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  • File : 1305348999.jpg-(471 KB, 1200x1400, Siege Knight.jpg)
    471 KB Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)00:56 No.14919653  
    The Siege Knights. These towering hulks train themselves to become frightening siege weapons, and are well-respected throughout the lands. They're knightly order requires immense dedication and physical training; beneath their layer of fat they have an immense wall of muscle and can move frightening loads and enormous weapons with ease.

    They came from /tg/ some time ago, and have periodically cropped up here and there since. You can read the fanfiction that spawned them here:

    I made a Prestige Class based on them.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)00:58 No.14919680

    Siege Knight

    Requirements: Tumble 5 ranks, Toughness, Base Fort +5
    Special: You must train for at least one month in the Siege Knight's castle. This experience will train and manipulate your body in ways required for this class.

    HD 12
    High save: Fort
    Base Attack Bonus: Full

    Class Skills (2+Int modifer per level): Balance, Concentration, Craft, Diplomacy, Tumble, Knowledge: Architecture and engineering, Knowledge: Nobility and royalty

    Weapon and Armor Proficiency: A Siege Knight gains proficiency with all simple and martial weapons, all armor and all shields including Tower shields. In addition, a Siege Knight gains proficiency in the exotic Tower Armor.

    A siege knight must eat approximately two to three times the food of a regular adventurer. A siege knight who cannot do this for a full day becomes Fatigued until they can once again each their fill.

    Ex-Siege Knights: A siege knight who loses her extra mass also loses all benefits of this class, however merely ceasing to gain levels will not cause this.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:00 No.14919694
    Level Progression
    Adipose Layer - A siege knights massive form grants her a natural AC bonus equal to her half her Constitution modifier, rounded down, to a maximum bonus equal to her Siege Knight level, rounded down.

    Immense size - A siege knight's weight doubles as you join this class, brought on by the intense training required. If this would bring her weight high enough to qualify for the next size category (60 lbs for small characters, 500 lbs for Medium,) she gains the benefit of Powerful Build. She may only obtain this benefit once, even if she manages to increase multiple size categories.

    Enduring Technique - The following skills use Constitution to determine skill bonuses if it is higher than Dexterity or Charisma: Tumble, Balance, Intimidate. A siege knight may also use your Constitution to determine carrying capacity, instead of Strength.

    Siege Tumble - Treat all falls as 10 feet shorter for determining damage to your character. A siege knight can be flung as an object for determining damage, assuming one can find a creature or device that can lift her. If she hits something, you deal an additional 1d6 damage.

    Powerful Build - A siege knight with this ability is treated as a size category larger where it would be advantageous. If they already have Powerful Build, or receive the benefit from a class feature afterward, they add an additional +2 to all checks that benefit from size.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:01 No.14919703
    Siege Tumble - Treat all falls as 20 feet shorter for determining damage to your character. In addition, she deals an extra 1d6 Falling damage to an enemy or structure she hits for a total of 2d6.

    Tower Armor Familiarity - At fifth level, a Siege Knight gains an intimate understanding of Tower Armor. You may run at twice your speed (Instead of four times, without) in Tower Armor, and are impeded only as much as Full Plate.

    Immense Size II - Character's weight rises to triple your original weight.

    Siege Tumble - Treat all falls as 40 feet shorter for determining damage to your character. In addition, she deals an extra 1d6 Falling damage to an enemy or structure she hits for a total of 3d6.

    Weight-Bearing Blow - Once per day, a Siege Knight may put all your weight behind an attack. It deals additional damage equal to the Knight's bonus falling damage, to a maximum of 5d6 at level 10. This damage is multiplied in the case of a critical.

    Siege Tumble - You treat all falls as 80 feet shorter for determining damage to your character. In addition, she deal an extra 1d6 Falling damage to an enemy or structure she hits for a total of 4d6.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:01 No.14919713
    Disease Immunity - At ninth level, a Siege Knight's powerful body has enough mass and fortitude to endure any illness. She no longer suffers from any disease.

    Immense Size III - Character's weight increases to four times your original weight.

    Perfect Siege Tumble - At tenth level, a Siege Knight is immune to falling damage. In addition, they deal an extra 1d6 Falling damage to an enemy or structure they hit for a total of 5d6.

    Legendary Constitution - A Siege Knight's training has made them tough enough to succeed where others would fail. The character's Constitution increases by 2, with all the benefits that entails.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:02 No.14919716
    >siege knight thread

    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:02 No.14919725
    As much as I love fat chicks...you fail because you only gave the class int+2 skills. It's retarded.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:03 No.14919734
    Tower armor: AC 10, max dex bonus 0. Tower Armor weighs 250 pounds and is often prohibitively expensive at a usual price of 10000 gold.
    This exotic armor is used mainly by the Siege Knights. It is exceptionally heavy and thick, and requires special training to use. Tower armor is designed to resemble a miniature castle, including two model towers on each shoulder. It leaves the mouth exposed, but includes a helmet. Common building materials include steel, iron, adamantium or stone; the latter of which can be worn by druids. So thick is this armor that constructing a suit of Mithril bears no noticeable benefit to the wearer. Because of it's sheer size, you cannot run in Tower Armor and you move at half the speed you would without it.

    Tower Armor have traps installed in either tower to prevent flaking. It can have a removable miniature watchtower attached, which can house a creature of Small size or lower to provide cover. Cover provided is 3/4 when attacking, but if necessary the rider and duck down for total cover.

    I worry that this may be a tad overpowered.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:04 No.14919752
    Would Int+4 be better?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:05 No.14919765
    Anything would be better, frankly. I'd get them 4+int and bonus ranks to a strength/con based skill of their choice.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:06 No.14919773
    >Hey this seems like an interesting id-
    >Oh, it's a poorly disguised fetish class...
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:07 No.14919784
    constructive criticism is always better than insults, friend.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:09 No.14919822

    So what this is is pretty much a moving wall with spikes on it

    They can barely move, but it would be extremely hard to hit them
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:11 No.14919847
    How about not depicting them as BBWs and hambeasts?
    They can simply be behemoths of muscle and armor, the ultimate man-tank!
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:13 No.14919877
    what's the point in that?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:17 No.14919938
    It's basically a vaguely-humanoid castle
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:23 No.14920003
    I changed the amount of skill points it in my notes. I also added Intimidate to the class skill list, as I noticed they didn't have it.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:24 No.14920022
    more like

    vaguely ham-anoid

    cuz they're fat
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:26 No.14920044
    They're pretty much sumo wrestlers encased in iron and defence towers.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:27 No.14920063
    We need a dinosaur class. Delusional idiot wearing a dinosaur costume made out of cardboard, car tires and other shit. The Dinosaur can eventually transform into a true dinosaur with enough experience. A breath attack is possible.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:27 No.14920066
    I'm trying to keep it true to the stories, where they were basically sumo-knights.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:29 No.14920083
    And it has some weird class requirement that let commoners qualify at level 1.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:41 No.14920214

    how do dinosaurs get a breath weapon
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:42 No.14920227
    Because the person who transforms doesn't know anything about Dinosaurs
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:44 No.14920247
    Godzilla dinosaurs?

    I think they should go up in size categories instead of getting powerful build.

    And have a breath weapon
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:44 No.14920249
    does they have them confused with dragons
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)01:45 No.14920255
    Not exactly, they think the two are literally the same thing.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:47 No.14920273
    like young earth creationists?
    >> Zach !!m1zNwNhpIw+ 05/14/11(Sat)01:49 No.14920288

    Nah, dinosaurs are just cooler than dragons. Just replace dragons with dinosaurs. Nothing scarier than a fire-breathing tyrannosaur. Then again, maybe if the dinosaur class was an actual player class, rather than a prestige class...
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)01:57 No.14920366
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:09 No.14920481
    Tyrannosaurs-Rex wasn't really a dinosaur though. It was more akin to a chicken.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:18 No.14920571
    you're a chicken.

    i wish i had a siege knight girlfriendu.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:21 No.14920594
    Goddamn it, I knew this was going to turn into fetish fuel!
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:24 No.14920628

    No that's just AGGRO
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:24 No.14920634
    Aren't they bonded and marriaged to their Order and Goddess?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:25 No.14920636
    Enjoy seeing her for the 3 hours a week when she's not busy with siege knight stuff
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:26 No.14920649
    Siege knights need a support crew.

    Follow the warband, doin' support stuff.

    Because I support my woman like a well made undergarment.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:30 No.14920677
    I don't think they're entirely exempted from relationships, but most are probably too busy for them. The way of the siege knights is all-consuming and requires every-day training.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:31 No.14920681
    Does that mean they'll get all sweaty?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:31 No.14920683
    Don't the younger knights to handle that? You could be one of the archers who are stationed in the towers on their armour, but that's normal reserved for halflings.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:33 No.14920697
    They keep themselves clean with a bath at the end of the day.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:33 No.14920698
    Okay, so this literally is a fairly okay idea completely ruined as it purely there for fetish bullshit. Stay classy, /tg/.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:33 No.14920699
    Siege knights are essentially a very specialized force. I don't think they do everything on their own. They've got to have a militia of guys who handle the non-get-launched-by-a-catapult stuff.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:35 No.14920718
    It's a mediocre melee prestige class, at its absolute best. It's not really overpowered.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:36 No.14920725
    I mean the armor itself.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:36 No.14920726
    But would the Grand Citadels tolerate that sort of fooling around?
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:37 No.14920732
    They'll just have to, or I'll cross my arms and huff indignantly at them until they relent.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:38 No.14920738
    I suppose it's always nice to know which tripfag has which fetish, for future mocking purposes.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:39 No.14920752


    What if...

    What if I cross the Siege Knights with a Bloat Mage?
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:39 No.14920754
    What, you didn't know already?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:41 No.14920771
    Fetishists would get off on it even more.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:42 No.14920778
    The world would go mad.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:44 No.14920798
    They're at least twice as tall as a normal man, sometimes even three. I doubt that they would care much.

    A magic fat knight? Maybe something like that Magus class, only bigger. A party made up of Siege Knights and Bloat Mages might be fun or at least jolly.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:46 No.14920814
    I promise you, I can be very irritating.

    After all, I am a tripfag.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:52 No.14920860
    Then they would crush you like bug.

    Through there could be an interesting story in all this...
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:53 No.14920874
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    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)02:55 No.14920890
    I doubt they would. They are paladins. Just because someone is Chaotic Annoying does not give them a License to Smite.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)02:59 No.14920928
    Then they'd just throw you out

    And they're pretty strong so they could throw you a long way
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:02 No.14920951
    Yeah, but still, I don't think they'd throw out a guy who wants to help. I mean, someones got to cook all that porridge.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:03 No.14920956
    >Because I support my woman like a well made undergarment.

    I think it would take more than just one to support a Siege Knight

    So is it like in that one Cain book, where the older sisters are able to have a relationship?

    Because Siege Knights tend to get bigger as they get older.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:14 No.14921041
    Fine by me dude. I'm down with GTS.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:16 No.14921068
    But she's a big woman, how would you impress her?
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:19 No.14921100
    Piety and stoutness of heart.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:23 No.14921127
    They already got Piety and stoutness by the ton
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:24 No.14921133
    So surely they see the value of a pious and stout of heart husbando so they can have pious stout babies that are DOUBLEPIOUS and DOUBLESTOUT
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:27 No.14921150
    Also, I will use the power of Lucha Libre.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:30 No.14921167
    Surely that would be forbidden. Siege Knights live for war, so taking 9 months off to have a child would be looked down on.

    Plus it would take a really super heroic act to get a Grand Citadel's attenion, let alone woo her. /co/ might know how
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:35 No.14921208
    Ah, but I am a /co/mrade.

    Also, have you ever experienced siege warfare? Shit takes foooor-eeeev-eeer.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:42 No.14921258
    >Shit takes foooor-eeeev-eeer.

    Not when the Siege Knights do it. They were trained solely for wreaking up castles shit as quickly as possible.

    Interesting to note, Siege Knights regularly check their homebase for elves in the belief that they're all shubby chasers.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:44 No.14921273
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    She can still serve the knights for 9 months. She can train the constant inflow of youngin's, or work in the smithy. You just keep tryin' to crush my dreams. Why can't you just let me be happy ;-;
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:47 No.14921297
    Because I'm wish to futher develop your dream and work out any plotholes.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:49 No.14921305
    Why do you take so much interest in my crazy dream? Are you some kind of dream-eating elf?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:50 No.14921322
         File1305359448.jpg-(36 KB, 480x244, 3419 - alien blood crossover F(...).jpg)
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    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)03:56 No.14921365
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)03:59 No.14921396
    No I'm stealing your idea for possible future story plots.

    Also another fanfact about elvens is that the High Royal Citadel is banned from entering the elven forest. Last time she did, a fever of lovestuckness overcame the male population and she spent most of her time listening to elven poety by the gentlemenly elves and the rest of the time pulling off the less-gentlemenly elves off her body.

    This is due to elves being attracted to anyone with any sort of fat.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:04 No.14921437
    Man, if you're putting me in the story, you gotta be giving me a kettle hat. Those things are the most badass medieval helmets of all time.

    Can I throw it like a murder discus of badguy-cut-itation?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:09 No.14921475
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:09 No.14921482
    Maybe, but you'll be using it as a cooking pot most of the time
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:10 No.14921486
    Fuck yes.

    Do I get a cool name?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:14 No.14921510
    Only if you're good
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:14 No.14921518
    I'll be LAWFUL GOOD.


    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:24 No.14921606
    Okay, but don't complain if one of them sits on you by mistake.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:27 No.14921637
    Will I die from that?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:30 No.14921673
    Well the lightest Siege Knight tends to be about 500 pounds without armour, so you're likely to have a few bones broken
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:33 No.14921691
    I'm cool with it as long as he doesn't die and doesn't like, get turned evil by some wizard.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:37 No.14921725
    How would being sat on turn someone evil?
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:42 No.14921763
    Go to a wizard to get healed and the wizard uses me as a pawn because wizards are dicks.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)04:53 No.14921833
    Well then I guess you're lucky enough to know that Siege Knight tend to heal whoever they happen to sit on
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)04:54 No.14921846

    Seriously man. Wizards can't be trusted with the simplest of tasks.

    "Hey, can you clean this room for me?"

    Three minutes later? Wizard's shouting from atop a tower as an army of animated brooms pour out of it destroying everything in their path.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)05:01 No.14921895
    They were ordered by the rulers of Highdove to heal any and all they accidently sat on after crushing and then eatting the General's prized warhorse.

    They claimed it would of been a waste not too.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)05:06 No.14921929
    Did they even eat the bones?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)05:11 No.14921964
    Be a waste not to
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)05:11 No.14921965
    Made them into Jell-o
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)05:13 No.14921971
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    Wellp, it's about time for me to sleep.

    Goodnight guys. May I be visited in my dreams by servants of JUSTICE.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)05:30 No.14922080
    Perhaps I'll try this again later and hope for some real critiques..
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)06:15 No.14922376
    Well I do have one point to make, Weight-Bearing Blow seems a bit dull. An earthquake attack or a steamroller bullroll would be more interesting.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)06:50 No.14922565
    What about:
    "If used as part of a charge attack, you may knock the target back 5 feet per bonus falling damage die"

    Then it becomes a 'smack you across the room' thing
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)07:34 No.14922725
    >> Unit 248 05/14/11(Sat)07:35 No.14922733
    part of me wants to do a 4e paragon path.

    martial and or divine weapon-based?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)07:37 No.14922742
    What do you expect when you base a whole character class around your blubber fetish?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)07:39 No.14922752
    That could work, maybe you could get a feat that lets you turn it into a shockwave stomp that causes anyone touching you to be knocked back

    Son of a bitch I was just thinking about doing the same thing. I'm thinking for either a Paladin or a Cleric
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)09:24 No.14923272
    Here I had a go

    Siege Knight

    Prerequisites: Cleric or Paladin. Female.

    (11th ) Bloated Form: The Charater permently gains +2 Con and -2 Dex and reduces the amount of squares she can be pushed by one
    (11th) Safety Cushion: The character no longer takes damage from falling. This can be used when being fired out of a catapult or anything that could throw the character a great distance. If the Character hits a wall, she breaks through it, unless the DM says it's too hard.
    (16th) Body of a Castle: The Character's size increases by one, gaining al the advantages and disadvantages of this, but would only ever having a 5ft range.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)09:25 No.14923275
    Battering Ram
    Siege Knights are living Battering Rams. Not even walls are able to stop them.

    11th Encounter Power
    Weapon Divine

    Charge full movement cause 2[W]+Str damage. If you hit a target, you push the target back until the end of your movement. If you run into another target while pushing back the first target back, the second target is also pushed back and takes 2[W]+Str damage.

    Special: This Power can be used from being fired out of a catapult or anything that could throw the character a great distance. If so the power is actives when the character first hits a target or a wall, which she then breaks through.

    Castle of Flesh
    You are a living Castle, a fortress of flesh and steel. Able to laugh off any attack while safeguarding your friends.

    Utility 12th
    You gain resist 10 against all damage for a number of round equal to your con bonus and any allies within 5 squares of you gain +2 to their AC. During this time, you may not be move by any sort of power or attack, unless you wish to.

    Divine Stomp.
    With a mighty stop, you send your foes flying. With the magic of of Civis, you remove rubble and repair the ground beneath you, making it easier to get your targets.

    Daily 20th
    Close Burst 3.

    All Targets in the area take 2d10+Str damage and knocked prone. Also any cover they may have been using is destroyed and any difficult terrain in the area is turned back to normal.
    >> SUPER AGGRO CRAG !!7x7KzlxQrrH 05/14/11(Sat)15:12 No.14925968
    sorry bro i'm not good at crunch.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:16 No.14927639
    It's not OP's blubber fetish, it's the guy who wrote the story's blubber fetish
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:18 No.14927657
    Still promoting the blubber fetish.
    Wouldn't it be more appropriate to depict them as behemoths of muscle and armor instead of human blobs with jelly rolls bursting between their armor plates?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:19 No.14927666
    >Whales having blubber is unrealistic
    Basically what you are saying.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:32 No.14927760
    Did I miss something? Are they whales now?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:38 No.14927815
    Actually no. Professional weight lifters, for example, are more often corpulent than a wall of muscle, and those that are just all muscle tend to run out of energy more quickly. Those that are all muscle are usually bodybuilders first, and don't get in that shape naturally.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)18:49 No.14927897
    And to use a combat example, Greek boxers and gladiators tended to have rather rotund figures: For boxers, it was so the extra padding allowed them to shrug off blows. Gladiators, meanwhile, could get light cuts that looked dangerous for the crowd but had little chance of deep damage.

    The term 'Stout' actually used to mean 'Strong.' Now it means 'Short and fat.'
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:03 No.14928004
    Yes, but there is a difference between being rotund and being a human blob with flapping tats as seen in OP pic.
    It's not the lack of musculature that concerns me, it's the overplaying of fatness.
    You can't state that having a healthy supply of fat gives you more energy and then overlooking that too much fat gives you anything but!
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:10 No.14928064
    Oh baww, someone finds something attractive. Wouldn't be the first time blatant fetish material would be on /tg/

    I would suggest against the level 16 feature. Giving a defender a easier time to get people next to her is huge. It's going to make a lot of people multi-class into Paladin/cleric just to get the feature.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:13 No.14928085
    I have no problem with blatant fetish material, blubber fetish, included. However, trying to shoehorn that fetish into a practical explanation rustles my jimmies.
    If everyone is comfortable admitting that this is a fetish class, then so be it.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:14 No.14928098
    Well, considering they are, like, 7ft tall, I figured it was pretty blatant "magic did it".
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:15 No.14928109
    Excess weight also lowers your centre of gravity. Considering they're described as using massive weapons, the excess weight would help balance them. But mainly they're fat so that they weigh more and can more easily break through walls.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:20 No.14928154
    Yeah, but just a few posts up, someone was trying to reason that being fat makes you more energetic. I get what he was saying, but he seemed to have forgotten just how fan siege knights are supposed to be.
    More of the like going on here: >>14928109

    They're human blobs for you to fap too. No need to justify it with science.
    >> Unit 248 05/14/11(Sat)19:23 No.14928175

    I disagree
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:29 No.14928220
    The point wasn't 'Being fat makes you more energetic,' it was 'Being 500 pounds of muscle is less realistic'
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:32 No.14928249
    I'm not questioning the realism. I'm questioning how making a human blob class is not at least a little inspired by blubber fetish.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:34 No.14928265
    Yyyyyyeah, no thanks.

    Unless it's Brian Blessed, I'm not interested in your fetish fuel bullshit.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:34 No.14928269
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:37 No.14928289
    This one in particular is. But it's possible to have one that is not.

    See: The Bloatmage
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:44 No.14928343
    So there we have it. This is a fetish class. All I needed to hear.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:48 No.14928370
    Sure, but the stories themselves are also way more awesome than they had any right to be, and the concept seemed to have been largely embraced by /Tg/ when it was first posted.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:52 No.14928397
    you gotta realize there's a few folks around here who dismiss anything involving unusual women as "perverted fetish shit" regardless of sexual content or anything else of what it actually is. I was around for the first Siege Knights thread, and am here for this one, and I still think it's a great idea.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:54 No.14928408
    The point isn't whether "some" people will dismiss anything involving women as fetish bullshit, the point is whether its okay to dismiss something that is in fact fetish bullshit by intent as fetish bullshit.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)19:59 No.14928440

    Considering most DM's will be like NOPE.AVI at the prospect of ANY fetish shit entering their games, you have to keep that in mind unless you're playing with a /d/M.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:01 No.14928452
    It's all in how you handle it.

    Tomb Raider was transparent fetish fuel, but that doesn't mean Tomb Raider automatically sucks. The games I mean. The ones that don't suck on their own merits...
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:01 No.14928455
    You know, if you just say "Stupendously strongfat (like a linebacker or offensive lineman) guys in stupendously heavy armor meant to tank and own in close-combat", I'd like this idea.

    But since it's you hamfisting your fetish in, terrible idea.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:02 No.14928458
    frankly, I see no "fetish bullshit" in here at all, save for the protesting folks who seem to think fat women are a fetish regardless of context.

    There is no sexual content being presented here whatsoever that I can see, and, if I may be blunt, I daresay that if these were muscular men instead of large women, there'd likely be no complaints from any of you. But your attitudes are so tangled that you see anything involving women as offensive and something that must be derided as perverted.

    Yes, the characters involved are large women. But there is no fetishism or sexuality being presented. Those claiming otherwise are mistaken; it's all in your own minds.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:07 No.14928496
    Well, I didn't mean fetish bullshit in a strictly negative light... a lot of fetish archetypes sound like they could be damn good characters. For instance, while I don't "get" goo girls or giantesses, a slime creature or a giant seems like a great fuckin RPG character.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:11 No.14928525
    exactly. it's all about not just presentation, but the viewer's perspective.

    Bingo. And that's how this is being presented - not as fetishism, but as a character concept. You must admit, it would certainly be intimidating to see a huge runed metal ball crash through a fortress wall and then unfold into a warrior the size of two stacked bears.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:13 No.14928537
    The guy who wrote the stories does have a fat fetish, but he's made them pretty legitimate in their own right. Which I'm fine with. They're sumo-knights, not a rape-mage.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:17 No.14928561
    Yeah but then I'd giggle as it menacingly wheezes and waddles toward me, it's armor barely being able to contain its flab.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:20 No.14928581
    being huge doesn't necessarily mean slow and poor-of-health. Think of sumo wrestlers, or competetive weightlifters - they're huge and nobody would call them slow and sickly.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:23 No.14928601
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    You do realize that sumo wrestlers have a noted history of health problems and shortened lifespans, to the point that sumo organizations are seriously considering toning back the dietary and size requirements for sumotori, yes?

    That said, I don't really care about realism. It's for a fantasy setting with magic, thus titanic fat knight women are okay with me.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:24 No.14928607
    Look at OP pic, brah.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:25 No.14928615
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    This dude once fought a bear unarmed and won
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:28 No.14928635
    Those health problems tend to be stress-related, from carrying all the extra weight. It's not the same as the constantly-out-of-breath kind of health problems you get when you eat nothing but McDonalds.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:30 No.14928656
    bingo. These women aren't just blubbery lardasses, they're overall big, with ample muscle under that fat.

    Like I said, think of those competetive weightlifters (not the bodybuilders, whose muscles are all for show) - they're huge, built like barrels, but can lift hundreds of pounds with ease.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:31 No.14928663

    I like the idea personally, and the premise is excellent. The art puts me off though, and that's the only thing. Just makes it look like another fat chick fetish picture.

    Other than that, it's solid though, I'd play one.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:33 No.14928677
    That's pretty much what I was driving at.
    I think it's a fine idea, but the art just makes it look like fetish fuel.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:35 No.14928691
    to be fair, the art doesn't do the writing justice, unfortunately.

    Like this bit from the story...
    >It was the first time Enna had seen Castle Jeen without armour on, or anything on really. Enna found her hard to describe. Fat would be the first thing that come to mind. But that seemed to simple a word to describe Jenn. Fat implied that her flesh sagged and drooped, but Jenn's fat was compact and well built. She hadn't let herself go, but rather built herself up, her fat stacked like the strong bricks of mighty castle. Even without armour or weapons, Jenn was a mighty figure that towered over Enna.

    The artist in OP seemed to focus on the "fat" aspect more than the "huge and built" part. There was an awesome pic in the original thread that I wish I'd saved, but which is now unfortunately gone after suptg's recent pruning of low-voted threads.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:36 No.14928697
    That's because the art there WAS originally drawn as fetish fuel, since the originator of the idea does actually have a fat fetish.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:44 No.14928756
    yes, but it seems, to me at least, that the concept has expanded (no pun intended) beyond its fetishy beginning.

    Wonder Woman began as basically the creator's bondage-fetish comic, but she'd hardly be considered so nowadays. Just because something began a certain way doesn't mean it must stay that way.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:49 No.14928799

    I wonder that myself.

    Are they all female or are there blokes too?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:51 No.14928819
    well, as the only fluff we have is from killer-custard's fanfics, and that has only females in the role of Siege Knights (though the halflings in their watchtowers and a couple non-Tower servants are either male or of undisclosed gender) it seems that, yes, it's a prestige class for women only.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:52 No.14928826
    Remove that, and it actually does stop being fetish fuel.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)20:56 No.14928855
    yup, because then it turns from fetish to gay - everyone will roll males because nobody will want to play a female that is anything more than model-thin or any kind of strong.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:00 No.14928893

    Not that guy, I just don't think I could roleplay a woman very well, being a dude, and I like my RP to be consistent, which is why I like to RP as a gender I, y'know, am.

    I just don't believe I'm good enough to warrant trying out being a chick.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:03 No.14928913
    Yes, because women only come in rail thin and landwhale forms.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:05 No.14928925
    according to 4chan... yeah, actually.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:06 No.14928931
    playing a woman is basically like playing a man, but with less-embarassing genitals.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:13 No.14928988
    >They must be female because the zygotes are keyed to female hormones and tissue types

    But if you wanna use the Paragon class for a guy, no one's gonna stop you.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:15 No.14929009
    God this paragon path is SO BAD.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:17 No.14929018
    I'd play it
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:18 No.14929025
    Any specific part or you just don't like it?
    >> Alpharius 05/14/11(Sat)21:18 No.14929026
    This is completely retarded. How did this thread get so big?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:20 No.14929037
    /tg/ likes retarded things?
    >> Zach !!m1zNwNhpIw+ 05/14/11(Sat)21:22 No.14929058
    We should have just made a Dinosaur core class. It would have been funnier.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:24 No.14929083
    the extra damage to buildings i negligible, considering building hardness. Maybe give them some kind of ability to ignore hardness?

    Alternatively, you could give them obscene bonuses on strength checks to burst and object. This might be nicer as noone really wants to keep track of the hp of a wall.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:24 No.14929087
    lots of food and exercise.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:27 No.14929108
    Perhaps the requirement of being a female only to fulfill someone's fetish.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:28 No.14929121
    >They're knightly order
    Wow, you're stupid.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:31 No.14929156
    that's a ridiculous thing to say. There is no fetishism or sexual content in the concept, aside from what your own mind is inventing because you hate the idea of women being strong or weighting more than 115 pounds and thus being something other than a trophy for some macho hero to rescue.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:35 No.14929189
    You're assuming too much. You're forgetting that the premise of this class WAS someone's fat fetish.
    Why is it whenever someone says something critical about anything involving fat women, SOMEONE always has to cry, "Baaawww! You just don't like it because you're afraid of full-bodied women! Not everyone is a toothpick!"
    The only reason there's a gender requirement is because this is a fetish class. It has nothing to do with empowerment or whatever the fuck you think it is. There is no reason siege knights only have to be women.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:40 No.14929225
    At the same time though, the writefaggotry accompanying hasn't been bad, and the whole thing more or less works just fine. It's originally fetish shit, but who gives a fuck?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:40 No.14929230
    A macho hero could still recuse a Siege Knight, as long as if he had invented the crane first.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:42 No.14929235
    like I said earlier, I based the "women only" part of it on the fact the background/fluff we have established the order as women only. Basically, it's our canon, for lack of better term, in this case and since we have nothing from the original creators of the thread (or indeed, anything from the original thread itself at all) that says otherwise, we must take the presented info as given and say men are not part of the Order of the Holy Citadel.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:42 No.14929238
    If you feel that siege knights should only be women, I don't think this has moved past its fetish-based origins.
    And a feature called "bloated form?"
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:43 No.14929242
    exactly. what it began as is clearly not what it's become. note my previous example of Wonder Woman and bondage porn.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:44 No.14929250
    Yeah. Because you're getting your fluff from a FETISHIST. Do you see how I'm making the fetish connection, now?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:45 No.14929259
    so it's gender-restricted. How is that fetishistic, anymore than certain other prestige-classes being race-restricted?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:45 No.14929260
    So why female only if it isn't still fetish fuel?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:46 No.14929266
    Don't know if troll...
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:46 No.14929267
    Honestly, I don't give a shit whether it's women-only or not. All I'm saying is that it's good material, regardless of the fetishy shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:48 No.14929275

    Space Marines.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:48 No.14929276
    I've read the fluff. I have found no sexual content whatsoever. fetishes are sexual in nature.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:48 No.14929282
    You know, I'm gonna rework this and cut out the fetishy shit and make Knights of Erathis.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:49 No.14929284
    Sure, the idea works. But the fetish part brings it down a couple notches.
    This is basically how the logic works.
    "So there's an order of immensely fat knights that use themselves as human wrecking balls. Pretty much the ultimate take class."
    "Cool can I make one?"
    "Only if it's a woman."
    "Because fat men aren't hot."
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:50 No.14929288
    I haven't been involved in this thread at all, and I'm not going to be involved in it beyond this, but your comment:
    >fetishes are sexual in nature
    It should be noted this applies at the point of reaction. A seemingly totally nonsexual thing can be deeply erotic for a particular fetishist. Anyway, that's all. Don't know or care about these fat women (although such a thing is a well established existing fetish).
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:50 No.14929289
    Explain how the Halfling Outrider prestige class having "Halfling" as a prerequisite is similar to an order of fat female-only knights that was admittedly intended to be fetish fuel?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:50 No.14929295
    Mostly because whenever someone says something negative about fat women it's incredibily bigoted and full of assumptions and pig-headed fallacies. But that's just from my experiences on the internet.

    But I agree, keep it a female only PP/Prestige does keep it a lot closer to fetish fuel. Whether this is a problem for you or not, I'm not sure if it matters. OP wants to keep close to the "female sumo paladin", so I don't blame him.

    Though, I can't help but think it would be MUCH better as a 4e theme, rather than just a PP.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:51 No.14929302
    Sexual doesn't have to mean genital-oriented. Take a look at foot fetishists. You can find troves of completely g-rated foot fetish material. We wouldn't find it sexual, and yet that's foot fetishist fap material!
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:52 No.14929313
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    Eh, I could care less what kind of enjoyment somebody gets out of that as long as it doesn't interfere with the actual roleplaying--and judging by the writefaggotry that goes along with this, it actually might be doable for once. Certainly there's some folks I know I wouldn't allow within ten feet of this shit but even so.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:56 No.14929329
    >in this case and since we have nothing from the original creators of the thread (or indeed, anything from the original thread itself at all) that says otherwise,

    Hey homies, Siege Knight Writefag here.

    Alright, I wont lie to you, I do have a thing for big girls, but the major reason why the Siege Knights are all female is because their order is based off a Sisterhood of Nuns, with each member being a avatar of their Goddess' power.

    But if you wanna uses the paragon class for a male character or say write about male siege knights, no one in the world will stop you.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:57 No.14929337
    Wouldn't it make more sense for males to be Siege Knights?

    Why not allow both?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:57 No.14929339
    exactly my point. people are focusing on "BAWW ITS ONLY FOR A WOMAN" and "BAWW THE AUTHOR HAS A FETISH" without seemingly noticing that these are basically incidental or even somewhat irrelevant to the character concept as a whole or to the story itself, which is very well-written and quite thorough in covering details such as the Order's origin, rankings, daily rituals, and even armor aesthetics. it's about as far as you can get from the porn-without-plot fapbait these guys seem to think/expect/want it to be.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:59 No.14929348
    Cool, so there's no problem with male knights then?
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)21:59 No.14929353
    Thank you, sir. There. We have Author-Canon allowance to expand (ha ha) the prestige class to both genders.

    You naysayers just lost about all of your flimsily-justified reasons for complaint.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:03 No.14929372
    For what it's worth, OP never specified it was female-only.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:07 No.14929405
    yes, but the original thread (now long gone) that spawned the idea and later the writing to support said idea did specify female-only. If memory serves me correctly, the original thread's author said it sprung from a dream he had about women dressed like castles flying through walls.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:08 No.14929413
    Must've been a wet dream.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:14 No.14929459
    It wasn't a dream where I got the idea from, I can never remember my dreams and when I do, they're never that cool

    Fuck me, I can't remember where the idea came from now. Might of been a thread about would your character choice to get fat to get superpower or something
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:17 No.14929489
    Ah. Perhaps it was someone else in the thread who said that, then.

    Either way, I wish I had the art that eventually came from that thread.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:18 No.14929493
    I never said my complaints weren't flimsy. That was actually the only complaint I had about it and the only thing that made it seem like fetish material. I have absolutely no problem with it now.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:22 No.14929515
    hurrah! everyone's happy. Now let's see if we can do some more work with this concept. or at least make it worthy of archival.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:25 No.14929540
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    >Either way, I wish I had the art that eventually came from that thread.

    Well if it makes you feel better, Op's pic is the only offical Siege Knight picture, the rest were just fat lady wearing bits of armour.

    Save for this one which I came up with long ago, and it aint fantastic.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:31 No.14929576
    Wait... I think that's the pic I was talking about! I love how that one turned out, and felt so bad I never got around to saving it. A bit rough, but it actually shows bulk and mass, not just flabbiness, and seemed much more befitting the Siege Knight's description than just "tubby chick in castle-shaped armor".
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:36 No.14929626
    Except it fits that exact description to a T...
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:46 No.14929712
    yeah, I meant "flabby", not "tubby". OP's pic is flabby, wih rolls and sags and such. That pic is just plain BIG, with no apparent fat-sag to be seen. Like the fic said:

    >Fat would be the first thing that come to mind. But that seemed to simple a word to describe Jenn. Fat implied that her flesh sagged and drooped, but Jenn's body was compact and well built. She hadn't let herself go to flab, but rather built herself up, stacked like the strong bricks of a mighty castle.

    They're big, but like a competitor, not someone who just eats and sleeps all day. There's muscle under that fat.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)22:58 No.14929815
    sooo... archive? we've got fluff, crunch, and, after the gender/fetish issue got settled, some reasonable postings...
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:02 No.14929847
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    If we expand the Siege Knights' concept anymore, they're going to spill over to /sp/ and /toy/

    But here's something I just made up

    Catapults: As masters of Siege Warfare, Catapults are vial to the Siege Knights. In deed, the Siege Knights tactic of throwing themselves at their foe's castles walls would be impossible without such warmachines. But while most generals see them as a means to a end, Siege Knights share bond with their catapults as close as their sisters in arms. This is because each catapult is hand built by the Siege Knights.
    During their training, when young Siege Knights are placed in their warband, they are told to contrust a catapult powerful enough to lauch themselves with. This will take months of testing, building and learning the insides and out of Siege warfare. But when the Catapult passes finally mets the Siege Knights standard, normally but lauching a large Siege Knight through a wall without the catapult breaking under the weight, it is offically crowned with a title, normally something dignified like 'Lady Rose' or 'Victoria Gold.' At this point each Siege Knight who helped make the catapult gives up an item of great importance and attaches it to the Catapult, sealing a bond with the Catapult and with their fellow Siege Knights. It's not uncommon to see catapult decrated with priceless gems, pieces of artwork or banners taken from important battles.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:04 No.14929866
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    Should the catapult come under attack, Siege Knights will fight to the death to protect them and should they become damaged in the fight, their Siege Knights will spend countless nights repairing them. Should they not be able to save them, the Siege Knights to give their catapults the same funnel ceremony they would their fellow comrades.
    Smaller Siege Weapons like the Ballistas are also used, but the Siege Knights don't see them as being important as catapults since they can't lift their weight. They tend to declare them to be the pets of their Catapults and will give them a cute pet name like 'Rex' or 'Mr Giggles' and will give them to their Catapults.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:07 No.14929903
    Hey go ahead man
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:09 No.14929915
    At first I started to laugh, but then I thought about it a bit... it fits them, and really, in context, isn't any stranger than a warrior naming a favored axe or sword something like Foecleaver or Doombane or whatever.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:11 No.14929945
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    To all the people saying the pic is too flabby, I have taken your concerns made made an improved picture
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:16 No.14929987
    Hey Sweet, thanks!

    Of course if I was to make whine about that picture, it's that the head's too big and she could be a bit more bulkier.

    But other than that, it's awesome
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:21 No.14930038
    new art, and an archival! Good for us!

    Hmm, since, with author's blessing, the gender-restriction is lifted, should we try fluffing the male side of the order as well? I mean, the Order of the Holy Citadel, going by canon, is female-only, but what sort of background would a male faction have, to end up with similar mass and protective power, without simply copying them and swapping crotchplates?

    Basically, we have our Sisters of Battle, now we need our Guardsmen, to mangle some 40K analogies.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:30 No.14930124
    Well for guardsmen, how about a guild of Chef Militia? A group of chefs who've had it to here with bandits and wrong-doers burning down their villages, attacking their families and running out on the bill?

    A typical chef warrior is stout and well-built, armed with countless butcher knives and can crack a man's skull with a frying pan. They might not get as big as Siege Knights but there will be alot more of them, spread out though the realm.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:35 No.14930168
    They would also be skilled in making healing potions and under-the-counter poisons.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:38 No.14930189
    I added a note that they can ignore the hardness of objects when flung into them (Including Weight-Bearing Blow.) I also made Immense Size improve their carrying capacity by up to four times it's base at maximum level... It's fairly minor, but better represents their phenomenal strength.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:41 No.14930233

    Interesting. So, these male Warchefs (not warchiefs, that's something else) could act kinda like the backup/support-team for the female Siege Knights tanking/meatshield role? Nice twist on the usual gender-balance.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:48 No.14930300
    Welll they're individual groups. The Siege Knights are warrior-priestesses of their Goddess while the Chef Militia were formed to protect their Inns and restaurants from invaders, but they share the same ideals and will work together if need be.
    >> Anonymous 05/14/11(Sat)23:57 No.14930398
    What about a group of pirate-hunters who launch themselves out of canons to take over enemy ships?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:00 No.14930433
    well yeah, I knew that, I just found it interesting how their roles meshed together while being an inversion of the "man leads while woman stands back" cliche.

    So, we've established Siege Knights' iconic aspect (other than sheer bulk) is their armor, sculpted to make them resemble walking castles, to the point higher-ranking members even have minor illusion enchantments that make it seem tiny people live in said castle.

    What is the distinguishing trait of the Chef Militia?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:02 No.14930450
    >rather than allow gender equality, intensify the fetish shit by having male feeders inflate the giant women
    Jesus Christ /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:03 No.14930458
    Shouldn't siege knights excel at smashing THROUGH defenses, you know - laying siege, rather than resisting sieges?

    These aren't siege knights, these are victims of siege knights waiting to happen.

    The real siege knights are parkour goblins running up castle walls.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:04 No.14930466
    ooh, I like that idea.

    "Captain! Hunter ships off the starboard bow! They're signaling us to prepare for boarding... but they're also readying cannons!"

    "Bah... they must be fools to think we're... BY THE GODS! THEY'RE SHOOTING THEMSELVES AT US!"
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:04 No.14930477
    >What is the distinguishing trait of the Chef Militia?

    Big fucking falchions that look a lot like meat cleavers?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:05 No.14930482
    they DO smash through defenses. Literally. By catapulting themselves through enemy walls.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:12 No.14930550

    For some reason, I can see a man in the midst of a huge battle, surrounded by Siege Knights locked in combat. The man is much smaller than his comrades, but no less effective. His methods for fighting are as exotic as his favored method of cooking, and his dexterity allows him to strike foes his lumbering friends could never. His speed the perfect counter to his ally's strength, darting from one opponent to the next. He fights with a martial art his sisters know as "kung fu", he strikes with the same outlandish tools he use to prepare their oversized meals, a large open pan, known as a "wok", and a blunt ladle-like utensil. With these improvised weapons, he smites the small quick enemies that could stop a Siege Knight if their numbers went unchecked.

    He and his ilk are a class of warrior chefs. A long standing tradition, descendant from a foreign land. As an all male order, handed from father to son (sometimes with a Siege Knight mother, no less) they balance and complement the Siege Knight's Holy Order (ignore this part if it's not your canon) Thus is the brand of the Eastern Chef's Battle Guild, earning the respect of the Siege Knights, and the loving, joking nickname "Kung Fu Cooks"

    Just an idea.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:14 No.14930560
    Nice work.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:14 No.14930561
    >Not calling them Iron Chefs
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:16 No.14930584
    Well there are Siege Knights like that from the Venice themed port city of Aquaimo. Their armour is crafted from special lightwieght wood and shaped like ship hulls to allow them float on water. They tend to swim up the side of a ship, smash a hole in the side of it, then swim away as it sinks.

    canons are still rather primative in the Siege Knights time and they still favour their Catapults, but some Siege Knights have been known to craft cannons armour to ward off foes and be longer and fearsome.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:17 No.14930588
    You wanna risk the wrath of Chairman Kaga?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:17 No.14930592
    Their armour is lighter, but tends to be fireproof and resemble a Chef's outfit. Unlike the Siege Knights, they are adept at minor magic spells. These spells tend to either be fire-based or food-related. They gain the ability to grease objects. create mass Goodberries, and purify food. In terms of offence, they get strong fire spells.

    Some can also light themselves on fire, protected by their special armor, at which point they can fly into a rage where they cannot cast any spells but intermix martial arts strikes - enchanced by fire - with slashes from their butcher knives.
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)00:18 No.14930597

    As the writefag for that little fic, I wholeheartedly approve!

    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)00:18 No.14930602

    He'll be the Guild Leader
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:23 No.14930652

    These together. Kung-fu chefs that light themselves on fire
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:31 No.14930733
    Siege Knight writefag, I'm sort of seeing these guys, the kung fu chefs, as the wandering mysterious old man from the east. They seem like traveling chefs who want no trouble, but really their cookery related kung-fu masters, a sort of Jackie Chan like fighting style.

    Their greatest gift however is to teach young Siege Knights how to over come their anger and doubt and the importance of defending the innocent.

    Iron Chefs however I'm seeing more as a rival order for the Siege Knights, which the old chefs teach them the importance of getting along.
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)00:39 No.14930822

    So, less Drunken Boxer, more Drunken Master? Not so much combat support, as much as spiritual guidance?

    I'm cool with that.

    Although I'm tempted to write about a small band of Iron Chef apprentices who are told by their master (called Chairmen in the Iron Chef order) to journey with a Siege Knight warband (much to their initial chagrin), with the lead Chef's and Siege Knight's tempers flaring. They soon develop a friendship, respect for their differences, and eventually a loving relationship. (If you're into fetishy stuff, this could be worked into feederism, if not, that aspect could be ignored)

    But I've never really been one for longer writing. You want to take this one?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:41 No.14930842
    the more I read about these chef guys, the less they seem like a male-oriented remake of the all-female Order (that is, different fluff, same crunch as their prestige class), and more like a completely different concept/class altogether...

    So I guess the question is, what sort of reasons would a guy have to balloon up to about 500 pounds or so and launch himself through brick walls? Y'know, other than impersonating the Kool-Aid Man?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:42 No.14930851
    I would love to feature them in a story in the near future, if you don't mind me using your ideas.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:43 No.14930865
    What if they're Rangers dedicated to nature with Chosen Enemy: Cities?
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)00:45 No.14930888

    I wouldn't mind at all. Do you have anything you can be contacted by? I'd love to do a collaboration of some sort, if at all possible.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:48 No.14930915
    >So I guess the question is, what sort of reasons would a guy have to balloon up to about 500 pounds or so and launch himself through brick walls? Y'know, other than impersonating the Kool-Aid Man?

    The Siege Knights do this because their Goddess Civis was a massive fat princess who launched herself at the giant demon fortress that was destorying her homeland.

    And by giant demon fortress, I mean a giant demon who takes the form of a living flying citadel.

    The Siege Knights are simply following in her example.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:48 No.14930918
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    >Chosen Enemy: Cities
    >mfw there's a guy in my fucking group who would totally try to do something like that if he thought it would get him somewhere
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:50 No.14930936
    Dunno about rangers, but I just pictured a big guy wearing armor that basically made him look like a boulder when posed right (like how the Knights' armor had bits that made them resemble cannonballs at first shot) and, well, think of the Gorons from the Zelda series, rolling along and crashing into things. That's how they charge into battle.

    Siege Knights catapult into your fortress.
    These guys (we need a name here) just run your ass over.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:52 No.14930953
    >>Favoured Enemy

    Herp derp

    >>Capcha: Icelich Jury
    Holy hell, regardless of context that sounds awesome
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:54 No.14930976

    How about Cannon Brawlers? They'll use cannons to get more momentum or something? They don't fly like the fat ladies, so they aren't as adept as siege warfare, but they brawl on land like none other.

    Barring that, just "Chargers"?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)00:55 No.14930981
    Cannonball Chargers?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:00 No.14931017

    Cannon Chargers? Awesome. I like that. Using modified cannons to speed up and plow through enemy lines and buildings too low or small for the Siege Knights to attack properly.

    Like the artillery to their infantry, or something.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:02 No.14931035
    Well Siege Knights and Iron Chef could both crash into buildings are run over people, which is why there's such a rivalry.

    I'm picturing when ever these two met, there's a great deal of grim stares and pushing each other back with the bulk of their stomachs alone, trying to prove who's the biggest, like bulls tangling horns.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:11 No.14931113
    drawfag needed?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:16 No.14931149
    Would be nice
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)01:16 No.14931156

    I like to think the Iron Chefs are much smaller, more agile combatants when compared to Siege Knights, think Spider-Man's fighting Style compared to the Juggernaut's.

    But, that's not to say it's the de facto view of them. Since they're a smaller (pun intended) organisation, that'd leave much more room for variation and different factions.

    While all Iron Chefs learn Martial arts, cooking magic, and train their bodies, many different groups focus or specialize. Like, the Mountain chefs, Huge men who specialize in greasy cooking, and growing in bulk like the Siege Knights. Or the Chefs of the plains, whose conservative cooking style compliments their belief that martial arts take priority over magic. Or even the Szechuan, smaller men whose legendary spicy dishes are a testament to their fierce fire magic.

    Again, all ideas at this point. Take them as you like them.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:18 No.14931177
    That could work too... different schools of thought, different styles of cooking.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:29 No.14931273
    bump for further ideas.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:45 No.14931426
    one more bump
    >> More Iron Chef lore The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)01:46 No.14931431

    The methods passed down from Father to Son are some of the most highly kept secrets the Iron Chefs have. Each school taking pride in the minute differences in their dishes, the subtle change in stance that differentiates them from their ilk.

    This is not to say that the daughters are left out. Quite the opposite in fact, as many of the Iron Chefs' finest have been Ladies of battle, but the grueling regiment of training, and days standing behind a roaring fire often do not sit well with young girls. Many of them find their calling in being an Iron Chefs' greatest source of supplies. The Iron Gardener

    These women of the Iron line are considered some of the finest gardeners and farmers in all the world. Some say they can cull the finest herbs and spices from rock if they had to , while others say that the inherent nurturing energy of these women could make the earth feed an army in less than a week.

    To an impartial observer, however, one could note that the Iron Gardeners share very similar magical properties and techniques to that of the Siege Knights in the respect of agriculture. A style of amazing similarity cultivated on a different side of the world no less. However, the Iron Chefs desire for the finest ingredients would seem quite compatible with the non-combat portions of Siege Knights culture, and indeed may stand as a small testament to the possible partnership of the two guilds.

    This has not gone unnoticed by the highest echelons of the Iron Chefs, the Chairmen.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:51 No.14931472
    Well I figure it might go something like this:

    The Guild of Chef Militia: A guild of civic minded chefs which was formed when they grew tired of bandits attacking their Inns. The Guild is the self appointed defencers of city market and lonely Inns in the forests, many robbers attack a seemingly defenceless tavern, only to be driven off by a mob of Chef Militiamen. Chef Militiamen are normally the sons of chefs, trained to defend their homes. There's no offical uniform, but they'll typical wear their chef uniform under whatever armour they can afford. They weld the weapons of their trade, normally a butch knife in each hand with a few strapped around their belt as back ups. If knifes can not be found then frying pans, rolling pins or whatever's handy will do. The Siege Knights are thankful for their services, defencing places the Siege Knights don't have the number to, but most city guards would call them a rowdy mob at best.

    Magic Bakers: Some might say that there's no greater magic than cooking, Magic Bakers take this as fact. These Chef-styled alchemists believe that magic is best catched in cooking and dispite their name, do more than baking. Cupcakes that make anyone your friend, Ale to give the strength of a giant, Peppers that let you breath fire, all these are the crafts of the Magic Bakers. Siege Knights share a good relationship, with some of them knowing a few of the Magic Bakers' spell and the Chef Militia can always be counted on protecting them from danger. Magic Bakers tend to dress in strangely decorated chef aprons and tend to be quite porky due to their work. There are skinny Bakers, but few trust them. 'Never trust a skinny baker' as the old saying goes.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)01:53 No.14931494
    Nice. Do we get to know more about the Chairmen or is he to remain in the shadows?
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)02:02 No.14931581

    But, as the youngest Iron Chefs step forward, young, brash, and untested by the world, the future seems uncertain.

    Being the first generation to truly grow up in this western land, many find themselves dropping their Chefs' names (given to them by thier fathers and masters) such as the outlandish "Won Fei Han", or "Xian Wu Lei", in favor of more local names i.e. "Johnathon Steelpot", or even birth names. This trend, while first alarming to the Chairmen, has become more accepted over time, and has even lead to the creation of new rules, such as "Chefs' names will be used in the kitchen". It should be noted, however, that the "kitchen" to an Iron Chef is either a place where food is prepared, or where battle is taking place.

    It is with moderate mistrust that this new generation of battling cooks views the Siege Knights, as many have yet to cultivate the sense of wisdom their masters have grown. But that is not to say a complete disrespect, for many of the young chefs see what the Chairmen may have in mind when they consider the Siege Knights worthy allies. That a mountain of metal and flesh, who dwarf the chefs many time over, could one day make a very good customer, and to attract a customer that already knows how to feed herself, one must be the best at what he does, thus pushing the Iron Chefs ever forward. To assist a colossus in battle, one must be the swiftest they can be, thus making the Iron Chefs even stronger.

    It is with this thought in mind that while the future of the Iron Chefs seems uncertain in the High Dove region, the inclusion of the Siege Knights make it uncertain, but hopeful.
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)02:09 No.14931641
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    Well, I'm only writing the lore of the Eastern Chefs, so I see no reason these styles may not coexist (other than the Siege Knight writefag saying kill it.)

    I was thinking Chairman could be a title, similar to Grandmaster, in that each school would have one, and they would gather together to guide the fate of the Iron Chefs. Perhaps they could gather under one Grand Chairmaster...

    Pic related.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)02:39 No.14931969
    "Just friendly competition, dear boy, let me tell you the dangers of friendly competition! It was the during the siege of the Castle of Thunderhill. The castle was a rather tough nut to crack and the wizard holed up from there wasn't making things easier. So I sent a request to Highdove to send the Siege Knights. Big woman they were, couldn't fit into this Barracks without breaking a hole in the wall, which is what they do best.
    What I didn't know at the time was that this other band of knights calling themselves the 'Iron Chefs.' Bunch of foreign types from the east chasing after the wizard who was locked up in the castle. So there I was, talking to the commander of the Siege Knights, big as a house she was, when the commander of the Iron Chef struts in. Funny little fellow he was, or funny big fellow I should say as he was just as big as the lady paladin. There may of been only three people in that tent, but I tell you dear boy, that tent had never felt so crowded.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)02:40 No.14931975
    Of course, they take one look at each and decide they don't like each other. They stroll up to each other and slam their stomach together, each trying to push each other over. Hands on hips, letting their bellys doing the talking. Of course, they're still acting all polite to me, answer whatever question I ask, but they never break their grim stares from one another, like a pair ex-lovers, but for the love of the gods, dear boy, never say that to either of them.
    Of course the meeting is going nowhere. The horrible sound of the metal plates on their belly grind against each other was enough to drown out any brilliant plan I was telling them. So at last, I had enough. I decided to cunning put their rivaly to good use. I offered a bottle of my great-great grandfather's best wine, rest his soul, to whoever could take the castle for me.

    Long story short, I had to spend the next week explaining to our beloved Queen why the Castle of Thunderhill, a castle she wanted me to take back, now had to be renamed the Flat barren plain of Thunderhill."

    -General Rex Ricardo explaining to his division why he had banned pitfights.
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)02:44 No.14932026
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    Ah the Mountain Clan Chefs. Known to be larger than life in all they do.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)02:50 No.14932098
    That's how I pictured the Iron Chefs would look like, maybe with more armour and less beard.

    Keep the mustache however
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)03:05 No.14932241
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    I still would like to keep some sects of the Iron Chefs in line with my original vision of small speedsters, flitting about the battlefield between massive Siege Knights, but I'm okay with the idea of the Mountain Clan being the largest (heheh) and most prominent group within the Iron Chefs Order.

    Pic related, it's a Szechuan Chef preparing to roast.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)03:13 No.14932317
    Ah I see where you're going with this. Siege Knights would probably hold a rivaly against the Mountian Clan, but would regard the smaller one with equal parts curiosity and mistrust. How does someone so skinny know so much about food?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)03:33 No.14932461
    >>I was thinking Chairman could be a title, similar to Grandmaster, in that each school would have one, and they would gather together to guide the fate of the Iron Chefs. Perhaps they could gather under one Grand Chairmaster...

    Going to have to disagree on that one. The Chairman is above any one school. The pinnacle of cuisine mastery is the assumption of the title Iron Chef Dwarven, Iron Chef French, etc.

    The Chairman is an enigmatic figure who neither cooks nor judges, but whom all the Iron Chefs bow to. So it has always been.

    Speculation runs rampant. Aspiring Iron Chefs whisper amongst themselves that the Chairman is not of this world. That he revealed secrets of cooking to their ancestors in exchange for binding pacts upon their descendants. But that is only the gossip of chef de parties.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)03:34 No.14932470
    Armour: One of the ironic features of a Siege Knights, other than her giant size, is her armour. Their armour is patterned after grand cities and citadels of the world. It however is not built all in one go as with most armour. Since Siege Knights never stop growing, a suit of armour that was only one size would be pointless. Instead they armour is built up over the years. Siege Knight Armour starts off as a humble suit of leather armour a Siege Knight is given when she first begins training. As she grows, she is taught how to make it bigger adding extra leather and metal plates. Indeed, the Siege Knights considered it a great achievement when a young novice's armour splits for the first time due to the extra weight she's put on.
    Each Siege Knight crafts her armour after the city she comes from or was born closest to. Siege Knights from Highdove style their armour with pearl white towers and crimson banners, while those from Frosthammer style their armour with frost bitten iron walls and wolf pelts, though always keeping a warm miniature pub close to her heart. While Siege Knights are free to style their armour as they wish, they normally stick with a theme closest by their company. Siege Knight who live in the part of the Holy Citadel called Rose Wall decorate their armour with roses while those stationed near Highdove port have a model of the flagship, HDS Seabird, crafted onto their helmets.
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)03:37 No.14932490
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    I think it'd make for a good balance those who'd want a male counterpart to Siege Knights, and people like myself who'd want to play a more supporting role to them, and allow for different interaction with them.

    Pic related for more mountain clan!
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)03:38 No.14932503

    >I'm okay with this.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)03:58 No.14932645
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    The armour of a Siege Knights is covered in small towers. Many of these are badges of service. Often when a Siege Knight's company takes a castle, a miniature tower based off the style of the castle is fixed to their armour, to show that she took part of the Siege Knights. A great number of these are gifts, given to them by grateful villagers and nobles for saving their homes and cities. Some of them are given in the hopes of impress the Siege Knights, as is the case of Elves. Young Elven men, who many regard as natural chubby chasers, will spend days crafting the best tower they can make in hopes of impressing a Siege Knight, as was the case when Citadel Charlotte, who was gifted with some many miniature elven towers, a large colony of pixies mistook her for their long lost city and took residence in her armour.
    While the towers on their armour may look like they're just for show, they also have a practical use. Thanks to magical enchantments given to them when a Siege Knight reaches the rank of Fortress, the towers will shoot tiny fire arrows at attackers. While not enough to kill someone, it will daze them long enough for a Siege Knight to get the upper hand in combat. Those wanting something more deadly fix miniature Ballistas and stone throwers to their armour, which during combat, come to life and fire at anyone trying to flank the Siege Knight, making her a very difficult opponent indeed. Ever since the discovery of gunpowder, there have been come attempts to fix cannons to the Siege Knights' Armour. Rosa Bella the Loud of the port city of Aquaimo had 5 of them fixed to her armour and refused to hear a word against it. Thanks to the cannons, she can't hear much of anything these days.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)04:07 No.14932692
    Was the Chairman the one who granted Civis her godhood?
    >> The Kung Fu Cook of the Iron Chefs 05/15/11(Sun)04:12 No.14932707

    Who knows?

    Although I wouldn't say that around any devout Siege Knight, you may be accidentally sat on for a statement like that...
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)04:43 No.14932915
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    >>The Siege Knights
    Killer-custard if you read this pleeeease write more!!!! It's so awesome!!!
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)05:16 No.14933060
    I plan to, bro, but if you like my stuff, feel free to comment on the devart page.

    But in the meantime, this will have to do.

    Halflings: The Siege Knights have always had a close bond with Halflings. It's said that a Halfling witch was the one who gave Civis her divine powers. As a result, the Order feels honour bond to protect Halfling Villages. In exchange, Halflings serve as the Siege Knights, for if one thing that Halflings are good at its cooking big, hearty meals. Fighting however is not their greatest strength or at least, fighting fair. When something threatens a Halfling, he will climb the tallest thing he can find and start throwing things at it, spears, stones or either insults if he has nothing else on hand.
    Such as Royal Citadel Millie of Greenwall found out when she went to visit a small halfling village for a friendly get together. They had just finished 2nd Bunch and were about to move onto 3rd, when a band of rampaging orcs attacked. As Grand Citadel Millie went to repel them, the Halflings climbed the tallest thing they could find in the village, which was Millie (and that including the buildings and trees.) And so it was Grand Citadel Millie fought off a warband of Orcs with a whole village of Halflings riding on her shoulders, throwing things at the orcs and calling them names Luckily, Millie was a kind sort and could see the advantage that having a Halfling archer on her back brought and so it was that the Siege Knights began wearing Halfling Towers on their back.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)05:24 No.14933108
    A halfling rangers duties are many duties. he acts as his Siege Knight's lookout, scout, horn blower, archer, signaller, record keeper and taunter. Some Halflings have been known to go beyond the call of duty and defend their Siege Knight from attackers should she be heavily wounded in battle. Most halflings would rather not do this, so keep plenty of healing potions ready should their Siege Knight get hurt.
    While Halflings are most commonly suited for this role, other races have been known to ride in the tower. Gnomes and even Goblins have been used when Halflings were unavailable. Siege Knight see it as a sign of strength to see how many and how big of a ranger she can carry. Humans, elves and a number of other races were carried by the Siege Knights to show off their strength, elves never needing a second invitation to climb a Siege Knight. However when they began carrying younger Siege Knights in their towers, the Royal Citadels had to put their foot down, banning anyone taller than 4 foot from riding in a Siege Knight's tower. As of late, some Siege Knight have been trying to tall dwarves into riding in their towers, but they're not having any of that!
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)05:52 No.14933306
    I think that goes against their code of honor.

    Of course when these Paladins fall, pray they dont fall on you.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)06:23 No.14933481
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)06:29 No.14933516
    I do not have a DA account I think I should get one.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)08:48 No.14934242
    here some more fluff

    The Siege Knights of FrostHammer.
    The Siege Knights from the frozen peaks of Frosthammer are a hearty if not grim lot. They stand a good few inches taller than other Siege Knights and are typically paled skinned with either blonde, red or even snow white hair. They make their home in the citadel of "Iron Guts," a fortress located so high in the Frosthammer mountains, that it's possible to see the Holy Citadel from hundreds of miles away. The Fortress is what they would call practical, but most outsiders would call depressing. It's a cold dark iron affair, all angular and square with fearsome looking spikes on their walls that is always covered in snow. Any warmth to found comes from the few fires inside the citadel and that includes the Siege Knights themselves.
    The Siege Knights of Iron Guts are a cold lot. They favour hard work and discipline above all, regarding outsiders as being soft and weak and they've not above sharing this opinion with other Siege Knights. No one trains harder than them or is more committed to the Order's cause. Such things as diplomacy and friendly chitchat are just wastes of time. This attitude has given them the reputation of being merciless, unfeeling and overall unlikeable. However their cold personality melts away by the fires of a warm tavern.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)08:49 No.14934247
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    After hard days training, there's nothing the Siege Knights of Frosthammer like better than to fight a good tavern and get quite drunk. Frosthammer is famous for its stout ale and no one likes it better that the Siege Knights. They drink and laugh and sing all though out the night. One would think they're completely different people. However the Iron Guts Siege Knights tend to like their ale a bit too much and are often roaring drunk before the night is through. Many young tavern boys have had to spend their nights fighting off the affections of a drunken knight or roll one out the door after she's passed out. It's no wonder that Frosthammer's tavern boys are so well muscled.

    Frosthammer is also home to a number wild beasts, wolves being the most common, some as big as horses! The Siege Knights of Iron Guts regularly hunt down these monsters for sport and a woman isn't an officially knight until she's killed her first wolf. As a result it's a common sight for Iron guts Knights to hang wolf pelts off their armour. They also tame wolves for warhounds. They don't kindly to anyone thinking they're pets, but that doesn't stop the Siege Knights feeding them scraps from the dinner table.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)09:17 No.14934385
    I love this thread.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)09:21 No.14934407
    I like it as a friend
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)10:06 No.14934655
    I see what you did there.
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)10:07 No.14934659
    >But that is only the gossip of chef de parties.

    You should be careful of chef de parties, for they bake more than they say
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)11:21 No.14935082
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    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)14:04 No.14936137
    Anything else?
    >> Anonymous 05/15/11(Sun)19:32 No.14938885
         File1305502342.jpg-(100 KB, 550x550, protomenfatherofdeath.jpg)
    100 KB
    >Chosen Enemy: Cities
    >mfw there's a guy in my fucking group who would totally try to do something like that if he thought it would get him somewhere

    By chance is his name Joe?

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