You are a fighter pilot of the 501st Joint Fighter Squadron, and deep in the hangar you hear Yoshika screaming in the only way a Japanese girl can scream. Extremely irritatingly. Sean reclines against the wing of Caldwell's P-40, making it clear that his quota of rescues is full-up. You look at Ian. Ian looks at you.Yoshika squeals with fear and outrage, again. >YOSHIKA CALLS FOR AID>Stare down Ian till he relents and comes with you>Other?
Go help her, natch.
Stare Ian down.
>Yoshika Calls For AidGod dammit, we leave no little sister behind.
Maybe whatever's making her scream will eventually make her stop.That'd be cool, I guess.
>>19546695>YOSHIKA CALLS FOR AIDLook at Ian. "Well, if you're fine with a little girl getting molested while you stand and do nothing, that's good to know. Put's you in proper company with the Irish, there."He's a proper English Gentleman. We can guilt the fucker into this.
>>19546695>YOSHIKA CALLS FOR AID LIGHT THE BEACON FIRESBring shoes in case of spider.
... oh god. I know what's going on.This will only end in tears.
>YOSHIKA CALLS FOR AID>AND PILOT WILL ANSWERCharge! CHAAARGE!
>>Yoshika screaming.>>Fear and outrage."DAMMIT KREPENKSI! KEEP YOUR MITT OFF THE YOUNGER GIRLS!"
>>19546695So. It appears that Wilma finally caught up with Yoshika. The hunter has become the Hunted.
AND ROHAN WILL ANSWER
JESUS FUCK I'M HERE ON TIME.Yoshika calls for aid? Adopted little sister needs our help, CHARGE!
Rescue surrogate little sister.IMOUTO FUCKS TO GIVE, IAN
>>19546695Oh fuck, did some breasts grope her? we gotta fix that shit man
>>19546735I like this option lets go for it.
Looks like posting speed is lightning fast
>>19546800No.Worse.Think for a moment.Who was just training with Ian?Yoshika.Now.Who's obsessive about Ian?Stalkerishly, yandere obsessive, even...One word for you.Perrine.
>>19546846I doubt she'd be that stupid to assume Yoshika is a threat. Even Minna on her bad days doesn't assume that Sanya is a rival.
>>19546905Who just threatened a family friend of Ian's with a sword because she was saying he should tell his own mother he was alive?
>>19546905But canonically Perrine is EXACTLY that stupid, only there it's about her crush on Mio.
>>19546905This is Perrine. In the animu she hates Yoshika because Miyafuji spends an inordinate amount of time instructing her.She is a psychotic borderline-yandere bitch.
>>19546846It's also been stated both in SWQ and SW canon that Perrine does not get along with Yoshika."That... That Japanese whore! Moving in on my Ian! And him! He had his hands all over her! SHE WILL PAY!"
>>19546925And by Miyafuji I mean Sakabroto.Fuck.
>>19546846Shit.That's much, much worse.
>>19546905>Even Minna on her bad days doesn't assume that Sanya is a rivalThen Minna's dumber than she looks.
You stare Ian down, but the heat of your wrath slides off his cool exterior like windblown snow over ice. "You know what's probably going on down there."He nods."Are you ever going to grab the tart by the baugettes, or what?" "What makes you think that analogy works?" Ian marvels.Deeper in the hangar, Yoshika shouts again. "Seriously? Baugettes? Her dough hasn't even risen yet, man. What the fuck is wrong with you?" "I - just - rot in hell," you grump, stomping away from the asshole with a parting flip of the finger. The cavernous hangar is displaying its usual activity cycle; from insanely busy to almost dead within a matter of minutes. You follow the sounds of Yoshika's high-pitched distress, the shrieks and shouts leading you to the side of the hangar closest the wooden-partitioned offices where ground crew and supply records are kept and argued over. It's also where your fighter is typically parked.
>>19546951If she sabotages our fighter, she gets a slap across the eyes, 15-year-old or no.
>>19546951If she's scratched up the nose art, we're running her in to Mio for assault.
>>19546951>where your fighter is parkedOkay, NOW we run.
>>19546983Oh god what if Chuck painted Robin on MC's ride
>Just got home, thought i was gonna get some quality vidya time in>in time for SWQsuch a burdensome life.
Man, it's gotta be a bitch to park the fighter IN the offices.In other news: if shit's scratched, make shit real. With violence.
>>19546999Nah, that was the (assumed) retribution for painting Shirley on his.
>>19546999I told you, I FUCKING TOLD YOU! We could've gotten the first strike in.But no, now Chuck's gotten the idea and gotten to it first.Do you see? DO YOU SEE WHY I MAKE THESE SUGGESTIONS?
>>19546999Then there would only be one thing to do...
Coming around the side of a big fuel truck (which you're pretty sure shouldn't be parked IN the hangar, according to regs - which some people still follow, on occasion,) you find Lynette, Yoshika and Perrine sitting atop the port wing of your Black Widow. Lynette and Yoshika are hugging each other tightly, knees pulled up to their chests, and Perrine is standing alone near the wing root, holding her little froggie pigsticker in both hands, overhead, like she's going to smite the hell out of something. And below them? HellCow. From the Martian 'bot's pseudothroat comes a wicked, soft hiss, and its thin bovine tail shakes sinuously, emitting an impossible rattlesnake racket. >Wat do
>>19547026Oh.. good...Hellcow has it under control.
>>19547026start taking bets?
>>19547026Big Brother voice. To the experienced, they know it means to comply. To the unfamiliar, it is as the voice of God."Off."
>MySQL connection error.>MySQL connection error.>MySQL connection error.>MySQL connection error.>MySQL connection error.
>>19547026[x] Fucking TIME OUT. Cut this shit short. Step right in and accept no bullshit.-[x] Stop this nonsense, it's getting too silly. Everyone explain these shenanigans right now.
>>19547026Aww how cute, playing pirate and making them walk the plank. What's next? Are we burying your booty in the sand by the beach? Cause I can certainly get some shovels.
>>19547026"NO! BAD MARTIAN ROBOT! NO SCARING THE LITTLE SISTERS! ...AND DON'T SCARE PERRINE, EITHER!"
There is only one thing TO do.Let's go cow tipping.
>>19547026"Frenchie, what the fuck did you do to piss off Hellcow?"Obviously, we're taking his side in this argument.
>>19547041This. There is nothing more satisfying then using that voice. It just demands obedience.
>>19547026Step back and observe the situation.This could be hilarious.
>>19547026Time to party hard with hellcow?
>>19547041Going with this.
>>19547041Going with this. . but the effect should be doubled, as it's OUR PLANE and YOSHIKA at the same time.
>>19547041What, off the plane? You want to force the two terrified girls who are currently cowering into each other OFF of the plane?
>>19547001Well, you theoretically could just catch up later.
You cross your arms, plant your feet wide, and in the authoritative voice of Big Brother, you bellow at the bovine 'bot. "OFF."Hellcow's head snaps around snake-quick to aqquire you, and you see its eyes are glowing red.Terror strikes your heart as you realize the truth. The scientists are nowhere to be seen.Nor are the guards.For HellCow has slain them. HELLCOW IS UNDER ALIEN CONTROL. The beast is upon you, springing towards you with the grace and power of Martian robotic technology that makes the most advanced human electric motors look like the crude mechanizations of clever apes. Your hand darts for your holster, but the HellCow slams into you, knocking you over before your hand can even find the grip. You feel yourself hoisted airborne, and see the floor rushing past beneath you.HellCow is bearing you away... into the cellar... into the dark. Hissing as he runs. Somehow, this is not what you'd had in mind when you signed up for flight school. >Wat do
STILL TIME FOR COWTIPPING AND IT MAY BE OUR LAST CHANCE IF WE WANT TO LIVE
>>19547132Don't you mean "bovine"?
Drawfag here, requesting work based on quest. Thanks.
>>19547111We cattle wranglers now? Yee-haw, motherfuckers.
>>19547111Is pilot a praying man? now seems like a decent time to start if not.Pray, to Tesla.
>>19547111No hellcow! don't drag me to Minna, she means to do terrible things to me!
>>19547134Have another decent Sakuya reaction.
>>19547111Quick. Hit it with something.Anything.Everything!
>>19547111SUPLEX. FOR THE HONOR OF LUCHA!
>>19547111Start yelling. "SECURITY BREACH! SECURITY BREACH! LOOSE MARTIAN TECH IN THE BASE!"Either it really has gone rogue, or Minna sweet-talked Mio into telling her how to program it.
>>19547111We need the highlander to fight it! Its the only way!
>>19547111"FIGHT THEM OFF, HELLCOW. YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THEM! REMEMBER THE FUN WE HAD! THE BOUNCING!"Wait, where is he dragging us?
>>19547111Are there any grenades near by? If so, chuck them in after it.Otherwise, time to round up the SAS. We're going on a Hellcow hunt.
>>19547111Well shit...Find a way onto hellcows back and Ride it to the ground.
>>19547156Hooray, I'm illiterate.Yell for Little Sisters 1 and 2 and Frenchie to follow you.
Well this is unexpected. Have Perrine pursue since she hasn't lost it yet, then go alert Sakabroto and Minna.
>>19547163The hell cow is carrying MC
>>19547111Get on Hellcow's back.RIDE THE WAVE. Cowabunga, dude.
>>19547140We never did get a pic of the Minna vs MC sausage fight...
>>19547111Why the hell aren't we calling for Sean?
>>19547171>>19547163We are being carried
choo choo, motherfucker!
>>19547111"This was not as planned! THIS WAS NOT AS PLANNED!!"If we are being borne by the cow, then we ride it while screaming for Sean. "Sean! Get your fucking cow under control!"
>>19547111I assume screaming like a little girl is already happening. As for the rest... Hm. We don't have a gun, are alone and far from help, and most importantly we are not in our plane. Well, most most importantly we do not have booze on hand. I suppose the only thing TO do is B-B-BOUNCE.
>>19547183>cow surfingAlmost as good as alligator surfing.
>>19547111I KNEW ITI KNEW ITI TOLD YOU
>>19547111Traitorous bovine bastard.
>>19547111[x] Space CQC
>>19547174>>19547188Sorry, missed that. Do we have a knife or anything? Lets try and if possible, either cut our way loose, or damage it's eyes/camera things.
>>19547220I almost choked laughing
Seeing as the entire world know already, posting this now shouldn't hurt.
I told you rat bastards about roebutts. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! No one ever listens to the experienced ones.
>>19547286You guys really cannot keep a surprise.
>>19547313You can't really be surprised.
>>19547313Some faggot (cough Kotters cough) linked it to deme's other quest, and deme is 3d pig disgusted
>>19547257It's a shame that Sanya was three hundred bucks.
>>19547378That is a damn shame.
thank god you are doing this today. fucking DayZ
>>19547378Why is it so expensive, do they double as onaholes?
>>19547378Maybe if we got more people involved. ..
>>19547378 329.99 USD ;_;
>>19547396>implying we give two shits about not-lewd Sanya
>>19547398She was released 2 years ago, and at the time I don't think it was known that Alter would continue to grind out the rest of the 501st over a total of 4+ years.
<+Crix`> so I went to the defac<+Crix`> wasn't hungry and nothing looked good<+Crix`> so I picked some chicken strips<+Rynex_> Something smells like airline food in this coffee shop.<+Crix`> then I thought I should get more than just chicken strips<&Kota> How the fuck else am I going to get to his penis?<+Crix`> so I got watermelon<+Crix`> then as I am at the checkout<+Crix`> I realise<&Kota> ( ◕‿◕)<+Crix`> my plate is just chicken and watermelon<+Starasp> every time<+Crix`> in alabama<+Starasp> D:<+Friend_Computer> >Fried chicken and watermelon<+Crix`> in a facility staffed by mostly black people<+Rynex_> Kota: Not yet ready to show you the sheet.<+Friend_Computer> are you incredibly white?<+Crix`> yes<+Friend_Computer> perfect<@Dante41> >Fried Chicken and Watermelon<@Dante41> >Complaining about this<@Dante41> Give it to someone who enjoys it, cur<+Friend_Computer> >White guy buying nothing but steroetypical black food in a place staffed by black peoplerelevant because airforce story
Just go home and SWQ, I am pleased.This would be a prime time to test our gyrognome powers on martian tech.>>19547411Worth it.
How can a figure made out of PVC be worth 300 dollars? It must only cost 50 to produce.
>>19547433><&Kota> How the fuck else am I going to get to his penis?
>>19547447Because people will pay it.It's also out of production by this point, probably.
>>19547452Totally edited. I would never type such a thing.
>>19547447Obsessive fans, that's how.
>>19547467But how can we be sure?
>>19547436oh if that fails GNOME CRUSH its CPU
>>19547476By taking my word at face value.
>>19547447Because people will pay it, and limited productionSupply and demand at it's finest, but people who pay that much are retarded
>>19547467But you did type it. You did.
>>19547485Psh, where's the fun in that?I mean, there's so much fun to be had in doubting you.
>>19547495What da fuq did you just motha fuckin say 'boutme, you little beotch? ah’ll gots you know ah graduated top o' muh motha fuckin class in da Navy Seals, an' ah’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, an' ah gots ova 300 confirmed kills. ah be trained in gorilla warfare an' ah’m da top sniper in da entire US armed forces. you be nuttin' ta me but just another target. ah will wipe you da fuq out wif precision da likes o' which has never been seen 'bfoe on dis here Earf, mark muh motha fuckin motha fuckin werdz. You think you can git away wif sayin` dat sheeit ta me ova da Internet? Think ag'in, fucker. As we's speak ah be contacting muh motha fuckin secret network o' spies across da USA an' yo' IP iz being traced right now so you bettah prepare fo' da storm, maggot. da storm dat wipes out da pathetic little thin` you page yo' life. You’re motha fuckin dead, kid. ah can be anywhere, anytime, an' ah can kill you in ova seven hundred ways, an' dat’s just wif muh motha fuckin bare hands. Not only be ah extensively trained in unarmed combat, but ah gots access ta da entire arsenal o' da United States Marine Corps an' ah will use it ta its full extent ta wipe yo' miserable ass off da face o' da continent, you little sheeit. If only you could gots known what unholy retribution yo' little “clever” comment wuz 'boutto bring down upon you, maybe you would gots held yo' motha fuckin tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, an' now you’re paying da price, you goddamn idiot. ah will sheeit fury all ova you an' you will drown in it. You’re motha fuckin dead, kiddo brace yo'self foo'!
>>19547476[nospoilersontg] it wasn't [nospoilersontg]
But Sanya is love
>>19547518Expensive love at that.
>>19547467He lies!!>[19:35] <&Kota> How the fuck else am I going to get to his penis?
HEY EVERYONE! ITS KOTTERS' BIRTHDAY!
Welp planefag abandoned the thead...... what now?
>>19547567Wait like the AWiY fans
planefag will surely return for another sortie ;_;>woos beesNexcOh god why captcha why the bees?!
>>19547555Happy birthday Kotters!
>>19547598God damn I should have my birthday more often.
Through the musty cellars of the ancient Witch Stronghold you are borne, the back of your shirt clamped tightly in the flat teeth of the Martian HellCow, instrument of your doom. What cleverness it showed, pretending to be tamed - what deviousness lurked behind those warm, brown, stupid, cold, robotic EVIL ALIEN ROBOT EYES. You were not diligent enough, and now you will pay with your life, and be forced to watch from the afterlife as all your adorable adopted little sister-witches are murdered and torn apart by the rampaging HellCow ascendent. Somewhere deep in the cellars, the HellCow skids to a halt, hooves scraping on ancient flagstones, and you're dropped heavily upon the floor. You spring to your feet, lashing out in all directions at once with your fearsome hand-to-hand combat skills, a mighty battle-cry tearing from your throat."HARHARHARLARRRARRRRARGHFLLLTHGZ!" you scream incoherently as you flail about in twelve directions at once, managing to end your spasam of truly random violence upside-down, legs against a wall. In the shadows, at the other end of the room, you see a long, thin man rise from a chair set upon a raised dais. The meager light in this musty cellar-room throws long shadows from his thin form, as he strides towards you, arms raised triumphant. "HELLCOW," speaketh Tesla, gently touching the thirty or so rabbit-ear antennas he's wired into an ordinary steel colander that he's wearing upon his head. "YOU HAVE DONE WELL." Behind you, Hellcow bows politely. "AND NOW, PILOT," Tesla commands, crossing his arms imperiously as he gazes down at your inverted form. "NOW CALLED TO ACCOUNT, WHAT SAY THEE?" >wat say
>>19547658"You're a fucking psychopath. Stop frightening the little kids!"
>>19547658"I don't even..."
I'M SORRY BUT THE PILOT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR IS IN ANOTHER CASTLE
>>19547658So. It has come to this. You. Me. This moment.Also, planefag, last time was your most popular thread on the archive; it's the first thread to get above a 33 rating.
>>19547658"I HAVE COME TO DISCOVER THE CAUSE OF THIS BELLIGERENT BOVINE."
>>19547658"Keep Minna from killing me and I'll be your compliant test-pilot."
>>19547658"How dare you mind control Sean's girlfriend?!"
>>19547658"What is happening?" is always a good answer.
>>19547685...gonna have to agree with Crix, here. Tesla has hit "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" levels of crazy here. And since we have a crazy CURRENT girlfriend, that's saying something.
>>19547669I shall also support this.
>>19547685AHAHAHAHA I DON'T THINK YOU CAN POSSIBLY TOP THIS
>>19547694Even Tesla cannot. Do that task.
>>19547658"I'll never join you!"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siipB-1Zoac
>>19547685That's pretty funny.
>>19547718>>19547685... yeah. No. No we can't.WON'T STOP US FROM TRYING THOUGH!
>>19547685Let's go with this. What can possibly go wrong.
>>19547685This is good. Gotta use the laugh too.
>>19547658*ahem* RAILROADING.Ask him about jetpacks.
>>19547774>Railroading>Robot cowYou do realize it has robohooves, right?
>>19547685As much as I hate to say it, and it hurts me to say it, I agree with Crix.
>>19547378What a shame.
>>19547794Aww their getting along!
>>19547853I'll never like that retard
Now, now, children. Settle down.
>Check the archiveGod dammit, I just made this picture this morning and now I can't ever post it.
>>19547944Maybe it's because people are tired of retarded fanfiction?
"I'M SORRY," you roar, "BUT THE PILOT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR IS IN ANOTHER CASTLE!" Tesla's eyes widen, and he seems to grow even taller as he recoils upwards and away. And then he snaps."GOD. DAMMIT!" he screams, his voice becoming high-pitched. He seizes the antenna colander and hurls it against the wall as hard as possible, sending pieces of aluminum tubing flying everywhere. "GOD DAMMIT! YOU BROKE THE RULES."Your mouth drops open, in blatant defiance of gravity. You glance at HellCow, who is managing to express shock despite his bovine countenance. "YOU BROKE THE RULES," Tesla screams, kicking the colander, which goes flying so hard it begins bouncing between the two walls of the long, narrow room like an empty shell. "NOW EVERYONE'S GONNA BE MAD!" "Um-" somebody ventures from the shadows of the room."Excellent demonstration yes?" Tesla says calmly, his arm-flapping mad wrath vanishing like a switch has been thrown. "As you can see, not only have I isolated several of the command frequencies and codes used for tele-operation of the 'bot, it is also capable of extended independent execution of instructions when out-of-contact."
>>19547958OH GOD AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NylmdC_uEM
>>19547958Call him a virgin
>following SWQ on a cell phone while still at workLook at what you make me do PF
"But-" somebody objects before Tesla cuts them off with an angry slash of the knife-hand. "We're in the cellar! Radio waves cannot penetrate the thick cellar walls, fool!" As your eyes adjust to the low light, you start to make out men lined up against the walls. Scientists, and command staff, it looks like."But your third hypothesis, that the Martians psionic abilities are electromagnetic and/or pseudomagical in nature..." another man is murmuring. "You sent the bot to fetch one with magical ability, but it brought back a male."Tesla's eyes cut towards you, and, in that moment, you realize his dark pupils glitter not with madness... but wicked, evil malice. "Clearly," Tesla says, "this male has had some magic rubbed off on him.">ACCEPT>DENY>MARIO THAT MOTHERFUCKER
>>19547991>"Clearly," Tesla says, "this male has had some magic rubbed off on him."Hey, ain't nobody been rubbing anything off onto me.
>>19547991BOUNCE HIM LIKE A SUPERBALL
>ACCEPTtesla is bro we can tell him
>MARIO THAT MOTHERFUCKER
>>19547991>MARIO LIKE THE FIST OF GOD AND HE IS BOWSER.
>>19547991Mario that motherfucker.No-one gets away with kidnapping MC for anyreason (except Sanyandere.)
>>19547991uh oh.MARIO TIME WHILE SCREAMING OUT TESLA'S ON SHROOMS
>>19547991Well yeah, I thought you knew. By the way I'd bet 5 bucks you're also magical Tesla, have fun with that.
>>19547991>MARIO THAT MOTHERFUCKERTime to do our best Alien impression, here!
>>19547991Mario?I think you meant to say BOUNCE there
>>19547991"Your demon bovine was chasing three witches up my plane, chucklenuts von Doom, I was trying to chase him back off. Go ask for them."...AND THEN MARIO THAT MOTHERFUCKER
>>19548030Magically insane maybe.
>>19547991MARIO TIME.Or Deny.We aren't a wizard. We're a motherfucking GNOME.
>>19547991>MARIO THAT MOTHERFUCKER"Life ain't about how fast you run or how high you climb. It's about how well you bounce."
>>19548050He's not asking if we are a wizard, he's asking if we have magic.
>>19547991BURN.EVERYTHING.And then...could it be? The old stand-by? CRAZYMOTHERFUCKINGIVAN
"Tesla... Call me a gnome"
>>19547977The best part is, how his voice fades in the background as he rants and stomps away through his house, but in the distance you can still hear his madness, screaming, unabated.
WE. KNOW. NAHZEENG!
Also, you guys do realize where Tesla's put you, right?>Admit to gnome>Admit to fucking witches>Room full of BRASS
>>19548098Fuck it, admit that we are Harry Potter.When they ask who it is, ride Hellcow off into the distance.
>>19547991Tell him in all seriousness that we are a gnome. Then lean really close and SCREAM IN HIS EAR THAT HE IS TOO!Then dodge the punch of that old dude who tells us to never call him that.
>>19548098I say run away.
>>19548098Yeah, we get it.
>>19548098But of course.
>>19548098Fine. We'll admit to being a gnome.
I really hope we don't end up seeing Tyrone fuckin' Slothrop at this rate. Or god help us, anyone from the White Visitation.
>>19548098Hence why I voted to deflect that shit and whoopwhoopwhoop on out of there before they can get us under their thumb.
"I AM GNOME! TESLA IS GNOME! CONRAD IS GNOME!">Duck
>>19548098>Admit to gnomeThat's a problem, admittedly.>Admit to fucking witchesShit, son. That's a goddamn BRAGGING right. No need to hide that.>Room full of BRASS...hey WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE. WE STILL HAVE MEDALS TO GET.Ditch this faggot, and go get decorated. That's what we were SUPPOSED to be doing, anyways.
>DenyDon't worry he's only the smartest man alive I'm sure we can totally talk our ways our of this!
>>19548098well boys time to come out with it then say if they TRY to ship us back home were will unleash HELL ON THEM!
>>19548148what about our comrades?
>>19547991Never has a crazy ivan been more inappropriate. lets do it.
>>19548142In a nutshell yeah. Maybe we can pull a Catch-22! Except then we won't be flying and Robin's going to be in a castle full of psycholesbians and our crew. Better be careful then.
Bug the fuck out of there.
Given the circumstances, we can confess to NOTHING. Which means the only solution is to throw proceedings into ABSOLUTE FUCKING ANARCHY and escape in the midst of the chaos.
>>19548181If we do, then they'll know because we bugged the fuck out of there.
>>19548169or we could take the third option that PF gave us and bounce our way out of there.Which would be a far smarter route than saying MC is a gnome or is fucking witches.
>>19548190That's actually a pretty good plan. Switching my vote to this.
>>19548164Go get them too. But don't forget about the medals. This is the FIRST time we've gotten positive, appreciative recognition for our actions. Lets not get distracted, hmm?
Admit to gnome and Mario that motherfucker.
>>19547991"Or maybe your cow doesn't know what the hell magic is in the first place?"
>>19548190Quickly, subtly use gnomepower to fuck with electromechanical devices in vicinity, and then flee! Flee to...uh...an imminent death by means of semi-rightfully-infuriated redheaded Kraut?
MC's thoughts right now; "Come on martians, don't fail me now, air raid, air raid, air raid."
I don't think it matters what we say right now
<&Kota> >mfw I can now fap to my own characters
>>19548292>donuts for dessert
How about "How the fuck is the cow supposed to know what magic is?"
>>19548299Fake. I would never type that.
>Claim to be a witch>remove pants>Strike pose
>>19548303She did it too.
>>19548314Should I screen cap it for them instead?
>>19548217Do you really want to tell NIKOLA TESLA that he doesn't know what he's doing to his face?Do you really want to imply that HELLCOW is defective and wrong while its still in the room with you?Really?
>>195483222 wrongs don't make a right. She has every reason to be mad.
>>19548335You'd photoshop it for me?
>>19548303Well, she was in the middle of dyking out with Cupcakeski when the entire thing came crashing down, so that does take some wind out of her sails.
>>19548307That feel when your waifu's VA got married
>>19548322If i recall pilot interrupted them mid coitus, and she claimed post-battle stress relief.Pilot full on fucked her on the kitchen table in a pointless ego-battle.that would put minna's anger as fully justified in my books.
>>19548336We've done more retarded things.
>>19548344>liking minnaChrist dude, that's weird
>>19548344Her face is too long. It looks unnaturally extended.
>>19548271This may be the best approach. That or say we pushed miyafuji out of the way as Hellcow went in to grab them.
>>19548349How about we have a threesome to mend hurt feelings?
>>19548344My waifu doesn't have a VA.... for more reason than one.
>>19548337She doesn't know our first name. Whatever argument she has is invalid.
>bounce me like one of your EYE-TALIAN GIRLSThere's only one way to reply to this outrage. You twist at the hip, flinging your legs to the floor and torquing your torso along for the ride, till you're laying belly-to-floor, legs scrunched up behind, pressing against the wall. You shove off the wall, sending you sliding across the flagstones. For some reason they're incredibly slick, as well as smooth-worn with centuries of use, so you launch straight for Tesla's legs with no problem. "LIIIIIIIES" you scream as you crash into the man's ankles, toppling him over your back. The lanky old scientist is just scrambling to his feet when you hear the door crash open behind you."UNHAND HIM!" Perrine, Lynette and Yoshika all scream together. You rubberneck to see them standing in the doorway, striking dramatic poses but, you note, not coming any closer to the HellCow that's giving them a rather jaundiced look, unimpressed.The effect on Tesla, however, is immediate.
>>19548355>>19548361You know you love her.
And then all hell broke loose.IN STARK CONTRAST TO WHAT NORMALLY HAPPENS HERE OLOLOLOLOOLO
>>19548365>polyamarous sex acts solve problems>now you're thinking like an MSQ player.sounds perfectly plausible, although the time to do that would have been when they were first interrupted, i reckon.
>>19548410Least popular character.
>>19548398>The effect on Tesla, however, is immediate.Ah, damnit girls....quick, throw Perrine to Tesla, and then fly you damned fools!
>>19548355There must be alot of weirdos then as this is basically on Minna route.
>>19548410Why is she so RED?Everyone else is somewhat realistic with their colors.Then Minna is fucking red.This ticks me off.
>>19548393You don't either, so your argument is lofty at best.
>>19548413Yeah, it's probably too late for it now.
>>19548398>Yoshika, Lynette and...Perrine(?!) coming to our rescue...huh. Well on ya, Frenchie.Also, incoming "EEWWW COOTIES" reaction from Tesla.
>>19548413Even trying it would have resulted in Planefag finding an even more equisite way to harvest and quaff our tears. He feeds on our suffering and misery; it is known. There is nothing to be done except face it resolutely while trying to make the inevitable downward spiral as blazingly magnificent as possible.
>>19548398Perrine of all people came to help MC? ;_; that's so sweet, she doesn't hate him as much as she pretends to.Miyafuji and Lynette are far less of a surprise and quite welcome.
>>19548365I cannot fully express just how bad idea this is.
>>19548337>she has every right to be mad>justifying blatant hypocrisyThis has to be some kind of terrible joke.>MinnafagsOh wait, it is!
>>19548413If we had gone for her butthole, it would have put us squarely at first in our ego battle...
>>19548432He was LOOKING FOR SOMEONE WITH MAGIC POWERS, I don't think he's going to freak out in the way you expect.
>>19548444Until she returned the favour, anyway.
>>19548438Quaff is such a rogueishly brilliant word...
>>19548410Sie ist mein ehefrau!
>>19548455I think we narrowly avoided "bad end"
>>19548440Perrine is perfect.
>>19548455It's all bout who gets the tongue in first. Which would obviously be us.
>>19548438you could have also, y'know, not fucked the cupcake.
>>19548398>Tesla>man>Yoshi/Lynn/Perrine>girl(s) in the back of the roomhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cN9jTnxv0RU
>>19548443We could get mad too, you know. We just haven't.
>>19548476You really are a maniac, aren't you?
>>19548355>>19548361Pity the Trudefag.A pathetic sack of ronery destined to long for a shitty waifu that never cared, it spends its pitiful, brief life, alone in his basment with nothing to keep him company, or to offer his waifu but the meekest, most halfassed flame warriors. Perhaps a single vote in just after thever benn counted to touch his heart with the barest hope.Me? As a Minnafag I enjoy the mightiest spammers of all the boards 4chan has to offer. Unf, it courses through my veins. The moe of the commander gods will soon overtake me, and one day I may even get a sex scene. What has the Trudefag to look forward to but grim life, and if he is lucky, perhaps he get a railroaded 'lets be pals scene' at the end of the quest.He lives for a waifu, but he shall never unf her. I shall spare a second to think of him and his kind. Then I shall vote to lick minnas feet!LOVE FOR THE COMMANDER!HANDS FOR HER ASS!HAIL MINNA!
>>19548480>"Stick your wiener in the schnitzel"ftfy
>>19548474meine Ehefrau. meinE.
>>19548444Haha, nice trips, mesorry guys, just been thinking about how we could use our gnome powers to beat cupcakeski in a sex-contest with Minna...
>>19548491>TrudefagPlease. I wish I had as much of a chance as the Trudefag.
>>19548480This is entirely true. Poor decisions were made, and will continue to be made. But all we can do is move forward through the smouldering wreckage.Plus if we hadn't, Lynette's chastity would have been imperiled~
>>19548501... but im not female.
>>19548499I'm minimizing my metaphors so as to not dodge the fact that that was a terrible decision.
>>19548491That's no Minnafag, boy. That's gone beyond Minnafag. That's just being a fag.
>>19548507You think you've got it bad? She's at least getting paired up with Ian.Not only is my waifu getting shut out by Man Law, we hardly even get to see her anymore.
>>19548469Let me guess, you're going to have Minna offer to have a threesome with cupcake and us, then laugh as the stupider elements of /tg/ pick the option that will obviously lead to horrible consequences.
>>19548507I felt like a trudefag before, but I think that arc ended when we found Chris, and now there's not more in her subplot. So Minna it is.
>>19548522It doesn't matter. "die Ehefrau" is a feminine noun, so any and all associated adjectives must be gendered accordingly. The subject being discussed is the important part in German grammar, not the speaker.
>>19548521Naw, once we had her in the makeout we had a perfect opportunity to MAXIMUM TROLL her by pulling out. If anything the little show we put on imperiled Lynettes chastity more than (almost) anything.
>>19548540A Sakabroto, eh?
>>19548540You... want to bang Ian's unseen sister?
>>19548561Not quite. I didn't have a picture, but maybe I should've done and saved one.Shirley.The bit about Man Law refers to us having known Chuck for more than 24 hours.
Shirley is the only destination.
>>19548582Ah, yes. Well, we kinda torched relations with her right from the get-go, though. A shame.
>>19548582Damnit, I knew I forgot a sister.
>>19548548damn, forgot that...i must brush up on my German, for Minna's sake...
>>19548582I would have, but planefag had her come onto us waaay to hard at the beginning if you remember right. She would've made a great fuckbuddy, but no real romance subplot would've worked out... and then Chuck showed up.
>>19548586Mah bro. Too bad that end shall never come. Hug it out with me.;_;
>>19548608Looking pretty 1890s there, ladies.
>>19548588>>19548604I though the main thing preventing more was everyone retardrushing towards Minna; the gas tank thing was pretty minor compared to the shit Minna flipped out over.But yeah by the time Chuck showed up, teh story was deep in Minna and slightly in Trude.
>>19548623I miss Kathy
>>19548629Shirley's hat is still in use today. Though pretty much only by scary tankers.
>all this waifufagI want planefag to get us with Minna so all you faggots would shut the hell up.
>>19548523It wasn't just a terrible decision. It was a fucking retarded decision. I cannot state that enough. For one, it risked pissing off a superior officer, for the second, it could have driven her off the deep end. She lost Kurt once. Losing him a second time would break her, and then US when she inevitably goes psycho over it.
>>19548638She's fun, it's understandable to miss her.
"OH SWEET FUCK," Tesla screams, recoiling from the girls like they're made of burnium. He points a shaky hand at Yoshika, who's wielding a frying pan, then redirects his quavering digit to Perrine. "G-G-G-ET TH-THTH-EM OUT OF H-H-H-H-HEEER," he wails. From the shadows, a few MP's step forward, looking extremely, extremely confused. "Dr. Tesla," one of the guys with stars on his shoulder asks tentatively, "uh, what exactly is-""IT'S ROUND, ASSHOLE," Tesla nearly screams. "That pan is fucking ROUND. And that Frog has long, messy, nasty disgusting static-generating HAIR. And JEWELRY!" He drags long fingers down his gaunt face despairingly. "She's bringing rogue electrons in here along with her own grounds and metallic influences and god fuck man that pan is ROUND!"Two of the officers, whom you presume are from DARPA or a related agency, cut their eyes at each other. "Threes," Tesla whispers. "Divisible by three's is best, but you know what you divide round shit by?"".... uh-""Three point-" you begin."ONE-FUCKING-FOUR!" Tesla howls. "POINT ONE-FOUR! COULD'VE BEEN AWESOME BUT NO, NO, THAT POINT-ONE-FOUR IN THERE JUST TO FUCK EVERYTHING UP! And you know where it ends, pilot?"".... um.""IT NEVER FUCKING ENDS," Tesla wails. "No clean answer, the numbers keep going. Divide and the numbers keep going. Numbers, why do you keep going?"
I haven't read the side quests. Are they any good?
>WaifuwarsOh how I missed this quest
>>19548659Tesla needs to come up with the New Pi.
>>19548659Lets leg it while the legging is good.
>>19548659Now get out of there, and get back to the checklist before someone else bugs us.
>>19548659>Tesla hates piThis man...is our enemy. I see that now.
>>19548648Agreed. Hell, I don't give a fuck who we fuck, as long as at the end of the day, it doesn't end up increasing our chances of a horrible death, ours or one of the witches.Plus as we all know, P-61 is our one true love.
>>19548659THE NUMBERS TESLA!WHAT DO THEY MEAN!
>>19548649that's what happens when you put ego before reason and have a "more trouble than she's worth" girl involved.
(Now with Images, because fuck you captcha)What is a waifufag?A miserable pile of longing and vitriol!Determined to fight with others of their kind in petty squabbles, trying to establish superiority on a subject cared for only by them! Watch as they rage, fight and do nothing, left eternally to their lonesome self!But the skylord cares not. The thread shall continue, unheeding of their whims. In short, quit the arguing and get back to the bouncing, we have Tesla to deal with, Belmont.
>>19548660Short answer: No.Long answer: Eh, not really, but better than the end-of-thread writefaggotry.
>>19548659Did... did Tesla just break? Or is this another side effect of his genius?
>>19548648>implying the waifufags will ever shut up
>>19548659Is it just me has Tesla become progressively more mad?
>>19548688Most people who deal with math long enough also hate pi. Seriously: fuck pi.
>>19548660One is based on Tanks which is sorta only slightly complete ass. One is Submarines which is just fucking retarded.
>>19548733Wasn't there one for infantry?
>>19548659Did... did pi break tesla?
>>19548748That's one of the post-quest writefags. Who is apparently shitty.
>>19548757Pi AND girls.
>>19548710I love you in a totally platonic way.
>tesla>ocd about numbersThis quest is getting crazy.
>>19548764This Quest is retarded enough, and only is passable because Deme is a good writer.
>>19548764What else do you expect when you compare something with PF's stuff?
There's more than one post-thread writefag? I always leave before that. What are they writing about?
The brass are starting to look genuinely unsettled. "What are you girls doing in here, anyways?" one of them snaps irritably at the three Witches. "Don't you have flight assignments? Witches are scarce enough without this tom-foolery!""We're here to rescue him!" Yoshika declares sternly, waving her frying pan at you. Tesla cringes. "We're not leaving without him, you miserable old bastard!" Tesla rounds on Yoshika like a snake-bit mongoose, fire in his eyes. "Yoooou," he growls, hands flexing madly. He stoops suddenly and comes up with one of the aluminum antennas he knocked off his colander-helmet. He advances on Yoshika menacingly, holding the antenna forward like a magic wand. Yoshika thrusts her frying pan in front of her defensively, adopting a sword-fighting stance, one leg further forward then the other."D-d-d-don't c-c-c-come a-any c-c-closer!" she stammers through her fear. But Tesla simply stares her right in the eye, waggles his impromptu wand a little bit, and hrms seriously. "Ah... yes," he says. "Yes. You were right, Miyafuji. You were right. There is courage yet in Witches.' "I- I didn't-""Not you," Tesla says dismissively. "Your father."
>>19548778>This quest is getting CRAAAAAAAZAYftfy
>>19548778Getting crazy? Son, this shit has been bananas since the first thread.
>>19548778>gettingwelcome aboard friend! Your broken rape whistle will come in the mail shortly.
Hitler's take on Strike Witches.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQS3qYCkscM&feature=related
>>19548791Ok, the fuck? We're out of here.
Just to be clear, Tesla was actually batfuck about this stuff:http://www.badassoftheweek.com/tesla.htmlHopefully this link will also sum up why he's getting away with this shit, he's such a genius, the army needs him.
>>19548785Well, you could stay and find out. I wouldn't recommend it, but who knows? Maybe you'll like it.
>>19548791Is that some plot I smell cooking?
>>19548791>being rescued>by MiyafugiI don't know if I should be proud or embarrassed.
>>19548791Her father, you say?
>>19548828it'll be something to be used later to bolster her spirits when she's being all angsty.
>>19548791>Tesla>Taunting Yoshika about her fatherYeah, now is time to run.
>>19548828Proud, son. We need to take her shopping for aviators and pants and FLIGHT CHRONOMETERS next chance we get.
>>19548778This shit has been lunacy for ages now. If you didn't realize that we're in fullbore maniacal magical mahyem mode by the point where we were pulling a taran on the flying hulk of the Edmund Fitzgerald over the English countryside, you're denser than a harem comedy protagonist.
>>19548785Different theaters of the war.
>>19548818> ... and occasionally thought he was receiving electromagnetic signals from extraterrestrials on Mars.In Soviet England, hellcow controls YOU!
>>19548860More like different GAY-aters of GAYamirite
>>19548801>THEY HAVE NO FUCKING PANTS YOU PEDOPHILEcan't fuckingbreathe
We need to fucking RUN!
>>19548791Oh dear. Breakdown incoming anyone?
>>19548791>"Not you," Tesla says dismissively. "Your father."Ooooooooo it's on now. He knows stuff about her dad.Plot up in this thread?
>>19548791>Invoking papafujiBut ... we already got our mid-season upgrade!
>>19548785You got the guy writing about a joint witch - P-38 Squadron in North Africa, you got the guy writing about a battleship on the North Sea, you got another guy writing about a Witch unit in Canada, and then you got the guy who's writing about German infantry behind enemy lines going to rescue a Polish Witch
Don't believe Ondo- Telsa's lies
>>19548901And then the two TWQ writefags.Marines in Aussie land and... Something else, I forget what. Also subwitches I think.
>>19548917>And then the two TWQ writefags.There are two writefags in TWQ?
>>19548917>TWQ>WritefagsPick none, TWQ is too shitty to have writefags
>>19548880"What did I do to deserve this" always fucking kills me.
>>19548880Oh my, hope I didn't almost kill Planefag.
>>19548934TWQ is still happening?
>>19548953Well I did some for the first couple of threads. Pretty shitty. But hey. First time writefaggotry is always the worse.
>>19548880How have you not seen that yet? Don't you search Strike Witches on youtube neurotically?
>>19548968>Don't you search Strike Witches on youtube neurotically?STOPJust listen to yourself for a moment.
>>19548968Speaking of which:http://www.youtube.com/user/gukko2011
>>19548967I remember trying to do a Liberal Crime Squad quest based on the tabletop RPG version Grimith made on the VA forums... no preparation, lasted two sessions before it fell apart and I was banned by a mod who didn't know what LCS was...
>>19548992Eventually you find all sorts of great stuff.Like the terrible DS game.
>>19548801>It still smells like Jack Daniels
>>19548901>German infantry behind enemy lines going to rescue a Polish WitchDIS GUNNA BE GUD
Raise your hand if you've never seen a single episode of Strike Witches!
>>19548966Yeah, unfortunately panzer isnt dead yet
>>19549028...I wish I could raise my hand.
>>19549038YOU SICK FUCK!
>>19549028*raises hand**lowers it, weeping softly*
>>19549028i pre-ordered the first season so i got the patch.
>>19549028Fucking planefag making me unable to raise my hand....
>>19549028And not a single fuck is given about that.
>>19549028And yet I have a Strike Witches folder with 750 images in it. Damn you planefag!
>>19548996ahaha what in the world
>>19549089http://www.mediafire.com/?dl5jo68valn5tMy mediafire is augmented
>>19549079>those earsAlso, Minna looks younger than the other two.
>>19549075Was it that really awesome quality one made by manufacturers of actual military patches?Or some cheap shit?
>>19549028why would you need to watch it if you already know what it's about?/raises hand
>>19549096I dunno, some weird ass channel that I found one day. I actually don't think I've seen anyone else post it, does that make me cool?
>>19549079Go back to bed, Panzer.
>>19549079It's like my girl wanted to have sex but she wanted to do something different...
>>19549115>>19549089>>19549084>>19549079>>19549062>>19549046>>19549028I feel really out of place.
>>19549117hell yeah nigga
>>19549134everyone is out of place, nigga dis fochan
>>19549155I feel too weeaboo for 4chan.
>>19549165what you say is impossible.
>>19549172Who spilled yogurt on Sanyan~
>>19549183I think the point went over your head
>>19549172Hey Panzer.Panzer.Panzer.When's the next TWQ?
>>19549185It's ice cream! Stoopid!
>>19549165/b/ isn't the real 4chan, 4chan basically started as an anime and japanese culture appreciation board. But then it evolved into three separate entities, the Porn and Evil, the Angst and Summer, and the Original Intent. I'd say /tg/ falls squarely in the middle of AaS and OI, with a dash of PaE.
>>19549220You guys are fucking retarded.
Yoshika's frying pan quavers in the air as Tesla stares her down."You knew my father?" she says in a very small voice."Knew?" Tesla says with amazement. "Knew!? I hated the son-of-a-bitch like a brother!" The young girl blinks, nonplussed."If I tell you about him, will you put down that fucking pan?"Yoshika thinks about it, then glances at you as she bites her lip."I still can't leave without him." "Done." Tesla says. "Him, you and Hell Cow, that shall make three, and three is good." He flips his hand dismissively at all of the high-ranking officers, famous scientists and assorted men in the room. "Dismissed, please.""Like HELL we are," the General-apparent snarls. "You've got important work to do, you psychopathic fuck, and I've had just about all I'm going to take from you." With a single motion of his hand, several MP's start moving towards Tesla, who sprints for the end of the room. Two more MP's move to stand in front of a large science-y looking control panel, submachine guns leveled. "Fine," Tesla says. "I see how it is." He stomps over to the chair on the raised dais and flings himself into it angrily. Reaching into a box sitting nearby, he produces another colander bristling with salvaged antennas, and with great gravity, places it primly upon his balding pate. Even from the floor, across the room, you can see the brass rolling their eyes dramatically."Now," Tesla intones dangerously. "Witness the scientist enraged! TO ME, ELECTRONS AND MAGNETIC FIELDS!" And then the entire fucking dais lifts off the floor.
>>19549200the 22nd, I finnally managed to talk to planefag and get some shit sorted out
>>19549244What did Edinburgh want with Sean, anyway?
>>19549244OUT FINALLY! FREE!
>>19549244>tesla, master of SCIENCE! using his gnome powers and is the electricity kingi love it.
>>19549244See? This is why you don't poke the fucking bear.
>>19549244Quick, escape while everybody is distracted!
>>19549244>pissing off the Mad ScientistWhy do morons keep doing this...
>>19549250>Three days to writefag at my abysmally slow pace>Like anyone will want to read it anyway.Best get back to my backlog of reading and shit.
>>19549244HIS SOUL IS FREED FROM GRAVITY
>>19549250Okay then. Maybe I'll be home in time to catch it.
>>19549244ahahah time for science?
>>19549244INCOMING ARTILLERY FIRE! GET THE FUCK DOWN!It's the military version of shouting "FIRE" in a crowded theater.
>>19549244Run for it.
>>19549244LET'S GET MOVING, NIGGA!
>>19549244THERE"S ONLY ONE TRUE YURI
>>19549323http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdDAsuj8T9gI have trained you well.
>>19549244For Science! Now bug the fuck out.
>>19549244He has attempted SCIENCE. It is no longer safe to be in the vicinity.>implying it was ever safe in the first place
>>19549321Damn beat me to it.
Now would be a good time to hide in a corner...
>>19549361A corner won't save us. We need to de-ass this area immediately.
>>19549332Where did... you get that eila plush............... and how much?
As the dais becomes airborne and floats towards the brass, HellCow springs to his feet, eyes glowing red, and starts that insane rattlesnake-rattle with his bovine tail again. "YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD OUT-SMART TESLA?" Tesla roars, his hands reaching out in claws. "YOU THOUGHT I NEEDED THAT PRIMITIVE CONTROL CONSOLE TO BEND THE MAGANATRONIC SPECTRUMS TO MY WILL!?!? FLY, YOU FOOLS! FLY!" With a great screaming and panicking, a dozen odd scientists, officers, Military Police and one general haul ass out the door, screaming and shouting, with Perrine and Lynette hot on their tails as they stampede out the door. Within seconds, only you, HellCow and Tesla are left...... and Yosika. Back pressed against the wall, tears streaming down her face, she wields her pan before her, the cookingware wobbling dangerously with the tremors of fear rattling her slender frame.Tesla lands his floating dais with a kerdunk of wood-on-stone. He nods at HellCow, whom abandons its aggressive posture and sits back on its haunches like a dog, content. Tesla turns his eyes on you and Yoshika, who's sidled along the wall to stand next to you.Arching his eyebrows with the imperious superiority of the Mad Scientist, he says, low and intent:".. don't fuck with my electrons."And then he bursts out laughing like a fucking lunatic.
>>19549433WHY WERE WE NOT FLEEING WITH THE REST OF THEMDOWN THIS PATH IS ONLY DOOM
>>19549433i now have a new role model for my life
>>19549433Laugh with him
>>19549433So it looks like brass doesn't conduct electricity after all.Take aviators.Apply to Yoshika.
>>19549433GODDAMMIT PLANEFAG GET US OUT OF HERE
To support the Little Sister!This is the only path, UNLIMITED ELECTRON WORKS.
>>19549439God dammit, why am I so late to SW merch,>>19549478No problem really, I'm just sad I missed dat delicious Eila, pic related, my face when dat Eila
>>19549433http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=owc1wKcy8fsGod damnit right as I put on Hell March 3!This is an awe inspiring moment.
Am I the only one who doesn't find this amusing?
>>19549478I recognize that lineup Taso, stop showing off.
"I've been wondering," begins Yoshika, "what are Magic-chlorians?" You settle in to explain. "Magic-chlorians are microscopic lifeforms that live inside all magic cells."Yoshika looks skeptical. "They live inside me.""Inside your cells, yes," you nod, "and we are symbiotes with them.""Symbiotes?""Lifeforms, living together for mutual advantage," you clarify. "Without the Magic-chlorians, Magic wouldn't exist, and we would have no knowledge of Witches. They constantly talk to us, telling us the will of our electrons. When you learn to quiet your mind, you will hear them speaking to you."
>>19549433Laugh with him & reassure Meuhfoogee. She's liable to turn into a stuttering wreck. Wait...
>>19549264er refresh my memory on that one?
>>19549527Everybody has there down times.
>>19549549Minna said Edinburgh wanted Sean for some reason. You never said why.
>>19549549When we jumped out of the tower with our parachute, Minna demanded we wait to hear what Edinbrugh had to say about Sean. We interrupted her to say that she had to stop Eila from groping Sanya and stormed off.
The best part is that planefag has never played red alert despite it being hilariously relevant
>>19549433He laughs.Tears streaming down his face, the tall, lean man slides out of his chair boneless as the laughter steals all power from his muscles. He starts wheezing as he runs short of air, clapping his palms over his face as he continues to guffaw helplessly. "Did... you see.. .their... fucking... FACES...""... what?" Yoshika asks, completely confused. "Their faces," Tesla manages, catching his breath. "That 'oh look he's finally gone completely batfuck insane, send for men with butterfly nets,' and then - and then -" Tesla breaks down laughing once more, lying upon his dais, weeping with pure mirth. In a stark moment of clarity, it dawns on you.>WAT SAY
>>19549598He listens to you for some reason, make him play it.
>>19549604Oh, you thought of that too?
>>19549604"He who pretends to live in the mouth of Madness escapes all scrutiny."Bow down to him."Master."
>>19549604"...You...you're a pilot, aren't you?"
>>19549604We could use some electric wings on the rolling court martial.
>>19549570>>19549577Oh! Thank you for reminding me. Once you get Minna calmed down by giving her an apology/present/thedick, you'll really want her help to get Sean on-board with the gnome shit.
>>19549604THE MOTHER FUCKER CRAZY IVANED THEM !!!
>>19549570>>19549577We're gonna have to talk to Minna about this, aren't we?That's just great.
>>19549604I feel like he's earned some kind of electrical wordplay for that. Tell him you'll keep your ion him.
>>19549604You're a gnome!Alternatively: You're not crazy at all!
>>19549604laugh, just keep laughing because god damn thats awesome.then let yoshika find out about her daddy then SCIENCE!that is best end, do it.
>>19549634Nice to have a goal, at least....and I thought you said they were ok now...
>>19549634>calm her down by giving her the dickWE'RE TRYING, DAMN IT. YOU'RE THE ONE STOPPING US.
>>19549634Present? What do we have to give her?
>>19549656Blame the martians
>>19549624Seconding this.We may be the Bounce Lord, but Tesla is the Troll Reaper of the Battlefield.
>>19549674It's ok planefag, just trollercoaster us into the best waifu
>>19549670We can think of something.>Tuviduc Sicilies,No, Inglip, Corsica.
>>19549699That's not Cupcake.
>>19549699But that's not Minna in the picture!
>>19549604Oh god's he's a sane gnome!
>>19549718She's a girl we fucked. Not a waifu.
>>19549732She's just lost and needs our guidance. We can help.With our penis.>>19549739Fuck you I was trying to post that.
>>19549748Deal with it.
>>19549699But Laura isn't in this anime?
>>19549604"'Round here, we call that 'bouncing'."
When are we getting a new thread?
>>19549718>implying cupcake is anything but a slut
oh, almost forgot.Daily Dose.
While I'd rather go after another girl, but I won't go about aiding in a repeat of the most horrid routefaggotry war ever.
Bounce for the Bounce God!
>>19549748She has a total disregard of the consequences of her sleeping around. We best stay clear before we get burned again.
>>19549841Nothing a little Gnoming couldn't fix.
>>19549841The only thing that's gonna burn is in our pantsu.
>>19549834Tesla for the Tesla Coil!
>>19549860Pilots, no sense of right and wrong.
>>19549814Well... while we are at it midas well mention it...There is always the Miyafuji route. Pure pure miyafuji.
>>19549855That's what got us into this mess in the first place. The only reason /tg/ ever liked her was because she was easy. Other than that, she has no support.>>19549860See what I mean?
>>19549860The clap burns like fucking lava.
>>19549877Of course not, they don't need to know which was is wrong when flying.
hey youstop posting lewd things
>>19549888> The only reason /tg/ ever liked her was because she was easy.People like her because she's us. What's better than selfcest?
>>19549906Your wrist get's sore.
>>19549915Then we'll use Cupcake's
>>19549906She's like the old, irresponsible us. Although there are some here who object to any character development whatsoever.
>>19549942>Although there are some here who object to never pressing the big red button.i think that might be more accurate.
>>19549964Players love the big red button.
>>19549699I support this!In der Heimat wohnt ein blondes Mägdelein und das heißt: Erika. Dieses Mädel ist mein treues Schätzelein und mein Glück, Erika. Wenn das Heidekraut rot-lila blüht, singe ich zum Gruß ihr dieses Lied. Auf der Heide blüht ein kleines Blümelein und das heißt: Erika
>>19549939>>19549961You don't know what you are causing!
>>19549971i was about to mention that
>>19549973>You think of how you head-butted Minna cold, to save her life - and then rushed into the Martian submarine like you were Captain Jesus or something. And that "dead men walking" speech you gave her later, in the cellar. You think of all that "destiny of the pilot is death" babble and wince involuntarily.>Christ, were you really that self-centered?>*Were?*We're different now. Deal with it.
>>19549942>the old, irresponsible usIt's not the irresponsibility that was changed. It was the belief that MC was doomed to a certain fiery death flying and instead of just accepting it he would do his damnedest to keep on living to look out for his friends & family.Seems pretty sappy after typing that out actually. Eh, fuck it.
>>19549988why is she wearing mee a foo jee's swimsuit?
>>19550004Know whats even better then lewd perrine? Finnish witches
>>19549971>>19549997SERIOUSLY.That damn button!
>>19550034[x] Touch Fluffy Stoat
>>19550047>Erica with long hairBueno.png>Trude with shortNOPE.jpg
>>19550043There are 2 types of players in this quest. Those who want some sort of satisfactory ending to this quest, and those who want to see it smash into the ground in a big fireball as possible.Problem is, the second group can ruin the first group with a single vote, while the first group can't really effect the the second. Such is the mechanics of trolls.
>>19549765Are you me?
>>19550148Nah. I think he's me.
inb4 NEXT TIME ON STRIKE WITCHES QUEST
>>19550144>people genuinely having a good time in a different way from me>all trolls.
>>19550144I'd say it's more about wanting to push the button and see what happens then deliberately trying to ruin the quest.
>>19550168He doesn't do it until someone says it, you mongoloid.
>>19550172>People having fun by ruining mine>Not trolls
>>19550144Been saving this for a while....
>>19550163How can all three of us be the same person?
>Touch the fluffy tails
>>19550192the wreck this shit into a fireball people were here before anyone taking things seriously.
>>19550200thanks for the correction.
>>19550234Only if you feed the fluffer with toast first
>>19550211I dunno man, I know I am me.
For fuck sake now I gotta fap
>>19550202Fuck yeah, Mio.
>>19550235We have been arguing about this since thread 1. Neither side was "Here First". Not that it would mean anything if they were.
>>19550292>Not that it would mean anything if they weredick-waving credit. there's always that.
>>19550280You weren't already?
>>19550310God knows they LOVE to wave their dick around.
>45 minutes >no updateThred ded go to bed
>>19550144agreed; why else would so many moronic decisions be made like fucking Cupcake?
>>19550328The flamewar must have scared him off.
>>19550283Tis what the faggots got em
>>19550362Should've gotten him something more risque, so when his sister/mom/dad finds it, shit would happen.
>>19550322I AM RESISTING, STOP WITH THE LEWD THINGS
>>19550370The lewd Sanya was triple the price.
TIME TO GO TO BEDDDDnight planefagGOT. I'll see the archive I GUESS
>>19550379Fucking really? 450 bucks for a piece of fucking plastic? Jebus
>>19550407Well, actually, triple 130 is 390. Lewd Sanya was about 330, iirc.
>>19550370Mio is his waifu, gotta give the man a waifu
>>19550419>three times 130
>>19550419Still 330 gorram dorrars for a 6 inch tall figurine that make you never ever get laid and you show to nonne. Jebus
>>19550407But you can jack off on it!
>>195504439 inches, so 8 inches longer then Kota's pingus
>>19550454Are you spying on me?
>>19550379Almost surprisingly so. Then again...Japan.
>Planefag fell asleep again
>>19550443So it doesn't double as a onahole?
>>19550450this isn't /jp/, bub.
>>19550469Maybe for Kota
>>19550450I just.....what?>>19550425Well thats a shocker. I would have guessed that it was Minna from how the waifuwars turned out. Meh at least you guys did your homework on that.
>>19550498Nope, turns out she really is the most popular.
>>19550425Huh. Thought it would have been the Adorable Cossack.
>>19550498that might have been due to a combination of white knights, trolls (girls like Minna provide more opportunities than stable ones), and other folks going for Minna as opposed to someone more stable.and people are only talking about it now due to PF taking so long with posts.
>>19550498I asked him a long time ago, and it surprised the shit outta me. I had to ask for his shipping address and if he would mind getting a figure of his waifu... then he gave me his shipping address.... Managed to "convince" 3 other fags to throw money at it and we bought it for em last night
>>19550532She's not the one people WaifuShe's the one people adopt
>>19550543I saw that on the online receipt post earlier. Good on ya for getting that for him.
>>19550548I've developed the weird habit of thinking "favorite" when I see "waifu". None of the boards I frequent nowadays use the term often enough to bother correcting myself.
>power outage>45min>laptop battery a shit>haven't timed out of IRCWhat.It's late so I'm going to get us set up for the NEXT TIME because haralrkaf;ladsf
>>19550595Awww. At least swing by the IRc to answer the last hours' worth of questions!:V
>>19550595TESLA'S POWERS ARE LEAKING INTO OUR OWN WORLDOH GOD
>>19550595you do your duty with honor mein friend
>>19550595>power outageDid we anger Tesla in some way?
>>19550523she is isnt she?she should have her own daily dose.
>>19550617I see that martians haven't quite perfected the human form...
>>19550617Wait. Dogs? What?
>>19550617I Don't think i can ever get a boner again now.
>>19550652My boner agrees..... but why yeagertits? Why?
"You were fucking with us the entire time," you say numbly. "No SHIT," Nikolai Tesla replies. "All my life, they called me mad. Insane. Psycopathic. Oh nooo, Tesla, there's no radio signals coming from Mars. Oh nooo, Tesla, you can't make a death ray, it's impossible!" Tesla's gaunt face darkens with old rage. "And then, what happens?""Martians from Mars attack with death rays?""FUCKING A!" Tesla shouts, slamming his fist into the dais as he rises from the floor. "And now that they need me so badly, now that I've been proven right in every single way, well - why not wear the mantle they gave me? Why not give them the mad scientist they wanted so badly? Bastards. Filthy, rotten bastards. Let them sup upon the misery they themselves sowed. Ahaha! HA!""What... about my father?" Yoshika asks. "That's... a long tale, young woman," Tesla says sternly. "He came to me in the late thirties, interesting theories about the interconnectedness of magic and other energy types - magic as a wave, fancy that. Back when nobody would listen to me, he sought me out..."
>>19550678>Tesla trolls superhardGood for him.
>>19550678We owe this man a bee--Wait, Tesla.A coca-cola.
>>19550685I have many fetishes, pregnancy is not one of them.
>>19550678I can respect that.
>>19550617where do you people even find this stuff?actually, nevermind.
>>19550678Oh thank god. He's not batshit insane.
>>19550678Should we let him know of our gnomenclature?
>>19550739He seems smart/wise enough to keep it hidden, sure why not.
>>19550739...how long have you been waiting to use that one?
>>19550709Well, sure, but "no boners, ever again?" Seems a bit extreme.
Before Tesla can say anything more, Ian arrives. That is to say, Ian appears at the door, crosses twenty feet of floorspace in half a second, and has you slammed up against the wall, hands buried in your shirt, before you know what the fuck is going on."Whu?" you marvel."CEREMONY," Ian snarls."We haven't even kissed yet," you admonish him. Kids these days, moving so fast. "MEDAL. CEREMONY," Ian hisses. "You didn't say SHIT about a ceremony. HERE. TODAY." "I.... didn't... what?""Reporters," Ian says, his face turning white. "Cameras. My mother will see. My mother will KNOW. THEY INVITED HER TO THE FUCKING CEREMONY. MY NAME IS ON A GOD-DAMNED PROGRAM.""Reporters?" you ask."There's one outside that wants to interview us for the Stars and God-damned STRIPES!" Ian wails, shaking you. You realize that you're still being hoisted off your feat, no small chore for a man of Ian's comparative build. "Why is this my fault?" you ask plaintively. "It isn't," Ian says, "but god knows you've got it coming for something I didn't catch you at."
>>19550784Oh, Ian. Time to step up.Also, shush. Tesla is talking.
>>19550784... well he's got us there.
>>19550678>Tesla adequately saneI knew it from the first appearance.>>19550739I think he's trustworthy enough. I mean, we DO know a secret of his that can make his life more difficult. The question is WHEN do we tell him? Do we just not give a fuck and let Yoshika in on it too?
>>19550784We fucking TOLD YOU about that! It's not our fault you didn't pay attention!
>>19550784Does this mean you will actually answer my emails planefag?
>>19550767It will probably take a bit but...
>>19550784Ian this isn't about me.It's about perrine.What will she think of you?
>>19550784>"Why is this my fault?" you ask plaintively. >"It isn't," Ian says, "but god knows you've got it coming for something I didn't catch you at."Well he's got us there?
>>19550784Coulda sworn we told 'im when we saw the whole teaching-Meuhfoogee-to-shoot thing. Deaf bastard.
NEXT TIME on SWQ: NOT AS PLANNEDI have no idea when we'll run this next; tentative for Thursday, depending on how much work I get done tomorrow. I ordered a new laptop battery last week, should be here by then. God dammit. Writers, I'll talk to you tomorrow, I just don't have the energy or time to engage in an hour-long round-robin, we'll do that tomorrow. Night, folks. fucking detroit Edison shit power lines fuk>sadfrog.jpg
>>19550784...wait a second. Why would our names be on a program? Since when do they give out PROGRAMS for this sort of thing?Unless...you don't think they're...?
>>19550859Well, that's a shame. See you next time.
>>19550838no no. we dont mention perrine. we dont want him to even THINK of perrine. not until we can shove him his mom and perrine in a room together and lock it.come into a room and throw us up against a wall will he?
>>19550859Good luck Pf.
>>19550859Is your boss Sgt. Foley?
>>19550873You're not suggesting a certain highest honor possible are you? Because that would be a bit much.
>>19550859HEY CUNTBUCKETNICE THREAD
>detroit Edison>EdisonThat sorry sap? He tried to rival TESLA's genius and LOST. Is he getting revenge for our awesome Tesla?!
>>19550931>inb4 WarBondDrive Quest
>>19550931Maybe a bunch of other allied countries want to give us medals for saving their assorted witches arses, so they needed a schedule to keep everything in order.
>>19550955And then they dress us up in a goofy wizard outfit, a la Captain America movie.
>Minna confronts us during ceremony
Here we go.---The ground on the far side of the Martian advance made Karl think of the pictures his father had shown him of the Great War. Once-tall trees have been snapped in half, jagged trunks stabbing into the sky, logs decorating the ground. Pits, dug out by artillery shells, filling with water and becoming mud traps. And there was no grass anywhere. Masers and gas and tanks made sure of that. Wherever the Martians went, the land died. It was a sobering message, that taught you to respect the power that the aliens could bring to bear. It also taught you that they had to be fought. While searching for the radio, they'd dug up as much ammunition as they could carry. They were going to be way, way out of resupply range. If they ran out of bullets, then they were dead: The other men carried Gewehrs, but Karl had been issued an MP-43. Unfortunately, his wasn't the rifle-grenade variant, so he had to make do by appropriating a satchel full of grenades from one of his less fortunate countrymen. Karl thought of the men following him. As they walked through the empty occupied territory, they'd taken the chance to get to know each other's names. Two riflemen, Erich and Finn, both privates. Luis was a corporal. Seems that the higher-ups had the misfortune to be in important places at the time of the attack.
>>19550931That would require a President. Make of that what you will.
>>19550995>Minna gets ordered to award us an Iron cross, so she nails it into our skull
>>19550998"Alright boys, according to this map," this torn, dirty map he had pried out from a ruined trench office, "the witch we're rescuing crashed within a mile of us, so let's split up. We haven't seen any Martians here anyways. Luis, you take Erich and cover this half," pointing at a particularly boring part of the map, "Finn and I will take this half with all the woods. If you find her, whistle. If you find Martians, we're probably all fucked but shoot back anyways."Putting the map away, he stood as straight as he could and tried to create that aura of leadership that the generals could. "We're the only ones out here. If we fail, that witch is dead. If we succeed, we're all gonna be heroes. Hell, might even get some leave!" Karl smirked at that part, trying to rouse up some humor.The other men groaned. The only reason infantrymen like them got leave was if they got shot, and even then it had to be a bad wound. "Fighting wounded" was the term for everyone who didn't quite get hit hard enough to leave, and there were a lot more of them than anyone would be comfortable admitting. They split up and headed to their search zones. They each had half a mile to check, and Karl had selected the forested area, so he'd be spending a lot of time looking behind trunks and hoping the witch wasn't waiting to shoot the first thing to come looking for her. Command had been unable to provide much description about the witch, as she wasn't German, nor was she in a joint wing. Well, a young girl in the middle of Martian territory would be pretty easy to spot, unless she'd done something silly like try to- TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT!
>>19551014Before he knew what was happening, Karl heard the "zwip!" of a bullet rushing by his head. He flung himself to the ground and rolled behind a tree. "Get down! Heavy weapon up front!Luis covering fire, I'll grenade it!" "Sir! That's a machine gun! Martians don't use 'em!""Shit. HEY YOU! HOLD YOUR FUCKING FIRE!"The gunfire stopped. "We're Human! Human!" Karl peeked around the edge of the the tree, and saw what had to be his objective. A redhead girl, looking barely out of her teens, stood up from a pile of fallen logs. Squinting his eyes, he could just make out what seemed to be some kind of uniform. She wasn't German, whatever she was, and that was depressing. Karl had been hoping to rescue a Luftwaffe witch and maybe get a girl out of it, but it seemed that he used all his luck surviving the Martian attack. In any case, now he had to get her out of here, and that was going to be difficult. Heading back the way they came wasn't an option: they'd run right into the Martian lines. Their best option was to head-"I said HEY!"
>>19550893>shove him his mom and perrine in a room together and lock it.
>>19551012Not all the time. If one was at the front, sometimes they'd hand it to an appropriately high ranking officer to award....like the Commander of the Army Air Force, incidentally...
>>19551023Oh right, the witch. At least she spoke German. "Hello. I am Ufz. Karl. My team and I are here to extract you." The witch looked him over, and frowned. "Fucking Germans. They couldn't send anybody else? Not even an Englishman?"WHA-BAM!Dirt clods flew everywhere as as martian shell landed nearby, covering everyone in a fine layer of soil. "A German is fine too!" The girl cried, as she ducked back behind the trees. "Come on Finn! Move it!" Karl and Finn raced towards the fallen logs that had kept the girl safe. They wouldn't stop a direct hit from a mortar, but they'd block shrapnel well enough. They dove into position, pressing themselves against the ground and praying that a shell wouldn't come knocking. Karl saw the witch had her head buried in her knees, which was perfectly fine, but she was sitting upright, which made her vulnerable to lucky shot and shrapnel. So he did what any concerned gentleman would do, and pushed her down in the mud.
Alright guys. First archive since planefag's big break is up: http://www.mediafire.com/?hel7imm78q1uq9bHAHA. Time to wait for Fap to finish posting Strikerless so I can post my stuff.
>>19551039"Hey! What the hell are you doing!""Saving-" WHA-BAM! "your ass! Keep close to the ground, dammit!"After each explosion, there was a flitting through the air as bits of metal tore their way through leaves and grass, as well as a thunking as bits of metal dug into the logs. Karl and Flinn waited out the barrage with the patience of experienced infantrymen, but the witch, whose name they still didn't have, shook badly after each blast. Karl put his arm around her to steady her and offer comfort, but he got a knee to the gut for his effort."Don't you fucking touch me you German!" Another kick and Karl rolled over, holding his guts. "Fucking hell, I'm trying to help you!""If you want to help, then kill aliens and keep your mitts off me!"Calling Finn over to him, Karl started planning a way out of this mess. The martians would either keep shelling them, or call in reinforcements to crush them, so staying put wasn't an option. Judging by the rate of explosions, there was only one mortar, so there probably wasn't anything more than a single group trying to kill them.After the next mortar blast, Finn and Karl made their move. Their lives, and the life of the bit- WITCH behind them, depended on what happened next. (end chp 3)
March 1, 1943 11:00Vancouver, British Columbia In the crimson lobby of the Vancouver hotel, two witches sat waiting to see the head of Pacific Command. The blonde, business-like Rose McNair sat with hands folded in her lap, a professional air about her. To her right, Scarlet Harrison lounged back in her chair staring at the ceiling, mouth agape. Directly in front of them was a very distracted young man filling out forms behind the front desk. Every so often his eyes would drift over to the witches - specifically their bare legs.“How much longeeerrr,” Scarlet groaned.“For once, please try to act your age. We're both about to meet with a general,” Rosie leaned her head back in a vain attempt to look the other witch in the eyes, “at least try not to get yourself into any trouble.” “You know me. No promises. So what's in the envelope, anyways? That bad?”“Here, you might as well take a look. Nothing classified.” Rosie handed the large brown envelope to Scarlet, who quickly opened it and began skimming its contents.“New transfers? Again?”“Not just any. Two aces. Pretty well decorated. Read it.”“Lesee here,” Scarlet's eyes began moving back and forth as she read, “ Last name, uh, Koo-roe-ay? I think that's right. First name Ayaka. Test witch, yada yada, ace, yada yada, flight lieutenant. Not that special.”“And the next one?”
“Wiese,” Scarlet stared at the first name for a few seconds before saying aloud, “Johanna? Isn't that the Kraut we met just before we got to Comox? On the train?”“The one you were smitten with? Yes, that's the one.”“Was not. What's this got to do with coming all the way out here?”“For one, I'm going to try and get an explanation for this. They sent this before you intercepted the skimmers. Something weird is going on. That and we're meeting the witches here.”“You really couldn't have just told me that earlier?”“Wouldn't want you spending an hour fixing your hair to see Miss Weisse, now would we?”“Well fucka-doodle-doo to you too.” Shortly afterwards Major General George Pearkes stepped into the waiting room and motioned for the witches to follow him. As they were being lead through the vibrant halls of the former hotel, Rosie maintained a strict posture while Scarlet greatly admired the Edwardian decor. Ushering them into the hotel room acting as his office, the General stepped behind his desk and drew out a pair of small envelopes.“Before we discuss anything, I must congratulate you ladies. Wing Commander McNair,” he handed each of them their envelopes, “ Squadron Leader Harrison. In keeping with the Joint Fighter Wing traditions, you both are to be promoted. There ought to be more of a show about it, but time is short. Now, to what do I owe the pleasure?”
Scarlet stared at the envelope, mouth hanging open. Rose had to consciously shake herself out of speechlessness.“Erm, sorry, sir, but you said time is short? I hadn't heard of any attacks.”“Sorry, it's nothing. Do go on.”“Yes, well, it's about everything, I suppose. No sign of an attack in nearly a year and suddenly we're getting reinforcements left, right and centre. I trust there's a reasonable explanation?”“As I understand it there were reconnaissance craft sighted just yesterday. Yes?”“Sir, the wing formed over a week ago. Unless we've suddenly got spies in martian command, this all seems highly suspicious.”The General leaned back on his desk and thought for a moment. “You're a good witch and a better leader, McNair, but you've always had one flaw. You could never understand information being above your pay-grade. Especially when it concerns your girls. Not without good reason, of course, but there are some things you just have to accept.”By now Scarlet was looking between the General, Rose and the envelope in quick succession.“Then I'll only ask one more question,” Rose continued, “tell me my girls will be okay. If it doesn't concern me, then it shouldn't concern them.”General Pearkes stared at them in silence for a few moments before speaking. “Good day, Commander. Squadron Leader.”Rose let out a deep sigh, shook her head and bid the General good day before stepping out the door. Scarlet glanced out into the hall and back at the general.“Uh, happy birthday, sir.”A small smile tugged at the man's lips as he thanked her, lasting until he closed the door after she had left. Sitting deeply in the chair behind his desk, the general pulled out a bottle and poured himself a glass of scotch.
At the same time, off the coast of Vancouver Island, pilot Rick Mabbs was having a terrible day.“So, um, Mister Nathaniel,” Riley absentmindedly twirled a strand of hair, “how long have you been flying then?”“About a year now, I'd say. Yourself?”“Oh, just a few months. Stuff back home, y'know?”“OH FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK, WOULD THE TWO OF YOU JUST SHUT UP FOR FIVE GOD DAMNED MINUTES?” The Beaufighter VIF hummed along over the Pacific, joined by a witch on the right wing. For the past three hours the witch and plane's observer, Nathaniel Heyworth, had been flirting non-stop. Nerves were finally being gotten on.“Alright you two. It's about time we started heading back. You can fuck when we're on the ground but not a word until then. Capisce?”“Yes, sir. I mea- wait, no. Tha-” Riley stuttered and fumbled her words. In the rear seat, Nathan was turning bright red. Rick's day was substantially improving.*** Meanwhile, at Station Comox:“Um, do I collect two hundred dollars?”“We're playing snakes and ladders, Woody.”“Is this really all you people do around here? Just sit around and play with the other girls all day?”“Not sure how they do things 'cross tha pawnd', but we like to keep that sort of thing on the down-low over here.”
Back in Vancouver, Scarlet stepped out of the general's office, taking up stride beside her commanding officer. The halls of the old hotel were fairly quite, save for Rosie's continuous grumbling. Several minutes passed before Scarlet decided to speak up.“Something I can do for you, chief?”“This isn't right. Of anyone, Pearkes should have been able to tell us what's going on.”“That's swell, but we've got work to do. Ocean ain't gonna watch itself.”Rosie spun on her heel to face the other witch, eyes stern. “You don't get it, do you? You remember what Wendy use to say?”Scarlet folded her arms and leaned against the wall, expression matching her superior's. “You better have a damn good reason for bringing up the boss. Now what the hell are you trying to say?”“It's,” Rosie suddenly shifted her gaze to the ground, taking a deep breath, “it's like what she used to talk about. Right before the martians came. How they were almost preparing for it. You remember.”“Rumours, Rosie. That's all those are. We were still back at the MB when all of that went down. They're just boosting defences. Routine stuff.”
“So they're going to put more resources out in the ass end of nowhere while the martians are getting ready to cross into England. That's bullshit and you know it. You know what I think?”“I never do.”“I think you know I'm right, but you're too scared to admit it.”“Oh, fuck you. I've gotten my hands dirty before and I can do it again.”“No, you wanted out just as much as I did. You're trying to act all cool like you did right out of flight school. Sure, you can do that now that you have an easy post out here, but put you in the middle of a fight and you're the vet, the old lady. Then people will depend on you, and letting them down scares the shit out of you.”“Yeah, sure thing Freud. We have a Jap and a Kraut to meet and it's a long flight home. It'll be dark by the time you shut up.”“Run away as much as you want, but don't come crying to me when it all comes down.”“You keep talking but nobody's list-en-ing~”
Rounding a corner and arriving at the front lobby, the pair found the two foreign witches chatting to themselves near the door. The taller of the two, a mellow-looking brunette in an olive green sweater, was looking somewhat puzzled, while the other, a short-haired Asian witch in a strange combination of a poncho and a bikini, seemed incredibly frustrated.“The point is that that striker is already a what? Four year old design? At least. It makes no sense not to ask for something better, god knows you're in the position for it. At the very least you should find one of the newer versions if you insist on keeping the same one.”The taller witch stepped back, stroking her chin in thought. “Wouldn't that be impressive for it to remain relevant for four years, then? Any shortcomings could be supplemented with magi-”“Magic schmagic! That's the problem with you kids these days. Magic this, magic that, but when magic fails it all comes down to your own skill and the quality of your striker.” The Japanese witch gestured wildly, flailing and pointing with great enthusiasm. Scarlet had managed to sneak behind the German witch and leaned against the wall as she announced her presence.“Correct me if I'm wrong, but if you're at ten thousand feet and your magic fails,” she stepped around the two startled witches, “it would all just come down, no?”“Which is why it would be handy to have built-in parachutes, like I keep suggesting, but no,” Ayaka waved her finger in the air, “the dinky little crystal-thing will break your fall. Idiots. Who are you, anyway?”“Scarlet Harrison, Squadron Leader. You're Crowy, I take it?”“Kuroe, yes, and whe- Oh.” Everyone turned to face Rosie, who was now taking long, purposeful strides over to the group.
“AHEM! And I am Rose McNair, commanding officer of the five-oh-nineth. You must be Ayaka,” Rosie took up her professional tone, shaking the hands of the two witches, “and Johanna, we've met before, but a pleasure nonetheless. Ready to go then, ladies?”“Our stuff is being sent ahead of us and our strikers should be at Jericho. Johanna?” “Yes, I'm fine,” Johanna replied, taking the hands of the two Canadian witches, “it's so nice to see you both again. On such good terms as well.”Scarlet glanced down at her taken hand then back up to the witch. “So, uh, h-how exactly did you end up in our unit, anyways?”“Ah! Well, the long and short of it is I could either keep sitting around doing nothing, or help fight. Naturally, I wanted to fly again, but when they told me which unit I would be serving with and that I was allowed to make small demands, there was no way I could turn them down.”Rosie tensed for a moment. “Erm, when exactly did they contact you about this?”“Well, it must have been at least before Christmas. Why?”“Nothing. It's nothing. Shall we go then?” Rain pelted the busy streets of Vancouver as the quartet of witches exited the hotel. Scarlet sighed and mimed opening an umbrella, forming a shield overhead large enough to cover the four witches. After a short jaunt to the car, it wasn't long before the witches arrived at Jericho Airfield and were up in the air, Scarlet still holding her shield-umbrella.
March 1st, 1943 12:30RCAF Station Comox, Vancouver Island Rick Mabbs sat alone in the huge hangar of Sation Comox listening to the panging of rain upon the metal roof. Every now and then he glanced down to the papers in his hand and shook his head. What seemed like hours went by, whether they were minutes or even seconds, know one knew. Rick simply sat in the dark, listening to the rain, and thinking. Eventually his thought was interrupted by the side-door opening. “Ah! Oh, hey Rick. It's just you,” Scarlet quietly stepped into the mostly-empty hangar, putting her shield down as she closed the door. “You scared me there. Just came ahead to make sure the door to the extra hangar was open. We got a couple new girls coming in.”Rick stood up and stretched, wincing as joints popped. “Shit. What time is it?”“ ' bout half past twelve, I'd say. What're you sitting around here for?” Scarlet waved an accusing finger at him.“Was waiting for Rose. Got some new orders in.”“Oh! Oh! Lemme see!” Scarlet shouted as she ran up to him.“Not so fast, shrimp. These are for Rosie. We're the same rank, so you can't order me around.”Scarlet put on her most wicked grin and whipped out her own papers. “Not any more. I out-rank you now, bitch! Now gimme!”
Sighing, Rick handed over the bundle of papers in his arm as delicately as a baby. “Transfer orders. Me and the boys are shipping up north, to Prince Rupert. You've got more girls, not to mention a night-witch, so I guess you don't need us schmucks around anymore. Move the Americans over and you've got the whole building to yourselves.”“Shit, Ricky. You guys want to head out into town tonight?” Scarlet suddenly looked more sullen. “Y'know, grab a few drinks, give you a proper farewell?”“Nah. They want us to get there while it's dark. We're supposed to head out as soon as a senior officer gets the orders. Which,” Rick reached out and poked the slightly shorter girl in the forehead, “is you now, kiddo. So I'm gonna go grab the fellas and get outta you ladies' way. See ya 'round, kid.”“Yeah, sure. Later Ricky.” Scarlet gave a reluctant wave as Rick ran out the door, holding his coat over his head. Scarlet quietly stepped over and hit the switch operating the main hangar door. This time, it was Scarlet's turn to sit in the empty hangar, staring outside at as the rain washed the airfield. It wasn't long before her fellow witches flew in, but not before a trio of Beaufighters had already left. After handing off the paperwork to Rose, Scarlet stepped outside in the rain and stared at the sky.-------End of part three.
>>195511508/10, would scroll through again
>>19551150>few drinks, proper farewellShe wanted to fuck his brains out before he was gone forever.
>>19551307The wall keeps out Mongolians.
>>19551307At least hes doing more than you are by far panzer.
>>19551372While you are right, he also has it all prepared ahead of time, I have to deal with lovely people like you deciding which vagoo to stick your witchpenis into, so cut me some slack please?
>>19551407>witchpenisWhy do we not use this word more often?
>>19551407>Look up when SWQ Gm's are posting on IRC or wherever. >Oh look TWQ on Tuesday/Thrusday, better remember to show up and set aside time for it because i think its a good quest.>Time comes and goes no TWQ.>5 times in a row now.Sorry if my patience frays a little bit after that.
Any Boatz and/or North Africa this week?
>>19551407Suck it up, and railroad into a threesome with our husband and the delicious... crap. Polish witch?
>>19551468Looks like no. Too bad.
>>19551468Prolly no boats, maybe no T&L. I'm still working on it and deciding whether I want to post what I have or wait and post everything on Thursday. I'm leaning towards the former, though. It's gonna be a few minutes though. Thought the quest was gonna go a bit later than it did.
>>19551468No raisin boats. Thunder and Lightning maybe. Writefag is writing.
>>19551468North Africa is coming. Boatz is delayed until NEXT TIME.
>>19551451Because they are magically delicious>>19551462You are right, and I am horrible at keeping dates, but I had some shit I needed to talk about with planefag, then lolconvention, then lolwedding, when I finnally set a date, planefag fucking runs his quest (TLDR, I WAS GONNA RUN IT TODAY, BUT PLANEFAG PLANEFAGGED)
Well, new here, and here's my part in this universe. Time for some commandos.---October 23, 1942Tonight was clear. There were no clouds covering up the stars, and the only light source was from the moon. The only thing disrupting this scene was a lone C-47 flying fairly low from the ground.Captain Patrick Jackson looked around the fuselage. Five men, from different countries, were with him in the plane, looking around. On their shoulders: the flags of the countries from where they came from, and another badge, labeled “CTF 62”: Combined Task Force 62. He looked at the top of his right arm, where the Stars and Stripes were showing in full color. Jackson wondered how much time it took to put the 48 stars on the patch before his mind drifted into the present situation.Soon, he would be in France, behind enemy lines as a commando. He thought about the possibility of everyone making it out tonight, able to live and fight another day. Jackson also thought about the stories he had heard, of entire commando units going in and never being heard from again. He hoped for the former, especially considering that this was the first time he led a mission like this.
>>19551509Im not mad at you for it, im just saying theres no need to go around telling other writefags, LOLOLOLOLOLOL TL'DR LOLOLOLOLOLOL, is all.Also im still waiting. It was yours and Kotters quests that got me back into this after all and they havent gone to shit yet so ill still follow.
>>19551539All these thoughts were interrupted by the appearance of a red light inside the plane. Jackson knew what that meant.“Everyone, get ready!” All of them stood up, and attached their parachute hooks to the bar. They checked their harnesses, webbing, leg bags, rucksacks, and other things for a couple of seconds before Jackson gave to order to sound off.“Ready!”The word came down the line; everyone was good to go. Jackson nodded to the others in the plane and stood in front of the open door, waiting for the light to go green, waiting to jump.Five seconds…ten...Jackson counted how long it would take for the light to go green. Barely fifteen seconds passed.Green light.“Let’s go!” Jackson yelled before taking the first step off of the C-47. Within seconds, he was going down towards the ground. The others followed his lead, and they were all going towards the ground.One of the first Americans to drop into France, if not the first, Jackson thought. Now that would be a story to tell.He looked down and he realized that the distinction would have to wait, as he was heading straight into some trees.
>>19551546“God damn it…” Jackson muttered to himself, brushing off the leaves and small branches.“Snagged in a tree...joy. Now where’s my-" On the ground was the leg bag that contained his primary weapon and ammo.Great, stuck in a tree, leg bag’s down on the ground. Going well. Going well.Taking a look on the ground, Jackson guessed that he wasn’t far off from the ground. No need to cut the lines, releasing the harness would do the trick. But a sudden rustle followed by incoherent garble stopped him.Squids, coming towards him.Two Martians were approaching the leg bag, curious to what it was. Stopping right below Jackson, one of them picked the bag up and turned it around. The one holding the bag looked straight at the other Martian and said some garble, to which the other one put up two tentacles as if it didn’t know what it was at all.They’re probably talking to each other, Jackson thought, but if they just decide to look up…He could see that they had their standard heat rays, perfect for toasting a stuck guy up on a tree. The Martians didn’t seem like they were going to leave soon, too. And while Jackson had his M1911A1 pistol with him, he knew that he couldn’t take both of them out quickly enough. Might as well fall on top of the one directly below him and then deal with the other one. Quietly, Jackson reached for his harness release.“Now all I need is a good distraction….” Jackson didn’t have to wait long. The wind started to blow, rustling the bushes and giving him the distraction he needed.
>>19551542> It was yours and Kotters quests that got me back into this after allWhat the hell happened?
>>19551567He must be that buttmad trudefag.
>>19551558The Martian carrying the leg bag below only felt the weight of a human falling down on him, feet first, before crashing down onto the ground unconscious. The second Martian turned around in surprise, barely managing to point its heat ray at the human before the human tackled it down onto the ground.It tried to hold the human off, struggling to reach the heat ray gun that lay nearby him. The human was trying its best to hold down all of its tentacles, and it was doing a good job doing so. A second later, the Martian could see a glint. The human was holding a short edged weapon in its right hand. Primitive, but it could still kill. Using some of its tentacles, the Martian held back the arm, and wrapped whatever tentacles were left onto the human’s neck. The Martian hoped to break the human’s neck.It failed to notice the human’s left arm grabbing a rock nearby. The human smashed the right side of its head, the pain enough to loosen the Martian’s grip on both the human’s right arm and neck. The last thing the Martian ever noticed was the immense pain the blade caused as it repeatedly went into its face.After a few seconds, Jackson stood up and pulled the knife out of the Martian’s head, sure that the Martian had stopped squirming around. Fuck, that thing had a grip.Jackson turned back to the still-unconscious Martian, stabbing it a couple of times to make sure it didn’t get up.
>>19551567Magic.And Socks. Socks makes everything better.Need more Socks.
>>19551542Aye, tis mostly jealousy that they can write so well without needed to think detains out on the fly
>>19551577Jackson took his pistol out and scanned the area to make sure that no other Martian was around before approaching his leg bag and opening it up. Inside, there were two No. 77 grenades, two No. 69 grenades, and a Thompson submachine gun, along with several magazines. Jackson loaded one magazine into the Thompson before with the rest of the ammo and equipment before a voice called out to him. “Fox.”Jackson quickly turned around, yelling “Hound!” in a panicked whisper and aiming his Thompson straight behind him. It was a man aiming a Lee-Enfield rifle straight at Jackson. He had a serious look upon his face, but there was a sense of calmness around him. The tricolor flag of Italy, complete with green, red, and white in vertical stripes, was attached. “Jesus.” Jackson said both in relief and frustration as he lowered the Thompson. Jackson recognized the man. It was one of his men, Corporale Enrico Maldini, the team’s medic.“Maldini, you scared the fuck outta me.” It took a few more seconds for the shock to dissipate from Jackson.“Sorry, sir,” Maldini said calmly, lowering the rifle in his hands before approaching Jackson.“So, how’d you know I was stuck here? Pure chance?”“No. We all saw your chute go into the trees. I volunteered to go find you and help, if need be.”
>>19551594 “Well, thanks for the help.” Jackson said, nodding in approval.Maldini noticed the Martians, with a number of stab wounds between them and a pool of greenish blood forming.“Martian patrol came by?”“Yeah. See any others?” Jackson asked, turning his attention to the leg bag. He crouched down and reached for his supplies“Yes, we’ve already encountered them.”“Christ…” Having Martians around was never a good sign. “Alright, cover me while I finish loading up; dunno if the squids are looking for their buddies.”Maldini took aim, making sure that if any other Martians came through the road, he would be ready to put a round in them.Jackson took everything he needed out of the bag before checking around and throwing the bag out of the way.“Still, the fact that there’s Martians here…”“I know, Captain.” Maldini replied. “You think they found them?”Jackson took a moment to think before answering Maldini. “Maybe, but we don’t know that for sure. Anyway, where are the others?” “In a clearing, sir, not far from here.” “Good. Help me get these bodies off the road first, then lead the way.”“Understood, sir.”Both of them dragged the bodies out of the road before Maldini signaled Jackson to follow him into the forest.
>>19551599“We’re almost there.” Maldini said to Jackson.A few minutes of going through the forest and there it was: a clearing. Both of them walked slowly towards it, guns raised.Closer in, Jackson could see two people, one with a Thompson, one with a Bren light machine gun. Both of them were standing guard, watching for anything that might come out from the forest.“Let’s introduce ourselves, Maldini.”Maldini only nodded before both of them stepped closer and closer.The two men in the grove heard Jackson and Maldini approach.“Fox!” “Hound, hound.” Jackson replied before stepping out of the forest with Maldini right behind him.“Oh…” A sigh of relief came out from the man with the Thompson. He was a nervous-looking fellow, shifting about as if something might appear at any moment and attack him. The red flag of the Soviet Union, with the gold hammer and sickle, was attached to his uniform. It was Serzhant Yuri Tarasov, the combat engineer of the team. “…Good seeing you, Jackson, Maldini. Anything happen?”“Encountered a Martian patrol nearby. Took them out.” Jackson said. “You?”“Same here,” said the man with the Bren. He was a very young man, younger than everyone else in the group. The Union Jack was present. It was Lance Corporal Milton Ward, the gunner of the group.“Had to show them how good we are with our pointy sticks.” Ward said, holding up his Fairbairn-Sykes knife. “Still…” Ward sheathed the blade back and continued on talking. “I don’t like how the situation’s going now. With the Martians here, our fellows from No. 1 probably kicked it.”