You fucking know this is how it would go down, and don't try to fucking argue any different. You know you've already lost. Just walk away, son, just walk away.
You know my main man Bats would totally kill that pussy. My answer is definitive and there's not a goddamn thing you can do about it.
My Batman x Sue Richards erotic fanfic is almost done! I'll put it up for you all to enjoy in the next couple days, after a bit of formatting and proofreading.
Oh Sue, my precious, soon you and the Dark Knight will be together, with that useless stretchy lump of asshole Mr. Fantastic horribly scarred with acid, set on fire and then put through a mulcher. The Bat is the only man enough to handle your wiles.
Someone on /co/ mentioned that Batman and Captain America would make for a great team-up, but I disagree, since the poster subtly implied that they'd be working as equals. As everyone with half a brain knows without a shadow of a doubt, Batman stands alone. You're either his sidekick or his enemy, and The Bat will tear you in half with his pinkies if you trouble him.
So what about a sidekick? I think Captain America would probably do alright as a sidekick, though I have my doubts. I mean, he's no Robin, but he's done a lot of kick-ass things on his own. (People would immediately point to when he beat up Hitler, but everyone's beaten up Hitler at least once. I don't know when the poor schmoe even had time for killing all those Jews in bewteen being defeated by superheroes with time machines.)
In the end, though, I don't think he's dark enough for the Bat. Those bright if patriotic colors would just stand out too well in the shadows of Gotham, and I don't think Cap has the stomach for the horrors that Batman has to witness on like a daily basis. Captain America, you're a great guy, but you just can't meet up to my standards when it comes to the Bat.