...I need to go paint some more Orks. That lone Trukkboy I've finished needs the rest of his Mob done.

...jesus, /tg/...what the fuck?
You know what?
Payback

>>6018394
Part 2

Oh god, the cockney accents.

D:

>>6018394
FFFFFFFFFFFFFF-
Goddammit /tg/!

>>6018090
"Because in the grim darkness of the far future

dere's only war

and sometimes yer drinkin buddies dont make it back"

I feel this is oddly appropriate...

A waaagh lands on a desolate necron tombworld, and the soulless automatons quickly arise to eradicate the infestation. Every single one of the boyz is vaporized, and sterilization fields are activated that kill off even the spores. But through mutation and sheer luck, one spore is unaffected by the sterilizing fields. A single Ork is born.

He acquires a choppa and pistol from the ruins of the orc's encampment, but there aren't any boyz to be found. The ork looks about uncertainly, then smiles and with a tentative "waagh!" runs off in a random direction- the boyz left without him, so he'll just have to track them down.

He wanders the dusty wastes for weeks. Once he sees smoke, but it turns out to be the remnants of some spilt fuel containers. He plays with the fire for a while, but moves on- after all, the real fun will be when he catches up with the boyz.

Then, to his joy, he finds one of the entrances to the necrons tombs. Down in the vaults, he gazes across row after row of inert warrior. He runs through the halls for a while, roaring and firing his bolter, trying to liven the place up a little. Eventually he walks over and punches one of the warriors in the shoulder; it simply tips over. The tomb remains inert.

Since he's the biggest, the orc figures it's his job to whip these funny-lookin boyz into shape. He gathers a bunch of them together in a pile, then stacks a few more to form a nearby podium. Standing on it, the ork gives a rousing speech about how this is a sorry lot but he'll get them shipshape soon enough. He tries all sort of things to get a waagh going- insults, violence, praise and flattery. . .He tries hobbling around on folded knees, thinking that if he's smaller someone else might go and do a better job of starting a waaagh.

Eventually he goes up on the surface again. He heads off and eventually manages to find the camp. Nothing there has changed. He grabs up as much dakka and choppa as he can carry and hauls it with him as he spends several weeks looking until he finds the tomb entrance again. Staggering over to where all his boyz are, he dumps the huge assortment of weaponry down and looks up hopefully. The moment stretches out as he stands there, looking on with a tentative smile. Eventually he starts picking up choice bits of weaponry and offering them to the necron warriors. None show any signs of interest.

He tries fitting in for a little while, by standing in the same posture and not moving. He pretends to leave and then sneaks back and peeks around the corner to see if they move.

He wants to fight with somebody, just once. He wants to get shot up, to ride shotgun, hooting and hollering. He wants to meet a weirdboy or a nob or a dok. He wants to chant and pound the ground in unison with a massive crowd, to sail through the stars to a new world, to play catch with another ork using gretchins.

Just once, he wants to hear somebody call him something. Just one time; then he'd have a name.

He wishes he knew why the boyz left him behind.

He knows he'll find them. Some day...

Dude . . . . seriously.

>>6018487
Oh god. Not this. Anything but this. That poor Ork.

>>6018503
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Man this is a seriously sad thread.

This is the worst possible thing to happen to an ork.

The lone resistant ork could spread his spores, which would also be resistant to to the fields. In a couple weeks he'd be surrounded by boyz.

>>6018573
yeah but hes got the agnoy of being all alone for weeks

>>6018573

Orks spread their spores when they die.

>>6018596
Or when there fighting, He's got nothing to fight, and nothing to kill him.

>>6018596
The spores are released throughout their lives, theres just a massive surge when they die.

He's sterile.

>>6018615
Death orgasm?

>>6018573
Only when they fight, or die.
He'll live and die alone.

40k is horrible to everyone - even those who love war.

The mutation was that he started growing faster. When the sterilization field was activated he was already too big for it to kill him

He would have been a really good ork because of it. Big and strong, everybody woulda liked him. And then one day he'd get to be so big that he'd be the warboss, and he'd lead his loyal hordes on waagh after fantastic waagh. He'd be great at it.

And then one day he'd get to be so big that he'd be the warboss, and he'd lead his loyal hordes on waagh after fantastic waagh. He'd be great at it.

he'd be the warboss, and he'd lead his loyal hordes on waagh after fantastic waagh. He'd be great at it.

He'd be great at it.

oh no...
nonononononononononono

>>6018507

Dat poor boy...

>>6018573
Nope - the enemy sterilized the fields.
He was the only one who made it, but he can't make new ones - he will never meet other of his kind.

>>6018487
>>6018503

Reading this just makes me feel sadder than it should. Damn you, I'm getting all teary eyes over the thought of a single lonesome ork.

It was raining. The guardsmen's body fell dead into the mud, a syringe squig sticking stiffly in its torso.

"Dat's da last wunnov'em..." Guznit leaned against the sedated ork's body, sliding to the ground. The grot orderly's breath came in labored gasps, a jagged piece of shrapnel stuck out between his ribs. He clutched the last remaining syringe squig in his hand. The squig blinked its little beady eyes against the rain. Guznit felt his hands tremble, he felt so tired, so cold. "Can't be nappin on da job, Doc Garsnik is countin' on me..." Guznit's head bobbed gently against the sedated ork's breathing, "You'z countin' on me," he tried to say, but it came out as a garbled wheez, flecks of blood stained his lips. Guznit told his legs to stand, but they lay unnoving like little green twigs stuck in the mud.

He stared up at the sky.

A lazy overcast gray all the way to the horizon, rain drizzling down. For some reason beyond the understanding of the little grot, Guznit remembered the first day he met the doc in that dusty alley so seemingly long ago. The rain was salty on his lips. Unremarkable to the eyes of any casual observer, but at that moment to Guznit's, it was... He worked his tiny mind to think of the right word...

It was pretty.

...

I wuz der' da day my Warboss made iz name,
I wuz der' wif' 'im on da' charge dat gave 'im fame,
But I did not see da end o' dat charge, nor da victoary won,
I fell along da way, ya see, an me not da onlee wun,
Nows weeb awl lie 'ere,
Waitin' fer anuther go.

I watcheded da boys sqwaak an shout an celebrate da win,
I watcheded as da WAAAGH!! partieded until da lite woz dim,
But I did nub join da ruckus, nor laff da nite away,
And I cud onlee watch wen da boys left da next day,
I guess we'll awl godda catch up,
Wen we git anuther go.

I saw sum more boys cumz along, but they woz not mine,
I saw dim take an nick our weapons an awl da gubbinz they cud find,
But I did not tell dim ter stop, nor try ter stop deir krew,
And awl I did was watch wen dey took mi shoota an mi burna too,
Ow are we s'posed to WAAAGH!!,
If we git anuther go?

I waited fer a long, long time, but stuff jus' stayed da same,
Meeb waited until da Umies 'rivved an I thoght at last da time had came,
But I did nub rize ter fight 'em, nor any o' da boys around me too,
An I watcheded as da boyz burned away wen da Umies burnas came thruu,
Den I thoght it,
Maybe....Maybe there won't be anuvva go.

I'm pretty sure we've got some Noh BAW moments hidden away somewhere on suptg...

oh goddammit /tg/ you are NOT going to make me feel sorry for some Orks of all things.

>>6018855oh goddammit /tg/ you are NOT going to make me feel sorry for some Orks of all things.


"Don't waaagh fer me lads, I iz already krump'd"

"BOSS!!!!"

Before, I felt nothing for orks. Bloodthirsty barbarians, all of them... But now, I feel compassion for those big green bastards. Thank you, /tg/.

>>6018817

>Noh baw moments

NO

NO FUCK YOU /tg/

YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT SHIT EXISTS. NO, DON'T YOU FUCKING EVEN INSINUATE IT. FUCK YOU ALL

>>6019312
It involves her losing the ability to think for herself, btw.
Want it posted?

>>6019374

...yes, please.

I don't.
Jesus christ, people - it's NOH we're talking about here.

>>6019607

What can I say, human curiousity is both a useful and terrible thing.

Pic related, it will undoubtably me a half hour after reading whatever the Noh baw material is.

NOH DESERVES TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND PURE AND LOVED, DAMMIT

SHE'S LIKE YATSUBA

DON'T YOU DARE DEFILE HER ;_;

>>6019652
Where...where was she?
She couldn't remember a thing.

As she looked around, she saw that she was tied up, besides her own items.

Besides that, nothing else could really be seen.

"Ah, there you are, tool."

She froze, before slowly turning to look at whoever talked to her.
Don't say I didn't warn you, /tg/...

>>6019712
Before her, a man with a long white beard stood, smiling at her, though the smile never reached his chilling eyes.

"I must say I'm dissapointed in you - here I go and leave you alone for a year, and you get into the messy habit of having a free will."

Now, the smile reached his eyes.

"But, well, that's nothing some work won't fix, of course."

>>6019712

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

This isn't the pasta.

The pasta I remember involves the party dying and begging Noh to show the slightest amount of emotion.

All she does is stare at them and states "please do not take these items" as they're slaughtered in front of her.

>>6019742
With that, he began to throw something that looked like silver around her in a circle.

This was bad.

She tried to struggle, tried to get out of the chair and back to her family.

They were important.

As she continued to struggle, the old man finished up the circle of silver.

Her f...
F...
What was the word?

She had learned it a while ago, when she was hug-
H-
What...what was happening?

>>6019766
Well, guess we've got different pasta then.
Feel free to post the one you're talking about.


>>6019781
"Well then, tool" the old man (who was he again? seemed important...) walked towards a table which suddenly appeared

"Let's get to remove some more waste of space"

He said this like a cherished grandfather (grandfather? what was that word?) would during the chilling winter months as he handed them each a present (what was a "present"?) to play with.

>>6019833
"...no"

The old man ignored her, taking out an ancient book ("book"?) to use, flipped through it and found what he was looking for.

"Please...don't"
"Very good, tool - you're already doing what you were made to, without me even having to use my power...it just needs some a small adjustment to be complete"

With that, a blinding light was suddenly in his hand, while the old man walked forward and bent down, touching the silver circle.

"This should be good enough"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>>6019878
As his hand touched the circle, it suddenly lit up, as she began to desperately get away.

She...wasn't entirely sure why she wanted to leave anymore, but it had to be important.
Had to.
Right?

A brief image of someone, she wasn't sure who, giving her those items that she was to protect.
Why would someone do that?
It made no sense...

After all, they weren't supposed to take those items at all.

Sergeant-Major Briggs watched the dark shadows of the land pass by. There was no moon tonight.
The only illumination in the rear of the Valkyrie was the glowing tip of his cigar. Further forward the pilot would have his displays lit up, hidden from prying eyes by the darkened canopy glass. Seventeen other Valkyries were scattered across the sky in loose formation, hugging the contours of the ground as they fled from the rising sun.
To the south-east Briggs could see the occasional flash of ordnance and the millions of dancing lights from the secondary line of the Imperial Forces retreating from Dallopolis.
The squad was silent. Everyone knew what they were there for and the hardened Stormtroopers were too battle hardened to express the tension no doubt gnawing at each of them.

>>6019912
She gathered everything she had left, and forced out a final sentence

"Please...don't take-"

Before she could finish however, the silver circle became brighter, blinding her as she tried to speak, removing parts of her forever.

"-these items"

~Fin~

Maybe not the highest quality, but sufficiently depressing, I'd say.

>>6019652
FUCK you.
Are you happy now?

Someone counter this and post a happy Noh story!

“Fifteen minutes to LZ.” the pilot said over the comm. Briggs regarded the remaining three inches of his cigar before tossing it out into the slipstream. They were close now. Close enough for the Tau long-range sniffers and sensors to detect even the tiny glow of a cigar tip in the visual spectrum.
The flight banked around various jutting hilltops and began their beeline approach towards the hunched promethium refineries dominating the western reaches of Dallopolis. The cigar fell away towards the ground like a tiny orbital strike.

These texts would even make a dark apostle sad.

Well written, anon.

Briggs checked that the sickle pattern magazine for his bolt pistol was feeding correctly by pressing down on the top bolt-round. It depressed slightly against the spring then returned to it's position; Briggs always loaded 7 rounds into his 8 round magazines. The springs were apt to become over stressed and weak, causing critical jams at exactly the wrong times. Briggs was one round short of a full load in any given engagement but in fifteen years of service to the Inquisition he'd never suffered a stoppage during combat.
He slammed the magazine into place and chambered a round. He then pulled the charging lever back a few centimetres, assured by the glint of brass that the bolt was indeed in the correct place.
He sat back and took a deep breath.
“Three minutes.”

At that moment the Tau woke up to the presence of the Valkyrie flight.
Bright blue beams from ion cannons and the searing streaks of energy from their infernal railguns launched into the sky abruptly. The lead Valkyrie was destroyed outright by a railgun shot that passed directly through it's fuel tank, blossoming into a ball of flame.
The Valkyries launched flares and chaff, banking and jinking wildly as the unguided rounds continued to spit out from the hidden Tau defences sitting amongst the Imperial city buildings.They were followed by seeker missiles that rose like predatory seas creatures from the urban sprawl and rocketed out towards the incoming aircraft. Many, despite the heathen alien technology guiding them, were fooled by the chaff and flares. Others missed as the pilots displayed their brilliant abilities and outmanoeuvred the tiny projectiles.
But at least three struck their targets. Briggs distinctly saw the Valkyrie closest to them lose it's tail fins and spiral down out of control. Centrifugal force launched a Stormtrooper free of the falling aircraft.
Briggs winced as a railgun round intercepted the flailing man and obliterated him. A stain of pink mist drifted away on the morning breeze.

The eighteen valkryies were down to fourteen. That meant they'd already sustained fourty casualties, no including the crew of the Valkyries, before the mission had even technically begun.
They had one hundred and fourty lives left to spend in this fight.
Briggs gripped his bolt pistol as the pilot, breathless now, announced “One minute! Sixty seconds!”
Small arms fire now began to spray up towards them from the Fire Warriors surrounding the Tau command centre. The distinctly alien structure, built over the ruins of the last Adeptus Arbites precinct to fall in Dollopolis, was surrounded by ranks upon ranks of xenos habitents. They had cleared the landing pads of wreckage and where proud Imperial flyers had once rested alien Skyrays and Hammerheads squatted.
The very sight of the filthy alien technology filled Briggs with rage.
His heart sang and he mentally praised the Emperor's name as the Valkyries came into range and unloaded their payloads of missiles and spat lascannon rounds into the enemy.
More Imperial ordnance screamed in past them as the Thunderbolt fighters, stooping from the very atmoshperic roof of the planet on full throttle, unloaded their own missiles and las rounds. Many of them broke off and ran for home immediately whilst other came around, hunting for more targets. A few completely overshot or were struck by Tau fire and became weapons in their own right.

>>6019934
Is this going to be a sad story, or what?
I don't want more after the Noh one...

“Thirty seconds! Prepare! Prepare!” the pilot all but yelled.
So close that they could make out details of the Fire Warriors sprinting towards their defences. Three more Valkyries were destroyed messily.
Another Valkyrie, just about to make touchdown in Production Plaza in front of of Brigg's own transport, was struck hard by a pair of railgun rounds. They tore through the structure of the Valkyrie and managed to avoid blowing any munitions. The drop ship fell to pieces, however, spilling Stormtroopers from it to fall the last thirty metres to earth.
Briggs gritted his teeth and tensed up as they neared the ground.
Almost. Almost there.
A pulse rifle round punched through the deck and through Vasquez's helmet. His brains splashed up onto the roof of the cabin.
None of the other Stormtroopers flinched.
“Man down,” Briggs said calmly. “Taking fire.”
“Ten seconds!” the pilot replied, before screaming in agonising pain.

>>6019978

The Tau manning the gate towers were being kept suppressed by the covering fire of the advancing Stormtroopers and the hail of autocannon fire from three Valkyries.
Briggs' squad wasn't the first to reach the gates. That honour went to Sergeant Mensk.
Mensk died shortly after achieving that honour at the hands of a Kroot mercenary. His squad was summarily cut to pieces by the ravenous aliens even as they cut down the beaked aliens with their hellguns.
As the last member of Mensk's squad expired the timers on the demo charges they had scattered throughout the gate ran down to zero.
They exploded.
Briggs led his men through the billowing smoke cloud. Fire Warriors and Kroot staggered through the haze, blinded and shellshocked. The Stormtroopers dropped them with disciplined double-taps.
“The command centre!” Briggs yelled, pointing with his chainsword, “We take that and it's all over! Charge!”

The Stormtroopers broke into a run. They mostly ignored the barrage of pulse rifle fire spraying out amongst them, though some of them slowed to take shots at anything too threatening.
Briggs heard the whine of thrusters and glanced up.
“Cover! Scatter now!” he bellowed as he realised that their victory wasn't going to be as easy as he'd thought.
A Tau Crisis suit landed heavily on Private Blake, crushing him with a scream. It turned as it's two fellows landed, spraying out pulse rounds from it's two burst cannons and cutting down a half dozen Stormtroopers. Another turned to Corporal Welsh and fired it's fusion cannon.
Briggs felt his left arm blister from the heat as his subordinate expired, three metres away. He raised his bolt pistol and fired four shots.
The first blasted the mechanical head of the Crisis suit guilty for Welsh's death into scrap and the second detonated in the cheast of the thing, killing the pilot. The third shot disabled one of the burst cannons and the fourth blew off the other mechanical arm.
The remaining two Crisis suits, ignoring the barrage of hellgun rounds, turned their weapons of Briggs.

A krak grenade sailed through the air and punched the burst cannon Crisis suit off it's feet. Briggs rolled aside as the two plasma rifles on the third suit fired, missing him by a scant margin.
Brigg came to his feet and put two bolter rounds into the thing. It staggered backwards but remained standing. Brigg charged with a road as a frag grenade fired by some fool washed flame down the side of the Crisis suit, causing the pilot to flinch.
Briggs closed the distance, battering the plasma rifle aimed at him aside with his chainsword. The whirring teeth ripped into the barrel and buckled it, rendering the gun useless.
The other arm swung around to knock him aside. Briggs ducked it, jamming his chainblade into the elbow of the joint. Something broke with a flash of light and the Crisis suit attempted to lift away, leaping into the air on it's powerful legs.

Briggs brought it down with a bolter shot to it's back. The lucky shot destoyed something vital in the jet pack and the heavy suit tumbled downwards, landing with a crash.
Briggs leapt up onto the stricken xenos suit and threw his bolt pistol aside, taking his chainsword in a two handed grip. He dodged a swipe from the functioning arm then drove the screeching chainblade down with a roar.
The teeth skidded against the armour for a moment before biting. Briggs fought the torque and kept pushing down, slowing tearing the armour open. Sparks and smoke showered outwards.
With a jolt, something gave. The chain sword crunched into the pilot's mechanical womb and the Crisis suit went dead. Briggs wrenched his chainsword free and took cover from the incoming pulse rounds.
“Corporal Danser!” he yelled to his specialist. “Break that command centre open!”
The assault was faltering, he knew. They were out in the open and being cut down. There were barely twenty Stormtroopers left. We only need one, he thought, as the krak grenades from Danser's launcher impacted with the side of the Tau structure and blew it open.
“Go, go, go!” Briggs yelled, making for the breach.

>>6019939
This still made me feel bad :(

It was quiet inside the command centre.
Briggs led his remaining four men down the smooth alien corridors at a dead run, weapons up. The sounds of the slaughter outside slowly died.
“Close enough, sir?” one of the Stormtroopers asked.
“I want visual confirmation.” Briggs growled.
A Tau non-combatant, unarmoured and apparently unaware of the assault, stepped into the corridor. Briggs recognized the insignia on it's xenos uniform; similar to Imperial Intelligence. They were in the correct place.
Briggs shot the startled alien and ran through the door it had emerged through, guessing that since it led towards the core of the complex it was exactly what they were looking for.
He was right. They emerged into a larger space where Tau of various types sat at terminals and xenos cogitators, operating the machines and talking quietly into blasphemous vox systems in their foul tongue.
“Scatter! Engage! Locate the target!” Briggs bellowed as the Tau Fire Warriors stationed around the command node noticed them and opened fire.
The Stormtroopers scattered.

Briggs ran and fired his bolt pistol, eyes searching about the place. Either of the targets would be adequate for a confirmed succesful mission; he just had to get eyes on the target.
A series of blasts from Danser's grenade launcher spread havoc and confusion around the room, scattering the Tau non-combatants and disrupting the clear fire lanes of the Fire Warriors. Danser then died as a Tau pathfinder team, up on gantries circling the room, nailed him with a rail rifle. Briggs ran past Danser's corpse, scooping up the launcher and blasting the Pathfinder team to pieces; there were more, though, so he took cover and resumed his visual search.
What if the target had evacuated? Or worse, both of them? Briggs gritted his teeth and changed to his last drum magazine for his bolt pistol.

His last two men died messily as a burst cannon suddenly roared into life from the head of the room. Briggs looked around and spotted Target Primaris, the Ethereal, sheltering behind...
Sheltering behind Target Secondus, the Tau Commander. Standing tall in an advanced version of their crisis suits and looking Brigg's way.
Briggs fired a shot at it's head, ducked around a cogitator unit as burst cannon rounds tore apart the spot where he'd been standing, then charged.
He fired as he ran, the mix of HE and inferno rounds he'd saved for his last chance box sending explosions and flames rippling across the Commander's armoured frame. Briggs swore one of the inferno rounds punched through the Commander's armour into the cockpit but the battlesuit continued to struggle to retain it's balance and bring it's weapons to bear.
Briggs let out a rising scream, feeling pulse round shots scarring and denting his carapace as he charged towards the commander and the Ethereal. A rail rifle round punched through his left arm and he lost his chainsword. He ignored the pain, reaching the commander, and ducked under the vengeful swipe of it's missile pod arm. Briggs could only assume it hadn't used the weapon for fear of killing it's Ethereal in the back blast.

With a final, vengeful yell, Briggs rammed his bolt pistol up against the cockpit of the Tau Commander. He'd already fired 29 shots from the 30 round magazine; one last bolt remained.
Click.
Of course, he always loaded his magazines short by one round. To avoid stoppages.
Briggs sighed. He looked up into the robotic face of the looming crisis suit.
However the Tau Commander was suddenly still. There was a single, perfect whole in the cockpit armour with smoke rising from it. The inferno round had apparently penetrated.
The suit suddenly dropped. Just like that it lost balance, dead to the world, and fell forwards. Briggs scrambled backwards but slipped in some of his own blood from his severed arm and felt the breath rush out of him as the heavy suit's arm slammed into his midsection, pinning him. His bolt pistol spun away.

A few moments passed before the Tau Ethereal came into veiw. It waved off the Fire Warriors running over and looked down into Brigg's cracked visor.
“Why?” The Tau asked softly, it's heathen tongue twisting the words. “What possible purpose did this assault have? You have thrown away lives, attacking us even during your retreat, and gained nothing but bloodshed.”
Briggs gasped for air, reached up to his helmet. A Fire Warrior tensed up, but Briggs was just unlatching his faceplate. His blood spattered face and moustache were revealed.
“You wish to speak?” the Tau asked.
Briggs coughed and whispered something.
The Tau leaned down. “What? What are you trying to say?”
Briggs allowed himself a bloodstained smile and gestured to the nondescript but very powerful beacon on his belt. “Too close to refineries.” he gurgled. “Had to...pin point you...for maximum accuracy.”
Far, far above, the Imperial warship fired it's prow mounted lance. Just once.
The orbital strike fell away towards earth, twinkling like the burning end of a cigar stub.

>>6019652
Have I mentioned I fucking hate you?
Because I do.
So very much!

Well, hey, this sounds like a fun thread!
Let's see -
> Noir gets turned back into an unfeeling test for >adventurers

...
>story request by other anon

All of you fucking suck, you know that right?

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/5891790/

>>6020086
We love you too.

So very much.

>>6020108
Think you meant Noh...

>>6020131
If you're the anon who did this, let me just ask you this
WHY?

>>6020154
I think you meant shut the fuck up and comment on my epic writefaggotry

>>6020160
At least it didn't involve something horrible happening to Noh, so I'm ok with it - pretty epic main character there.

>>6020167
That's all I needed.
Now I am off, to create more ink via the process of masturbation.

>>6020159
I didn't do it mate. Just posting it to counteract your hatred.

>>6020180
FAIR COP, COBBER
TIE ME KANGAROO DOWN, SPORT
'NOTHER SHRIMP ON TEH BARBIE
FOSTERS
GABLETT JR. SHOULD OF GOTTEN THE NORM SMITH MEDAL
WE ARE GEELONG, TEH GREATEST TEAM OF ALLLL

>>6020180
Not the same guy but...thanks to that anon, we read about Noh being turned into the same unfeeling test for adventurers again...

I kind of hate him too.

>>6020160
Not sure about epic but it was pretty good. But that sort of thing is usual in 40k, so not as much of an impact as the lone ork.

>>6020187

>>6020184
Bless you.

>>6020072
Holy shit that was awesome.

>>6020201
I MISSED THE FUCKING GRAND FINAL
HAD TO WORK
HAD 20 BUCKS ON TOM HAWKINS TO KICK THE FIRST GOAL AND THE CUNT MISSED THE MARK AND LET SOME OTHER DICKHEAD GET IT
HAD TEN BUCKS ON GABLETT TO GET THE FUCKING MAN OF THE MATCH AND THEY GAVE IT TO CHAPMAN
FML
DARWIN IS A SHIT HOLE

>>6020219
I'm sorry if you're having a bad day.

>>6020205
I came.

>>6020086
>>6020154
>>6020180

I was the anon who originally requested it. Like I said, curiousity can be a terrible thing, but I'd rather know sadness than eternally wonder what it would be like ::3

[spoilersdon'tworkon/tg/]Although tbh it wasn't nearly as baw-worthy as I thought it was gunna be. Now I'm wondering what the other story one anon mentioned was.[/spoilersdon'tworkon/tg/]

>>6020227
DID I MENTION I'M ALSO A SAINTS/FREO SUPPORTER?
BECAUSE SERIOUSLY FUCK

>>6020238
Want some fries with that?

>>6020245
GIMME YO BURGER RINGS

>>6020229
I think it was done in like, 10 minutes by some asshole troll.
So there's that.

Just took some time to find all parts for it and put it up here.

IIRC, I think the old guy was supposed to be elminister, or something...

>>6020252
Sorry, out of stock.

>>6020262
NUGGETS THEN.
ENOUGH NUGGETS TO BLOCK MY ARTERIES AND PAIN

>>6020274
I'm afraid you won't be able to afford that.

>>6020279
DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN AFFORD!
I'M INDIGEONOUS! THE MOTHERFUCKING GOVERNMENT PAYS FOR MY SHIT!
SO GIMME YO' NUGGETS!

>>6020293
I wouldn't count on the government, buddy.

"Hey, who the fuck is this girl?"
A group of adventurers were walking through a dungeon, on a quest to find some powerful items.

As they did, they came upon an emotionless girl who looked at them, or perhaps through them.

The one who had spoken, a young man with an edged blade, and a black armor that covered him completely, spoke in an annoyed tone.

His companion, a mage with an imp for a familiar, looked down at the annoying thing as she met his eyes.
"Who cares, let's just takes these items and leave"

At that, the girl seemed to come to life

"Please don't take these -"
"Shut the hell up!"

The armored man snarled at her as he pushed her away, as she bruised her hand falling down.

Things were different from...something before, but she wasn't quite sure what.

...

Oh well, it probably wasn't important anyway - she was just here to test adventurers.
She had no other purpose in existence, and never would.

>>6020310
...w-what?
There's fucking more now?!

>>6020321
They're doing it on purpose.

Attention Faggots!

I will be blessing you with another 3,000 or so words of Sergeant-Major Briggs being awesome on monday, between 11AM and 5PM (GMT+5 (SINGAPORE TIEM))
So pay attention.
Spoiler: there will be orks.

>>6020336
*assuming I am sober enough.

>>6020336
Make sure to archive it for future generations.

Another group came in, maybe a week after the last one

It looked at them, as they froze and stared at her.
One seemed to have an instrument of sorts, while another was some kind of fighter...
What a strange group.

Oh well, might as well start the test

"Please don't take these items"

A long pause
Maybe they hadn't heard the words?

"Please don't take these items"

Strange.
Their eyes seemed to be wet, for some reason.

Not that it is important for the test...

>>6020375
"N-Noh?"
The man with the sword talked.
But that wasn't important.

They just had to deal with the test, that was all.

"Please don't take these items"

Suddenly the one with the instruments ran towards her, before gripping her fiercely.

What was this?
Better to remind them of the test again

"Please don't take these items"

At that, the man holding her (for some reason) froze.

>>6020402
He leaned away from her
"Noh - it's us!
Come now, let's get you away from here, hurry!"

"No"
That wasn't part of the test - that was the only thing which mattered.

They had to handle the test.

>>6020419
"...why?"

After a short moment, she looked at him again

"Please don't take these items"


At this, the man who had grappled her narrowed his eyes
He took out what seemed to be an instrument - bards played instruments, so she knew about them as advanturers.

And he played for her.

>>6020442
As he did so, she merely looked at him
After a few moment, he stopped, a hopeful smile on his face

"Please don't take these items"

The smile was gone, and he then started playing again, as the others looked on.

>>6020457
He paused again, but didn't smile this time
When were they going to deal with the test?

"Please don't take these items"
There, now that would obviously remind them of what they were here for.

The man in front of her winced, though, and started to play again, seemingly agitated about something.

>>6020472
This continued for hours, as the group apparently didn't want to take the test.

They never even looked at it...had they already done this then?
Shouldn't they go onwards and let others do the test?

Every time he stopped, she repeated the same thing over and over again - "Please don't take these items"

This was wasting time.
Something red was even falling from the mans fingers, though it was kind of hard to see what it was.

>>6020500
It seemed the others agreed, since they dragged him away from the area, though he started to scream at them to let him go.
They never looked at her though...that was strange.
And they went the wrong way, as well.

Maybe they had decided not to take any more tests?
Still, she had to be certain, so she called after them

"Please don't take these items!"
Her call echoed after them, but they didn't do anything but pause briefly (though it seemed one of them grimaced, if the mirrored halls reflect his face correctly.
How strange.

Oh well, this didn't matter anymore - she had a duty to handle.
She had her tests.
For the rest of her life.

~Fin~

...
That one was worse, IMO.

OP was gud

it devolves from there

>>6020335
It sure seems that way...

>>6020572
I think everything here is copypasta, but that doesn't mean it can't be good.

>>6020640
Here is the other copypasta of Noh BAD END

And as the pain in his body escalates, he turns to his 'daughter'... the little girl with a blank stare whom he just saved from certain death.

Noh looks at the wounded warrior, curious and seemingly looking for an emotion. The warrior coughs up blood, further increasing the party's anxiety as they look upon him.

"Noh... I'm so glad you're safe. Do not cry for me, for this is another facet of life you must learn." He reels in agony as he speaks. "Before I go, I want you to know that I, no WE love you. You are our daughter, our family."

Noh's gaze pierces the warrior deeply, taking him great amounts of strength to hold his tears back. "Alas... this is the end. Noh... can you smile for me...?"

The little girl looks around, confused and troubled. She then looks straight at the poor warrior and says

"Please don't take the items."

He then died painfully.

the Rogue Trader ork book is really worth its weight (digital or real) in gold