Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1315779465.jpg-(10 KB, 250x243, computer tan.jpg)
    10 KB Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:17 No.16262595  
    So in Paranoia, Friend Computer is in America, and I've heard there's a second computer in Russia, where sadness is mandatory.

    I've had a thought for my latest game to throw at my players.
    There is another computer similar to Friend Computer, except it exists in Japan.
    It calls itself Computer-Tan. It has only a collection of Moe-Animes to try and base society around. Kawaii is Mandatory.

    Thoughts? Suggestions? Opinions? OP is a faggot?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:19 No.16262606
    >OP is a faggot?
    OP is a faggot.

    Not even entertainingly so.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:19 No.16262607
    OP is a faggot, but his anime club might get a kick out of it.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:23 No.16262643
    >3rd Friend Computer in JAPAN
    >collection of Moe-Animes
    >Kawaii is Mandatory.
    cannot WAT hard enough to this.
    As little as i know about the setting, on COMMON SENSE ALONE I can tell you this is stupid. an I have yet to sit down and download one pdf of paranoia material.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:26 No.16262654
    Brotip: Paranoia is supposed to be stupid.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:26 No.16262660
    Unless you plan on having the other Computers sending an army of trouble shooters to murder the fuck out of it, NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

    So yeah. Quit trollin.
    >except retarran
    Not EVEN retarran.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:26 No.16262662
    Based on these responses, I think this would be perfect for Paranoia. Godspeed, OP.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:28 No.16262681
    >Peron cativisi
    Put another computer in South America, where sleaze is mandatory.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:34 No.16262720
         File1315780440.jpg-(44 KB, 600x416, bueno2_super.jpg)
    44 KB
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:36 No.16262745
    honestly? your idea isn't serious enough. yes, Paranoia can be played for laughs but it can also be really dark at times. my suggestion:
    mandatory waifu/husbando. everyone has a digital avatar assigned to them. they have to care for it, share meals, ect. every avatar is of course controlled by the Computer. it's programming tells it that anime girlfriends are preferable to 3D pig disgusting so human-human marriage is outlawed.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:37 No.16262749
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:38 No.16262762
    Paranoia is meant to be science FICTION.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:38 No.16262764
    That sounds exactly the kind of tone I was going for yes.
    The one exception, which allows the population to sustain itself, involves multiple women being placed in violent competition over the male least interested in having sex.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:38 No.16262765
    First off OP, you know nothing of Paranoia lore... what little there is of it. Its highly restricted.

    Second, I approve.

    Anyone who says you shouldn't do something in Paranoia, that just means you just need to do it harder.
    I've sent my troubleshooters to THE FUCKING MOON
    Why? Cause its a big ass rock hanging over Alpha Complex. It might fall or something.
    Why happened there?
    Space Wizard.
    No survivors.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:40 No.16262782
    You are a good GM.

    I approve of this Idea. It's basically Tropico.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:41 No.16262791
    sounds exactly like MaidRPG
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:42 No.16262803
    There also needs to be a Computer in Britain, where Apathy is mandatory. Or not, I don't care.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:43 No.16262805
    Fuck you. I'm the best damn GM ever.
    My players complained about lack of things to shoot.
    You know what I did?
    That's right. Bees. Thousands of them in one room. And the troubleshooter's task was to name and organize them all.
    You know why I made it bees. One of the troubleshooters is deathly afraid of Yellow.
    There were no [/tg/needspoilers] bee [///tg/needspoilers] survivors.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:45 No.16262818
         File1315781101.jpg-(39 KB, 250x160, bruce campell fuck yeah.jpg)
    39 KB

    >Space Wizard.

    I approve of this, only because it's furthering the idea that there is a Wizard War for control of the moon that has been raging for the past three-thousand-years.

    Why is there a Wizard War on the moon? Because we all know that once a Wizard gets strong enough they will eventually want a moon base. Since there's already a bunch of other wizard with that same plan, Wizard War for control of the moon!
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:45 No.16262820
    My god that sounds awesome.
    Heh. You convinced me. That sounds funny.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:45 No.16262823
    I'd probably have made it a High Programmer who's stumbled across a stash of Old Reckoning Animes and has decided that life in Alpha Complex will be much better when everything is just like one of them. Maybe he's a Romantic who think they're a truthful representation of life back then, when things were happy. Before the Communists ruined everything.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:48 No.16262846
    The Hardest of it all
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:48 No.16262851
    I would play the hell out of this IF my Troubleshooter and his team starts in the original Alpha Complex.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:50 No.16262866

    Alternatively, Britain's Complex's Computer only had access to the Daily Mail website and back catalogue.

    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:52 No.16262882
         File1315781561.jpg-(8 KB, 120x120, eye-makeup.jpg)
    8 KB
    Sure. Why the hell not.
    As long as they're prepared to "make" their eyes when they arrive!
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:53 No.16262890
    Trouble-Shooters are armed with MUSLAMIC RAY GUNS.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)18:59 No.16262958

    The ever-imminent threat is from SHARIA COMPLEX where the word of their computer ALLAH is law.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:00 No.16262969
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:02 No.16262981
    Have Kawaii be mandatory. Unfortunately, Computer-Tan's anime collection was corrupted by the enemies. So as in canon, it has no idea what kawaii is.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:03 No.16262995

    You could run an entire mission around this. Bloke Computer needs foxes to orchestrate a hunt, ant the Troubleshooters need to find some!

    ...Of course, no one knows what a fox is, and that info is above their clearance, guv'nor.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:03 No.16262997
    One thing I haven't figured out is who the enemies should be?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:03 No.16262998
    How would Britputer act to someone missing afternoon tea?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:03 No.16262999
    Friend citizen, your belief that there are multiple Computers, and your knowledge of the far sectors of the Outdoors are treasonous. Please report to the nearest HAPPYTYME Intsec Traitor Termination Room for immediately . Thank you, have a nice day.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:04 No.16263006
    And the secretive FURRY PARTY.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:04 No.16263007
    Summary execution. No exceptions.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:05 No.16263016
    The citizens of Brit Complex all salute Di-1-NAA as their greatest example of heroism and leadership.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:06 No.16263030
    Presumably we should follow her example by dying young?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:07 No.16263049
    >computers making mostly intangible things mandatory
    Yeah, I should have seen this from a mile away.
    Tell me, how does funny/scary mesh in the world of Paranoia? Do they even mesh?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:08 No.16263060

    Without an acceptable excuse, like having to be HARD-WORKING, failing to partake in NATIONAL HERITAGE is punishable by BEING STRUNG-UP or LOCKED AWAY FOR A PROPER LIFE SENTENCE.

    HARD-WORKING British citizens are the key to our CULTURE. You know who are lazy? IMMIGRANTS.

    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:08 No.16263061
    You mean I? For Indigo?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:10 No.16263077
    What does Bloke Computer think of THE MUCH MALIGNED SOUTH AFRICA?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:11 No.16263087
    It meshes perfectly, but only if you treat is as a black comedy from which you are seperated. If you actually lived in Alpha Complex, it would be an unrelenting hellhole from which there is next to no chance of escape (those chances: 1. Rising to Ultraviolet leve, and even then you need to defend yourself from other Ultraviolets and the computer, 2. Escaping to a forgotten part of the Complex, facing mutants, IntSec/Armed Forces excursions or random reconstruction/demotion/reactor purges or 3. Escaping to 'Outside' which for someone who has never fended for themselves in any way outside of personal preservation in the form of politics, self defense or bootlicking is a huge challenge AND STILL faces the threat of random Armed Forces campaigns to liberate Tree 249184T68.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:13 No.16263104
    Citizen Anon-Y-MOU-5 is the most treasonous traitor ever. He has been reported as logged in to over 3 dozen gray subnets at the same time, involved in countless terrorist acts simultaneously, and has been reported as a member of the following secret societies:
    Computer Phreaks
    Corpore Metal
    Death Leopard
    Frankenstein Destroyers
    Free Enterprise
    Pro Tech
    Sierra Club

    Intsec will pay a 500 cr. bounty for any information about Anon-Y-MOU-5.
    This offer expires.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:13 No.16263109
    And everything causes cancer. Obviously, this is enforced.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:14 No.16263117

    Paranoia XP defined three styles of play: Zap, Classic and Straight. Zap is pretty much zany slapstick, with no horror in sight. Classic is a bit more serious, but still pretty slapstick.

    Straight is Dark. Like, the players have to serve warm beverages to hardened psychopathic prisoners in maximum security prison dark. Orchestrating Great Leap Forward-style starvation in order to save their own skins and maybe earn a promotion Dark.

    It's probably not "oogle-boogle a scary monster scary". It's more "Dear God how can these people do this scary".
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:15 No.16263127
    SOUTH AFRICA was once part of BRIT COMPLEX, but thanks to COMMUNISTS, IMMIGRANTS AND ASYLUM SEEKERS, and the corruption of HARD WORKING BRITS, it was destroyed and became a cesspool for MUSLIMS and GYPSIES. Only OUR BRAVE LADS and PRINCESS KAY-8-TEE can free SOUTH AFRICA from the evil forces of THEYOUTH.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:17 No.16263143
    I have read those adventures. Indeed I have read pretty much every Paranoia adventure printed.

    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:18 No.16263157
    That was actually a mission I had my troubleshooters do. They almost survived it by claiming that Anon-Y-MOU-5 was actually another name for the Illuminati secret society, but then they got terminated for treasonous knowledge of The Illuminati. Then they all got recruited to The Illuminati. Including one character who was already a member.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:19 No.16263161
    Yeah. Playing it straight is pretty scary. Food you have no idea what it's like. Drinks that have a habit of killing you. The chance that you could be grabbed for no reason and interrogated for information you know nothing about.
    Its what I like about Paranoia. It can be played from a lighthearted zanny action game to a grimdark survival/investigation game.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:19 No.16263166
    I meant Ka-Y-TEE-8.

    Missed a hyphen.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:21 No.16263174
    Just get the game book and run it. Its possible the easiest system to run. It was the first system I ran and its the best way to get into GMing since there are no advance rules. Its just states and story.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:24 No.16263186

    So run it online?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:24 No.16263187
    Alpha Complex
    Friend Computer

    Brit Complex
    Bloke Computer

    Moe Complex (alternatively, LolitaCom)

    Brother Computer
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:26 No.16263199

    Not sure where Fiesta Complex and Computadoro Bueno fit.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:26 No.16263202

    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:26 No.16263203
    Omega Compex
    Comrade Computer
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:26 No.16263205
    The Combine
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:27 No.16263208
    commie com
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:28 No.16263215
    The People's Soviet Communist Socialist Complex Union of Russian Republics

    Tovarich Computer

    I mean, there's a whole scenario pack about this, lads!
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:28 No.16263219
    In Brit-Complex, hormone suppressants aren't used. Instead, SEXUAL BEHAVIOUR is thoroughly scorned, while citizens watch live footage of CELEBRITY UPSKIRTS and pictures of FRUITY SCHOOLGIRLS.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:29 No.16263223
    obviously, abbreviating GLORIOUS SOVIET PEOPLE'S WORKERS SOCIALIST COMPLEX REPUBLIC is treason of the highest order.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:31 No.16263236
    Anon! If you're serious about running this, hit me up. Email is in the field.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:33 No.16263259
    Isn't the Soviet version called Alpha State? There's a mission splat that has your team infiltrating it.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:35 No.16263278
         File1315784116.jpg-(514 KB, 1072x1520, 01.jpg)
    514 KB
    >In Brit-Complex, hormone suppressants aren't used. Instead, SEXUAL BEHAVIOUR is thoroughly scorned, while citizens watch live footage of CELEBRITY UPSKIRTS and pictures of FRUITY SCHOOLGIRLS.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:36 No.16263290
         File1315784168.jpg-(408 KB, 1072x1520, 02.jpg)
    408 KB
    page 2

    >implying this comic isn't banned in your sector
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:37 No.16263308
         File1315784249.jpg-(422 KB, 1072x1520, 03.jpg)
    422 KB
    Page 3
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:40 No.16263335
         File1315784410.jpg-(470 KB, 1072x1520, 04.jpg)
    470 KB
    Page 4
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:41 No.16263344
         File1315784467.jpg-(435 KB, 1072x1520, 05.jpg)
    435 KB
    Last page. Hope IntSec isn't tracing this li
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:42 No.16263356
    >Anime Paranoia
    And here I was thinking you couldn't sink any lower.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:43 No.16263367
         File1315784597.jpg-(133 KB, 500x375, FAGGOT DETECTED.jpg)
    133 KB
    If you keep forcing that joke it, might be funny one day.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:44 No.16263375
    It was nice of them to fill out captcha and submit your post.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:44 No.16263382

    Make it Tabloid General, rather than just the Daily Fail.

    Rejoice in your daily dose of celebrity bikini pics and X-Factor contestants.

    Respect must be given to OUR BOYS (even though nobody knows exactly who they are, or what they do)

    Anyone dissenting is clearly an IMMIGRANT PAEDOPHILE BENEFIT-SCROUNGER.

    Chavs are one of the secret societies.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:45 No.16263386
         File1315784701.gif-(13 KB, 267x238, fc_blue.gif)
    13 KB


    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:46 No.16263400
    Wow... this seems like you're taking both paranoia and the idea of anime paranoia as SRS BSNS YOU DO NOT LIKE WHAT IS RIGHT
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:52 No.16263492
    Does anyone wonder if GlaDOS was, in fact, a prototype for Friend Computer?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:54 No.16263515
    That makes Friend Computer Engineer's Grandson, or some such thing.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:54 No.16263516
    >a second computer in Russia, where sadness is mandatory.
    It's Russia, they don't need a machine overlord for that.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:54 No.16263524
    OP is always a faggot, but this is a great idea!
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:54 No.16263529
    I would like to do some writefagging about Bloke Computer and Brit Complex, but I don't know enough about British (pop) culture to make the references work.

    Anyone else up to the challenge?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:56 No.16263543
    Friend AfriComputer would like to remind you that AIDS is compulsory.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:57 No.16263555
    Just read this:
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:57 No.16263568

    Liberals, as a secret society are mostly defined by the fact that they embrace everything that Bloke Computer dislikes. They hug IMMIGRANTS, embrace PAEDOS, want to give soft sentences to CRIMINALS, and hate OUR BOYS.

    Now if only they could work out what those were.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:58 No.16263572
    Maybe a malfunctioning prototype. Many of GlaDOS' actions are FCish, but FC is not malevolent. It honestly believes that it is doing the right thing even as it wipes out an entire subsector due to alleged commie influence.
    It was originally designed to be a civil servant AI.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)19:58 No.16263573
         File1315785510.jpg-(28 KB, 577x435, rape.jpg)
    28 KB
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:06 No.16263681
    >In Soviet Alpha Complex, Computer is friend to YOU
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:11 No.16263733
    They also hate PROPER PINTS (whatever they are) and want to destroy OUR WAY OF LIFE with the aid of BRUSSELS by targeting our MEASUREMENTS and our VEGETABLES. Therefore EVERY piece of vegetable matter distributed in Brit-Complex must adhere to IMPERIAL standards.

    What, no one knows what IMPERIAL is anymore? Doesn't matter. Bloke Computer has spoken.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:14 No.16263777
    Friend AntarctiComputer would like to remind you that being cold is compulsory. Your cooperation isn't just appreciated: it's mandatory.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:15 No.16263786
    Guidobot reminds you that wild gesticulations are mandatory.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:16 No.16263788
    >Your cooperation isn't just appreciated: it's mandatory.
    From now on, I'm having Friend Computer say that in every communication it has with the players. So fucking perfect.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:20 No.16263850

    I think LIBERAL is too wide a church for a Secret Society.

    You've got your ENVIRO-MENTALISTS who want everyone to travel in PUBLIC TRANSPORT and shut down INDUSTRY.

    You've got your EU-ROCRATS who want everything in Brit Complex to be METRIC and want to STRAIGHTEN OUR BANANAS.

    You've got your PC-NAZIS who want to stop HARD-WORKING BRITISH CITIZENS talking about IMMIGRANTS AND OTHER THREATS.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:30 No.16263965
    Wasn't there a commie complex adventure in regular Paranoia?

    I seem to recall that the equivalent of the Communist secret society were the NazCIA.

    Edo Complex should be run by ANIKI! who YOU BELIEVE IN BELIEVING IN YOU.

    So closer to 1984 than regular Paranoia in that there is a fictional Big Brother figure and not just the all-seeing eye. Computan runs off of the legitimacy of the probably fictional ANIKI, who there are videos and pictures of (but you never see his face).

    There should also be a probably fictional emmanuel goldstein type figure for a three minutes of hate type deal, though I don't know who or what it should be. Maybe a fictional sentai villain or something? Then the communist type faction could be the self-styled minions of him, the dark lord whatever?

    Also, trouble rangers are going to be interesting when they are all the red ranger...
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:33 No.16263996

    Instead of mutants, everyone are secretly trade unionists?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:35 No.16264014





    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:35 No.16264015

    Other enemies:

    TRADE UNIONS who HATE HARD WORK and want to SPONGE OFF THE STATE. Every single person in Brit Complex sponges off the state, but that's not the point.

    The MUSLIMS of SHARIAH COMPLEX, as discussed earlier.

    The PAEDOPHILES, who commit UNSPEAKABLE DEPRAVITY. Naturally, because said depravity is unspeakable, nobody has even the slightest idea what it might be.

    Can we get the gays in there somewhere? The Daily Heil is hardly fond of them, after all.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:45 No.16264112

    Not that I'm comparing the two, but replacing the paedos with THE GAYS would make it more something people would want to play (people calling themselves gay and not knowing what the hell it means) rather than the other one.

    > captcha: okazaki byupli

    What about Okazaki-kun, Captcha-chan?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:47 No.16264134

    Maybe we should mix the two into THE PERVERTS. Conflating paedophilia and homosexuality is pretty common tabloid bullshit, whenever they're not claiming moral high ground over a football commentator or whoever for saying "faggot".
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:50 No.16264165
    Bloke Computer is quite amusing. Page 3 of every written material has a scantily clad woman.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:52 No.16264184

    News reports about mass promotions (to fill slots left by dead troubleshooters) are always full of pictures of attractive young women jumping for joy or doing Spontaneous fist-pumps.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:57 No.16264226
    And schoolgirls for the exam results, too (which are always better than last year's).
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:59 No.16264250
    Hell, if we really want Tabloid Complex then they should be calling themselves the PAEDIATRICIANS.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)20:59 No.16264258
    Daily Mail Bloke Computer makes me want to fucking kill myself in terror.

    Well played.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:02 No.16264273
    Thoughts of suicide are UNBLOKEY, citizen. Remember to work hard at the X-FACTORY producing new REALITY TV SHOWS for MANDATORY VOTING NIGHT.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:02 No.16264278

    That's because EXAMS ARE GETTING EASIER which is a symptom of MORAL DECAY in society.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:03 No.16264289
    A quick search of the Daily Mail tells me that the homeless are being captured by gypsies and kept in horseboxes.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:03 No.16264291
    I hate the fact that this thread is such an accurate reflection on the state of British media.

    That being said, anyone who doesn't watch the footy is a TERRORIST IMMIGRANT LIBERAL.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:03 No.16264292

    >TRADE UNIONS who HATE HARD WORK and >want to SPONGE OFF THE STATE. Every >single person in Brit Complex sponges off the >state, but that's not the point.

    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:06 No.16264324
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:08 No.16264344
    Remember MATES, being FUCKING OUTRAGED is mandatory.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:08 No.16264352
    Clearly we need to rescue the homeless from these GYPSY SCUM and then dispose of the homeless for being FILTHY SCROUNGERS.

    At the same time, we must be proud of our FRUITY SCHOOLGIRLS.

    I can't decide if there should be an exam failure quota, which is increased every year to show exams aren't getting easier, that IMMIGRANT PAEDO JOBSEEKERS try to disrupt by making kids pass - or the reverse.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:09 No.16264359

    What would Chrch-1-ll think?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:09 No.16264364
    'Did you watch the game last night, citizen?' is a life-or-death question. Daily morning quizzes on the game.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:10 No.16264368
    That's on the BBC too.

    Which is known in Brit Complex by it's nickname AUNTIE. It is a subroutine of BLOKE COMPUTER. However, it is more susceptible to manipulation by the Ultraviolets of Brit Complex and is often shifted to deal with Troubleshooters to which it always tells them to KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON and always speaks in Received Pronounciation and has a slight LEFTIST BENT which sometimes conflicts with Bloke Computer's orders and otherwise exaggerates them.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:12 No.16264388
    The thing about Arsenal is, they always try to walk it in.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:12 No.16264396
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:13 No.16264406
    A major thorn in Bloke Computers side is the SCOTELSHIRE ALLIANCE, a mixed confederation of Scottish, Welsh and Irish beliefs which believes in a homeland free of Bloke Computer that is full of sheep, kilts, some variety of FUN PINT called Guiness and bagpipe/harp music.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:13 No.16264408
    What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on so early?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:14 No.16264418

    Your question is irrelevant, citizen

    Murrd-0-ok is far more important.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:14 No.16264423
    Obviously there would be Queen Computer. She tells you to keep calm and soldier through. She reminds you that a stiff upper lip is mandatory.

    On one hand you need to obviously hate everything and everyone. On the other hand you need to never show emotions. Fun.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:16 No.16264436
    All government research is on the extent to which something does or does not cause cancer.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:18 No.16264444

    Everything, including air, tea and people, both causes and cures cancer.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:19 No.16264449
    Sharp objects or offensive weaponry of anykind is banned except for Armed Forces or The Bill (Brit Complex's form of IntSec) on the pain of termination.. However, troubleshooters are issued these items, regardless of their service groups.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:20 No.16264466
    Water cannons on every street corner, none of them with attached water pumps.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:23 No.16264492
    OI, Troubleshooters, take this gun and shoot those GYPSIES.

    RIGHT, you'll now be arrested for GUNCRIME.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:24 No.16264501
    Norn Iron here, when are you fellas going to pick up your food shipments? We asked for building supplies and you came back with an FOI request of how many muslims we and an order to destroy every back issue of The Guardian. Except for the sports and society sections as 'they pose no threat of being read'
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:27 No.16264520
    They believe Bloke Computer to really be a citizen known as CROM-U-WELL-1 and so aside from the kilt idolise the CAVALIERS who they believe to be associated with some kind of sparkling beverage.

    Also, because of the constitution of Brit Complex, there are three parts of Bloke Computer, an elected group of subroutines known as COMMON who try to delete one another by accusing them of being IMMIGRANTS and BENEFIT FRAUDS, the LAWDS who's job is to ignore COMMON at all cost and MONARCHY a seperate AI who is completely aware of what's going on but is locked down by Bloke Computer and prevented from doing anything.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:32 No.16264555
         File1315791120.jpg-(41 KB, 496x600, op is a faggot but that's okay.jpg)
    41 KB
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:32 No.16264557
    you seem to HAPPY, COMRADE.

    Are you not SAD?are you not SAD that COMRADE LE-N-1-N died because of YOU?
    aren't you DEPRESSED that the WINTER killed BILLIONS OF BABIES?
    Aren't you sad that the CAPITALIST PIGS are still alive?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:48 No.16264692
    Moonlight causes cancer, as does starlight and sunlight. Also, darkness causes cancer.

    Also, this site is nice. kill-or-cure.heroku.com/
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)21:57 No.16264794
    They should be opposed by the RANGERS who SAY NO to all important questions.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:26 No.16265035
    Bumpin for bloke computer.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:31 No.16265091
    You people already live in a horrible dystopia don't you?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:35 No.16265136
    If you can, try and find The People's Glorious Revolutionary Adventure. It's a 2nd-edition Paranoia product but it's fucking amazing.

    >player characters are Commie troubleshooters
    >The leader of Alpha State is Tovarich Computer who talks like a psychotic Soviet Santa Claus
    >everyone is security class Red
    >the ROYGBIV classes still exist but you always say "Red" instead of the actual color in question
    >Cold Fun is Cold Borscht. Hot Fun does not exist
    >Sourcebook comes with cut-out templates for beards. Even one for Tovarich Computer
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:44 No.16265256
    You can find it by searching
    People's Glorious Revolutionary Adventure pdf
    on google.
    It's the third hit.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:51 No.16265323
    Why do you think the Paranoia IP was revived under Mongoose Games, a British company? It's because Paranoia is jolly good fun partly because it pokes fun of the society in which we live.

    Remember, we're the country that spawned 1984, Brave New World and Judge Dredd. If you want black dystopian humour, you go to Britain.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:51 No.16265334
    >sent my troubleshooters to THE FUCKING MOON
    >Cause its a big ass rock hanging over Alpha Complex. It might fall
    >Space Wizard.
    >No survivors.

    Finally someone actually understands how to GM paranoia
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:52 No.16265339

    Daily Mail = Fox News.

    Rabid, right-wing, and prone to make shit up.

    Non-representative of the vast majority of Brits.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:54 No.16265354

    Archivan for Bloke Computer?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)22:58 No.16265394
         File1315796292.jpg-(672 KB, 2420x1551, mail-tube-map-medium-large.jpg)
    672 KB

    Archivan for Bloke Computer?

    Pic related: It's a circuit diagram for Bloke Computer's CPU
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:06 No.16265498
    Russia friend computer is based off of the soviet union and the disctatorship there. It's also a parody of the USA in the 50s, where happiness was the culture of the day. That was then. At that point there was more entropy, time passed is entropy gone. As entropy becomes reality time moves forward. The soviet union was an anlpha male society. It valued strength, power, and respect. It used violence all the time. But the US did too, and was secret about it to create more Order.

    That means a society run by alpha maleish people who still love nerd stuff like you guys. Like Paranoia. Would need to have lots of sex, and have lots of kids. Or atleast one day have a few kids and develop technology. And if people listen to this idea more order will happen. And that needs to happen because entropy destroys. And order creates. Jocks kick sand castles, nerds build them.

    And we have no way of kowing, yet, if order is > entropy. If there should be anarchy, or democracy. If there should be more jocks that love Jesus than nerds that are athiests. And so free will is just the entrop buzzing along the time scale of reallity (science up in this) of electrons bouncing around atoms randomly to order.

    tl;dr new religion itt
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:08 No.16265519

    Samefag fail.

    But your Tube Map pic redeems you, so archived
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:10 No.16265550
    ...Are you on the drugs?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:15 No.16265613

    No, but it's tg releated. That means sci-fi space opera stuff you guys love WILL happen because more nerds will be born that are alpha-nerds (make technology, fuck bitches, make more alpha-nerds) AKA Future Jocks, will exist. And then evertually civilizations that are more beta. Space Good vs Space Evil (space soviet union, space barbarians, space caveman that didnt make fire but fucked all the women) will fight. If you believe it and strive for that it will happen.

    Free Will AND Pre-Destiny
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:18 No.16265654
    >No, but it's tg releated.
    Okay. Are you foreign or just stupid?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:33 No.16265837

    really high, yeah. but it was going to happen and you accwpintg it and my idea will happen. but you choose if tat happens you can see into the future enough. i cant
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:34 No.16265853
    >read the daily mail a few times being linked off of /k/
    >thought them to be super fucking leftest

    They are rightest? Thats a big surprise. What with their DOUBLEPLUSGOOD feelings on THOUGHTCRIME prevention that the TROUBLESHOOTERS have been doing. Like arresting ROWDYYOUTHS that posed on the internet with EVILRUSSIANHATS and BLUNTSTICKLIKEOBJECTS
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:38 No.16265902
    What's leftist in a America is right wing everywhere else.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:42 No.16265932
    This so much. I remember Politics A2 a few years back when we were learning about American politics.

    Essentially, the US left is about our center your center-left is about our right, your center right is our extremists and your right is beyond our crazies.

    Not saying we don't have our own problems, it's just the political spectrum is shifted heavily to the right when it comes to America.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:44 No.16265955
    Which in my opinion is a good thing. Right is where its at mate.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 09/11/11(Sun)23:45 No.16265963
    Sadly true. This country's political system is fucked.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:48 No.16265992
    >Future Jocks
    Will they steal my space lunch money?
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:54 No.16266064
    The worst part is, how the treat anyone with "rightest" ideas as some whack job fascist nutbag.

    Thank god I moved to the US. Been here for 6 years and loving it.
    >> Anonymous 09/11/11(Sun)23:58 No.16266104
    What's center in the US isn't particularly unreasonable. The problem in the US is that it's swinging to the right wing of it's own right skewed spectrum. That way lies madness war and death. (And public schools that are glorified Christian parochial schools)
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)00:05 No.16266165
    As Garret Hunter would say
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)00:05 No.16266166
    >That way lies madness war and death
    no its the defense against various groups seeking to end America that leads to war, which in turn leads to death. In fact death shouldn't have to be referenced when bringing up war, that in itself is redundant. The madness is merely implied
    >(And public schools that are glorified Christian parochial schools)
    I live in California where they just mandated teaching gay history, not gay rights but history in textbooks. I think I would rather have the latter.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)01:41 No.16267065
    People aren't getting how names work in PARANOIA.
    It goes Given Name (like Joe) dash Clearance (ROY G BIV, Ultraviolets are U, Infrareds haven't one) dash Sector (any three letters) dash clone number (only goes up to 6 except for Ultraviolets).
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)02:19 No.16267360
    While I don't think gay history should be a mandatory part of curriculum, the history of the gay rights movement within the United States probably should be part of pretty much every high school level American History course. The gay liberation movement (Black Cat Tavern, Stonewall et al were important parts of US history.)

    Similarly places where LGBT issues either strongly affected or were strongly affected by world history should be covered too. (Sexological research in Weimar Germany, along with it's tie into the Nazi book burnings, the use of their lists to bring criminal charges against German homosexuals, the confinement of homosexuals and other sexual deviants to concentration camps, and the fact that the same criminal statutes against homosexuality stayed on the books after the fall of the third reich)

    But I just happen to think those things are important to cover within the general history topics already taught. If you're going to offer a gay history course it should be a social studies elective in the same vein as comparative religion courses.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)02:21 No.16267379
    Meanwhile kids don't even know who Sitting Bull was.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)02:42 No.16267579
    United States crimes against the indigenous peoples are always brushed under the rug.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)04:29 No.16268426
    Bloke Computer is a wonderful thing. I must steal it.
    >People talking IRL politics in a Paranoia thread
    I don't even.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)05:35 No.16268974
         File1315820146.png-(29 KB, 832x156, Paranoia Quote.png)
    29 KB
    This thread and pic related comprise my sole knowledge of Paranoia.

    I like what I have learned.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)07:25 No.16269760
    Bumping for BLOKE COMPUTER.

    Another thing about Bloke Computer: while all of Brit Complex is united together under it's hatred of ALCOPOP SWILLING HOODIES and POLISH PLUMBERS, every now and again, control over a sector or two is acheived by an entity known only as THE GRANUIAD, a sub-routine of Bloke Computer which broke off after being tasked to examine what turned out to be the corrupted Guardian archives. When it is in control POLITICAL CORRECTNESS and ENVIRONMENT are the orders of the day. Of course, Bloke Computer refuses to accept the existence of Granuiad, so it never ends well for the sector in question.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)07:35 No.16269844
    This is basically Private Eye: the Thread.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)09:11 No.16270563
    A man can be recorded on thousands of cameras per day walking in any city. ASBOs exist, which are basically criminal records you can be given for doing anything people don't like. Oh, and there are these things that play a high pitched whine that only children can hear, used to drive undesirables away from shops.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)09:12 No.16270575
    Oh, I forgot about those things.
    >ASBOs exist, which are basically criminal records you can be given for doing anything people don't like
    Never look up Breach of the Peace law, for your own sanity.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)09:38 No.16270766
    Wait you use a human equivalent to dog whistles against children over there?
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)10:12 No.16270844

    You say that like it's a bad thing.

    The Acolytes of the Eye would make a great Secret Society for Paranoia: UK

    Oh, BTW? In Brit Complex, the terms "England", "Britain" and "UK" are used interchageably. Nobody cares about this, except traitors.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)10:12 No.16270853
         File1315836762.jpg-(5 KB, 300x57, image (1).jpg)
    5 KB
    Well, duh, it's the only think that keeps the fuckers out of the malls and fucking around thieving everything in sight. At least with the older shoplifters you can bust em good and proper without anyone telling you off over it.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)11:21 No.16271384
    We sure do. If we didn't the young might actually be able to... use the same shops as adults.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)11:22 No.16271391
    And mad, rabid Scotsmen.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)11:22 No.16271392
    Never heard 'em, and I'm roughly young enough to be able to notice them.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)15:19 No.16273332
    That sound exists in the US too. In my experience, kids play it on their cell phones to annoy everyone in their class without their teacher realizing. Although I once had a teacher young enough to hear it. She basically reacted the same as the students.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)16:10 No.16273907
    Ok. I totally just looked up that sound. Am I supposed to still hear it at 26? It's not that irritating but I can hear it. (I find the general background buzz I hear around most electronics more grating.)
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)17:09 No.16274682
    It's fine. It just means you have fairly sensitive hearing. I recommend some heavy metal rock concerts.
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)17:50 No.16275161
    Bump for Bloke Computer
    >> Anonymous 09/12/11(Mon)18:06 No.16275330
    Tropico is an island paradise with one hospital for every 20 civilians, and a movie theater that always shows world premiers.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]