oh god Anglermans vore inbound. Oh my gooooooooooooooooooooood.
>>23079073Ohhhhh nonononono. I shall not waste such an opportunity by shoehorning it into an unrelated scene. I mean, we're not even near any water.No, this one's going to lurk in the background of the quest. Watching. Waiting. And when you least expect it.....THE VORE TRAIN SHALL LEAVE THE STATION.The Hobo King is pleased this night.
Rolled 13>>23079105I didnt mean soon, I just mean that if we ever go to the ocean, we have to look out for Anglermans now.
Rolled 6>>23079105HK, are you just waiting for us to roll a 1 before you start writing?It's been hours since that 20, HK.HK plsPls HK
Rolled 15>>23079411He is drinking and laughing at our pain.
Rolled 8>>23079411if you want him to answer all you need to do is create some fan art and post it.
>>23079446>>23079754Both of these are acceptable answers.Also acceptable are "Mardi Gras", "Mardi Gras", and "Mardi Gras".
>>23080322How many updates could HoboKing make, if HoboKing could make updates?btw, did you want any more architecture concept sketches HK?
>>23080632Sketch me a mausoleum.
>>23080322Shit, I keep forgetting you are swamp people too....it kinda weirds me out to think I have probably gone to some of the same parades as you.
>>23080830I drift amongst the unsuspecting crowds, praying on the feeble wills of the weak. None know what horrors of the mind lurk beneath my grinning exterior.
>>23080877You and every other denizen of New Orleans.
You fling yourself floorward, frantically rolling around like a retarded rolling pin as you attempt to smother the flames scorching your precious coat......And what do ya know, it works! Sometimes, things really are that simple. Not "all of the zombies trying to break in have magically converted to vegetarianism" simple, but hey, you'll take what you can get at this point.Patting away some of the cinders from the lightly smoldering edge of your baroque coat o' pockets, you turn towards Illiana, pout evident on your face."Tit grabbing is not a valid excuse for SETTING ME ON FIRE." You growl at the foxgirl, annoyance dripping from every word. A good coat should not be damaged lightly."Y-You had it coming for a while." Illiana mumbles back, slight stutter the only evidence that she might be less inclined to be stern about your actions than Zuli would be. Which is noted, of course, by the distinct lack of facial flesh belonging to you having been cheese grater-ed all over the crypt walls, as per angry red oni operating procedure.You let out a small sigh. You miss that woman. She could probably just PUNT you to nearest booze.
"Erm, guys? Not to be insistent, but.....zombies?" Fritz grunted as a particularly spirited shove nearly sent him sprawling. You give him a few curious blinks, the ever-receeding drunkenness making it hard to focus."Oh. Right. Magical zombie horde attempting gory makeouts with our faces. Forgot about that for a second." What to do about it, though? Illiana's flame may have set some of them ablaze and heated the metal door until it was scorching hot, but she only can put out so much. Fritz can't hold them forever, and you have limited ammo (how much, you're not sure; counting is hard)......Well, there's always grave-robbing.>What do?[ ] Attempt to fight your way out of the mausoleum][ ] [Illiana tail-helicopter][ ] [search for secret passages because THERE HAVE TO BE SECRET PASSAGES][ ] [other]
>>23081142We have a bottleneck-the door. This image should explain everything.
Rolled 7>>23081142[ ] [search for secret passages because THERE HAVE TO BE SECRET PASSAGES]there is always a secret passage.>[ ] Pretend to imbibe liquor to help settle nerves
>>23080897We are an odd bunch, aren't we? Though I prefer it that way, honestly.Probably should grab a few z's since I have work in less than five hours. Though that'll leave me with plenty of time during my shift to type shitloads.
>>23081177This image is glorious and pretty much describes my go-to strategy.
>>23081142>[ ] [Illiana tail-helicopter]That is all
Rolled 6>>23081142>[x] [Illiana tail-helicopter]Is there any other way?
>>23081344>>23081373I am in good company. I was afraid I would be the only one to vote for that.
>>23081142what we will do, is Fight the zombies, While looking for Secret Passageways Mounted on Illiana using the secret Tail-Helicopter technique While carrying Fritz who will rain death upon the hordes of the un-dead...also, i tried doing some enviormental shading in this one. not too happy with how it turned out, but at least it didn't ruin the picture...
>>23081142let's fly away! it works in video game so it *has* to work in real life! right?....riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight?okay fine let's head in the mausoleum and try to find MAGICAL TREASURE!
>>23082008maybe this is the resting place of the fabled 'ever-full tankard'...
>>23082058who knows? and thats why me must explore, for ADVENTURE! but seriously this is a bizarre one...
>>23082152HK went to bed so he can update at work...and only a combination of drawfagging AND nat1s will summon him...
Rolled 14>>23082748watch me fail at the nat 1 part of the summoning
Rolled 12>>23082825It, of course, would have been funnier if you had rolled a 20.
Rolled 10>>23082846IA IA HOBO KING FHTAGN
Rolled 9>>23082886If I roll an 8...
>>23081142[ ] [search for secret passages because THERE HAVE TO BE SECRET PASSAGES]BELIEVE.
Rolled 9>>23082748Nat1s you say?
so, do we agree that Lincoln shall search for secret passages & treasures while riding upon Illiana, who will use her Tail-helecopter (which she probably doesn't even know she has, the poor girl), while Fritz covers us by filling the Zombies with bullets.Yea or Nay to the plan?
Rolled 6>>23083052I don't feel strongly one way or the other.
Rolled 9>>23083052>Tail-helecopterI see no way this could not work.
Rolled 12>>23083052pretty much this yes
might i trouble you all for you opinion on my sketch? I am aware that no drawfag am i, but one has to start somewhere... is the shading a good thing to add, or should i just leave it more schematics than artwork...
Rolled 9>>23083392frankly? the building his probably better than anything I can draw.as for shading, I'd say wait until you fell really confident you can do it without ruining your drawing.the most I ever drawn was four characters in the same pic so I may not be the best at advices, but as you said drawfags have to start somewhere; so keep drawing until you get better.
Rolled 19Thread seems a bit slow.Rollin' for 1
Rolled 17>>23084194do not tempt the dice gods
Search for secret passages damnit! i want to believe!
Rolled 6GDI, misplaced the dice
You all get REALLY bored whenever I'm gone, don't you?The Hobo King is amused.
Though the lack of ones is getting confusing.
Alright, seems the consensus is:[X] Try to do something productive with tail-copter...........You all know this is going to end in stupid, don't you?
Rolled 20>>23085433Dammit, that was supposed to be a diceroll, not a sage.
>>23085445the dice gods work in mysterious ways..
Rolled 8>>23084957Wasn't that the gist of HoboQuest?Also, I might scrounge some time to draw stuff, but nothing overly complicated I'm afraid. Would a bunch of black-silhouette-on-a-flat-color-background title screens for Hobo Quest be alright?
>>23085634Dude, draw whatever you feel like in whatever art style you feel like. Any artwork at ALL fills me with a sense of joy. And intoxication.And OF COURSE that's one of the main points of HoboQuest. I just like to make sure nobody's forgotten every now and then, is all.
Rolled 3>>23085598At least it looks like Operation Foxgirl Attack Helicopter is a go.
Rolled 16Actually, screw vague silhouettes. If I'm going to do vague things I'm going to do them WITH STYLE. And fur collars.Unfortunately, that's all you'll be getting from me as my brother just spilled coffee over my tablet, which as you can guess impedes my drawing ability. I wanted to draw Lincoln's second arm, but I guess I should be happy that I saved enough to make a decent picture.
What variant of Abrahms do we have? if its the m1 then we have 15mm less dakka on our main cannon, lack thermal imaging, have less armour, and dont have a CBRN protection system built in.
Fighting through the encroaching taint of nausea and throbbing agony flitting about the corners of your mind, you suddenly happen upon an idea.A BRILLIANT idea."OHOHOHOHO!" You cackle, the genius of it taking an ever-clearer form in your head. Perhaps that tumor you call a brain isn't so bad after all."Erm....L-Lincoln?" Illiana hesitantly asks, though by her tense body language, you can tell that she's already realizing that you laughing equals happy happy fun time for you, and totally reasonable side-effects for everyone else. Not that the realization will help her."Eeeeeeheeheeheeheheeheeeee." You giggle insanely to yourself, rubbing your hands with all the subtlety of a Bond villain. You slowly turn your manic gaze on Illiana, swiveling your head around like some sort of creepy, broken wind-up owl. Illiana, to her credit, backs up against the wall. It will buy her a few more seconds of Lincoln-free meddling."Illliiiiiaaaaaaaaaanaaaaaaa......." You sing softly, eyes blazing wide and full of insanity. You get a gulp back in reply. "I think you may be able to do something to get us out of this terrible predicament we find ourselves in." Your grin somehow grows even wider.
"W-W-W-W-What!? N-N-No! No no no! Y-You keep your hands to yourself!" Illiana stammers in near-panic, pressing herself against the wall of the mausoleum as if hoping she can just melt through them. You merely chuckle as you saunter over to her, eyes locked onto the instrument of your salvation.Dem fluffy tails."Now, now, Illiana. I'm not going to do anything bad, or destructive, or anything of the sort. I just need your help with something." You attempt to sound reasonable in your tone. You fail miserably."L-L-Lincoln, w-whatever you're up to, d-d-don't you dare involve meeeeeEEEEEEEEEP!!!" Illiana's protests fly up several octaves into a shriek as you suddenly lunge the rest of the distance between the two of you, seizing her tails in a loving embrace and instantly beginning to run your hands through the fluffy goodness."Fluuuuuuffffyyyyyyyy......" You croon, slightly delirious at the cuddly touch of the foxgirl's tails. A foxgirl who currently has bitten down on the loose arm sleeve of her robe-top-thing, strangling back a whimper at the unexpected ministrations. Her tails jerk and flick to and fro at the continuous touching...........which means this idea is TOTALLY going to work.
"Well, Illiana. The way I see it, you got some pretty nice tails here." The inari lets out a cross between a squeak and a moan as you slide your finger lightly from the base to the tip of her middle tail, your grin turning into a smirk at the sound. "Sensitive, too.""S-S-Sto---T-T-This isn't---Nnnnnghh!" Illiana weakly pleads, only to be cut off by flicking the tips of her three tails in rapid succession, the subsequent spasms thwacking you in the face with surprising force."And quite strong, at that! So, here's what we're going to do. I figure if I touch your tails like this....""Hyaaaah!""And then I stroke like this.....""Ngghaaahnnnn....""And then twiddle just a teensy bit right here.....""MmmnnnnNNNN!!""And then repeat ad infinitum in rapid succession.... ""HNNNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAA!!" Illiana, finally pushed to the limit of her self-control, lets out a guilty, primal cry of pleasure, going rigid and squeezing her eyes shut as her usual composed demeanor is betrayed by the tongue hanging just slightly out of her mouth.
Most interesting though, is that due to your carefully placed caresses, her tails spin around in circles at a ridiculously fast rate, fire spluttering from the tips as the rotation is actually strong enough to lift the orgasming inari off the ground.Grinning like a budding mad scientist getting to meet Nikolai Tesla, you enact the final part of your plan: giving the temporarily hovering foxgirl a push in the right direction.By applying a gentle amount of finger pressure to a location that you're pretty sure someone from her background has not considered toying with.The inari, though still brain-addled from the orgasm, lets out a shriek of shock, her tails going absolutely haywire as she lurches forward towards the opposite wall of the mausoleum to crash into with muffled thud that actually shakes the structure noticeably. She slides to the ground with a dazed and dumbstruck look on her face, tails still flailing like possessed fluffy tentacles. She stares blankly at you, either unwilling or unable to comprehend what just happened and how many different ways that counts as so wrong. Or in your opinion, so right.
You, on the other hand, are currently examining the interesting effects of the ROFLFOXCOPTER OF LOVE. Namely, that some of the wall crypts had their aging stone crumble at the impact, with three on the left side of the room and two on the right side having the darkness of their insides exposed to ambient light drifting through the window. Is it night? You really can't tell anymore; you've never kept any sort of time besides "time to drink" and "time to find more booze".You also notice that the large stone coffin in the middle of the chamber had its lid shifted by the tremor, even if only slightly.You FURTHER notice that Illiana's face is starting to settle on indignant rage as the proper reaction, so you maaaaaay want to hurry up and make some sort of decision before she turns you to cinders.>What do?[ ] [check on Fritz at the door][ ] [check the left crypts][ ] [check the right crypts][ ] [check stone coffin][ ] [deal with angry foxgirl][ ] [other]
>>23086138See? This is why I tell all you people who drawfag not to worry so much about what I will find desirable. You're all more talented than you know. Plus, I love seeing the different interpretations on Lincoln's appearance.You want to see shitty drawfaggotry? Look at the terrible Paint monstrosity I threw up for a twitter avatar. It's incredibly annoying to have an awesome image stuck in your head due to the sheer level of derp your hands have.>>23086816I believe it's an M1A2.
>>23087444hey it's still better than I could do back when I started to draw stuff.
>>23087393>[ ] [deal with angry foxgirl]>[ ] [check stone coffin]
Rolled 17>>23087393>[x] [check on Fritz at the door]>[x] [other]=[boast about your incredible discovery]>[x] [check stone coffin]>>23087444>Look at the terrible Paint monstrosity I threw up for a twitter avatar.Was wondering about that.Is that a collar or a mustache?
>>23087497It's supposed to be a collar. You know how everyone has their own idea of, if they could get away with wearing badass clothing, what they would wear around?Mine would probably a t-shirt and jeans (because I am a lazy bastard), but supplemented with an awesome hat and a massive billowy trench coat with a collar big enough to, when combined with the hat, obscure the majority of my face. Maybe a ridiculously long scarf wrapped around the collar for good measure for extra billowy bits.This is as much for practical purposes as stylistic ones. Seriously, do you know how hard it is to be devious when your want to break into a maniacal grin most of the time? I am not good at controlling facial expressions.
Maybe I'll switch out the hat for a crown made of a bucket and a trash can lid if I need to assert my Kingly Authority.
>>23087632I can see your point there. Whilst I don't really pay much attention to fashion, I do pay attention to my clothing.I am actually hell-bent on wearing my ankle-length leather coat, as it serves me well even at summer. Considering I also wear sunglasses nearly 24/7 (Though that is because photophobia) it does manage to look cool. Or at least that's what I like to think.Which is why I spent literally half of my time as an artist drawings coats of all shapes and sizes. They look kickass and cover most of those dreadful anatomy pieces, so they're also practical.
>>23087731Fashion? Fashion is no friend to badass clothing."No, Hobo King, exoskeletons are NOT the newest trend! No, Hobo King, man-portable miniguns do NOT count as accessories! No, Hobo King, all clothes do NOT look better with the addition of lasers!"Pah. Plebeians.
>>23087792I know right? everyone know exoskeletons are the newest badass clothing trend! I mean trench coats and dusters are nice and all but after a while they get a bit boring
>>23087792Eh, exoskeletons are a very niche "sci-fi military chic" look. >>23087393[X]Deal with the Angry Foxgirland[X]Check the open coffin.
>>23087792The trench coat goes OVER the exoskeleton.Brilliance. Vodka sandwiches for everyone!
>>23087867Then my idea of drawing a coat that is ALSO as skeleton isn't as strange as I thought. Good to know.
>>23087867>>23087902I am now imagining a trench coat with integral servoassist exoskeleton, styled on the exterior as an actual skeleton-skeleton. It looks awesome in my head. Y'all rock.
>>23087393[x] Shoot Iliana a thumb's up[x] Check stone coffinThere's gotta be something good in there, right?
Rolled 84>>23088139maybe a new team member?
>>23087867Okay I immediately thought of the ranger armor from Fallout: New Vegas when you said that.
>>23088271New Vegas Elite Ranger armor with a more cybernetic appearance and more of the exoskeleton covered is how I think of it.Either way, badass.
>>23091454Did someone say 'New Vegas Elite Ranger armor with a more cybernetic appearance and more of the exoskeleton covered'?Excuse me, I've got some drawing to attend to.
>>23087372>>23087381HK YOURE BACK!AND FOX GIRL AVIONICS.will draw after my professor strangles me for being late for the nth time.
HK, i've whipped up a little something for you. sorry about the eyes.. i couldn't get them right and just pasting the ones i put on there on it doesn't really help the problem...but either way, it is a start.what kind of alterations would you like? if it is not obvious, i have tried to re-do your twitter profile pic...
>>23087393[x] [check stone coffin]After this, who else wants to just plow the tank through waves corpses as me blast War Machine over the external speakers, all the way to the temple?
>>23087393Check everything, and Distract Angry Foxgirl with either findings or whispered promises of teaching her the secrets to the Tail-Helicopter technique, obviously in conjunction with Hobo-Happy-Time...
[x] [check stone coffin]could be a way undergroundwhich really doesn't make sense since there will be more of them down there, guaranteed.
>>23087393>[ x] [check on Fritz at the door]>[ x] [check stone coffin]>[ x] [deal with angry foxgirl]
Wooooo, day is over and not a Monday class in sight! Now I can actually get more typing done.
Rolled 9Fritz is a bro, we should check on him.
Rolled 1Holy shit, have we only rolled one single d20 since the last update?LET'S RECTIFY THIS SITUATION.
Rolled 5, 8, 15, 9, 5, 5, 6, 17, 18, 11, 5, 10, 16, 16, 8, 13, 18, 2, 19, 5 = 211>>23098413the vore is strong in this one
Rolled 16>>23098421Naturally. I WAS trying to rectify the situation, after all.
Rolled 15>>23098413SHIT.Save us, o' Changer of Ways!
>>23098413Before you can decide on a course of action (by not deciding on one at all), you hear a distinct groaning sound coming from behind you. With an abrupt about-face, you find yourself looking at a rather concerned Fritz, and a set of doors starting to break away from the hinges."There's....no....holding them, dammit! We're out of time! We need an exit, NOW!" Fritz shouts at you with as much urgency as he can put into his voice. Illiana, her rage forgotten for the moment in favor of going pale, scrambles up from the floor, directing a similar pleading look at you.....FUCK. They expect you to make a decision? NOW!?Oh fuck it, looks like you'll just have beat a hasty exit like you have so many times before.>[roll 1d6 for quick crypt searching]
Rolled 14>>23098786>and then we rolled nothing but 9s
Rolled 4>>23098820SAVE US BASED /TG/ DICE GODS!
Rolled 3>headitem carefullyYes, Lincoln! Use that head item of yours carefully!
Rolled 5Save us from your wayward children Papa Nurgle!
Rolled 1>>23098820have mercy upon a weary hobo of merciful dice gods
Rolled 1>>23098957>not invoking Slaanesh
Rolled 3WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.
Rolled 1ALL THESE ONES, GOD DAAAAAAAAAAMN
Rolled 2>>23098972never rely on Slaanesh to do anything.you should have put you're faith in a worthier god of caos. HAIL KHORN! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!
OH FUCK ME
As much as I enjoy seeing you all panic, I feel the need to remind you that you ARE rolling d6s.
Rolled 2>>23098820Holy Hobo of the gods! In whose hands are held awesomeness and intoxication.... SAVE OUR LAZY ASSES!
>>23099032...So the ones don't count? For vore anyway.
Rolled 3Dammit Lincoln! Just man up and save your own ass!
>>23099159hail the changer of ways
Rolled 2>>23098963>>23098972>>23099010You motherfuckers.
Rolled 6>>23099765its just d6'sp.s. slow thread is slow
>>23100166>Hobo King>actually updatingPick one.
Fell asleep, woke up to finish post, then will finish sleeping.We're about to get to a good part, I promise.
>>23101444I don't believe you
Well, there's a horde of magical flesh-chomping zombies, skeletons, and ghouls literally breaking down the doors to get ahold of you. Mortal peril is imminent......Which means there's no better time than to grave-rob like a motherfucker! As if there was ever any doubt of the best use of your time.Ignoring any stray urges to think (despite the ever-increasing throb of pain at the corners of your mind), you rush towards the three open crypts on the left, tearing away stone fragments in a wild, rushed attempt to grab whatever you can before the shit hits the fan.The first two crypts yield nothing but a handful of dust and bone fragments; you hurl them away from you. The third crypt, however, yields a finger bone with a golden, gem-encrusted ring on it. You dutifully shove the entire thing in one of the many now-empty pockets, dead people bit and all.But before you can proceed to move towards the two rightmost crypts, a combination of a screech and a grinding noise lets you know that you're out of time. Fritz leaps away from the makeshift barricade as it begins to give way, the doors lurching inward as limbs reach through the fresh gaps in the masonry. Illiana shrieks as, with a shatter and tinkling of glass, more limbs are thrust through the window on the opposing wall.
Staving off panic at the thought of getting eaten before you can drink again, you hurl your body against the stone coffin, now the only potential way out of this mess. Gritting your teeth as you heave the lid off the coffin with a grinding of stone, you say a quick prayer to the booze gods that creepy mausoleums in abandoned magic wastelands work how they're SUPPOSED to: at least one secret passage per spooky building.A massive crash shakes the chamber as the lid of the coffin, MUCH heavier than Illiana, smashes into the floor, leaving a noticeable dent and a spiderweb of cracks where it impacted. Peering inside the coffin, you come face to face with.........A SKELETON! The remains of the dead, lying in repose! Oh, the horror, the horr---"NOPE." You utter, grabbing the human remains by the ribcage and heaving them clear over your shoulder across the room. Bones clatter everywhere as you casually desecrate the grave of someone you give absolutely zero shits about.Instead, you grab the M14 EBR from around you shoulder and begin ramming the butt of it into the bottom of the stone coffin, now feeling slightly unhinged considered the amount of shots Fritz is taking at the oncoming horde. You have to be right. You HAVE to. GODDAMNIT, SECRET PASSAGE, WHERE THE HELL-------with a thud and a click, the entire bottom of the coffin swings downwards, revealing a staircase into a dark and murky gloom.
"HA! I WIN AGAIN, COMMON SENSE!" You scream, scrambling over the edge of the coffin and half-falling down the stairs in your haste to get away from the Lincoln-caused horde of undead. Illiana is quick to follow, with Fritz bringing up the rear as he continues to try to thin the crowd as much as possible. Upon clearing the trapdoor, he grabs the dangling slab of stone and heaves it upwards, locking it back into place with a click.You all sit on the stairs panting for a solid minute. "Suck it, Indiana Jones." You mutter, pumping your fist slightly.....Of course, now you're stuck in absolutely blackness on a set of stairs that goes fuck-knows-where, with no way back, and the ever-present threat of sobriety weighing on your mind.......You being wondering how morally reprehensible it would be to murder your companions and fashion a makeshift still of some sort from their remains. Hypothetically speaking, of course........Of course.....WELL, HOW 'BOUT THEM STAIRS THEN.>[Roll 2d20 to not fall down stairs, continued alcohol withdrawal resist]
Rolled 12, 4 = 16>>23101464Stairs THIS SHALL BE OUR FINAL BATTLE!
Rolled 7, 16 = 23>>23101464Oh boy, time for some 1s
Rolled 12, 3 = 15>>23101464SURF DOWN THEM ON THE SKELETON!!!or use Illiana Tail-copter...btw HK, what did you think of >>23093438 ?
>>23101586Just make the eyes lines with half circles attached to the bottom. Other than that? I LOVE IT.
Rolled 20, 7, 3 = 30>>23101464first two dice for stairs, 3rd for light source, booze + Illiana's tails + groping Illiana's tits = FIRE, there you go, light source, suck it darkness
Rolled 18, 10 = 28>>23101464I find it ominous that we're basically rolling down the stairs here.
Rolled 12, 13 = 25>>23101594Did you want a bit of hair sticking out from under the hat or no?
>>23101695Sure, why not?
>>23101699here ye go.
>>23101723HUZZAH, IMPROVED PICTURE.
Rolled 20, 13 = 33>>23101464Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeestairs!!!
Rolled 14, 14 = 28>>23101464you mean to tell me our dear hobo who is a MASTER of liberating small things has not "liberated" a single lighter? not one single BiC?i..i just dont know anymore..
Rolled 14, 2 = 16>>23102520who needs a lighter when you have MINI-BOOZE!!!also, with 2 nat20s, we must somehow seduce the Stairs with our Hobo-Swag...
Rolled 17, 15 = 32...Rolling for stair vore-!
Rolled 12, 3 = 15>>23101464TIME FOR HIGH ROLLER
We could always use MASTER LOCKPICK.
Rolled 17, 12 = 29>>23101464Rolling for awesome
Two twenties, but not a single one........what are you up to, /tg/ dice.
Rolled 17, 2 = 19>>23104818Well, let's see if I can't bring out the HUEHUEHUE.
Rolled 14, 15 = 29>>23104818Maybe they're just amused this thread has been going on for about two days?
>>23105429But these threads ALWAYS go on for days.......
>>23105489It's a very unique quest in that sense.
Using your hands to brace yourself against the sides (or what you assume are the sides) of the pitch-black staircase, you slowly feel your way down the steps with a surprising amount of dexterity.Unfortunately, this brief period of coordination ends when you are hit by a sudden burst of nausea, and you proceed to crash your way down the stairs in a much more typical display of Hobo Coordination. With a muffled crash, you come to a halt in a crumpled heap at the apparent bottom."Lincoln!? What happened!?" Illiana cries out, voice slightly tinged with hysterics. Not surprising, considering how close you all came to getting devoured."Why did nobody warn me about staaaaaaiiiirs......." You groan, pain and the threat of withdrawal battling for dominance inside your brain.This is getting worse by the second. You may still have a considerable amount of alcohol in your system (as evidenced by the lack of serious injuries caused by your rapid roll down the stone steps), but there's no fooling your own brain. The damnable organ knows that sobriety is coming, and you can barely think with all the pre-emptive screaming it's doing.With shaky limbs, you haul yourself to your unsteady feet, bracing an arm against the wall.........only to have your hand come down on something distinctly dry and spindly.
"GAH FUCK WOAH!" You scream, hurling yourself back against the opposite wall. It takes you a few moments to realize that you are not, in fact, being faceraped by some sort of horrible crunchy spider monstrosity or something."Uhhhhh, can we get a little light down here?" You call up to your companions, and are rewarded by a click and a bright beam as Fritz turns on the flashlight mounted on his rifle.Directing your attention at the wall, you see that what you had grabbed was a wooden torch of some sort, set into a sconce on the stone bricks."Oi, Illiana. Can you light this torch?" You call to the inari as she and Fritz descend the stairs."......sure." The foxgirl replies grudgingly, having calmed down enough to remember that she's pissed at you. You wince at the withering glare she throws you as the magical flame wisps from the end of one of her tails to ignite the bundle of kindling. You get the feeling you're going to have to work a lot harder for foxgirl sexytimes for not getting the chance to deal with it immediately. But.....there were zombies! Not fair.
Oh well. You've talked your way out of worse situations. Like that time with the SWAT team, the elementary school, and that suitcase you found in a dumpster with all the weird electronics and Cyrillic text in it.Grabbing the now-crackling torch from its resting place, you take stock of your surroundings. The hallway is relatively narrow, the stones musty with age and decay. As are the skulls. Yes, the skulls, the ones set into the wall at regular intervals, the ones that have been set in position to look as if they're screaming. Charming.The torch only illuminates so far, and the hallway is long enough that it fades into blackness at the edge of the corona of light your torch is throwing off. Fritz directs the beam of his flashlight down the hallway, but even it only gets so far before it yields to the shadows.So creepy. So disturbing. So....so.....".....This is SO AWESOME!" You squeal with glee, impending apocalyptic withdrawal forgotten for the moment. Now THIS is what you were talking about! Secret passages, zombie chase scenes, mystical forces of darkness, yadda yadda yadda, the whole nine yards. You don't want to rule over a fantasy world that's BORING.
Unfortunately, your shout seems to have notified some unwanted pursuers, as you hear thumping coming back up from the stone trapdoor."....Maaaaaaaybe we should get going....." You casually comment, staring nervously back up at the barrier between you and being devoured.>[ERROR: //LOW INTOXICATION LEVELS//..........USER INTERFACE MALFUNCTION//...]>What do?
Rolled 13, 14 = 27>>23107486>EMERGENCY>Carefully lick minislime for the smallest alcohol boost>Apologize afterwards
>>23107486>To clarify: It means you don't get any pre-suggested options until you get more booze in your system.
>>23107486>make way down hall way>imbibe minibooze
>>23107486OVERRIDE COMMAND: PROCEED DOWN DARK HALL.SECONDARY DIRECTIVE: LICK WALLS IN HOPES OF IMBIBING SOME FORM OF HALLUCINOGENIC SLIME.
Sorry guys, currently cleaning my apartment building for company and shit.Hopefully it won't take too long.
>>23108443I second this notion.
cleanliness is only two away from Lincoln-nessfor those not getting it; Cleanliness<Godliness<Lincoln-ness>>23107486"Fritz...." said in a sing-songy voice "do you have any C4?"if no; "Oh Phooey" then continue down the path to Adventureif yes; "Do you think the Zombies have heavy excevation equipment?"if yes; "Well, there goes that plan" and continue down the path to Adventureif no; "Could we set some up in the tunnel, and turn it into a dead end for them? or even better, ON them?"if no; "Are you sure?" (repeat ad infinitum until our plan is accepted)if yes; blow a section of tunnel and continue on the path to Adventure.
inb4 Lincoln turns to a completely different persona with a completely elegant gentleman and a tactical genius.who loves tea.and is completely serious 24/7hm.. i think it would explain some things,given he is using his skills subconsciously.
>>23107486>Head down creepy tunnel of AWESOMENESS>if crypt with no way out, RAID THE CORPSES AGAIN!>if exit to freedom, (glorious freedom!) praise the booze gods and run like the sneaky bastard ya are.>if neither, then keep going until SOMETHING happens. >if meet up with undead.... then use the power of your hobo-someness to ram through them with your fists and guns. what could go wrong?
Alright, THAT took fucking forever. I can actually get back to work now......Consensus seems to be firmly centered on "shenanigans". I shall writefag accordingly.
I miss hosehead. I'm going to give him a call when my seeds come in the mail.
>>23113855question; Would having a Standard Opening Image, or a logo in conjunction with a story relevant image be something people might want? or does no one care?
And in the latest of my terrible hasty decisions, I bought a keg for no apparent reason.Mardi Gras is wonderful.
>>23115433Lincoln made you do it.
Would someone archive this? I'd appreciate it and I will promise a string of consecutive updates when I finish entertaining my guests in return. YES, I am actually capable of it, I swear.
>>23116145I don't believe you
>>23118060Nobody believes him, he's probably already drunk.We'll still wait patiently.
>>23118107I am baffled by the idea that you would ever think I am NOT drunk, honestly.
>>23118319>NOT drunkThis alien concept confuses and terrifies me.
>>23118378Me too, Anon.Let us pray it soon ends
>>23118319Mostly it was a comment on how drunk people will say anything and never really mean it.
>>23118319well, it has been established that you Are actually Lincoln as both your levels of inebriation are entwined, so since you have procured more liquor, Lincoln must have found some morsel of the stuff...
Rolled 14Yay, back to hoboquest!And I leave again tomorrow FUCK.My two cents worth [X] do the makarena to search pockets for booze.
[x] give in to the change.