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File: 1336624807136.jpg-(295 KB, 1000x700, 5e47a01442577ff9d6a0245bf1e4078a263000ca.jpg)
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/tg/-san, can you teach me to love?

...physically?
>>
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Nasally inhale 200 mg of this, and call me in the morning.
>>
What like, in physics terms?

Do you have a calculator?
>>
>>19048989
She IS a calculator!
>>
Ah, Spring! When a young Necron's fancy turns to love!
>>
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Let me explain this in a way you'll understand.

>Anon used leer
>Gurl became confused
>Anon used charm
>Gurl became charmed
>Anon used sleeping powder
>gurl fell asleep
>Anon used harden
>anon used pound
>anon used pound
>Anon used pound
>...
>anon has fainted
>>
Next time you see someone you care about, encircle the with your arms and squeeze gently, make sure to release before causimg harm and/or sensations of or similar to pain. This is called a hug.
>>
First do you have a penis?
If yes, can you find a hole?
If yes, trust vigorously into said hole.
>>
Xeno, don't give in to peer pressure! You're too young to be having sex!
>>
>Get out bed
>Check on /tg/
>Xeno thread right on the first page
>Morning ruined

Welp...back to bed.
>>
>>19049146
if something cause displeasure to you then it cannot be bad.
>>
I wish I could tell you.
As an Astartes, I want to love, too.
I still remember my past before this.
Such are my days with the scorpions.
>>
>>19048968
>Xeno
>hugs follow the "rending" rule
>kisses follow the "entropic strike" rule

I'd rather not.
>>
>>19049009
Then where are her buttons? You know, to turn her on...
>>
File: 1336644359612.png-(86 KB, 300x314, 300px-TechPriest.png)
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It's quite simple, insert Rod A into Slot A, can also be inserted into Slot B. Remove Rod A and reinsert it into the selected slot. Repeat untill Orgasm.exe is executed. Should you choose Slot A it is recommended you have Anti-Pregnancy software installed otherwise Pregnancy.zip will open and load Baby.file, unless this is what you intended. Be sure to scan for viruses before and after.
>>
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>>19051878
strange...
>>
>>19051878
You forgot a couple things. First of all, get some anti-virus software installed. You can get some baaaad shit, what with Nurgle doing like he does.
second of all, you need to sanctify both rod a and your selected slot with offerings to the machine god.
>>
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>>19048968
I'm sure that Drone can.
>>
>>19048968
But, Xeno, you are the only creature in the grimdarkness of the distant future who knows how to love.
>>
>>19051878
What about the Sound Port?
>>
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>>19052208
Xeno certainly has one.
>>
Why is there no Xeno Carameldanse .gif?
>>
>>19052733
I tried to make one, but it takes time, and requires precision.
>>
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I believe in you, >>19052752! You can do it!
>>
for the love of god, someone say that they have that screencap of bjorn the fell-handed explaining the birds and the bees to a scout!
>>
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Birds? Bees?
>>
>>19052818
They're like your itty bitty beetles, but squishier.
>>
ITTY BITTY BEETLE

ITTY BITTY BOAT

TWINKIE HOUSE
>>
>>19053074
I don't believe it!
>>
>>19053094

HABEEB IT!
>>
File: 1336656934096.png-(183 KB, 700x1000, 1335244169246.png)
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>>19052818
Do I have to teach you everything?
>>
>>19053074
>>19053094
>>19053136

Did I just travel back in time? I haven't seen that meme in years.
>>
>>19053074
>itty bitty bug

FTFY
>>
>>19053175
YOU WENT BACK IN TIME.
TO OLD /b/ ARE YOU MANLY ENOUGH TO SAVE IT?!
>>
>>19053559
Yeah, no, that future refuses to change.
>>
>>19053571
Oh well then, have a beer.
>>
Will Xeno ever find true love?
>>
>>19053925
Signs point to 'no.'
>>
Anyone remember the Necron rapefiction?
>>
>>19054650
Necrons can't rape! They have no penises.
>>
File: 1336679235291.jpg-(99 KB, 450x522, xenokiss.jpg)
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>>19053925
What if "true love" spells "Xeno"?
>>
>>19056322
What does that even mean?
>>
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>>19056460
Xeno is love. All of it.
>>
What is love?
>>
>>19057662
BABY DON'T HURT ME!
>>
File: 1336685590493.jpg-(56 KB, 300x300, xenoooo.jpg)
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>>19057662
Warrior don't hurt me
>>
>>19057675

DONT HURT ME
>>
>>19057675
>>19057679
>>19057685
No more.
>>
File: 1336698136350.jpg-(73 KB, 300x300, xenopop.jpg)
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Benoxump
>>
>>19060033
Don't lose your head, Xeno!
>>
>>19051861
Well, her braid is some sort of switch.
>>
Tug braid
Receive scarabs
>>
File: 1336734712213.png-(263 KB, 753x564, 1331592868826.png)
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Please do not take these scarabs.
>>
>>19049028
Invalid!

That was 5 moves, you only get 4!
>>
>>19065487
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.

WHAT HAVE YOU DOOOOOOOOONE
>>
>>19065487

We went over this yesterday. Noh isn't 40K, she is a Norse goddess, not your xenocrossover waifu.
>>
Who's Noh?
>>
>>19068015
She's a little girl who doesn't want you to take that magical sword and that enchanted chainmail.

That's all.
>>
>>19067427
Actually, she was originally a construct, she was re-imagined into a Norse goddess, and she totally tried bashing in Loki's skull.
>>
>>19068015
Don't Noh.
>>
>>19051878
Error: pregnancy detected. (A)bort / (R)etry / (I)gnore
>>
File: 1336764333890.jpg-(43 KB, 420x599, ThatNoh.jpg)
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>>19068041

After Loki got abused by ravens. And a giant. And a snowbank. And then another raven. Bird rape clearly happened.

http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Noh
>>
File: 1336765553001.jpg-(792 KB, 1457x3633, 2106803.jpg)
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BUmp
>>
File: 1336766355142.jpg-(90 KB, 390x390, teenage tau.jpg)
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>>19069051
No. Fuck no. Everytime that picture gets re-done, it's for the worse. At first she was naked, then the drawfag added ugly panties, then he made her skinny, and now this happens.

NO!

Look, you're scaring little tau girls.
>>
>>19069182
>fatty hips
>big ass
>class I obesity
you must be a black guy, bro?
>>
File: 1336768568954.jpg-(212 KB, 600x1000, tau hourglass.jpg)
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>>19069466
You call dat "class 1 obesity", I call dat "hourglass".

Are you a girl or something?
>>
File: 1336768850044.png-(204 KB, 361x348, the boys.png)
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>>19069521
Dat ass.
>>
File: 1336768971431.jpg-(161 KB, 1000x1000, tic-tac.jpg)
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bzzzzz
>>
>>19069521
I can call that "fat as my first trolling".
>Are you a girl or something?
Why do you think that?
>>
>>19069613
because apparently, since the late 00s, having hips=fat. That's why you no longer see models with decent hips, and why girls try to be skinny instead of being nicely shaped. Since many guys still think that wide hips are hot, I deduce from it that, if you think that hips=obese, it is statistically more likely for you to be a girl.
>>
>>19069664
Fa/tg/uy makes a fair point
>>
File: 1336770142498.jpg-(49 KB, 300x300, xeno fmop.jpg)
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Fortunately, there's still Xeno and her robo-hips from space.
>>
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>>19069664
Lol a girl in tg drawing tau female? only picrelated.
Also you told everything right. But more ore less skinny would be better for this character.
>>
>>19069742
what? which character? what the hell are you trying to say?
>>
>>19069742
I want her to sit on my face
>>
>>19069664
Models don't have decent hips because the fashion industry likes living coat hangers and not fashion that actually accentuates the human form
>>
>>19069949
I know that. Which designer literally said that he wanted that, again?

Anyway, I can understand it when it comes to actual artistic designing, but it becomes really problematic when even underwear models lack curves.
>>
dem robohips
>>
File: 1336800261752.jpg-(53 KB, 320x320, 1332620625391.jpg)
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time to wake up.
>>
>>19074779
...is she sucking her thumb?
>>
>>19074830
Yes, she's a little girl, after all.
>>
>>19069855
http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Shlicktau
>>
>>19078026
It's not Schlicktau, it's just an Earth Caste girl. That's why she's curvier.
>>
File: 1336840966784.jpg-(108 KB, 1128x730, ohthefluffstheyareachangin.jpg)
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Only certain people can.
>>
>>19078730

Xeno is her own faction.
>>
>>19079252
Yes, "Xeno's super-fun adventure club of friendship".
>>
>>19079347
For Girls.
>>
File: 1336846260889.jpg-(55 KB, 725x291, 1321103310952.jpg)
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/tg/ you never cease to amaze
>>
>>19079383
No, not only. I mean, she's got a fucking spehss mehreen in it.
>>
>>19079505

I'm pretty sure Warrior-Kun and the Slann are guys too.
>>
>>19079347
That will be the name of her dynasty. If she manages to find a handful of other planets, the galactic maps will have a small area labelled as "Xeno's super-fun adventure club of friendship".

>>19079512
Maybe Drone, too, but it's a but ambiguous. It depends on the stories.
>>
>>19079512
How can you tell?
>>
>>19079546
because they're referred to as "he".
>>
Shadow's a girl. So is Weaver.
>>
>>19079546

Them being referred to as 'he' in the narration, mainly.
>>
>>19079572
Yes, Core too, apparently.
>>
Isn't Shadow a wraith? How can a wraith into gender?
>>
>implying /tg/ isn't a bunch of eunuchs who go into a frenzy of rage at the thought of having sex
>>
>>19080333
That explains a lot.
>>
>>19080333
I think it's 50-50 traps and eunuchs.
>>
Shas is a confirmed girl. Don't know about the rest of the board.
>>
>>19085432
I am not. I just incorporate a lot of mother-daughter relationship stuff into my writing.
>>
Lol a bunch of faggots itt.
>>
File: 1336911237674.png-(96 KB, 312x205, Capture d’écran 2012-05-06 (...).png)
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>>19086363
No, but you are a faggot. Lol, indeed.
>>19085789
Silence, perfidious woman, you write like a girl. Go wash my pants.
>>
At a minimum, I think we can all accept that Shas thinks she's a girl
>>
>>19089591
Or the reverse.
>>
>>19089605
>>19089591
Who cares about the gender of the idiot who spawned the thing called Xeno.

She/He deserve to be thrown in a shuttle and flown to the hellhole of Ag'ni.
>>
>>19089631
Hey, TIDF, I know you're trying to keep up appearances and all, but you are aware that every single time you reply to one of these Xeno threads with something about how abominable a character Xeno is, or how terrible a person Shas is for writing her, you come across like the little kid on the playground that throws mud at the little girl because he has a crush... right? Don't get me wrong! I totally get that you're deep into the internet roleplaying, pretending to be a tau, but this just makes you look kind of juvenile. Food for thought.
>>
>>19090076
>kind of juvenile
Then it's high-grade tau roleplaying.
>>
Wait, you mean TIDF isn't really a Tau?
>>
>>19090274
He sometimes makes mistakes such as calling humans "humans" instead of "gue'las". He also claims to be part of the Water Caste even though his little sister is obviously an Earth Caste. The answer is clear: he was adopted, and pretended to be a tau so that he would be accepted faster by them.

A sad, tragic story. In a way, he's like Superman, or Goku, except that he sucks at it.
>>
File: 1336923556642.jpg-(236 KB, 700x1300, tgwaifus.jpg)
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Which is your waifu, /tg/? Decide now.
>>
>>19090387
Oh, Xeno, you look so silly without eyes. I choose you.
>>
>>19090076
Well, Xeno has cottees and I don't like her so she better stop asking me to be her friend or I'll push her down I swear!

>>19090303
The Tau use both terms when referring to Homo-Sapiens. Usually when the Tau is friendly to a Homo-Sapien he will call him ''Human''. If the Tau feels neutral or angry towards a Homo-Sapien he will call him ''Gue'la''.

>He also claims to be part of the Water Caste even though his little sister is obviously an Earth Caste

Dal'yth is a queer place. That is all I will say.
>>
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“Salutation, Humans. Observe your Emperor. Return focus to me. Reobserve your Emperor. Return focus to me. Regretfully, your Emperor is not me. However, were he to cease employing archaic technology and upgrade to a shiny metallic body, he may resemble me. Direct observation down. Return observation to neutral level. What is your position? You are located on a battleship with the Phaeron your Emperor could resemble. What are you equipped with? Return focus to me. I have it, it is a Tesseract Labyrinth containing those two Primarchs you revere. Observe again. The Primarchs are now C’tan star gods. Anything is possible when your leader is an ageless immortal robot who wields unfathomable technologies that can extinguish entire star systems and not a lifeless husk of what was once a mere mortal. I am embarked upon a Catacomb Command Barge.”
>>
>>19090387
I will take Elesh Necron. Though her necrodermis is hard and unyielding to my caresses. Her inability to get through doors, or put on a shirt without adorable embarrassment has found her a place in my heart.
>>
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>>19090456
He's back!
>>
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Reanimation protocol engaged.
>>
>>19090387
Weird. Nice idea, but sadly I find each less cool than they normally are.
>>
Elesh Necron is pretty neat.
>>
>>19090387
When was this picture created?!
>>
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Flesh instead of metal? Preposterous!
>>
Oh, wow, is this thread still up?
>>
>>19095909
two weeks ago, for a bikini contest thread that was deleted.
>>
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>>
more Tau girls please? you know, for the Greater Good?
>>
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For the guy who asked, the Day Bjorn taught Sex-ED
>>
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>>19098911
No.
>>
File: 1337000423109.gif-(74 KB, 500x500, jiggly xeno.gif)
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Xeno is the blueberriest.
>>
>>19098693
I saw that thread, but didn't get to it in time. I wish more OC was allowed.

I'm betting it wasn't NSFW.
>>
I'm actually a little surprised that this thread hasn't been pruned yet.
>>
File: 1337029580612.jpg-(65 KB, 300x300, 1333749878727.jpg)
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What's a pruned? Is it candy?
>>
>>19103641
Unfortunately, it isn't; But hey, if you meet a Herald of Transmogrification, you can always ask him to invent new types of candy.
>>
I kinda feel like if Core had a body, she'd look like Elesh Necron.
>>
>>19106103
Why?
>>
>>19106110
Why not?
>>
>>19106423
I figured that with a name like this, she'd look more like Glados.
>>
>>19106439
But GLaDOS doesn't have a body.
>>
>>19106446
then call it a "chassis".
>>
>>19066596

Divided by zero. Or should that be "divided by Xenoh"??
>>
>>19103641
Why do you have vent slits on your chest, Xeno? Is it because you are so smoking hot?
>>
>>19049038
"Hole, here. I'm leaving my money with you, and my journal with all my secrets in it. I trust you so hard."
>>
I have written a love haiku
for you.


dirty xeno wench
you will love prometheum
you scream as you burn
>>
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>>19107653
Xeno says thanks!
>>
>>19107653
Don't be so tsun-tsun, Anon-kun!
>>
>>19107671

i am not tsun-tsun!
i hate all your kind, xeno
Emperor's contempt!!!!
>>
>>19107700
Xeno has no actual kind, she's just some kind of moé robo-blueberry.
>>
Roboberry?
>>
>>19107719


moe blueberry
whatever it is, will burn
for the emperor
>>
I like that Xeno plays Yu-Gi-Oh now, for some reason.
>>
>>19112984
and despite being the taucron rider, she can't even ride a jetbike properly.
>>
Because her hooves can't reach the pedals!
>>
>>19107663

Xeno should get it on with Warrior-kun. He's always pulling her out of one mess or another.

Or....is Warrior-kun friendzoned??
>>
>>19117812
Everyone, except maybe Drone, is friendzoned.

And so far, Warrior-kun didn't really pull her out of the mess, he helped her progress into it.
>>
>>19117878

But does Drone even have a penis to sex up Xeno?
>>
>>19118435
behold
>>19051906
>>
Warrior's already got a girlfriend, anyway. She's just in stasis. Maybe even pre-biotransference.
>>
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>>19048986
Nasally? What does that mean?
>>
>>19119059
Absolutely nothing, you don't have a nose.
>>
No, she's got that nasal slit / flux capacitor. You can still put cocaine in that, right?
>>
Who the hell archived this shit?
>>
This thread is undying!
>>
Like Xeno, this thread is an immortal killer robot.
>>
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>>19125202
Xeno is not a killer robot, she is a love machine.
>>
File: 1337185946566.jpg-(88 KB, 600x709, 905f6752f2a8581c5c2b8f47c69d75(...).jpg)
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Oooh, I'm just a love machine and I don't work for nobody but you! Yeah, I'm just a love machine! A hugging, kissing fiend!
>>
>>19125202
Is it also cute and female?
>>
>>19127994
I'm afraid not, it's on /tg/.

But it's blue, and, let's see... it's stupid... and... it's FUNKY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmqHs_6VSzQ
>>
Xeno is like /tg/'s little sister. Always sticking around, not doing anything constructive, even bothering the serious grown-ups doing serious things with her antics, but adorable and strangely arousing.

And she's also blue, like the background.
>>
Blue is lucky.
>>
>>19069051
>i don't know what anatomy is: the picture
>>
>>19130482
Better anatomy than Rob Liefeld.
>>
>>19130522
A drunk monkey does anatomy better than Liefeld.
>>
>>19069182
yeah, uh, little tau musclegirls with big tits.

Is -4str Xeno even possible?
>>
>>19128460
>little sister
>strangely arousing
Oh /tg/
>>
>>19069742

ARRRGHHH MY EYESSSSS
FUCK YOU MY EYESSSSS!!!!
>>
>>19135456
It's Shas!


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