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  • File : 1313675055.jpg-(124 KB, 721x600, bongwater_brigade.jpg)
    124 KB Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:44 No.15979555  
    If you've ever wondered how a war would be run by disorganized hippies, here it is.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:46 No.15979568
    Natalie Portman can deploy on my battle lines any day.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:47 No.15979574
    The Jedi aren't exactly disorganised. If anything they're too organised in the prequels to the point of being generic and uniform.
    It still sucked I loved the prequels as a kid but the Jedi battle pissed me right off even when i was 12 or 14 or whenever it came out
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 08/18/11(Thu)09:47 No.15979578
    Disorganized hippies wouldn't even be able to hold on to a planetary system or even a single planet. But yeah teh fight on Geonosis is very disorganized. You got clone troopers charging into Droids blaster fire and aircraft with no kind of formation at all flying around blasting each other.
    The only thing that IS organise is how the Jedi just sunddenly appear out of fucking nowhere at the same time.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:50 No.15979601
    "Oh, yeah. I guess holding the Wookie planet for one more day is kinda super important. Thanks for reminding us big-head dude."

    What pisses me off is how Lucas cuts any tension in his scenes with terrible slapstick and/or a complete lack of serious reaction from anyone in the scene.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:52 No.15979609
    I hate her face. There's something just wrong with it.

    And she has the body of a child.

    Do not want.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:54 No.15979627
    >Disorganized hippies wouldn't even be able to hold on to a planetary system or even a single planet.
    GM fiat. Works every time.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:55 No.15979641
    The only thing wrong with her face is that it's not currently on my dick. She is smoking hot.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)09:59 No.15979662
    That's because she is Jewish, like the rest of the SW cast, because George JEWcas was the director.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:01 No.15979680
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    I've NEVER understood people's attraction to her.

    I guess I'm just a Scarlett Johanson man.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:01 No.15979681
    The only problem with the battle of Geonosis is that the vast majority of the Jedi were taught in the shittiest possible lightsaber form ever while receiving barely any training in the Force, making them mooks at best, who rely on status to do anything vaguely important.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:07 No.15979713
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    I love Dooku's style of lightsaber fightan. My fave.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:11 No.15979737

    Also, I fucking hate how they refer to moves as 'forms.'
    An upward swing is not a fucking form, it's a fucking upward swing.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:12 No.15979744
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    Master race lightsaber form here. All others are small time.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:14 No.15979756
    Forms aren´t moves.

    Their styles.

    The word form is also used in certain martial arts, so it´s not that odd.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:15 No.15979760

    fuck me
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:16 No.15979767
    This guy is fucking insane!
    >> Cú Chulainn 08/18/11(Thu)10:18 No.15979776

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:18 No.15979777
    Scarlett johansson is not exceptionally attractive if we disregard tits.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:18 No.15979778
    Jedis are not just hippies, they're also high all the time.
    Remember when Mace Windu went to confront the Emperor with three of his most powerful Jedi Masters? They all watched in awe as the Emperor jumped next to them and cut them down in one swing.
    Fucking useless stoners.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:18 No.15979785

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:19 No.15979791
    That bitch is ugly. I don't know how anyone can be attracted to that.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:22 No.15979795
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    Meh, I'm kinda over Natalie Portman. She delivers competent acting in half her films, only a couple of which really stand out as anything special. She's pretty enough under specific makeup and lighting, but she's certainly not the sex goddess some the internet and media like to portray her as.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:22 No.15979797
    I never had a problem with it there hadn't been a major war for over 1000 years.

    Nobody on either side had any idea of how to fight one. it happens in real life too, the battle of Paris during WWI was decided by taxis for crying out loud.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:26 No.15979823
    That and she will not age gracefully. Seriously, look at those cheeks. Guaranteed she'll look like a grandmother by the time she hits 40.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:27 No.15979825
    What confuses me about Star Wars is that the only noticeable breakthrough in technology between the Old Republic and the Empire is tractor beams. For fuck's sake, the galaxy spends most of its time in war, where are the weapon innovations?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:28 No.15979831
    Star Wars isn't really science fiction. Its a fantasy story with science fiction trappings.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:31 No.15979851

    Its because every few hundred years, some jackass gets it in his mind that the galaxy would be better off if someone killed most of the jedi. He then goes out and does so. The galaxy instantly falls into complete and utter chaos and anarchy for a century or two while the Jedi rebuild their numbers as everyone else is playing Fallout IRL. Then a century or five down the road, they've reached about the same level of technology they were at before, when the same thing happens.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:31 No.15979855
    The planet destroyer isn't innovative enough?
    >> Rear Admiral Asshole 08/18/11(Thu)10:31 No.15979857
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    >If you've ever wondered how a war would be run by disorganized hippies, here it is.

    The Culture would like to have a word with you.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:33 No.15979862
    There's a few thousand year gap between the Republic which the Empire took over and the Old republic from KotOR. Civilization collapsed and anarchy with roaming warlords ruled for three thousand years. During that time, most people were busy trying to scavenge for food and trying to salvage useful materials from radioactive craters that used to be factories instead of developing Hyperdrive Mk37a.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:34 No.15979867

    Case in point: Prequel trilogy, many jedi, everything looks shiny and new.

    Original trilogy, three jedi, everything is used and beat to hell and back. Only new things in that time period were the two death stars.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:34 No.15979870
    >implying superweapons were new when the Empire started making the Death Star
    >implying Malak and the Exile weren't destroying planets before it was cool
    >he doesn't know about the Dark Reaper project!
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:34 No.15979871
    Lets not forget that they are extremely shitty because all they do is to sit on the sideline, complain, complain some more, and ignore reality.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:35 No.15979881
    Prequels: Galaxy spanning hyper-internet.
    Original Trillogy: Computers are mysterious forgotten technology and only understood by pre-empire built robots.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:37 No.15979891
    Not even that, really. Sure, the actual construction took a while, but the design was already done in the prequels.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:37 No.15979894

    The sheer number of superweapons developed during the reign of the Empire is kinda impressive though.

    Three death stars
    The Sun Crusher
    World Devastators
    Eclipse class Star Dreadnaughts
    The Darksaber
    A half dozen super viruses
    The Tarkin
    The Eye of Palpatine
    That orbital cloaking device that would starve a planet of sunlight
    Shit thats just the ones I can remember off the top of my head.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:39 No.15979905
    Yeah but fighting a war the proper way isn't the Jedi way. I don't think the Confederacy would hold back on Planetary Bombardment as I imagine the Jedi would.

    Even still, while the show is quite entertaining and has some good episodes the thinly veiled left wing message it pushes annoys me a bit.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:42 No.15979922
    Also, KotOR had swords that could not be cut by lightsabers. Where did that tech go? Why wasn't it adapted into armors, shields and lightsaber-proof blast doors? Or is it Not Canon?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:42 No.15979926
    It's expensive as fuck, last I checked. Or something like that.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:43 No.15979931
    Grevious's robot guards have staffs made of that stuff IIRC.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:43 No.15979932
    Which is why every security guard had one.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:43 No.15979933
    Jedis? The same dickheads that sit in their temple and kidnap children?
    The same dickheads who never do anything?
    The same dickheads who allow civilisation to decay because it would take effort to get up from meditation position?
    The same dickheads who refuse to tell the truth?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:43 No.15979934
    Lucas declared it noncanon because "nothing should be able to stop a lightsaber, with the exception of another lightsaber."
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:44 No.15979941

    Its expensive as fuck. Basically a required expense when there were millions to billions of Jedi around, not so much when there are like ten thousand.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:44 No.15979942
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    Good thing I don't disregard tits then. On the contrary.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:45 No.15979951
    Considering it was the Republic at the height of its powers and they were fighting a foe that pretty much had dark Jedi as frontline troops... you're damn right they'd spring the cash for weapons that wouldn't break and get their wielder killed on contact with the enemy.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:45 No.15979952

    Prove me wrong.

    Many Jedi = Glorious civilization.
    No Jedi = Shithole universe with some petty tyrant ruling over it.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:46 No.15979953
    Firstly, anything not jizzed out by Lucas himself is non-canon.
    Secondly, cortosis is exceedingly rare and brittle.
    Thirdly, anyone using a lightsaber has incentive to destroy knowledge of its existence and possible uses. The Jedi and Sith are always at or close to the top of any hierarchy and would therefore be well placed to ensure the loss of this knowledge, the destruction of any existing weapons, and the termination of any mining near where the stuff is found.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:46 No.15979954
    For a second I thought I was on /tv/
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:47 No.15979956
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:47 No.15979958
    So a fighter equipped with lightsabers is the ultimate kill machine?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:48 No.15979965
    And now Greedo can ply his trade.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:48 No.15979969
    It was adapted, It's called Cortosis.

    Used in Armor it wouldn't stop a Lightsaber, it would fucking de-activate it. The material itself is very expensive, I believe the Empire used it sparingly on same of the more advanced Dark Trooper models, it's why Lighstabers spark against Dark Troopers in Jedi Academy.

    The best way to use Cortosis is to lull a Jedi/Sith into killing you, have there Saber short out upon contact and kill them in the surprise.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:50 No.15979977
    Only pure cortosis does that. Cortosis-weave weapons merely block lightsabers, and cortosis-weave armor degrades quickly and isn't 100% effective.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:50 No.15979980
    A fighter surrounded with remote controlled Lightsabers can fly through a Star Destroyer.

    Remote controlled so you can actually get into the thing and then activate them.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:51 No.15979983
    Corotis ore (The material used in the swords you're referencing) is EXTREMELY hard to mine. You basically need to extract it by hand or its useless, and if you touch it with bare skin before its refined, you're gonna get an electric shock with enough juice to fry a goddamn HUTT. And those fuckers not only have energy resistant enzymes in their sweat, but they're about the size of a bull elephant. Plus you have to wear hazard gear 24/7 since its like abestos, if dust gets in your lungs, you get super space cancer. And that same dust jams up the tools you need to use to extract it in the first place.

    Then you have to make a sword using exactly the right technique or the lightsaber will just chop though it anyways.

    You can see why people might not bother making swords like that anymore when there were maybe a few thousand Jedi in the universe. Ohh some wealthy crime boss might be able to get one custom made, but Joe Deathsticks isn't.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:51 No.15979984
    I could point you at the Mandalorian wars in the Old Republic. But that is outside of normal canon.
    In Episode 4 you see a random farmer, going into the house of another farmer, they visit the shitties hellhole in a shitty spaceport, travels in a spaceship thats pro is "engineered like a pro" and not "its new damn it! Paid by the Republic!".
    The rest of it is when we are following a bunch of starved Rebel ragtags without a proper defence or founding, who will slowly succumb to lack of finance.
    But take a look at Cloud City, or the entire Death star interior. Their shiny, and stilish, and new.
    In Episode 1-3 they go around in "da latest byroucratic douchbaggs appartments" and use "gubment muney to found spacecrafts", and run away with a spacecraft that basically a gigantic pile of bribe money.
    Of course it looks shiner, Because we never get too see anything else.
    Prove me wrong.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:51 No.15979986
    I think you mean "Pretty much everything about Scarlett Johanson is perfect."
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:53 No.15979996
    the force doesn't work like that

    if all the jedi and all the sith suddenly blink out of existence. The next generation will still produce force-sensitive people.

    If you have force sensitive people, conflict is inevitable. Just like if you have money, or religion, or politics, or emotions.

    Getting rid of the Jedi/Sith doesn't solve anything, they'll just come back.
    If you want to really solve the problem, you have to eliminate the force altogether
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:53 No.15979997
    They used it all up for Darth Vader's armour.

    Also, some Jedi faggot managed to score a cortosis sword, and tried to assassinate Darth Vader.

    So Darth Vader force choked the bitch, stole her cortosis blade and butchered the Jedi backup.

    During the whole fight, his lightsaber was deactivated.

    It doesn't matter how much I hate Star Wars, Darth Vader will always remain the ultimate badass.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:55 No.15980007

    And then Lord Emperor Killfrenzy the Seventh rises up and enslaves your planet along with hundreds across the galaxy. Don't you wish you had some Jedi to throw down his empire now?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:56 No.15980016
    go to bed Kreia
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:56 No.15980017
    Which is also fucking hilarious, because he contradicted HIS OWN FUCKING MOVIES by doing so.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:57 No.15980029

    >Eliminate an energy field produced by all living things.

    Yeah unless you're a droid, good luck with that.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:59 No.15980039
    To be fair, mandalorian slaves rarely complain about being slaves. That whole lobotomy, surgical reconstruction for slave work and pain inducing obedience implants help.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)10:59 No.15980042
    Who cares, that's why they invented blasters.

    I pop the motherfucker right through his ass, because I've grown some balls because I don't need no Jedi fuckup to stand up for my rights.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:01 No.15980051

    And he laughs and then cuts you down with a vibroblade after his men rape your family.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:02 No.15980059
    You're going to shoot at the guy wielding a lightsaber. Who not only knows what you're going to do before you do it, but can choke you from halfway across the goddamn room.

    Or from over a kilometre away through a video screen.

    There is a reason why the way they brought down the Jedi in Order 66 was with overwhelming firepower. On some occasions, they simply didn't bother throwing men at them, and just carpet bombed everything for kilometres in every direction.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:04 No.15980068
    In fact, he demanded that one such sword be changed into a light-katana that glows black. When will he retire?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:04 No.15980069

    Since when did no Jedi mean no Sith? Fuck, even without the Sith, there are still plenty of evil groups of Force users out there who would be happy to descend on the galaxy as soon as the Jedi were out of the way.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:04 No.15980074
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    So if there are no Jedi and Sith, the universe will get taken over by Mandalorians and Decepticons.

    Why did Kreia cook up her plan again?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:05 No.15980076
    If it was THAT expensive, dangerous and unreliable, why bother equipping half of your army with them? Especially when your enemies are supernaturally better than you at sword-fighting. Seems to me that giving your troops better guns and a couple extra grenades would be cheaper AND more effective.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:06 No.15980090
    But no one can force choke anymore, because all the Jedi pussies are EXTINCT!
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:06 No.15980092
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    One of many things missing from Star Wars.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:07 No.15980096
    Phrik is better, but rarer.

    One container of the stuff survived Alderaan blowing up.

    Yeah. It got hit with a planet busting superlaser, and THEN the planet blew up beneath it. And it was perfectly fine.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:08 No.15980099
    Rule of Cool
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:08 No.15980101

    Because the enemy can pretty much ignore said blasters and grenades will just be tossed back at your own men.

    Who cares, it was an asspull on biowares part to explain why they didn't have a sundering mechanic for lightsabers.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:08 No.15980102
    >bring a vibroblade to a blaster battle
    >get shot in the face

    And that was the end of the quick but terrible reign of Lord Emperor Killfrenzy the Seventh.

    Because he was a retard who couldn't properly understand the principles of long-distance combat.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:08 No.15980106
    There is much more out there than Jedi. They're one of many organisations and societies. What sets them apart is that they're the ones who, thousands of years back, decided to become more actively involved in galactic affairs.

    And they're in the movies, obviously.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:09 No.15980110

    Yeah all the jedi, but theres a billion other dark side force using groups out there, that the jedi were convivently serving to keep the numbers down.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:09 No.15980112

    Shield technology. Someone wearing an energy shield and using cover can close the distance to a dude on a spaceship really quickly, and the only thing that can effectively get past shields without expending a lot of energy is vibroswords.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:10 No.15980114
    >Because the enemy can pretty much ignore said blasters
    You have to be pretty damn good to just ignore blasters. At least if Star Wars D20 (aka the rule system used in KotOR) is any indication.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:10 No.15980117
    >Killfrenzy uses his dark side power to suck your blaster shot into your palm, because hes a fucking boss like that.

    Then he laughs at you, and guts you while you have a look of shock on your face.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:10 No.15980118
    >and grenades will just be tossed back at your own men.

    Hahahahah. Not if they're SONIC GRENADES! BANG! BANG! FEUERFREI!

    Jedi can't into the Force when their ears are ringing. And that's fucking canon.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:11 No.15980124
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    Mandalorian armor is blasterproof. Enjoy your new pain inductor slave implant.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:12 No.15980125
    So they ripped off Dune?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:12 No.15980127
    Uh... yes, they will. The grenades will be tossed back at you, and then the sonic goes off in your face.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:12 No.15980130

    Ohh yeah, I forgot, thats the other half of the explanition for Cortois ore weapons. They invented energy shields, so it lead to a resurgance of meele weapons on the battlefield, and coupled with the high number of Jedi/Sith at the time, they needed something to protect against one jackass with a laser sword.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:14 No.15980135
    No he doesn't. Like I'm stupid enough to use a blaster on a Force user so close by.

    If he's close enough to Force bullshit on me, I'm not using a blaster, I'm using grenades and slug throwers.

    HK-47 has taught me well. He should teach everyone.

    When even the smallest child knows the weaknesses of Jedi or Sith or whatever the fuck I don't give a shit, then the universe will be at peace.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:14 No.15980136
    Mandalorian iron also has an inherent weak point to it. Tap it even lightly, and it shatters all over the place. One Force power can easily let you perceive said weak point.

    Repeated strikes/hits to a single spot will also cause it to break or otherwise shatter.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:16 No.15980144
    HK-47 only follows force users, so TROLOLOLOLOLO
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:16 No.15980145
    Agreement: Indeed, my good meatbag.

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:16 No.15980146
    HK-47 is smart. Prepare the battlefield, lay traps, endanger innocent lives (Jedi are suckers for that sort of thing). Above all, never engage with them on anything approaching a level field, or where they happen to be strong. Which essentially means:

    1. Stay out of melee range.
    2. Make it too risky for them to use the Force and turn you into a pinata.
    3. Stay out of melee range.
    4. Area effect tactics.
    5. Stay out of melee range.
    6. Don't be a moron and shoot a Jedi with a blaster.

    And it still won't always work.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:17 No.15980149
    Who cares. I'm wearing a helmet, the Jedi fuck is wearing a robe.

    I don't suffer from the sonic shockwave, but the Jedi is. Regardless of the location of the sonic grenade.

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:17 No.15980150
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    This thread reminds me why I hate the Star Wars EU even more than the prequels.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:18 No.15980157
    >HK-47 taught me

    No he fucking didn't. You're some goddamn colonist on a outer rim planet. HK-47 would sooner gut you then go about how awesome it is to kill jedi.

    >Close enough to use force powers

    Since most frag grenades have a 50 meter shrapnel radius, It's good to see you're willing to die for the cause. Meanwhile I give the Jedi a 50/50 chance to protect himself with some Telekinetic wall or something.

    >Slug thrower

    Hope you enjoy having only four to eight shots when some dude is charging at you. Plus Jedi (or at least Obi Wan) can deflect that shit with the force. See the Clone Wars Series. The awesome one. Not the new one.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:20 No.15980168
    Don't forget grenades, mines, gas weapons, chemical weapons, sonic weapons, poison weapons, flechettes, shotguns, machineguns, explosives, mercenaries, combat droids, sniper rifles.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:20 No.15980170
    Setting aside you continually moving the goalposts, what happens when he tosses the grenade as hard as he can away from him?

    Or when the Jedi is wearing armour himself?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:22 No.15980180
    >wearing armour

    Don't you mean Sith, you goalpost moving faggot?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:22 No.15980183
    > gas weapons
    They tried that in Episode 1
    Jedi have the lung capacity of expert freedivers.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:23 No.15980193

    >Jedi wearing a robe

    Jesus, I've told the council again and again, but NOOOOOO, they'd rather keep having guys gutted by some spice addict in a bar fight. Meanwhile I'll be over here with that suit of battle armor I pulled off a merc. It didn't take that much effort to fit propery, and It's a lot better then my bare flesh for that one blaster bolt I miss.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:23 No.15980194
    Obi-Wan wears it in the Clone Wars TV series.

    He's not the only one. They're not morons.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:24 No.15980197
    Jedi wear armor
    It's in the trailers for TOR
    It's in that vidya with starkiller, Force Unleashed.
    It's in the Clone Wars.

    Just saying it's documented canon for Jedi to wear various forms of battle armor.
    Anyway, carry on flaming each other, I just wanted to point this out.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:24 No.15980201
    They use the Force to cheat. It gives them something like quadruple the time or more than some of the best "normal" athletes have.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:29 No.15980222
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    So I think by this point we're more or less proven that Jedi killing for non force sensitives requires either extreme skill, something unlikely to be found in most people or extreme luck, see above.

    Or outnumbering them a few thousand to one and betraying them in the midst of a war.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:30 No.15980229
    That's why you use gas weapons that work on skin contact instead of inhalation, like mustard gas.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:31 No.15980238
    >fighting against Jedi
    >betting on one trick pony

    You poison them, you detonate sonic bombs on them, a squad of droids drop in, meanwhile a merc starts killing kids, a sniper keeps shooting at the Jedi from a distance and around the corner is a huge alien with a huge shotgun waiting.

    THAT'S how you kill a Jedi.

    By playing Command & Conquer.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:31 No.15980239

    Jedi confirmed for cleric/divine caster ;)
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:32 No.15980240
    Or mines.
    Or flamethrowers.
    Or cluster rockets.
    Or chemical weapons.

    To name a few.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:32 No.15980241
    for anyone that hasn't seen the trailers for The Old Republic, go watch them.

    They are better than the entire prequel series.
    I also love how the same characters in the three, the jedi with the green dual saber, the commando/soldier guy, and that one sith (who continues to look more and more badass in every trailer)

    It seems like they are releasing the trailers in reverse chronological order.
    Return was most recently released, but shows the Sith guy looking young and smooth.
    By the time you get to Betrayal, the Sith guy is like half-robot.
    Kinda cool to inject some form of story running through all the trailers imo. Better than just random, unrelated stuffs
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:33 No.15980251

    Or maybe I'll just go "ohh hey shit, the force is telling me I better not let that gas touch me, time to surround myself with a bubble of breathable air while I cut my way out of this room"

    Hell If its just a relatively mundane knockout gas, maybe I'll just ignore it and have the force neutralize it inside my body.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:34 No.15980256
    Autoshotguns and both frag and gas grenades.
    Enjoy your dead Jedi.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:36 No.15980262
    Don't forget arming heat triggered mini mines on your own body.

    That Jedi will have a suprise when he decapitates you.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:37 No.15980267
    >surround myself with a bubble of breathable air
    Now you're just making shit up.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:37 No.15980270
    >implying he'll be able to get through the solid wall of shrapnel and pellets in order to do so
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:37 No.15980272
    > Send mercs to find jedi
    > nuke site from orbit
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:38 No.15980274


    I'm fairly sure they upgraded to blaster versions of these. Which share the same problem with regular blasters, only they're fractionally more dangerous to the jedi.


    We discussed this already.

    Anyways I'm off to work, have fun plotting how to kill space monks. Maybe you can fap over the Tie Defender while you're at it. You realize it costs about as much as a frigate, right?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:39 No.15980277
    Where are these videos? Looking on the official site, I've only found Return and Hope
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:39 No.15980278
    Jedi cannot block solid projectiles, last I checked.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:39 No.15980284

    Breath Control. Look it up.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:39 No.15980287
    So you get lit up by your own mines because your clothing trapped body heat?

    Or, are we talking about putting on a suit of claymores activated by body heat?

    Or, are we talking about having the heat sensor trip the mine when a jedi opens your coat, quickly cooling the gauge?

    All three are completely fucking retarded. I like the claymore one, though.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:40 No.15980290
    Not that guy, but it's basically what the Exile does in "Poison Gas bar"

    To kill a Jedi, you lure him down a dark mine and then... SSSSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssssBANG
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:41 No.15980292
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    >Jedi are now dead.
    >several thousand years worth of anarchy because hundreds of thousands of alien planets who all think "hey, I can build a fleet an conquer nearby other planets and make my own empire" AT THE SAME TIME
    >sure do love 200 year old salisbury steak.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:42 No.15980297
    Heat triggered by light saber.

    I doubt someone has a body temperature as high as a light saber, you know.

    And one way to disable all mines?

    Nope. Each mine is autonomous.

    So to ensure that the Jedi be harmed, even just minor.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:44 No.15980317
    Jedi has precognition. Shoots you with gun.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:45 No.15980318
    Wat? I mean Jedi never were an effective force that prevented wars and rise of evil warlords.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:45 No.15980320
    Could just use a thermal detonator on a deadman's switch, honestly. He hacks your arm off, it goes off. He hacks your head off, it goes off. There is nothing he can do that will stop you from dropping the thing as you die and blowing him into atoms.

    Besides the mind trick, of course, but you knew that already.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:45 No.15980322
    Alright, you get a pass, though your mines are going to need to be very sensitive/not be at the risk of tripping over blaster fire.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:46 No.15980332
    Lightsabers and heat emission is a bit of an on-again off-again thing. Lucas isn't clear on the matter (lightsabers do melt things, but he's said that they don't emit anything which is why Qui-Gon was holding a lightsaber right next to the molten metal of the blast door in Ep 1), and the various authors can't agree on it either.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:47 No.15980333
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    To defeat the Jedi and the Sith, you need a Force Neutral Agent of superior ability.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:47 No.15980335
    Jedi precognition doesn't really work on mechanical things.

    Besides, the assassin doesn't even NEED to know that he's loaded with mines.

    The less the assassin knows, the less the Jedi will know.

    In fact, drugging an entire gang, loading them full of bombs, and sending them after Jedis.

    That sounds like a plan.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:47 No.15980337
    Yeah, they're usually the ones who have to go out and stomp all over them to make the prospective warlord play nice. Keeping the peace and all that.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:48 No.15980340
    here is Deceived, which I misquoted as betrayal earlier.
    It was released first, but falls as the last video on the chronological in-universe timeline.

    Here is Hope, released 2nd and the middle of the trilogy chronologically

    and finally, Return. The most recently released, this is the first in in-universe chronology

    where we see how the big bad sith in the other two betrayed his original master.

    The republic soldier/commando is in both Return and Hope. And is suitably badass in both.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:50 No.15980357
    Waves of mooks?

    Good idea, actually. Eventually, the Jedi is going to get tired. It'll take a lot longer than it would a normal person (motherfucking Force), but they'll get worn down.

    Hopefully their precognition doesn't warn them off taking swipes at the mines, though. The option of razing the area they're standing in from space is still the most effective, though.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:52 No.15980365
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    We're looking at this completely wrong.

    To kill the Jedi, we must defeat his sword.

    With a switch trick.
    He won't know the difference until it shatters on an arm.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:55 No.15980377
    >Wat? I mean Jedi never were an effective force that prevented wars and rise of evil warlords.
    This is literally the only thing the Jedi do. Prevent wars through diplomacy and stop evil warlords with laserswords. It is the ONLY thing they do beyond meditate. They were the equivalent of the galactic republic's diplomatic corps and Interpol.
    >> Nephanim 08/18/11(Thu)11:56 No.15980380
    >SW haters coming up with Batman Combat Tactics for killing jedi.
    >Jedi groupies asspulling new powers for every tactic JUST LIKE HOW SW WRITERS DO IT ALL DAY ERRY DAY.

    You will never find a more neckbeard thread of 'sperg and faggotry.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:59 No.15980394
    >some namefag
    Go away.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)11:59 No.15980398
    You never saw a political debate on /k/, did you?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:00 No.15980402
    Actually it works better on mechanical or non living things. Zero "natural" defence. That's why it's easier to force lift an 100 ton star fighter than a 200 pound human. Heck with jedi precognition don't even need targeting computers, just instinctively know when to press the fire button and the shot will go into an opening that even the best most state of the art computer can't project.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:01 No.15980406
    >Batman Combat Tactics

    What is this?
    Jedi-Repellent Bat-Spray?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:03 No.15980416
    It's how we're gonna kill the Jedi. Apply it to the batman.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:03 No.15980417
    The Sith and Jedi are subject to the Inverse Ninja Law.

    The more of them there are onscreen, the easier they are to kill. Thats why when there is only 1 ninja on the screen, he's an invulnerable badass.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:03 No.15980418
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    >Waves of mooks?
    How did I defeat the Jedi? Simple, I sent wave after wave of my own men knowing full well that eventually the Jedi would reach their kill limit and shut down.
    >> Nephanim 08/18/11(Thu)12:14 No.15980494
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    People get fired up about politics, because politics affect them and their future in very real ways. All you motherfuckers are slapfighting with your dicks over a badly written fictional setting.

    You want to see war run by disorganized hippies? Go watch Men Who Stare At Goats...

    Best Jedi Ever.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:15 No.15980497
    I still vote for high power sniper rifles and portable railguns.
    Especially if the railgun has a secondary barrel that tracks the target.
    Its not magic, no matter how good their precognition is they still have a maximum movespeed.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:16 No.15980501
    I'll do you one better, just use an electromagnetic pulse, short out the blade.

    Or, hell, make a railgun, find a Space Canadian, and have him pulverize the Jedi from 400 kilometers away.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:16 No.15980505
    If Jedi magic was like Hunter S. Thompson on drugs, the Jedi would be a whole lot cooler.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:17 No.15980511
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    Space Canadian?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:18 No.15980517
    Funny how Zapp Brannigan could be the best team leader for jedi killing job.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:18 No.15980518
    Roundabout way of saying to find a guy with really good aim.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:19 No.15980523
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    >Realism in a universe where sound travels through empty vacuum.
    >> Nephanim 08/18/11(Thu)12:22 No.15980536
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    Wrong image, but fuck it, it worked...
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:23 No.15980546
    I didn't know Canadians had a reputation as marksmen
    >> Nephanim 08/18/11(Thu)12:24 No.15980554
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    Aha! I'm not alone after all!
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:25 No.15980565
    Sith Lord Hunter S. Thompson vs. Jedi Lord The Dude?

    In a drugs duel!

    >give me that bong
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:29 No.15980589
    Not in general, but I think the world record for long-range kill with small arms is held by a Canadian, or was.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:33 No.15980610
    >And she has the body of a child.

    You know she's been in other movies than the Professional
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:36 No.15980628
    I can't tell who is more annoying; the fags who want to suck the Jedi's cocks as they beat everyone or the ones who think they're Ras ah Ghul formulating dark and edgy plans to kill them.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:39 No.15980651

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)12:47 No.15980697
    Hunter S Thompson wouldnt go for the dark side, he'd be a chaotic force user, true chaotic. Not like 40k chaotic.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:05 No.15980812
    I'll stick with Scarlett Johanson, since she's shaped like a woman.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:07 No.15980819
    At which point dis Ahsoka get that booby?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:08 No.15980826

    She was.

    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:10 No.15980841
    Yeah shaped like a woman, but her face loses to Natalie Portman. And face > body.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:11 No.15980848
    Expanded Universe shouldn't have to explain stuff that was in the movies. The movies should do that. Not everyone is going to read every story set in the SW universe
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:11 No.15980850

    Most likely between Episode 3 and Episode 4. But that would depend on Lucas' decision about her and Order 66.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:25 No.15980882
    >Stick with the prod.
    >A silent takedown is always the best take down.
    >Remember, we're police.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:27 No.15980914
    I think it's quite obvious she's going to die.

    It was a fucking rarity for Jedi Masters to survive, what makes you think a padawan would?

    I'm also going to say Rex is the one that kills her. We all know how damn loyal ARC Troopers are to the Republic.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)13:27 No.15980916
    I hope she dosen't get 66'd cause I'd like to ejaculate all over her face if you know what I mean.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:17 No.15981065
    Portman's face looks like a squished goose. Johanson has her beat in the face department by a mile.

    Great Face + Great body > Ugly Face + Child body
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:18 No.15981071
    Man, none of you fucks grasp how jedi precognition works.

    It's very rarely anything other than feelings.

    That's why everyone always has 'a bad feeling about this'
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:22 No.15981107
    >That's why everyone always has 'a bad feeling about this'
    I thought it was just bad, repetitive writing.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:33 No.15981180
    I hope you are joking.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:34 No.15981187
    Its like poetry?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:39 No.15981216
    >natalie portman is ugly

    what the fuck is wrong with you
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:41 No.15981226
    I have decent taste.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:42 No.15981229
    >Scarlett johansson is not exceptionally attractive if we disregard tits.
    Did you even see her in Iron Man 2?

    Dat hip:waist ratio.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)14:43 No.15981241
    She was worth the price of the ticket, my friend.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:26 No.15982534

    It's been described as anything from "Bad feeling about something" in the untrained or barely sensitive to "This is exactly what is going to happen in the next minute" at the highest levels, when you reach Jedi Master tier.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:28 No.15982559
    AKA: It's like Spidey Sense, it does whatever the writer needs
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:29 No.15982563

    Anybody who says her only good attribute is her chest has not seen the first two minutes of Lost in Translation.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:40 No.15982673
    Am I the only one that actually prefers a lot of the EU content to the original films?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:45 No.15982705
    Say what you will about Traviss' Republic Commando books, but at least they looked at OP's topic with a critical eye. Mostly the moral inconsistency the Jedi seems to follow and the overall incompetence they showed a lot of the time. A lot of it she chalks up to the Jedi simply forgetting that the clones didn't have slight precognition and the ability to deflect blasters.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:49 No.15982751
    There really needed to be a sort of neutral or balanced character that was neither jedi or sith just a person in the middle taking the best of both qualities and showng what could be done with them.

    Of course it would then ruin the jedi good sith bad kind of thing that needs to be shown to the auidence
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:55 No.15982809

    Depends on what the EU is, but Zahn's first trilogy is pure gold. Actually anything by Zahn, and that guy who did shatterpoint and the Ep3 Novelization.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)17:59 No.15982853
    I dunno, I find most of what I've seen to be better. There's been some real stinkers, but most of it doesn't come close to the ham handed tediousness of the original films.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:08 No.15982936
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    >Ohh hai

    Seriously, this entire "Trilogy".... Well lets just say the EU would have been better without it. Some silly floozy jedi shows up, her and luke instantly fall in love, but ohh noe she can't use her powers anymore, flirts with the dark side, and then runs off and is never heard from again. That said, the evil kid from the first book was pretty badass when he showed back up in the NJO series.
    >> anon 08/18/11(Thu)18:13 No.15982961
    people forget that the Jedi are not supposed to be "hippies" nor are they supposed to be "good" as most people understand it. The Jedi are a group that can be best described as Warrior Monks. Sure they learn how to cut a swath through the most badass special forces units around, but they are never really supposed to use that knowledge.

    All the Jedi are supposed to do is chill out, counsel inter galactic presidents, and act as third party intemediaries when things get high strung (which is why Kenobi and Jin go to Naboo to negotiate with the Trade Federation) and only bust out the light sabers when the shit hits the turbine.

    Every time the Jedi do what we would consider "Good" and go off to fight space Nazis or whatever they end up disrupting the balance of the force, fuck up their good karma, and become Sith. I mean hell even if Mace Windu killed Palpatine he probably would have fallen to the dark side himself at some point.

    anyway as far as the OP is concerned, I may have HATED the prequels, but i don't know if i would say the battle scene in the Colosseum was that disorganized, only because i always saw it as intentionally chaotic for the sake of spreading chaos in the enemies ranks making it harder to scramble a defense. or maybe i was just reading too much into a bad scene from a bad movie, idk brah
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 08/18/11(Thu)18:13 No.15982964
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    Callista Ming shows up in the new books. Except her soul was eaten by, well, it's hard to come up with something witty, but it's a big blob of thing that lives in stars and eats force-sensitive souls. Like a C'tan but...I've seen something like it before.

    The Blob-Thing uses Callista's soul to taunt Luke until he uses magic rituals to free her. Then she finally permadies.
    >> 40kfag from /m/ !!rthE8hgFXea 08/18/11(Thu)18:16 No.15982991

    fuck the NJO EU
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:16 No.15982992

    what. the. fuck.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:21 No.15983009
    Am I the only one who think the Jedi are assholes and that they got what was coming to them with order 66?

    They always go on about how precious life is, that one should respect others and that the Sith are squabbling backstabbers.

    But it's ok for them to employ childsoldiers, kill/maim people for any reason they like, trash/steal property and half the Jedi seem to turn on their comrades and go dark side while the other half is squabbling and talking behind eachothers backs.

    Fuck the Jedi, seriously. At least the Sith are honest about being douchebags.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:21 No.15983010
    I don't think hippies are supportive of cloning.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:27 No.15983043
    >grenades tossed back

    This is why grenades are never used irl. Also, people never use flamethrowers because their enemies might have fire extinguishers.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:28 No.15983055
    If Fate of the Jedi is doing anything right, it's killing off all of Luke's old flames.

    Oh, and making Mandalorians proper assholes again.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:31 No.15983086
    ITT: Karen Traviss fans.

    Also, if any fa/tg/uys are looking for a good group fiction site set in the Star Wars universe, I recommend "the Vast Empire". Site's at www.vastempire.com, stories are at comnet.imperialnetwork.com

    Imperials are the protagonists (stormtroopers and TIE fighter pilots), stories are set in the Thrawn era.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:34 No.15983113
    I wish they did the scale of the Clone Wars more realisticlly. I mean, weren't there only like 3 million clones in the Grand Army? That's pisswater compared to what is actually needed to carry out an actualy galactic war.

    I also wish that the clones themselves were explored upon more. More stuff like Republic Commando, things detailing the average life of a clone. His experiences, his relationships with his fellow brothers. But no, we wouldn't have many Jedi in that so yeah :C

    [spoiler] I have fapped to both Portman and Johansson. [/spoiler]
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:34 No.15983116
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    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:34 No.15983120

    >children soliders

    They found out about the clones literally five minutes before the war began. And at that point, they had no other choice but to use said troops in the war, which was the ENTIRE point of the Clone wars in the first place, that Palpatine would eventually be able to kill off all the Jedi because the war would erode public support for the order, and most of them would be off by their lonesome commanding a division or regiment of their killers.

    >kill/maim people

    Generally you can make a fairly good case of self defense, see the bar encounter with that weird dude in episode 4.

    >Steal/trash property

    I don't remember this ever happening, but then again, I am trying to repress most of the more retarded parts of the prequels.

    >Half of them go dark side

    Actually the entire set up of the Jedi order was made to minimize the chances of this. Plus at least when they aren't being genocided by some asshole, they're usually pretty good about trying to clean up the .01% that fall.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:37 No.15983139

    No Karen Traviss says that. The actual quote is something like "we have 200,000 units ready now, and over two million more on the way." Units could be anything from indivual clones to companies or regiments.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:37 No.15983142
    Well, at least in stuff like the EU, billions or trillions of people die when the galaxy gets invaded or some shit.

    Also, with the clones.

    If they have sex with each other. Is it gay? Or just some perverse form of masturbation?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:38 No.15983153
    Why the fuck does the Jedi order nearly always get almost entirely wiped out by Sith plots?

    You'd think they'd have learned the first few times it happened.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:39 No.15983158

    >Fate of the Jedi is doing anything right,
    >doing anything right,

    anything EU post Hand of Thrawn, sucks
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:39 No.15983161
    I don't know. If I have sex with a member of the same sex, is that sex with a member of the same sex? Or is it just masturbation?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:42 No.15983185
    They also use Cortosis weave to explain why light sabers don't cut through every fucking thing in Soul Calibur whateverthefuck it was that had Darth, Yoda and Starkiller
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:42 No.15983186
    Was thinking about padawans.
    If you read the EU books you should know that all taht happens frequently.

    There are some retarded number in SW though, Jacen/Sidious entire groundforces to invade one planet with billions of inhabitants is 100 000 troops and his fleet is less than a hundred ships.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:44 No.15983192
    But it's sex with yourself.

    They're called clones for a reason.

    It's like if you sucked your own clone's cock. It is your cock down to the tiniest detail, but on a different body.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:45 No.15983199
    >Every new generation of the skywalker bloodline has some kind of dark side convert.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:46 No.15983202
    Forgot to say, you'd think the Skywalkers would have gotten smart to this and sterilized themselves for the sake of the galaxy
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:50 No.15983240
    >But it's sex with yourself.

    No, its sex with your twin brother. Which is, you know, sex with a member of the same sex.

    >They're called clones for a reason.

    Yes, the reason being that they're genetically identical to each other.

    Different clonetroopers have different identifications (and hence, names), and different life experiences (and hence, personalities).
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:52 No.15983257
    >no fun allowed
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)18:54 No.15983277
    Not sure how I'm being nfa... if you want to have gay sex with your 10 year old brother, I'm not going to stop you.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:10 No.15983438
    you know what pisses me off more than anything in the prequels?

    the force user fights

    first off, why the fuck do lightsaber duels look more like performance art than a godamn battle?

    second, why the fuck dont they ever use the force in interesting ways? they do it all the time in the clone wars series, but not once in the movie, its obvious that yoda's saber should have been nothing more than a status symbol, and he should have been a pure force fighter, able to counter every god damn thing dooku and palpatine even tried, using the force he could block a saber strike, or even absorb it like that hadouken chick in the old republic trailer, he should have been assualting dooku in that hanger like an airbender from avatar

    yoda does NOT NEED A FUCKING SWORD, he should not be RESTRAINED by the physical, infact, he should be making the physical his bitch

    dooku should have been STRUGGLING to stay up against yoda, and it should have ended with yoda forcing dooku's saber from him (because yoda does not need to kill to win, unlike the less attuned jedi) before dooku flees, possibly making one last attack on obiwan and anakin to make sure yoda focuses on them instead.

    as for the fight with palpatine, he should have done the same damn thing, but HE should have been the one to struggle, because palpatine mastered both the physical and non physical uses of the force.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:14 No.15983478
    " that Palpatine would eventually be able to kill off all the Jedi because the war would erode public support for the order"

    thats a big reason i hate the prequels

    its obvious that the ot was ww2 in space, and its obvious that the pt was the civil war + 'nam in space

    except he fucked both of them up, and it became nothing but bullshit in space
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:44 No.15983716
    Becasue Lightsabers are what Jedi all about and face it before the prequels EVERY SINGLE nerd kind wanted to see Yoda fight with a Lightsaber. Lucas only gave the people what they wanted.

    Yes it is unlikely... strange... retarded... but at the end of every sentance there is always the "yeah but what if."

    My Dad despite being past 50 is a huge SW fan and when the first time he saw that scene of Yoda fighting Dooku he laughed so hard the movie was echoing. Afterwards he said it was the best scene in the whole movie, of course not because it was cool but because it was so unexpectedly dumb.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:51 No.15983771
         File1313711502.jpg-(8 KB, 200x150, fordo.jpg)
    8 KB
    At least the Prequels gave us the animated episodes focusing on the clones, counting the new and old animated series.

    Pic fucking related.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:53 No.15983792
    Yeah, this was great until they retconned it away and replaced it with THE Clone Wars, which, naturally, was the worst shit.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:57 No.15983847
    You can't expect anyone to out do Gendy.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:58 No.15983854
    Because (as we all know) the only thing the prequels had was VISUAL EFFECTS.

    The fight between named Jedi are all important parts of the movies and in the language of prequels this equals MORE SPECIAL EFFECTS! If Yoda and Dooku would just be holding their hands out and making funny faces while concentrating in their "inner conflict" with the force (which how it should be) there would be no need for visuals and as stated earlier no visuals = boring. If Dooku would pose no challenge to Yoda at all then the whole would have been both boring and short too. Also Yoda is bound by the dumb Jedi code of "never use the force to attack only knowledge and defence" to limit his options.

    As for Palpatine, we cannot have Yoda to struggle just to keep up with Palpatine because that would totally destroy his image of being the topdog Jedi Master. This is why the fight between the two was pertty much balanced with neither being able to get the clear upper hand. I think that is a good part of it even tough the parts when they Lightsaber fight is really dumb. TI agree with you the best part of it is at the very last seconds when they are both unleashing all their power at each other straight head on and basically it is about who is beter focussed, which one will get a moment of doubt about victory and loose focus.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)19:59 No.15983869
    It's actually not bad, if you give it a chance after the first season.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:01 No.15983888
    Every seen that episode when they OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE they meet force gods and shit?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:02 No.15983907
    Leia's hairbuns are the ultimate weapon in Star Wars. They are the source of the Force, and have the destructive power of a trillion Death Stars. All Carrie Fisher has to do is let her hair down...
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:02 No.15983910
    I mainly pay attention to the clone eps. I couldn't give two shits about any of the jedi/sith crap, haha.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:06 No.15983952
    The Star Wars universe would be ten times better without fucking jedi/sith force wielding mary sue cunts. Just give me galaxy wide wars with trillions dead and faceless armies cutting each other to bits with lasers please.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:07 No.15983961
    >>At least the Prequels gave us the animated episodes focusing on the clones

    Oh you mean:
    every single episode about one (or maybe a small group) character being fucking badass and owning the shit out of the dumb cartoon character enemy?

    In Samurai Jack it was cool because we only had Jack here we had a different guy every episode, be it Obi-Wan, Windu, Grievous, Anakin, Yoda, random clonetrooper commando, Ventress etc. whoever you wish.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:14 No.15984037

    No, you retards, he declared it non-canon because a normal looking sword stopping a shiny laser sword LOOKS RETARDED.

    I mean, magic force-field electrostaffs, fine. Shields, fine.

    Sword with ore stuff stopping shiny lazor sword? Retarded.

    I agree with him.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:21 No.15984098
    The image of the Lightsaber was already degraded considerably in that seen when we see lightsabers handled by FUCKING BLINDFOLDED CHILDREN! You give a fucking deadly weapon that can cut through almost anything to children?

    Really I though building your own Lightsaber was an important part of becoming a Jedi, it makes kind of sense to me.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:24 No.15984119
    >Just give me galaxy wide wars with trillions dead and faceless armies cutting each other to bits with lasers please.

    you mean 40k?
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:25 No.15984140
    he said
    >>without fucking jedi/sith force mary sue cunts.
    in 40k literally everyone is a mary-sue cunt, it's the univerese of mary-sues.
    >> Marquis de fenetre 08/18/11(Thu)20:29 No.15984164
    >Every character was a mary-sue

    You don't know what that word means.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:47 No.15984391

    Yeah, it's much better to give it to nineteen year old farmboys who have never even seen one in their life instead of children who probably have at least had some sword training beforehand.

    Not counting that those were training sabers, which just give you a nasty burn at worst, and only if you turn it up to like the highest setting.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)20:59 No.15984497
    Back in my days Lightsabers were just simple slight modified ordinary everyday gadgets. Beamcutters which average unerpaid factory workers used every day at their work. Instead of being the end-of-all-fightan-magic weapons that can block blaster fire and Force lightning and cut throught heavy duty armored doors like hot butter.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)21:01 No.15984516
    Eh sort of. Even 40k has too many 'speshul guize that can kill liek 100 guize all on their own!!!!111'.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)21:38 No.15984858
    Electrostaffs are kind of awesome.
    >> Anonymous 08/18/11(Thu)23:34 No.15985985
    Well, it's about the commandos, the elite ones.
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)03:53 No.15988319

    That's the in-universe explanation. Just like the in-universe explanation for vibroswords in the KOTOR games is that they have cortosis weave so they can block lightsabers.

    Just because it's *explained* doesn't mean it doesn't look retarded. And in a movie with nothing going for it other than a couple hundred dollars worth of CG effects, I'm not looking for justified lameness, I'm looking for explosions and shit.
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)04:28 No.15988623

    Couple hundred *million* dollars

    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)05:10 No.15988868
    Fuck, I'm laughing so hard at this thread right now.
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)05:13 No.15988875
    Now I want to see the jedifags and the marinefags argue with each other about which is better.
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)05:19 No.15988901
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)11:03 No.15990530
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)11:04 No.15990537
    Too bad they never faced each other, so we'll never know.
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)11:08 No.15990561
    >> Anonymous 08/19/11(Fri)11:14 No.15990599
    That's not half as stupid as the "darksaber" (after finishing the design, the vibrosword was refluffed as some kind of dark-bladed, asymmetrical lightsaber because Lucas thought having a non-lightsaber block a lightsaber would ruin Star Wars forever).

    Anyway, if you have the technology to make a lightsaber, it should only be about a thousand times easier to make a full-sized physical sword that generates some kind of a field that can stop a lightsaber, than to make a sword handle that projects such a field to a distance of one meter.

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