Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1278476327.jpg-(317 KB, 1280x946, 1271588175066.jpg)
    317 KB THE DEATH STAR WAS AN INSIDE JOB Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:18 No.10982473  

    1. What sane engineer would leave such an obvious engineering flaw?

    2. The targeting computer on an Incom T-65 X-Wing takes fifteen seconds to acquire a three meter target. If the X-Wing that supposedly destroyed the Death Star was traveling at its reported speed, the computer would have only had ten seconds to acquire the target.

    3. Why did Vader go into space during the attack?

    4. The planet Alderaan was a "dry run" for the explosive device that destroyed the Death Star.

    5. Genetic testing shows past 70% accuracy that the prominent "Rebels" Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa are Vader's children. Why would Vader raise a hand against his children?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:20 No.10982509

    lmfao nerf herder.

    Everyone knows hes just a robot built by the emperor
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:23 No.10982565

    Someone hasnt seen the leaked holofootage of his horribly scarred head.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:24 No.10982587
    I am so sick of conspiracy theorists spamming the boards, next they are going to tell us that Vader is some sort of magician who kills his own soldiers using archaic evil powers.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:25 No.10982594
    fucking JEDIS DID DS! Palpatine was right to kill them, that's why I joined the Peace Brigade.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:25 No.10982611

    underage detected.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:26 No.10982623
    You're right, but most people just don't want to hear this stuff. It's a lot more comfortable to believe a bunch of terrorist insurgents blew up the symbol of your empire's strength than the accept that your own leadership would do such a thing.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:26 No.10982627

    and before anyone starts spouting that 'force' bullshit, vader obviously has an imperial prototype micro tractor beam array installed. that's how it can pick up stuff and choke people.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:28 No.10982656
    5. Hours prior to the destruction of the Death Star, an unknown freighter was taken aboard. Survivor's accounts say that it was brought in with a tractor beam. Stormtrooper infantrymen specialized in port security swept the entire vessel repeatedly and found no signs of life. The first shift was relieved by an unknown second shift. Over the course of fifteen minutes, the detention block suffered a catastrophic security breach, carried out by two to four unidentified men in Stormtrooper uniforms. During this time, no senior officers were watching the vessel. Was this security breach orchestrated so that the final parts of the device could be unloaded?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:29 No.10982676
         File1278476940.jpg-(48 KB, 600x800, comic325.jpg)
    48 KB
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:29 No.10982682
    You fucking make me sick. My brother was stationed on the Death Star when those fucking terrorist rebels attacked. And you're trying to say they're innocent?


    And I'll be joining up next cycle to make sure those filthy terrorists get what's coming to them. I've heard from my dad that there's plans in the works for another orbital station, maybe I'll apply for a position there.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:29 No.10982695
    We also know that the Empire KNEW about the engineering flaw long before the destruction of the Death Star.

    Then we're to believe that two droids, completely unguided by any organic lifeforms managed to evade capture against a full Star Destroyer of troops, and link up with rebels.

    Wake up sheeple!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:31 No.10982720
    6. On 9/10/0BBY, a Correlian corvette freighter flying a diplomatic flag was intercepted over Tatooine after a brief scuffle. Representatives from Alderaan, including Leia Organa, were on board. Some were shuttled over to the Death Star, and reportedly even saw their homeworld destroyed. What is going on here? Did Organa sell out her homeworld just so that Vader and Palpatine could be certain that their explosives would do the trick?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:33 No.10982760
    I'm telling you man, The Emperor and Mon Mothma are in cahoots, there's no way she could survive this long without inside help.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:35 No.10982796
    Two droids on a DESERT PLANET, which is KNOWN to be harsh to machines. In fact, Lieutenant Tagrog of the 478th Stormtrooper Legion SPECIFICALLY recalled tracking the droids by a sparse trail of parts in the desert that eventually showed them to have been taken by hostile Jawas. A firefight ensued near a moisture farmer's residence, and the men of the 478th were forced to neutralize both the Jawas and the farmer.

    So, what we have is an unbelievable scenario; what was really in that escape pod? Lt. Tagrog never found the droids at the scene. Who go there first? Was the pod some kind of "go signal?"
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:48 No.10983014
    So you're telling me that some welfare queen dropout who just made it through the cadre on Carida is the first and last word on droid mechanics and desert tracking? Tagrog was from CORELLIA for fuck's sake! He grew up in a TEMPERATE climate and Sandtrooper was NOT his specialty, but he was stop-lossed into it.
    >> $taunche 07/07/10(Wed)00:48 No.10983017
    How long dose it take to search one swamp for a f%$&ing jedi

    dey never caught Yoda dey never caught Obiwan and the empire iz never gona catch mothma
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:53 No.10983094
    spoiler: jedi aren't real, they're made up so the Empire can claim to fight something every few years.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:54 No.10983117
    Did anyone notice the street closures when Vader visited Cloud City? Civilians never even saw the guy. Hell, I'm a journalist and I wasn't allowed within a hundred miles of the place, press pass be damned. The only droid that had a record of his presence was found blasted to pieces after a firefight between the Imperial Stormtroopers and an "unknown rebel group." Yeah, sounds very likely. Not to mention there were representatives of Jabba's bounty hunters in the area, and Vader was seen handing over a huge block of carbonite into their possession. How deep does this thing go?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:56 No.10983152
    The Death Star and Rebellion are just distracting you. They spoon out the crap and you eat it up.

    It's the Toydarians that are shitting up the whole galaxy, wheedling scum.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)00:56 No.10983164
    Holovisual evidence and recordings from Rebel Headquarters at the time of the attack indicate that Luke Skywalker DEACTIVATED his targetting computer shortly before firing his proton torpedoes.

    Proton torpedoes are guided by their targetting system.

    They are not guided by anything else.

    In order to hit the supposed "weak spot" on the Death Star from the position Luke's X-Wing was flying at, we would have to have the torpedoes make a right turn directly over the entry to the port. THIS IS WHAT IS ACTUALLY SHOWN IN THE HOLOVID FILM; PROTON TORPEDOES SUPPOSEDLY WITH --NO-- GUIDANCE SYSTEM MAKING A 90-DEGREE TURN INTO THE EXHAUST VENT.

    Yet the computer targetting system that would have told the torpedoes to turn? WASN'T EVEN ON.

    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:01 No.10983246
    Go back to stormfront with that shit, dude. All the Toydarians want to do is live in peace. Yes, the Corporate Sector is war-torn and has a lot of racial hatred, but it's getting better, and the last thing that needs to happen is a bunch of keyboard warriors on Coruscant talking about this race or that race.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:09 No.10983365
    >All the Toydarians want to do is live in peace.
    Tell that to the noble Tuskens whose ancestral homeland they've stolen.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:11 No.10983397
    in the EU, the engineer was forced to design it against her will. so she included the flaw with the intentions of giving it to the rebels
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:11 No.10983399
    EU is utter shit though.
    >> $taunche 07/07/10(Wed)01:12 No.10983412

    dood watch empire news k
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:13 No.10983423
    This goes way further back, and far deeper, than any of you peons realise. Naboo is behind it ALL. Emperor? From Naboo. Skywalker? Mother was the QUEEN of Naboo at one point.

    Hell, even the Imperial National Anthem is a reworking of a Naboo victory march. Just listen:
    Imperial Anthem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VwkyrTb6go
    Naboo Victory March: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHJBiYvyzWg

    Wake up
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:14 No.10983437
    I've run the simulations. There's no way that X-Wing was responsible for the destruction of the Death Star.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:16 No.10983454
         File1278479778.jpg-(9 KB, 250x208, Mind Blown Calvin.jpg)
    9 KB
    Holy shit. That means...the Empire was never independent. It was just the old Republic/Trade Federation with a new name.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:16 No.10983456
    Actually, the ones who stole the Tusken homeland were humans.

    Or, if you want to be even more technical, it was the Rakata, when they glassed Tatooine from orbit as a punishment for rebellion and turned what had been a fertile world of jungles and seas into a near-lifeless desert hellscape.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:18 No.10983482
         File1278479886.jpg-(9 KB, 217x225, 1264991992292.jpg)
    9 KB

    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:18 No.10983485
    I don't think the Death Star ever exploded. In fact, I don't think it ever existed. I think that the Empire made the whole thing up as an excuse to dissolve the Senate and consolidate power in the hands of the planetary governors.

    I mean, even the alleged footage of the explosions is inconsistent. In the original footage, recorded in AY0, the supposed detonation of the Death Star shows only a single expanding debris and fire cloud. However, in the more modern version of the footage, the explosion is preceded by a vertical annular shock wave.

    Why the inconsistency? It only makes sense if the explosion were somehow faked, and then later redone to be much more convincing.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:20 No.10983519
    >He thinks the Rakata actually existed!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:22 No.10983557
    Look, just because they're no longer Force-sensitive, reduced to barbarism, and trapped on a shithole planet doesn't mean they didn't used to be awesome.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:22 No.10983561
    Seriously, compare the original explosion footage:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmRfj2dF7gM&feature=related at 3:40

    To the version most often seen nowadays


    Why the inconsistency?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:23 No.10983569

    Let me guess, you sit in your upper-middle class Correllian home sipping your Venti Hotcaf while listening to RePublic Radio.

    The only alien you've ever seen with your own eyes is a Selonian and come on, their the least bad of the bunch. Try having a conversation with a Gungan sometime.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:24 No.10983598
    that shit was clearly faked.

    A missile, turning at 90 degrees? What kind of degenerate would believe such a thing?

    What do they take us for?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:24 No.10983599
    You're so wrong. the MG7-A has a small, but effective guidance system, and a CEP of less than 3 meters. That thermal exhaust port was the biggest energy signature for 12 parsecs. You could have dropped a fucking MG7-A out of a Cloakshape and it would have destroyed the DS.

    Seriously, the Imps got all butthurt because all the corporatist buttgrabbing and corner cutting destroyed the centerpiece of Tarkin's plans, and the Ubiqtorate has been planting these conspiracy theories as disinfo.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:25 No.10983612
    Neither of those recordings make any sense. The damn thing evaporates--there's hardly any debris anywhere.

    And that only makes any sense if both recordings were of a mockup "exploding"--a mockup made of fragile materials, designed to leave as little trace as possible, so that no one could come back and verify the cause of its destruction.

    And frankly, no offense to relatives of those lost on the Death Star, but I wouldn't put it past certain members of the Imperial government to kill a few thousand of their own men to keep this farce quiet. Or move them onto a covert position, and report them as dead.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:28 No.10983640
    I'm station on Calamaria. Mon Cal's and Quarren aren't that bad--a bit hard to talk to, but they've got some brains, at least. Unlike Gungans.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:28 No.10983643

    Let me guess, you think Kessel is full of slave mines and political prisoners, right?


    repubtards are so gullible.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:30 No.10983692
    That's what I mean: I don't think there ever WAS a Death Star.

    I mean, think about the amount of money that it took to (allegedly) build this thing. We're talking about the entire GDP of entire star systems rerouted to build a supposed super-weapon. And yet nobody thinks to ask where that money REALLY went.

    I'll tell you this: it didn't go towards making a cheap mockup to blow up and blame the "State of Emergency" on.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:31 No.10983697
    Nope. Frankly, I think Kessel is full of crap. But that's just me.

    And what's so pro-Republic about expecting our leaders to know a good trick when they think of one, and use it? No one ever said Palpatine was dumb.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:31 No.10983703
    Corellia has deserts.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:34 No.10983738

    I've had the misfortune of winding up on Tatooine and I assure you that they don't even compare.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:34 No.10983747
         File1278480896.jpg-(53 KB, 750x461, i-said-what.jpg)
    53 KB
    >>>this thread
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:35 No.10983756
    Am I the only one who thinks that Mon Cal accents are soothing?

    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:36 No.10983775
    >It's impossible, even for a computer!
    --Wedge Antilles, expert pilot and fighter ace
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:36 No.10983784
    They're nice, but they can get kinda obscure at times. Especially when you're in the drive-in lane at the SushiBurger.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:37 No.10983793
    Follow the money; where does it go?

    That's right: spice.

    It's not the Hutt "crime lord syndicates" running the substance. It's our own dear Moffs.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:39 No.10983821
    I'm glad the Empire is gone. The prejudice on us Twi'lek girls was too harsh.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:40 No.10983845
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:41 No.10983856
    Yeah, but that poster was wrong. There's a fairly large amount of desert on Corellia. It's not like a Corellian would get to Tattooine and be all like "derp, sand."

    That said, I knew a couple guys who were in the same cadre as Tagrog. They transferred up and out. Tagrog, well, they say if you don't get your gold pauldron by the time you're 30, you might as well retire and go work for some Hutt.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:41 No.10983860
    oh god, not this shit again.

    there is no sentient life outside our galaxy. And if there is, the Outbound Flight project proved that it's impossible to travel between galaxies.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:44 No.10983902
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:45 No.10983919

    Seriously, a bunch of dreadnoughts filled with Jedi and scientists couldn't find a way out of the galaxy; why the fuck would you think that anyone else could find a way IN?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:45 No.10983920
    Antilles is has absolutely 0 experience with weapon systems. Janson or Celchu, I'd trust, but Antilles, and it kills to say this about a fellow Corellian, is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:46 No.10983928
    >i'm a twi'lek girl on the internet!

    tails or gtfo
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:51 No.10984010
    Look, asshole, I mustered out of the Chandrillan Navy as a PO-2, and I was an SO. That's Starfighter Ordnancebeing. As in, my fucking job was maintaining and troubleshooting things like, derp, MG7-A proton torpedoes. Trust me, a thermal signature like what would have been coming out of that station, and I could *throw* a fucking MG7 and blow the damn thing.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:52 No.10984027
    Thanks for your request.
    It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
    This thread has been requested 1 times now.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:52 No.10984028
    >Follow the money; where does it go?
    Let's follow the trail of political benefit from the first DS's destruction instead.

    Darth Vader is the primary immediate beneficiary. All of his rivals in the military arena went out with the Death Star. His primary controller, Grand Moff Tarkin? Dead. Most of the other Grand Moffs? Dead. The Moff who told Vader off and brought up issues that question Vader's competence? SO. VERY. DEAD.

    Secondary beneficiaries?
    Princess Leia of Alderaan, sister of Luke Skywalker and daughter of Anakin Skywalker. She went from being a member of the Rebel Alliance working as part of the Senate to being the de facto political figurehead for the Rebellion; remember how they just kept milking that "Alderaan was a peaceful planet! We need JUSTICE!" angle? Yeah. Going from minor influence to major figurehead, definitely increasing the Skywalker share of the Rebellion's political power. And her escape from the Death Star, which was planned by none other than Darth "Skywalker" Vader, and executed by Luke Skywalker.

    Then comes Luke Skywalker in third place, becoming a hero to the Rebellion and putting him firmly on the path to being the most influential man in the galaxy should the Empire fall.

    So, you have a Skywalker practically running the Imperial military and leading the hunt for two OTHER Skywalkers who now happen to be pretty much the most important people in the Rebel Alliance, both politically and militarily.

    All because the Death Star, a facility whose security was entrusted to one Skywalker, was destroyed by another Skywalker after the first Skywalker let a THIRD Skywalker escape with the only security breach that COULD harm said facility. And somehow, magically, this left the first Skywalker as the sole survivor of the facility, the second Skywalker as one of two survivors of the attack on the facility, and the third Skywalker as one of a handful of survivors of the facility's attack on her homeworld.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:54 No.10984051
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:55 No.10984058

    So, what you're saying is that amongst other things, there's also people trying to make a Skywalker dynasty? Wouldn't the emperor just flip his shit over that?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:56 No.10984074
    This is the most ridiculous shit I've ever heard. Why would they spend that much money just to go and blow it up?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:56 No.10984078
    >the Chandrillan Navy
    What, did the Alderaanian Hug Patrol tell you you weren't tough enough to join them?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:57 No.10984094

    Betrayal is the way of the Sith.

    ...as is nepotism, apparently.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:58 No.10984103
    Vader wasn't the sole survivor by any means. General Tagge (of, yes, those Tagges) and Colonel (later General) Maximilian Veers were both on the Death Star, but left before the Rebel attack force arrived.

    Personally, as an Imperial Navy vet, I wouldn't put it past those Army motherfuckers to pull something like this.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:58 No.10984105
    Insurance fraud?
    Relatives in the construction industry?
    Union labor leadership friends?
    Pick any one you want.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:58 No.10984113

    But come on, if that was really the case the Palpatine would know it, he isn't exactly retarded, you know?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)01:59 No.10984128
    Better than the 501st Holonet Strike Force, asshole. Freedom isn't free. We learned that lesson during the Clone Wars, and have maintained a strong and ready posture ever since.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:00 No.10984137
    Yeah, sure people.

    Look the Death Star conspiracy is ludicrous and I won't even demolish all of the individual points. That has been done before in publications like Popular Astromechanics.

    Do you honestly think the Empire could pull off the proposed Death Star plot and keep it a secret? That's asking an organization that couldn't conjure up the stolen data tapes, or had clairvoyance enough to find the rebels' hidden fortress to work properly.

    Next you'll be proposing that the new Death Star is fully armed and operational while only pretending to be under construction. How naive do you think I am? Do I look Bothan to you?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:00 No.10984142
    I dont see the problem. At least Vader would do more than sit on his mysterious-robeclad-ass and give power to incompetent Moffs like the Emperor does.

    Fucking Tarkin should never have gotten power, Thrawn wouldnt have staked so much on the DS, and all those poor patriots wouldnt have died.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:01 No.10984149

    If that isn't the case it means that Vader is either highly incompetent (likely, considering how he throws temper tantrums and kills random officers, or so I've heard) or he's got too many issues to be given the task of taking care of the Skywalker kids.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:02 No.10984167
    >"Join me, and we can rule the galaxy as father and son and put an end to this destructive conflict! The Emperor has foreseen it."
    --Republic Holovid re-enactment of events on Bespin's Cloud City mining complex
    Yeah, no, Vader was practically PUBLIC about his intention to supplant the Emperor and found his own dynasty.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:02 No.10984172
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:03 No.10984176

    Tagge survived?
    hmmm...how convenient.
    >> GODDAMNIT 07/07/10(Wed)02:03 No.10984186
    No. Fuck you NO. I am never talking to those goddamned annoying ass frog people ever again. Fuck Naboo, Fuck their shitty little yellow starfleet, and Fuck you for even reminding me they exist.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:03 No.10984192
    Not retarded? You're just a Jedi/Sith apologists. Those batshit religious fanatics think that because they were involved in starting the conflict they should qualify as "leadership" material. Here's a short list of the shortcomings of our dear "Emperor":
    - hired a batshit kid out of a burn ward to run his secret police
    - had rank-and-file personnel running multiple sections of the Death Star without so much as color-coordinated outfits, which made it all too easy for infiltrators
    - state security in encrypted passcodes? Please. Ewoks could get past that radio check.
    - Ewoks. C'mon. Best of the Imperial army, defeated by fuzzy toys? Pathetic.
    - safety violations, safety violations everywhere. See any railings around those open pits into the reactor core? I've seen hedgerows on what's left of Alderaan with higher barriers

    Other than that, he did not take into consideration the damage a group of armed guerilla warfare experts could inflict on his off-site shield array. That's just bad planning.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:04 No.10984199

    So...why does the emperor do nothing again?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:04 No.10984204
    >You'll have so many Skywalkers

    >800 Skywalker

    While I do see the logic behind that (and it is pretty damn compelling) the way it was put together makes my head spin worse than listening to a gungan try to parse its way through galactic basic. Frickken skywalkers all over the damn place.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:04 No.10984205
    This kids, is why you stay off drugs.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:05 No.10984206
    >Republic holovid reenactment
    >Legitimate source

    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:05 No.10984215

    Go be Emperor then; when you do come back and tell me how easy it is for an idiot to get to that position.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:07 No.10984226
    Ever wonder what the empire has in those little mousedroids? They're far too big to JUST lead people around imperial facilities and carry messages.

    There's gotta be a reason why they're designed to slag their innards if you try to dismantle them

    fuckin' deathsticks, man
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:07 No.10984231

    >nerf herder.



    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:07 No.10984238
    TaggoCo keeps glitterstim illegal to protect it's profits.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:08 No.10984242

    Its because too many damn Gungans and Toydarians were stealing em when they first came out.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:08 No.10984244
    Whatever, nerf herder.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:08 No.10984253
    Emperor? Pfft. That's an old Sith joke, at best. I'm a Republic man, to the core, but .. nah, man. Nah.

    You want a hard job? I worked on Admiral Motti's personal staff and my boss got choked to death by one of those batshit wizards. Now, I'm working on an evaporator farm and part-time bartending in Mos Eisley. There's a hard job.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:09 No.10984265
    >I glance at the thread and find OP's pic oddly touching.
    >Then I read 800 skywalkers
    >Suddenly; Jedi/Sith apologists

    Never change, /tg/.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:09 No.10984266

    Oh its on now maintenance droid. Its. On. Now.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:09 No.10984267
    God I love /tg/
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:10 No.10984276
    Low bid contracts. TaggeCo again.

    Look at the connections, man!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:10 No.10984292

    You know, that's pretty much a job for crazies, and people who aren't crazy but are still pretty uh...slow.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:11 No.10984298
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:11 No.10984301
    Hey, hey, hey. Relax. Have a Kessel Run's worth of patience with that Gungan swine. They're born that way.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:11 No.10984309
    Try it. My uncle's a bounty hunter and he'll kick your ass.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:12 No.10984311
    Fucking kids keep ruining our discussions.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:12 No.10984326

    My uncle is a rancor.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:13 No.10984335
    Crazy is some suited-up cyborg/burn ward refugee choking the shit out of your boss while you watch, still holding his HotCaf. Nearly wet myself, to be honest, but that ... not cool, man. Not cool.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:13 No.10984337

    You don't forgive 200 years of repression against the nerf herders of the republic.

    The only thing great about the Empire so far is equal rights for nerf herders.

    Its about time we got SOME recompense for the years of suffering.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:13 No.10984338
    my uncle is marka ragnos
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:14 No.10984350
    Watch out for those gates, sailor. Getcha every time.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:14 No.10984359

    Your mother is a Gungan.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:15 No.10984371
    My parents are travelling jewish mechanics.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:15 No.10984373
    It's always summer on at least one planet.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:16 No.10984376

    Well EXCUSE me for being a nerf herder that worked his way through the Carida Academy.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:17 No.10984396
         File1278483457.jpg-(477 KB, 1024x768, femtroopers.jpg)
    477 KB

    Jawas are five points apiece in target practice.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:17 No.10984400
    Affirmative Action.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:17 No.10984402

    What happens when its not summer on any planet?
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:18 No.10984411
    What the average Imperial citizen doesn't seem to grasp, is that we're everywhere.

    In the years since the emancipation for nerf herders we've gotten everywhere.

    The sector grand moff? 1/4 Nerf Herder.

    That crime lord? 1/2 Nerf herder.

    And we all KNOW each other.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:19 No.10984419

    We're perfectly aware that your kind are the reason the galaxy sucks so much right now, thankyouverymuch.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:19 No.10984420

    How cute, he's trying to make himself sound important.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:19 No.10984423
    Can we talk about something else that's been bothering me? Why did Seinar cancel the TIE Advanced X1 program?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:20 No.10984428
    And my hard-earned credits at work.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:21 No.10984441
         File1278483664.jpg-(44 KB, 288x335, jawa holocaust.jpg)
    44 KB
    Jawas had their own Holocaust.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:21 No.10984443
    Peace on the Holonet.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:22 No.10984451

    Because people are cheaper, apparently.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:22 No.10984456
    >>Can we talk about something else that's been bothering me? Why did Seinar cancel the TIE Advanced X1 program?

    It wasn't necessary. What was the Rebellion's top line starfighter? The X-Wing? Seriously a T-65? The Y-Wing was an old reliable, emphasis on OLD. The new shit was shit. I mean the B-Wing? The gyros on that bitch made it a total hanger queen and a jumped-up gunboat is not exactly going to bring the Empire to its knees.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:22 No.10984458

    Honestly? Politics.

    Word around the academy some grand moff tied up the project because he was getting kick backs for parts and replacement craft for the old TIEs.

    Sucks huh?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:23 No.10984478
    But we're sacrificing out space superiority! I know the Avenger variant is supposed to be the replacement for that program, but it doesn't fucking compare! What was high command thinking?!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:24 No.10984487
    That's not funny, m grandfather died in the holocaust.

    He was drunk and fell out of a watchtower.

    Nevar forgit.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:24 No.10984494

    My god, has the propaganda machine gotten EVERYBODY?! OF COURSE the Empire used to be the republic! Documents from the republic era show that Jedi were used as peacekeepers (read: secret police) until their attempted coup during the clone wars.

    I'm frankly appalled that you believe in this "skywalker heritage" nonsense. Tatooine has no birth records; anybody supposedly born there could easily not even exist. Not only that, we have no solid evidence supporting Luke and Leia's relation aside from genetic tests that THEY THEMSELVES financed. And their relationship to Vader is in question too. These "genetic tests" are just Luke Skywalker and Leia Solo trying to legitimize their rule over the New Republic by claiming descent from its most famous general. GET THE WOOL OUT OF YOUR EYES, SHEEPLE!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:24 No.10984497
    Shit, man. Same thing happen to the Tie Defender I heard rumors about? I don't even know if it left production, but that thing was supposed to out-fly and out-gun god, if it ever got made.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:24 No.10984500
    Did he land on a Jawa?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:25 No.10984507
    What about the A-wing? Dodonna designing a front-line strike fighter? We're fucked.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:26 No.10984511
    if we want to talk trainwrecks.


    what the FUCK.

    who thought slapping a tie-fighter body between a pair of ridiculously large, vulnerable, and outdated tracks would be a good idea?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:26 No.10984513
    I bet so. Little buggers couldn't break a butterfly's fall.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:26 No.10984519
    The only suitable terrain they could be used on?
    I smell cover-up.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:28 No.10984539
    They make great cover WHEN THEY INEVITABLY BREAK DOWN.

    Maybe ImpSurForCom does like us grunts after all?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:28 No.10984545
    Actually, I hear he had a degree in starship engineering and design.

    Then again, I hear that someof them were assembled with WOOD, so...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:29 No.10984547
    Y'know...back when I was navigator on a freighter, running Tibanna from Bespin to Tepasi, there were a couple of Nerf Herders on the crew.
    I never gave them a second thought (they were cargo haulers, I was flight crew. We hardly even crossed paths) until that meteorite took out our lateral stabilizers while we were too close to the atmosphere of some backwater planet in the Mid-Rim.
    One of those Nerf Herders (fuck I wish I could remember his name) dragged me from the wreckage despite his own wounds.
    Dammit...what the fuck was his name...?
    Well, anyways...Nerf Herders are all right in my book.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:31 No.10984576

    Dude, tell me about it.

    Last I heard Lord Vader got his asthma laced hands on all the protoypes and gave them to a few 'chosen'.

    God, as if those red armored fags on Coruscant weren't big enough ass holes.

    'Oh, look, we got the only 12 ships in the galaxy that can outgun a cruiser without breaking a sweat'

    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:31 No.10984577
    Interior paneling only. Cardooinians, man, what can you do? Motherfuckers believe in doing shit in STYLE.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:31 No.10984578
    >>What about the A-wing? Dodonna designing a front-line strike fighter? We're fucked.

    Give Dodonna an unlimited budget and another five prototypes and we are fucked. The A-Wing is just an up-engined T-65 without the payload as is. As a test platform it was impressive, but the Rebels don't have the R&D budget to follow through.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:31 No.10984587
    They should never have discontinued the Eta-2 Actis.

    Beautiful fighter, and so small too!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:31 No.10984591
    Motti's former assistant, now bartender on Tatooine here.
    Dude - half of my best customers are Nerf Herders. When I'm working, nobody gets to use 'their word' without a strong warning and an 86'ing follow-up.
    >> An0nymous !gkWeiOwuW2 07/07/10(Wed)02:32 No.10984595

    The worst part? They take AT-AT washouts and stuff them in there.

    Where is the justice.

    You should hear them in the cantina sometimes. Its sad really.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:32 No.10984598

    Fuck yeah it was. They guy who graduated at the top of my flight school fly one, with Vader himself as his wingman. He said they performed EXACTLY like all the rumors said they would. But he is the only one I know who has flown one and the dude was crazy good, he went from flight officer to colonel in less than three years.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:32 No.10984599


    You misspelled jawa, bro.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:33 No.10984611
    Probably a loose wire in his protocol droid's translation circuit. Just thwack it a few times with a hammer.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:33 No.10984612
    Bitches don't know about my skipray blastboat.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:34 No.10984633
    And the bitches probably are happy about that, too. Skipray boats are right up there with Tusken Raider plastic surgeons; sure, the job is technically done, but damn, its all kinds of ugly.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:35 No.10984646
    Tell me about it. It's a pity nobody would buy any after the whole Jedi Rebellion thing during the formation of the Empire. Who wants to fly the primary fighter of choice of the traitors?

    I do, damnit.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:36 No.10984652
    Hey, with unemployment like it is in the Mid-Rim, they can't just demob them, you know?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:36 No.10984657
    I hear they have buggy targeting software. Real deal or more Gungan gibbering?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:37 No.10984673
    Gungan gibbering. I own one myself.

    The real problem is finding somewhere to park your hyperdrive ring these days. I lost two of the three this thing came with due to smugglers running straight through the few remaining parking areas.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:38 No.10984684
    Bay six, Mos Eisley. "Friendly" mechanic who knows some Hutts who know some Hutts. Just sayin'.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:40 No.10984704

    Those things are a fucking nuisance.
    I've smashed through two and barely missed another while trying to get through some empty space to unload my spi-...uhh...cargo.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:40 No.10984705
    CorSec bought a few, and I know a couple of the richer Inner Rim planets and the CSA picked up some.

    But, yeah. I know in CorSec's case, someone in procurement's brother knew a guy at Incom, and that's why they switched to the T-65. You know how it goes on Corellia.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:41 No.10984709
    You know, according to the Rebel's reports of the conflict at Endor, they took out the SSD Executor with strike craft.

    Strike craft. An INTERCEPTOR.

    Now, while that sinks in, you also should realize that there are multiple recorded instances of a single squad of rebel strikecraft destroying entire convoys, capital ships, or worse.

    Quite frankly, what is the purpose of the massive cruisers and star destroyers both sides put out? Fighters seem vastly more efficient, all things considered.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:42 No.10984726

    >Implying those reports aren't 90% fabrication.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:43 No.10984731
    your full of shit, how could they take out the executor
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:43 No.10984738
    The Rebels say a lot of things. You know what they don't have? Space control.

    You want to shoot up unarmed convoys and maybe score a lucky hit on a thermo-couple and get some propaganda footage? Buy snub-fighters. Want to run a galactic government? Invest in capital ships.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:44 No.10984748
    Having worked on more than a few of those bulky chaff piles, I'd have to say its the impressive show of force that most of the jackasses in uniform get off on. Huge, empty corridors, gigantic drops into almost-pointless air shafts and these *huuuuuuge* grates over everything. The floor? Good luck finding more than fifty feet worth mopping, what with the carbosteel people so in bed with the designers of the average cruiser, they're practically Corellian cousins.

    Oh, the things I could say about my *brief* tenure on the Death Star, as well...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:46 No.10984765
    WHY? If the spent the cost of a SD on a decent multi-role and hyper-capable fighter, (Like, though I hate to admit it, Incom's T-65,), they'd probably have a lot more coverage, power, survivability, and fewer total crew. Seriously.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:46 No.10984768
    It's a seismic shift in military doctrine, that's for sure. During the Clone Wars, the Republic's doctrine (from which both current Imperial and, for the most part, Rebel doctrine is descended from) shfited from small forces supported by Jedi and local levies to large forces of capital ships crewed by professional officers. Now, we're seeing the rise of a current based on small groups of strike craft. It'll be interesting. The rise of the Nebulon-B, Lancer, and Carrack classes shows that COMIMPSPAFOR is taking it seriously, though.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:47 No.10984772
    No shit. Who did you think the Bothans worked for?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:48 No.10984791
         File1278485293.jpg-(228 KB, 1900x815, Venator_bridge.jpg)
    228 KB

    And just look at the steerage pits they shove the bridge crews into while the captain and his band of ass-kissers strut around staring out windows into empty space.

    It's enough to make you want to sign on with the Rebs.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:48 No.10984794
    Downtime. A snub-fioghter needs hours in the hangar being maintained by an astromech droid for every hour in flight. A capital ship has 24/7 endurance on station at a fraction of the support cost.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:49 No.10984802
    Hey, I was there man, I was there! You don't even know! That fucking Skywalker, he was fucking inhuman, fucking danced through fields of fire untouched, I didn't chase him because nobody could touch him.
    Three hundred sixty-eight of my friends died on that fucking Death Star defending you from those fucking Rebels. Don't you ever tell me it was a hoax.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:49 No.10984806
    Glass jaw, man, glass jaw.

    You'd think in a ship that size, they'd store the ordnance far away from the bridge, which would also be far away from the main reactors. Nope. gotta have them big launchbays. The main magazine was right under the bridge, and blew out the main engines, pushing it into the DS.

    It looks baffling as shit, seeing it crash like that, until you talk to a competent (i.e. non-KDY) astroengineer.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:49 No.10984809
    I might just be a bartender, fella, but that's pretty close to treason. Then again, we're also being governed by the "friends of the Ewoks and Jawas", so fuck, treason it up, my Nerf Herder.
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)02:50 No.10984819

    You understand nothing of the logistics of fleet combat!

    Can a snubfighter carry an army to a planet?
    Can a snubfighter pilot spend 40 hours sitting in the cockpit while in hyperspace and fight effectively when they reach their destination?

    Wake up repubtards, combined arms spacewarfare is where it is it. A balanced force. Capital ships supported by medium cruisers, anti-fighter picket ships, and it's own contingent of fighters.

    A small imperial patrol fleet does what squadrons and squadrons of fighters can never do it. It projects power and stability.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:50 No.10984832
    >I was there when Skywalker was there!
    >still alive
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:51 No.10984837
    well, that explains why pretty much every SSD captain i've met is batshit loco. closwe the goddamn blast shields when punching the hyperdrive. hyperspace contains things no mortal man is meant to see.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:51 No.10984838
    You know what always bugs me?

    It's when people dismiss stuff like this as a "conspiracy theory" when the commonly accepted explanation is a theory about a conspiracy.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:51 No.10984846
    Another one of you Gungans, huh? Damn, will you never learn...? That kind of thinking is what fueled the fire for the first Costly Star, before some ignorant redneck from a desert shitplanet blew it up.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:53 No.10984857
    alot of the stuff going on in this thread is treasonous bullshit. Also, I really hope they smash these terrorist to space dust...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:53 No.10984859
    God, what is WITH KDY? Anyone remember the last time they made a good ship? Prior to the Clone Wars, I think. Might be prior to the Republic, I'm no† sure.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:54 No.10984870
    KDY was never good.
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)02:54 No.10984884
         File1278485690.jpg-(64 KB, 416x467, Thrawn.jpg)
    64 KB

    The beaurocrats behind the DS got what they deserved.

    The whole "quantity over quality" doctrine.

    You expect waves of conscripted pilots in expendable TIE/n Fighters to stand up against motivated terrorists in the superior X-Wing and A-wing platforms?

    No, the future lies in solid leadership, and a focus on trained pilots flying the hardware our soldiers deserve, the Tie Advanced and Tie Defender.

    And more Commanders we can believe in.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:54 No.10984885
    >Can a snubfighter pilot spend 40 hours sitting in the cockpit while in hyperspace and fight effectively when they reach their destination?

    This is actually the one advantage the Y-wing has over the X-wing. Roomier cockpit, especially in the 1-man and astromech configuration. You can pee in something other than a diaper and sleep in an almost human position.

    The two man config, though? Don't even try it. As cramped as an X-wing, plus another dude's ballsweat (and my SIO was a Sullustan. Nice guy, and you won't catch me saying a bad thing Sullustan humor or cooking, but coming from a volcanic world means that you sweat basically pure fucking sulfur). Feels bad man.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:56 No.10984900
    Test them before they take command.
    If they're Force-positive, kick 'em to the curb.
    Look at the last time we relied on them.

    I'd join back up, if they kept the religious zealots out of command.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:56 No.10984904
    Now I want a HOPE poster of Thrawn... yet I lack the requisite skillz.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:57 No.10984920
    Oh great, now the Huttese Anti-defamation League is going to bust in here and start waving cease & desist orders around.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:58 No.10984931
    what does a Y-Wing do
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:58 No.10984935
    I was in space, you fucking dianoga-for-brains.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:59 No.10984943

    Look, if you remove Force-sensitives from all positions of power, you basically took every single important human out of the galaxy.

    And there are an assload of humans who'd rather follow a Force-sensitive human than a reasonable nonhuman. It's crazy, I know, I'm a human and I'd rather go hang out with tentacled blobs of protoplasm if it meant I could stay the fuck away from anyone who talks to bacteria before making any life-altering decisions, but that's just the way things work.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)02:59 No.10984952
    The y-wing is a fighter-bomber shipwith a 2man crew. slow as fuck and handles like a hutt on an oil slick, but damn if it hasn't got an awesome payload.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:00 No.10984956
    Takes a shitton more damage than either an X-Wing or a TIE/ln. Seriously. They're slow. They're showing their age. But I have seen a Y-wing blunder into a turbolaser blast and fly home under its own power.
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)03:00 No.10984957
         File1278486009.jpg-(93 KB, 416x405, Advice-Thrawn--BE-THE-ONLY-SUC(...).jpg)
    93 KB

    If Thrawn had never been killed by the treacherous Noghri(to be fair, he was playing with fire), and managed to end the Rebellion...I try not to think too hard on what would could have been.

    A galactic empire free of Xenophobia, idiocy of force using leaders, with stable and sane leadership.

    And the Vong would have been stopped cold upon arrival, instead of rampaging through the galaxy killing trillions and destroying hundreds of worlds...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:00 No.10984964
    Vong? Who're they?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:01 No.10984974
    That ancient religion of crazy old wizards is almsot dead anyway.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:01 No.10984975
    one thing I want to know. why does the empire bother letting the Hutt empire stay? the empire needs to expand
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:01 No.10984978

    Space Chinese.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:02 No.10984985

    >implying you saw a snubfighter survive anything other than a near miss by a turbolaser
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:02 No.10984986
    just a myth being spread around by some whack job ignore him
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:02 No.10984990
         File1278486150.jpg-(65 KB, 500x752, obama-hope.jpg)
    65 KB
    It's like they were made for him...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:03 No.10984995
    Old, old treaties, man. You don't just abrogate that shit - the Huttese economy is way to closely tied to the economy of the Empire as a whole.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:03 No.10984996
    Crime will always exist, but in the hands of the Hutts it is much less sloppy than any other group of "Legitimate Businesspeople." Of course, you might draw correlations between bumper years for spice running and Imperial officials suddenly being able to afford new houses, but that would make you a cynic.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:04 No.10985007
    Missed the cockpit, sure, and it limped the fuck in on one engine, but I swear to space, man, it was a square hit on the rear starboard quarter.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:05 No.10985021
    Also, a desire to keep Corellia weak by supporting the competition.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:07 No.10985034
    Bullshit. I've seen near misses sear the fucking plating off frigates - no way a fighter could take a hit.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:07 No.10985041
    oh sure, everyone's heard THAT one. that's up there with the X-Wing that managed to land on a planet with only one of it's four wings still attached and the astrodroid fried
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:08 No.10985061
    Corellia's criminal organizations are young, relative to the Hutt cartels. The Hutts will screw eachother over, but you don't see their wars spilling over into caf stores or civil transit arteries.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:08 No.10985064
    I can't vouch for the guy who posted this, but talk to any Y-wing pilot. Those guys at Koensayr knew their shit.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:09 No.10985073
    Funniest thing is that the 'league makes hutts look weak. Bunch of morons that started it up. I was one of Jabbas personal guards (Gamorrean pride!) and he fucking despised the league. Hutts need fear, both psychologically, and literally, Hutt operations runs on the emotion. Despite all the deadly bounty-hunters and assassins, very very few Hutts die to non-hutts. Because every fucking one is afraid that some other Hutt will put out a hit on them. And, to be fair, they're right. If people tried, hutts would be fucked.

    Also fuck that Skywalker guy, he killed Jabba and I've been forced to work with some fucking lizard-head crime boss until one of Jabba''s cousins finally realizes that Jabba is actually dead and I'm not a assassination attempt. Like Jabba would do that, he was a smart fucker, even if he was really arrogant. He would know that one of his senior guards would be recognizable. Still, I hope the stupid fucking relative calms down soon and hires me, no one pays like a hutt. Course one has to be careful to not annoy him, but I'm pretty decent at that, after, I live still.

    As for how I got away, well lets just say that I've been in the business a while and knew to keep a little speeder bike hidden away. Didnt get me far before breaking though, but some Jawas picked me up. They can be quite friendly to armed non-droids.

    ps Bob Fett is a little wuss, he got taken out in moments.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:11 No.10985089
    but those were Old Republic treaties. why should the Empire honor treaties signed thousands of years ago. we could easily assimlate them and take their shit for themselves
    less sloppy? In the hands of those kriffing worms, I need more convincing then that my good man
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:12 No.10985102
    And yeah, hutts are the best criminals out there, par none.

    Well they kinda depopulate the dancing industry sometimes, but hey, who cares?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:13 No.10985112

    I gotta say, you're very articulate for a Gamorrean.
    Please don't take this the wrong way if I'm wrong, but I kinda find it hard to believe.
    Could just be my own latent xenophobia from being raised as an Imperial...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:14 No.10985122
    I know a crazy guy who modified the shit out of his Actis. He removed the ring part of the hyperdrive ring and permanently attached it to the fighter and now has two massive nacelles on the front of the thing. Looks surprisingly cool, just a pity he had to strip out the blasters.

    Last I heard he was in the market for the wingtip blaster of an X-Wing to mount underneath the thing.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:14 No.10985130
    >Gamorrean pride!
    This one phrase explains everything else about your post.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:15 No.10985133
    Here's the thing (and this has been done before) the second the Hutts are at risk from high up, they suddenly reveal a bunch of rebel bases and sudden cash donations.

    Hutts are smart.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:15 No.10985140
    Bullshit. My ex-girlfriend was a Twilek entertainer on that barge. It was Luke's sister, not Luke. Typical Gamorrean - you guys need glasses!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:15 No.10985141
    sorry I meant to say "take their shit for ourselves"
    I rage whenever think of the hutts
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:16 No.10985155
    Cybernetic enhancements my friend are a wonderful thing.

    And you shut the hell up, we are excellent guards, and a hell of a lot more articulate then the damn wookies.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:17 No.10985162
    Speaking of batshit insane fighter modders, there's a guy here in Anchorhead on Tatooine who's been scavenging old vulture droid parts for the last 10 years. Crazy fucker's trying to build a humanoid starfighter with working arms and legs.

    It'll never work.
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)03:17 No.10985163

    people who fly uglies makes me sick. Sure I don't get to fly Defenders anymore and am stuck to a command chair of a VSD, I still think back to my days in the first of the Defender squadrons...

    Oh man, one day early in the first test sorties, we came upon some pirates flying mishmashed uglies made from from Tie, Y-Wing, and Z-95 spare parts...lets just say "leave no survivors" was quite easy against that junk.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:18 No.10985173
    >Thanks for your request.
    It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
    This thread has been requested 2 times now.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:18 No.10985176
    Odd, I remember her being eaten. Eh, I never pay attention to the entertainment, jsut leads to tears.

    And while she did the deed indeed, Luke was the one to get her in a position where none of us could help.

    But in the end, fuck Skywalkers in general.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:20 No.10985194
    Don't get me wrong, it's no ugly. The guy put a lot of work into making it look like the thing was designed that way. Replaced most of the hull plating to get rid of the seams and everything.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:20 No.10985199
    I...can't argue with that logic. I DO hate the rebels more then I hate the hutts, what the brix are they thinking, trying to destroy every good thing the Empire stands for?
    >HERP DERP, the empire is corrupt

    oh yeah? I could say the same about the Old Republic
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:20 No.10985201
         File1278487256.jpg-(35 KB, 559x587, jo-hyun-young-tongue.jpg)
    35 KB
    Who knew you could lob a grenade at the chimney to kill the space nazis cooking mashmallows in the fireplace?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:21 No.10985205

    The Empire needs the Hutts way more than the Hutts need the Empire.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:21 No.10985208
    It's sad, really. Their language centers are about like human's, but their vocal apparatus is so, so (forgive me, dude) primitive.

    There are actually several very well regarded Garmorrean novelists. I read an interview with one, Voort saBinring, in The Coursacanti the other week.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:21 No.10985212
    If the Rebels put a lot of stock in tough ships and independent hyperdrives, it's because they know they can't trust their friends to pick them up.

    TIEs may not be heavily shielded or armored, but they have amazing pilot survivability. Just look at those flight suits!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:22 No.10985217

    [ok, how do i archive thread?]
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:23 No.10985228
    Definitely. Hutts were here LONG before the empire, or the republic for that matter. They are too good at what they do, and too good at being useful when that isnt enough.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:23 No.10985233
    It's mostly tactics, really. The insurgents use hit-and-run tactics, and its hard to use those when you have to spend 10 minutes launching your fighters after you drop out of hyperspace, and then another 20 loading them up before you leave.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:23 No.10985234

    You seem like you know a bit about the inner workings of Hutts...
    I'm in the market for a Twi'lek entertainer or two. My crew's been getting restless on those long jumps...
    Who should I try to contact for the best deal (I'm looking for experience, but not TOO MUCH experience, if you catch my meaning)?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:24 No.10985236
         File1278487443.jpg-(38 KB, 555x542, Tie_Fighters.jpg)
    38 KB
    I don't give a motherfuck what those X-wing slinging faggots say, the Tie Fighter is still the sexiest thing to leave an ion trail.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:25 No.10985251
         File1278487511.jpg-(53 KB, 600x750, 633626215017994774-Jawas.jpg)
    53 KB
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:25 No.10985254

    Jabba had replacements coming in every week. Probably he had 5 or 6 twi'lek girls on standby in case he ever got bored of one. Dude was sick, like all hutts.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:25 No.10985259
    You want Talanda T'il, not Hutts. It's an easy mistake to make, since the work so closely. But trust me, one of those former cult girls...nom.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:26 No.10985264
    they are truly disgusting villains
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:26 No.10985265
    >The insurgents use hit-and-run tactics, and its hard to use those when you give a shit about leaving your friends behind to die or worse.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:26 No.10985271
    Uh, by the way, question for the starship experts. I've always thought of using all the credits I've stowed away over the years to buy a big freighter and get a bunch of my old family from Gamorr and go about the galaxy hiring our services out as mercenaries, what sort of ship would you suggest for that?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:28 No.10985277
    Not friends. Recruitment. The Imperial Navy processes ~7,000,000 recruits a year on Caridia alone. The Rebel's can't hope to match that.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:28 No.10985282
    If the Navy just left behind its fighters whenever the rebs jumped away, wouldn't they catch them with their larger drives and jack their shit with turbolasers? The Imperium doesn't leave men behind, the continued existence of the Rebels, and their constant exploitation of that honest, Imperial sense of honor and camaraderie, is proof enough of that.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:28 No.10985283
    Any of the CEC's Action series (I like the IV, personally) bulk freighters would do nicely. How big a family are we talking, though.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:29 No.10985284
    Oddly enough, this isnt really a hutt thing so much. They like to stay a bit back from that. Just look up any slaver and he'll know a guy. Or enslave you. Bring a gun.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:29 No.10985286
    Gotta ask though man, how many washouts?
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)03:29 No.10985297

    Depends on so many factors? Are you looking to buy new or used? How many passengers? Is this going to be your mobile staging area? Armed or unarmed?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:30 No.10985298

    One of my sister's friends is a twi'lek. She's brilliant at starship design and wrote some bestselling novels on the homeworld, but since moving to coruscant she hasn't been able to do anything but dance at clubs.
    Twi'lek discrimination has been overlooked in galactic society for too long.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:30 No.10985300
    Do NOT get a YT-1300. Just because the Millenium Falcon is one of the fastest hardiest ships out there (and has been through several dozen owners' hands), doesn't mean they're all like that. It's been modified out the goddamn WAZOO. It had to have been since it's been flying since the Old Republic days.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:30 No.10985302
         File1278487832.jpg-(29 KB, 400x300, executor.jpg)
    29 KB
    How big is your family?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:31 No.10985311
    Apparently even washouts get a spot somewhere nowadays. You think it takes top class to turn knobs on a Victory's cooling unit?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:31 No.10985313

    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:31 No.10985314
    I think I could get most of the boars in my clan to go, they've been bored as fuck since some peacekeeping stormtroopers stopped the local conflicts.

    So about 20 Gamorreans. Plus a Gamorrean cook or two.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985327
    Not nearly enough, if you ask me.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985329

    Depends on the amount of passengers you need to haul, but my motto is "Go where the Action is". I.e. an Action VI.
    Not much room for passengers stock, but easily modified (damn those Corellians know how to make ships) and only takes a relatively small crew for a ship of its size.
    Plus you can practically haul an asteroid field in it (even after modding for passengers).
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985331
    Either, 25 Gamorreans, yes, armed is best
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985340
    >a Gamorrean cook or two.
    I hear you people are wonderful with applesauce.
    >> $taunche 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985342
    Say whatever you want about the rebs, I'm just glad that Xizor fuck isn't kicking around anymore. That guy was a few flashing lights short of an astromech.

    If the death star really was a cover-up, though, it wouldn't be the first time it's happened. Remember those Trooper droid things Someone mentioned on the holocast from Kashyyk awhile ago? I wonder why nothing came of them?
    >> Guybrarian 07/07/10(Wed)03:32 No.10985343

    Though to be fair, the YT series in general is wonderfully modifiable.
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)03:33 No.10985347

    That's one of the things I regret about the loss of Thrawn. Military minded, but he would of kept the Navy/Army volunteer only, and if ever manpower was needed, well there were rumors of entire squads and old Dreadnaughts crewed entirely by handpicked clones.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:34 No.10985360
    >Just because the Millenium Falcon is one of the fastest hardiest ships out there
    The what?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:34 No.10985363
    Action IV might be a bit small. Try a GR-75, you can get those cheap anymore.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:34 No.10985367
    I wouldnt touch one of those, I've seen Han's (back when he dealt with Jabba more friendly like), and the corridors are way too small to fit Gamorreans comfortably.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:35 No.10985372

    If they keep blowing up your trillion-credit, planet deatroying penis replacements, 7 million a year won't be enough.

    You could build 20 Star Destroyers for the price of one of those things.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:35 No.10985381
    War is hell. You hear about the stormtroopers they picked up off of Endor six years after the war ended?
    Fucking fuck, dude. They don't make 'em like the 501st anymore.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:35 No.10985382
    good GOD, tell me about it. You have no IDEA how many junked YT-1300's i get dropped of here (i run a junkyard on Dantooine) because some trust-fund kid wanted one and then wrecked it pulling some stupid shit that you shouldn't even try in a snub fighter.

    A good tenth of the entire production run have fallen into black holes in The Maw too, because of dumb kids thinking all 1300's go as fast as the falcon
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:36 No.10985387
    name of one of the ships the rebels employed.

    BTW can anyone confirm this:
    there are some rumors that it was there when the death star was destroyed.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:36 No.10985392
    Rebel propaganda ship. I hear they have like 5 of them.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:38 No.10985412
    Keep telling yourself that. I owned the Falcon at one point. She's a swift little thing, but a real hangar queen. Felt good getting her off my hands, even if she's now running for the rebels.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:39 No.10985426

    No fucking way you owned the Falcon. Pics or it didn't happen.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:39 No.10985431
    You laugh, but there's a lovely little Garmorrean bistro on Ord Mantell. Best fucking bepps I've ever had. It's by the Golden Savripp Bar.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:40 No.10985434
    A refitted GR-75 seems quite nice, put some weapons and a bit more shielding on, and it would be very nice indeed.

    Thanks a bunch guys, now all I need to do is find a decent name for us that doesnt sound idiotic in Gamorrean.

    And fuck jabba's cousin.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:40 No.10985440

    Let me guess, you lost it in a card game?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:40 No.10985441

    Yeah yeah yeah...anybody can claim they owned it.
    Hell, I sold the Empire the Chimaera (DERP).
    Pics or it didn't happen, buddy.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:41 No.10985465
    Yeah, Gamorrean food is fantastic, though I am a bit non-partial. Still, I find it weird that people retch at the thought, sure some of us arent all that bright but we have tastebuds just like everyone else. And you would be shocked how upset an old boar gets over bad food.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:42 No.10985472
    yeah right and I found the outbound flight
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:43 No.10985485
    pfft, hell no. sold her for a profit, and bought a replacement. feels good man.

    here you go. i sure hope your computers can support 20-year-old holoimage formats, though!
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:44 No.10985498

    Hmm...either you're on the level, or that's a DAMN good Holo-shoop.
    So...how'd she fly back in those days?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:44 No.10985499
    And, of course, the reason it looks *nothing* like the Falcon is because subsequent owners modified her beyond recognition?

    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:45 No.10985505
    You know, why did the Empire switch away from clones anyway? Perfect, well trained incredibly disipline soldiers with no chance of any being rebels or rebel sympathizers. I've heard something about Kamino being untrustworthy, but surely the empire had their own facilities by then?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:46 No.10985517
    Wasn't this thread about Death Star conspiracy nuttery? How'd it end up turing into a Corellian smugglers circle-jerk?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:46 No.10985520
    Because people keep fuckin'. Seriously, even during the "Clone Wars," system forces did the bulk of the fighting, not the clones.
    >> Exalted !OOirDpvrkA 07/07/10(Wed)03:47 No.10985527
    Anyone who says that the Empire would have beaten the Vong is kidding themselves. The superweapons were way too unwieldy and badly overpriced, and were best for blowing up the galaxy's own planets; moreover, if there were any surviving Rebels from the Alliance, they'd probably restart their war as soon as the Vong showed up. And then, once the Empire fell, there wouldn't be anyone left.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:47 No.10985531

    I think it had something to do with health of the clones...
    Damn shame, too. Those guys were alright. Just took some getting used to being around a bunch of the same guy.
    >> the cheesburger flies high over the night !!yXK3nig2soW 07/07/10(Wed)03:47 No.10985536
    This thread has been requested 5 times now.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:48 No.10985540
    >implying you've ever seen the falcon up close
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:48 No.10985548
    Guys, you won't believe this.

    This crazy old homeless guy gave me a LIGHTSABER. And when I say crazy, he is completely cracked. He tried to talk me into putting on a blindfold and swinging it around, as if they weren't dangerous enough when you can see what you're doing with them!

    I've been cutting random shit in half all morning. I swear, you don't even feel a tug as it goes through ANYTHING. It's the most fucking ridiculously awesome thing ever.

    Anyway, if you had one, would you sell it, or keep it?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:48 No.10985550

    >Perfect, well trained incredibly disiplined soldiers with no chance of any being rebels or rebel sympathizers.

    This is what clonefags actually believe.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:48 No.10985552
    oh I'm sure they have their own facilities, but they just don't talk about it. pretty wise decision I say, I wouldn't want the rebels finding it either.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:49 No.10985555
    Yeah, thats the imperial army or something, though I've never seen them. Every time the empire comes to desert-bumfuck its been stormtroopers, and almost every stormtrooper I've seen for a long while have jsut been ordinary people.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:49 No.10985564
    That's the way of the force, man.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:49 No.10985571

    Fuck you man. I just said the Corellians make good ships. Personally, I don't think any of them can fly any better than than a Gonk droid.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:50 No.10985578
    sell it that shits dangerous to have. did you report him to the proper authorities?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:51 No.10985592

    NEITHER! Fucking throw that shit out an airlock.
    Seriously. If the Empire were to trace that thing to you...
    >> Silchas Ruin !!YkfulRjm/Tb 07/07/10(Wed)03:51 No.10985593

    I have access to some interesting...semi-classified stuff now that archives in the Remnant are rather easy to get at, even for a lowly VSD captain as myself.

    Turns out the cloning facilities on Kamino were shit tier, and the douche Emperor had massive facilities hidden away in his warehouses for all his expansive toys. Rumor is Thrawn had one.

    Because we know the Republic fared so well. What with, death count in the trillions, hundreds of worlds razed or terraformed into hellish vong worlds...

    The Empire under the Emperor and the Moffs would have fared the same fate, but we all know Thrawn and a few of the more sane Sector Commanders would have crushed them.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:53 No.10985611
    what's all this 'remnant' and 'vong' shit?

    you guys really need to kick the deathstick habit
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:53 No.10985621

    That's nice. You now have something almost as useful as a Multitool--if it weren't so damn big and clumsy. It's a glorified brushcutter.

    Whackjob religious fanatics going against blasters with agricultural tools. No wonder they got wiped out.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)03:54 No.10985629
    My buddy got one of those from some smuggler, cut his hand off in like 5 minutes, Jabba just laughed. And then killed him because a one handed guard was useless and he didnt feel like paying his Cybernetics bills, but hey.

    Guy also liked Rancor porn, and was planning on trying to uh, do Jabba's. So I guess it was for the best really.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:56 No.10985663
    They would have done better than the Republic, and that's all that matters.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:57 No.10985671
         File1278489460.png-(209 KB, 478x358, 1276052391206.png)
    209 KB
    >Rancor porn
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)03:59 No.10985693
    Yeah man, people actually like stuff like that. Rancors themselves can't appreciate it, but some creepers get off to that garbage.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:01 No.10985725

    Y'know, as far as "dangerous sports" go, I think I'll stick with skysurfing.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:03 No.10985744
    worried father here in need of some advice
    my sons an archeologist and went to korriban for some big expedition. the first few weeks were good, he sent me holomails almost everyday telling me how well the expedition is coming along. but then the holomails gradually stopped coming.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:03 No.10985745
    Personally I think its retarded. More than a few signed up over the years for Jabba just for his Rancor, since with was like the only 'tame' one you could go near (sorta) that I know of, and every time it ended in them dieing for a job reason OR because they snuck in to the rancor's pen and were eaten. Which is why Jabba tolerated it I think.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:03 No.10985756
         File1278489839.jpg-(13 KB, 188x188, whywouldyoudothat.jpg)
    13 KB
    >Guy also liked Rancor porn, and was planning on trying to uh, do Jabba's.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:05 No.10985782
    >>10985744 haven't heard anything now for 2 standard months and the wife is worried sick.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:06 No.10985787

    Probably just met a girl or something.
    Don't tell me you believe those ghost stories they tell about Korriban?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:06 No.10985801
    I'm wondering if I should go there myself and see if everythings okay, but I don't want to look like some damned fool and have turn out that my sons just busy? advice?
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:07 No.10985824
    Personally I think that the hutt lovers are worse. I mean, both everyone else INCLUDING the hutts thinks its the most nasty in the galaxy, but they still try for it every once in a while. Jabba had them shot on sight, and I for one was glad to obey.

    Ugh, nasty nasty shit you run into as a hutt guard, the smell of the hutt is honestly the least disgusting thing, despite what most new guys seem to think. Pays worth it, but I am so glad to be leaving.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:09 No.10985855
    heard a few, but I always thought that place was some graveyard world of a long dead civilization. if he met a girl I would have known. the last letter semmed kinda...I dunno rushed...
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:10 No.10985863

    Send a droid as a "gift".
    Have the droid contact you (or have it tell your son to contact you) when it gets there.
    That way you just look like a caring dad (as opposed to a worried train-wreck), you get peace of mind, and your son gets a droid.
    I used to date an archaeologist. Trust me, they can never have too many droids.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:10 No.10985874
    A smuggler I knew was fucking terrified of Korriban, would talk about it but he near shat his pants after someone mispronounced 'horrible ban' near him. But then again I also knew a smuggler who thought that swamps were trying to kill him with goblins, so I dont know.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:12 No.10985903
    Haha sounds like that old wise tale of Dagobah crawling with little green men.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:14 No.10985923
    >they snuck in to the rancor's pen and were eaten.
    You know, for a lot of them, that IS the fetish.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:14 No.10985930
    wouldnt rather. Fucker in the holonet-bar next to me is smoking a deathstick and its making it hard to think. I think I'll show him some of the old Gamorrean charm. aka I'm gonna kill him if any wookies are here and cant understand. (only way to get it here, Mos Eisley is a terrible place for getting holonet really, odd given what a criminal hub it is, but what do I know about that kind of thing)
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:15 No.10985948
    >Send a droid as a "gift".
    Well that's easy enough IF YOU'RE MADE OUT OF CREDITS.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:16 No.10985965
    thanks for the input!!!
    the last hololetter said they found something big and quite a few artifacts too.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:16 No.10985968
    Nah man, just go some droid recycle plant, find one that works well enough, clean it up a bit, and just send it. Ain't hard, and if done right, makes people really happy.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:18 No.10985988
    Send him a little cheap shitty one with a camera hidden in it's eyething, Jabba loved using those, having them fake breaking down, then sneak about and send back info. Only worked on idiots, but for the price it was worth it.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:20 No.10986014

    You can find surplus labor droids for like 500 credits. If it's that much of a problem, take out a loan or something.
    Shit, how concerned are you about your SON?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:25 No.10986080
    very. he promised to write everyday, and eventually the hololetters just began to gradually stop.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:27 No.10986098
         File1278491234.gif-(39 KB, 563x270, Imperial_Navy.gif)
    39 KB


    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:27 No.10986103
    the last letter was rushed and he kept going on about how he found this old academy and discovered some old artifacts in there. then the letters stopped coming. that was 2 months ago
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:32 No.10986153

    inb4 "My son the Jedi" holopasta.
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:36 No.10986210
         File1278491794.jpg-(115 KB, 689x1109, Gamorrean_Guard_with_Axe.jpg)
    115 KB
    "Stupid sexy xeno ass" eh? You have Gamorrean tastes my friend, I'll be happy to post last months edition of "Playtusk" for you.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:37 No.10986215

    If it's that bad, I'll do you a favor.
    I've got a shipment of old Bactoid B-1s that were never paid for. I can take one to Korriban, and say it's from you.
    I'm in the Thanium sector now, so it's only a hop-skip and a jump to Korriban.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:37 No.10986217
    The Empire, Rebellion, and the New Republic are all illusions to foster the conceit that power is changing hands. Its been the same group of rulers the whole time. How else do you explain the Skywalker dynasty? Or the fact that the Emperor's bodyguard (and rumored personal assassin) later married the New Republics premier jedi?
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:40 No.10986258

    The hell are you talking about?
    "later married"? "New Republic"?
    Talk like that's likely to bring the Inquisitorius down on you, buddy.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:42 No.10986282
    Thx a bunch, now I can sleep at night
    I may or maynot have something in mind, that is if /tg/ wants to bite
    >> Gamorrean Guard 07/07/10(Wed)04:46 No.10986329
    I'd bite, so to speak.
    >> Anonymous 07/07/10(Wed)04:48 No.10986345
    if you do have something we'll need a new thread.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]